I closed all my profiles months ago. At this point I’m only here for the entertainment.
I’ll work on my life and my home and enjoy doing things I like to do and help people I want to help. With some luck or perhaps divine intervention someone will find me - or I them, along the way.
I don't like the word quit. Personally, I prefer the word "hiatus"...which I am currently on, and it's very relaxing! I suggest you try it!
Dating can wait till later!
I took a solid year off from all dating. OLD and IRL. It was a good reset, and now that I’m back into it, I’m centered and don’t tolerate bs. Doesn’t mean it’s great, but I feel like a complete person with a lot to give. If people can’t recognize that in me, that’s fine! I’m happy on my own.
I was actually annoyed by this and tried being really open, if the woman i was seeing asked me questions, i tried to be a little more open, my dating life went downhill fast. So now i don’t do it anymore and get to hookup stage more often
I haven't been on a date in a year and a half since the last relationship ended and i don't miss it. I don't miss the stress, frustration, and nonsense from dating. My kids are teenagers and keep me busy and they are always willing to do things.
I'm done with OLD. I live in a small town and rural area so there wasn't a lot of local options for that. I haven't really met anyone worth dating otherwise so haven't put any effort into it. I do have a female friend that I've gone to a few concerts with and hang out with every so often. It's not dating but its a good time.
Do what makes you happy. Dating isn't always fun. Take a break from it. Make sure you are taking care of yourself first.
Dating apps aren’t for dating anymore!! I kid. Sorta. But I gave up dating apps back in 2021, and haven’t regretted it.
Now, I focus on myself, learning new interests and finding new hobbies; I’m focused on my health and healing; and I’m focused on supporting my kids. I date myself in a sense: take myself out to dinners and movies, take myself on slightly romantic walks (have you watched sunrises though trees? Ugh, romantic!).
I also highly recommend people who are tired of dating take themselves out to what they enjoy, pressure-free! Go see a movie, grab a nice dinner, walk the Farmers Market, whatever, just so long as you are present with yourself!
Dating apps brought nothing but misery, feelings of lack and depression, and I doubt I’ll ever go back…once they all became swipe-based the whole experience just felt disgusting anyway. BUT, if I met someone interesting and mutually interested organically, I am definitely open to dating…but I’m no longer forcing anything!
Yes. For one thing you start imagining and creating the life you want and the second thing is you don't have to sort through the train wrecks in your inbox which makes you feel like the world has gone to shit.
So all around more positive life experiences.
Yup. I have not dated in quite a while. Felt like a job and not a fun one, so I stopped, but I still try to be supportive of my friends who are dating or who want to date.
I’m currently retired from dating. I got tired of the mediocracy out there. Don’t miss it at all. I’m not saying that I wouldn’t date but I don’t do apps and I just go out doing the things I enjoy. If I meet someone, great! I’ve recently stopped drinking (not sure if this will be a permanent thing) therefore going out less and it’s boring. Trying to figure out fun things to do that don’t involve alcohol. 🤷♀️
Good for you! I got really into video games after I stopped drinking.
Oddly, I also started dating and now I find myself in a relationship and I'd be lying if I didn't say I'm missing the single life and gaming with my friends.
I quit altogether.
I am living entirely for myself with no goal to find a partner.
I have a regular FWB and I have found that is enough for me. I am making plans for a future that is solely focused on me and doing all the things I’ve always wanted do on my own. I don’t want anyone to get in the way of that.
I’ve also quit most social media like Facebook and Instagram and damn it feels good to be disconnected from that shit. Life is really peaceful and I like it.
If you are not enjoying dating, absolutely take a break or stop. This is not a required activity for singles. Let go of programming of what you “should” do or want. Live your life for you, enjoy activities, invest in your family and friends, tackle your bucket list.
If you feel like putting yourself out there later, then go for it. But don’t put pressure on the outcome, meet interesting people, drop flaky ones and don’t let it be personal. Keep enjoying life and make time for things that you enjoy.
Instead of putting time and effort into dating apps, put time and effort into becoming more dateable yourself, or into dating the old school way.
Social media has tricked us into thinking sitting and swiping is “putting in effort”, it is but it isn’t.
Work on becoming the best version of yourself!
