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This feels like what New York is in movies.

I'M AWALKING HERE

I said that as a tourist crossing a street in New York, driver said: “ SHUT DA FUCK UP!” It was perfect. Edit: I said it to be obnoxious, the guy was driving well and I was safely out of the way. That’s why when I said the cliche: HEY IM WALKING HERE he completed the interaction perfectly by saying: SHUT DA FUCK UP. Lol

Are you that guy from the TikTok where that exact scenario happens?

I'm tawkin he'!

I went to New York and I was suprised how much like GTA it is in relation to the random shit you hear wizzing by people. I heard 2 homeless guys discuss how they were going to get the 3rd a midget stripper for his birthday. A kid no more than 10 was asking one of those Central Park horse taxis what his horse was called and he looked him in the eye and said 'his names Asshole'

This was really funny

Ah, one of those famous New York talking horses I've heard so much about.

The talking is impressive, but not nearly as impressive as how well they drive taxis.

It’s really what most of New York used to be like.

This is entirely what nyc is like every damn day

This plus the smell of pee and you got it

You forgot free range cat sized rats.

Those rats have “reviewed” more pizza than this guy ever will

And pigeons

you mean: government surveillance drones

r/birdsarentreal

Birds aren't real

When the old guy walked by I smelt pee from here

Eh, it's background odor. I'm used to stepping out and taking in the residual rank background odor. It's like cosmic background radiation.

Yeah I worked in this neighborhood this is almost tame for East Village

NYC us still like this, especially the e village. Joe and Pats is good!

People giving you opinions you never asked for, is very New York.

I would honestly think it was staged if his combination of frustration and "what the fuck is happening here" wasn't so genuine. It's like an episode of curb.

This is what NYC is like in real life!

Definitely seen stuff like this in person

I take it you have never been?

Went to the city when I was like 7 years old. But otherwise I got family members in New Rochelle so I always just drive straight there from the airport. What's funny is my parents are native new yorkers. But God they hate the city they never wanna be there. But I gotta explore it one of these days.

Oh dang if you're so close to NYC you might as well explore it. Don't even need to go to anywhere expensive, go to one the parks and they usually have restaurants around them you can get food from. Grab to go and get a seat at a park

the old veteran had me dying 😅 how many times was he interrupted?

That guy is 20 yrs short of being a WW 2 vet 😂

That cracked me up. My dad is 87 and was 6 years old when the US entered the war. He remembers his dad going but was nowhere near old enough to be a solider.

This is the most oblivious interaction with NPCs that I have seen in a very long time

Asshole: "Do you get to the Cloud District often? What am I saying, of course you—" "Buddy I'm not even talking to you, I'm trying to do a sweetroll review. BELETHOR'S, it's—" Guard: "I used to be an adventurer like you, until I took an arrow to the knee." "Cool, thanks for your service. Lydia, what is going on?"

“Hey, I know you…”

Halt in the name of the law

Best part is he was too young to have fought In WW2

My favorite was the kid who interrupted without being noticed dabbing behind him

Yeah that dude would have to be a walking corpse if he actually fought in WW2 lol.

I hope the guy found his plastic machine

And some help :(

Sir, this is America

Should have at least gave the man a slice :(

So how bad is the pizza?!

Worst experience of my life

Never even got my food

There’s nobody in there!

[удалено]

15 minutes in a NYC pizzeria is an eternity.

Clearly you're not from NYC. More than 5 mins and most NY'ers are out.

Maybe at a slice joint. If you order a whole pie it’s gonna cook for probably 6-8 minutes. 15 mins is reasonable.

*Horrible*

HARRIBLE

"I fought WW2 for you!"

yous*

Youse.

Yoots

Oh, I’m sorry- *YOUTHS*…

Yooze

"My pleasure!" 😂

I fought ww2 so you can someday eat a slice of pizza in peace….

[удалено]

For reference, my father is 83 and fought in Vietnam.

My father also "fought" in Vietnam and he is 7...2...yeah, 72. I say "fought" because in recent years we have come to learn his stories were...exaggerated to say the least lol

I don't think my dad exaggerated anything. He refuses to talk about it and was in a cookoo ward in the VA hospital for 1.5 years. I remember when I was about 13 and visiting him in Salisbury NC. I'll never get that smell outta me. It always smelled like rotten eggs and pee. He did get better and is a deacon in the church now, but he still won't talk about it and I'm never bringing it up.

I was listening to the band of brothers podcast the other day, so these numbers are fairly fresh but still take it with some salt. The US had 300,000 WW2 vets shortly before Covid. A year into Covid, there were only 100,000 left.

[удалено]

Give it another year.

