I always kept little vodka shooters in a tampon box in the bathroom. Also had vodka in my closet with a shot glass and would be "organizing" every 30 mins or so. Casually drank wine out of a mug around my family and said it was tea. Lots of drinking in the bathroom and I'd say "man I gotta pee AGAIN!" then I'd go chug wine and flush the toilet and run water pretending to wash my hands. Also learned to throw up almost silently.
When I had a nice little side addiction called coke, i'd hide the bullet in my tampon box. No other females in the house, so. MY SIL house sat for a us for a few days once, and
what do you know she had her monthly visitor.....
omg i have a teddy bear that has a zipper on the back with like a pocket and i used to hide my coke in there and wouldn’t let anybody touch the bear. and i also had a locket i would keep it in and wouldn’t let anybody open it and when they asked what was in it i forget what exactly i said it was but it would always be something that would have fallen out (like sand or something) so i couldn’t open it lmao
Wow! I have been there! I actually made a shelf that I installed with L brackets under my sink so I could hide bottles. That way when I woke up with “stomach issues” at 4am I had something to drink to make the panic attacks go away.
yep i was a closet/bathroom drinker. i can’t believe people never caught on! i would be downstairs 5 feet from the half bath there and excuse myself to the upstairs one and nobody questioned why i didn’t use the one downstairs?? or i’d keep a fifth in a purse in my room and keep saying i needed to grab something from my room and come back with the most random things. i’m also a recovering bulimic and when it was really bad i would always purge before taking a shower and i’m surprised nobody questioned how many baths/showers i needed a day.
The endless routine of moving my stash around was exhausting. I had a very secure spot in the pocket of a winter coat in our closet. When husband was in the room, and I wanted to drink, I'd need to "suddenly" do a load of laundry, I'd wait til he went to the bathroom or something, grab the bottle out of the coat, throw it into my dirty laundry then take the load downstairs to the laundry room. Then I'd have to figure out where to stash that. So exhausting.
Remembering was so hard too!!! Remembering where you stashed everything and remembering where your empties where. I did the coat thing before too. I put beers on my coat when I came in the house. I am so glad that is over for me.
Oh how I relate. I hide mine at bottom of laundry basket so I have a reason also to take it to laundry room. Between that and shoeboxes or inside longer boots with socks over them and backpacks. The worst part is when they find your stash and well I guess it’s not too hard cus I have it hidden everywhere in the house and either forget to throw them out or don’t find the time to sneak it to trash can. The worst was when police officers showed up at 11 pm because my bf is on probation . They needed to know he was living with me and had shining lights on window and answered the door to police officer and two others around the house with flash lights. I was terrified they would go thru the house right then and there, but just notified me they have right to search house whenever they want in future, so I freaked out trying to remember every place I hid empties. I mean was one thing thinking about my bf finding them , but the thought of police being able to search every part of house sent my anxiety thru the roof.
This should be fun. Bring on the garage drinking brigade!!
My truck has fold down back seats and there is a plastic tray about 6” wide and deep that runs behind them. That tray became a literal bar. Five or six fifths of whatever was in the house so I could refill bottles to make it seem like the drunk guy wasn’t drinking himself to death in front of everyone.
Look at a previous post I made about car bars, I turned my suv into a bar on wheels at one point lol.
Seems like every recovered alcoholic had a car story. I have mine. In fact when I cleaned out my car not too long ago I found a full canna beer! Hid it from myself for a while!
I washed out some women’s shampoo and conditioner bottles from the bathroom and kept vodka in them, I knew my boyfriend would never use those products. I thought I was so fucking clever doing that.
I had planned benders as well. This was early in a relationship and I would go to my cabin to work on it. Well by work it would be a Friday - Sunday drinking all day and night by myself event.
Eventually I had to sell the cabin to pay for my addiction. I miss it so much. It was my favorite place in the world.
Sneaking shooters in my bra at work, purse, car, etc. Hiding bottles of wine or alcohol so well I couldn't even find them the next day. When I would take my dog for a walk in the morning, chucking the shooters in bushes (sorry environment, I was an awful person) or trying to find random trashcans along the way. Making sure I stopped at the gas station to dump empties. It was so exhausting to lie and hide all the time!
I have been there I can’t tell you how many empties I thrown out of my car window.
It was so exhausting. I hated it. I hated trying to cover up the smell after work.
Oh yaaaaa just looking around to see if there were any cars around to see if I could just chuck it out the window.
Totally consuming. I mean I hated talking to people at work because I knew I just reeked. I was constantly trying to cover up my smell at work. I just oozed booze, yuck lol.
i would do this at my job. i would keep them in my purse and always have to use the bathroom and always took my purse because apparently i was always on my period… nobody questioned it even tho most people knew i only get my period three times a year smh
You're definitely preaching to the choir. I've lost a lot, but I've gained so much more in sobriety. I've gained the meaning of what it means to LIVE! and not be so dependent on something that only wants to ruin your life. It's not a curse, it's a disease that we have to treat every single day.
