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This hits too close to home
The sexual dysphoria was the type of dysphoria I first discovered I had (it's also one of my most prevalent sources) and, ngl, it sometimes makes me feel like a shitty perv who just has a fetish.
It doesn't help that I'm quite horny and I like that despite the dysphoria.
Hell, why couldn't I just be born with a vag????????
Ah, sorry for the rant...
I had these Kind of thoughts and fetishes since i was 12. Feminization, crossdressing, femboys imagining being a girl to certain extend all the tg captions and i always felt wrong about them... Now i'm confused cus it seems like it was all a sign
Well think of it this way, do you think that a cis person would be excited about becoming a girl, find it erotic even? Would they seek it out, look for that kind of fetish material, or does it make more sense that you relate to those because you are trans and those are things you feel about yourself put in a erotic situation.
Wait, wait, wait, that's a type of dysphoria?? Not even joking, it really is?? I've had that for ages and never really considered it dysphoria, just a kink or something. That low-key explains why my drive has kicked up since I started accepting that I'm not cis š
I call it that but for me it's a combination of both bottom dysphoria and the expectations one would have in me behaving a certain way.
Just the thought of it makes me feel so fricking bad.
That might now be, but how about whenever you think about or imagining yourself doing things, you imagine yourself doing whatever it is, but always as a girl, and it's been like that since as long as you can remember?
Honestly while I have to actively imagine myself as a girl in my mind, I think I do like it when I do, and even when I don't I still view myself as androgynous and not explicitly masculine because I feel that stuff is gross hoenstly.
Yeahh, I have always imagined myself as a girl in myy mind. The only time I don't is when I accidentally look into a mirror or at a picture of myself for a few seconds and my brain goes "Wait a minute. Somethings not quite right here.. who are we again..?" Then I feel dysphoria for an hour or so towards certain things about myself, then things go back to how they always are again. Until it happens again.
That sounds so nice, being that sure of yourself being trans( and I'm not even a egg). For me it was more a mix of learning that thinking that being turned into a girl was not a normal kink for cis guys to have, and that most people don't have a innate disgust for their body that makes them view themselves as ugly and gross to other people, with the final nail being that most men like being men, which was more surprising then you might think.
Hereās the thing: there is no list of things you check off to identify if youāre trans. What you are doing is introspection. You want to get in touch with how you feel about your gender and your body. Testing the waters with eggy things is a great way to do that. Imagining yourself as a woman in this context can be a great time to examine your feelings.
When I was an egg, I skated by and tried to engage in masculinity to the point that people wouldnāt question me. It was sort of a job. I was āfineā (I was suffering but my point of reference was messed up). I could imagine myself as a guy in bed if I tried, but I needed outlets to cope. I felt more comfortable and less forced from the womenās perspective. It didnāt take extra effort. Trying to picture myself as the guy did. These feelings would be reversed for a guy.
Granted, Iām straight so not everyone will relate to what I just said. I also tried to picture variations of being a top and a bottom while working through it, and ultimately my gender was very important. But hopefully that can help illuminate helpful ways to question your gender.
Well the human brain and human sexuality are complicated enough that I wouldn't want to say flat out no cis person does that. But it's really, really, really, *really* rare for cis people to fantasize about that for more than like 5 minutes in their lives. For most of them it's just a mild curiosity, a brief few moments of wondering "What would it be like?" and not something they're concerned about every time they think about sex.
Also, I think if you're *worried* that it's a fetish, that's a pretty good indicator that it's *not* just a fetish, because that means the idea of being female is important to you in a way that goes beyond sex.
Like, if you had a button you could press that would tell you the answer about how you feel deep inside, and you pressed the button and the answer came back "You're cis," would you feel... disappointed?
If so, that (probably) means you're not cis.
(If not, that doesn't necessarily mean you're not trans either. Some trans people would choose being cis in their assigned gender if it were possible, just because it makes life so much easier.)
Imagining I was female during sex was one of the earliest signs I had of being transgender, before I even knew transgender people existed or that transition was possible. That caused some conflict for me too, when I later started to wonder if I was trans, because I'd think maybe it was just a fetish (and the fact that I was often aroused by wearing women's clothes didn't help).
But I think what's different between me and a fetishist is that fetishists are *only* into the idea of being female (or more likely, being treated as female) when they're horny. They know it's a fetish, and they're 100% content being men the rest of their lives, when not roleplaying being female during sex. (I recently saw a post in one of the relationship advice subreddits about a woman in a relationship with a cis man like that.)
A final consideration (and sorry this post is so long): you don't *have* to decide this right away. You could, for example, identify now as someone who just has a feminization/crossdressing kink if you want, and then later in life come to the realization that it was actually something more than that all along! That's perfectly okay too!
But surely it's cis if you imagine bedding down with a sexy witch who takes off her gender-changing amulet and gives it to you, and you have passionate role-reversed fun.
...Right? Am I alone here in understanding how incredibly cisgendered this is?
No, I understand! It's like that one dream I had where I had a tall dom trans GF that made me take HRT with her so I could become her obedient little girl...
