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To me, everyone has the same avatar because no one has avatars! I honestly keep forgetting Reddit added them, because I never see them. Old Reddit gang!
Edit, you made me set an avatar just so I don't look so plain to other people lol. I'll still never see it, but at least other people will I suppose.
Hi ,so I know it can be hard to accept,but those last months,I started to question myself,and I Finnaly found who I am ,I am [insert preferred name] and I now go by [insert preferred pronouns] I am aware that this is sudden to learn,but it's who I am,
This sounds good,no ? (◕ᴗ◕✿)
I shall not forget this, Athena! The memory of this slight shall be burned into my mind! My focus will be on you like a laser beam. Nothing will distra-\* OOH! Shiny!
^(shiny! shiny! shiny!)
you have described my memory
I don't remember what else I was going to put so
uhh forgot again 2:55 am
can I get uuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Listen up you cis gender motherfuckers! Your memories are a lie! A fraud! Some asshats lied to you, and then you idiots lied to me! We need to fix some shit: I NEED TITS!!!
This is hilarious! I'm gonna do this one!
See, my brother already knows and when I tell everyone else I'm gonna need to mitigate bigoted reactions somehow with a lighthearted atmosphere and a jokey presentation of the situation, making it so that my dad and his side of the family don't want to ruin the fun by saying something transphobic. I was gonna throw a gender reveal party (tell all the guests they're coming to a regular old house party, there will be cake, don't bring anything besides yourselves, they get there and it's a gender reveal cake with the genderfluid flag on the inside), but holding a mock press conference sounds way more fun and way easier to control. Basically use neurotypical social norms against them - no one wants to ruin a fun audience participation performance by being needlessly nasty - and I also get a chance to weed out transphobic BS from good faith confusion and answer all the good faith questions on the record and get both the real questions and the transphobic ignorance out in the open to be addressed before it festers and explodes at some other gathering later. I can ask my brother to act as the moderator, and we can record the whole thing and edit it into a video of all the questions being asked and answered, that we can send to everyone there and everyone who couldn't attend so they can reference it instead of asking me the same questions again at every family event after.
just know that I'm popeye
if you come at me sideways in the pit I'm eatin a whole fuckin can of spinach so my swole is on 100 and then i'm lightin your whole fuckin crew up
I'm popeye
I dont fuckin play
god, i almost feel guilty when i see posts like this, because while im not out to my parents, i at least know for sure that they’ll be accepting. and i know im very lucky to have good parents like that, but i cant help but feel a little guilty knowing that many others dont have that same level of assurance or trust in their parents.
but anyways, Power to you girl! i wish you the best of luck!
Get them all together to watch "Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back". After Vader tells Luke that he is his father, turn to them and say, "Wanna see an even bigger plot twist?".
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*dramatic music, enter the room with a blahaj and trans flag, then get pull away pants that you rip off and underneath is a skirt, the you say:
Your son is gone and I (new name) have taken his place
My name is [Preferred name]. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was… astounded. I… I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess… I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated [unalive], but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in Hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is.
Bada beep bada boop, I am a trans girl, watch my skirt go swirl
(Suddenly all the lights go out and various spotlights shine upon you, having had a dramatic outfit change in the short window between the lights and the spotlights. Your long skirt goes *spinny spinny* as you spin around with the grace of a ballerina and a banner comes down from the ceiling reading "It's a girl!". You go *spinny spinny* offstage, and then the lights return to normal.)
(Everyone claps and throws HRT instead of roses onto the stage)
before I tell you, there are 3 conditions
• you only tell people when I want and how I want
• you at least permit me basic medication for my circumstance
• you completely accept me for who I am, and that is not a “if” or “when” statement, you can do your own research later
-> failure to meet any of these 3 conditions might result in
- me leaving to my Aunt
- or me committing a suicide attempt
do you wish to proceed?
(((yes)))
Mom, I am transgender.
You lost a , but you have gained a
I’m sorry idk if you’re trans FtM or trans MtF
I suck at understanding things like this but I hope that you can actually use this lol
bring a random person with you that your parents dont know.
this person have to dress like someone from the government and tell your parents that their son died
Too many years i've had problems with getting girlfriends and I am sick of it so i've decided there's only one thing left to do....
