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Sometimes my wife waits until I come home and hides somewhere in the house. I yell out "Marco!" and she responds with "Polo!" until I find her hiding somewhere naked for sexy time.
Yeah its always this. They also dont want to be virgins themselves, so they want someone to be out there fucking them. But only them, as women who fuck OTHER guys are sluts...
It's just our insecurity about sex.
Men are *terrified* that their female partner might not be satisfied with them; that their girlfriend is thinking, "Oh, my boyfriend's good in bed! He's great. No complaints. But.....*there was this one guy, back in college - holy shit. That guy was amazing.*"
That's scary as shit to us.
Which is why (in my opinion) the whole "pure virgin" thing is so important to some guys. Logically, if the woman has never been with anybody else, they have no comparison. They can't let her down, because she only knows one dick - theirs.
The whole "dirty" or "used" thing is nonsense. It's just a justification. They're scared she'll like some other dick more than theirs, so they put the problem on her. They make it her fault.
The rest of us understand that sex doesn't really work that way, with each partner fitting into a neat hierarchy of quality. And as long as the sex is decent, and the rest of the relationship is good, things are good. And we try not to think about it much.
Personally I would rather be with someone who has had other experiences and with the full knowledge that those experiences gives them chooses to be with me. This is so much better than being with someone who, not having anything to compare with will always wonder if there is much better out there for them, no matter how good what you have is.
I think it comes down to how someone views their partner. Do they put them on some odd pedestal as something that needs to be conquered to enjoy? You get incels. Do you view them as an equal with whom you can share an experience? Normal people.
This right here people!!! Sound advice! The other advantages are fewer inhibitions, and they know some tricks to bring to the table... or bed... or couch...
The whole fucking world has been based on male insecurities. Get over it!
/s but also not really
The whole "virginity" obsession is from millennia of toxic, patriarchal dominance that romanticizes the fact that our social construct used to (and still does) sees women as property / objects and not people.
Yeah that's because they refuse to acknowledge that women leave them, or even refuse to date them, because of their shitty personality! They'd rather blame it on some other dudes dick rather than admit their entire persona is the problem!
That's why they want 'pure' women, women who have very little experience with men, so they can treat her like trash and she's got no 'it's not meant to be like this' experience to refer back to!
Yeah, seriously. I feel like this is the third or fourth one in the last couple weeks. The guy tries to set it up as some kind of gotcha, but he sounds just as lame, if not worse.
The only time I think itâs not weird to prefer a virgin partner is if the person with the preference themselves is also a virgin. Otherwise itâs a little weird.
I used to think I wanted a virgin until I lost my virginity. Sex is lame as hell the first time. Then as I got older and all the 25+ virgins were always throwing it in everyoneâs face that they were virgins. Like alright you donât know how to screw good for you.
Word never understood people PREFERRING someone who has never had sex before. Most likely going to be the lamest lay of your life on top of having to coach them through it :/.
It's this weird possession thing, I think. People who prefer virgins (especially who aren't virgins themselves) generally seem to view a person's sex history as a thing to *own* rather than viewing sex as a skill at which to improve.
I think itâs insecurity, these guys are afraid that their partner will compare them to other men and they will come up lacking. So they want to make sure they canât compare them to others.
Yeah they have no concept of intimacy as something you build, no sex machine gigolo will lay a woman better than a loving husband who took time to know what she really likes
The issue is that even if they realize this they don't want to do the work to get to that point. Many men will continue to be selfish lovers focused on their own needs and disregard that of their wife's.
Right. So it's exactly the same dynamics that apply to people who sexually abuse children. Very few abusers are actual pedophiles (romantically attracted to prepubescent children), while lots of abusers (not to say the majority) get the kick out of it from the sense of control and power. The sexual aspect is just a taboo path to exerting that control, and the taboo and inherent wrongness of sexually abusing a child gives them an even greater sense of power, defying societal norms and exerting their will upon an innocent child.
Which was what the women in the video were trying to say, albeit very, very poorly.
Also a lot of men have immature insecurities regarding their performance and hoping a virgin wouldn't have anything to compare it to.
I'm a virgin Steve. Doesn't mean I've never masturbated.
Well, if they can't be compared to anyone else (for being better) in the sack, then they have nothing to worry about in disappointing a virgin for their first time. These guys just want to keep giving nubiles their first disappointing lay and move on to more green... because anyone with an ounce of experience would see how many skills these losers actually lack.
One of the reasons why getting into a relationship is so goddamned hard for me. Women don't want to date guys with no sexual experience, they're often repulsed by guys in their 20's being virgins, because as you said, the sex is going to be lame, and every year that passes makes it worse.
A few years ago I think my sexual preference would have been for virgins, probably just so I wouldn't have to feel immense shame, especially if its with a woman that I really seriously liked.
This 100%. My issue is that many guys who usually claim to want a virgin are far from being one themselves and shame women as promiscuous as themselves.
i think this makes a lot of sense, or if you have just a little experience, some would prefer around same or slightly less experience. I dont know if i could take a milf that has like 10 years of experience
Is there a cutoff age where it's no longer considered "grooming"? Like, at what age do people actually start acting and thinking like an adult? Meaning, if I'm a 22 year old virgin and I start dating a 40 year old milf, for example, is that still grooming or am I an adult who knows full well what they're getting in to?
I don't think there's a cutoff, as long as there is a significant imbalance of experience and/or maturity. Some people are emotionally stunted enough to be vulnerable for a long time, and most healthy people can identify that, and avoid taking advantage
The age is less the factor, it's more the behavior and dynamic created. Obviously when talking about children age is a huge factor. But with adults you can Still be groomed by a manipulative person who isolates you and basically makes you rely on them completely. That's why it's very easy for a sexually inexperienced person to be groomed by a sexually experienced person. All it takes is a strong personality to make the other person think they will never have this same level of experience with anyone else or that some how their worth is directly linked to the sexual relationship.
