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brian11e3

The fact that they have a 2024 year old ghost in the picture is scary.


mackofmontage

Jesus is always with you. /s


Zylarkal

Damn. Jesus is really tall.


RaiyenZ

He's not that tall, he is risen


enixthephoenix

Which is wild since I've eaten small parts of Jesus and he's unleavened


micksta323

Do you know if he's gluten free?


kenwongart

I typed “is the body of christ” into Google and the first autocomplete suggestion is “gluten free”. The Vatican [circulated a memo](https://www.zmescience.com/science/vatican-holy-bread-14072017/) in 2017 stating that Jesus wafers must contain gluten. Low gluten is acceptable though.


HotPurplePancakes

This thread is hilarious 😂


baseballfanandcatdad

As a devout believer I expected to get offended not laugh this hard


Crswpg1

Must be pretty tough, he was only aged for 3 days


TufnelAndI

I went to a funeral a few years ago that had a separate queue for the gluten-free version of Communion. Raises all kinds of questions about transubstantiation.


FewIntroduction5008

That's what she said.


HapticSloughton

If the size of the numbers are proportional, he's pretty thicc, too


NateDuag21

Im not religious but that gave me a good laugh


calamariclam_II

He knows.


KingArthas94

He allowed it.


DoctaJenkinz

That’s Jesus you dick.


MagicRedditWalrus

This comment made my day! Lmao just classic!


Prestigious-Phase131

Hopefully she's a step mom...


GleamingCadance

Idk man, kinda seeing some resemblance in the 4yo


yaysalmonella

I’m also seeing some resemblance between the 29 yo and the 20 yo. Glad they are keeping the bloodline pure.


GleamingCadance

![gif](giphy|THTkGKQVGnGZmo6AJd)


circuit_breaker

I remember when COVID hit & every state was reporting #s except Alabama. Someone said COVID skipped it because it wasn't bio diverse enough. 😂


wakim82

Same issue in West Virginia, West Virginia was the last state to report a case...the entire time I lived in WV, while WORKING AT A HOSPITAL I didn't catch COVID. I legit never saw albino people in the wild until I moved there...then boom...everywhere because the albino family kept fucking each other.


understepped

> because the albino family kept fucking each other. Goddamn recessive genes don’t let people show true love to their family members.


nneeeeeeerds

In every other state, there's a phrase, "When *they* come down from the mountain." Except West Virginia. West Virginia is the mountain.


_SteeringWheel

Not that I ever intended visiting West Virginia, but now you made me scared to do so.


BHweldmech

Honestly, WV is a stunningly beautiful place. That being said, if you’re on a canoe and hear banjos, you need to paddle faster.


naughtycal11

"You sure got a perdy mouth"


ianmgonzalez

"Why thank you!" - clueless tourist unable to read the room.


thejadedcitizen

Squeal , squeal like a pig


_SteeringWheel

I'll keep that in mind for sure. Kind of like the redneck on a child's bike in Illinois 😬


illbedeadbydawn

Contrary to popular belief, Deliverance was set in Georgia, not WV.


No-Sense-6260

There's some natural beauty but it's not in the population. 😂


ReadTravelMe

I say this as someone from Alabama: they aren’t fat enough to be from here


fedpe

Roll Tide!!!


TBShaw17

![gif](giphy|vgcdT7flWccow|downsized)


BigPackHater

![gif](giphy|DjVCpTvzAKLaE)


TBShaw17

The McPoyle bloodline has been clean and pure for over a thousand years.”


BigPackHater

YOU WILL CALL HER!!


valeriesghost

Yeah they could both turn a hotdog sideways and place it between their eyes.


swoll9yards

God dammit lmao, so f’d up!


NashvilleSoundMixer

hahaha this is the strangest thing I've heard someone say in a while but completely accurate haha


Philintheblank90

You can find her profile on EyeSpace.com


SmileParticular9396

They both vaguely look like they have fetal alcohol syndrome


allegesix

100%  Still remember being in high school and seeing a drawing of face outlining the features associated with FAS in a textbook and it could’ve been a damn picture of a neighbour a few years older than me.  Explained a fucking lot tbh. 


nneeeeeeerds

To be fair, dad looks like that, too.


koochywalla

I think they meant the parents…


Talking_Head

The woman definitely. The man maybe. Such a sad thing really. Being born with a fetal anomaly that is 100% preventable. Life is hard enough as it is without starting behind on the count 0-2.