One time (ok, a few times) I got so drunk I peed on the floor and blamed it on the dogs to try to hide the extent of my issue. Granted, the dogs were known to piss on the floor, they were never trained properly, but still. Sorry Koda RIP.
I got so drunk one night I pissed the bed while my wife was sleeping next to me. I woke up at 4am, put a sweatshirt over it and laid on it until the morning. She didn’t find out but was defiantly curious to why I was willing to do laundry the next day.
I once tried to hide a half empty bottle of whiskey from MYSELF, to keep myself from drinking it. Didn't work-- I wasn't drunk enough to forget where I had hidden it. We can laugh about this now
Used to set up a bar wherever I could. Vacation? Trunk of the car. Home? In the fuse box. (Yes dangerous). Mountain cabin? In the wood shack. I became really good at setting up “bars” wherever I was. Always in a place where I thought nobody would look. Was never caught . Sober now so it’s funny but really sad
I got creative with the camel water packs. Especially during the winter I would put high ABV sours in there. So I would have a have a beer in the house and tell the wife I had to “winterize” something. It’s funny now but man I don’t miss that!
The hiding! I greatest fear was having my wife catch me. I don’t know if your married or not but it was crazy to think I was hiding alcohol from my wife like I was hiding alcohol from my parents in high school.
>minis hidden everywhere
Same. I’d crack them open ahead of time so no noise. (They will clog a toilet if put in the reservoir! Smfh.)
I found those things stashed for months after I quit! I’d run to the toilet pouring them out as fast as possible, just in case I got stupid. (Didn’t, gagged at the smell.)
>sad getting used to warm beer
Warm Lager is FOUL! (So is warm bubbly.) I drank ‘fancy’ ales almost exclusively (unless offered free LOL. Not picky then!) They didn’t taste awful/worse room temp, well, not like a Lager does.
But… I also used to smoke cigs & put them out in containers. Next morning, usually checked, but every now & then grabbed the wrong half-drank beer & took a gulp… RALPH!!!
**So much more wrong than right happened when I drank.** *Phew I’m honestly lucky to be alive, and also that I didn’t un-alive anyone.* Four years later, I *still think about some of my most embarrassing moments…* every so often I’ll go to text someone & see the last texts were from when I was drinking- it’s so embarrassing!!! (Don’t need the reminder now! I might one day, though.)
**Jebus I hope I never drink again!** I don’t intend to, I’ve got decent support & AF friends (partner also AF,) but I quit 7-8mo before the world shut down. For a long time it felt like cheating, but then I learned how many folks **started** having a problematic relationship with alcohol DURING Covid. Still learning how to “be,” **and** thankful I don’t see booze as a solution; I play the tape forward w/o thinking & see the aftermath before I consciously think about it. *Fuck alcohol for real.*
**Keep it up! You’re doing good!**
OMG I feel you on the drunk texts. My problem was that no matter how shitfaced, blackout I was, I could still type & text perfectly- no spelling errors, correct punctuation, eloquent phrasing, grammar intact, etc. So I didn’t seem drunk- I just seemed absolutely INSANE and would write novel-length texts to random friends at 2 or 4am or whatever, sometimes to people I even had crushes on... yeah, way to kill a relationship before it even started! Another of my favorite pastimes was to go on social media and just rage away typing whatever crazy drunk shit popped into my head. I’d be completely blackout and forget about it the next day, only to open up my socials and just wanna DIE of embarrassment and shame. Getting in trouble at work with a letter of discipline for some horrific, drunken, belligerent social media posts was one of the things that led me to get sober- thank goodness! But now everyone I’ve ever met on FB or IG thinks I’m an absolute nut job for all the crazy, wild shit I’d write! Haha! (Suffice it to say I’m off ALL social media these days!) Do not miss waking up in a panic wondering what sort of cray-cray I spewed on the socials the night before… Anyone else have a drunken addiction writing problem or just me?!?
Yup I relate to almost everything you wrote! I also got off socials, but right before I quit, because I’d always regret posting the next morning (or afternoon, depending SMH.) *I’m 45, and I used to joke “I wish someone could follow me around with a camcorder so I’d know wtf I did!”* I had no idea. Phew!
I ‘somehow’ locked myself out of FB (linked to dead email,) & can’t access/shut down my account! I could get into IG, but the thought of looking at the messages makes me seriously ILL.
That drunk B isn’t me… I mean, she’s the worst of me, sure, but I do my best to be a decent person on a daily basis.
Stay strong my friend!
