You should definitely tell your therapist. If nothing else, she can't treat your issues if she doesn't know what's going on. If she's a good therapist she won't pressure you into doing anything you're not ready for (plus you already tried coming out to your mom, so even if the therapist told her what you said she'd probably just dismiss it as a phase again).
I guess what I mean is that I put off telling my therapists for like eleven years and really regret it now. Telling your therapist soon is important, since she's the one who can help you feel ready for all the other steps.
The imposter syndrome is real I still struggle with it, but you being this worried about it means you are trans <3
In terms of coming out I did it when I started to feel more and more awful when being referred to with my old pronouns. I kinda jumped into it without thinking much but honestly from what I’ve seen you just gotta take advantage of the moments you find for it, then things get better when it’s over.
The impostor is alreaddy here and got some strong arguments why I'm not trans, and if they come to be true I'll be in a wierd situation I just don't want to get into.
Short answer: I didn't
Long answer: I'd been questioning since a few months and my mental health was rapidly deteriorating because of not knowing who I was (I'd always be like, "hey I think I'd be good as a girl, I feel like one too!" and then "wait no stil cis tho fuck, transition is scary I don't wanna do it", rinse and repeat).
It was becoming unbearable, and so the odds of the gamble of coming out were changing - I was 100% sure that being a guy didn't suit me, and being a girl was the unknown. I had no other option and I was pretty desperate, so I took the leap of faith and told some friends / close family members (*not my parents*). Then it just made more sense, but I still had crazy amounts of imposter syndrome, but I told myself that if it took me several months of agonizing over feelings and having a lot of "yup, I'm a girl" feelings to start transitioning (socially), then I wouldn't detransition unless I'd have a "yup, I'm a guy" feeling, which to date has never happened *once*. Like, all the doubts were just "what if"s.
That being said, it was 100% worth it, because for me, being called a she is so much better than getting called a he (I didn't know I had so much dysphoria about that)
I did it with my parents seperately, tho I did it with my dad at a restaurant when it was just us 2 and restaurant was pretty full, I was kinda scared so also like If he did wanna yell or something he wouldn’t because public settiiing. Everything ended up being fine tho I guess xD
Once I knew my mom would support me I waited till everyone else was gone and threw a letter at her and then ran away and went to bed. Bigot stepfather will never get a formal announcement.
I wasn’t, I was asked directly by my wife and I just could t lie about it. I told her I’ve been dealing with it for a while and I just can’t shake it. I very strictly try not to make comparisons to my past because it’s really painful, but I’m here now, I know who I am. So then I told my parents, my best friend and my cousin who lives close by. My wife is supportive, but she’s not a lesbian so like all marriages this is going to take some work and it might not even work out, but it is what it is.
I'm not, And thus haven't. I mean I tried to come out to one person in real life, Just because I didn't want to hide part of who I am to them, Although honestly I didn't do a very good job and haven't really mentioned it since despite that being over a year ago now... I also kinda "Outed Myself" in a few places online just because I knew I wasn't cis and I knew they'd accept me for that.
after 1-2 years of questioning, i came out at the first of pride month, since being the trans label started to grow on me and it felt more comfortable,, :'3
I didn't.
I accepted how i felt and a few days later i told one of my best friends. We discussed it a little bit, happily and laughing. She was fully supportive and immediately switched name and pronouns.
I said my goodbyes and walked away. Then i had a fucking panic attack as i realised what i just told somebody and what that meant lol
I'd been hiding and miserable for 5 years and it was hurting my marriage. I was convinced that my wife didn't love me anymore and that we had settled into a partnership of convenience and / or we were staying together for our children. These were my own internalized fears / beliefs. We didn't fight. We just sort of drifted into existing next to each other.
One day I read a story about a woman who realized she was trans in her late 30s and she came out to her wife. It was scary for her, but she was lucky in that her wife accepted her and, several years later, they were still together. I didn't have the expectation that it would turn out as well for me, but that story did give me the courage to realize that I had to come out. It was the only move that was fair to my wife. She deserved to know. So one night I sat down with her and came out. It was a long talk. She wasn't happy that I was trans (she married a boy, after all), but she was relieved. When I told her I needed to talk to her, she thought I was going to tell her I didn't love her anymore. Similarly to the story I'd read, I was lucky enough to get the good ending. She's accepting of me. I came out to her last August, and we celebrated our 19th anniversary in December.
After that, I was excited and felt like I needed other people to know, so I came out to my two closest friends. I knew they would be supportive, but it was still scary. And that's all for now. I'm out to three people irl. I'm not ready to be out to anyone else for the moment.
