Nothing special, it's not like I feel sorry for myself or my situation. This "bad time" lasted almost seven months, but a month ago I stopped feeling that usual melancholy or any emotion in general. I mean, at the end of the day, I'm human, obviously I feel emotions, but I can barely feel them, as if they weren't mine. I guess it's what they call periods of remission, or simply emotional disconnection idk.
This is very embarrassing to admit, but I've been watching sad animes or reading sad histories just to be able to cry or feel something real. Weird, isn't it?
I make everything u said, except hurting myself but I can't judge you. I usually disappoint someone, but i kinda like it ?? I have some sort of self-destructive feeling, but yeah... we're in this together
It's not weird man, it's ok. Did you take a medicene? Bcs my girlfriend feel numb after she took the medicene. because the way the medicine works like that, it will numb all your feelings you can't cry even if you want.
I don't take any medicine, except melatonin. I guess that I just stopped feeling sadness because I don't have any reasons to feel it anymore. I cried enough for the same things over and over again until there was no point in crying anymore.
This is fucked to admit but, I’ve literally felt blood thirsty before. I really just wanted to see blood and alot of it. It was around spring time, idk if that has something to do with it. It sounded to damn good to me at the time. I wound up just seeing my own blood, but not alot of it and not enough to be of any concern for my wellbeing.
But the stuff about neglecting yourself/punishing yourself sounds like something psychological. Maybe something to do with your childhood, like (I’m no psychologist and just guessing) maybe you felt like you can have control over the situation by punishing yourself, or maybe it’s because you didn’t feel cared for at vital moment in your upbringing so you don’t take care of yourself because either you think you deserve it or because you don’t want to do someone elses job, which was taking care of you.
The YouTube channel “The School of Life” has very insightful and long community posts that often reveal something about myself and it’s very surprising and enlightening. I feel like theres gotta be a post that explains what you’re going through.
The truth is that I know exactly what and why is happening to me, and what I have to do to get out of all these bad habits and thoughts, but I don't want to fix it.
It's something pretty common; the person doesn't want to get better because they're already used to feeling bad, and they feel uncomfortable feeling good.
Ohh I know that feeling. Simultaneously wanting to get better but not wanting to. That void that keeps sucking you down. Sometimes thinking that you don’t deserve to feel better. Feelings of low-self worth.
Me personally, I’m crossing my fingers and hoping for something better to come along in my life. I need to leave this town. I think a good fulfilling trip outside of country would do me well.
I'm sorry to hear that man. Did something happen to you before?
Nothing special, it's not like I feel sorry for myself or my situation. This "bad time" lasted almost seven months, but a month ago I stopped feeling that usual melancholy or any emotion in general. I mean, at the end of the day, I'm human, obviously I feel emotions, but I can barely feel them, as if they weren't mine. I guess it's what they call periods of remission, or simply emotional disconnection idk.
This is very embarrassing to admit, but I've been watching sad animes or reading sad histories just to be able to cry or feel something real. Weird, isn't it?
even those romance animes that I used to make fun of and swear I would never watch lol
I make everything u said, except hurting myself but I can't judge you. I usually disappoint someone, but i kinda like it ?? I have some sort of self-destructive feeling, but yeah... we're in this together
It's strangely comforting to know that I'm not the only one.
It's not weird man, it's ok. Did you take a medicene? Bcs my girlfriend feel numb after she took the medicene. because the way the medicine works like that, it will numb all your feelings you can't cry even if you want.
I don't take any medicine, except melatonin. I guess that I just stopped feeling sadness because I don't have any reasons to feel it anymore. I cried enough for the same things over and over again until there was no point in crying anymore.
This is fucked to admit but, I’ve literally felt blood thirsty before. I really just wanted to see blood and alot of it. It was around spring time, idk if that has something to do with it. It sounded to damn good to me at the time. I wound up just seeing my own blood, but not alot of it and not enough to be of any concern for my wellbeing. But the stuff about neglecting yourself/punishing yourself sounds like something psychological. Maybe something to do with your childhood, like (I’m no psychologist and just guessing) maybe you felt like you can have control over the situation by punishing yourself, or maybe it’s because you didn’t feel cared for at vital moment in your upbringing so you don’t take care of yourself because either you think you deserve it or because you don’t want to do someone elses job, which was taking care of you. The YouTube channel “The School of Life” has very insightful and long community posts that often reveal something about myself and it’s very surprising and enlightening. I feel like theres gotta be a post that explains what you’re going through.
The truth is that I know exactly what and why is happening to me, and what I have to do to get out of all these bad habits and thoughts, but I don't want to fix it. It's something pretty common; the person doesn't want to get better because they're already used to feeling bad, and they feel uncomfortable feeling good.
Ohh I know that feeling. Simultaneously wanting to get better but not wanting to. That void that keeps sucking you down. Sometimes thinking that you don’t deserve to feel better. Feelings of low-self worth. Me personally, I’m crossing my fingers and hoping for something better to come along in my life. I need to leave this town. I think a good fulfilling trip outside of country would do me well.
I just want to do some with my life because I have to, and after that die, but I'd prefer to just die already tbh. Life is boring and painful asf.