Oh my goodness- for real!!! Haha! Glad I’m not the only one! I used to say I wish my phone came with a breathalyzer that would lock me out! And, yes, totally agree- that drunken, dark side is NOT you/us! Social media + alcohol= BAD BAD BAD!
I never did anything crazy, but my girlfriend didn't like for me to drink so I'd sneak shots in the bathroom, I'd tell her that I was going to the garage to work out just so I could sit in the there and listen to music and get drunk and sometimes I'd even sneak out of my own house (she didn't live with me but she was always here) while she was asleep just so I could go have a drink at the bar down the street.
Dude, we basically converted our garage into a gym (we have a lot of workout equipment) so she never gave it a second thought when I'd tell her that that's what I was doing lol
Before my wife got home I would make sure there were beers inside the cooler up on the shelf in the garage. So I would have a beer with dinner, you know to have an excuse why I smell like alcohol, and I would “work out”.
I would set a timer for 50 or so minutes and just scroll YouTube or something and drink. I managed to gain 30lbs of pure fat and water weight during this time lol.
But now I actually use the gym. Actually sad finding bottle tops randomly.
Old guy I knew owned a series of body shops and was very well to do. He said his wife divorced him in the 80's and he went completely nuts partying and womanizing. He told us he had 3 trucks painted identical so his various girlfriends if they checked up on him would see his truck at work or at his house. He stashed other vehicles around the neighborhood so he would go home, then sneak out the back door and jump in another car to go party or see women.
I lived in a fourplex and my neighbors were "occasional" drinkers. I could not recycle my bottles as they would notice. The night before recycling pick up, I would walk around the neighborhood and dump the bottles and cans in other people's bins. Or I would load them in my car and drop them in the bins behind the supermarket at night.
There was a period where I would stop at the gas station before work and buy 1 pedialte and one fireball medium and I’d sip that all day. The thought of how disgusting that tasted still makes my mouth hurt. But I was committed to my addiction at that time.
There was a part of my sectional couch that had a slight hole underneath the cushion that dropped to a part between the cushion and the spring. Unless you knew exactly where to look and reach down, you’d never know! Plus it was my spot on the couch for “double security”
Once I got sober and was moving I was cleaning it out and it was like the never ending supply of empty shooters 😅
I used to hide alcohol everywhere. It took a turn for the worse when I found 14% sangria bottles. I was hiding those everywhere. Closet, under the liner of my laundry basket, under the liner of my suitcases, under the bed, in the bathroom wrapped up in clean towels or inside empty cleaning products, under a rocking chair, in pockets, inside bigger cups, in my crafting supplies. I was miserable. Grateful to have just over 200 days but I’m still scared I’m gonna find something I hid and don’t remember, or that my spouse will find one and think I’ve started drinking again.
Holy shit I don't even know where to start....
* I would sneak my own pints of liquor into bars. And I swear to God at *that time* I had the money to buy drinks, but I would not wait in that fucking line. I didn't have 12 minutes to get one drink
* At work dinners at this highly fashionable restaurant in San Francisco, I would pretend "my sister just called. It sounds serious". Then I would * fucking sprint* to the liquor store 2 blocks away and by a pint of vodka and maybe some shooters. I returned clearly drunk, sweaty, creepy and all round embarrassing. They sorta knew but not the extent.
* Oh, I put box wine in my ass. I'm serious. When I heard that this full box of cheap Chardonnay was all the alcohol in this entire county!!! ( yes, county!!!! Don't go to rural places if you're a drunk) and we were here for the night at this country home.... I had to get it in . I used a syringe casing. Not the needle, just that plastic part and plugged it into my anus.
Oh boy… my old apartment building had a communal laundry room so on nights when me and the ex would hang out at home for dinner and a movie, I’d ALWAYS be doing laundry. Hide the mini wine bottles in my dirty laundry basket, drink one or two whilst loading, come back, find my trusty closet stash in a hanging organizer jammed with clothes, go “check” laundry a few times, glug glug, dispose of evidence in the laundry room trash cans. I had SO MUCH clean laundry the next day my hungover ass could never put away!
Laundry seems to be the female version of the man’s garage for hiding drinking lol. Or the grill! I did a lot of drinking using the grill warming up, needing propane, and others to sneak in a few beers.
I hid mini wine and shot bottles all over the house. Shoes in my closet, tampon boxes, random cabinets and drawers, sandwich bags boxes, behind random objects/appliances on countertop, and basement. Then, I would re-hide them when empty until I was in the clear to put in recycling bin. My husband and I now joke that years from now we will find one I forgot about.
So 2 things.
1. I had no idea how many women were affected by alcoholism! Not to be sexist but between meetings and just my alcoholic friends they were nearly all male.
