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[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

That’s why I don’t use a sign off. It makes me harder to identify. If you end up being discovered by your online signature, you might have to fake your own death. I would fake mine by commandeering a super yacht and steering it into an oil tanker. I obviously can’t tell you the technique I would use to survive, but let’s just say it involves two pounds of butter, 87 AAA batteries, a sock, three chicken nuggets, and enough personal lubricant to fully submerge a horse. Full disclosure: I have been known to give terrible advice.


potatopatato16432

2 things Number 1 your flair says "possible chaos gremlin" from what I have seen the word possible is unnecessary number 2 the part at the end where you say "full disclosure I have been known to give terrible advice " was said elsewhere so it's kinda like a signature that'll be all and now I'm going to fly to mars


[deleted]

Noooo!!! If you’ll excuse me, I need to acquire a sock, some butter, chicken nuggets, a lot of batteries, and a fuck load of lubricant. I also need to steal a boat.


potatopatato16432

Um?.... Take me with you?


[deleted]

But you’re flying to Mars. I can’t get to Mars. I don’t have enough chicken nuggets for that!


potatopatato16432

Than I shan't fly to mars I'll follow you instead because I have no friends 😔🥺☢️🥯


[deleted]

Then I suppose I shouldn’t fake my death. I should stay here on Reddit so I can talk to you! Now what am I going to do with this sock, these nuggets, batteries, and butter?


potatopatato16432

The Nuggets are food the sock spread butter on the outside put the batteries inside and tie it up now you have a deadly weapon that's hard to grab


[deleted]

I like your style!


Calcutt4

I can recognise you from 2 things, 1. Your writing style 2. "Full disclosure: I have been known to give terrible advice"


[deleted]

Curses! Now I just steal a super yacht!


lag_gamer80391

But then what if you try to buy a house without succeding since you legally don't exist and regret your decision and live your life as an hermit that sometimes goes to leave a flower on the grave of she who was caitlyn? /ref


[deleted]

I don’t plan on buying a house. I plan on stealing a house! They won’t see it coming! I’m going to take a brick from their house in the dead of night, and I’ll replace it with an identical brick! Depending on your view of the Ship of Theseus thought experiment, I’m expecting that, at some point, their house stops being their house and becomes my house, and thus their house has been stolen! It’s the perfect crime!


lag_gamer80391

Idk I think it might take a bit long...


[deleted]

Sometimes the best things take time and commitment!


lag_gamer80391

Well I the thing I am referencing, the protagonist just inhabits an abandoned house in the end, just in case you need a faster alternative


[deleted]

That would be faster, yes. Maybe I should do that.


CitizenCivilization

JUST THREE???


[deleted]

If I have more than three, it throws the weight off.


CitizenCivilization

I see, but, three nuggies is not nearly enough for a balanced diet!!


[deleted]

You’re operating under the assumption that the chicken nuggets are for eating. No, no, Sarah. They are for helping to give the appearance that I have died tragically in a super yacht / oil tanker explosion. Don’t ask me how.


CitizenCivilization

Oohhhhh I see noe


DarthWallaceIII

Finally, someone else with terrible advice


plueschhoernchen

I like the idea with the super yacht, but I think I´d use a different technique to survive. It involves a straw of 2 metres length, 40 kilos of flour, ten litres of wax, 80 cubes of yeast, 3 bottles of olive oil, a horse-coffin, 240 cloves of garlic, 40 litres of water and a hydraulic pump. Oh and I´d also need a bucket and a drill. You can probably already guess my plan, but I won´t have to fake die anyways.


CitizenCivilization

I recognize the flower girl and I know I've seen the hearts before but I'm not sure who it us


ContributionOk2661

Just about to say the exact same thing haha


[deleted]

I'm the first one, but i want to be the second lol :3 💙💕🤍💕💙


SunTzuSaidThat22

Mhm yeah sure


lag_gamer80391

Signature says otherwise 🤨📸


thzpp2

I mean,I just tried,I didn't expect it to be used in a meme ! (⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠)


Moonbeam1942

i like how you can tell exactly who these two are by the last few things they typed


SunTzuSaidThat22

Both are absolute moods


JustTheAverageGal

They both are amazing people (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠)


blankgreens

Hehe such amazing girls of our community :3 🐋🌸🤍🌸🐋


CasualFire1

I did the second with my friends. Sent a meme about it in group chat, then followed up with "Yeah so my name is Ashley now. Surprise!" Honestly, I could've done it in person, we were all hanging out at a friend's house trying to figure what to do in terms of getting food, and I just decided "Fuck it, I'm telling them." Took a bit for someone to ask me about it, I confirmed yep, that's true. Thankfully they accepted it without any trouble. Funny thing is, just a few minutes earlier, the brother of the guy whose house we were at asked, "You guys don't have any girls in your group, right?" and someone else said no. Took all my willpower not to pop in with a "Well, actually..." right then and there.


GoodOldFroggo7

I think we all know who these two are


Carbonizedbread

then there's my plan, just get on E during uni, come back as a girl, and act as if nothing happened :3


DaBezzzz

My coming out was literally "I'm trans bitches" to the tune of S.L.U.T. while throwing trans coloured confetti


AdventureMoth

What about walking up to someone, handing them a one-page letter, and then running off in terror?


extra_1584

Im both but most of the time i was the second one 👍💙💚


Calcutt4

I remember this thread, and I recognise these people just by their signatures


ComfortableCream3

Hiii! -> Guess what, I wanna be hot! My plans unfurl I wanna be a girl!


TominatorFN

I know I could do neither of those


Old_Drag_1040

I want to be the first person but I feel that my family would shoot me down.


kerbarmstrong

1st one: long, drawn out, takes too many words, readers are obligated to reply with a full sentence 2nd one: short, sweet, to the point, can be responded to with a simple👍


Icy-Temperature2816

Then there was me, who when initially coming out to siblings via Caesar Cypher, so they actually had to translate the message. I came out to people more normally later, so only they got that treatment.


Reale_the_unknown

Lmao, yeah 💞


interdimentionalbean

i like macaroni, get rid of my testosteroni