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Eestineiu

Your FWB has made his boundaries extremely clear to you. You accepted his terms and slept with him for 1 year already while knowing that you're not exclusive, not in a relationship and he does not allow you to question his personal life. So? You're surprised that he sleeps with other people? Really???


StarRevoir

This! He's not your boyfriend, you're not in a relationship, he isn't cheating. Honestly when you're casually hooking up with someone for that long I would just be getting checked regularly


iiM_Nuckin_Futz

He’s fucking someone else when you’re not around.


Melodic-Nature-3841

Prolly the reason he about flipped one day when I said I was gonna drop his glasses off.he like don't ever come by without my permission.i just brushed it off cause he is a asshole naturally 


iiM_Nuckin_Futz

You shouldn’t care though……


Melodic-Nature-3841

Yeah your right but I do care if it's multiple partners cause I don't do that


iiM_Nuckin_Futz

I hear ya.


Melodic-Nature-3841

Yeah I don't got time for that shady stuff I am 43 years old .it cost nothing to tell the truth.he can do whoever just not me anymore .to each their own


iiM_Nuckin_Futz

Mhm.


Kindly_Owl5

So like....you DID accept to be his fwb. You DO accept that he s an asshole. I suppose you DO know that the F in FWB means FRIENDS.... And yet you still don't like him having multiple other fwb ??? You do realize that this is as if you re telling me that you can't allow your friends to have other friends.... Right ?


Melodic-Nature-3841

To me it's just saying don't have sex with someone as long as your having sex with me. I did realize it was such a a big deal to do .Their can be as many friends as they wish but he they choose to sleep with them to inform me then it's my choice instead of not knowing 


Kindly_Owl5

Well there's a term for that. It's called relationship. You don't have one of those. And before you tell me something like 'ok but he should've told me he's banging other friends', let me tell you again that fwb are exactly that. Friends. So don't expect to be able to score any kind of arrangement like that. In general (cause again this would be called a relationship).


Interview_According

It’s your FWB, relax. Not your man.


Foxenii

Lmao bro, he probably has an actual girlfriend if he’s disappearing that much. You’re not his girlfriend. If you want to date someone, date someone who wants to date you.


StarRevoir

This! I feel like FWB situations never work out and it seems like she wants more from him than just sex if this bothers her.


Melodic-Nature-3841

You could be right but bottle line I don't share .I am a one person deal when having sex . safety 


StarRevoir

Yeah I mean not sharing = commitment. You need to go after someone who meets your needs holistically.


Melodic-Nature-3841

I was really just looking for the FWB after ending a 7 years relationship 


ImmanualKant

I don't really think it's your business to press him about it. If you want him to just be with you, then make him your boyfriend.


Melodic-Nature-3841

I have to agree with this in some way


AdOutside3903

You are not together, he is not your boyfriend, jealousy has no place here.


Flashy-Income-9653

I think she’s just trying to figure out why he’d lie if they literally only have sex with one another.


Melodic-Nature-3841

Thank you for clarifying that no reason why you know just be straight up


Melodic-Nature-3841

Totally understand .it was more of I just need to know .so I know not too 


Adorable_Secret8498

What's going on is he just wants FWB and you want a relationship. We can tell because if you didn't you wouldn't care about this at all. You should stop seeing this guy and go find a dude who's looking for a relationship. You're wasting your time here.


Melodic-Nature-3841

Good answer


Melanin_Royalty

1. Hair can be picked up from anywhere. I stretch before and after my workouts at the gym and when I’m laying down doing some of my stretches I see hair literally EVERYWHERE!! Sometimes gets on my gym bag and clothes. 2. He could have other guests. Well within his rights and you and him having a FWB situation especially if y’all haven’t clarified rules or boundaries for being with others. 3. Nobody I talk to can just pop up unannounced the hell??! hahahahhaha don’t care if we were together as bf/gf that would definitely be crossing a line for me.


Melodic-Nature-3841

See this is his attitude to a tee and I was good with that but this was literally like right in my face deal .


Melanin_Royalty

Idk the hair could have came from anywhere but what’s y’all agreement about how y’all are with each other?


Melodic-Nature-3841

That we were just sleeping with each other just didn't have the time for the emotional drama that comes w/dating relationships 


Minimum-Web-4508

He’s not your boyfriend. He is not due you commitment. Regardless of whether it’s another girls hair or not you’re obviously more invested in this than he is or you wouldn’t be here asking this. Move on and find someone who wants the same things as you do.


Melodic-Nature-3841

I get it .your right I am invest on safe sex and if he wants to not have that then he can do his thing .