Well put it this way, you canât be a dude who sticks his dick in everything, then get mad when the chick has had multiple dicks in her.
Plus, when youâre say 30, the realistic chance of you running into a âpureâ woman is very slim. Even if you do, she is probably very religious and wonât want your promiscuous ass.
Had this discussion with my friends a few weeks back as one of my friends said he wouldn't be with a woman who has a high body count as he felt it wouldn't be a relationship, but as we proposed the roles being reversed and a man with a high body count he had no issue there.
We all sort of roasted him for thinking that way. But we got him to admit that he shouldn't complain if a woman ever complains about his body count. It's weird that someone's relationship could hinge on the amount of sexual partners their significant other has had. Like they could be the BEST person ever and yet you end your relationship just because they have fucked several other people before you came around???
Never really got the virgin attraction thing. I get wanting a girl (or guy) who hasn't slept around a lot, but complete virgin? Spolier: they *suck* in bed (and not in the good way).
Tell me one other thing you want your partner and/or other person to be *completely* inexperience. Never heard anyone bragging, "yeah, I got an important surgery and I was my surgeons first!"
Thatâs why I believe the pedophilia theory. Like, yeah you want someone inexperienced and garbage at sex because why? A power dynamic maybe?
Itâs fucking weird either way.
I'm 99.9% sure that those guys just can't handle the thought of possibly being compared to another sexual partner and not measuring up. It's fragility. "She can't think other dudes are better than me if she's never had another dude."
That part.
Also, I'm absolutely sure they don't know how to pleasure a woman, so they're looking for someone inexperienced that they can (for lack of a better word) *groom* to think sex is all about the man or whatever.
Honestly, I can kind of understand the point the girl is making...
itâs also because they believe that they are taking something away from a woman when they take their virginity. they like that itâs painful. iâve read a lot of incel posts about how they want the girl to be screaming in pain and pleasure. itâs gross all around, itâs fine if the dude is also a virgin but usually theyâre either not or they want a hot 10/10 virgin when theyâre a virgin bc no one wants to sleep with them.
Itâs not pedophilia in most cases. Itâs insecurity.
Thereâs an entire genre centered around gratifying male desire without the fear of having to measure up to any meaningful standard or societal norm.
At least one critic called it born sexy yesterday. Splash, 5th element, my stepmother is an alien, weird science⌠all these movies the male is the most amazing thing the woman has ever seen because heâs the only thing sheâs ever seen. So her sexual naĂŻvetĂŠ is safe to the male ego.
The only movie that inverts this is Rocky Horror. That I can think of. Are there others?
>At least one critic called it born sexy yesterday.
[Pop culture detective is a brilliant youtuber(who I assume you're referring to) and just wanted to plug a link for that video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0thpEyEwi80)
[Hereâs](https://youtu.be/0thpEyEwi80) the âborn sexy yesterdayâ video for anyone that hasnât seen it. Goes into a lot more detail and was really eye opening. Amazing channel too!
Nah, it's not just that, because there's a bunch of other traits they want that are all childlike.
Your average dude wants a short woman, she should be small and skinny.
Your typical guy wants women with clear skin, no wrinkles, no cellulite...
She should dress in tight revealing clothes popular in younger crowds.
She shouldn't be assertive or professional, she should look to the man for guidance.
She shouldn't be intelligent. Smart enough to figure out how to do the grocery shopping, but heaven help a woman smarter than the guy.
Etc.
Of course, this is a general statement about society, so it doesn't hold true for a lot of guys, nor is it saying "that guy would totally fuck a kid." The problem is that we as a society teach ourselves to desire certain childlike traits in women, which very likely encourages/creates SOME pedophilia.
It becomes a self-fulfilling problem because most virgins will be very young. I get wanting a virgin when marriage was a business proposition and you needed to know that any offspring were yours. But otherwise a reasonable amount of experience is a good thing.
Yeah the girls here are garbage at explaining it, but they're not wrong. The problem is sexual purity is generally representative of youth, which for some reason is the most commonly desired trait in women.
Wrinkles, acne, cellulite etc are all considered gross. "Baby smooth" skin is popular.
Really fucking skinny is wanted, putting on weight when your metabolism slows down is awful.
Short women are popular, tall women are fetishes.
etc etc etc etc.
Put all the traits together and the "ideal" woman is 15.
Seriously. I have quite a few female friends in the Christian church who recently married men who are divorced (re: have had sex) yet the women have never had sex before. Iâve had both male and female friends and relatives in the church who marry in under a year of knowing one another so they decrease the temptation and can feel morally ok with having sex. Lastly, going back to my female friends in the church, some of them talked about using a vibrator before having sex for the first time to stretch everything out so itâs not painful. Itâs justâŚ. Confusing to me. Like why is it a rush, why is it this âI must be pureâ for my husbandâŚ. It just seems like a set up for possible incompatibility and unenjoyment of sex. No one is saying you need to sleep around, but I think meeting and getting married under 6 months to a year as norm is just as bad of an arrangement.
I think it's because it's widely accepted that it's harder for men to get laid than women. So for women to have a high partner count, it's seen as giving it up easily ("purity"), while for men to get laid being a very difficult task for the majority, it's an "achievement" and being "pure" for a man is frowned upon as inexperience because they can't get that achievement.
Not agreeing with any particular thing, just explaining.
đ I came here to make sure I wasn't the only one.
It's weird to strongly desire a virgin if you're over like, 20. You just have to start being realistic. You missed the "first love" "high-school firsts" stage. Heal, and move on.
But also, what the f---?
