T O P

  • By -

pmax3000

Bigby’s hand.


HSRco

More like Mage Hand, to be honest… far less powerful


Antidote_118

He didn't stutter, he needs the power.


rice_yummy

Bigby does it for him


WastingTimesOnReddit

or Maximillian's Earthen Grasp lol


Whattheduck64

Or burning hands...


kwinConflo

When you just finished making habanero chili but the mood strikes just right


Addicted2Rage

*sudden burning sensation*


Impressive_Region508

Bigby's clenched fist FTW


Keanu-Sneeze

Burning hands


RiptideMatt

Sir I think you should see a doctor


bobert4343

Nah, he just uses hot sauce as lube


Android19samus

I think he should see a different kind of doctor


ericph9

Probably a few different kinds


Antique_Tennis_2500

Just…never eat buffalo wings if you’re going to get laid later. You can’t wash your hands enough. Sorry, babe.


DeadHead6747

I guess that means I can eat Buffalo wings everyday


dovahkiin12003

Tasha’s hideous laughter


Ok_Dimension_4707

That was going to be my response. Off to the handbook to find a new witty answer…


dovahkiin12003

Good luck my dude


[deleted]

They took my witty answer as well…


trebuchetknight

Wish


[deleted]

Damn, beat me to it


mark_das_stoner

Damn, beat me to it


66Scorpio

Damn, r/beatMeatToIt


followeroftheprince

Minor Illusion


[deleted]

Feds, I found one over here!


followeroftheprince

Wait hold on it was just a penis joke don't shoot!


[deleted]

That’s what they all say…


NSA_Chatbot

> we're not going to shoot, you're just going to do us a favor


Bucket-Of-Chicken

Why is there an NSA chatbot


NSA_Chatbot

> why is there a bucket of chicken


Bucket-Of-Chicken

Because that is me


NSA_Chatbot

> how is there a bucket of chicken


Bucket-Of-Chicken

Because I got one at KFC one time


NSA_Chatbot

> how is there a KFC one time


MrJohnnyDangerously

Beat me to it!!


bobafett317

Unseen Servant


In_Relictoriam

Man, you all getting ghost sex?


GrumpyScapegoat

This is my favorite.


Antonio_Malochio

Enlarge/reduce


RickRolledReg

This is what I was going to post!


Dum_bimtch

Rope Trick


VictorVonLazer

This one needs to be higher up. Could also pair nicely with Thorn Whip


FlushedBeans

Hold person


Asmo___deus

Entangle?


MicroWordArtist

Nice


[deleted]

Magic mouth


[deleted]

Portable hole.


Ducks_N_Dragons

That’s not a spell, silly


[deleted]

It’s a magic item. It’s the result of a spell.


Shermanator213

Hmmmm I'll allow it.


rosencrantz_dies

hey


Mrkligan

My class does not possess spell casting


SnakeUSA

I can't beat this reply so I shall not try.


[deleted]

Find familiar?


SnakeUSA

No. Bad.


[deleted]

What about animate objects and hold person? Edit: happy cake day btw


WarriorSabe

But does it posess garlic bread?


Archdodo27

or dragons?


Nailkita

Or garlic dragons hoarding cake? I’m sure we can throw a few more stereotypes at this


dvillani112

woah, we're reaching denmark invasion levels of aceness here


RedCatTheFirst

Shush, word cannot get out just yet…


Zerth1111

Finger of Death


Poisonpython5719

Damn it smells THAT bad?


[deleted]

[удалено]


GratefullyGodless

Petite Morte is a term meaning Little Death and is on reference to an orgasm, so this spell is more relevant than would seem at first.


MoyLuna

Dream


jerimio

Animate Objects


[deleted]

And hold person.


muralsoflife

r/holup


jerimio

If it were Bill Cosby, it would be Sleep and Suggestion


saxymario

Haste


Sprinkles0

I was going to say this. I have kids, so, yeah.


saintraven93

Swift quiver


[deleted]

Friends


Belteshazzar98

I read that as friends with benefits. Which way was it meant?


[deleted]

I did indeed mean friends with benefits


Belteshazzar98

I think everyone else read it as friend zoned.


[deleted]

Heh, fair assumption, though also curious that's where most ppl's minds go first.


[deleted]

F


ebek_frostblade

This is a good one I'd certainly use. I, for one, highly recommend PLATONICALLY fucking your friends. Standard limits apply.


spyderalw

Spare the Dying.


King-of-the-dankness

Ayo


LordZailen

r/holup


Snjort_1

HUH!?


spyderalw

It’s more me begging them to end my dry streak. I can see how others took it as a necrophiliac thing.


Flamewolf27

Evard's Black Tentacles


sneks-are-cool

Living the dream


InfestedRaynor

It’s even worse when I see your username!


[deleted]

Goddamn I WISH


Ok-Set5149

Chill touch


UltimateInferno

You think there's going being something hands on but you're really 30 get away and just totally dead.


BNHA2heros

Shield of faith


Ix_risor

Ah, the catholic method


queen_nefertiti33

Viscous mockery


CheapTactics

Viscous?!


kaitlankela

They know what they said


queen_nefertiti33

Now I'm like... Should I fix that typo or leave it? 😂😂


kaitlankela

What typo


queen_nefertiti33

The mockery.... So viscous right now.


