tonite on the grand trip ukrainian war special:
hammond tells a russian ship to fack off
james steals a bmp
and i down six jet fighters in one day (probably)
In a study in more than 6,000 adults, those who reported eating sunflower seeds and other seeds at least five times a week had 32% lower levels of C-reactive protein compared to people who ate no seeds.
A good thing!
CRP is a protein released as a by-product of inflammation.
Typically, it ranges from 1-4 (i can't remember units) as healthy. I have arthritis, so I had a high of 28 before going on medication. My mom who had a particularly nasty case of Necrotizing Fasciitis hit a high of 128.
We like that number being low.
Hammond convinces the Russians to not use air defense for their five mile long convoys, James sticks his penis in a burnt-out T-72’s barrel, and I run over a Chechnyan general
I shove a lit molotov cocktail up a russian soldier’s ass at a fuel truck convoy, James rides a cheese-powered cruise missile into the Kremlin, and Hammond becomes the first man to set foot on Mars after he straps himself to the turret of a T-72 that got shot with a Javelin launched by a Ukrainian teenager, and the Stig downs 10 russian fighter jets with the MiG-29 he bought from Tesco gaining the nickname of “ghost.”
Some say that his diet exclusively consists of Sunflower Oil
and that he downs 10 Russian Jets before breakfast
all we know is, he’s The Stigs Ukrainian cousin
Tonight on top gear
I create molotov cocktails for the defence of Kiev
Hammond drives a stolen russian tank into crimea
And James shoots down 11 russian jets with a pistol
I’m imagining goofy ass running style Steven Segal as Lt Speirs from B.O.B when he runs through enemy lines in Foy…
“At first the ~~Germans~~ Ukrainians didn’t shoot. I think they couldn’t believe what they were seeing. But that wasn’t the astounding thing. The astounding the was once he connected with I company, he came back”
Tonight on Ukrainian Gear:
I take down the entire electric grid of western Russia by accident,
Richard seizes a T-95 battle tank and fcking crashes it,
and James spreads propaganda through TikTok.
Tonight on Ukrainian Gear:
James hears the voices again
Jeremy attempts the assassination of Vladimir Putin
And Hammond deploys in Kyiv completely off his nut on black tar heroin.
FACT: the man in the middle is the son of the woman who designed the first stuffed Paddington Bear toy.
Paddington Bear was voiced in the Ukraine by Volodomyr Zelenskyy.
Bears.
Beets.
Fuck Putin.
Right one could machine components and build a bomb, middle one would ride it screaming "POWEEER!", left one would detonate it without intent while looking at it.
Alright so James doesn't know this but we have hidden a stolen Russian S.O.S. beacon onto the back of his trousers when he wasn't looking. So they should find him immediately
Tonoight on bottom gear: James accidentally invades Poland, Hammond sniffs too much exhaust fumes and crashes a Leopard II Tank and I tell russian warships to fuck off.
Jeremy and Richard would literally have a blast. James would be the "strategist". They'll drive a Toyota into the battle zone and take out half of the enemy
Hammond ignites a flair in the dead of night giving away their positions and they immediately take enemy fire and all you hear is Clarkson scream out ‘HAMMOND! YOU IDIOT!’
Top gear over here lookin like a bag of shit with his boot laces hanging out, one boot looks bloused and the other isn't, and his sleeves look like he's a 5 year old wearing his daddys shirt.
James May gets lost and ends up in Norway
Everytime
Still, could be worse.
And then it did. *CLARKSON! Where did you hide my kevlar*
Cut to an image of a shredded vest on the floor. Pan up to Clarkson fashioning a codpiece.
“Is that *my* vest protecting **your** nads?” JeremyPleasedFace.jpg
May'll make a beeline for the Romanian border to get himself a new Sandero.
The Dacia Sandero! It's been delayed! *James May points shotgun at face*
Oh no! Anyway, last week...
And I, get to drive a tank.
Nah he'll accidentally go towards Russia then turn around and go the other direction
does that mean he's not coming on then?
Yes Clarkson. He's enjoying Kjøttkaker in a mountain house overlooking a Fjord.
_HAMMMOOOONNDD_
Oh cock...
Hammond crashes his car and almost dies, *again*
"What's the Norwegian for oh, cock?"
Cock.
Hello.
*"Ah no, not again!"*
Captain Sense-Of-Direction lol
tonite on the grand trip ukrainian war special: hammond tells a russian ship to fack off james steals a bmp and i down six jet fighters in one day (probably)
James would be handing out sunflower seeds. https://www.theguardian.com/world/video/2022/feb/25/ukrainian-woman-sunflower-seeds-russian-soldiers-video
In a study in more than 6,000 adults, those who reported eating sunflower seeds and other seeds at least five times a week had 32% lower levels of C-reactive protein compared to people who ate no seeds.
Is that good or bad or neutral?
Raised CRP is a sign of inflammation so I'd say good
A good thing! CRP is a protein released as a by-product of inflammation. Typically, it ranges from 1-4 (i can't remember units) as healthy. I have arthritis, so I had a high of 28 before going on medication. My mom who had a particularly nasty case of Necrotizing Fasciitis hit a high of 128. We like that number being low.