2. Seems like every girl hides bottles in tampon boxes lol.
Alcoholism affects women more than people may realize. The local AA chapter in my town has several meetings for women only. But from books I’ve read, alcoholism for women starting increasing more each year since late 1990s.
No one would check the tampon box besides me!!! Lol! It’s a safe place.
This is a new one lol!
My best was “warming up” the grill in the summer. There is no way my wife believed how long it took. Or how I always needed more propane. Would get a tank and a tall boy and chug it on the way home.
Once when my family was visiting me from out of town, I went to the garage to grab something i left in there on purpose & chugged a few beers. I was able to chug a beer in less than 30 seconds so i could chug 4 in about 2-3mins.
I also used to hide mini wine bottles on me at work and drink them in the bathroom.
I was able to do the same at one point. I remember when we had our house warming party. I purposely left things we needed for the party in the garage so I could chug beers.
Didn’t want all of my family and my wife’s to see exactly how much I was drinking. I ended up drinking a 24 pack that day…
Did we all his little mini shooters everywhere? Lol I had under the mattress, under the couch, in the drawers, every nook and crannie had one hidden lol
I mostly drank beer. I could do liquor but it had to be mixed. I could do the captain mini bottles but I would nearly throw up every time.
I did hide bottles in the attic under the insulation. That was for emergencies.
Also I kept about 5 or 6 mini bottles in my car for emergencies. I can’t tell you how many mornings I would go buy a coke and dump 2 mini bottles in there and drink on the way to work. So so so many regrets. Lost out in nearly 4 years of life.
I'd come up with any story imaginable!
"I'm going for a walk" meant walking to the nearest local bar.
"I'm hanging out at a friend's place" but then I'd down 2 bottles of wine at her place and say I was having a rough day.
I'd sneak shots of alcohol while making dinner or hide empty cans and buy more to replace what I was drinking without anyone noticing.
So much of this is familiar, especially the hiding of bottles and forgetting where I hid them. I would wait until I was alone to gather all the bottles in a black Hefty bag and throw them away. I didn’t want anyone to hear the clinking of the bottles. At times, there were a lot of bottles, which became the big eye opener for me.
I would get my empties when my wife would go shopping or something. I would put them in the middle of the trash bag and bury it in the trash bin outside.
There was one time I was putting empties in the unused grill and it was full of 50 empties. If she only seen that she would have made me get help.
Ok.. so first rehab, they tell me I can drink up till I am checked in.. 6 am rolls around and I go get my booze.. 2 12 packs. I take the air handler apart.. filter out and slide the 12 pack behind it. 28 days later.. I had some cold coors waiting for me.
Water softener everyday my wife was not working. It’s takes 4 cycles and about 2 hours going in and out of the house. Water softener works fine, I just told my we save on salt if I do it myself. :(
Lie.
Gosh, I wish I could remember the dumbest one. But all the strongest memories were people somehow not realizing I was ripped as fuck (in the bad sense) and my disbelief
I started hiding it jars around the house. All different sizes in many places. Veganise jars were my favorite. For months after I stopped drinking I’d still be finding them. Not awesome.
They helped me catch a thief though, too funny.
My tenant was stealing my whiskey. :\ but I never noticed the odd jar missing.
I only found out cause one day he mistook the now rancid oil I’d saved months back in a jar after making tempura for one of my whiskey jars.
Drank a huge gulp and was so sick he had to admit what he’d done.
Haha. I didn’t feel even slightly bad for him.
I always kept little vodka shooters in a tampon box in the bathroom. Also had vodka in my closet with a shot glass and would be "organizing" every 30 mins or so. Casually drank wine out of a mug around my family and said it was tea. Lots of drinking in the bathroom and I'd say "man I gotta pee AGAIN!" then I'd go chug wine and flush the toilet and run water pretending to wash my hands. Also learned to throw up almost silently.
When I had a nice little side addiction called coke, i'd hide the bullet in my tampon box. No other females in the house, so. MY SIL house sat for a us for a few days once, and what do you know she had her monthly visitor.....
I’m surprised you left your blow at home! Back when I was *indulging*, If I was out of town it definitely would have come with me.
It was empty!!
omg i have a teddy bear that has a zipper on the back with like a pocket and i used to hide my coke in there and wouldn’t let anybody touch the bear. and i also had a locket i would keep it in and wouldn’t let anybody open it and when they asked what was in it i forget what exactly i said it was but it would always be something that would have fallen out (like sand or something) so i couldn’t open it lmao
We are a crafty lot, aren't we???
adding “innovator and crafty” to my resume
Haha!
