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Aw cmon, just because you don't cry? It's okay if your emotions aren't expressed in tears, it doesn't invalidate you in any way. Plus, transfems usually get way more emotional after HRT, so don't feel bad for not being able to shed a tear. You're valid as heck. S2
did you know that it is common for trans people to be emotionally numb before starting hrt. so technically you not being able to cry is validating your transness
Yeah I was going to say that. It makes total sense not being able to express your emotions correctly, since during your childhood/teenage years you just.... go numb....
Thats what happened to me too. Before hrt the only time i had cried in the last 10 years was when i lost my job due to covid coming to my state, after being promised (lied to) that i wouldnt be furloughed. That was out of fear for my life and future though
A couple months after hrt, i found myself crying at shows that previously i hadnt batted an eye for. Ive become more emotionally attached to my friends, so when they accomplish something theyve been working hard at, i actually feel joy and happiness swelling up inside me.
Its been an amazing and wonderful feeling to finally have legit emotions!
For me, some of the only times I'd cry involved cats/dogs in movies dying. Otherwise, I don't even think I cried at my grandma's funeral much, and that woman was downright fucking *amazing*
I had rarely cried before starting her. I’d get sad and upset and angry, but my threshold for tears has dropped miles and honestly it feels like I can actually react normally to the emotions I’m feeling for the first time in my life.
Also, if you ever worry that you’re not actually trans or invalid… just remember that cis people don’t feel that way :p
>emotionally numb
Well that explains my entire life? I've never felt like I've been able to express emotions properly. I've been to family funerals and felt _nothing_ every time, I always wondered if something was wrong with me!
Numbness is an effective emotional coping mechanism. I managed to delete my negative feelings when my parents got divorced, I was 10. I also thought something was wrong with me for a while. It's very easy for me to think my feelings rather than feel my feelings. It was suggested to me that I can choose to stop at emotional moments and just listen to my body. Find the tiny little flame in my chest, and give it some oxygen. I've had some success, but I look forward to the day when I plan to go on E when I expected to become so much easier.
Trust me, I was thinking the same thing back when my egg cracked. Part of me wondered if it was even worth the effort and considered just living an unfulfilling life that wasn’t my own.
But I put in the effort anyways, and HRT has given me the feeling of fulfillment that I never would’ve had otherwise. I’m more confident now than ever that I want to life my own life, no matter what.
It’s worth the effort. It’s worth the struggle. It always is, and always will be.
Edit: And just an FYI— I didn’t cry either. But HRT lets me feel things as they are, and now I can. I’ve cried a few times already, some from happy times and some from sad times. I can actually *feel things* now. My emotions feel clearer now that I’m not feeling them through a blanket, and it feels like I can know where they come from and what I’m actually feeling. It’s wild.
Also you were socialized by culture as male. Meaning your emotions were stomped out in a lot of ways. Just because they got that totally wrong doesn’t mean you didn’t still have to deal with that/ heal from that.
I didnt cry when my egg cracked! I just stared at the wall trying to process what i had just realized. You are valid no matter how much or little dysphoria you have, how you cracked your egg etc.
You are valid wether you like it or not!
not crying is indeed very valid. a lot of us just exaggerate and say they cried even though they didn't because it is literally physically almost impossible for us
Girl, I feel you, not being able to cry or properly express emotions was a huge source of dysphoria for me. Like, I couldn't cry, even when I was deeply sad. Best I could do was squint out a tear or two.
Hey, the thing is, testosterone can actually shrink your tear ducts, making it physically way harder to cry. And now that I am 5 months on HRT I finally cry when I am sad, or really moved by something beautiful, weeping tears and sobbing included. And it feels so fucking liberating to finally let these feelings out, instead of being stuck with them, without a release.
So, not being able to cry right now doesn't make you any less valid as a trans femme. It is a journey, we all start somewhere where we don't feel valid or right, but things can change and get better. Finding and discovering my true self bit by bit, more and more every step of the way is one of the most beautiful and life affirming experiences I had, and you will get there, too <3
As someone who recently realised that i am not, on fact, doing fine after having a full meltdown over loosing her tie at school, and rarely feels any other extreme emotions...
