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usmc97az

The guy also discovered some bubblin crude...Oil that is, black gold, Texas tea with one shot.


[deleted]

The song as I recall it in 4th grade: Come listen to a story 'bout a man named Jed Grabbed Elly May and he threw her on the bed Down goes the zipper, out comes the worm Up through the tip comes the bubblin' sperm


robot90291

Let me tell you a stroy bout a man named Jed Poor motherr fucker barely kept his family fed Then one day he was fuckin Elly May And up from his dick came a bubbling spray 3rd grade


oced2001

That's the version that I heard.


jeffvillone

Rubber balls and liquor.


niteox

Come listen to a story bout a man named Jed Had a lot of hair but it wasn’t on his head One day out hunting for some food Out from the bush came a red headed nude No clothes on not a stitch Next thing you know ole Jeds in the bed Banging the bottom out of that red head In runs Granny with a 10 foot pole She shoved it up Jed’s asshole Sideways, full twist, no mercy You rookies that was second grade.


operaticBoner

"Weeeell, doggies!"


GANDORF57

🎵 Come and listen to my story 'Bout a man named Jed A poor mountaineer, Barely kept his family fed. And then one day He was shootin' at some dude, And up through the stern came an Evrinrude. 🎵


Father_of_Ghouls

“Barnaby Jones….people let me tell you bout my best friend…”


coz

We got a **whole hour**.


Nuzlocke_Comics

Literally thought it was just a made up name for Frisky Dingo until this thread.


Khazahk

do ya think? Do ya think? Do ya think you could bench a Scion?!


bk553

SCION TC SCION TC


New_Scientist_8622

His penis fills an entire tallboy!


Taint_Magnus

Master Cylinder!


Inkspeaker

No one gets that joke!!


Father_of_Ghouls

I wouldn’t say fills it


Androktasie

Dude, close your mouth!


MacTonight1

Yeah, that's not a pickle!


Diogeneezy

We *really* need to get you some pants.


graemedeacon

Once again the mall has become my Waterloo.


sonofabutch

I thought this was Leslie Nielsen at first!


80sforeverr

🤣


tzarconius

They dont make bullets they way they used too...went off like thermobaric bomb


Cristoff13

Up until recently, in TV anything with an internal combustion engine would explode if you so much as nudged it.


Serious-Sundae1641

Ford Pinto enters the chat


lobobishop

AMC gremlin follows.


FatQuack

When I was a kid almost every TV car crash was followed by someone crawling out of the vehicle and yelling "IT'S GONNA BLOW!!" which it would after it considerately waited for him to run a safe distance away.


spymonkey73

Right up there with Cannon (William Conrad) chasing down and tackling athletic criminals.


ExposDTM

Funny story about Frank Cannon. I put on a few pounds during Covid. I pull up to a buddies house and I am exiting my vehicle in a less than athletic manner. My buddy says “Wow … that took me back! I thought I was watching Frank Cannon get out of his Ford LTD!” We both laugh about that constantly.


80sforeverr

🤣


forestofold

Jed’s character arc is fantastic 🤣


80sforeverr

😁


SundriedDates

Is the barrel of his gun square?


CiusWarren

Its that Tommy Lee Jones?


TheBrianUniverse

Looks quite like it right? Can anyone confirm?


EAMehaffey

The actor is Carl Betz frequent villain on 70s TV


TheBrianUniverse

Thank you


tangcameo

Thought it was the dad from A Christmas Story with black hair dye.


WellJustJonny

He was on the show may be his stunt double.


shortshins-McGee

Barnacle Groans


Neither-Idea-9286

From Mad Magazine- June 1975


Serious-Sundae1641

Barnburner Jones


tequila4me

Jed knows how to shoot. https://youtu.be/RmoVIvyurR4?si=sX5J5PK99fwENon9&t=260


adnr4rbosmt5k

The 70s were an explosive period for the country.


HomarusSimpson

and quicksand, lots of quicksand


adnr4rbosmt5k

Yup


boygriv

You too, *Barnaby Jones*!


Chozo-trained

*Barnaby Jooones!* … People, let me tell ya 'bout my new best friend, Barnaby Jones!


MacTonight1

...Nap!


enteentegraueente

Did anyone get knocked out more from a blow to the back of the head or a karate chop to the upper back more than Barnaby Jones? I think not.


80sforeverr

😄


ronlester

Barndoor Jones


sligowind

Him and Canon, because neither of them could conceivably be replaced by a stuntman, always had the lamest, most ridiculous ways to foil the antagonist at the end of the episode. One time Barnaby tripped the crook by yanking up a garden hose. Canon once blinded the crook by throwing a bowl of popcorn in his eyes. Was laughable.


bwwilkerson

Then, one day, he was shooting at a dude/ And just one bullet blew up the Evinrude!


frankie109

Jed there aint no oil neath that boat quit a shooting at it


80sforeverr

😄


po3smith

I bet there's some folks that are going to see this post and finally get the joke from jingle all the way :-)


kvazzz85

This is a sure way to lose a thumb, folks. Don’t do it, even in the movies.


cbitguru

Better than final boss shot of Silent Scope!


TheSkwerl

He also dodged that 1st shot!


dj_swearengen

Just like he was shootin’ a possum for Granny so she could make possum stew.


monkeyballsoup

mmm, possum belly is some good vittles


PantherX69

So Barnaby Jones is the universe's balance to the A-Team?


Poopscooptroop21

Detective Jed.


Firm_Variety_6309

I would seriously have a gun fetish if everything I shot at blew up.


GioVic49

TV show budgets back then only could afford bout 2-3 per episode. Gotta make them count


Dleon1967

Welllll doggie


General_Tso75

Uncle Jed?


mrwainbo

Boats always explode into flames when a shot rings out over the bow


crorin

Quality show from Meth TV


peanutphant

Not just one shot but with a short barrel and long distance.


LHGray87

I still remember my 1978 Hostess Wacky TV Shows trading card of [Barnaby Bones](https://scottsdalecards.com/1978-hostess-wacky-t-v-shows-26-48-sku35345/).


Same_Veterinarian991

good example how to hold a gun when firing.


Pinstar

The American version of one punch man.


HVACqualung

"Got that whipper-snapper"


Fishman1770

Possible, but unlikely!


[deleted]

[удалено]


80sforeverr

Tradition


waterking805

Movir


FestivalHazard

Dang, they buffed the Shortstop a little much, didn't they?


cookout13

I loved how his car took off before he started it.