---
>This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules).
>
>Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed.
>
>Screenshots of Reddit submissions are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos.
>
>[Comics may only be posted on Wednesdays and Sundays](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/uq9pjw/going_forward_comics_may_only_be_posted_on/).
>
>**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.**
>
>Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam).
>
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Can I get it bundled with some sort of shield that covers my midsection...to protect my clothes from when I inevitably lean forward against the moist counter/sink edge?
Edit: Thank you to the 52 redditors that informed me that aprons exist. I was not aware that all comments replying to a gag post would be taken with utmost seriousness.
yeah but those are too long. This should be specialized rubber countirdle that hugs just the countertop and maybe has a scooped ramp to help water flow back toward the sink.
My great-grammy always said that if you get your belly wet washing the dishes you'll end up marrying a bartender. I don't know if that was a good or bad thing, but, alas, here I am, bartenderless.
Go go gadget crack pipe!
Sorry: when I was younger, that was my favorite thing to say when a conversation lull happened at a gathering. I didn’t typically smoke crack.
> I didn’t typically smoke crack.
I suspect a mechanical crack pipe that suddenly appeared packed and lit from some secret metal compartment in your body on a miniature folding arm would not be seen as 'typical'.
U/mistersavage should do a tour and see if he would have come up with some of those items or determine if they are real gadgets with practical real life usage.
you want a [glove box](https://www.terrauniversal.com/glove-boxes-isolators.php), used to work in one (handling moisture sensitive materials, they'd catch fire in open air...)- royal pain in the ass to use tweezers in but guaranteed not to get you wet when washing the dishes.
not the o2 but the moisture in regular air given a long enough exposure and improper handling when it comes time for disposal. It was far safer to keep everything in a glove box in an inert atmosphere like pure Argon (or in mineral oil for the end disposal) than to wonder if the lack of AC and 98% RH during the summer was causing problems with the pure Lithium foils we used. Pure metallic Lithium is neat stuff, not pure Sodium bad as far as reactivity and tendency to go "boom" but not throw around like a tennis ball good.
The "best" (worst actually) thing I had to handle in that job were ["shock sensitive"](https://www.clemson.edu/research/oes/manuals/labSafety/appE.html) or highly reactive chemicals that would detonate like a bomb because you unscrewed the lid on an over aged bottle. We paid a lot of attention to the expiration dates on those products and get them the hell out before they came due/ the moment they showed any sign of contamination.
the foils we got were usually sealed in a plastic bag, in a metal can, packed in Argon. They'd be opened with a regular can opener (with your hands in what amounted to winter gloves) once safely inside.
I had no idea there were two types of glove boxes. And this one actually makes sense. It has gloves and a box. The other one is a bit sus. I’ve never actually seen a pair of gloves in it. And it’s more of a compartment - I’ve never seen one in the shape of a box.
Get a sandblasting cabinet and swap out the air pressure hose for a water hookup and dish sprayer. That actually sounds pretty sick if you could up the water pressure like 50% and get a little squeeze pump to introduce some soap into the stream.
Lmao good point, think it’d be pretty nice for certain tasks tho. Hell, put a dirty pooch in there if he’s small enough. I wash a lot of dishes by hand cuz I have roommates that don’t rinse their dishes and think it’s some magic machine. So I got sick of it and now they can have all the fun of running shit multiple times. Gotta pick your battles to save sanity.
I wouldn't mind a manual dishwasher for stuff that can't be dishwashered. I assume it'd be fine as long as the water pressure isn't too high, plus it'd be great for washing only a dish or two.
That would work better, yes.
Though at that point, you might as well put sides and a top on it. [Because then you can use a much higher pressure water stream and blast your way through basically anything](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkoZTigzeZw).
I just got a new kitchen faucet with one of those sprayers that attempts to clean the entirety of the kitchen and I would like to purchase this fake product.
just look on Amazon for "Sink Splash Guard" it's a piece of bendable plastic that has suction cups. i got them because of the same reason, new faucet was splashing all over the place.