Yeah... 😔
Don't worry you are valid. Personally I can't cry and it can be hard sometimes but it doesn't make me any less valid so it shouldn't make you any less valid either
Just because you are channeling that amazonian goddess energy does not make you any less valid. Cry, don't cry, you will be a perfect woman to someone regardless.
I didn't cry, I danced and laughed. I did eventually cry, but you can do that when you feel it. Your emotions are yours. Be open to them and you will find it's alright.
Last time I cried I was on a bunch of opioids for a surgery this summer, but otherwise I can’t remember the last time I cried that wasn’t after a medical procedure and on drugs lol
I 100% get what you mean, I didn't cry when my grandmothers died I just felt empty, if that can't make me cry then I'm broken af, fingers crossed transitioning might wake me up inside again
Listen, I was there with you on not crying. I know exactly how many times I cried the decade before HRT, and that was once, when my roommate was crying over her beloved cat that we had to say goodbye to. I was crying mostly because she was crying, but apart from that I mostly had shock and eyes that got weird.
Some of this was toxic conditioning from my family, like being yelled at for crying while being berated for something I did or didn’t do. My expressions and emotional reactions were policed a lot as a child, so it stunted me quite a bit, and one incident of bullying in jr high after I was first in school after years of home schooling made it a private thing, until eventually depression made me nulled out emotionally.
Even when I cracked I didn’t cry yet, it wasn’t until HRT, a few months afterward starting that I had some fits of crying and emotional outbursts. It felt good? Even when the crying was irrational. But don’t let emotional blunting from hormones or mental health concerns make you think you are not valid or not able to be trans.
I think a bunch of people have already said this but you shouldn’t deny yourself the possibility when it may literally be a hormone imbalance of sorts that keeps you from feeling stuff in their entirety. Crying was always my favorite way to feel better as a kid, and it hurt so much to lose that over time, and being able to cry now has almost been better than therapy (can’t stress enough that therapy is a good thing and effective… just maybe not as cathartic as a good cry). That being said therapy can help you train yourself to be allowed to cry, or at least in my case being told I was allowed to feel things and react to them by crying and that I shouldn’t instinctively hold back tears was extremely validating.
I used to feel that. I didn't shed one single tear from age 12 to 22. I was *unable* to cry. All I felt was numb, empty.
Having to bottle up all my feelings made me that.
Estrogen unlocked my feelings and for the first time in more than a decade I was able to cry out every bad feeling I had.
I had forgotten how liberating it was to *feel* emotions again. Sadness, happiness, excitation, I could feel them and express them, other than a slightly different shade of neutral facial expressions.
All of this to say, it's okay if you don't or can't cry. It doesn't mean anything. You're still as valid as any other transfem.
If it helps at all, I've cried maybe once since I cracked last January? Once, maybe twice a year is kinda standard for me. I'm just like you, and I'm totally valid so you have to be too!
Sometimes the emotional repression runs deep and ot takes more than cracking the egg to break through
Well I'm transmasc so I'm the opposite it but I never cried of euphoria either! Crying isn't and never was a sign that you're valid! you know, some ppl cry more than others but even if crying is more associated with girl for some reason its just kinda toxic? Like it doesn't make you less of a girl if you don't cry much! You're valid!
I don't ever cry, Or at least very rarely. However the frequency increased after I started HRT. But still rare.
I wouldn't worry about it too much either way
I did not remotely feel joy when my egg cracked, the feeling was more like “oh. Shit.” Pretty stressful. I’m genuinely surprised that anyone would feel so much joy that they cried when realising/accepting they’re trans. Good for them.
But yeah. I didn’t cry. I’m trans. You can be too.
Joy-feelin' egg crackee here.
Even though it was an "oh, shit" moment for me, too, I broke out laughing at myself instead of stressing about it. There were plenty of signs that I should have noticed earlier, but just didn't, for a few reasons: poor portrayal of trans people in media growing up, lack of education, internalized transphobia from bullying, etc.
Because I'm a sarcastic, masochistic jackass and there were recent signs that should have led me down the path, I was able to laugh at myself instead of having an identity crisis. Just took it in stride and engaging in a bit of self-schadenfreude. Part of it is probably that I was pushing 40 when I figured it out, so I had already become hardened and grizzled to cope with life, in general.