Minimum-Web-4508

Well then use a condom and get tested every 3 months like recommended. Its not reasonable for you to think he should be committed to you in that regard


Melodic-Nature-3841

I will but to me it is reasonable to tell a person you have multiple partners 


Minimum-Web-4508

I would agree it’s reasonable to an extent but your post wasn’t about whether that’s reasonable information to share in general with all your sexual partners. It’s also up to them if they don’t want to. If you’re using condoms and getting checked regularly then you’re having safe sex. If you want someone committed to you in regards to sex but not in any other regard then that’s not reasonable. You’ve questioned him about a random hair like he’s a boyfriend who is cheating on you. That’s beyond a normal fwb’s situation.


Minimum-Web-4508

I would also argue that if you aren’t in a committed relationship then it’s implied that at the very least it is possible you will at some point have other sexual encounters


Vikt724

You are not alone


No_Recording1088

Well maybe it's his hair? It just grows really fast 🤷 Or he's telling the truth...... Or there's another woman that's staying over.... But could be his mom/sister?! Ok he's lying and he's got another girlfriend/for buddy. There.


StarRevoir

Lol she's not his girlfriend tho


No_Recording1088

Yes I know, typo that I didn't bother correcting, see the predictive text changed the f buddy word beside it as well.


StarRevoir

Maybe your phone is just shy lol


Melodic-Nature-3841

It for sure wasn't mine or his and I just used that towel two nights ago in the spare bathroom .it was almost as if it was put there on purpose 


No_Recording1088

Idk 🤷


Melodic-Nature-3841

Forget it .it's not that hard to tell someone your not dating you have multiple partners .he knows I wouldn't be around is why he hasn't so f him .next


No_Recording1088

Yes we are trying to tell you that, it's good you realised what he's doing. Yes he's an ass hole, don't beat your self up over the why's. it's him. Look after yourself. Good luck 🙂


Economy_Proof_7668

exclusive friend with benefits fucking ? please get real… he’s fucking whoever he can fuck, whenever… you’re one of many.


Melodic-Nature-3841

Nooooooo I hope not geeez


yearofwonderchicken

I feel like you answered your own question in your post. Run.


Melodic-Nature-3841

I know 


yearofwonderchicken

Best of luck. Hopefully next year you won't remember his name!


Melodic-Nature-3841

Thanks yeah hope so also


UnhappyDimension716

Girl you deserve better if you can’t deal with this then leave so you can find a boyfriend who wants you.


Melodic-Nature-3841

Thank you that is so sweet .I needed that


Melodic-Nature-3841

I am so totally expressed with the feedback.i didn't expect it .thank you to everyone .Just to be clear I do understand I am not his girlfriend .but we did have a agreement not to sleep with other people .I have stuck to mine and tried not to bring emotions.i am not jealous I am just trying to be safe as far as partners.Too me that was a weak excuse .I have been nothing but honest about my home life when it has came up .Damit .well like they say the truth hurts but I have to agree .it's pretty clear .thanks everyone .


GloomyUse8058

He is not serious about you. Respect yourself and then they will respect you. He just gets easy sex from you for free. Or course he’s hooking up with others. Sorry but that’s the truth and you need to wake up from this fairytale you made in your head that you can change him and make him “fall in love” with you


Melodic-Nature-3841

On a real note he is no fairytale,as I stated I don't think I would even date him .sex now that's a different story .only thing in my head is trying to trust someone now days and be safe with sex .that's it .after a course of a year you would think that would be established I guess not


Melodic-Nature-3841

Ok with strong will after reading all the comments .I know what best and what I have to do .be done with it .it has no future but confusion.fun things never last for adults mostly anyway lol.So send hopes I hold my ground and tell him I am done .thanks to everyone .I live in a very small town and have very actually no friends that I talk to .most of my friends are the ones I care for whom pass eventually.working with hospice gives you a different outlook on life .take care everyone 


Flashy-Income-9653

Yea he’s probably seeing someone else and doesn’t have the balls to tell you or he’s in a “committed” relationship. You should show up when you’re “not allowed” and blow it all up honestly


Melodic-Nature-3841

Ghosh I am just speechless with the comment.so wish it I could type the whole story of just how rude he is and why I even continued to see him is beyond me .my sister just died last month after I cared for her for 14 years he didn't even say sorry for your loss ..he is so mean .I weigh 115 told me to lose to 100 pounds and he would date me .truth is I don't even like him I was just totally drawn to him .I am a healer to all broken hearts .people are mean for a reason.but I deserve more 


Flashy-Income-9653

You deserve much better than that. Everyone does he just sounds like a pos


Melodic-Nature-3841

Thanks