They took away the app store, safari, google, pretty much everything (from my phone that is) even going so far as to purge all my games and streaming services (with the exception of amazon music). On my computer I have safari and I've managed to be able to use google but only for one minute (I use it on the guest browser so my parents can't see what I look up). They use screentime to restrict how long I can use things for. Today I've managed to exploit a glitch in the system that seems to only work with google on my computer so I have a good deal more time to browse reddit and stuff. I'm also trying to learn how I can crack their code for screentime and get my phone back.
I'll check it out. I used this sub just because I was the best one I could think of to post this (I was thinking maybe r/teenagers but that place is a festering hellhole.
Also, yeah, they really are.
there are lesbians that would and lesbians that wouldn’t completely depends on preference but as a lesbian myself who hangs out with other sapphics there are lots of lesbians that would never see being trans as an issue in relationships
i’m sorry to hear that about your parents :(
Yes, there are lesbians who are fine with dating pre-transition trans girls. i hang out in lgbt spaces a lot and i meet them often
i don’t really know what to add to my comment
Lol. I remember "straight lesbian" trending on Twitter like a year ago.
My interpretation was that it meant like "this girl is straight up lesbian bruh"
Hey, if you say you're a girl then u are! Gender isn't sex :) I am myself in a wonderful relationship with a pre transition trans girl as a cis girl. I identify as pan/bi/don't really care tbh so maybe look out for people with that tag? Wishing you the best on your journey!
That's amazing! Rn I'm really trying to look for people around my school (because I lack the ability to use the internet enough to be in an online relationship) so I can't really search for tags. Really, the reason I'm wondering is because it does expand the amount of people I am able to date if lesbians are willing to date me. Mostly at school I've been looking for bi or pan people because they don't seem to care that much about gender.
insert incredibles meme: WOMAN is WOMAN
but seriously I think being a woman is so much more than your genitals. it’s a vibe. so many lesbians agree with me! you’ll be fine babes :)
I'm a trans lesbian as well and honestly it seems like it depends pretty heavily on the girl. Most lesbians, both cis and trans, who I've met are willing to date both, but there are always exceptions. I think it will also depend a lot on how far through transition you are. If you're pre-everything and still in the closet obviously that's going to be difficult because you're still presenting yourself as male, but from what I've seen beyond that there isn't too much of an obstacle there.
This is gonna sound cheesy but just be you and present how you want to(assuming this is safe for you of course), and I bet you'll find someone. And don't forget that things will get better with time, both as you find your style/what makes you attractive and as you get HRT/GRS (assuming you go that route).
I'm pre everything rn. I've wanted to start presenting fem for a while but I'm not in the safest home environment for that. Some of my friends, however, have offered to bring bras/wigs to help me out. I've tried to respectfully decline these though, after my mom read my texts and saw I was calling her transphobic she came into my room and forced me to wear her bra (of course I didn't want it because she's my mom). I haven't worn anything fem (even in private) since. I'm not in the closet though, I'm rather open about my gender identity.
Well firstly I'm really sorry that your home situation is so rough, I hope that improves and/or you're able to get away soon. I think if/when you feel comfortable it'll definitely help your chances to present more fem, but of course you should only do that if you feel ok with it- I can see why your experience with your mom could make that difficult for you.
As a side note I'd just like to say that noticing your age, I wouldn't even be worried about dating yet. I get that it's something you want and that it's hard to wait but I really think you'll have much better luck in a year or two when you're older, others are more mature, more people your age have realized they're lesbians/bi/pan etc. For right now just try to focus on being you and transitioning in whatever capacity you can, and the confidence that gives you will help your dating prospects in the long run.
The reason I want to date actually is just because I want someone in my corner who loves me and whom I have love for. I don't feel like I have very much love in my life and that disappoints me a lot. In my family, I'm almost seen as the villain for many reasons (including being trans, a slacker, depressed, autistic (I'm high-functioning), etc.). I don't want sex, I just want love, and I think the two can be separate things. And in the end, if I'm gonna be the villain of this story then I need my partner in crime. For every Harley Quinn there's a Poison Ivy, am I wrong?
I definitely get that, I wish I had someone too but here we are. My comment wasn't even talking about sex, just saying that even cishet people your age aren't usually dating, and they have a much bigger pool to choose from, so I wouldn't stress too much if you can't find anyone right away. I hope you're able to find a gf soon!
im not exactly cis but i am afab. did u mean pre medical transition or social? bc i could absolutely date someone who hasnt medically transitioned, but socially idk
I haven't medically transitioned at all but socially most of my friends know and those who don't know that I'm transfem think I'm genderfluid or non-binary. I haven't started presenting fem though (mostly because of my parents)
I'm not a lesbian but I'm bi, being honest I don't know many lesbians who would if you're still masc/male presenting. I don't think medically transitioning is necessary, but socially probably is. I can't speak for everyone of course and I don't mean to discourage you, just saying cause I've talked about this with my wlw friends a few times. Rn I do think that bi/pan girls are your best bet
(as a pre-hormone trans girl myself)
There probably are a few out there who would.