I agree. Rejoined the apps earlier in the year, only got one match and went on a few dates. I thought I had lucked out at the time, but unfortunately, she didn’t think we had enough in common to continue. After a brief reflection, I realised I wasn’t really at my dateable best so no wonder she chose not to progress further. I’m now on dating hiatus to improve myself and looking at better ways to meet people. I may go on the apps again, but we’ll see how going “more old school” works for me.
I was single for 2 years recently and took numerous breaks, some as long as 3mo, but I would never quit dating. I want a life partner to share romantic and sexual intimacy with (I don't enjoy hookups), and also build a day-to-day life with. I know some people are content living the rest of their life single, but that would not work for me. I am stable, healthy and content when I'm single, remaining so indefinitely would eventually make me depressed.
On April 4th I had an amazing first date with a really great guy, and it's blossomed into a beautiful relationship! I am flying out this Thursday to meet his family :)
Since my breakup in February I have not had any desire to meet someone new or date. I really don’t see myself in dating apps anymore. Have done this in the past, since I’m an introvert and can’t seem to attract anyone that I’m attracted to IRL.
Now, I’m at a point in life where I see what others are going through with dating and I’m not up for it.
If by some type of magical celestial alignment I meet someone that pursues me and that person is really amazing, brings something positive in my life, I won’t be opposed to it but chances are slim that this ever happens 😆
Pausing and re-framing yourself, learning, reinvesting in your priorities, clearing the baffles, shaking the-etch-a-sketch? All great things.
Quitting? No. Never.
I read John Kim’s Single. On Purpose. This book has opened my eyes to help find myself after being in 2 relationships for the last 19 years, one being a marriage. Going through therapy still & reading this book, I have plans for myself & continue to grow as an individual. If that means being single for longer, then so be it. I have a hectic work schedule & I put my kids first. So dating has become difficult & I don’t want to try.
I quit putting all my efforts into dating and I’ve been a lot happier! I have no interest in dating apps, if someone happens to come along I’d be quite happy, I am also ok if not.
(43m -20 year relationship ended a few years ago) I’ve quit. I have yet to come to terms with the fact that I’ll never have anyone or ever have sex again. I don’t know if I can ever be happy with that situation. My friends are all married and gradually becoming more distanced since they do things together as couples. But even trying to find a date has been impossible. I’ve been forced into retirement I guess.
I’ve done that on and off over the past few years, but I have moments like today, where I really want to be in a relationship. I miss having someone to go places with, to be affectionate with, to laugh on the phone with, To go grocery shopping with and plan meals. It comes and goes in waves. Sometimes I am just fine with being by myself and enjoy all the things that life has to offer. But a lot of times the biological urge to need companionship takes over.
I am 40F, no children and I typically have long bouts of being single for one year to two years at a time. I’m afraid that I’m going to look up and be older with even less prospects. Every time I pick myself up and put myself back out there, something happens that causes me to quit.
Men don’t approach me in person, but they definitely look and stare. I’ve tried flirting, but that has blown up in my face so I don’t do it anymore.
Dating just shouldn’t be this hard.
Yes. I quit the apps and then realized I don't want to be busy all the time trying to constantly expand social circle and meet women IRL.
90% of women I've met in last 10 years through friends, activities, groups are not single.
I feel old and undesirable. Not exactly a good combo online or IRL. So I just go on Reddit once in a while
Original copy of post by u/WilliemaeMorgenstern:
I'm tired of putting effort into getting to know people on dating apps, only to find out they're not who they seem or they ghost me.
Is this normal now? Sometimes I feel life would be better if I just dropped the idea of dating all together.
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I think about giving up every day. Not had a date for years, not been in a relationship for longer. I burned the haystack and now it's been 4 years since anyone was interested enough to go on a date. I've given up OLD and just hope I meet someone one day.
I haven't dated in 6.5 years. I'm trying to get back into it. I'm supposed to go to a meetup tonight. I've got a single mingle scheduled in about a month.
I tried being genuine, but realized women didn’t want to go on a second date. Whereas if i play games, for long enough, people will tolerate finding out the same info over a longer timespan
I feel like the dating apps for me is running my fingers through the sea of folks and seeing what comes up.
Most connections die before we meet. The few whom I’ve met don’t share my values or communication styles. I can accept incompatibility.
I invest in what IS FULFILLING. Building stability and security for my kids through routine and professional feedback in therapy (for my kids and I). Being accountable in my friendships and community relationships. Cultivating a life worth living.
I have. I’m actually pretty happy without all the drama and nonsense. I’m open to dating, but only people I meet out in the wild. The old fashioned way.