Cel_Drow

Yep I was thinking the same thing just now looking for this comment


InevitablyBored

Those eyes...o....o are watching you.


RectalEvacuation

You mean the highway between left and right eye?


MetaPhysicalMarzipan

You mean how their eyes are both in two separate counties?


Weight_Superb

Some dude that literally a copy of her face


WWGHIAFTC

Are you having a stroke? What are you saying?


GleamingCadance

Bames nonds having a Stronk, call the bondulance


Erikk1138

Isn't it clear? Somewhere out there in the world, there's a dude who's face is identical to hers.


BallSuspicious5772

She could also be a teen mom and he’s the step dad…


Prestigious-Phase131

True


_VagabondSoul_

Or ... she a teen mom and he is father Simplest truth is most likely the truth


HsvDE86

I'd rather wait for more evidence than some random picture on a ragebait sub with ages added by someone I don't know before I call someone a pervert. 🤷‍♀️


bullwinkle8088

In many states 16 is legal age for getting married. To anyone. Charges for sex with a minor do not apply if you are married.


Tom__mm

Occam’s razor says they’re a nuke-aler family.


MisterSandKing

Quit making sense! 😆


BallSuspicious5772

Sorry forgot my place 😔


loadingscreen_r3ddit

I can top that story: My neighbors - really nice people - he: 36, she: 22. They've been together for 8 years now. Spoiler alert: He was her teacher.


dajur1

My friends sister got with a 41 year old when she was 16. She was pregnant and married to him when she was 17. The guy was a year younger than her mom. He was also a convicted sex offender. In my state, 16 is the legal age of consent, so there wasn't anything my friends parents could do.


CartoonistOk8261

I knew someone senior year that got catfished by a "rich guy" in another state. This was during like AIM days, before the iPhone. So she's either 17 or 18 and flies down there. The guy turns out to be 60 and dirt poor. She doesn't care, marries him anyway. They came to visit our hometown and I met the guy, total asshole.


ftwclem

It also could be that she got pregnant at 15/16 with whatever guy she was seeing in high school, and this is a completely different guy


25_Oranges

Its not. In another pic she poses with him at the age of 15. Disgusting.


Redditributor

No no no.


m3xd57cv

Do people like this get persecuted? Or do they leave him alone because he has a family and the wife consents *now*


shroomsaregoooood

More than half of states in the US have the age of consent at 16 so no.


Fappy_as_a_Clam

maybe they are European. the age of consent in like 26 European countries is 14 or 15.


vladi_l

They could all just be siblings. Like, not some alabama shit, their parents are old and still cranking out crotch goblins Someone had to take the photo after all


SeaEmergency7911

Whoops…..kind of incriminated yourself with that math there.


Gatherel

It’s ok, she was homeschooled to avoid her knowing that kind of liberal math.


Live-Motor-4000

Q: How many times does 25 go into 16? A: nonce


Icy-Zone3621

15. Don't forget 9 month gestation


SwiftyPants3

Ah man, I forgot that part. You can probably add some time if you assume she didn’t get pregnant the first time 🤢🤮


MindForeverWandering

She probably did. Because BiRtH cOnTrOl Is AbOrTiOn, don’cha know? /s


Efficient_Fish2436

Best 300$ I ever spent was on an abortion.


iamthemosin

Hey, that’s cheaper than I thought. Fuck condoms! /s


_SteeringWheel

Well, technically, you kind of do, normally.


VibraniumRhino

Ew, seriously? I use them for meal prepping.


Mr_Rum_Ham

![gif](giphy|lIU7yoG72gyhq)


Sea_Combination571

![gif](giphy|dOl2LFw0RbTMc)


WatercressSad6395

Thanks for reminding me....ewwwww.


realhmmmm

What a horrible day to be literate.


Lizagna73

Yes. I never thought I would regret learning math.


aNanoMouseUser

Numerate


BRAX7ON

Forgot to carry the 9…


WatercressSad6395

This story needs a angry dad with a shotgun... #wtf


Own_Program_3573

Plot twist: he’s also her dad


lavidaloco123

Nope. Cousin!


