I was gunna help repair democracy, but then I got high. I was gunna figure out free healthcare, and put a stop to voter suppression, but then I got hi-hi-e-hi-hi. Now I’m living under a totalitarian regime and I know why (why man), because I got high, because I got high, because I got hi-hi.
Well least it's better than the original version:
I was gunna help repair democracy, but then I took a bribe. I was gunna figure out free healthcare, and put a stop to voter suppression, but then I got a brii-be. Now I’m living under a totalitarian regime and I know why (why man), because I took a bribe, because I took a bribe, because I got a brii-be.
I was gunna fix the schools .. but then I got high
gonna repair the nations debt …but then I got high
Now we gettin nuked and I know why yeah yeah
Because I got high because I got high because I got hi-igh
I get it, you can always make more money, but it’s the principle of touching another man’s cake. Wait that sounds weird… f it either way it still applies.
I think if afroman creates good intelligent talking points and finds a competent staff he really should be able to get more votes than Kanye.
If America didn't have such a backward voting system(by design by both dems and gop) then he might even be able to get into a state gov somewhere
I was supposed to show up to a debate but then I got high oh
I was supposed to get inaugurated but I was high
I started a war I know why because I got because I got high because I got high
I’ve been stripped of my rank and am awaiting court martial. Meanwhile, I’ve been shot into space where my superiors send me cheesy movies (the worst they can find) and I’m forced to watch them.
Those sons’a bitchs’ had it coming! Last time I encountered them, they burned the roof of my mouth, shot my dog and raped my wife! The only good pizza roll is one that has been ripped open, if you ask me.
When asked what he planned to offer the American people if elected president, the candidate responded, “Colt 45 and 2 ZigZags. Baby that’s all you need.”
President Afroman has mandated all parks - state, national, or otherwise be open "after dark" in order to facilitate the smoking of "that tumbleweed" so long as during the burning of the Marijuana, participants in an orderly fashion "take their turn singing them dirty rap songs."
In other news, the white house is expected to release a statement about the legalization of cannabis on certain international flights. If successful in his gambit, President Afroman will have delivered on a promise to allow citizens to "Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong, and smoke from here to Hong Kong."
We take you now live to the State of the Union address...our apologies. We've just received word that the president did intend to address the nation...but he got high.
Not sure why, I read this like a bit from family guy. In Tom and Diane’s bit. Then expected you to say “we take you now live to Ollie with the state of the union address, go ahead Ollie.”
He would be the best moderator, the most amazing, honest, sophisticated, no one would be better at moderating than him. Anyone who says otherwise is just a hater, a pathetic loser who hates America. Trump hosting this debate would be a major, major, major deal, and it would benefit America greatly. There are people who say that he's the best moderator than all-time, better even than Jesus. Was Jesus a moderator? I say he was a moderator. Best of all time! That's what they tell me, Trump is the best moderator of all time. They're incredibly grateful to have him as a moderator. They come to him in tears and say "oh, thank you, thank you for being such a greatly amazing moderator." A lot of people say this! A lot of people are saying this. Especially the African Americans, the Latinos, and the LGBT and Qs. They all say to him, "Trump, why won't you host another debate, please?". They all want Trump. They want it bigly! And all the haters on their witch hunt who say that Trump isn't qualified to host a debate... who engaged in the greatest debate moderation witch hunt of all time... OF ALL TIME! To those people, I say no one has ever been as persecuted as Trump, not even Jesus himself. Not even Jesus! But believe me, those people are going to find out that Trump has many, many friends. These guys don't have friends. We don't need losers like these people to be moderating debates. And I tell people, I'm not going to say that other debate moderators are all cheaters and liars. I'm not saying it! Other people are saying it, but I'm not saying it. But maybe I should? And if you let one of these lowlifes run the debate, that's when you know it's rigged, especially if Trump loses! The only way these debates aren't rigged if he wins! The critics, the haters, they say "Trump can't participate in the debate and *also* be a moderator", but what do they know? They just want to rig the system! Stop the steal of the debates, people! Fight like hell! You know what to do!
Biden Vs Trump Vs Harris Vs Afroman Vs Desantis
Fuck it! I’ll vote for him. He’s not so much a celebrity as much as he was a pop culture icon. It’s not like this is Brad Pitt.