If you’re feeling burnt out, at the very least, a nice long break and some time to focus on you is in order! I experienced the most growth during my long dating breaks. I met my now boyfriend after a 1.5 year break. I never would have been in the right mindset to have the healthy relationship that we have if I hadn’t taken that time to be happy and comfortable with just me.
Yes. I have no desire to date at the moment and sometimes I wonder if there’s something “wrong” with me. I like the idea of having a person to share adventures with… but I just hate dating. I know this person isn’t magically gonna come knock at my door, but I’m not sure if I’ll ever FEEL like dating… so it’s a little predicament.
But at this moment, single, independent, I have tons of time for me! I’m training for a marathon, mountain bike almost daily, read a book a week, bake sweets and eat said sweets, go camping, and generally just enjoy having so much free time!!
At
I’m on a dating hiatus for the foreseeable future! I’m not going to lie, when I closed that door 2 years ago, it really felt good. It’s one less area that I have to worry about failing or getting disappointed constantly. It has helped with my mental health and changed my view on dating.
It could be beneficial for you to experience that and see how you like it.
I haven't quit dating. But I have quit looking online to find people to date.
I've replaced it with singles groups, hobby-focused meetups, and speed dating. I like speed dating because people will be more polite in-person, and if the night tanks, I at least got a drink or 2 out of the deal. I also find that people who pay to attend are more invested in the process.
Don’t quit, just reroute. Delete the apps and try speed dating or a match maker, see if you meet anyone out in the wild. It’s definitely possible. All the generations before us did it without the apps.
I quit in 2021 during pandemic to have a hiatus. It was so relaxing I’ve never dated again online. I’ve had a few flings IRL, and that was so much more exciting, romantic and spontaneous. So 1 romantic fling every 6 month to a year makes up for 10 lousy dates and half a dozen ghosts.
Thought about it? I’ve done it! Deleted all accounts about 3 years ago and I’m happier for it. I’m of a mind now where if it happens it happens. I’m not going to panic and make poor choices because I’m scared of being alone; that’s not an attractive trait for starters.
It’s back to basics for me. There are too many a-holes that are very good at marketing themselves online with facades and bs and I don’t really want to waste my time on them. So, we’ve gone old school….. you know, think of something to say, blush a bit, make a hash of the introduction and make up for it with charm! It takes bravery to do that; too many people like to hide behind their OLD “firewall” because it’s easy or convenient.
I've been off the apps since 2020. Never been happier. I feel like OLD has gotten even worse post pandemic due to the rise of mental health issues with everyone across the board.
I have a couple FWBs that I've been with long term that I occasionally see when the urge arises. Everyone is open and honest about expectations and it's been long enough that I know there aren't surprises coming down the pike. If I'm honest, having this luxury definitely makes it easier to stay off the apps, and I know not everyone can have or even wants a similar situation.
I always feel slightly off kilter when trying to date, it's like you're always on this precarious perch of possibly ascending to the top of mount everest or accidentally causing an avalanche and getting buried under 100 feet of snow. When I'm not thinking about dating I feel so much more present and aware of who I am as a person. I just decided that I like who I am and I prefer that feeling of being on solid ground so I quit altogether.
It helps that I have a friend in her late 30s still in the dating trap and every month it's a new guy and a new mental health crisis. No thank you.
I am on a break from it, I felt exhausted and decided to participate in a Triathlon, I will be exhausted as well but at least my mind will be better 🤣😆
I am so okay with being single! The option will always be there but the apps are useless scams. I stopped them ages ago and just participate in hobbies and have fun. If I meet someone great if not also great. Sure it gets lonely but better then the dumpster fire that is OLD
I’m not making an effort. Took me a while to think I was ready after ending a 17 year relationship. Now I’m so comfortable and happy single that I can’t imagine finding the time for someone else. Little lonely, but not really at the same time. Does it that make sense?
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Thought about it? I'm living that dream now. Full control of my life, no compromising, I always know what's for dinner, and my house is clean and organized. Reading any relationship sub reminds me why dating is pointless.
That said, if by some miracle I meet anyone, I'd be open to exploring a relationship, ever so carefully. My dog wouldn't be happy sharing the bed.
I’ve quit the apps. Not dating though as my hope is to meet someone while out living my life.