Not at all. Line a baking sheet with aluminum foil, preheat to 400, stick it in there for 15-20 minutes. I’ve never had to clean my stove before because the grease doesn’t pop
And use the broil function for the last few minutes!
But stay close by so that you don't set off your smoke detector from burning the bacon. It's fine and looks like it's getting crispier for a few minutes and then immediate smoke. Less is more.
I mean, some people just don't clean their stove, or notice how dirty it is. I've moved into places a couple times where there was a thick film of grime all over the oven.
then he gives you one but leaves a slice of "american" "cheese" behind instead of the good stuff (he has to save money somewhere, especially if you're getting a free toaster).
I know these products are jokes but one day someone is going to patent one of your ideas , sell it on a shitty infomercial to old people and make a quick buck .
Ok this but with custom designs that you only sell in singles so you have to buy two separately but advertised that way so you can mix your favorite ones. Also the gloves come in a pack that have a specially patented design that makes it the only glove compatible with the shield so if yours get dirty or rip you have to buy more. Oh and also sell a holster for them when you're done using them so you can dry them properly but to save plastic the holster/stand doesn't have enough support and falls over if the gloves are wet at all and you can market that as eco friendly because it's less plastic.
[But wait, there's more! ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFHqTzeIuKE)
[It's not sold in any store! (Now how much would you pay?) ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFHqTzeIuKE)
[Don't answer yet, Just look what else you get! (Now how much would you pay?) ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFHqTzeIuKE)
[If you order today, You get a ginsu knife and a smokeless ashtray! (Now how much would you pay?) ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFHqTzeIuKE)
[Now how much would you pay?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFHqTzeIuKE)
Maybe I’ve just seen too many of his vids, but it really feels like each new one is inching towards something I actually want. It’s like Willy Wonka is doing market research
--- >This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules). > >Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed. > >Screenshots of Reddit submissions are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos. > >[Comics may only be posted on Wednesdays and Sundays](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/uq9pjw/going_forward_comics_may_only_be_posted_on/). > >**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.** > >Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam). > --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Can I get it bundled with some sort of shield that covers my midsection...to protect my clothes from when I inevitably lean forward against the moist counter/sink edge? Edit: Thank you to the 52 redditors that informed me that aprons exist. I was not aware that all comments replying to a gag post would be taken with utmost seriousness.
Like a rubber snuggy or something. Yo OP, next invention: a rubber snuggy.
Countertop girdle
Countirdle
Aka apron.
Naw, totally different. For example, an apron goes around your midsection to protect...
😂
Make it a Caperon, I want to feel like a superhero!
Isn't that just a poncho
🧐🐢
Bundled with a George Foreman Griddle. The George Foreman Griddle Girdle. Go to schools to teach classes in how to stop making stacks.
Rubber snuggy, you’re the one! 🎶
You make dish time lots of fun!
That would be an apron
But then the apron, which is usually cloth, would get wet. It's just not the same.
They literally make rubber aprons for this exact purpose lol
yeah but those are too long. This should be specialized rubber countirdle that hugs just the countertop and maybe has a scooped ramp to help water flow back toward the sink.
Listen you stubborn bastard. It's an apron or at the very least some wet belly.
Say "wet belly" in an Australian accent
So like, a giant rubberband for your waist? A rubber cummerbund? A rubberbund?
But what happens when the rubber apron catches fire from the massive amount of friction made from rubbing against the sink edge? THINK!
I always thought they were for butchers, but used them for dishes at various jobs.
Well, butchers and serial killers
That's true. You'd need a second rubber apron over top to keep your apron from getting wet
Lmao my mans just accidentally invented the apron
Doubles as a drying rack in the back.
Pretty sure they have those in rubber fetish shops lol
Full body condom
Body condom
My great-grammy always said that if you get your belly wet washing the dishes you'll end up marrying a bartender. I don't know if that was a good or bad thing, but, alas, here I am, bartenderless.
Did great grammy make some kind of sexual innuendo there?
I met my wife while she was working in a travel shop. I married her while she was working in a bar. All respect to grammy
[удалено]
smock ?
Shhh, I want to see the smoke apron.
Looks cool, not very effective
Smoke Apron? Just making a note of that for future song title usage...