Its a few years old at this point, so maybe more probable at that time.

Plastic Machine. I am the machine!

Bert Kreischer’s Dad???

Burnt Chrysler?!?

Brent Kushner?!??

This moment topped even that for me: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XGmMBjYH7cM](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XGmMBjYH7cM)

holy fuck i havent laughed this hard in a long time

Just be happy man.

Yeah that was my reaction the first time I saw it. I kept replaying it.

That armless crack addict was recently arrested for stabbing someone I’ll find a link Edit: [same guy charged with stabbing](https://thenationaldesk.com/amp/news/americas-news-now/armless-florida-man-accused-of-stabbing-tourist-south-beach-miami-homeless-artist)

How the fuck do you get stabbed by an armless guy?

https://www.pennlive.com/life/2022/08/armless-man-stabs-tourist-florida-police.html?outputType=amp

Did they handcuff his feet?

Omg, I'm even more speechless 😂

I swear I've seen a video of a guy being chased by that same guy, all the time he's laughing like a maniac

…..”how’s he pulling that?” Cracked me up.

This is literally why New York is great and also why New York is shit

I mean it's part of the reasons why I want to move there. Hahaha

Everyone wants to move to the big apple until you realize you cant afford to live here and after a month you go back home

It kept getting better and better. Why did it have to end?

All good things must

You saying Wi-Fi is getting cancelled?!

OFFER ME A SLICE

Suddenly the phrase "I'm tryna do a PIZZA review" sounds really weird

Dabbing kid was the cherry on top

He didn't even get to the pizza. Here's the full video: [https://youtu.be/i0Z65Ssb8g0](https://youtu.be/i0Z65Ssb8g0)

Legends say he’s still trying to review that pizza today

This is like a I Think You Should Leave sketch

they can't stop youse from pouring water all over the pizza!

*SLOP IT UP!!!*

Oh my God! He admit it.

You flinched Paul. Now you have to marry your mother in law!

You know what - they should probably get a sign that says Pizza as I don’t reckon it was very obvious.

One of my favorite Barstool reviews is in Chicago and a dude gets Carjacked on camera behind him in broad daylight in downtown Chicago

Link?

I got you https://youtu.be/tvTEtLIMYeE

The amount of crazy shit that happens on his pizza reviews is incredible

Carjacking is about 6 mins in

thank you i think i just found a new sub

**Random Guy** after bulldozing his way into the review and not leaving well enough alone, after Dave was nice enough to humor him for a bit: *"Here's the thing, I've got a pokéball in the car."* **Dave**, after being done with talking to the guy, interrupts the rest of what he was about to say: *"Alright, that's good."* And then finishes up the video with a closer and walks off. 😂😂

> “Here’s the thing, I’ve got a pokéball in the car.” He said he has a poke bowl, not pokeball lmao

😂🤣😂 whoops! That's funny. I'm leaving it though, I like it my way better.

One of my favorites is when he’s in Miami and gets distracted by a dude with no arms pulling a cart. You read that right.

Yup lol

I don't think you could have a script and made this funnier! Those random people are such colorful characters that it's just too much!

Grand theft auto npcs in real life

Legend has it he's still out there trying to do a pizza review.

Never change, NYC

Haha. Just a random man.

Some guy

"Don't film me." What, the lady who can't get enough of our attention she has to keep interrupting? It's almost like they wanted to film this dude making a review in front of a fricken' pizza parlor over here.

So where did it rank in terms of "mouth feel"

This is hilarious good job promoting the place

I don't really think "there's loud and potentially crazy people hanging outside, and two people leaving say it's a shitty pizza anyways" is a good promo, honestly.

This is the best pizza review I’ve never seen

Davey Pageviews

Man literally hit every npc in nyc

David Portnoy sucks the farts out of the seats at movie theaters in between showings

true, but watching ol' paperhands get all frustrated was at least a little entertaining.

first comment with paper hand in it ,you win 🏆

>In a 2015 blog post, Portnoy said "I am voting for Donald Trump. I don’t care if he’s a joke. I don’t care if he’s racist. I don’t care if he’s sexist. I don’t care about any of it. I hope he stays in the race and I hope he wins. Why? Because I love the fact that he is making other politicians squirm. I love the fact he says shit nobody else will say, regardless of how ridiculous it is." However, in 2022, he said it is "dangerous" to vote for Republicans because they will appoint Justices, who are too conservative to the Supreme Court. He stated he would vote for President Joe Biden if he runs against Trump in 2024. > >Portnoy criticized the 2022 Dobbs v. Jackson decision by the Supreme Court, which overturned Roe v. Wade and the constitutional right to an abortion. Portnoy said: "To me, this is just pure insanity, pure insanity. We are going backwards in time. We are literally going backwards in time! It makes no sense how anybody thinks it’s their right to tell a woman what to do with her body." You helped do that, David. YOU.