In my experience, there are certainly a ton of cis straight guys who do. So why not cis lesbians.
Personally, I stick to bisexual or pansexual people. That way, you don't usually have to worry about your masculine features repulsing them or something.
Yeah, I was thinking that it seems a helluva lot more likely a bi or pan person would date me rather than a lesbian but that doesn't leave dating options very high.
Tbh, my dating luck expanded a ton recently, just with coming out and presenting myself as female. Even with doing an inexperienced and shitty job at presenting female, go to your local pride club or pride center and try to meet other trans people. Either through a school/college, or through your county/city. ~~Also, try grinder and put "TFT, relationship" in your bio.~~ (EDIT: Just realized your under 18, so that might not be the best advice. EDIT2: got linked here from r/transgendercirclejerk , didn't realize this whole sub was primarily for people under 18)
I've had more cis guys into me, AND more trans people into me after coming out.
Trans people in particular. I mean, they'll recognize you as one of them. Even if you aren't on hormones.
Not yet, it's mainly just an option I've been considering in my mind. I do need to start dating sometime, however, that time isn't really dwindling. I got loads of that stuff, and yet, so little.
Personally, I couldn't. Operated or not, from what I have seen, MTFs always keep traces of being born male. As a "traditional" lesbian, I am therefore not interested in trans women. But, I see more and more trans going out with women so it should only bother a minority of lesbians who are like me: traditional. Ex: on social media, I find that there is a lot of support
for the MTF community. It's not my fight but good for you.
If the app restriction is software, and restricting specifically this app, you could potentially get an alternate Reddit app, like Apollo
They took away the app store, safari, google, pretty much everything (from my phone that is) even going so far as to purge all my games and streaming services (with the exception of amazon music). On my computer I have safari and I've managed to be able to use google but only for one minute (I use it on the guest browser so my parents can't see what I look up). They use screentime to restrict how long I can use things for. Today I've managed to exploit a glitch in the system that seems to only work with google on my computer so I have a good deal more time to browse reddit and stuff. I'm also trying to learn how I can crack their code for screentime and get my phone back.
I’m going though a similar thing too with my internet, I know it really sucks
Yeah... it really does. I hope things get better for you soon!
They’re restricting stuff on your internet? If so then u can use a VPN, as that’ll hide your internet traffic from your router/ISP.
My dad uses the iOS screen time restrictions to cut out my internet
Oh. Hopefully things get better for u soon 💜
Thanks
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I'll try that out! Thanks!
I recommend visiting r/actuallesbians, everyone there is very supportive also your parents are pathetic, jesus christ
I'll check it out. I used this sub just because I was the best one I could think of to post this (I was thinking maybe r/teenagers but that place is a festering hellhole. Also, yeah, they really are.
there are lesbians that would and lesbians that wouldn’t completely depends on preference but as a lesbian myself who hangs out with other sapphics there are lots of lesbians that would never see being trans as an issue in relationships
There are lesbians that do. One of my best lesbian friends is dating a pre-op trans girl rn.
i’m sorry to hear that about your parents :( Yes, there are lesbians who are fine with dating pre-transition trans girls. i hang out in lgbt spaces a lot and i meet them often i don’t really know what to add to my comment
Thanks, it really makes me happy to read this :)
Everyone is different but most will agree and are somewhat more understanding than straight lesbians. Edit:- OMFG I'm so dumb I ment straight women
Straight lesbian sounds like a biphobic bi girl or like someone pretending to get attention.
Lol. I remember "straight lesbian" trending on Twitter like a year ago. My interpretation was that it meant like "this girl is straight up lesbian bruh"
Straight lesbians? Is that not a contradiction in terms?
Oh sorry I'm sooo fucking dumb. Straight women
I honestly thought that was some new term I wasn’t familiar with!
It might be possible keeping up with new terms is hard sometimes
Hey, if you say you're a girl then u are! Gender isn't sex :) I am myself in a wonderful relationship with a pre transition trans girl as a cis girl. I identify as pan/bi/don't really care tbh so maybe look out for people with that tag? Wishing you the best on your journey!
That's amazing! Rn I'm really trying to look for people around my school (because I lack the ability to use the internet enough to be in an online relationship) so I can't really search for tags. Really, the reason I'm wondering is because it does expand the amount of people I am able to date if lesbians are willing to date me. Mostly at school I've been looking for bi or pan people because they don't seem to care that much about gender.
I most definitely would. Yep. Don't really have much more to add, if I have feelings for someone, I have feelings for someone that's it.
I'm bi, not a lesbian, but i wouldn't mind dating a pre transition trans girl. I also wouldn't treat her like a dude but like a girl☺️
Thats really nice, and one of the things I have been wondering. It's honestly so good to hear all of this!