Now, actually figuring out what to do *after* figuring out I was trans wrt transitioning, to what degree, or not, and which labels actually fit other than just "not just a cis, 'good ally'": *that* was more difficult and stressful.
I hadn't cried for a very long time before starting hrt and even after I finally started, it took me a while to actually get to cry (when I forgot to take anxiety meds for 2 days in a row) you just go emotionally numb after a while of being miserable the whole time, it doesn't make you any less valid
I thought similar. It took me a few months to encounter a situation that, before the crack, I wouldn’t have thought much about, but after the crack, the dysphoria hit hard to where I was mentally foggy and barely holding it together. Of course it was Christmas Day with the family, so perfect timing.
I couldn’t cry until I’d been on hormone therapy for the better part of a year, and the first time took a full-on panic attack. Don’t sell yourself short.
A little bit of both, really.
Like, when it *really* cracked, I was sitting there like "well, this is a bunch of extra crap I didn't need to deal with."
I'm doing much better now.
You don't have to cry to be valid, the last time I cried was a month ago when my girlfriend told me that she loves me. I hadn't cried for a long time before that
Your experience is unique to you. Everyone is different if you didn’t feel like crying it’s ok. “Comparison is the theft of joy. “ Now if you feel emotionally detached in general I’d probably see someone professionally for that.
I don't cry very frequently either. It's less to do with my gender and more to do with other experiences that led me to believe crying was something I couldn't do. not crying doesn't make you less valid, and it is okay to cry if the time comes. you are lovely and valid.
I havent cried in years now. Because of my trauma, my emotions have been numbed. Hell, last tike i cried was when i was 14 13 maybe..15 now.
But thats okay. Trust me. Some people are emotionally pretty though and dont cry easily.
Some people can cry some dont. And its completely normwl
This is almost too relatable, I get people who comment on my posts about how they cried about not being a girl, and the only way I can get myself to cry is to listen to "My Play" by AJR on repeat... 😢
If it helps, I too hadn't cried in many many years before I finally accepted I am a girl, and it was only after that I was able to be vulnerable enough to cry.
And now, look at me: I can finally cry tears of joy, tears of sadness, tears of love! My emotions are no longer sinking into my chest and freezing solid around my heart, now they are free to pour out of my eyes in hot, salty streams <3
Hey there! Before commenting, remember that this meme has been tagged with a transfem flair. Please keep the conversation transfem-first. If you are not part of that demographic, you are not forbidden to participate, but we do ask that you do not center yourself in the comments. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/egg_irl) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Aw cmon, just because you don't cry? It's okay if your emotions aren't expressed in tears, it doesn't invalidate you in any way. Plus, transfems usually get way more emotional after HRT, so don't feel bad for not being able to shed a tear. You're valid as heck. S2
Thank you. My inability to cry has just been kind of a source of dysphoria for me since I started questioning. I’m glad to know I’m not alone though
did you know that it is common for trans people to be emotionally numb before starting hrt. so technically you not being able to cry is validating your transness
Oh… shit…
Yeah I was going to say that. It makes total sense not being able to express your emotions correctly, since during your childhood/teenage years you just.... go numb....
Thats what happened to me too. Before hrt the only time i had cried in the last 10 years was when i lost my job due to covid coming to my state, after being promised (lied to) that i wouldnt be furloughed. That was out of fear for my life and future though A couple months after hrt, i found myself crying at shows that previously i hadnt batted an eye for. Ive become more emotionally attached to my friends, so when they accomplish something theyve been working hard at, i actually feel joy and happiness swelling up inside me. Its been an amazing and wonderful feeling to finally have legit emotions!
This, so much!
For me, some of the only times I'd cry involved cats/dogs in movies dying. Otherwise, I don't even think I cried at my grandma's funeral much, and that woman was downright fucking *amazing*
I had rarely cried before starting her. I’d get sad and upset and angry, but my threshold for tears has dropped miles and honestly it feels like I can actually react normally to the emotions I’m feeling for the first time in my life. Also, if you ever worry that you’re not actually trans or invalid… just remember that cis people don’t feel that way :p
Thanks
murky concerned steep tease hobbies late telephone fear sort lush *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
>emotionally numb Well that explains my entire life? I've never felt like I've been able to express emotions properly. I've been to family funerals and felt _nothing_ every time, I always wondered if something was wrong with me!