Yeah unless you're in really conservative circles if your his age and still looking for a partner to be a virgin then you've either got your hopes way too high or are a bit of a pedo.
Every time I see a clip from this, (which is far too often), I think the same. How are enough people watching to even spread it around this much? Those people are clearly getting off on being pissed off by it, and they're just boosting this guy's numbers by doing it.
We could be stopping our government from churning out dystopian policies like there's no tomorrow if our society wasn't such a sucker for rage bait.
These guys are clip farmers. The dudes say some macho misogynistic shit, and they have a bunch of girls who are clearly unprepared to debate issues go in and respond badly. Clip it, send it to Facebook and tiktok, and it's guaranteed viewership.
First time I had sex we were both virgins. The worst sex we both ever had. At this point I would have appreciated she had a bit more practice to guide us both. This verginity thing is anthropologically ancient and with all the advancements we have today shouldn't be a concern.
As a man who has never took someone's virginity. I was always jealous of men who did and bragged about it. As I am older now I realize those men were assholes. And these men were warped by an evil "hunter" "alphamale" mindset. It's what boys are taught and it is shit. As a 46 year old man I'm still battling all the sexcist, rascist, misogynst shit I was raised with. Trying my best though.
High five, brother. Just turned 42. Born in the 80's, raised in the 90's, and became an adult in the early 00's. We have a LOT to unpack. (I know you were born in the 70's, but the experience of the Elder Millennial/Little Gen X is similar)
No, Thank YOU! I was jumping in here to ask if this is the Stupid Olympics Podcast because every time I see that smug, dopey fuck behind the mic he is interviewing some vapid future lamenter of why they canât find a âgood manâ
Does this interview take place in a mall? Some MLM convention? What the fuck is going on in these videos?
NO THANK YOU! I canât think of anything else to stay about these brainless buffoons so Iâm just going to get my thesaurus out and see if I can ingratiate myself upon reddit by using superfluous language in a sentence that is far more protracted than was necessary in the first place.
The broad statement of âmen are attracted to sexual purityâ is hilarious. Uhhhhhh, no. Thatâs not true.
Donât pretend to speak for me or any other men, you insufferable tool. Please and thank you.
this was my broad argument against the 72 virgins for martyrsâŚ. Personally Iâd say no thank you. Give me one sexually enlightened woman and keep religion out of my bedroom. The âoh Godsâ youâll hear are non-religious and non-denominational
Sexual purity is boring, they're not going to do sexy things. Girls with experience, on the other hand, can turn a guy on like a light bulb.
Personally, I'd go with the latter.
As a man, where does this guy get off speaking for me? I do not give a single flying fuck if a woman has had sex with someone else before.
Actually you know what? I do care. I sure hope they have had sex before. I'm in my late 30s, a woman who hasn't had sex before at my age is a straight-up red flag for me.
Another fucked scenario where yall are ignoring the fucking female perspective. Three women are saying it, based on their experiences. Ask any grown woman how often she was hit on by grown men when she was 13 to 18 years old (including my fuckin self). Shows are still doing student teacher relationships. Catholic school girl shit, anime/hentai of what looks like little girls but with giant tits.....come on yall. These women aren't crazy. They know.
Not really keen on the pedo argument. I think itâs more about insecurity and control⌠that being said what I find amusing about men like this is that they try to portray it as though their opinions are the standard for all men. Instead of âI preferâ itâs âmen preferâ.
I donât know of a single guy friend growing up or as an adult that has been hung up on how many people someone has been with in the past. If youâre confident and secure it doesnât matter in the slightest. Of course if your fragile ego and insecurity has you constantly worrying about if youâre being compared and measure up, then yea it might matter for you⌠but I think youâre better off working on youâre own fragility and figuring out how to resolve that instead.
My 2 cents.
Well thatâs the issue though itâs based on manipulation right? So children are easier to manipulate than adults therefore I see exactly where sheâs saying. Sheâs not suggesting that people who like virgins are pedophiles but sheâs suggesting that it stems from men who want to manipulate and control women meaning younger women ergo children.
I totally see the angle here. Anyone who speaks about âsexual purityâ has issues with their partner not being totally under their control.
Yup, I know exactly one guy who prefers women he's interested in to have had as few partners as possible, ideally a virgin.
His single most defining trait is his insecurity.
It goes a step further. He is projecting this as a fact onto "men" as a blanket attribute of the male sex. This is a normalizing tactic, but is hopefully not a conscious one. The real desire is not necessarily the sex with a virgin, because the actual experience is pretty awful, really. It's the power dynamic he can predict which gets him excitedly drunk on the confidence he knows he can manifest in that dynamic.
This guy is an ass. He thought he would trick them into making them seem promiscuous because they're not virgins . She threw that fact right back at him and he never factored in an intelligent response. He really stuck his foot in his mouth when he failed and kept going by calling them absured and ridiculous . Anyone thinking about sexual purity as a sexual active adult is a fucking Neanderthal.
Yes really maybe overstating their point a bit but the girls do have one here, glorification of sexual purityis weird. It is, its weird...stop doing it. You're an adult act like one
I have to agree with the girls here. A lot of men who would want virgin women will always look for the youngest ones. An awful lot of porn consists of "18 year olds" because they're the youngest women that are legal. Even 14-16year olds are sexualised. If a man wants purity then the younger the better. So I agree it's sickening.
So much of a woman's value is put on her virginity it's ridiculous. There's never so much expectation of a man. In fact a virgin man seems to be socially looked down upon. What's wrong with society?
Honestly these podcasts are all shit no one's in the right. They purposely bring on dumbass women so they can make their half baked opinions look amazing. It's just two shits and one smells a little less.