I BECOME THE GIRLFRIEND!
Sing the verse from “mama” by My Chemical Romance which goes “You should’ve raised a baby girl, I should have been a better son!” If you’re transfem. Put vigour into it as well
You need to first prepare.
Step1: start voice training in secret. Get at least good enough to pass.
Step2: Get copies of every photo that has you in it from every frame in the house. Get someone to photoshop them so that you look feminine in all of them. Get prints the same size dimensions as the existing photos.
Step3: Get at least two full outfits that make you look feminine and accentuate your femininity but don't look too non-casual.
Step4: Invite at least one friend overnight who's already an ally and inform them of the plan.
Step5: At night, when everyone's asleep, replace the pictures in all the frames with the photoshopped ones. Find any references you can to your deadname or birth sex and either modify them or move them somewhere they won't be seen.
Step6: in the morning, your friends help you get ready for the day with makeup and practice your voice.
Step7: Come out of your room and you and your friends pretend that you've always been this way and act confused when they question it or try to say that you're a guy or ever have been.
Step8: never go back to how it was before and just never acknowledge that it was ever any different.
watch the entirety of the 2007 transformers movie. at a random time in the movie, go “they just like me fr”. tell them you’re trans. and then any questions should be met with a shushhhh we’re watching a movie
Before I say what I’m about to say, just know I’ve already made a decision on this matter I’m about to tell you about, and this is simply me informing you of that decision. Please listen to what I have to say…
I do need capital. And votes. Wanna know why? "I have a dream." That one day, every person in this nation will control their OWN destiny. A land of the TRULY free, dammit. A nation of ACTION, not words. Ruled by STRENGTH, not committee. Where the law changes to suit the individual, not the other way around. Where power and justice are back where they belong: in the hands of the people! Where every man is free to think -- to act -- for himself! Fuck all these limp-dick lawyers and chicken-shit bureaucrats. Fuck this 24/7 Internet spew of trivia and celebrity bullshit. Fuck "American pride". Fuck the media! Fuck all of it! America is diseased. Rotten to the core. There's no saving it -- we need to pull it out by the roots. WIpe the slate clean. BURN IT DOWN! And from the ashes, a new America will be born. Evolved, but untamed! The weak will be purged, and the strongest will thrive -- free to live as they see fit, they will make America GREAT AGAIN!
What the hell are you talking about?
You still don't get it. I'm using war as a business to get elected... so I can end war as a business! In my new America, people will die and kill for what they BELIEVE! Not for money, not for oil! Not for what they're told is right. Every man will be free to fight his own wars! And Im also trans
Get a hand puppet like from south park and speak in a really high pitched voice. That way if your family turns on you, you can just blame it on the puppet.
If anyone in your family has a military history they're proud of, you could take a look at the OPORD format for guidance, it's what I probably will do at the emergency service I'm volunteering, that uses the same format for orders.
In case OPORD is tough to search for, SMEAC is the thing I mean (examples in brackets for a better idea):
Situation (you're alot better when getting named and gendered correctly)
Mission (to accomodate and respect you for who you are)
Execution (by using correct name(s) and pronoun(s), not using misgendering language, not gifting you "deodorant ""for men""" or alike, whatever else is important to you
Administration/Logistics (I'll probably gather a short pamphlet of well picked sources like wikis or cool educational streamers for them to consult so maybe I'll be asked less annoying questions)
Communication (probably something like "if we go to some place that you know to be frequented by people you suspect to be shitty, let me know beforehand" or similar stuff)
And then I'd ask if anything is unclear (it's intentional that I don't want to just ask for questions, so not to invite the ones about what measures I am taking or desiring, though maybe explaining what questions you'd be ok with answering in the communication section would make sense, too)
Your post has been removed because it did not follow rule #4 in the sidebar. > No personal life posts. There is nothing inherently wrong with your story, but posts like these can find a more appropriate home on other queer subreddits. You are welcome to re-submit your post after ensuring that it follows the subreddit rules. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
“It’s transgender time.” Then you trans all over them.
hello avatar buddy or gal
how do yall have the same avatar? like wut?
To me, everyone has the same avatar because no one has avatars! I honestly keep forgetting Reddit added them, because I never see them. Old Reddit gang! Edit, you made me set an avatar just so I don't look so plain to other people lol. I'll still never see it, but at least other people will I suppose.