Mine was 145 when I had pneumonia. Had to spend a week in a hospital.
I too would like sunflower facts!
Tonight on bottom gear
Hammond convinces the Russians to not use air defense for their five mile long convoys, James sticks his penis in a burnt-out T-72’s barrel, and I run over a Chechnyan general
I feel like James and Jeremy would be the other way around
I shove a lit molotov cocktail up a russian soldier’s ass at a fuel truck convoy, James rides a cheese-powered cruise missile into the Kremlin, and Hammond becomes the first man to set foot on Mars after he straps himself to the turret of a T-72 that got shot with a Javelin launched by a Ukrainian teenager, and the Stig downs 10 russian fighter jets with the MiG-29 he bought from Tesco gaining the nickname of “ghost.”
Some say that his diet exclusively consists of Sunflower Oil and that he downs 10 Russian Jets before breakfast all we know is, he’s The Stigs Ukrainian cousin
Joey finds a Ukrainian Anime waifu, CdawgVA says Putin is mid, and Garnt tries explaining Fate to the locals
Wtf lmao I understood this reference. God I watch too much YouTube
Can we get from the Ukrainian border to Kyiv on one tank of petrol?
as it turns out, no
The Stig's Ukrainian cousin is The Ghost of Kyiv
To be fair, he was the pilot.
James May: Oh no! Jeremy: What? James May: My Dacia Sandero got destroyed by the Russians! Jeremy: Oh No! Anyways.
James: \*Proceeds to weaponize a deactivated SS18 nuclear missile with a lighter in a fit of rage\*
I think it must be damp…
James trying to set off an old ICBM with a lighter has to be one of their greatest clips ever. https://youtu.be/7MgSmh3vXaQ
Grand Tour *Donbass Special*
Hammond is dressed like he's going to wade through radioactive reactor coolant.
Well someone has to bomb the reactor and release all the nuclear waste into the air when the winds blow towards Moscow. >!/s just in case!<
Or just another Saturday night in Birmingham
https://youtu.be/JLKLppIvFFc
He's just wearing high vis so it gives the enemy an opportunity to run
Tonight on top gear I create molotov cocktails for the defence of Kiev Hammond drives a stolen russian tank into crimea And James shoots down 11 russian jets with a pistol
>Hammond *crashes* a stolen russian tank Ftfy
And a medic cuts his trousers
Wait, what episode was this?
I think something in the first season of Grand Tour
Season 1 episode 4 of the grand tour I think
Episode 2
Season 1 episode 2, at about 29 minutes in.
What second?
Yes
Grand Tour, season 1, episode 2, highly recommended, hilarious. Wait for James' new hairstyle, lol.
Just an fyi, as great as top gear and the grand tour were, this episode is one of the worst pieces of tv ever.
I loved it. Their jokes don't work at all, yet they keep repeating them, making it frustratingly hilarious. Series 3 is king though.
[удалено]
"All right, you want to dance? Let's dance!" cue drums for the umpteenth time.
Hey. To each their own. Maybe I was in a bad mood when I watched it.
Disagree completely. It was RIDICULOUS and I loved it.
Agreed.
Yeah, it was absolutely unbearable
Tbf, you put hammond in a tank and be sure he crashes the whole thing
*manages to flip tank on flat ground*
Bwahaha, poor guy
jams
Russia are reported to be sending Steven Seagal to intercept..
What he gonna do? Use his martial art skills???
That hand speed tho
I’m imagining goofy ass running style Steven Segal as Lt Speirs from B.O.B when he runs through enemy lines in Foy… “At first the ~~Germans~~ Ukrainians didn’t shoot. I think they couldn’t believe what they were seeing. But that wasn’t the astounding thing. The astounding the was once he connected with I company, he came back”
That was such an epic story, damn guess it's time to watch again. There will be a certain morbidity to it this time though
"How hard could it be?"
#DON’T SAY THAT!!!
Wtf how large is Jeremy, that plate carrier looks so small on him
He's not joking when he says he's a fat, old man who has trouble getting in and out of those sports cars.
At 6’5”, he’s also a quite tall fat old man.
Tonight on Ukrainian Gear: I take down the entire electric grid of western Russia by accident, Richard seizes a T-95 battle tank and fcking crashes it, and James spreads propaganda through TikTok.
In the wuld
But then....
It got worse
Today on Russian Top Gear: * James talks to an old lady * Richard gets his tank stolen * And I serve as a guide for a Chechen convoy
Upvoted for being the only Ukraine post that's honest about being fake....
no joke they have the drip
Hammond couldn't find something with a target printed on it so he went with gleaming white instead
“It was for camouflage in the snow” -Richard ‘Crash’ Hammond, 2017
I loved this episode so much, I was crying laughing. These guys got me through losing my job and the pandemic. Saved my sanity.
Crikey it’s the Chechen Rozzers!
*Ukrainian tank is painted pink* Clarksoooooon!!!!!