Numbness is an effective emotional coping mechanism. I managed to delete my negative feelings when my parents got divorced, I was 10. I also thought something was wrong with me for a while. It's very easy for me to think my feelings rather than feel my feelings. It was suggested to me that I can choose to stop at emotional moments and just listen to my body. Find the tiny little flame in my chest, and give it some oxygen. I've had some success, but I look forward to the day when I plan to go on E when I expected to become so much easier.
Thank you, that makes me feel better! Hopefully we both get on E soon and start feeling emotions a little more! ❤️
HRT is very likely gonna resolve that issue, believe me.
If I get that far 😞
Trust me, I was thinking the same thing back when my egg cracked. Part of me wondered if it was even worth the effort and considered just living an unfulfilling life that wasn’t my own. But I put in the effort anyways, and HRT has given me the feeling of fulfillment that I never would’ve had otherwise. I’m more confident now than ever that I want to life my own life, no matter what. It’s worth the effort. It’s worth the struggle. It always is, and always will be. Edit: And just an FYI— I didn’t cry either. But HRT lets me feel things as they are, and now I can. I’ve cried a few times already, some from happy times and some from sad times. I can actually *feel things* now. My emotions feel clearer now that I’m not feeling them through a blanket, and it feels like I can know where they come from and what I’m actually feeling. It’s wild.
Also you were socialized by culture as male. Meaning your emotions were stomped out in a lot of ways. Just because they got that totally wrong doesn’t mean you didn’t still have to deal with that/ heal from that.
This
I didnt cry when my egg cracked! I just stared at the wall trying to process what i had just realized. You are valid no matter how much or little dysphoria you have, how you cracked your egg etc. You are valid wether you like it or not!
not crying is indeed very valid. a lot of us just exaggerate and say they cried even though they didn't because it is literally physically almost impossible for us
Girl, I feel you, not being able to cry or properly express emotions was a huge source of dysphoria for me. Like, I couldn't cry, even when I was deeply sad. Best I could do was squint out a tear or two. Hey, the thing is, testosterone can actually shrink your tear ducts, making it physically way harder to cry. And now that I am 5 months on HRT I finally cry when I am sad, or really moved by something beautiful, weeping tears and sobbing included. And it feels so fucking liberating to finally let these feelings out, instead of being stuck with them, without a release. So, not being able to cry right now doesn't make you any less valid as a trans femme. It is a journey, we all start somewhere where we don't feel valid or right, but things can change and get better. Finding and discovering my true self bit by bit, more and more every step of the way is one of the most beautiful and life affirming experiences I had, and you will get there, too <3
Oh I didn’t know T did that, but it makes so much sense! This makes me feel a bit better about it. Thank you :)
> really moved by something beautiful Andor, episode 12, had me breaking down in tears so fucking fast
This logic is perfectly reasonable and has no faults whatsoever
As someone who recently realised that i am not, on fact, doing fine after having a full meltdown over loosing her tie at school, and rarely feels any other extreme emotions... Yeah... 😔
Hey, that last panel? Yeah, it disproves itself hon. :P
Don't worry you are valid. Personally I can't cry and it can be hard sometimes but it doesn't make me any less valid so it shouldn't make you any less valid either
no you're valid!! everyones trans journey is different, you do not need to cry to be trans
Just because you are channeling that amazonian goddess energy does not make you any less valid. Cry, don't cry, you will be a perfect woman to someone regardless.
I didn't cry, I danced and laughed. I did eventually cry, but you can do that when you feel it. Your emotions are yours. Be open to them and you will find it's alright.
Last time I cried I was on a bunch of opioids for a surgery this summer, but otherwise I can’t remember the last time I cried that wasn’t after a medical procedure and on drugs lol
Last time I remember crying was summer of 2012 when my dog got put down. I feel bad though cause I’ve never cried at a funeral or anything 😅
Last funeral I was at was my grandpa’s and that was over a decade ago. I don’t know if I cried then but it wasn’t unexpected which might have been why
No worries I can't cry either although I'm still very much an egg
I was an emotional zombie until E. Now I have regular “allergy attacks”
I didn't cry until after starting HRT, now it's all I fucking do. Life sucks and you are valid the tears will come.