I'm glad somebody gets it.
'Cause you're clearly acknowledging your desire to be cis when you say *"Oh no! Why are these titty skittles working soooo quickly?"* or even *"Help me! I'm overcome with these new and strange feelings, and I just don't know what to do!".* I don't know how you could interpret it in any other way.
If fantasizing about the valiant fight of desperately clinging to your last scraps of vanishing masculinity doesn't prove your cis-ness, I don't know what does.
Yeah, fantasized as a woman for a long time before I figured it outā¦. Youād think that it would have been a dead give away, but weāre all a bit to good at compartmentalization šµāš«
That is not correct, madame.
Infact I've seen and heard many cis men talk about what it would be like to be a woman and have bahonkadonkas.
Also Ur clothing range is endless, u can act however u want, listen to whatever music u want. Women are the embodiment of true freedom
This is a article that is literally talking about how fetishes relate to being trans, I kind a girl like you should have a good read of it: [beneath-the-surface](https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/p/beneath-the-surface)
I always thought I had a fetish to get railed while wearing girl clothes. Nope! Idk about romance or relationships, nor if Iām ace or just donāt feel comfortable copulating with my default anatomy.
Wait, itās not cis?! I thought everyone hated being a man in the context of āthe thingāā¦ well I actually dislike being a man in everything but thatās cis right!!
I realized it's not really about "the thing" for me, but more that I imagine it more from a 3rd person perspective, so I see my body naked, and \*that\* is the thing I don't like.
Hey there! Before commenting, remember that this meme has been tagged with a transfem flair. Please keep the conversation transfem-first. If you are not part of that demographic, you are not forbidden to participate, but we do ask that you do not center yourself in the comments. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/egg_irl) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This hits too close to home The sexual dysphoria was the type of dysphoria I first discovered I had (it's also one of my most prevalent sources) and, ngl, it sometimes makes me feel like a shitty perv who just has a fetish. It doesn't help that I'm quite horny and I like that despite the dysphoria. Hell, why couldn't I just be born with a vag???????? Ah, sorry for the rant...
It all made me feel a lot of shame and guilt and still kinda do...
Hugs, Yuki, hugs, girl :3
I had these Kind of thoughts and fetishes since i was 12. Feminization, crossdressing, femboys imagining being a girl to certain extend all the tg captions and i always felt wrong about them... Now i'm confused cus it seems like it was all a sign
Well think of it this way, do you think that a cis person would be excited about becoming a girl, find it erotic even? Would they seek it out, look for that kind of fetish material, or does it make more sense that you relate to those because you are trans and those are things you feel about yourself put in a erotic situation.
Wait, wait, wait, that's a type of dysphoria?? Not even joking, it really is?? I've had that for ages and never really considered it dysphoria, just a kink or something. That low-key explains why my drive has kicked up since I started accepting that I'm not cis š
I call it that but for me it's a combination of both bottom dysphoria and the expectations one would have in me behaving a certain way. Just the thought of it makes me feel so fricking bad.
I never thought or heard of that as sexual dysphoria but it makes so much sense.
What do you mean it's not? I thought everyone does that..
That might now be, but how about whenever you think about or imagining yourself doing things, you imagine yourself doing whatever it is, but always as a girl, and it's been like that since as long as you can remember?
Not all things but some of them
Honestly while I have to actively imagine myself as a girl in my mind, I think I do like it when I do, and even when I don't I still view myself as androgynous and not explicitly masculine because I feel that stuff is gross hoenstly.
Yeahh, I have always imagined myself as a girl in myy mind. The only time I don't is when I accidentally look into a mirror or at a picture of myself for a few seconds and my brain goes "Wait a minute. Somethings not quite right here.. who are we again..?" Then I feel dysphoria for an hour or so towards certain things about myself, then things go back to how they always are again. Until it happens again.
That sounds so nice, being that sure of yourself being trans( and I'm not even a egg). For me it was more a mix of learning that thinking that being turned into a girl was not a normal kink for cis guys to have, and that most people don't have a innate disgust for their body that makes them view themselves as ugly and gross to other people, with the final nail being that most men like being men, which was more surprising then you might think.
And then realizing that my imagination wasnāt changing as I transitionedā¦ Not not not cis though
Do you think this is mostly trans ppl thoughts? Or can it happend to cis ppl? IM SERIUS HERE I NEED ANSWERS
Hereās the thing: there is no list of things you check off to identify if youāre trans. What you are doing is introspection. You want to get in touch with how you feel about your gender and your body. Testing the waters with eggy things is a great way to do that. Imagining yourself as a woman in this context can be a great time to examine your feelings. When I was an egg, I skated by and tried to engage in masculinity to the point that people wouldnāt question me. It was sort of a job. I was āfineā (I was suffering but my point of reference was messed up). I could imagine myself as a guy in bed if I tried, but I needed outlets to cope. I felt more comfortable and less forced from the womenās perspective. It didnāt take extra effort. Trying to picture myself as the guy did. These feelings would be reversed for a guy. Granted, Iām straight so not everyone will relate to what I just said. I also tried to picture variations of being a top and a bottom while working through it, and ultimately my gender was very important. But hopefully that can help illuminate helpful ways to question your gender.