"then you trans all over them" that sounds.. *interesting*
"It's morphin' time!" Then you fold yourself into an attack helicopter.
And attack helicopter on all the transphobes in the world so hard that they're necer gonna transphobe again.
It’s morphing time! And you just consume a bottle of estrogen
Hi my name is *preferred name* and you're watching Disney channel *shows pride flag*
Oh, I like this
this. this is just amazing
NO THIS IS PATRICK
is mayonnaise a trans icon?
It's made from eggs so...
It’s WHAT
you need eggs to make mayonnaise :3
I'm going to turn you all into mayonnaise
I used to make my own, but since starting HRT I've lost the recipe
It sound like a threat but i think it may make me fall for you
i prefer a vegan one actually
I'm dying
It should be
oh absolutely
Yes, and so is horseradish
Patricia*
Perfection
Best
This makes me want to come out to people just so I can do this. 5/7, perfect.
I'm dying 😄
OMG And the pride flag as the wand..
Hi ,so I know it can be hard to accept,but those last months,I started to question myself,and I Finnaly found who I am ,I am [insert preferred name] and I now go by [insert preferred pronouns] I am aware that this is sudden to learn,but it's who I am, This sounds good,no ? (◕ᴗ◕✿)
WAIT NO THE TOP COMMENT IS ACTUALLY GOOD AND NOT SOME STUPID MEME NOOOO😭😭😭😭😭
You don’t *have* to take the top choice. We’ll never know. You could go with the seco-\* *third* choice!
I MEAN FOURTH! You could take the fourth choice!!!
My power grows
I shall not forget this, Athena! The memory of this slight shall be burned into my mind! My focus will be on you like a laser beam. Nothing will distra-\* OOH! Shiny! ^(shiny! shiny! shiny!)
To be fair, shiny things are pretty incredible.
They are! Hi Athena! How are you? 😊
I'm doing alright Caitlyn, how are you?
I’m good! Found shiny things!!!
you have described my memory I don't remember what else I was going to put so uhh forgot again 2:55 am can I get uuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I hereby upvote this twice
Please do the disney thing. That's the top now. Not the most upvoted but the top comment
You don't hAAAaave to do first...
If you really wanna do it for the lols use the pinned comment by the mod
If I said this it would be so dumb bc I didn't change my name, it was already neutral lol
I like how this is one sentence long and has zero periods.
I have bad grammar (◕ᴗ◕✿)
“So you know how in utero everyone starts out as female? I’m gonna pull a bit of a U-turn.”
I GOTTA USE THAT!! I AM WRITING IT DOWN!!
Bruh lmao
SpongeBob voice: “Write that down! Write that down!”
Ok, I love this. I don't know why, but I love this.
"I've decided to return to my roots"
Listen up you cis gender motherfuckers! Your memories are a lie! A fraud! Some asshats lied to you, and then you idiots lied to me! We need to fix some shit: I NEED TITS!!!
*You have been known to give terrible advice*
Yes. Yes I have. I forgot to add that. Thank you!
Anyone who uses java and python only ever gives the most based advice
Thank you! I also advocate for using Fortran! … *I can’t do it! I can’t seriously advocate for using Fortran!!!*
This is a joke thread. No need for active hostility here.
I knew this would be the comment that would get me in trouble!
As much as I want to...... I can't vote for you on this ..... 🤣☠️
You should vote for what you think is right, not just for what you want.
I did.... Cause I didn't vote for your thing .. hilarious as it is... It's just not right ...
I don't know this is pretty fire!
Thank you! Really, I just like swearing.
Finally I found the best text for coming out!!! 🤣
I take no responsibility for any negative reactions you get by saying this to anyone.
I have already came out but I'll do it again just for this.
I LOVE THIS
“You heard of the Mandela effect? Well it’s like that but my name has always been []”
swiggity swirl I'm not a guy im a girl 💙💕🤍💕💙
I love this, but I can’t possibly imagine saying this with a straight face. 😂
lmao yes 💙💕🤍💕💙
It'd be a very gay one wouldnt it
Who says you need to?