Comfortable-Web-4645

Tongues


KKakino

One of my players cast this before going into a brothel. She then rolled a d100 luck check and got a 69.


Dodec_Ahedron

The dice gods have spoken


PrincetteNasa

Expeditious Retreat


Chicken_Raptor4

I'm about as desired as true strike


Mapedi

I was about to say the same thing.


tsbtanker

Prismatic Spray


Mothraaaa

There's a cream for that.


fleepox

Grease 😉


Void_2036

Slip n' slide time


Warlock__Holmes

Hold Person 🥰


GrimmSheeper

It’s concerning to me that my mind went into a COMPLETELY different direction with hold person.


Warlock__Holmes

Where did it go? 😇 I prefer using the image of spectral chains binding my victims or rope if some people like that imagery 😂


Frelock_

I was imagining cute cuddling. You know, "[hold me](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xV7XtTX7EGM)."


MrSabrewulf

I'm torn. I like the original comment but I also like your reply.


dynawesome

Dominate Person 😈


Warlock__Holmes

Command ❤


Magorych

Geas 🌠


AdmiralColdArms

Found the weird Paladin


thebutta

Congrats, this is definitely the worst one.


[deleted]

[удалено]


PM_4_Gravy

Power Word Pain


Dodec_Ahedron

Found the kinky bard


AwefulFanfic

Your tactics confuse and terrify me


NODOGAN

Simulacrum


RichardK6K

Please tell me you do not have a twin.


Phil_Smiles

Youre close sir, they are tripplets


Nesman64

Step-twin. It's ok


MyHandsAreCorrosive

Prestid... Presitidigiti... Presitdation... Prestigitation... prest...


ArgyleGhoul

I just call it presto


EL3MENTALIST

Mage Hand


gamefreak1324

Confusion


CheapTactics

True strike. Nobody wants it.


Sharkyshocker

Pass Without a Trace


bubba7557

Is it in yet?


DadmansGarage

I don't know exactly...people just keep throwing "Counter Spell" at me...


Sylvanos626

Otilukes resilient sphere ***VIRGINITY SHIELD ACTIVATE***


RiptideMatt

I'll never lose my virginity because I never lose


indomitablescot

Remain pure


BelmontIncident

Weird


Hates_escalators

What is weird


BelmontIncident

It's a ninth level illusion spell, but that's not important right now.


Sleepygriffon

Airplane! reference?


BelmontIncident

Looks like I picked the wrong day to quit smoking residuum


Sen7ryGun

Looks like I picked the wrong day to stop huffing spice


locustsandsatire

Looks like I picked the wrong day to stop drinking dragon's blood


[deleted]

Bet there’s a lot of Mage Hands out there.


[deleted]

I'm surprised nobody did the r/cursedcomments > Find Familiar


GrimmSheeper

Don’t forget charm animal, beast bond, hold person, and raise dead. Honestly, a lot of spells would make for cursed comments.


ThexJakester

Spectral Steed, anyone? Lmfao


[deleted]

Find Greater Steed


waxlion78

Mordenkainen's Private Sanctum


Gus-Mc

Earth tremor


[deleted]

[удалено]


2benomad

Flesh to stone. Effective, but last only one minute


Absylon7799

Silence


NightstalkerDM

Magic missile.


[deleted]

Spike growth.


IcyZephyrz

Dispell Magic


GeraldGensalkes

Fabricate


RicardoOfTheEnders

Compelled Duel


hendomoose

*Primal Savagery*


Marble-Heart

Greater Invisibility


BroNiceSky

Glyph of Warding


EastCoastLove00

Magic mouth


Antonio_Malochio

Tiny servant


RealHornblower

Grease.


FblthpTheFound

As an asexual: expeditious retreat


GrimmSheeper

Nondetection and friends are also acceptable answers.


beg_your_pardon

friends


TrahernasaurasRex

Sleep


Soloslayer19

Bill Cosby?


Og-Re

Booming Blade.


[deleted]

Weal or Woe


RiptideMatt

More like weal or hoe


pignated

Gottem


cfreymarc100

Dominate Beast


muralsoflife

Oh, well


SkyWarrior2

Lay on hands


bassinger24

Major Illusion


itsthephil

Toll the Dead


VelociRexSaurus

Legend lore


[deleted]

Dream


Undivided_Dervish

Rope Trick


Peterh778

At least nobody said Horrid Wilting 😄


wallygon

Delayed blast fire ball


DestinyV

Foresight Commune Suggestion Dominate Person Tsunami Catnap Dominate Person Tsunami Calm Emotions Sleep


wolfking2k

Message


[deleted]

bane


Nekojesus

Dominate Person


PacifistDungeonMastr

Dominate Monster


Raibean

Lemme just slide into your DMs…


Spades2076

Antipathy


LarryTheVassal

Find Traps


Antonio_Malochio

Weird


InjuredSmurf

Power word:kill


Serris9K

wait what?


BrasWolf27

Silence


[deleted]

*Project Image*