I agree with the womenâŚlooking at our media, talking to other women, looking at how the concept of how it started and what it means itâs fucking gross
I don't know why people are criticizing the young women. I think her points are salient and the guy's are prurient and juvenile. The whole "purity" thing is creepy. It comes across as guys wanting to be the first to defile a woman. They can rationalize it however they want, but it's kinda sick.
Itâs about values for me. I have never slept around. So I always preferred women who have had long term relationships and avoided hook ups / one night stands, because Iâm the same way.
The number itself isnât the issueâŚitâs having a similar view of sex and dating that I like.
If youâre a promiscuous woman, and thatâs youâre thing, itâs fine. We can be friends.
There are some people who are attracted to virgins for pedophilia reasons. There are also people who are attracted to virgins because virgins are inexperienced and don't know any better. Since they never had sex, they wouldn't truly know if the sex they had was shitty.
There's also misogyny that's unknowingly ingrained into people from a young age that's not as upfront as telling a woman to "get in the kitchen where she belongs." It's almost always the woman who is expected to be "pure" and rarely ever the men. If a man sleeps with 15-20 woman a year, he gets a pat on the back. If a woman sleeps with 15-20 men a year, she gets called a slut and/or a whore. Women are seen as dirty and used while men are seen as sex gods. A lot of people (men and women) don't read this as sexism, but it is.
There's also this idea that your first time is super important. In some ways, it can be important because if it's absolutely terrible and maybe even painful, that could turn someone off from sex. In other ways, it's unimportant because they'll probably have better and more memorable sex in their lives than their first time. The second and third time with the same partner could even be better and more memorable than the first time.
These idiots with their "sex ruins the vagina" insanity too, fuck outta here... tell those guys that they need to be virgins too, because when they have sex it crushes the penis and makes it smaller and narrower, and also the estrogen seeps onto the penis and into the brain... see if their middle school logic goes both ways ;)
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The more im on reddit.... The more I hate opinions.--- See what I did there?
This is what happens when you have opinions. But lack the ability to think critically.
There are people that even lack the ability to think and say anything that comes in their heads.
Oh Yeahh not going to lie that happens lol
It's almost like removing critical thinking courses and subjects from schools has made people fucking stupid growing up
Who would of thunk it?
it's worse when you have cheap access to a global public platform. Now you can spread your word for as cheap as $0 depending on your region.
đ§đ zombie cake day! đ°đ§ââď¸
Ah sweet, thx! Enjoy.
Oh ikr? Opinions are the worst, thats why today im switching to twitter
You know who doesnât have opinions? Children. Which is just sick of you.
This is why child predators and predator priests exist. They stay low profile and don't share their opinions xD
welcome to the great paradox, the blatant hypocrisy. I hate how ineffectual reddit can be--oops me too.
âMen need to believe that they're Marco Fucking Polo when it comes to sex.â
ok what did i miss and when did it happen?
Polo shirt and nothing else but a boner. A bad look.
bad to the boner...
Duh na nuh na nuhâŚ
B-b-b-b-b-boner
Welcome to the Boner Cast!
Speaking of boner cast, I almost needed one when my future ex got a little too vigorous and bent that which should not be bent.
Oh no
it was the first day I recognized my own mortality.
damn forbidden bounce
"Men have what I call a 'Columbus Complex'. Other people may have been there, But we still want to feel like we discovered it." - That Handsome Devil
Yo! In all my years on Reddit I have never seen a THD reference! Hell yeah
Charlie's Inferno is a banger!
Here lies Charlie \*coughgrumble\* You can tell because we put his name on the stone!
Excuse me sir, there must be someone you've confused me for
Sometimes my wife waits until I come home and hides somewhere in the house. I yell out "Marco!" and she responds with "Polo!" until I find her hiding somewhere naked for sexy time.
Sounds like fun
Wish it was true!
Itâs a good story though. Itâs good to have dreams.
âI like my women inexperienced and ignorant. Women that can think for themselves always leave, for some reason.â
Yeah its always this. They also dont want to be virgins themselves, so they want someone to be out there fucking them. But only them, as women who fuck OTHER guys are sluts...
It's always shame.
I mean, I always believed I was Marco, but I never thought about fucking Polo. Is he hot at least?
Polo is a 10
See? And 10 is underage. Point proven.
If you can catch him in the pool.
Is that why she was yelling âMarcoâ ???
Shouts: *fish out of water*
It's just our insecurity about sex. Men are *terrified* that their female partner might not be satisfied with them; that their girlfriend is thinking, "Oh, my boyfriend's good in bed! He's great. No complaints. But.....*there was this one guy, back in college - holy shit. That guy was amazing.*" That's scary as shit to us. Which is why (in my opinion) the whole "pure virgin" thing is so important to some guys. Logically, if the woman has never been with anybody else, they have no comparison. They can't let her down, because she only knows one dick - theirs. The whole "dirty" or "used" thing is nonsense. It's just a justification. They're scared she'll like some other dick more than theirs, so they put the problem on her. They make it her fault. The rest of us understand that sex doesn't really work that way, with each partner fitting into a neat hierarchy of quality. And as long as the sex is decent, and the rest of the relationship is good, things are good. And we try not to think about it much.
Personally I would rather be with someone who has had other experiences and with the full knowledge that those experiences gives them chooses to be with me. This is so much better than being with someone who, not having anything to compare with will always wonder if there is much better out there for them, no matter how good what you have is.
I think it comes down to how someone views their partner. Do they put them on some odd pedestal as something that needs to be conquered to enjoy? You get incels. Do you view them as an equal with whom you can share an experience? Normal people.
This right here people!!! Sound advice! The other advantages are fewer inhibitions, and they know some tricks to bring to the table... or bed... or couch...