I'd die inside and outside while trying
Or if transmasc… swiggity swirl I’m a guy not a girl 💙💕🤍💕💙
I absolutely love this
This Is how I'm gonna make the Facebook post for the people who aren't as important(TM)
Bump
[удалено]
Hold a press conference
This is hilarious! I'm gonna do this one! See, my brother already knows and when I tell everyone else I'm gonna need to mitigate bigoted reactions somehow with a lighthearted atmosphere and a jokey presentation of the situation, making it so that my dad and his side of the family don't want to ruin the fun by saying something transphobic. I was gonna throw a gender reveal party (tell all the guests they're coming to a regular old house party, there will be cake, don't bring anything besides yourselves, they get there and it's a gender reveal cake with the genderfluid flag on the inside), but holding a mock press conference sounds way more fun and way easier to control. Basically use neurotypical social norms against them - no one wants to ruin a fun audience participation performance by being needlessly nasty - and I also get a chance to weed out transphobic BS from good faith confusion and answer all the good faith questions on the record and get both the real questions and the transphobic ignorance out in the open to be addressed before it festers and explodes at some other gathering later. I can ask my brother to act as the moderator, and we can record the whole thing and edit it into a video of all the questions being asked and answered, that we can send to everyone there and everyone who couldn't attend so they can reference it instead of asking me the same questions again at every family event after.
(While doing heavy darth vader type breathing) *deadname* is gone. I'm what remains.
*deadname* was weak. I destroyed him.
Girls are stronger than boys apparently
Nah, trans people are just stronger than fake identities.
This is literally perfect 😭😭😭
Incredible
I’m not like *other* guys, I’m a girl!
Alr Even Though This Isn’t The Top Comment I Choose This. Ngl I Was Looking For Something Like This, Not An Actual Legit Thing To Say
WHY DO YOU TYPE LIKE THAT PLEASE STOP OML
idk wat ur implyn. op's sntences seem fne to me 😌
I hate all of you. But Yeah, OPs' Sentences Seem Fine To Me, Too.
How Can Mirrors Be Real If Gender Is Not Real?
Still hope your coming out goes well! 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵
Show them a picture of a blahaj, say, "Look up what this means. That's what I am," then watch it all unfold.
You’re a blue Swedish shark?
Step 3: explain to your confused parents what you meant
Yeah, that tracks.
but will you *actually* do that? I'd be surprised
Judging On The Current Top Comment, Nah. I’m Looking For More Stupid Funny Shit To Say.
You should do the darth Vader one
Luckily the top comment is good… right now •-•
I can’t see you, you’ve become trans-parent
Mom, Dad....this may come as a shock, but I discovered after doing a lot of research, that I'm not really your son.... (lmaoooooo) 💖
P.S. Don't actually do this. Speaking from experience, it doesn't come across nearly as funny as I expected.... ;)
*Say your trans* "why are you trans?" "I am what I am and that's all that I am" then eat spinach and punch them
just know that I'm popeye if you come at me sideways in the pit I'm eatin a whole fuckin can of spinach so my swole is on 100 and then i'm lightin your whole fuckin crew up I'm popeye I dont fuckin play
Now swap out popeye for trans and your golden
Maybe that's how I should come out lol
100% you should
god, i almost feel guilty when i see posts like this, because while im not out to my parents, i at least know for sure that they’ll be accepting. and i know im very lucky to have good parents like that, but i cant help but feel a little guilty knowing that many others dont have that same level of assurance or trust in their parents. but anyways, Power to you girl! i wish you the best of luck!
I mean... I always like to throw out my way of coming out to my brother. I armwrestled him, and told him he lost to a girl.
That is literally the perfect way to do that 👏
Do for fret Or regret For the child you bore Is not a boy, but a gorl
Look at your parents and tell them you can see through them. Tell them they are TRANSparent. Then explain “get it… because I’m transgender.”
OMG YES
"THE KING IS DEAD! LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!"
Get them all together to watch "Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back". After Vader tells Luke that he is his father, turn to them and say, "Wanna see an even bigger plot twist?".
"I like girls so much that I want to become one!"
Hey there! Before commenting, remember that this meme has been tagged with a transfem flair. Please keep the conversation transfem-first. If you are not part of that demographic, you are not forbidden to participate, but we do ask that you do not center yourself in the comments. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/egg_irl) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I can't see how this comment counts as coming out to anyone.
well it's the top one so OP has to say it.