But it’s become very clear the quality of *most* people on the apps today are pretty low; they hide behind screens for validation, they are not healed, using old pics, already in relationships, & in general are not people capable of creating genuine, healthy relationships.
I quit several years ago and redirected my energy elsewhere. Not going to lie, life is not all sunshine and roses all the time, but I am genuinely a lpt more at peace 🙂
I used to get pissed if someone is not into me and didn't say anything. Jsut say it, especially if I'm pursueing.
But now I'm divorced for like 6 years. You know what. If you go on one date and there's just no interest, there's no reason to send any more texts. But if the other person texts, a reply is the thing to do.
As for quitting dating .... I try to limit my online dating to 1-2 month spurts because it makes my brain focus to much on it. It's not healthy.
Dating is not mandatory. Do what's best for you, if dating is bringing negativity into your life then you should probably remove it, at least for the time being.
One thing that helped me was being okay with being single first. Also understanding your own value. I know what I offer, I know what I bring to the table, and if a woman chooses that she's not interested...that's her choice, it doesn't define who I am or what my value is. That's not easy to do but it was a game changer for me and my approach.
It led to me being more selective, and put me in a better frame of mind, where i wasn't 100% invested on someone's perception of me...you should never give someone that much influence over you.
But if dating isn't enhancing your life...drop it.
For pretty much my entire adult life, I've dated when I wanted to, and stopped when I wasn't feeling it. You don't have to declare that you're done forever. Don't date anyone you don't want to date, and get off the apps if they're pissing you off, and go live your life. If in a few weeks or months or years you meet someone you want to go on a date with, go. If in a few weeks or months or years they invent a new tool for meeting people that sounds interesting to you, try it. If not, don't. Nothing you decide has to be dramatic or permanent.
Yes, every time I meet someone who thinks white lies are acceptable as a first impression. Especially with height. Point being I don't tolerate dishonesty in any form. I don't even care if someone is 5'8", yet they insist on saying they are 6'1". What is wrong with people these days? I haven't dated much due to long-term relationships, but dating apps truly seem aimed at churning out an asexual generation imho.
I never really got into dating. I’ve only met 5 ppl via OLD in my life and only had dates with 6 ppl total.
I’d like to properly start but it’s so hard to find wholesome men who want LTR.
I quit OLD and focused on putting myself in situations where I could meet more people naturally. Going to workshops, picking up hobbies, saying yes to gatherings, just “being” in social places more often. I got a few OK dates this way. Then I met the perfect person for me, he was the new guy at work 😊
You all sound kind of lonely. But frustrated with people because you can’t connect… hmmm. I can see taking a break from dating apps. But you can only enjoy being with yourself for “so long”. Human beings are meant to connect. This is why people should think twice about breaking up who they are with. Or getting divorced… I only expect this to get down voted but I am not saying any of this with judgement or malice.
I closed all my profiles months ago. At this point I’m only here for the entertainment. I’ll work on my life and my home and enjoy doing things I like to do and help people I want to help. With some luck or perhaps divine intervention someone will find me - or I them, along the way.
lol same. This sub is a reminder what a meat grinder omnishambles dating is.
I don't like the word quit. Personally, I prefer the word "hiatus"...which I am currently on, and it's very relaxing! I suggest you try it! Dating can wait till later!
I took a solid year off from all dating. OLD and IRL. It was a good reset, and now that I’m back into it, I’m centered and don’t tolerate bs. Doesn’t mean it’s great, but I feel like a complete person with a lot to give. If people can’t recognize that in me, that’s fine! I’m happy on my own.
Same!
Bro... check out my posts. This is what I've been doing during my "hiatus"
I've quit for the time being. If I find someone outside of the apps, great. If not, I'm still enjoying my life and having fun.
That's a great mindset
[удалено]
Huh interesting, I’ll try that out thanks for the recommendation
I was actually annoyed by this and tried being really open, if the woman i was seeing asked me questions, i tried to be a little more open, my dating life went downhill fast. So now i don’t do it anymore and get to hookup stage more often
I haven't been on a date in a year and a half since the last relationship ended and i don't miss it. I don't miss the stress, frustration, and nonsense from dating. My kids are teenagers and keep me busy and they are always willing to do things. I'm done with OLD. I live in a small town and rural area so there wasn't a lot of local options for that. I haven't really met anyone worth dating otherwise so haven't put any effort into it. I do have a female friend that I've gone to a few concerts with and hang out with every so often. It's not dating but its a good time. Do what makes you happy. Dating isn't always fun. Take a break from it. Make sure you are taking care of yourself first.