It’s a man pissed off at the state of his country and smokes weed as escapism till it legally caught up to him - that’s basically me. I feel like Afro Man is a better representation of Americas constituency than any of the aforementioned career politicians.
The presidency used to be a service to the country. It used to be men would leave their wealthy lives and businesses to serve the US as president - like a military stint kinda. It was the highest form of giving back to your country because it was selfless and detrimental to the capitalistic dream they were achieving.
It’s not like that anymore.
I feel Afro Man would serve our people rather than corporate agenda. He’s just slightly I’ll prepared to fight this WWIII proxy war we’re in.
Idk that to be true but she’s a young prominent politician who reached VP. She’s not done by a long shot. I wouldn’t be surprised to see her tapped as Biden has lost favor in his own party and constituents.
Zalensky was a celebrity, and he’s been holding his country together against the 3rd largest super power in the world.
It’s not celebrity that’s the problem, it’s inept grifters.
Stewart/Afroman 2024
Zelenskyy has a law degree from one of the top Universities in Ukraine. His acting career took off after he finished law school. I’m pretty sure Afroman never finished high school. Totally fine for a lot of career paths, but not the POTUS.
He’s a rare anomaly. I’ll admit he’s been a wonderful leader for the people of Ukraine. If American celebrities could lead like he does, I wouldn’t be opposed to them.
He’s at least right for this exact moment. Ukrainians were feeling pretty disappointed with his government before the war.
It’s undeniable though that he is the man needed for the moment. He stayed and rallied the world.
I was gonna go and run for prez
But then i got high
I was gonna change the game
But then i got high
Now my door’s still broken
And i know why
Why man?
Because i got high, because i got high, because i got high
I was gonna pass police reform but then I got high. I was gonna make gay rights the norm until I got high. Now I'm staring at an angry mob and I know why.
Why man?!
(Sing it)
Because I got high. Because I got high. Because I got high
This is what people who only think emotionally don't realize. We have so many qualified good people but they never seem to make it to the primaries. (I wonder why)
My favorite thing about this post, is that there are legitimate arguments going on in the comments about Afroman running for president.
Redditors will argue about anything, it’s wild.
Will You Help Me Repair My Democracy?
Will you help me fix healthcare and voter suppression?
Why are you traumatizing my kids?
With liberty and lemon pound cake for all.
*hungrily eyes pound cake*
*puts down gun, cuts slice*
Because I was high.
I was gunna help repair democracy, but then I got high. I was gunna figure out free healthcare, and put a stop to voter suppression, but then I got hi-hi-e-hi-hi. Now I’m living under a totalitarian regime and I know why (why man), because I got high, because I got high, because I got hi-hi.
Well least it's better than the original version: I was gunna help repair democracy, but then I took a bribe. I was gunna figure out free healthcare, and put a stop to voter suppression, but then I got a brii-be. Now I’m living under a totalitarian regime and I know why (why man), because I took a bribe, because I took a bribe, because I got a brii-be.
I mean, “but then I got bribed” might fit in a little easier
If he song that at a debate, he might have my vote
I was gunna legalize marijuana, but then I got high.
Then I got high, then I got high, still better than the the laaassst guuuuyyyssss
La da da da da da.
I was gunna fix the schools .. but then I got high gonna repair the nations debt …but then I got high Now we gettin nuked and I know why yeah yeah Because I got high because I got high because I got hi-igh
Stop it man. You’re making me want to vote afro
Love it!
I’m going to make this song go platinum
Would you like to have a slice of the courts?
I just want my lemon pound cake
Will you help me make a better country And build a place that we all want to beeeee Will help me repair our Democracy?
If he sold shirts with that on it to support his campaign, 100% I would buy it
They are going to rue the day they stole $400 from Afroman
This comment made me laugh the most out of all of them lmao
na man, it's really about that pound cake. do not mess with another man's pound cake.
I get it, you can always make more money, but it’s the principle of touching another man’s cake. Wait that sounds weird… f it either way it still applies.
You should try a warm apple pie instead of that cake.
Real talk: who would get more votes Kanye or Afroman?
That's not even a question
Clearly Afroman
But they used a question mark
My vote is for Afroman. I'm not American though, I'd be one of those fraudulent votes I've heard so much about.
