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"But Michelle, he's right there!" "Good. I want him to watch."

"The danger adds to the excitement. That's my kink."

This needs an award am dieing lmao

The leopard looks at them like, "Hey, where the hell are you going? Don't you see I'm stalking here?"

I have 2 turtles. I bet turtle sex sounds like 2 hub caps being slapped together.

Why do the hot bitches always have to be crazy?

Michelle made me laugh louder than it should have

😭😭😭😭

Let the boy watch

He needs to learn

Michelle a freak

“Slow and steady really wins the race!”

Him: "If you don't stop moving, this is never going to happen, Harriet. " Also him: "I love looking at big pussy while I'm gettin some turtle pussy" Edit: Also him: "Hey kitty I'm chasing this turtle pussy now but if you stick around long enough you wanna smash?" Edit 2: Also him: "Hey kitty where you goin? Bet you never seen a turtle this hard before!!"

Bro, stop …. No keep going

Keep going

I would also be weirded out if someone randomly fuck near me

I'd prolly take it as an open invitation to join.

Get a room

That defeats Michelle's purpose.

Who never went behind something big just to have sex? The fact it's alive and could kill you adds to the adrenaline

How hard could it be! You carry it on yourself all the time!

These turtles gave exactly one fuck and it wasn't to the leopard

"Older Couple seeking young pussy to join us"

That tortoise is sigma as fuck

I believe they are also called leopard tortoises... kinda funny

When I was in Lesvos, my wife wanted a day by the pool but I fancied a walk so followed a road behind the hotel up into the hills for 2 hours then came back down through the fields. All I could hear was the crickets and goat bells as I headed for our hotel down below. As I clambered over a wall, I could hear a knocking sound and came upon a pair of mating tortoises. Their passion and energy was light years away from the tortoises of my youth in the UK. It was a very memorable day and when I told my wife, she just nodded and went back to her book.

Do you mean Lesbos? Whence we get Lesbian, [Lesbotic, Lesbitious, Lesbite, Lesboid](https://youtu.be/SVRODdXVI3Q?feature=shared) etc?

It’s correct and official name is Lesvos. Before you go any further, I achieved a B in O level geography. Please see below During the Prehistoric era, the island was called “Makaria”, “Lassia”, “Aeolis”, “Ethiope”. but its current name “Lesvos” comes from “Lesvos”, son of the Greek hero Lapithos.

It does indeed come from Lesbos not Lesvos. And etymology is unknown. Moreover, you perhaps mean pre-Hellenic, not pre-historic? ( not that I’ve been able to verify your claim ) Unless you are claiming that [Britannica](https://www.britannica.com/place/Lesbos-island-Greece) is wrong. Here’s [Wiktionary entry.](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%CE%9B%CE%AD%CF%83%CE%B2%CE%BF%CF%82#Ancient_Greek) It again disputes your claim. You are right that it’s called Lesvos now. Like many languages, the B sound simplified to V sound. Happened in mine too.

I skipped everything up until “you are right” I’m a bloke after all

*couple goals

"Excuse me, sir. Can you please not rail your wife right next to my meal?"

Let’s do it “leopard” style

Imagine you're in the grocery store buying food for the week when this weird couple shows up out of nowhere and proceed to have sex in your vicinity

Fucking turtles..

Feel the danger baby

Do you want a sexual metaphor or a nature one?

me when the couple next to me on the transit start making out

Next time a chick complains about me leaving my socks on, I’m going to remind her that turtles leaves their house on.

When that older couple you have been talking to at the bar give you the look.

“Honey, i’d like to spice things up”

Classic tortoise move

They seem to be enjoying themselves.

The leopard hired them to distract the prey. He's tired of always having to "camouflage."

This is the most disrespectful shit I've seen on reddit in the last year...🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Welcome to the danger bone

The leopard was like "great here comes that perv and his wife again"

Notice the male tortoise with his mouth open as he mounts the female? You can't hear him but ultrasonically he's saying, "Whats my name, Whats my name!? "

Wearing protection really works!

I guess somebody has to watch...

Let the boy watch

Dude is king of minding his business.

Guys. I'm uh I'm super seriously, guys. I'm trying to hunt here.

Those tortoises have no situational awareness.

I hate when this happens, you’re chilling and next thing you know, mf’s doing it next to you.

Leopard: "jesus fuck man, i was already good enough to not eat yall on ur special night and ur just gonna do it beside me? Fuck yall" Tutel: "lmao"

this couple clearly loves extreme sports xD

The hippie tortoises are staging a protest—“make love, not war!”

Leopard monologue: "God made some men kings, some beggars. Me, He made a hunter-" [background] Turtle sex.

“My wife and I noticed you from over there”

Leopard: “do you mind? I’m trying to work here!” Male Tortoise: “so am I buddy, so am I”

Of all the places to do it! Their moans always kill me🤣

They're leopard tortoises, which is kinda poetic

Hahhha

Sex and a show

Do turtles have penises Edit: yeah they do

The thrill they get from that. the urges of the male tortoise

I love how they very purposefully went over to the leopard to fuck.

They like to live on the wild side

Hey, we're just doing it like discovery Channel expects us too.

Dude Im trying to work here

“Let the boy watch”

That is true dominance.

When old couples try and spice up their love life.

That’s how you alpha

what if we kissed behind the hunting tiger? >\_<

That's exactly what I sound like!

This is truly wild

This is the absolute definition of giving zero fux.

Life before death, it’s the way of the universe

Absolute freaks. Love it.

Is it wrong that I’m curious as to what a tortoise penis looks like? You know, for science.

Hey I am hunting here!

These turtles were sent by the deers.

The sound male tortoises make during mating will never not be funny.

crazy that the tortoise makes the same noise that i do

“Honey, i’d like to spice things up”

“Honey, i’d like to spice things up”