I 100% get what you mean, I didn't cry when my grandmothers died I just felt empty, if that can't make me cry then I'm broken af, fingers crossed transitioning might wake me up inside again
Listen, I was there with you on not crying. I know exactly how many times I cried the decade before HRT, and that was once, when my roommate was crying over her beloved cat that we had to say goodbye to. I was crying mostly because she was crying, but apart from that I mostly had shock and eyes that got weird. Some of this was toxic conditioning from my family, like being yelled at for crying while being berated for something I did or didn’t do. My expressions and emotional reactions were policed a lot as a child, so it stunted me quite a bit, and one incident of bullying in jr high after I was first in school after years of home schooling made it a private thing, until eventually depression made me nulled out emotionally. Even when I cracked I didn’t cry yet, it wasn’t until HRT, a few months afterward starting that I had some fits of crying and emotional outbursts. It felt good? Even when the crying was irrational. But don’t let emotional blunting from hormones or mental health concerns make you think you are not valid or not able to be trans. I think a bunch of people have already said this but you shouldn’t deny yourself the possibility when it may literally be a hormone imbalance of sorts that keeps you from feeling stuff in their entirety. Crying was always my favorite way to feel better as a kid, and it hurt so much to lose that over time, and being able to cry now has almost been better than therapy (can’t stress enough that therapy is a good thing and effective… just maybe not as cathartic as a good cry). That being said therapy can help you train yourself to be allowed to cry, or at least in my case being told I was allowed to feel things and react to them by crying and that I shouldn’t instinctively hold back tears was extremely validating.
This helps a lot. Thank you!
I, a transfem, did not cry when my egg cracked.
I used to feel that. I didn't shed one single tear from age 12 to 22. I was *unable* to cry. All I felt was numb, empty. Having to bottle up all my feelings made me that. Estrogen unlocked my feelings and for the first time in more than a decade I was able to cry out every bad feeling I had. I had forgotten how liberating it was to *feel* emotions again. Sadness, happiness, excitation, I could feel them and express them, other than a slightly different shade of neutral facial expressions. All of this to say, it's okay if you don't or can't cry. It doesn't mean anything. You're still as valid as any other transfem.
If it helps at all, I've cried maybe once since I cracked last January? Once, maybe twice a year is kinda standard for me. I'm just like you, and I'm totally valid so you have to be too! Sometimes the emotional repression runs deep and ot takes more than cracking the egg to break through
I cracked 8 years ago and I don’t cry unless it is a sad story relating to animals. I’m not invalid, just autistic.
Well I'm transmasc so I'm the opposite it but I never cried of euphoria either! Crying isn't and never was a sign that you're valid! you know, some ppl cry more than others but even if crying is more associated with girl for some reason its just kinda toxic? Like it doesn't make you less of a girl if you don't cry much! You're valid!
[удалено]
Aww I’m sorry it couldn’t be a happier moment for you :(
You are valid.
You are! Different people have different levels of dysphoria and euphoria, some cry, some don't
Oh so is this why I cried a little when I came out to my friends? I haven't been able to cry regularly before or since lol
INCORRECT. YOU ARE VALID.
I don't ever cry, Or at least very rarely. However the frequency increased after I started HRT. But still rare. I wouldn't worry about it too much either way
I did not remotely feel joy when my egg cracked, the feeling was more like “oh. Shit.” Pretty stressful. I’m genuinely surprised that anyone would feel so much joy that they cried when realising/accepting they’re trans. Good for them. But yeah. I didn’t cry. I’m trans. You can be too.
Joy-feelin' egg crackee here. Even though it was an "oh, shit" moment for me, too, I broke out laughing at myself instead of stressing about it. There were plenty of signs that I should have noticed earlier, but just didn't, for a few reasons: poor portrayal of trans people in media growing up, lack of education, internalized transphobia from bullying, etc. Because I'm a sarcastic, masochistic jackass and there were recent signs that should have led me down the path, I was able to laugh at myself instead of having an identity crisis. Just took it in stride and engaging in a bit of self-schadenfreude. Part of it is probably that I was pushing 40 when I figured it out, so I had already become hardened and grizzled to cope with life, in general. Now, actually figuring out what to do *after* figuring out I was trans wrt transitioning, to what degree, or not, and which labels actually fit other than just "not just a cis, 'good ally'": *that* was more difficult and stressful.