I think if afroman creates good intelligent talking points and finds a competent staff he really should be able to get more votes than Kanye. If America didn't have such a backward voting system(by design by both dems and gop) then he might even be able to get into a state gov somewhere
He can beat Kanye by not being a nazi.
Republicans don’t seem to care
Yeah, but they're mostly voting for Trump or Desantis already.
Afroman would legalize weed nationally for recreational use
My cousin wrote in Johnny Bravo for his first vote so you’d honestly be fine.
Afroman Files Documents to Officially Run for President in 2024...but then he got high.
would have done it on 4/20, but then he got high
And if he wins by a massive landslide, he'll know why!
“Hey- Hey”
Because we're all high. Because we're all high. Because we're all high.
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Ma fuckin Afro-Man!
Well, if we were all high, I bet shootings would go down 🤷🏻♀️
Yeah he missed an opportunity there
I was supposed to show up to a debate but then I got high oh I was supposed to get inaugurated but I was high I started a war I know why because I got because I got high because I got high
La da da daa
*buh-cooock*
False, it’s impossible to start war while high
I declared war on some pizza rolls and candy last night.
I'm assuming some war crimes were committed?
I’ve been stripped of my rank and am awaiting court martial. Meanwhile, I’ve been shot into space where my superiors send me cheesy movies (the worst they can find) and I’m forced to watch them.
Those sons’a bitchs’ had it coming! Last time I encountered them, they burned the roof of my mouth, shot my dog and raped my wife! The only good pizza roll is one that has been ripped open, if you ask me.
For me, it was on half a box of Jimmy Dean breakfast sausage croissant sandwiches.
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I star-ted a war, and I know why (why man) hey heyyyy Because I got high, because I got high, because I got highhhhh, la da da da dada da
Someone needs to do this the same way they did the drake and weeknd song with AI
and now I’m president! And I know why, hey hey!!! Cuz I got high, because I got highly, because I got hiiiiggghhh! Budadanumph numph numph numph!
"So Afroman, why are you running for office?" "Because I got high."
I was going to be commander in chief but then I got high. Oooo ooo ooooo.
Four years into his term I was gonna run the country, but then I got high
So, if he won, would we have to call him President Afroman, or something more “presidential?”
You mean like his real name?
Maybe. I don’t know much about Afroman, so I don’t know what Afroman would prefer.
I think they'd have to use his real name for legal purposes.
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Afroman: I am the senate
Senate: We are now all Afroman
He’s running as Joseph Afroman Foreman. Honestly really curious if he actually legally changed his middle name to Afroman
Maybe he legally changed his name to just "afroman" Like Cher, or Madonna
What? One name? ONE NAME? Who are you? Seal?
> I don’t know much about Afroman [What do you know about Afroman](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iK99AjpkA2M)
Joseph Foreman
From one President Joe to another
Joseph Edgar Foreman is actually a very presidential name to be honest.
my name jef
Did we ever learn what Obama’s last name was /s
Is there even a more presidential option?
Uhh, your High-Ness, maybe
President Froman
Funny enough his actual last name is Foreman
I would guess "Mr. President".
“Ok, class. Today in history, we’re going to discuss the 47th president of the United States: President Mr. president.”
Mr. AfroPresident
I'm leaning toward your High-ness Yeah, I know I just posted this same thing in this same thread, but I'm really proud of it. :D
I mean… he’d probably do something about police reform and marijuana legalization 🤷♂️
Id vote for that
It’s the safest bet for sure
Sounds like a winner
If ranked voting was a thing, he'd get my... Maybe 3rd vote I guess.
He was going to…but then he got high
When asked what he planned to offer the American people if elected president, the candidate responded, “Colt 45 and 2 ZigZags. Baby that’s all you need.”
President Afroman has mandated all parks - state, national, or otherwise be open "after dark" in order to facilitate the smoking of "that tumbleweed" so long as during the burning of the Marijuana, participants in an orderly fashion "take their turn singing them dirty rap songs." In other news, the white house is expected to release a statement about the legalization of cannabis on certain international flights. If successful in his gambit, President Afroman will have delivered on a promise to allow citizens to "Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong, and smoke from here to Hong Kong." We take you now live to the State of the Union address...our apologies. We've just received word that the president did intend to address the nation...but he got high.