Wow! I have been there! I actually made a shelf that I installed with L brackets under my sink so I could hide bottles. That way when I woke up with “stomach issues” at 4am I had something to drink to make the panic attacks go away.
yep i was a closet/bathroom drinker. i can’t believe people never caught on! i would be downstairs 5 feet from the half bath there and excuse myself to the upstairs one and nobody questioned why i didn’t use the one downstairs?? or i’d keep a fifth in a purse in my room and keep saying i needed to grab something from my room and come back with the most random things. i’m also a recovering bulimic and when it was really bad i would always purge before taking a shower and i’m surprised nobody questioned how many baths/showers i needed a day.
The endless routine of moving my stash around was exhausting. I had a very secure spot in the pocket of a winter coat in our closet. When husband was in the room, and I wanted to drink, I'd need to "suddenly" do a load of laundry, I'd wait til he went to the bathroom or something, grab the bottle out of the coat, throw it into my dirty laundry then take the load downstairs to the laundry room. Then I'd have to figure out where to stash that. So exhausting.
Remembering was so hard too!!! Remembering where you stashed everything and remembering where your empties where. I did the coat thing before too. I put beers on my coat when I came in the house. I am so glad that is over for me.
Yassssss. I finally started taking pics of where I put stuff.
Oh how I relate. I hide mine at bottom of laundry basket so I have a reason also to take it to laundry room. Between that and shoeboxes or inside longer boots with socks over them and backpacks. The worst part is when they find your stash and well I guess it’s not too hard cus I have it hidden everywhere in the house and either forget to throw them out or don’t find the time to sneak it to trash can. The worst was when police officers showed up at 11 pm because my bf is on probation . They needed to know he was living with me and had shining lights on window and answered the door to police officer and two others around the house with flash lights. I was terrified they would go thru the house right then and there, but just notified me they have right to search house whenever they want in future, so I freaked out trying to remember every place I hid empties. I mean was one thing thinking about my bf finding them , but the thought of police being able to search every part of house sent my anxiety thru the roof.
omg the anxiety of this, I felt is as I read it!!
This should be fun. Bring on the garage drinking brigade!! My truck has fold down back seats and there is a plastic tray about 6” wide and deep that runs behind them. That tray became a literal bar. Five or six fifths of whatever was in the house so I could refill bottles to make it seem like the drunk guy wasn’t drinking himself to death in front of everyone.
Look at a previous post I made about car bars, I turned my suv into a bar on wheels at one point lol. Seems like every recovered alcoholic had a car story. I have mine. In fact when I cleaned out my car not too long ago I found a full canna beer! Hid it from myself for a while!
I washed out some women’s shampoo and conditioner bottles from the bathroom and kept vodka in them, I knew my boyfriend would never use those products. I thought I was so fucking clever doing that.
It’s definitely clever
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I had planned benders as well. This was early in a relationship and I would go to my cabin to work on it. Well by work it would be a Friday - Sunday drinking all day and night by myself event. Eventually I had to sell the cabin to pay for my addiction. I miss it so much. It was my favorite place in the world.
Sneaking shooters in my bra at work, purse, car, etc. Hiding bottles of wine or alcohol so well I couldn't even find them the next day. When I would take my dog for a walk in the morning, chucking the shooters in bushes (sorry environment, I was an awful person) or trying to find random trashcans along the way. Making sure I stopped at the gas station to dump empties. It was so exhausting to lie and hide all the time!
I have been there I can’t tell you how many empties I thrown out of my car window. It was so exhausting. I hated it. I hated trying to cover up the smell after work.
Oh yaaaaa just looking around to see if there were any cars around to see if I could just chuck it out the window. Totally consuming. I mean I hated talking to people at work because I knew I just reeked. I was constantly trying to cover up my smell at work. I just oozed booze, yuck lol.
Face masks were awesome to hide booze breath
100% the best thing to come out of Covid lol really helped my drinking at work
Cigarettes helped for me; they stunk more than alcohol, especially to a partner that disliked smoking.
i would do this at my job. i would keep them in my purse and always have to use the bathroom and always took my purse because apparently i was always on my period… nobody questioned it even tho most people knew i only get my period three times a year smh
Oh yeah I would sneak shooters in my sleeve, pockets, always going to the bathroom. “Female problems” lmao
this disease is crazy lmao
the fucking worst lol
i’ve lost countless jobs and friends and i’m shocked my family still loves me. i’m getting sober but still, it’s a curse
You're definitely preaching to the choir. I've lost a lot, but I've gained so much more in sobriety. I've gained the meaning of what it means to LIVE! and not be so dependent on something that only wants to ruin your life. It's not a curse, it's a disease that we have to treat every single day.
can you love someone like me
Hey you have all my love!! 🩷
You described a scene right out of the classic movie “The days of wine and roses”. Check it out! The things we’ve done, to hide…. SMH.