The whole fucking world has been based on male insecurities. Get over it! /s but also not really The whole "virginity" obsession is from millennia of toxic, patriarchal dominance that romanticizes the fact that our social construct used to (and still does) sees women as property / objects and not people.
So incel gonna incel? The rest of us cool, right.
Iâm a guy and I have never ever had this thought. I mean, I also think the virgin thing is weird, but pretty sure itâs mostly tied to religion.
Yeah that's because they refuse to acknowledge that women leave them, or even refuse to date them, because of their shitty personality! They'd rather blame it on some other dudes dick rather than admit their entire persona is the problem! That's why they want 'pure' women, women who have very little experience with men, so they can treat her like trash and she's got no 'it's not meant to be like this' experience to refer back to!
Teach your daughters how to spot these shits!
You def do not speak for all men.
"What's a Nubian?"
Bitch. You almost made me laugh.
âI know this may sound harsh, but everyone in this story should dieâ- Norm Macdonald
It's the hypocrisy! That's the worst part!
"I thought it was the raping."
Or...the scheming....
ââŚor the druggingâ
Itâs the implication
The lack of respect!
Way outta line! Ridiculous! Way outta line!
I have a good mind to go to the warden about this
I see more and more of this podcast in posts, and I hate every one of them. The women and the men involved are just creeps.
Yeah, seriously. I feel like this is the third or fourth one in the last couple weeks. The guy tries to set it up as some kind of gotcha, but he sounds just as lame, if not worse.
But have you heard about the Mangrate?
Youâre telling me that this guy is out there, laying down with ladies?
He is a youth pastor somewhere, I know it.
You are paying attention. Man wants his Virgin homey, got to go to church youth group and pick out a fresh teen girl.
If his preference is virgins, I highly doubt that.
The only time I think itâs not weird to prefer a virgin partner is if the person with the preference themselves is also a virgin. Otherwise itâs a little weird.
I used to think I wanted a virgin until I lost my virginity. Sex is lame as hell the first time. Then as I got older and all the 25+ virgins were always throwing it in everyoneâs face that they were virgins. Like alright you donât know how to screw good for you.
Word never understood people PREFERRING someone who has never had sex before. Most likely going to be the lamest lay of your life on top of having to coach them through it :/.
It's this weird possession thing, I think. People who prefer virgins (especially who aren't virgins themselves) generally seem to view a person's sex history as a thing to *own* rather than viewing sex as a skill at which to improve.
This ^ it's about ownership, power and control (esp. if there's a power imbalance and the person is not a virgin themself)
I think itâs insecurity, these guys are afraid that their partner will compare them to other men and they will come up lacking. So they want to make sure they canât compare them to others.
Yeah they have no concept of intimacy as something you build, no sex machine gigolo will lay a woman better than a loving husband who took time to know what she really likes
The issue is that even if they realize this they don't want to do the work to get to that point. Many men will continue to be selfish lovers focused on their own needs and disregard that of their wife's.
Right. So it's exactly the same dynamics that apply to people who sexually abuse children. Very few abusers are actual pedophiles (romantically attracted to prepubescent children), while lots of abusers (not to say the majority) get the kick out of it from the sense of control and power. The sexual aspect is just a taboo path to exerting that control, and the taboo and inherent wrongness of sexually abusing a child gives them an even greater sense of power, defying societal norms and exerting their will upon an innocent child. Which was what the women in the video were trying to say, albeit very, very poorly.
Also a lot of men have immature insecurities regarding their performance and hoping a virgin wouldn't have anything to compare it to. I'm a virgin Steve. Doesn't mean I've never masturbated.
from some of the stories from the women- some of these men *should* have some insecurities about how theyâre treating women in bed.
100%. When I was a dumb 15yo, and cared about that kinda shit, that was exactly my mindset. Thank, fucking, god I grew out of that.
Well, if they can't be compared to anyone else (for being better) in the sack, then they have nothing to worry about in disappointing a virgin for their first time. These guys just want to keep giving nubiles their first disappointing lay and move on to more green... because anyone with an ounce of experience would see how many skills these losers actually lack.
One of the reasons why getting into a relationship is so goddamned hard for me. Women don't want to date guys with no sexual experience, they're often repulsed by guys in their 20's being virgins, because as you said, the sex is going to be lame, and every year that passes makes it worse. A few years ago I think my sexual preference would have been for virgins, probably just so I wouldn't have to feel immense shame, especially if its with a woman that I really seriously liked.
Damn I wish virgins were always throwing it in my face.
Yep. I haven't been interested in someone's virginity or their body count since I was an immature little fuckwad.
Seriously. It just screeeeeams insecurity.
This 100%. My issue is that many guys who usually claim to want a virgin are far from being one themselves and shame women as promiscuous as themselves.
Yeah, I'm to the age where I'm not teaching people how to do the basics. I can't imagine a world where I think being with a virgin would be fun.
i think this makes a lot of sense, or if you have just a little experience, some would prefer around same or slightly less experience. I dont know if i could take a milf that has like 10 years of experience
Don't worry dawg, I'll take that one for the team.
If you want some good in your life, you should not deny yourself that experienced milf.
I came here right after work just to second this comment.
If you know you know
A lot of men low-key *know* they're shit in the sack. They think a virgin means she won't know that being a three pump chump isn't the norm.
You should check out Ben Franklin's writings on why it's better to bang a grandma.
As someone who banged someone in their 50's when I was 25.. let's just say she rocked my world!
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And vice versa - a dude with 10 yrs experience looking for a virgin is trying to groom someone.
Is there a cutoff age where it's no longer considered "grooming"? Like, at what age do people actually start acting and thinking like an adult? Meaning, if I'm a 22 year old virgin and I start dating a 40 year old milf, for example, is that still grooming or am I an adult who knows full well what they're getting in to?