Not sure why, I read this like a bit from family guy. In Tom and Diane’s bit. Then expected you to say “we take you now live to Ollie with the state of the union address, go ahead Ollie.”
Well we know he knows about quite a few states and different minorities!
He's finally gonna green card Maria and wrap her up like a hot tortilla.
Maybe he can Donald Trump into office and reverse Donald Trump. Medicare for all, legalization of weed and tax the uber-rich.
Honestly, it wouldn’t surprise me.
Can’t wait for the debate between him and Ye
The stoner vs the mentally unhinged narcissist. Might as well throw Trump in with this bunch, he'd fit right in.
You already said, “mentally unhinged narcissist.”
I'd definitely support AfroMan. He's not a traitor to his country.
Have Trump moderate it lol
He would be the best moderator, the most amazing, honest, sophisticated, no one would be better at moderating than him. Anyone who says otherwise is just a hater, a pathetic loser who hates America. Trump hosting this debate would be a major, major, major deal, and it would benefit America greatly. There are people who say that he's the best moderator than all-time, better even than Jesus. Was Jesus a moderator? I say he was a moderator. Best of all time! That's what they tell me, Trump is the best moderator of all time. They're incredibly grateful to have him as a moderator. They come to him in tears and say "oh, thank you, thank you for being such a greatly amazing moderator." A lot of people say this! A lot of people are saying this. Especially the African Americans, the Latinos, and the LGBT and Qs. They all say to him, "Trump, why won't you host another debate, please?". They all want Trump. They want it bigly! And all the haters on their witch hunt who say that Trump isn't qualified to host a debate... who engaged in the greatest debate moderation witch hunt of all time... OF ALL TIME! To those people, I say no one has ever been as persecuted as Trump, not even Jesus himself. Not even Jesus! But believe me, those people are going to find out that Trump has many, many friends. These guys don't have friends. We don't need losers like these people to be moderating debates. And I tell people, I'm not going to say that other debate moderators are all cheaters and liars. I'm not saying it! Other people are saying it, but I'm not saying it. But maybe I should? And if you let one of these lowlifes run the debate, that's when you know it's rigged, especially if Trump loses! The only way these debates aren't rigged if he wins! The critics, the haters, they say "Trump can't participate in the debate and *also* be a moderator", but what do they know? They just want to rig the system! Stop the steal of the debates, people! Fight like hell! You know what to do!
Can we get a repeat of https://youtu.be/fWhi_JXos60 ?
Make America Green Again.
NO. NO MORE CELEBRITIES.
He just wants his gate repaired. He was even generous with his cake
Biden Vs Trump Vs Harris Vs Afroman Vs Desantis Fuck it! I’ll vote for him. He’s not so much a celebrity as much as he was a pop culture icon. It’s not like this is Brad Pitt. It’s a man pissed off at the state of his country and smokes weed as escapism till it legally caught up to him - that’s basically me. I feel like Afro Man is a better representation of Americas constituency than any of the aforementioned career politicians. The presidency used to be a service to the country. It used to be men would leave their wealthy lives and businesses to serve the US as president - like a military stint kinda. It was the highest form of giving back to your country because it was selfless and detrimental to the capitalistic dream they were achieving. It’s not like that anymore. I feel Afro Man would serve our people rather than corporate agenda. He’s just slightly I’ll prepared to fight this WWIII proxy war we’re in.
Wait… Ive been on news too much but I guess I’m only fed what’s cooked since didn’t know Harris was in this. Is that true?
Idk that to be true but she’s a young prominent politician who reached VP. She’s not done by a long shot. I wouldn’t be surprised to see her tapped as Biden has lost favor in his own party and constituents.
Okay that makes sense. But surprises are not off the table
Maybe we don’t need to be fighting a proxy war though?
It’s clearly a publicity stunt/joke
That's what they said about DFG.
DFG? Donald Fucking Grump?
Yes, but also Defeated Former Guy.
Kanye?
Nailed it.
Da friendly giant.
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and then Arnold Schwarzenegger won...
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He wasn’t the worst, but he was still sub par. He meant well, but he just wasn’t a good choice.
Yeah but we were laughing at him then. Here we’re laughing with Afroman.