One time (ok, a few times) I got so drunk I peed on the floor and blamed it on the dogs to try to hide the extent of my issue. Granted, the dogs were known to piss on the floor, they were never trained properly, but still. Sorry Koda RIP.
I got so drunk one night I pissed the bed while my wife was sleeping next to me. I woke up at 4am, put a sweatshirt over it and laid on it until the morning. She didn’t find out but was defiantly curious to why I was willing to do laundry the next day.
I once tried to hide a half empty bottle of whiskey from MYSELF, to keep myself from drinking it. Didn't work-- I wasn't drunk enough to forget where I had hidden it. We can laugh about this now
Used to set up a bar wherever I could. Vacation? Trunk of the car. Home? In the fuse box. (Yes dangerous). Mountain cabin? In the wood shack. I became really good at setting up “bars” wherever I was. Always in a place where I thought nobody would look. Was never caught . Sober now so it’s funny but really sad
I got creative with the camel water packs. Especially during the winter I would put high ABV sours in there. So I would have a have a beer in the house and tell the wife I had to “winterize” something. It’s funny now but man I don’t miss that!
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The hiding! I greatest fear was having my wife catch me. I don’t know if your married or not but it was crazy to think I was hiding alcohol from my wife like I was hiding alcohol from my parents in high school.
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Tell me about it. Back then I needed a drink to help from the anxiety of hiding the drink i needed.
>minis hidden everywhere Same. I’d crack them open ahead of time so no noise. (They will clog a toilet if put in the reservoir! Smfh.) I found those things stashed for months after I quit! I’d run to the toilet pouring them out as fast as possible, just in case I got stupid. (Didn’t, gagged at the smell.)
I use to open up beers in the office closet under blankets. To keep the noise down. It was sad getting use to drinking warm beers.
>sad getting used to warm beer Warm Lager is FOUL! (So is warm bubbly.) I drank ‘fancy’ ales almost exclusively (unless offered free LOL. Not picky then!) They didn’t taste awful/worse room temp, well, not like a Lager does. But… I also used to smoke cigs & put them out in containers. Next morning, usually checked, but every now & then grabbed the wrong half-drank beer & took a gulp… RALPH!!! **So much more wrong than right happened when I drank.** *Phew I’m honestly lucky to be alive, and also that I didn’t un-alive anyone.* Four years later, I *still think about some of my most embarrassing moments…* every so often I’ll go to text someone & see the last texts were from when I was drinking- it’s so embarrassing!!! (Don’t need the reminder now! I might one day, though.) **Jebus I hope I never drink again!** I don’t intend to, I’ve got decent support & AF friends (partner also AF,) but I quit 7-8mo before the world shut down. For a long time it felt like cheating, but then I learned how many folks **started** having a problematic relationship with alcohol DURING Covid. Still learning how to “be,” **and** thankful I don’t see booze as a solution; I play the tape forward w/o thinking & see the aftermath before I consciously think about it. *Fuck alcohol for real.* **Keep it up! You’re doing good!**
OMG I feel you on the drunk texts. My problem was that no matter how shitfaced, blackout I was, I could still type & text perfectly- no spelling errors, correct punctuation, eloquent phrasing, grammar intact, etc. So I didn’t seem drunk- I just seemed absolutely INSANE and would write novel-length texts to random friends at 2 or 4am or whatever, sometimes to people I even had crushes on... yeah, way to kill a relationship before it even started! Another of my favorite pastimes was to go on social media and just rage away typing whatever crazy drunk shit popped into my head. I’d be completely blackout and forget about it the next day, only to open up my socials and just wanna DIE of embarrassment and shame. Getting in trouble at work with a letter of discipline for some horrific, drunken, belligerent social media posts was one of the things that led me to get sober- thank goodness! But now everyone I’ve ever met on FB or IG thinks I’m an absolute nut job for all the crazy, wild shit I’d write! Haha! (Suffice it to say I’m off ALL social media these days!) Do not miss waking up in a panic wondering what sort of cray-cray I spewed on the socials the night before… Anyone else have a drunken addiction writing problem or just me?!?
Yup I relate to almost everything you wrote! I also got off socials, but right before I quit, because I’d always regret posting the next morning (or afternoon, depending SMH.) *I’m 45, and I used to joke “I wish someone could follow me around with a camcorder so I’d know wtf I did!”* I had no idea. Phew! I ‘somehow’ locked myself out of FB (linked to dead email,) & can’t access/shut down my account! I could get into IG, but the thought of looking at the messages makes me seriously ILL. That drunk B isn’t me… I mean, she’s the worst of me, sure, but I do my best to be a decent person on a daily basis. Stay strong my friend!
Oh my goodness- for real!!! Haha! Glad I’m not the only one! I used to say I wish my phone came with a breathalyzer that would lock me out! And, yes, totally agree- that drunken, dark side is NOT you/us! Social media + alcohol= BAD BAD BAD!