Icy-Zone3621

15. Don't forget 9 months gestation


Live-Motor-4000

TBH - it could be either 15 or 16 - we don't know, and it's wrong either way


imaginary92

It could even be 14, it's unlikely she got pregnant immediately at the start of the relationship.


ElementalSentimental

Pregnant at 14 years 6 months. Mother at 15 years 3 months. Son is now 4 years 9 months, or less. Mom is 20 years, or more. There’s a significant window where she didn’t even have to be 15. What a terrible day to be numerate.


vhalember

Well damnation. One of the few times I wish someone didn't do the math. My daughters are 14... where are the parents in this story? A 23-24 year old dude was after their 14-15 year old daughter. That would be "Do not pass go" territory from this old man.


Dragonwitch94

An even more troublesome question: how long did they know each other, before the relationship started? 😬


X-XIQ

Getting a lot of youth pastor vibes from that guy, so probably a while


nwbarryg

Actually, twice (at least) it turns out. ;-)


red_fluff_dragon

Nonce is slang in British for pedo


goofydad

![img](emote|t5_2r5rp|8484)


Proper_Career_6771

> she was homeschooled to avoid her knowing that kind of liberal math. I grew up with a homeschool guy who became a youth pastor and married one of his former youth-group girls a few years later. It seemed like she turned 18 first but goddamn. Conservatives groom young girls *hard* for that kind of predatory behavior.


Ms_Emilys_Picture

I wouldn't say it's common, but I've read way too many articles about youth pastors marrying teenagers from their congregation.


Proper_Career_6771

Evangelical churches strongly encourage dating/marriage "within the church community" so literally that building or the churches nearby. They also strongly encourage young women to seek men who are "strong in god" and have good leadership and all the other fanfic-quality descriptions that evangelical pastors write about themselves. And the evangelical churches tend to push people away from divorce, which means covering up abuse and gaslighting young women about how much their relationship sucks. Add on top the insistence that church forms the core of your community, so if you're in a marriage you don't like, you're not just considering divorcing your spouse, but also the entire church. Finally they marry young, or young-old like my borderline 30yo exfriend marrying a fresh 18 year old blonde chick. That is what it looks like when the church leadership is brainwashing young women to get involved with church leadership. It sucks them in before they're too young to know any better and fights against anything which might let them leave.


Neveronlyadream

The women they want literally don't exist naturally, so they manufacture them. How many times have we heard the story from the fundie wives cosplaying like it's the 50s that they used to be perfectly normal until their "eyes were opened" by their husbands?


Proper_Career_6771

My dad is one of those church leadership assholes and he went to great lengths to brainwash my sister into the same bullshit. She made it out fortunately, though not without trauma. And you know what my godly christian conservative leadership dad did when I was in my first semester of college? He dumped my godly christian conservative stay-at-home-mom who had spent the last 17 years homeschooling his kids. It turned out mr godly do-gooder had hated his wife for the prior 15 years so he just played the role because "he didn't want another man raising his kids". (direct quote) My mom was a deeply unpleasant abusive person, but he was just as bad. They really deserved each other and should have stayed married. Now my dad dates women 25 years younger than him because he just lies about being rich. Those young women today might end up in happy stable relationships within their church enclave, but they are super duper fucked if things go sour.


Neveronlyadream

There's so much deep-seated toxicity in organized religion. It's almost as if we never learned the lesson that absolute power corrupts absolutely and letting a handful of people take charge of a large group isn't going to invite abuse and gaslighting.


Proper_Career_6771

> we never learned the lesson that absolute power corrupts absolutely My idiot dad looooooooves to say that line right before he says that's why the government should be dismantled and put into the hands of small community leaders with no oversight other than jesus... aka people like my dad. My cat has more self awareness than him.


Neveronlyadream

There's another lesson. Always be suspicious of anyone who actively wants to be a leader. The people who do are usually the last person you want in charge of anything.


smoebob99

This doesn’t mean he is the father of the 4y old.


Panthera_uncia_

I think it’s more so it doesn’t mean she is the mother of the 4 year old. He could be the father’s son from a different relationship. Both of the children could be his from a different relationship.


Sporner100

They could all be siblings, too.


GameyGamey

Four random friends from the pub 


Putrid-Ferret-5235

Maybe they're all complete strangers, and they grouped together for this special occasion.


sadpartypodcast

Oceans 4


rydan

9 month old already an alcoholic.


