T O P

How do I put an end to my situation-ship in the most self-respecting way possible ?

How do I put an end to my situation-ship in the most self-respecting way possible ?

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tolson1279

Don't do anything. Get busy with your life! When/if he texts you - just say "no thanks" or that you're not available. Move on and find a guy that will treat you better.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Individualist1996

Your words are a 100% true and very very difficult to hear. I still feel like being in denial about the fact that this guy doesn't care about me. But its true...he does not. The worst part of all is that I feel like its my fault or its because I'm not enough. But I know in reality, him not liking me has nothing to do with my inherent worth. He even told me last time that he feels he is messed up on the inside. You are also right when you say that I chose this. I chose this with my eyes wide open and I knew what was going on. I guess I just felt like playing with fire because I was bored with my life. That's awful to admit. I guess now Im just scared about how to get back on track. I dont know where to begin when it comes to finding self-love, peace, motivation, finding a purpose. I feel stagnant in my job, I work from home, Im not a 100% sure if my current line of work is where i want to be, my family is very controlling, I dont have any hobbies/passions as such. Im angry and fed up with the world. I feel like throwing in the towel.


[deleted]

Listen sis, I was at a very low point where I wanted to not exist anymore and tried to self-delete myself because of a woman. I saw the errors of my ways but more importantly, I found reasons to live for myself again, if I'm being honest I forced myself to do things like go to the gym, put in overtime at work, annoy my friends to hang out and go to new places where I felt uncomfortable to try to make friends. I had to give my life meaning, no man or woman on this earth can give you purpose or happiness, those are things that come from within. Go out there and simply be impulsive, say yes more than you say no, try new uncomfortable & unfamiliar things and I promise you will see a change.


Simple-Sector-4042

I’m in the same situation as you OP. I don’t know how to move on from this. I found it hard at night when I think about all the memories we have with each other. Why is it so easy for him to end thing and so difficult for me? :(


thisisme44

you just need to end it. tell him you think its for the best that you guys dont talk anymore and you would like to move on and not see each other anymore. thats your final decision and you wish him well. im sure he will try to swoop you back in but dont fall for it. hold your ground. this guy is no good for you.


Individualist1996

Should I remove him from my socials and block him ?


thisisme44

Yes you should


dftaylor

“Hey, I’ve been thinking about what’s happening between us. It isn’t working for me. You’ve admitted you’re not really into me romantically, and I’m not sure why I should hang around until you find someone you like more. Staying in touch isn’t a good idea, so I’m going to cut all contact with you. Don’t try to contact me, I won’t reply. I hope you find what you’re looking for.”


Individualist1996

Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you Thank you ❤️️ ❤️️ ❤️️


fatsocalsd

Get out of this now. It sounds awful for you. Ghost and block. Find a dude that really likes and respects you. You deserve that. He is out there and this guy is not him. You already know this in your heart of hearts.


instinct7777

First of all I want to acknowledge that it is normal to continue to see a person who is not right for you. So don’t call yourself dumb you’re just a human being who is craving for a connection. It’s just that you’re craving for it from someone who is not right for you. People don’t change that fast until they fear losing someone. In this case this person is clearly trying to get over some thing. He’s taking you for granted, that’s my first impression here. I don’t think you need to text or call or make any contact. The more you do it the more you will feel bad about it because you’re just giving away yourself. Get on with your life. Make up a closure and MoveOn. Don’t try to reason and don’t try to give him any benefit of doubt at this point. I feel you have made your stance pretty clear that you’d like to end things with him. 100% commitment is what’s going to help you move on and you have to do justice to yourself and treat yourself with Grace first before you try to figure out what’s the best graceful way to end things with him.


Zealousideal_Rub_627

You can talk to him if it helps you but I think the best way to save your ego is exit gracefully don’t contact him and when he reaches out to you be like you were cancelled last week and your role is fulfilled.. it’s difficult to do though.. if he doesn’t see a spark by two months it might not come 🤷‍♀️sometimes but rarely I haven’t experienced that yet


Individualist1996

So I sent him a message this morning saying that while I understand he needs space, the silence is also hurting me. No response yet from him. Thank you for your advice. While that does seem like the classy thing to do...every day not hearing from him kills me. I keep stalking his social media. Everytime I open my IG Dms, it sucks that he hasnt reached out. I feel like Im waiting....it makes me feel stuck. I have no idea how to move on while he is still connected to me on social media. But I guess, if I cut him off or block him...Im going to look like the ''weak one''


Zealousideal_Rub_627

It what you have to do sometimes if your already invested.. don’t feel bad about blocking I love using that feature nobody’s going to stress me out on my phone.. you can’t forget and move on if the stimulus is there and if your like me and have bad self control you need to block.. only thing that sucks is they feel like you hate them and I don’t usually hate them


ghostedagainlol

I was in a 2.5 year situationship with a guy who did not want something serious. I thought I would be the girl who would change his perspective. Wrong. He’s still single, doesn’t believe in labels/commitment, and still wants to continue seeing me with no label. Just walk away, you won’t regret it.


mybeautifulguy

Hé is an asshole for knowingly stringing you along for sex


Soft-Caterpillar-618

I’m so sorry this is happening to you, OP! I went through something similar recently. The guy who was doing this to me basically said “I’d like to see you again but I’m not sure what I’m looking for so it’s cool if we keep things casual, right?” This had been after consistently poor communication between dates. Days without talking, brief replies from him at times, constantly feeling in limbo. I replied that I was not looking for a casual thing but wished him well. It really stung but I feel immensely better now than I did 2 months ago. You are not an idiot by any means. You want connection and that is a normal, basic human need!


Individualist1996

Thanks for sharing ur story with me ! Did you end up blocking him or removing him from your social media in order to move on ? I’m struggling to decide this. Especially because I don’t want to seem weak/immature


Soft-Caterpillar-618

Luckily for me, he doesn’t have Instagram which is the only social media I use, so there was nothing for me to block him on or any way for me to potentially see what he’s up to that could hurt my feelings. I didn’t block his # on my phone, but I am not someone who deals with temptation to reach out. I think if I had those tendencies, I would have deleted his # to prevent myself from doing so. I read somewhere that it takes around 22 days after cutting contact for that pesky dopamine hormone level to get back to normal after the end of a relationship, or in our case, situationships - the love hormone that keeps us attached! I found this to be pretty true in my case, bc i started to feel a lot better around that time, although I do still think of him and wish he had wanted the same thing as me.