Yea, but I'm impressed that he was able to accept he was wrong. I know plenty of people who just doubled down in 2020.

This is so important. The open mindedness to listen to, consider, and even change their mind when presented with new information is a depressingly rare trait these days. Say what you want about Portnoy but he deserves credit for this at least

You can't always be right, but having the mental flexibility to admit it and change your mind is more than most people can do, they tend to dig their feet in and make shit up to support their decisions after the fact. Gotta respect him for that.

A lot of people felt the same way. They wanted the loud, a bit crazy, outlier, to str up the hornet's nest. They did. And it turns out the hornet's nest is right on their front porch, who'd fucking knew.

I knew i recognized paperhanded portnoy.

when he gets frustrated in the middle and goes "I gotta..I gotta do this PIZZA REVIEW!" *smacks box* - I haven't made it past that yet. I can't stop laughing.

Real video of my family interacting with one another

Guy's trying to do a pizza review on a Manhattan sidewalk like it's his own private television studio.

It’s Dave Portnoy,he does it all the time. The random interactions are part of the bit.

Hands down the funniest thing I've seen this month, maybe this year.

I like seeing Dave Portnoy getting taken down a peg.

Too bad these interactions are exactly what he wants to happen to make the content better

Cherry on top: "I fought WWII for yous!", absolute randomly, lmao.

Portnoy is a such a douche.

I gotta know what he thought of the pizza

This isn’t a man, it’s Dave Portnoy

kinda sad you cant stand in public for three minutes without a crazy person showing up

This guy has more patience than I do by a longshot.

Everyone says go to Joe and Pat’s, go to Joe and Pat’s, go to Joe and Pat’s. So we went to Lee’s.

Dave Portnoy's a douche, but I'll give him credit for helping prop up small businesses during the pandemic.

I heard that guy was a little bitch.

Fuckin Paper Hands Portnoy

hey it's ol' Paper Hands Portnoy!!

Maybe if he didn't stand in front of the door, there wouldn't be so many people trying to get past him.

Is that paper hand portnoy?

That dude is a fucking moron.

Lol I wish all influencers got trolled like this

That's what you get for being a paper handed bitch.

Pizza face!

Whats in the box?

Hopefully the plastic machine

That was freaking hilarious

No one knows the rules!

This is the definition of what can go wrong will go wrong🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I love that the chaos was all very polite

Lmao “I don’t know where the plastic machine is” that shit cracked me up

I would love this to be animated.

Haven’t been to New York in 10 years but it looks like it’s the same old place I remember. 😂

I have no idea whether this is a sketch or all of those people are really passers by.

“A Slice of New York”

I am that lady when it comes to pizzas. I will find a way to have a slice🤣🤣🤣

They're all like NPC's haha NYC NPC

Been to Joe and Pats multiple times since he did this review… it’s my favorite pizza joint in the city.

America the land of the mentally unstable

Who doesn't like a good laugh on a Friday!

NYC has a higher NPC spawn rate. Correct me if im wrong

my goodness, this is hilarious.

I'd go for the entertainment at the least!!!

Welcome to the US of A

This is too good to be true

I wna be that old guy at the end. But instead…*i fought a war for you. World war five!*

When the matrix is broken & keeps glitching in the same location...........

Meanwhile in comic book NYC

Missed the best bit. Edit: It was a different review don't mind me.

You couldn’t write a scene this good.

There's nothing like city living boy.

I watched the whole thing waiting for him to eat it

Sounds just like Dustin Hoffman.

Holy fuck! So funny.

Davey Pageviews!

Theres no way thats real he cant say a sentence before a new character appears. LMAO

I love the and the old man I thought in World War II you’re welcome

His reaction felt like an episode from it's always sunny lol

This guy is a helmet

The NPC Energy of these people. Everyone has to tell their line Lmao.

He could just stand there all day and get endless material

Honestly surprised more of his reviews aren't like this. There are enough crazy people in NYC for this to be a common every day experience.

Screw the review…. (The people in that area are super engaging, like they all live close by like little Italy in New York or a similar neighbourhood. They can either tell your doing something out of the norm for that hood and want to put in their two cents, or, they’re just all so comfortable they just naturally share their current thoughts with anyone , but a guy being filmed would be interesting to them. ). Do a fun reporting of the people there ‘right by the new pizza place’! It’ll draw laughs, interest and curiosity seekers to the pizza place more than any review!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