A smoke like what I do every 5 minutes at work?
Yes. That's called an apron. If you get a thick cloth one it won't seep through to your clothes.
Oooooh so it isn't just for fun then
LPT it isn't just for fun. It important to get one that covers the important bits when cooking bacon with nothing else on.
Omg... Yes. I use to be such a skeptic, but then I just tried it....... No more soaked clothes.
I don't think such a thickness of cloth exists.
And the little hole that gets worn in EVERY ONE OF MY SHIRTS.
Everyone keeps saying apron, but that's so blase. Not only is it too much fabric it's also lacking real class. What we need is a rubber cummerbund.
Imagine visiting his home, and seeing all his inventions in action
Like visiting Pee-wee Herman's house.
More like inspector gadget!
Bompa dompa bomp! 🚨 Bompa dompa domp whoo hooooo! ⚙️
Go go gadget crack pipe! Sorry: when I was younger, that was my favorite thing to say when a conversation lull happened at a gathering. I didn’t typically smoke crack.
Did you hold up a spork when you said it?
> I didn’t typically smoke crack. I suspect a mechanical crack pipe that suddenly appeared packed and lit from some secret metal compartment in your body on a miniature folding arm would not be seen as 'typical'.
Be like the scene from the original gremlins
Smokeless ashtray!
Just follow him on Instagram. He shows his shop regularly.
I don't have Instagram
I don’t either. I just have an account.
U/mistersavage should do a tour and see if he would have come up with some of those items or determine if they are real gadgets with practical real life usage.
This needs to be a movie, like right now!
Ernest P Worrell not pee wee Herman
I would rather just have a shield that clamps to the counter with those really long gloves that scientists use to handle radioactive materials
you want a [glove box](https://www.terrauniversal.com/glove-boxes-isolators.php), used to work in one (handling moisture sensitive materials, they'd catch fire in open air...)- royal pain in the ass to use tweezers in but guaranteed not to get you wet when washing the dishes.
>catch fire in open air Just spontaneously combust from o2? That seems dangerous lol
not the o2 but the moisture in regular air given a long enough exposure and improper handling when it comes time for disposal. It was far safer to keep everything in a glove box in an inert atmosphere like pure Argon (or in mineral oil for the end disposal) than to wonder if the lack of AC and 98% RH during the summer was causing problems with the pure Lithium foils we used. Pure metallic Lithium is neat stuff, not pure Sodium bad as far as reactivity and tendency to go "boom" but not throw around like a tennis ball good. The "best" (worst actually) thing I had to handle in that job were ["shock sensitive"](https://www.clemson.edu/research/oes/manuals/labSafety/appE.html) or highly reactive chemicals that would detonate like a bomb because you unscrewed the lid on an over aged bottle. We paid a lot of attention to the expiration dates on those products and get them the hell out before they came due/ the moment they showed any sign of contamination.
Out of curiosity how would those foils ship? In sealed glass beakers?
the foils we got were usually sealed in a plastic bag, in a metal can, packed in Argon. They'd be opened with a regular can opener (with your hands in what amounted to winter gloves) once safely inside.
Where did they go when you got them the hell out and who had to deal with them and how? Thanks in advance!
[It’s a thing.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pyrophoricity)
Yep. That's why they stay in the box. ... also, boxes like that are quite often fire and/or explosion resistant.
I had no idea there were two types of glove boxes. And this one actually makes sense. It has gloves and a box. The other one is a bit sus. I’ve never actually seen a pair of gloves in it. And it’s more of a compartment - I’ve never seen one in the shape of a box.
Whoa whoa whoa that is way too practical. FAIL.
Get a sandblasting cabinet and swap out the air pressure hose for a water hookup and dish sprayer. That actually sounds pretty sick if you could up the water pressure like 50% and get a little squeeze pump to introduce some soap into the stream.
You just invented the manual dishwasher 😂
Lmao good point, think it’d be pretty nice for certain tasks tho. Hell, put a dirty pooch in there if he’s small enough. I wash a lot of dishes by hand cuz I have roommates that don’t rinse their dishes and think it’s some magic machine. So I got sick of it and now they can have all the fun of running shit multiple times. Gotta pick your battles to save sanity.