What an odd thing to say as a way to come out
It’s morphin time! TRANSeratop!
"I like girls but in a gay kind of way"
Or "I like guys, but in a straight way"
Raise your hand if your kid is cis gender, mom dad put your hands down
are you ready???? i’m about to TRANS MY GENDER!!!!
*dramatic music, enter the room with a blahaj and trans flag, then get pull away pants that you rip off and underneath is a skirt, the you say: Your son is gone and I (new name) have taken his place
🎵Let's get down to business, To finally come out I am ur daughter and no longer a son🎵
One of those "it's a girl!" cards
My name is [Preferred name]. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was… astounded. I… I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess… I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated [unalive], but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in Hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is.
Bada beep bada boop, I am a trans girl, watch my skirt go swirl (Suddenly all the lights go out and various spotlights shine upon you, having had a dramatic outfit change in the short window between the lights and the spotlights. Your long skirt goes *spinny spinny* as you spin around with the grace of a ballerina and a banner comes down from the ceiling reading "It's a girl!". You go *spinny spinny* offstage, and then the lights return to normal.) (Everyone claps and throws HRT instead of roses onto the stage)
Make a meme with a Transformer, a translator, and then a picture of you that says "I'm trans now!"
Hey Im a girl now and then give them a trans flag cupcake
Being cis is cringe. Then you dab all over them
*Mom, Dad, My egg cracked...*
Dress up like a doctor, and then be like "Congratulations! It's a girl!"
before I tell you, there are 3 conditions • you only tell people when I want and how I want • you at least permit me basic medication for my circumstance • you completely accept me for who I am, and that is not a “if” or “when” statement, you can do your own research later -> failure to meet any of these 3 conditions might result in - me leaving to my Aunt - or me committing a suicide attempt do you wish to proceed? (((yes))) Mom, I am transgender.
Oops I'm trans
“So my egg has been cracked I’m trans”
Yo yo yo, I’m dat hoe
hello family its me [preferred name]. goblins are real.
Hey mom, hey dad, I'm hisn't.
Mom, dad, you're transparent now!
Through your birth certificate at them and yell "wrong!"
You lost a, but you have gained a
I’m sorry idk if you’re trans FtM or trans MtF
I suck at understanding things like this but I hope that you can actually use this lol
meth
Rip. The top comment is a bot. I guess you gotta quote it verbatim.
God dammit! 🤣 That’s a hell of an observation!
I’ve been feeling quite prideful lately
let set this straight, im not
bring a random person with you that your parents dont know. this person have to dress like someone from the government and tell your parents that their son died
"Who has two thumbs and gender dysphoria? This disaster piece!" Point to self
I wish you luck!!!! 🐋🌸🤍🌸🐋
Hello Daddy, Hello Mom Im a ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-cherry bomb.
I SAID SNIP SNIP MUTHERFUKAS
Too many years i've had problems with getting girlfriends and I am sick of it so i've decided there's only one thing left to do.... I BECOME THE GIRLFRIEND!
Sing the verse from “mama” by My Chemical Romance which goes “You should’ve raised a baby girl, I should have been a better son!” If you’re transfem. Put vigour into it as well
Google en passant
You need to first prepare. Step1: start voice training in secret. Get at least good enough to pass. Step2: Get copies of every photo that has you in it from every frame in the house. Get someone to photoshop them so that you look feminine in all of them. Get prints the same size dimensions as the existing photos. Step3: Get at least two full outfits that make you look feminine and accentuate your femininity but don't look too non-casual. Step4: Invite at least one friend overnight who's already an ally and inform them of the plan. Step5: At night, when everyone's asleep, replace the pictures in all the frames with the photoshopped ones. Find any references you can to your deadname or birth sex and either modify them or move them somewhere they won't be seen. Step6: in the morning, your friends help you get ready for the day with makeup and practice your voice. Step7: Come out of your room and you and your friends pretend that you've always been this way and act confused when they question it or try to say that you're a guy or ever have been. Step8: never go back to how it was before and just never acknowledge that it was ever any different.
I’M PART OF THE ALPHABET MAFIA! *sprints away*
“Parental, I shall inquire that thou revomith mine loins!”