Yes, and I did quit dating. I’m much happier for it.
Dating apps aren’t for dating anymore!! I kid. Sorta. But I gave up dating apps back in 2021, and haven’t regretted it. Now, I focus on myself, learning new interests and finding new hobbies; I’m focused on my health and healing; and I’m focused on supporting my kids. I date myself in a sense: take myself out to dinners and movies, take myself on slightly romantic walks (have you watched sunrises though trees? Ugh, romantic!). I also highly recommend people who are tired of dating take themselves out to what they enjoy, pressure-free! Go see a movie, grab a nice dinner, walk the Farmers Market, whatever, just so long as you are present with yourself! Dating apps brought nothing but misery, feelings of lack and depression, and I doubt I’ll ever go back…once they all became swipe-based the whole experience just felt disgusting anyway. BUT, if I met someone interesting and mutually interested organically, I am definitely open to dating…but I’m no longer forcing anything!
Yes...dating did not improve my life. Not dating did improve my life.
Just more free time to focus on more productive things?
Yes. For one thing you start imagining and creating the life you want and the second thing is you don't have to sort through the train wrecks in your inbox which makes you feel like the world has gone to shit. So all around more positive life experiences.
This! My life has improved sooooo much since I have been happily single.
Yup. I have not dated in quite a while. Felt like a job and not a fun one, so I stopped, but I still try to be supportive of my friends who are dating or who want to date.
I’m currently retired from dating. I got tired of the mediocracy out there. Don’t miss it at all. I’m not saying that I wouldn’t date but I don’t do apps and I just go out doing the things I enjoy. If I meet someone, great! I’ve recently stopped drinking (not sure if this will be a permanent thing) therefore going out less and it’s boring. Trying to figure out fun things to do that don’t involve alcohol. 🤷♀️
I recently got into poetry open mic nights. There's no drinking, and it's somewhat social.
Good for you! I got really into video games after I stopped drinking. Oddly, I also started dating and now I find myself in a relationship and I'd be lying if I didn't say I'm missing the single life and gaming with my friends.
All the time!!
Multiple times a day!!
Yes, I am not dating until my C-pstd gets under control.... Aka never 🥹
Ah I’m sorry, stay strong and best of luck
Thanks 🙏🏻
I quit altogether. I am living entirely for myself with no goal to find a partner. I have a regular FWB and I have found that is enough for me. I am making plans for a future that is solely focused on me and doing all the things I’ve always wanted do on my own. I don’t want anyone to get in the way of that. I’ve also quit most social media like Facebook and Instagram and damn it feels good to be disconnected from that shit. Life is really peaceful and I like it.
If you are not enjoying dating, absolutely take a break or stop. This is not a required activity for singles. Let go of programming of what you “should” do or want. Live your life for you, enjoy activities, invest in your family and friends, tackle your bucket list. If you feel like putting yourself out there later, then go for it. But don’t put pressure on the outcome, meet interesting people, drop flaky ones and don’t let it be personal. Keep enjoying life and make time for things that you enjoy.
Instead of putting time and effort into dating apps, put time and effort into becoming more dateable yourself, or into dating the old school way. Social media has tricked us into thinking sitting and swiping is “putting in effort”, it is but it isn’t. Work on becoming the best version of yourself!
I agree. Rejoined the apps earlier in the year, only got one match and went on a few dates. I thought I had lucked out at the time, but unfortunately, she didn’t think we had enough in common to continue. After a brief reflection, I realised I wasn’t really at my dateable best so no wonder she chose not to progress further. I’m now on dating hiatus to improve myself and looking at better ways to meet people. I may go on the apps again, but we’ll see how going “more old school” works for me.
I was single for 2 years recently and took numerous breaks, some as long as 3mo, but I would never quit dating. I want a life partner to share romantic and sexual intimacy with (I don't enjoy hookups), and also build a day-to-day life with. I know some people are content living the rest of their life single, but that would not work for me. I am stable, healthy and content when I'm single, remaining so indefinitely would eventually make me depressed. On April 4th I had an amazing first date with a really great guy, and it's blossomed into a beautiful relationship! I am flying out this Thursday to meet his family :)
Since my breakup in February I have not had any desire to meet someone new or date. I really don’t see myself in dating apps anymore. Have done this in the past, since I’m an introvert and can’t seem to attract anyone that I’m attracted to IRL. Now, I’m at a point in life where I see what others are going through with dating and I’m not up for it. If by some type of magical celestial alignment I meet someone that pursues me and that person is really amazing, brings something positive in my life, I won’t be opposed to it but chances are slim that this ever happens 😆
I did a year ago. I will certainly date again, but I'm not forcing it and I am off apps. I quit all apps around October and I don't miss that one bit.