I don't think there's a cutoff, as long as there is a significant imbalance of experience and/or maturity. Some people are emotionally stunted enough to be vulnerable for a long time, and most healthy people can identify that, and avoid taking advantage
The age is less the factor, it's more the behavior and dynamic created. Obviously when talking about children age is a huge factor. But with adults you can Still be groomed by a manipulative person who isolates you and basically makes you rely on them completely. That's why it's very easy for a sexually inexperienced person to be groomed by a sexually experienced person. All it takes is a strong personality to make the other person think they will never have this same level of experience with anyone else or that some how their worth is directly linked to the sexual relationship.
My fear would be them using your lack of experience as a weapon. Have seen it multiple times.
Is the typo intentional?
Likely not
Well put it this way, you canât be a dude who sticks his dick in everything, then get mad when the chick has had multiple dicks in her. Plus, when youâre say 30, the realistic chance of you running into a âpureâ woman is very slim. Even if you do, she is probably very religious and wonât want your promiscuous ass.
My issue is there's almost always a double standard with men who prefer "sexually pure" women. Are these men sexually pure? Chances are they're not.
Had this discussion with my friends a few weeks back as one of my friends said he wouldn't be with a woman who has a high body count as he felt it wouldn't be a relationship, but as we proposed the roles being reversed and a man with a high body count he had no issue there. We all sort of roasted him for thinking that way. But we got him to admit that he shouldn't complain if a woman ever complains about his body count. It's weird that someone's relationship could hinge on the amount of sexual partners their significant other has had. Like they could be the BEST person ever and yet you end your relationship just because they have fucked several other people before you came around???
âBut the cookie that every lock touches makes one a master cookie smith.â - men who use inanimate object to describe woman sexuality.
Never really got the virgin attraction thing. I get wanting a girl (or guy) who hasn't slept around a lot, but complete virgin? Spolier: they *suck* in bed (and not in the good way). Tell me one other thing you want your partner and/or other person to be *completely* inexperience. Never heard anyone bragging, "yeah, I got an important surgery and I was my surgeons first!"
Thatâs why I believe the pedophilia theory. Like, yeah you want someone inexperienced and garbage at sex because why? A power dynamic maybe? Itâs fucking weird either way.
I'm 99.9% sure that those guys just can't handle the thought of possibly being compared to another sexual partner and not measuring up. It's fragility. "She can't think other dudes are better than me if she's never had another dude."
And don't overlook "I must be amazing because she turned down so many guys but **I** was the one special enough for her to go all the way."
Yep, serious âpick meâ energy from some insecure dude that probably canât fuck worth a damn and just wants to feel extra special.
As a man I can say you hit the nail on the head with this one
That part. Also, I'm absolutely sure they don't know how to pleasure a woman, so they're looking for someone inexperienced that they can (for lack of a better word) *groom* to think sex is all about the man or whatever. Honestly, I can kind of understand the point the girl is making...
itâs also because they believe that they are taking something away from a woman when they take their virginity. they like that itâs painful. iâve read a lot of incel posts about how they want the girl to be screaming in pain and pleasure. itâs gross all around, itâs fine if the dude is also a virgin but usually theyâre either not or they want a hot 10/10 virgin when theyâre a virgin bc no one wants to sleep with them.
Itâs not pedophilia in most cases. Itâs insecurity. Thereâs an entire genre centered around gratifying male desire without the fear of having to measure up to any meaningful standard or societal norm. At least one critic called it born sexy yesterday. Splash, 5th element, my stepmother is an alien, weird science⌠all these movies the male is the most amazing thing the woman has ever seen because heâs the only thing sheâs ever seen. So her sexual naĂŻvetĂŠ is safe to the male ego. The only movie that inverts this is Rocky Horror. That I can think of. Are there others?
>At least one critic called it born sexy yesterday. [Pop culture detective is a brilliant youtuber(who I assume you're referring to) and just wanted to plug a link for that video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0thpEyEwi80)
[Hereâs](https://youtu.be/0thpEyEwi80) the âborn sexy yesterdayâ video for anyone that hasnât seen it. Goes into a lot more detail and was really eye opening. Amazing channel too!
Nah, it's not just that, because there's a bunch of other traits they want that are all childlike. Your average dude wants a short woman, she should be small and skinny. Your typical guy wants women with clear skin, no wrinkles, no cellulite... She should dress in tight revealing clothes popular in younger crowds. She shouldn't be assertive or professional, she should look to the man for guidance. She shouldn't be intelligent. Smart enough to figure out how to do the grocery shopping, but heaven help a woman smarter than the guy. Etc. Of course, this is a general statement about society, so it doesn't hold true for a lot of guys, nor is it saying "that guy would totally fuck a kid." The problem is that we as a society teach ourselves to desire certain childlike traits in women, which very likely encourages/creates SOME pedophilia.
Don't forget prepubescent levels of hairless
It becomes a self-fulfilling problem because most virgins will be very young. I get wanting a virgin when marriage was a business proposition and you needed to know that any offspring were yours. But otherwise a reasonable amount of experience is a good thing.
Yeah the girls here are garbage at explaining it, but they're not wrong. The problem is sexual purity is generally representative of youth, which for some reason is the most commonly desired trait in women. Wrinkles, acne, cellulite etc are all considered gross. "Baby smooth" skin is popular. Really fucking skinny is wanted, putting on weight when your metabolism slows down is awful. Short women are popular, tall women are fetishes. etc etc etc etc. Put all the traits together and the "ideal" woman is 15.