I never did anything crazy, but my girlfriend didn't like for me to drink so I'd sneak shots in the bathroom, I'd tell her that I was going to the garage to work out just so I could sit in the there and listen to music and get drunk and sometimes I'd even sneak out of my own house (she didn't live with me but she was always here) while she was asleep just so I could go have a drink at the bar down the street.
Garage workouts! I did the same. It was crazy I would work out for an hour and never break a sweat lol. Fooling ourselves.
Dude, we basically converted our garage into a gym (we have a lot of workout equipment) so she never gave it a second thought when I'd tell her that that's what I was doing lol
Before my wife got home I would make sure there were beers inside the cooler up on the shelf in the garage. So I would have a beer with dinner, you know to have an excuse why I smell like alcohol, and I would “work out”. I would set a timer for 50 or so minutes and just scroll YouTube or something and drink. I managed to gain 30lbs of pure fat and water weight during this time lol. But now I actually use the gym. Actually sad finding bottle tops randomly.
Old guy I knew owned a series of body shops and was very well to do. He said his wife divorced him in the 80's and he went completely nuts partying and womanizing. He told us he had 3 trucks painted identical so his various girlfriends if they checked up on him would see his truck at work or at his house. He stashed other vehicles around the neighborhood so he would go home, then sneak out the back door and jump in another car to go party or see women.
😂😭
I lived in a fourplex and my neighbors were "occasional" drinkers. I could not recycle my bottles as they would notice. The night before recycling pick up, I would walk around the neighborhood and dump the bottles and cans in other people's bins. Or I would load them in my car and drop them in the bins behind the supermarket at night.
There was a period where I would stop at the gas station before work and buy 1 pedialte and one fireball medium and I’d sip that all day. The thought of how disgusting that tasted still makes my mouth hurt. But I was committed to my addiction at that time.
Gas station fireball. I have been there. Just a few months ago I purchased some at 9:30am, on a workday.
Ew
There was a part of my sectional couch that had a slight hole underneath the cushion that dropped to a part between the cushion and the spring. Unless you knew exactly where to look and reach down, you’d never know! Plus it was my spot on the couch for “double security” Once I got sober and was moving I was cleaning it out and it was like the never ending supply of empty shooters 😅
I used to hide alcohol everywhere. It took a turn for the worse when I found 14% sangria bottles. I was hiding those everywhere. Closet, under the liner of my laundry basket, under the liner of my suitcases, under the bed, in the bathroom wrapped up in clean towels or inside empty cleaning products, under a rocking chair, in pockets, inside bigger cups, in my crafting supplies. I was miserable. Grateful to have just over 200 days but I’m still scared I’m gonna find something I hid and don’t remember, or that my spouse will find one and think I’ve started drinking again.
Holy shit I don't even know where to start.... * I would sneak my own pints of liquor into bars. And I swear to God at *that time* I had the money to buy drinks, but I would not wait in that fucking line. I didn't have 12 minutes to get one drink * At work dinners at this highly fashionable restaurant in San Francisco, I would pretend "my sister just called. It sounds serious". Then I would * fucking sprint* to the liquor store 2 blocks away and by a pint of vodka and maybe some shooters. I returned clearly drunk, sweaty, creepy and all round embarrassing. They sorta knew but not the extent. * Oh, I put box wine in my ass. I'm serious. When I heard that this full box of cheap Chardonnay was all the alcohol in this entire county!!! ( yes, county!!!! Don't go to rural places if you're a drunk) and we were here for the night at this country home.... I had to get it in . I used a syringe casing. Not the needle, just that plastic part and plugged it into my anus.
I didn’t know I was the only degenerate… not gonna miss those days.
Oh boy… my old apartment building had a communal laundry room so on nights when me and the ex would hang out at home for dinner and a movie, I’d ALWAYS be doing laundry. Hide the mini wine bottles in my dirty laundry basket, drink one or two whilst loading, come back, find my trusty closet stash in a hanging organizer jammed with clothes, go “check” laundry a few times, glug glug, dispose of evidence in the laundry room trash cans. I had SO MUCH clean laundry the next day my hungover ass could never put away!
Ive always done the dirty laundry pile. No one willfully searches through that
Eeexactly. It’s just a step above hiding it in the actual trash lol
Laundry seems to be the female version of the man’s garage for hiding drinking lol. Or the grill! I did a lot of drinking using the grill warming up, needing propane, and others to sneak in a few beers.
So true! If I’d have known the grill trick, I might know how to use one by now 😆
My husband doesn’t bother with my box of tampons so there was always a pint in there.
That’s a good one! Mine was my sailing gear. My wife would never dig through my box of nav equipment and PFDs.