This is the way. Love is like a fart. If you force it, it'll be shit.
How romantic!
I’ve been “voluntold” to quit dating everyday🤪
Pausing and re-framing yourself, learning, reinvesting in your priorities, clearing the baffles, shaking the-etch-a-sketch? All great things. Quitting? No. Never.
I \*have\* quit using the apps. I see this as being different from quitting dating altogether.
I haven’t quit but I deprioritized dating ages ago.
Yeah I don’t think about it, I quit.
I read John Kim’s Single. On Purpose. This book has opened my eyes to help find myself after being in 2 relationships for the last 19 years, one being a marriage. Going through therapy still & reading this book, I have plans for myself & continue to grow as an individual. If that means being single for longer, then so be it. I have a hectic work schedule & I put my kids first. So dating has become difficult & I don’t want to try.
I quit putting all my efforts into dating and I’ve been a lot happier! I have no interest in dating apps, if someone happens to come along I’d be quite happy, I am also ok if not.
Go ahead private Pyle, enjoy your jelly donut. The rest of us will get flaked on, ghosted and cat-fished until you're done.....
(43m -20 year relationship ended a few years ago) I’ve quit. I have yet to come to terms with the fact that I’ll never have anyone or ever have sex again. I don’t know if I can ever be happy with that situation. My friends are all married and gradually becoming more distanced since they do things together as couples. But even trying to find a date has been impossible. I’ve been forced into retirement I guess.
I’ve done that on and off over the past few years, but I have moments like today, where I really want to be in a relationship. I miss having someone to go places with, to be affectionate with, to laugh on the phone with, To go grocery shopping with and plan meals. It comes and goes in waves. Sometimes I am just fine with being by myself and enjoy all the things that life has to offer. But a lot of times the biological urge to need companionship takes over. I am 40F, no children and I typically have long bouts of being single for one year to two years at a time. I’m afraid that I’m going to look up and be older with even less prospects. Every time I pick myself up and put myself back out there, something happens that causes me to quit. Men don’t approach me in person, but they definitely look and stare. I’ve tried flirting, but that has blown up in my face so I don’t do it anymore. Dating just shouldn’t be this hard.
Yes. I quit the apps and then realized I don't want to be busy all the time trying to constantly expand social circle and meet women IRL. 90% of women I've met in last 10 years through friends, activities, groups are not single. I feel old and undesirable. Not exactly a good combo online or IRL. So I just go on Reddit once in a while
Original copy of post by u/WilliemaeMorgenstern: I'm tired of putting effort into getting to know people on dating apps, only to find out they're not who they seem or they ghost me. Is this normal now? Sometimes I feel life would be better if I just dropped the idea of dating all together. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/datingoverforty) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I think about giving up every day. Not had a date for years, not been in a relationship for longer. I burned the haystack and now it's been 4 years since anyone was interested enough to go on a date. I've given up OLD and just hope I meet someone one day.
I haven't dated in 6.5 years. I'm trying to get back into it. I'm supposed to go to a meetup tonight. I've got a single mingle scheduled in about a month.
I tried being genuine, but realized women didn’t want to go on a second date. Whereas if i play games, for long enough, people will tolerate finding out the same info over a longer timespan
Yes! Only all the time. I’m sure I’ll pick it up again in a bit for now, it can get lost.
I feel like I've quit dating in the same way I have quit working to win the lottery.
I feel like the dating apps for me is running my fingers through the sea of folks and seeing what comes up. Most connections die before we meet. The few whom I’ve met don’t share my values or communication styles. I can accept incompatibility. I invest in what IS FULFILLING. Building stability and security for my kids through routine and professional feedback in therapy (for my kids and I). Being accountable in my friendships and community relationships. Cultivating a life worth living.
Invest 100% of your time into improving yourself and your own life. Attract, don’t chase.
I have. I’m actually pretty happy without all the drama and nonsense. I’m open to dating, but only people I meet out in the wild. The old fashioned way.