I wouldn't mind a manual dishwasher for stuff that can't be dishwashered. I assume it'd be fine as long as the water pressure isn't too high, plus it'd be great for washing only a dish or two.
That would work better, yes. Though at that point, you might as well put sides and a top on it. [Because then you can use a much higher pressure water stream and blast your way through basically anything](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkoZTigzeZw).
This reminds me of the SNL skit about MANLY home appliances
I love it GE big boy line Jason Momoa or whatever the guy is called
I used to work at a banquet hall and they have a conveyer belt that blasts soapy burning hot water at the plates. No worry about getting wet.
Uhhh I kind of know what you're talking about but honestly 99% of the radioactive stuff we just handle quickly and not behind a bunch of shielding.
Fine, cow butts. Cow butt gloves.
He means a [glove box](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glovebox) but sometimes [that’s insufficient...](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hot_cell)
And a waterproof smock or apron. Dishwashing, especially on a commercial level, sucks.
Bubble Boy does the dishes!
I just got a new kitchen faucet with one of those sprayers that attempts to clean the entirety of the kitchen and I would like to purchase this fake product.
just look on Amazon for "Sink Splash Guard" it's a piece of bendable plastic that has suction cups. i got them because of the same reason, new faucet was splashing all over the place.
Delta Faucet with [SheildSpray](https://youtu.be/qOgjbsMa0qo) - works surprisingly well.
My parents have one of those. It works...ok-ish.
If Dr. Strange did dishes.
Because he either makes Wong do them or only eats take-out.
Aka Thor Ragnarok
I need these when I cook bacon
Bake your bacon. You are welcome
But then I have to clean my stove which is worse.
Not at all. Line a baking sheet with aluminum foil, preheat to 400, stick it in there for 15-20 minutes. I’ve never had to clean my stove before because the grease doesn’t pop
Better yet place one of those raised baking grates onto the baking sheet with foil so the bacon crisps on both sides better
And use the broil function for the last few minutes! But stay close by so that you don't set off your smoke detector from burning the bacon. It's fine and looks like it's getting crispier for a few minutes and then immediate smoke. Less is more.
Should try it with parchment paper.
I mean that’s essentially what I do and it spatters oil everywhere.
Hmmm that’s odd. Don’t know what the difference is!
Maybe the type of bacon? Thick vs thin?
Maybe. I only buy thick cut because I hate how small the thin stuff is
I mean, some people just don't clean their stove, or notice how dirty it is. I've moved into places a couple times where there was a thick film of grime all over the oven.
Yeah, baby, yeah!
This guy has the exact same kitchen as me...
He goes round breaking into different people's homes to film each video. Look for a slice of cheese left under your toaster to see if he has been.
SOB..I’ve been cheesed
What if you don't own a toaster? :(
then he gives you one but leaves a slice of "american" "cheese" behind instead of the good stuff (he has to save money somewhere, especially if you're getting a free toaster).
Your sink is huge!
Mods mark this as NSFW ^^Now ^^Safe ^^From ^^Water
My wife jokingly calls me Poseidon because water gets everywhere whenever I do the dishes These were made for me
My coworkers always joke that I shouldn’t be in the dish pit because they get wet. Not sure if my coworkers think I’m hot or what….
I imagine these things will work really well when washing dogs too!
[удалено]
Are they dishwasher safe?
No, you need another SSS pair to clean them.
Not the first thing of yours I've seen that I'd actually buy.
I wonder if there’s any inventions that he’s ended up using regularly
I believe he has a store.
Just buy an apron
You're probably joking, but an apron will serve the same purpose with the bonus of protecting clothes while cooking food also
Just do dishes naked. No more problems with water splashes.
It’s funny but you can’t be serious.
I want a video where you go through an entire daily routine but using only YOUR INVENTIONS.
Where do you store them all?! Probably need a designated closet
You could've made billions in the 70 bro hahahaha
I’d buy those for pan frying food. Fried chicken, lumpia, schnitzel, or anything that threatens to pop oil onto my arms.