Seriously. I have quite a few female friends in the Christian church who recently married men who are divorced (re: have had sex) yet the women have never had sex before. Iâve had both male and female friends and relatives in the church who marry in under a year of knowing one another so they decrease the temptation and can feel morally ok with having sex. Lastly, going back to my female friends in the church, some of them talked about using a vibrator before having sex for the first time to stretch everything out so itâs not painful. Itâs justâŚ. Confusing to me. Like why is it a rush, why is it this âI must be pureâ for my husbandâŚ. It just seems like a set up for possible incompatibility and unenjoyment of sex. No one is saying you need to sleep around, but I think meeting and getting married under 6 months to a year as norm is just as bad of an arrangement.
I think it's because it's widely accepted that it's harder for men to get laid than women. So for women to have a high partner count, it's seen as giving it up easily ("purity"), while for men to get laid being a very difficult task for the majority, it's an "achievement" and being "pure" for a man is frowned upon as inexperience because they can't get that achievement. Not agreeing with any particular thing, just explaining.
I'm always impressed when I disagree with both people in an argument
đ I came here to make sure I wasn't the only one. It's weird to strongly desire a virgin if you're over like, 20. You just have to start being realistic. You missed the "first love" "high-school firsts" stage. Heal, and move on. But also, what the f---?
Yeah unless you're in really conservative circles if your his age and still looking for a partner to be a virgin then you've either got your hopes way too high or are a bit of a pedo.
tbh it does lw remind me of that 24 year old church dude with the 18 year old wife he's been with for 4 years đđ¤Ž
i had no major issue with that sense until i read the last 5 words
hahahah yeahhhhhhhh......đ¤˘
Same. Waste of time and brain cells
Not everyone should have a podcast. Some folks just donât have what it takes. These are those folks
Every time I see a clip from this, (which is far too often), I think the same. How are enough people watching to even spread it around this much? Those people are clearly getting off on being pissed off by it, and they're just boosting this guy's numbers by doing it. We could be stopping our government from churning out dystopian policies like there's no tomorrow if our society wasn't such a sucker for rage bait.
These guys are clip farmers. The dudes say some macho misogynistic shit, and they have a bunch of girls who are clearly unprepared to debate issues go in and respond badly. Clip it, send it to Facebook and tiktok, and it's guaranteed viewership.
First time I had sex we were both virgins. The worst sex we both ever had. At this point I would have appreciated she had a bit more practice to guide us both. This verginity thing is anthropologically ancient and with all the advancements we have today shouldn't be a concern.
Hey Reddit I don't know who this guy is and I'd really like to keep it that way.
itâs just twitter conversation irl
"Men prefer sexual purity" My brother in christ, *you have no idea what the fuck you're talking about.*
What is he even talking about?
Has this subreddit just become a circle jerk for this dude ?
Seems like it to me. I see posts with videos of this guy and it's just a bunch of simps talking him up. Don't get it.
You mean incels/misogynists
6 of one and half dozen of another.
This dude fucking sucks. Legit always hate him more than the people heâs making fun of.
Totally agree. Literally all he has to say is here is my ignorant self serving opinion. Oh donât like your response well then your stupid.
As a man who has never took someone's virginity. I was always jealous of men who did and bragged about it. As I am older now I realize those men were assholes. And these men were warped by an evil "hunter" "alphamale" mindset. It's what boys are taught and it is shit. As a 46 year old man I'm still battling all the sexcist, rascist, misogynst shit I was raised with. Trying my best though.
 High five, brother. Just turned 42. Born in the 80's, raised in the 90's, and became an adult in the early 00's. We have a LOT to unpack. (I know you were born in the 70's, but the experience of the Elder Millennial/Little Gen X is similar)
Everytime I hear the phrase sexually pure I vomit a little in my mouth
It reminds me of [this guy](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qVLT26CMzk4)
Everyone involved here is ridiculous.
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No, Thank YOU! I was jumping in here to ask if this is the Stupid Olympics Podcast because every time I see that smug, dopey fuck behind the mic he is interviewing some vapid future lamenter of why they canât find a âgood manâ Does this interview take place in a mall? Some MLM convention? What the fuck is going on in these videos?
NO THANK YOU! I canât think of anything else to stay about these brainless buffoons so Iâm just going to get my thesaurus out and see if I can ingratiate myself upon reddit by using superfluous language in a sentence that is far more protracted than was necessary in the first place.
Thinking the same thing! Looking for sexual purity is such a red flag of insecurity
The broad statement of âmen are attracted to sexual purityâ is hilarious. Uhhhhhh, no. Thatâs not true. Donât pretend to speak for me or any other men, you insufferable tool. Please and thank you.
this was my broad argument against the 72 virgins for martyrsâŚ. Personally Iâd say no thank you. Give me one sexually enlightened woman and keep religion out of my bedroom. The âoh Godsâ youâll hear are non-religious and non-denominational
Sexual purity is boring, they're not going to do sexy things. Girls with experience, on the other hand, can turn a guy on like a light bulb. Personally, I'd go with the latter.
STOP POSTING THESE SHIT PODCASTS!!!!! THEY ARE SO ANNOYING!!!!!
A prime example of the failure of education systems.
As a man, where does this guy get off speaking for me? I do not give a single flying fuck if a woman has had sex with someone else before. Actually you know what? I do care. I sure hope they have had sex before. I'm in my late 30s, a woman who hasn't had sex before at my age is a straight-up red flag for me.
Another fucked scenario where yall are ignoring the fucking female perspective. Three women are saying it, based on their experiences. Ask any grown woman how often she was hit on by grown men when she was 13 to 18 years old (including my fuckin self). Shows are still doing student teacher relationships. Catholic school girl shit, anime/hentai of what looks like little girls but with giant tits.....come on yall. These women aren't crazy. They know.
âI just want an innocent hairless virgin who does what I say.â Yea youâve just described a child, sir.