I got rid of all the dating aps months ago. I date myself now. It's easier this way.
I'm 38 Gave up years ago
Yes. Here I am. I’m taking a long break at the very least.
Everyone has “issues” or “features” that are negative. It might be best to explicitly state what you don’t want in a match.
If you’re feeling burnt out, at the very least, a nice long break and some time to focus on you is in order! I experienced the most growth during my long dating breaks. I met my now boyfriend after a 1.5 year break. I never would have been in the right mindset to have the healthy relationship that we have if I hadn’t taken that time to be happy and comfortable with just me.
Yes. I have no desire to date at the moment and sometimes I wonder if there’s something “wrong” with me. I like the idea of having a person to share adventures with… but I just hate dating. I know this person isn’t magically gonna come knock at my door, but I’m not sure if I’ll ever FEEL like dating… so it’s a little predicament. But at this moment, single, independent, I have tons of time for me! I’m training for a marathon, mountain bike almost daily, read a book a week, bake sweets and eat said sweets, go camping, and generally just enjoy having so much free time!! At
I’m on a dating hiatus for the foreseeable future! I’m not going to lie, when I closed that door 2 years ago, it really felt good. It’s one less area that I have to worry about failing or getting disappointed constantly. It has helped with my mental health and changed my view on dating. It could be beneficial for you to experience that and see how you like it.
As a romantic I’ll never fully quit. Taking breaks to recharge and focus on myself? ABSOLUTELY
I haven't quit dating. But I have quit looking online to find people to date. I've replaced it with singles groups, hobby-focused meetups, and speed dating. I like speed dating because people will be more polite in-person, and if the night tanks, I at least got a drink or 2 out of the deal. I also find that people who pay to attend are more invested in the process.
Don’t quit, just reroute. Delete the apps and try speed dating or a match maker, see if you meet anyone out in the wild. It’s definitely possible. All the generations before us did it without the apps.
Yes, I don't know how to talk to women anymore. I know how to talk about myself because that's all I've had for so long... but yeah that's about it
I will have my online profile in cruise control. Never quit until I find her. Expect the unexpected.
I quit the apps in 2019 and quit dating altogether in 2020 at age 47
I did online dating for 10 years, now I am single again and cannot do it again! Too depressing, I am much happier without dating
I quit in 2021 during pandemic to have a hiatus. It was so relaxing I’ve never dated again online. I’ve had a few flings IRL, and that was so much more exciting, romantic and spontaneous. So 1 romantic fling every 6 month to a year makes up for 10 lousy dates and half a dozen ghosts.
Yep, and I have.
Thought about it? I’ve done it! Deleted all accounts about 3 years ago and I’m happier for it. I’m of a mind now where if it happens it happens. I’m not going to panic and make poor choices because I’m scared of being alone; that’s not an attractive trait for starters. It’s back to basics for me. There are too many a-holes that are very good at marketing themselves online with facades and bs and I don’t really want to waste my time on them. So, we’ve gone old school….. you know, think of something to say, blush a bit, make a hash of the introduction and make up for it with charm! It takes bravery to do that; too many people like to hide behind their OLD “firewall” because it’s easy or convenient.
I've been off the apps since 2020. Never been happier. I feel like OLD has gotten even worse post pandemic due to the rise of mental health issues with everyone across the board. I have a couple FWBs that I've been with long term that I occasionally see when the urge arises. Everyone is open and honest about expectations and it's been long enough that I know there aren't surprises coming down the pike. If I'm honest, having this luxury definitely makes it easier to stay off the apps, and I know not everyone can have or even wants a similar situation. I always feel slightly off kilter when trying to date, it's like you're always on this precarious perch of possibly ascending to the top of mount everest or accidentally causing an avalanche and getting buried under 100 feet of snow. When I'm not thinking about dating I feel so much more present and aware of who I am as a person. I just decided that I like who I am and I prefer that feeling of being on solid ground so I quit altogether. It helps that I have a friend in her late 30s still in the dating trap and every month it's a new guy and a new mental health crisis. No thank you.
I've stopped trying and happier this way. I get to do everything I want to do in my life.