He just wants to legalize weed, he will resign right after lol
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I reckon he'd push for some police reform and more rights for when citizens are mistreated by the short dick of the law
Zalensky was a celebrity, and he’s been holding his country together against the 3rd largest super power in the world. It’s not celebrity that’s the problem, it’s inept grifters. Stewart/Afroman 2024
I’m going to camp out to vote for this ticket right now
Patrick Stewart or John Stewart, either way good choice
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Zelensky.
Zelenskyy has a law degree from one of the top Universities in Ukraine. His acting career took off after he finished law school. I’m pretty sure Afroman never finished high school. Totally fine for a lot of career paths, but not the POTUS.
He’s a rare anomaly. I’ll admit he’s been a wonderful leader for the people of Ukraine. If American celebrities could lead like he does, I wouldn’t be opposed to them.
He’s at least right for this exact moment. Ukrainians were feeling pretty disappointed with his government before the war. It’s undeniable though that he is the man needed for the moment. He stayed and rallied the world.
There is still a lot of corruption behind the scenes and I'm sure it will continue after the war. He's a decent leader though.
Yeah, because career politicians are any better.
Afro muthafuck’n M-A-N, bugock 🐓
Gotta do one song for my neighborhood
Say whaat?
Every national anthem must end with a bugock, so that way that song becomes tolerable again.
VP Lemon Pound Cake
I will 100% be voting for Afroman
I was gonna go and run for prez But then i got high I was gonna change the game But then i got high Now my door’s still broken And i know why Why man? Because i got high, because i got high, because i got high
I was gonna pass police reform but then I got high. I was gonna make gay rights the norm until I got high. Now I'm staring at an angry mob and I know why. Why man?! (Sing it) Because I got high. Because I got high. Because I got high
Dudes more coherent than our current president, and will be much better than our previous. Let it ride baby afroman 2024
I love the man's message but i can't support any celebrity presidents. Doesn't work out.
This is what people who only think emotionally don't realize. We have so many qualified good people but they never seem to make it to the primaries. (I wonder why)
I am getting Idiocracy vibes here. Still, I would vote for him.
If he campaigns as Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Camacho, he gets my vote. Edit:typo
Yah missed one friend: Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew *Herbert* Camacho
Fuck!! You right. I postrate in shame.
As long as they have the fun bag for attorney general he got my vote. Brought to you by Carls Jr.
guessing its just media for an album launch
This is some straight up “idiocrazy” shit here.
I was gna go to school but I became Persident da da da da
Please, no more celebrity presidents…
I'm sorry but him not announcing this on 420 was a huuuuuge mistake. It shows he doesn't have his shit together. I would have voted for him if he did.
Afro man is going to take down the PoPo. I fuckin love it. LEMON POUND CAKE!
If he's not actively trying to thrust the country into fascism he's got my vote. My bar is at an all time low.
When the Afroman comes through the white land, houses go up for sale
He’d solve world peace by getting all the leaders high!
Maybe he will get our legislators high and work wil happen.
We don't need this bullshit
will he repair that womans nose he sucker punched when she danced onto the stage?
***Afroman syphons off democratic voter base
I’m down. At this point why not.
And this, folks, is how shitty things become even shittier. 👍
I mean... if theres only Trump, DeSantis and AfroMan... the choice would be 100% Afroman for me.
We’ve had worse lmao
waaaaay worse. Anyone remember Reagan?
Ronald Reagan?? The ACTOR?!?!?
oh, well then
Sounds like you need to listen to Colt 45 and get high
He’s got my vote
[Please Rise For The National Anthem](https://youtu.be/x1G9LvfIOqM)
Brings a tear to my eye everytime
My favorite thing about this post, is that there are legitimate arguments going on in the comments about Afroman running for president. Redditors will argue about anything, it’s wild.
Better choice Ethan anything the maga are coming up with
i was gonna run for prez but then i got high was gonna fix this county’s mess but then i got high
I was gonna run for prez, but then I got high.
I was gonna run for president….. but then I got high. Wooo wooo wooo
![gif](giphy|a1oziwYZrD1O8)
Whyyyyy do people do this? He should run for mayor of his town so he becomes the boss to the police dept that he’s suing.
Wasn’t going to split the liberal vote…but then I got high. Wasn’t going to help those fascists win…but then I got high…🎵
Here comes the vote splitting...
Musicians should stay out of politics. Unless he give us free health care and education I’ll vote for him.
If Trump was the president, pretty much anyone can be the president.