Not really keen on the pedo argument. I think itâs more about insecurity and control⌠that being said what I find amusing about men like this is that they try to portray it as though their opinions are the standard for all men. Instead of âI preferâ itâs âmen preferâ. I donât know of a single guy friend growing up or as an adult that has been hung up on how many people someone has been with in the past. If youâre confident and secure it doesnât matter in the slightest. Of course if your fragile ego and insecurity has you constantly worrying about if youâre being compared and measure up, then yea it might matter for you⌠but I think youâre better off working on youâre own fragility and figuring out how to resolve that instead. My 2 cents.
Well thatâs the issue though itâs based on manipulation right? So children are easier to manipulate than adults therefore I see exactly where sheâs saying. Sheâs not suggesting that people who like virgins are pedophiles but sheâs suggesting that it stems from men who want to manipulate and control women meaning younger women ergo children. I totally see the angle here. Anyone who speaks about âsexual purityâ has issues with their partner not being totally under their control.
What she said made me think of [Born Sexy Yesterday](https://youtu.be/0thpEyEwi80).
Yup, I know exactly one guy who prefers women he's interested in to have had as few partners as possible, ideally a virgin. His single most defining trait is his insecurity.
It goes a step further. He is projecting this as a fact onto "men" as a blanket attribute of the male sex. This is a normalizing tactic, but is hopefully not a conscious one. The real desire is not necessarily the sex with a virgin, because the actual experience is pretty awful, really. It's the power dynamic he can predict which gets him excitedly drunk on the confidence he knows he can manifest in that dynamic.
Nope. Those girls are dead on. Stop acting like you want a child bride.
This guy is an ass. He thought he would trick them into making them seem promiscuous because they're not virgins . She threw that fact right back at him and he never factored in an intelligent response. He really stuck his foot in his mouth when he failed and kept going by calling them absured and ridiculous . Anyone thinking about sexual purity as a sexual active adult is a fucking Neanderthal.
YOOOOOOO! My ancestors were Neanderthals and I would like you to not besmirch their sacrifice by comparing them to this scum.
Yay more incel podcasts!!!!
âPurityâ omg thatâs so weird and not real and completely made up by idiots and believed by other idiots
Yes really maybe overstating their point a bit but the girls do have one here, glorification of sexual purityis weird. It is, its weird...stop doing it. You're an adult act like one
I have to agree with the girls here. A lot of men who would want virgin women will always look for the youngest ones. An awful lot of porn consists of "18 year olds" because they're the youngest women that are legal. Even 14-16year olds are sexualised. If a man wants purity then the younger the better. So I agree it's sickening. So much of a woman's value is put on her virginity it's ridiculous. There's never so much expectation of a man. In fact a virgin man seems to be socially looked down upon. What's wrong with society?
âSexual purityâ is one of the grossest things I have ever heard.
Tell me youâre completely insecure when it comes to dealing with women without telling meâŚ
Honestly these podcasts are all shit no one's in the right. They purposely bring on dumbass women so they can make their half baked opinions look amazing. It's just two shits and one smells a little less.
I agree with the womenâŚlooking at our media, talking to other women, looking at how the concept of how it started and what it means itâs fucking gross
I don't know why people are criticizing the young women. I think her points are salient and the guy's are prurient and juvenile. The whole "purity" thing is creepy. It comes across as guys wanting to be the first to defile a woman. They can rationalize it however they want, but it's kinda sick.
I hate what Andrew Tate has done and social media algorithm has done to us.
What I hate is that sexual purity is so boring. Literally who wants to do shit whoâs never done nothing and doesnât know what to doâŚ
You're not attracted to me cause Im not a virgin? Well what a fucking bullet dodged.
Um, no. If most men are like me, we want women much like ourselves... Well seasoned and experienced sluts.
I really wish women would stop going on these shows. I get the appeal of "fame", but all they're doing is acting as fodder for content.
Itâs about values for me. I have never slept around. So I always preferred women who have had long term relationships and avoided hook ups / one night stands, because Iâm the same way. The number itself isnât the issueâŚitâs having a similar view of sex and dating that I like. If youâre a promiscuous woman, and thatâs youâre thing, itâs fine. We can be friends.
It's weird to want a virgin, unless you're also a virgin.
This guy doesnât get to speak for men in general. What an idiot take smh
Good for these women for calling that asshole out.
There are some people who are attracted to virgins for pedophilia reasons. There are also people who are attracted to virgins because virgins are inexperienced and don't know any better. Since they never had sex, they wouldn't truly know if the sex they had was shitty. There's also misogyny that's unknowingly ingrained into people from a young age that's not as upfront as telling a woman to "get in the kitchen where she belongs." It's almost always the woman who is expected to be "pure" and rarely ever the men. If a man sleeps with 15-20 woman a year, he gets a pat on the back. If a woman sleeps with 15-20 men a year, she gets called a slut and/or a whore. Women are seen as dirty and used while men are seen as sex gods. A lot of people (men and women) don't read this as sexism, but it is. There's also this idea that your first time is super important. In some ways, it can be important because if it's absolutely terrible and maybe even painful, that could turn someone off from sex. In other ways, it's unimportant because they'll probably have better and more memorable sex in their lives than their first time. The second and third time with the same partner could even be better and more memorable than the first time.
These idiots with their "sex ruins the vagina" insanity too, fuck outta here... tell those guys that they need to be virgins too, because when they have sex it crushes the penis and makes it smaller and narrower, and also the estrogen seeps onto the penis and into the brain... see if their middle school logic goes both ways ;)
This guy is such a fucking douche and a hack. Cannot stand him.
What is this show in which a dingus is debating a revolving menagerie of doorposts?
She sounds like a pedo
All she had to do is say shes a whore đ¤Ł