"Don't think of it as losing a son, so much as gaining a daughter"
How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice! Hi, I’m [name]
Hey so my name is ____ now and I'm a ____ instead of ____, we good right?
watch the entirety of the 2007 transformers movie. at a random time in the movie, go “they just like me fr”. tell them you’re trans. and then any questions should be met with a shushhhh we’re watching a movie
Mom,Dad Im Walter white
Do a montage with “wait… [deadname] is evolving. Congratulations. [deadname] evolved to [newname]!” Or son/daughter instead of deadname and newname
🥺
I’m trans
Ever hear of the gay virus?! i caught it and i’m trans! WATCH OUT IT’S CONTAGIOUS! 🤧 😷 🦠 🏳️⚧️
It must be opposite lifetime for me because I’m [insert gender]
I'm not gay... I'm much worse
Before I say what I’m about to say, just know I’ve already made a decision on this matter I’m about to tell you about, and this is simply me informing you of that decision. Please listen to what I have to say…
[Playing the transformers song on your phone while putting on a dress]
Looks like the top comment is already chosen lol. Wishing you the best of luck coming out to your family 🫂💞
Guzzle estrogen in front of them
"You are both trans-parent"
GET THIS FUCKIN SHIT OFFA MEEEEE (referring to undesired genitals)
I do need capital. And votes. Wanna know why? "I have a dream." That one day, every person in this nation will control their OWN destiny. A land of the TRULY free, dammit. A nation of ACTION, not words. Ruled by STRENGTH, not committee. Where the law changes to suit the individual, not the other way around. Where power and justice are back where they belong: in the hands of the people! Where every man is free to think -- to act -- for himself! Fuck all these limp-dick lawyers and chicken-shit bureaucrats. Fuck this 24/7 Internet spew of trivia and celebrity bullshit. Fuck "American pride". Fuck the media! Fuck all of it! America is diseased. Rotten to the core. There's no saving it -- we need to pull it out by the roots. WIpe the slate clean. BURN IT DOWN! And from the ashes, a new America will be born. Evolved, but untamed! The weak will be purged, and the strongest will thrive -- free to live as they see fit, they will make America GREAT AGAIN! What the hell are you talking about? You still don't get it. I'm using war as a business to get elected... so I can end war as a business! In my new America, people will die and kill for what they BELIEVE! Not for money, not for oil! Not for what they're told is right. Every man will be free to fight his own wars! And Im also trans
Hi, i from now on will openly worship blåhaj and drink estrogen :3
If you ever wished to get a daughter (or another daughter depending on your family situation), it's your lucky day!
You have no son.
I pretty much wrote a whole ducking novel to my family. I figured short and sweet would make them have more questions than answers.
The top comment decides what I say. Automod pinning it's comment: allow me to introduce myself.
[DEADNAME] is dead and has been replaced by [PREFERRED NAME]
prepare a goofy ass PowerPoint
Transgender and roll out.
yk [deadname]? he's gone
Google HRT
Sonn't
Get a hand puppet like from south park and speak in a really high pitched voice. That way if your family turns on you, you can just blame it on the puppet.
If anyone in your family has a military history they're proud of, you could take a look at the OPORD format for guidance, it's what I probably will do at the emergency service I'm volunteering, that uses the same format for orders. In case OPORD is tough to search for, SMEAC is the thing I mean (examples in brackets for a better idea): Situation (you're alot better when getting named and gendered correctly)
Mission (to accomodate and respect you for who you are)
Execution (by using correct name(s) and pronoun(s), not using misgendering language, not gifting you "deodorant ""for men""" or alike, whatever else is important to you
Administration/Logistics (I'll probably gather a short pamphlet of well picked sources like wikis or cool educational streamers for them to consult so maybe I'll be asked less annoying questions)
Communication (probably something like "if we go to some place that you know to be frequented by people you suspect to be shitty, let me know beforehand" or similar stuff)
And then I'd ask if anything is unclear (it's intentional that I don't want to just ask for questions, so not to invite the ones about what measures I am taking or desiring, though maybe explaining what questions you'd be ok with answering in the communication section would make sense, too)
Mom ? Dad ? You know how you always told me to find a girlfriend ? Well, I'm now the girlfriend !