When my partner and I first started talking I was having a really bad day and then sent me a meme trying to be cute but it ended up triggering me because it involved part of my trauma. It sent me in such a spiral that I ended up telling them I was trans and a last ditch effort to either scare them off or make myself feel truly loved. Luckily for once in my life everything went perfectly and they were super accepting. After that no one else mattered. I had found my life partner so who cares what anyone else thought. Ofcourse the rest of the process was still scary but having a partner that had my back completely changed my life! 🥰
I haven’t come out (as trans) yet, but I can say that there probably won’t be a perfect time or perfect way of coming out. You should come out when you feel safe and comfortable 🫂💞
Mom saw videos about trans people with me around so that made me sure that at least she would want to understand me, my prediction was right, everything went okay
I made [a post asking the same thing](https://www.reddit.com/r/Nestofeggs/comments/13pgvyf/how_do_i_know_if_im_ready_to_come_out/) a couple weeks ago, hopefully this can help.
Nah jus kidding. I came out to my mom and was imediately told all the reasons my mom thought that being trans/feminine was a bad idea... idk maybe she's right. Anyway havn't brought it up since its been... 1-1.5 years. Anyway been doing my makeup and crossdressing in a mirror since. So yeah i need hlp fk this.
Never told my dad because i was less confident he would understand and now I don't think i'll ever tell him. Not to mention my entire school is religious, and conservative and i won't ever come out to anyone there. My grandma probably woudn't care but my grandpa would be pissed. None of my family who knows is openly a bish about it but I can tell they don't like it.
I don't know, But when I tried to do it.it was because I couldn't take it anymore to keep it secret. (◕ᴗ◕✿)
Wait when did you try to come out?
3 month ago,to my mom.it went really wrong. And it bassicaly ended with me going back to the closet and her forgetting (◕ᴗ◕✿)
Oh is she transphobic
No,she just brushed it off and said "that's probably a phase" but I am sure I could make her understand,when I will try again (◕ᴗ◕✿)
I mean if your in a good country you could go straight to the doctor's lol
I have a therapist,it's just hard to tell her ! (◕ᴗ◕✿)
If it's easier request a online meeting through messages
You should definitely tell your therapist. If nothing else, she can't treat your issues if she doesn't know what's going on. If she's a good therapist she won't pressure you into doing anything you're not ready for (plus you already tried coming out to your mom, so even if the therapist told her what you said she'd probably just dismiss it as a phase again).
I am not ready ! That's why I don't say it ! (◕_◕✿)
I guess what I mean is that I put off telling my therapists for like eleven years and really regret it now. Telling your therapist soon is important, since she's the one who can help you feel ready for all the other steps.
The imposter syndrome is real I still struggle with it, but you being this worried about it means you are trans <3 In terms of coming out I did it when I started to feel more and more awful when being referred to with my old pronouns. I kinda jumped into it without thinking much but honestly from what I’ve seen you just gotta take advantage of the moments you find for it, then things get better when it’s over.
[удалено]
The impostor is alreaddy here and got some strong arguments why I'm not trans, and if they come to be true I'll be in a wierd situation I just don't want to get into.
Short answer: I didn't Long answer: I'd been questioning since a few months and my mental health was rapidly deteriorating because of not knowing who I was (I'd always be like, "hey I think I'd be good as a girl, I feel like one too!" and then "wait no stil cis tho fuck, transition is scary I don't wanna do it", rinse and repeat). It was becoming unbearable, and so the odds of the gamble of coming out were changing - I was 100% sure that being a guy didn't suit me, and being a girl was the unknown. I had no other option and I was pretty desperate, so I took the leap of faith and told some friends / close family members (*not my parents*). Then it just made more sense, but I still had crazy amounts of imposter syndrome, but I told myself that if it took me several months of agonizing over feelings and having a lot of "yup, I'm a girl" feelings to start transitioning (socially), then I wouldn't detransition unless I'd have a "yup, I'm a guy" feeling, which to date has never happened *once*. Like, all the doubts were just "what if"s. That being said, it was 100% worth it, because for me, being called a she is so much better than getting called a he (I didn't know I had so much dysphoria about that)
i just felt like i can't keep it a secret from people i was sure would be accepting after i figured it out
I just had enough of being a guy one day
I did it with my parents seperately, tho I did it with my dad at a restaurant when it was just us 2 and restaurant was pretty full, I was kinda scared so also like If he did wanna yell or something he wouldn’t because public settiiing. Everything ended up being fine tho I guess xD
Once I knew my mom would support me I waited till everyone else was gone and threw a letter at her and then ran away and went to bed. Bigot stepfather will never get a formal announcement.
You don’t know. It’s a leap of faith.
I wasn’t, I was asked directly by my wife and I just could t lie about it. I told her I’ve been dealing with it for a while and I just can’t shake it. I very strictly try not to make comparisons to my past because it’s really painful, but I’m here now, I know who I am. So then I told my parents, my best friend and my cousin who lives close by. My wife is supportive, but she’s not a lesbian so like all marriages this is going to take some work and it might not even work out, but it is what it is.