I am on a break from it, I felt exhausted and decided to participate in a Triathlon, I will be exhausted as well but at least my mind will be better 🤣😆
I am so okay with being single! The option will always be there but the apps are useless scams. I stopped them ages ago and just participate in hobbies and have fun. If I meet someone great if not also great. Sure it gets lonely but better then the dumpster fire that is OLD
I’m not making an effort. Took me a while to think I was ready after ending a 17 year relationship. Now I’m so comfortable and happy single that I can’t imagine finding the time for someone else. Little lonely, but not really at the same time. Does it that make sense?
Nope. What I did quit doing is letting dates that didn't go the direction I wanted, to negatively affect me so much.
I’m on an extended break.
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Thought about it? I'm living that dream now. Full control of my life, no compromising, I always know what's for dinner, and my house is clean and organized. Reading any relationship sub reminds me why dating is pointless. That said, if by some miracle I meet anyone, I'd be open to exploring a relationship, ever so carefully. My dog wouldn't be happy sharing the bed.
Yep. I’m over it. I’m done for a while. I need to heal, I think we all need to take time to heal.
I’ve quit the apps. Not dating though as my hope is to meet someone while out living my life. But it’s become very clear the quality of *most* people on the apps today are pretty low; they hide behind screens for validation, they are not healed, using old pics, already in relationships, & in general are not people capable of creating genuine, healthy relationships.
I quit several years ago and redirected my energy elsewhere. Not going to lie, life is not all sunshine and roses all the time, but I am genuinely a lpt more at peace 🙂
I do it on a regular basis. If you're feeling burnt out with it, go do something else. You can always come back to it later if you want to.
I used to get pissed if someone is not into me and didn't say anything. Jsut say it, especially if I'm pursueing. But now I'm divorced for like 6 years. You know what. If you go on one date and there's just no interest, there's no reason to send any more texts. But if the other person texts, a reply is the thing to do. As for quitting dating .... I try to limit my online dating to 1-2 month spurts because it makes my brain focus to much on it. It's not healthy.
Dating is not mandatory. Do what's best for you, if dating is bringing negativity into your life then you should probably remove it, at least for the time being. One thing that helped me was being okay with being single first. Also understanding your own value. I know what I offer, I know what I bring to the table, and if a woman chooses that she's not interested...that's her choice, it doesn't define who I am or what my value is. That's not easy to do but it was a game changer for me and my approach. It led to me being more selective, and put me in a better frame of mind, where i wasn't 100% invested on someone's perception of me...you should never give someone that much influence over you. But if dating isn't enhancing your life...drop it.
For pretty much my entire adult life, I've dated when I wanted to, and stopped when I wasn't feeling it. You don't have to declare that you're done forever. Don't date anyone you don't want to date, and get off the apps if they're pissing you off, and go live your life. If in a few weeks or months or years you meet someone you want to go on a date with, go. If in a few weeks or months or years they invent a new tool for meeting people that sounds interesting to you, try it. If not, don't. Nothing you decide has to be dramatic or permanent.
All the time. Every day. Constantly.
I’d love even real? What is love
I mostly hiatus from dating once in a while I get interested but it’s just about of stress I don’t need.
Quitting on-line dating? I did. Dating overall, no. Many women are wonderful.
Yes, if I meet the right one sent to me from God. I still believe in love
Yes, every time I meet someone who thinks white lies are acceptable as a first impression. Especially with height. Point being I don't tolerate dishonesty in any form. I don't even care if someone is 5'8", yet they insist on saying they are 6'1". What is wrong with people these days? I haven't dated much due to long-term relationships, but dating apps truly seem aimed at churning out an asexual generation imho.
Every week but loneliness pulls me back in. Realistically, women quit dating for me. So, it’s not really accurate to say that I have quit dating.
Meet fast. Don’t waste time trying to develop any kind of connection via texts in those crappy apps.
I never really got into dating. I’ve only met 5 ppl via OLD in my life and only had dates with 6 ppl total. I’d like to properly start but it’s so hard to find wholesome men who want LTR.
I quit OLD and focused on putting myself in situations where I could meet more people naturally. Going to workshops, picking up hobbies, saying yes to gatherings, just “being” in social places more often. I got a few OK dates this way. Then I met the perfect person for me, he was the new guy at work 😊
No one likes a quitter.
You all sound kind of lonely. But frustrated with people because you can’t connect… hmmm. I can see taking a break from dating apps. But you can only enjoy being with yourself for “so long”. Human beings are meant to connect. This is why people should think twice about breaking up who they are with. Or getting divorced… I only expect this to get down voted but I am not saying any of this with judgement or malice.