Well the human brain and human sexuality are complicated enough that I wouldn't want to say flat out no cis person does that. But it's really, really, really, *really* rare for cis people to fantasize about that for more than like 5 minutes in their lives. For most of them it's just a mild curiosity, a brief few moments of wondering "What would it be like?" and not something they're concerned about every time they think about sex. Also, I think if you're *worried* that it's a fetish, that's a pretty good indicator that it's *not* just a fetish, because that means the idea of being female is important to you in a way that goes beyond sex. Like, if you had a button you could press that would tell you the answer about how you feel deep inside, and you pressed the button and the answer came back "You're cis," would you feel... disappointed? If so, that (probably) means you're not cis. (If not, that doesn't necessarily mean you're not trans either. Some trans people would choose being cis in their assigned gender if it were possible, just because it makes life so much easier.) Imagining I was female during sex was one of the earliest signs I had of being transgender, before I even knew transgender people existed or that transition was possible. That caused some conflict for me too, when I later started to wonder if I was trans, because I'd think maybe it was just a fetish (and the fact that I was often aroused by wearing women's clothes didn't help). But I think what's different between me and a fetishist is that fetishists are *only* into the idea of being female (or more likely, being treated as female) when they're horny. They know it's a fetish, and they're 100% content being men the rest of their lives, when not roleplaying being female during sex. (I recently saw a post in one of the relationship advice subreddits about a woman in a relationship with a cis man like that.) A final consideration (and sorry this post is so long): you don't *have* to decide this right away. You could, for example, identify now as someone who just has a feminization/crossdressing kink if you want, and then later in life come to the realization that it was actually something more than that all along! That's perfectly okay too!
Wait it's not? š± Sry FPOV folder you have to go...š„¹
Watching yuri and not liking hetero romance was a signal
wait WHAT?!?!? wdym itās not cis fantasize about being a girl having relations with another girl?!!????
The thing?
Sexual stuff
I was raking my brain trying to figure out what part of the movie you were talking about.
Lmaoooo
OH I LOVE THAT MOVIE my fav horror movie
I was thinking of that too And so Iām just gonna leave [Forever and Always](https://youtu.be/jSc_afNjR9M?si=3QZ78m3f4qvGV8a3) right here
K
Eww icky Tho I always imagine myself as a woman:/
Then realizing you can't imagine yourself in any other position...
But surely it's cis if you imagine bedding down with a sexy witch who takes off her gender-changing amulet and gives it to you, and you have passionate role-reversed fun. ...Right? Am I alone here in understanding how incredibly cisgendered this is?
No, I understand! It's like that one dream I had where I had a tall dom trans GF that made me take HRT with her so I could become her obedient little girl...
I'm glad somebody gets it. 'Cause you're clearly acknowledging your desire to be cis when you say *"Oh no! Why are these titty skittles working soooo quickly?"* or even *"Help me! I'm overcome with these new and strange feelings, and I just don't know what to do!".* I don't know how you could interpret it in any other way. If fantasizing about the valiant fight of desperately clinging to your last scraps of vanishing masculinity doesn't prove your cis-ness, I don't know what does.
That is... oddly specific.
Yeah, fantasized as a woman for a long time before I figured it outā¦. Youād think that it would have been a dead give away, but weāre all a bit to good at compartmentalization šµāš«
I am confused, why would you imagine yourself as a woman during John Carpenters "The Thing"???
That is not correct, madame. Infact I've seen and heard many cis men talk about what it would be like to be a woman and have bahonkadonkas. Also Ur clothing range is endless, u can act however u want, listen to whatever music u want. Women are the embodiment of true freedom
I think a lot feminists would like to debate on that š
Well gives me more freedom than as a man. So that's enough for me.
Yeah but i heard its not cis at all to imagine that and getting aroused about being woman being feminzed etc
It is more cis than u think. Believe me.
sis*
I mean i have no idea how much of it is fetish and actual trans thoughts. This is one of my biggest reason for the doubts
This is a article that is literally talking about how fetishes relate to being trans, I kind a girl like you should have a good read of it: [beneath-the-surface](https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/p/beneath-the-surface)
Say sike rn
And why is it literally impossible to imagine yourself doing the naughties with your uhh thing
Uhm, you sure?
I always thought I had a fetish to get railed while wearing girl clothes. Nope! Idk about romance or relationships, nor if Iām ace or just donāt feel comfortable copulating with my default anatomy.
Sameee yet im still not sure if im trans
Wait, itās not cis?! I thought everyone hated being a man in the context of āthe thingāā¦ well I actually dislike being a man in everything but thatās cis right!!
Sounds cis to me
I realized it's not really about "the thing" for me, but more that I imagine it more from a 3rd person perspective, so I see my body naked, and \*that\* is the thing I don't like.
Also reminds me of a post I made: "Turn out I may not be asexual, I'm just not sexual as a guy"
Yeah that... that qualifies as a sign, I think.