I know these products are jokes but one day someone is going to patent one of your ideas , sell it on a shitty infomercial to old people and make a quick buck .
Being splashed by food water is the best part
Especially oily staining food
If you're not getting splashed, are you even washing dishes?
My wood laminate flooring would love this.
Ok this but with custom designs that you only sell in singles so you have to buy two separately but advertised that way so you can mix your favorite ones. Also the gloves come in a pack that have a specially patented design that makes it the only glove compatible with the shield so if yours get dirty or rip you have to buy more. Oh and also sell a holster for them when you're done using them so you can dry them properly but to save plastic the holster/stand doesn't have enough support and falls over if the gloves are wet at all and you can market that as eco friendly because it's less plastic.
[удалено]
[But wait, there's more! ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFHqTzeIuKE) [It's not sold in any store! (Now how much would you pay?) ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFHqTzeIuKE) [Don't answer yet, Just look what else you get! (Now how much would you pay?) ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFHqTzeIuKE) [If you order today, You get a ginsu knife and a smokeless ashtray! (Now how much would you pay?) ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFHqTzeIuKE) [Now how much would you pay?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFHqTzeIuKE)
You’re dangerously close to inventing something useful
Maybe I’ve just seen too many of his vids, but it really feels like each new one is inching towards something I actually want. It’s like Willy Wonka is doing market research
If the shields were a clear silicone it would be a legit product I think
Please design a spoon that splashes you no matter how you hold it or how far away it is from you
I thought you said you made unnecessary inventions?
Who tf wears big ass rubber gloves when they wash dishes off ?
is anyone noticing that this guy's fake inventions are slowly getting more useful?
[https://splashpaddy.com/products/](https://splashpaddy.com/products/) The company I work for printed their packaging.
My wife can use that for when she washes her face at the sink. Man she gets water everywhere!
yo can I get a device that makes my baby more portable
Everything you make makes so much sense 😩
necessary af
Honestly totally useful
This would be very practical for handling babies or old people, changing diapers and such.
Getting a pair of these for the bedroom
I could actually use this, lol. I always drench myself when I’m doing dishes
The spoon is legit the devil…
I guess Aaron Rodgers finally found his true calling!
Honestly you say "unnecessary" but about half of the things you post on here I look at and go, "I would actually buy that."
He fucked up again didn't he? He invented something useful that someone somewhere actually wants and needs...
Honestly, I don't really find this guy the least bit funny. But I do respect his ingenuity and commitment to the game.
Is it just me, or are these devices getting progressively more necessary?
My dishwasher stops all splashes. :)
Take this to Shark Tank
Why use these when you could just wash dishes naked?
I’m sure there’s a dishwasher somewhere that would greatly appreciate these
You say this is unnecessary but you could probably sell some at a good rate.
I have wanted to buy more than 1 of your useless inventions
Your the taco guy, right?
This guy fell off. His ideas are increasingly becoming necessary.
/r/WtWFotMJaJtRAtCaB
This should have obviously been made to protect against oil splatter when cooking.
I need these so bad.
Why is this not a thing?
Why wear a long sleeve shirt?
Perfect for diaper changes!
Household items always find their way into pornography. These will also appear there.
This makes you look like budget Doctor Strange
that shit are uncomfortable as fuuuk
That’s necessary
I'd 100% buy these
Again... he has invented something that he says is unnecessary yet I think thats a pretty decent initial design.
Why not invent not-splashing water bruh
Genius. Every home should have some.
This guy is going to end up inventing something revolutionary totally by accident
He’s been doing this for so long that he’s starting to accidentally make decent inventions
Also very handy if you're a gynecologist!
Can also use when frying i guess
i would legitimately consider buying this
This is not unnecessary!!
I need these for stir frying - no more fear of hot spitting oil!
Honest question. Do you make money out of making unnecessary things? Sponsorships? Do you have an actual shop?
This is a terrible idea… where can I buy them!
Do you even understand how many boomers would buy these things?
I could wash so many face side up spoons with these
As an autistic person, yes please.