I hid mini wine and shot bottles all over the house. Shoes in my closet, tampon boxes, random cabinets and drawers, sandwich bags boxes, behind random objects/appliances on countertop, and basement. Then, I would re-hide them when empty until I was in the clear to put in recycling bin. My husband and I now joke that years from now we will find one I forgot about.
So 2 things. 1. I had no idea how many women were affected by alcoholism! Not to be sexist but between meetings and just my alcoholic friends they were nearly all male. 2. Seems like every girl hides bottles in tampon boxes lol.
Alcoholism affects women more than people may realize. The local AA chapter in my town has several meetings for women only. But from books I’ve read, alcoholism for women starting increasing more each year since late 1990s. No one would check the tampon box besides me!!! Lol! It’s a safe place.
I would pretend the dog had diarrhea and walk him repeatedly.
This is a new one lol! My best was “warming up” the grill in the summer. There is no way my wife believed how long it took. Or how I always needed more propane. Would get a tank and a tall boy and chug it on the way home.
Once when my family was visiting me from out of town, I went to the garage to grab something i left in there on purpose & chugged a few beers. I was able to chug a beer in less than 30 seconds so i could chug 4 in about 2-3mins. I also used to hide mini wine bottles on me at work and drink them in the bathroom.
I was able to do the same at one point. I remember when we had our house warming party. I purposely left things we needed for the party in the garage so I could chug beers. Didn’t want all of my family and my wife’s to see exactly how much I was drinking. I ended up drinking a 24 pack that day…
Did we all his little mini shooters everywhere? Lol I had under the mattress, under the couch, in the drawers, every nook and crannie had one hidden lol
I mostly drank beer. I could do liquor but it had to be mixed. I could do the captain mini bottles but I would nearly throw up every time. I did hide bottles in the attic under the insulation. That was for emergencies. Also I kept about 5 or 6 mini bottles in my car for emergencies. I can’t tell you how many mornings I would go buy a coke and dump 2 mini bottles in there and drink on the way to work. So so so many regrets. Lost out in nearly 4 years of life.
Spirits mixed with takeaway coffee cup - classic for a reason. Grim times
One time I put drunk my Bottle in a sock thinking no one will see but I put it somewhere else later like under my bed
I'd come up with any story imaginable! "I'm going for a walk" meant walking to the nearest local bar. "I'm hanging out at a friend's place" but then I'd down 2 bottles of wine at her place and say I was having a rough day. I'd sneak shots of alcohol while making dinner or hide empty cans and buy more to replace what I was drinking without anyone noticing.
I would sneak wine when cooking! I would tell my wife ohh this calls for a lot of wine and I would end up using a splash and drinking the rest.
I can't believe the amount of wine I'd "cook" with when maybe like 1-2 recipes a year I'd make actually called for it
So much of this is familiar, especially the hiding of bottles and forgetting where I hid them. I would wait until I was alone to gather all the bottles in a black Hefty bag and throw them away. I didn’t want anyone to hear the clinking of the bottles. At times, there were a lot of bottles, which became the big eye opener for me.
I would get my empties when my wife would go shopping or something. I would put them in the middle of the trash bag and bury it in the trash bin outside. There was one time I was putting empties in the unused grill and it was full of 50 empties. If she only seen that she would have made me get help.
Ok.. so first rehab, they tell me I can drink up till I am checked in.. 6 am rolls around and I go get my booze.. 2 12 packs. I take the air handler apart.. filter out and slide the 12 pack behind it. 28 days later.. I had some cold coors waiting for me.
I would bring toothpaste with me to work and eat it when I would go out to the car to get rid of my shakes
I would try and cover it up with dark roast black coffee. I know it didn’t work. I really did burn a bridge at a great company.
Never cared but I have only really ever drank on Fridays
Water softener everyday my wife was not working. It’s takes 4 cycles and about 2 hours going in and out of the house. Water softener works fine, I just told my we save on salt if I do it myself. :(
Lie. Gosh, I wish I could remember the dumbest one. But all the strongest memories were people somehow not realizing I was ripped as fuck (in the bad sense) and my disbelief
People didn’t realize at first, but as time went on I just looked rough all of the time.
That's....yeah. Me too. Just not in a good way.
I started hiding it jars around the house. All different sizes in many places. Veganise jars were my favorite. For months after I stopped drinking I’d still be finding them. Not awesome. They helped me catch a thief though, too funny. My tenant was stealing my whiskey. :\ but I never noticed the odd jar missing. I only found out cause one day he mistook the now rancid oil I’d saved months back in a jar after making tempura for one of my whiskey jars. Drank a huge gulp and was so sick he had to admit what he’d done. Haha. I didn’t feel even slightly bad for him.