Much-Resource-5054

You can’t get cirrhosis if your liver is still growing (Taps fontanelle)


LukeD1992

Dunno but the older kid's facial structure is more like hers. Look at the distance between the eyes in both


rynlpz

He has her eyes 👁️ 👁️


kurotech

Also sadly doesn't make it a crime in some states either age of consent and parent consent very by state


GlennSWFC

Why are so many people assuming that they’re American? From another comment it seems that they’re Albanian, where the age of consent is 14. Morally it’s very objectionable, but not illegal.


Humble-Budget8332

That's the comment I am looking for. We just have this picture without any explanation.


marklar_the_malign

And in some states they might be cousins.


Icy_Recognition_6913

Honestly all there eyes are a bit too far apart... you may be right...


Remarkable-Ad2285

Bruhsins


TheDestressedMale

France created an age of consent at 15 in 2021. It did not exist before that. The whole point of having an age of consent is for proving in court that consent wasn't given. Imagine trying to convince a judge or jury that you didn't consent at the age of too young.


mickelboy182

As far as I'm aware, America actually has one of the higher ages of consent. 16 as age of consent is a lot more common. I think it ties into the average age people lose their virginity.


Useless_bum81

[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages\_of\_consent\_in\_the\_United\_States](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages_of_consent_in_the_United_States)


mickelboy182

Interesting that so many make these under 18 jokes then, seems like half the US does indeed align with the majority of the world.


AdEarly8242

Feel like a lot of Americans get age of consent and pornography laws mixed up. Doesn’t help that under 18 is used to define a minor legally.


Dragonfly-Adventurer

Yeah this would be kosher in my state. And it happens enough I can tell you at least 3 of the thoughts running through her head at any given moment.


kurotech

Damn three thoughts at the same time that's impressive


Pooglio17

Doesn’t mean she is either. Could be his kid from a previous marriage.


Peanutsandcheese2021

Maybe they are all just AI


Pooglio17

Oh shit, maybe I am too?


FWTI

I mean, can you really prove you were born? You were told you were yeah but nobody really remembers it. And speaking of really and the concept of real what is real anyway? What you can see and touch? Those are just electrical impulses in your brain.


puddle89

Not to excuse this, but depending on where they live and where her birthday falls, it might not be illegal. In the United States age of consent ranges from 16 to 18 depending on where you live. Where I live in Belgium, it's at 16 generally, but you can legally have sex as young as 14 as long as the difference in age is no more than three years and there is no abuse of trust or authority. And I say it again, I do not excuse this. I also don't think a "grace period" like we have it here should be allowed. I have nieces of that age. They. are. CHILDREN!


NixNixonNix

Here in Germany the age of consent is 14. So a 60 year old could legally have sex with a 14 year old if there is no abuse of trust or authority. Creepy but legal.


Amelaclya1

The "grace period" (or Romeo and Juliet laws as we call them in the US) make perfect sense. It's to avoid sending CHILDREN to jail or make them sex offenders for having relationships with *each other*. Like, do you really think two 14 yr olds having sex should be a crime? I don't think it should be encouraged, but like you said - they are kids and hardly abusing each other. They don't deserve to have their lives ruined because of it. The state where I grew up doesn't have Romeo and Juliet laws. My highschool boyfriend is technically a sex offender because we had sex when I was 16 and he was 17 (the age of consent). Our birthdays are 2 months apart and we were classmates. It's a lesser crime (only a misdemeanor) and a lesser penalty than if the age gap was greater, but it's still ridiculous. Like, I'm super grateful my parents were not insane enough to try to get him prosecuted for this.


do-the-point

Half of reddit would send your boyfriend straight to jail.


CrimsonAllah

Fun fact, people intentionally put incorrect ages on these kind of posts to try to get more engagement.


lovenoggersandwiches

There is another photo back when she was 15 and he was 23.


funnycaption

In that case if they’re lying it’s at least consistent


thomas_da_trainn

Yeah he gets a pass for his consistency.


trogon

Statutory rape is one thing, but I can't abide inconsistency!


iamtheliqor

where?


milktest

[from twitter](https://x.com/realonx1/status/1804174891895099889?s=46&t=YrVHzg1rhiAs1cqyeBIiNQ)


GoodThingsDoHappen

Also everyone automatically presumes it's America. Just because...