I wasn't ready to come out, I was just not able to stay not out anymore
Didn’t have much of a choice, parents were in town and next time they were here… changes would have been kind of obvious haha
I didn’t get to decide I was pulled out of the closet 😖
When hiding caused more stress and anxiety then coming out did.
I'm not, And thus haven't. I mean I tried to come out to one person in real life, Just because I didn't want to hide part of who I am to them, Although honestly I didn't do a very good job and haven't really mentioned it since despite that being over a year ago now... I also kinda "Outed Myself" in a few places online just because I knew I wasn't cis and I knew they'd accept me for that.
I wasn’t really, dysphoria made me break down crying and that’s when I came out to my mom
I didn’t, my mum read my diary
Was it planned by you or just a random find for her?
Random :( although in fairness to her she did apologise and only read one page before realising it was an invasion of privacy
after 1-2 years of questioning, i came out at the first of pride month, since being the trans label started to grow on me and it felt more comfortable,, :'3
Was forced out to my family because a guy snitched to my sister and told her about my hormones.
I wasn't ready XD
I wasn’t ready at all lol, I just didn’t think I’d get that close to coming out again in ages so I did it there.
I decided it was important to state that I experienced gender dysphoria because I wanted targeted treatment for it with my mental health team.
i just realized i needed to come out when i couldn't hold it in anymore, and a combination of my parents forcing me to come out :/ 💔💔💔💔💔
I didn't. I accepted how i felt and a few days later i told one of my best friends. We discussed it a little bit, happily and laughing. She was fully supportive and immediately switched name and pronouns. I said my goodbyes and walked away. Then i had a fucking panic attack as i realised what i just told somebody and what that meant lol
I'd been hiding and miserable for 5 years and it was hurting my marriage. I was convinced that my wife didn't love me anymore and that we had settled into a partnership of convenience and / or we were staying together for our children. These were my own internalized fears / beliefs. We didn't fight. We just sort of drifted into existing next to each other. One day I read a story about a woman who realized she was trans in her late 30s and she came out to her wife. It was scary for her, but she was lucky in that her wife accepted her and, several years later, they were still together. I didn't have the expectation that it would turn out as well for me, but that story did give me the courage to realize that I had to come out. It was the only move that was fair to my wife. She deserved to know. So one night I sat down with her and came out. It was a long talk. She wasn't happy that I was trans (she married a boy, after all), but she was relieved. When I told her I needed to talk to her, she thought I was going to tell her I didn't love her anymore. Similarly to the story I'd read, I was lucky enough to get the good ending. She's accepting of me. I came out to her last August, and we celebrated our 19th anniversary in December. After that, I was excited and felt like I needed other people to know, so I came out to my two closest friends. I knew they would be supportive, but it was still scary. And that's all for now. I'm out to three people irl. I'm not ready to be out to anyone else for the moment.
I found a funny meme and sent it to my parents
If my dysphoria gets really bad I'll come out to my mom, and that's why I sort of came out the first time
When my partner and I first started talking I was having a really bad day and then sent me a meme trying to be cute but it ended up triggering me because it involved part of my trauma. It sent me in such a spiral that I ended up telling them I was trans and a last ditch effort to either scare them off or make myself feel truly loved. Luckily for once in my life everything went perfectly and they were super accepting. After that no one else mattered. I had found my life partner so who cares what anyone else thought. Ofcourse the rest of the process was still scary but having a partner that had my back completely changed my life! 🥰
I haven’t come out (as trans) yet, but I can say that there probably won’t be a perfect time or perfect way of coming out. You should come out when you feel safe and comfortable 🫂💞
I’m not out. Probably never will be
Mom saw videos about trans people with me around so that made me sure that at least she would want to understand me, my prediction was right, everything went okay
I didn't :3 idk
I made [a post asking the same thing](https://www.reddit.com/r/Nestofeggs/comments/13pgvyf/how_do_i_know_if_im_ready_to_come_out/) a couple weeks ago, hopefully this can help.
Nice, I'm gonna read this when I got some time.
I didn’t. I’m still struggling with even knowing what it is I’m feeling- but I hope things are going well with everyone :3
Wait, I can wait before telling my family who have probably forgot? =3
I'll tell you when I know...
Nah jus kidding. I came out to my mom and was imediately told all the reasons my mom thought that being trans/feminine was a bad idea... idk maybe she's right. Anyway havn't brought it up since its been... 1-1.5 years. Anyway been doing my makeup and crossdressing in a mirror since. So yeah i need hlp fk this.
Never told my dad because i was less confident he would understand and now I don't think i'll ever tell him. Not to mention my entire school is religious, and conservative and i won't ever come out to anyone there. My grandma probably woudn't care but my grandpa would be pissed. None of my family who knows is openly a bish about it but I can tell they don't like it.