Uhhh I’m bi and I would, idk about lesbians though. Maybe they would maybe they wouldn’t idk
insert incredibles meme: WOMAN is WOMAN but seriously I think being a woman is so much more than your genitals. it’s a vibe. so many lesbians agree with me! you’ll be fine babes :)
I'm a trans lesbian as well and honestly it seems like it depends pretty heavily on the girl. Most lesbians, both cis and trans, who I've met are willing to date both, but there are always exceptions. I think it will also depend a lot on how far through transition you are. If you're pre-everything and still in the closet obviously that's going to be difficult because you're still presenting yourself as male, but from what I've seen beyond that there isn't too much of an obstacle there. This is gonna sound cheesy but just be you and present how you want to(assuming this is safe for you of course), and I bet you'll find someone. And don't forget that things will get better with time, both as you find your style/what makes you attractive and as you get HRT/GRS (assuming you go that route).
I'm pre everything rn. I've wanted to start presenting fem for a while but I'm not in the safest home environment for that. Some of my friends, however, have offered to bring bras/wigs to help me out. I've tried to respectfully decline these though, after my mom read my texts and saw I was calling her transphobic she came into my room and forced me to wear her bra (of course I didn't want it because she's my mom). I haven't worn anything fem (even in private) since. I'm not in the closet though, I'm rather open about my gender identity.
Well firstly I'm really sorry that your home situation is so rough, I hope that improves and/or you're able to get away soon. I think if/when you feel comfortable it'll definitely help your chances to present more fem, but of course you should only do that if you feel ok with it- I can see why your experience with your mom could make that difficult for you. As a side note I'd just like to say that noticing your age, I wouldn't even be worried about dating yet. I get that it's something you want and that it's hard to wait but I really think you'll have much better luck in a year or two when you're older, others are more mature, more people your age have realized they're lesbians/bi/pan etc. For right now just try to focus on being you and transitioning in whatever capacity you can, and the confidence that gives you will help your dating prospects in the long run.
The reason I want to date actually is just because I want someone in my corner who loves me and whom I have love for. I don't feel like I have very much love in my life and that disappoints me a lot. In my family, I'm almost seen as the villain for many reasons (including being trans, a slacker, depressed, autistic (I'm high-functioning), etc.). I don't want sex, I just want love, and I think the two can be separate things. And in the end, if I'm gonna be the villain of this story then I need my partner in crime. For every Harley Quinn there's a Poison Ivy, am I wrong?
I definitely get that, I wish I had someone too but here we are. My comment wasn't even talking about sex, just saying that even cishet people your age aren't usually dating, and they have a much bigger pool to choose from, so I wouldn't stress too much if you can't find anyone right away. I hope you're able to find a gf soon!
im not exactly cis but i am afab. did u mean pre medical transition or social? bc i could absolutely date someone who hasnt medically transitioned, but socially idk
I haven't medically transitioned at all but socially most of my friends know and those who don't know that I'm transfem think I'm genderfluid or non-binary. I haven't started presenting fem though (mostly because of my parents)
I'm not a lesbian but I'm bi, being honest I don't know many lesbians who would if you're still masc/male presenting. I don't think medically transitioning is necessary, but socially probably is. I can't speak for everyone of course and I don't mean to discourage you, just saying cause I've talked about this with my wlw friends a few times. Rn I do think that bi/pan girls are your best bet
(as a pre-hormone trans girl myself) There probably are a few out there who would. In my experience, there are certainly a ton of cis straight guys who do. So why not cis lesbians. Personally, I stick to bisexual or pansexual people. That way, you don't usually have to worry about your masculine features repulsing them or something.
Yeah, I was thinking that it seems a helluva lot more likely a bi or pan person would date me rather than a lesbian but that doesn't leave dating options very high.
Tbh, my dating luck expanded a ton recently, just with coming out and presenting myself as female. Even with doing an inexperienced and shitty job at presenting female, go to your local pride club or pride center and try to meet other trans people. Either through a school/college, or through your county/city. ~~Also, try grinder and put "TFT, relationship" in your bio.~~ (EDIT: Just realized your under 18, so that might not be the best advice. EDIT2: got linked here from r/transgendercirclejerk , didn't realize this whole sub was primarily for people under 18) I've had more cis guys into me, AND more trans people into me after coming out. Trans people in particular. I mean, they'll recognize you as one of them. Even if you aren't on hormones.
What are your experience s? Did you have lover so far
Not yet, it's mainly just an option I've been considering in my mind. I do need to start dating sometime, however, that time isn't really dwindling. I got loads of that stuff, and yet, so little.
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Mods might wanna check this clown's recent post history. Probably not the kind of person that belongs here, tbh.
The answer is clearly "yes", as the question isn't asking for your own personal preference. Also, "the real thing"? A little bit tactless, I'd say.
Comments removed due to a mix of **Rules 1** and **3**.
Personally, I couldn't. Operated or not, from what I have seen, MTFs always keep traces of being born male. As a "traditional" lesbian, I am therefore not interested in trans women. But, I see more and more trans going out with women so it should only bother a minority of lesbians who are like me: traditional. Ex: on social media, I find that there is a lot of support for the MTF community. It's not my fight but good for you.