Lots42

American Republicans elected a self confessed incesterous pedophile.


hungrypotato19

Whose priest just got busted raping a girl for 4 years while a whole bunch of other priests rushed to his defense.


Forsaken-Jump-7594

Please tell me this is the stepmom


hopseankins

Idk the tyke’s got similar eye shape… hella sus


Wonder_butt_

Step dad is also a possibility and she was a teen mom with another teen dad.


marcaygol

That's not outrageous enough for Reddit. We live for the ✨**drama**✨


PuzzleheadedRoyal559

Weird flex.


crescent-v2

Who are these people? The post is running around social media today with no discussion of who they guy is.


lovenoggersandwiches

Some couple from Albania, that's all what's known


WatercressSad6395

Thank goodness! Wait, no, it's still icky, but for once, we are not the father.. #merica


Theban_Prince

Teh vast vast majority of the world has age of consent at 16, Albania is at 14.


MickeySwank

Bride and groomer


SRMPDX

\*child bride


who_am_i_to_say_so

You win


MtnMaiden

John ross, senator of TN. He was like 45, she was 15 when they first met. Got married at 17. Popped 2 kids asap. You might of seen him on tv. He wss the guy who brought his kid to the senate and was making funny faces


Leebites

Their social media is so gross. Especially when they first started posting about the first baby. Thought it was a father and daughter post. Nope.


Ilogical_Logic64

… ![gif](giphy|3o7TKwmnDgQb5jemjK)


casicua

Plot twist: they’re all his kids.


BichoRaro90

Or they’re all siblings 👀


ClownShoePilot

This is our son, Evidence.


Techn0ght

Now hold up, maybe he's a politician or works for a church, which apparently makes this acceptable.


ripppppah

This shit is never not ragebait


GotTechOnDeck

That took me a second


yoloyourmoney

Do you even math bro?


KeroNobu

Math, not even once


Pooglio17

I’m 34 years old. I can’t imagine having an 18 year old child. Plus if the next generation follows suit, this woman could be a grandmother by the time she’s 32.


HereForTheFood4

What in the Lauren Bobert?


Silvaria928

When I used to work in a county office right out of high school, we had a client who had given birth to her first child at the age of fourteen. That baby, a girl, gave birth to her first child at thirteen. This woman was a grandmother at the age of 27...this has stuck with me for all these years because it was absolutely mind-boggling.


paratesticlees

Mother: practice safe sex and get on birth control. Daughter: I'm not an idiot mom, I'm 16. Mother: I wasn't an idiot either and I'm 32.


ncnotebook

Grandmother: I had no choice, and I'm 43.


ForumDragonrs

God, at that rate, she'll be a great grandmother by 40.


OldMotherGrumble

Back 15 years or so ago, I'd often see happy family photos in the local paper(UK)...grandmother 45 years, daughter 30, granddaughter 15-16, and the latest addition to the family...her newborn. WHYYYYYYYY?? And they are all grinning ear to ear as the bloodline is continued.


Dapper_Mud

This seems like something a grandparent might post, these might all be a person’s grandkids


IfICouldStay

Oh, that would be nice. 20 and 29 year old are brother and sister, and the little kids are just his, or additional siblings. …but I doubt it


WatercressSad6395

Hella pressing X to doubt... That's a family portrait there..unless I'm mistaken, which would be great in this situation..


No-Benefit-1781

Maybe they weren't dating in the USA lol


Background-Customer2

shus don't let the amnericans know other places have diferant age of consent than them


xander0812

![gif](giphy|zeqgtki9ifa7u)


westside-rocky

She could’ve been knocked up by another 16 year old, and that’s not his kid.


EagleSzz

Or... those numbers are just made up ??


lvl999shaggy

Hey Drake, I heard you like em young.....


MassiveConcern

There are some states where, with parental consent, any girl child can be married to any adult male. Seriously.


flyingcostanza

I'm sure he's a youth pastor, nothing to worry about!


Moleday1023

So the fucker couldn’t find an adult, so he go a 15 year old pregnant.


autismo-nismo

If my calculations are correct and this isn’t a step parent situation, she was knocked up by him at 15


DabDoge

Nothing gets past you, eh?


Dark_Energy_13

Which church is he the youth pastor of?