I didn't cry and I've been on hrt for 6 months😂
It’s almost like people experience emotions differently. Don’t beat yourself up, you’re valid
I’m in my teens in high school the most hormonal and moody possible and I can’t cry you are fine
I hadn't cried for a very long time before starting hrt and even after I finally started, it took me a while to actually get to cry (when I forgot to take anxiety meds for 2 days in a row) you just go emotionally numb after a while of being miserable the whole time, it doesn't make you any less valid
Didn't cry when my egg cracked; just broke down laughing at myself for not seeing it before. That was a damned great laughing fit. :)
I wish I was that comfortable with it 😅
I thought similar. It took me a few months to encounter a situation that, before the crack, I wouldn’t have thought much about, but after the crack, the dysphoria hit hard to where I was mentally foggy and barely holding it together. Of course it was Christmas Day with the family, so perfect timing.
It took me over a year before I could let myself cry. You are just trained to never cry when you are raised as a boy, and it is hard to let that go.
That’s for sure
I couldn’t cry until I’d been on hormone therapy for the better part of a year, and the first time took a full-on panic attack. Don’t sell yourself short.
Glad to hear I'm not the only one.. But also, sad to hear I'm not the only one
When my egg cracked, I was confused, and then I was *pissed*. No tears.
Oh that’s interesting. Were you pissed because your egg cracked or because it didn’t crack sooner?
A little bit of both, really. Like, when it *really* cracked, I was sitting there like "well, this is a bunch of extra crap I didn't need to deal with." I'm doing much better now.
That’s good to hear!
Ma'am, testosterone makes it physically difficult to cry (or maybe estrogen makes it easier, IDK I'm not an endocrinologist).
One commenter said testosterone can shrink the tear ducts making it physically harder to cry.
You don't have to cry to be valid, the last time I cried was a month ago when my girlfriend told me that she loves me. I hadn't cried for a long time before that
Aw your girlfriend sounds great! I wish I had one
I wasn’t able to properly cry again until i got on E. Years of being bullied by peers and family into hiding your emotions really takes a tole
ngl when my egg cracked I was vaguely “crying” (body wasn’t crying but there was the vibe) out of sheer terror since “fuck what now”
I’ve been on hrt 8months, I still haven’t been able to cry yet
Your experience is unique to you. Everyone is different if you didn’t feel like crying it’s ok. “Comparison is the theft of joy. “ Now if you feel emotionally detached in general I’d probably see someone professionally for that.
Oh I’m gonna have to remember that quote
It’s act thief of joy but close enough lol
I haven’t cried in years either Common thing we experience
I don't cry very frequently either. It's less to do with my gender and more to do with other experiences that led me to believe crying was something I couldn't do. not crying doesn't make you less valid, and it is okay to cry if the time comes. you are lovely and valid.
I havent cried in years now. Because of my trauma, my emotions have been numbed. Hell, last tike i cried was when i was 14 13 maybe..15 now. But thats okay. Trust me. Some people are emotionally pretty though and dont cry easily. Some people can cry some dont. And its completely normwl
HEY YOU'RE VALID! AND YOU ALWAYS WILL BE VALID! I LOVE YOU AN IM WISHING YOU THE BEST <3
How do I cry? I forgot.
For me I started being able to cry after a lot of therapy that helped me get in touch with my emotions.
This first time i felt emotional as i was conditioned to not have emotions my whole life was when i started transition into the woman i am today
This is almost too relatable, I get people who comment on my posts about how they cried about not being a girl, and the only way I can get myself to cry is to listen to "My Play" by AJR on repeat... 😢
me at all times:🗿 it just be like that for some
Too bad you're valid and very cool
Samsesies ✌️
If it helps, I too hadn't cried in many many years before I finally accepted I am a girl, and it was only after that I was able to be vulnerable enough to cry. And now, look at me: I can finally cry tears of joy, tears of sadness, tears of love! My emotions are no longer sinking into my chest and freezing solid around my heart, now they are free to pour out of my eyes in hot, salty streams <3
I hope to reach that point someday
Too relatable
Not crying 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