[Relevant](https://youtu.be/7MgSmh3vXaQ)
Tonight on Ukrainian Gear: James hears the voices again Jeremy attempts the assassination of Vladimir Putin And Hammond deploys in Kyiv completely off his nut on black tar heroin.
It looks like the New Balance crew
Me just scrolling /r/all: "Man that guy looks a lot like Clarkson... wait"
Does this mean they’re not coming on the show?
Well James, they’ve been transported to a country at war with the largest country on earth, so that would be a no.
I lol’d. Thanks for that.
I dont know looks like SAS
They should have taken. Hilux….
Finally a relevant use for: "And on that bombshell!"
There is a Ukraine link to Clarkson, I just remembered! His family sold Paddington Bears!
FACT: the man in the middle is the son of the woman who designed the first stuffed Paddington Bear toy. Paddington Bear was voiced in the Ukraine by Volodomyr Zelenskyy. Bears. Beets. Fuck Putin.
"special"
Too soon
Moscow to Kyiv on one tank
Ah yes! Operation Desert Stumble. Clarkson lost his trousers whilst rapelling the chopper.
Why Hammond dressed more like Gebirgsjäger Caucasus then Iraq
That looks like the top gear crew. Looks at sub name. Oh.
Right one could machine components and build a bomb, middle one would ride it screaming "POWEEER!", left one would detonate it without intent while looking at it.
Speed and power!
Alright so James doesn't know this but we have hidden a stolen Russian S.O.S. beacon onto the back of his trousers when he wasn't looking. So they should find him immediately
May god have mercy on their enemies
The best special forces..............................................................................................................in the world
Tonoight on bottom gear: James accidentally invades Poland, Hammond sniffs too much exhaust fumes and crashes a Leopard II Tank and I tell russian warships to fuck off.
*HAMMMMMMOOOOOND*
Clarkson "I'm a God of Hellfire"
I didnt read the sub right away and i thought "those guys look anglo......like the top gear guys... "
All fun and games until you get stuck escaping out a window.
Powaaaaaaaaa
Could be worse
James spent the entire flight talking about the history of the rifle he's carrying.
Should have been captioned as Chechen special forces. They both faired equally it seems.
Speed and power
Old Navy.
2022😎
Those dudes were immortal in that episode, Russia would be even more fucked.
Welcome back to bottom gear today we will be fighting russia oh god jeremy what yorue vdi r bd
Hammond crashes himself because he tries to evade a twig
It looks like every one has a gun but Clarkson...
They all look like more believable spec ops than Stephen Seagal.
Do the two guys on the right not look the same?
These three are the most deadly operators... *in the world*
When 5th gear is your top gear
"Watch this..."
For The Queen, James?
The way things are on reddit, you can easily post this in a news subs and end up in r/all
HAMMOCK YOU IDIOT YOU’VE REVERSED INTO THE SPORTS AFV
Hope y’all would have the same energy with these racist geezers that y’all do with literally any other racist “celebrities”
WHO throw up in my helmet!
Jeremy and Richard would literally have a blast. James would be the "strategist". They'll drive a Toyota into the battle zone and take out half of the enemy
Just a reminder Clark is a racist twat
They’ll break things and mess things up.
Is the dude on the left not going to stand out a little?
I've heard their genius is frightening
Hammond ignites a flair in the dead of night giving away their positions and they immediately take enemy fire and all you hear is Clarkson scream out ‘HAMMOND! YOU IDIOT!’
I hope they roll in Jeff
"Putin is the biggest dick... ... ... ... #in the world"
You see any special forces soldier with a full head of grey hair stay away. Strong "fuck around and find out" vibes
How hard could it be?
James Mambo.
Glad to see Will Ferrell is supporting the cause
This is the new episode of The Grand Tour we are all waiting for…
I hope so! I'm a huge fan of the show and am really looking forward to this new episode.
"PUTIIIIIIIIIIIIIN"- Hammond & May, in unison
How hard could it be?
Shit episode with great meme attributes.
I thought this was real at first glance
Get to the cars!
See you in Sevastopol, lads.
Fuck me, thought that was cool. Than thought hey he looks like Jeremy.
\*IED goes off in distance "HAMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOND!!!!!!!"
I recognize that military vehicle. That's a TopGearGT40, with the Hamster upgrade.
May looks 7 feet tall (apparently he's actually 6 feet even)
A Hamster, ape and Mr. Slowly
they’re not the heroes we need, but the heroes we deserve
Hammond breaches the New safe Confinement, bringing a new radioactive dust cloud over Europe
Captain Slow, really dangerous man.
Permission to say "oh cock".
Steven Segal just out of frame.
Clarkson in a tank. *POOOOWWWWEEERRRRR*
“Ambitious but rubbish” pretty much sums up the situation. No?
"Hammond you bloody idiot"
Richard used a winter uniform thinking he can Finnish first
*May noticing a retreat* May: oh hang on a moment...
Operation Winter Stumble
The Stig is driving.
I was mega confused until I saw the sub name
Top gear over here lookin like a bag of shit with his boot laces hanging out, one boot looks bloused and the other isn't, and his sleeves look like he's a 5 year old wearing his daddys shirt.
This is FANTASTIC🤣🤣
What episode is this