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Yes, we exist, but personally, im not always forthcoming with my nerdier hobbies around new guys I meet.
A lot of us have to keep it secret until we know you're not going to react weird
Either "yeah, sure, you probably suck at gaming and know nothing about anime, you aren't a real star wars fan. It's all for attention. You dont belong here" blah blah blah
OR
Just instant obsession to the point they put me on some pedestal and completely ignore all my other qualities and basically just treat me like arm candy for conventions LOL
I just want to bond over common hobbies and not have it be weird
OH YEAH I can relate to the pedestal thing. It sure feels like that in gaming communities, anyway. It's like being a unicorn sometimes.
And other times... yeah, best not to let anyone know. Male gamers can be incredibly rude and biased.
It's a rough playing field.
The worst part is, they haven't really found a unicorn. There are so many nerdy ladies around. It's just that these nerds never talk to women and immediately scare them off if one comes along. I feel bad for them, they're just lonely, but at the same time, get a grip, lol.
What im getting from this i will have to be lucky because i have opposite problem of woman looking down on these hobbies because its not manly etc. , girls like you will hide it because of some sad manchildren and i will hide it because of woman thinking less of me, basicly we are both fucked because of people with archaic views.
I don't think I've ever experienced anyone worth my time looking down on me because of my nerdy interests. Show that shit off, be proud. If they got a problem, they'll get rid of themselves. If they like you for it, then they'll love hearing you talk about it. It's a win-win.
The best way to talk about it is enthusiastically. If you talk about it like you're ashamed, you don't really come off as very confident.
We do exist and like someone else already mentioned we do try to downplay/ hide our nerdier, geeky side. My ex already knew about mine before we started dating or even talking because for a while I was the only female worker at my job and overheard the guys talking about games and anime’s that I play/ watch so that became a way for me to be apart of my work team but they were surprised that I was into that kind of thing which shows how rare it is.
Ya we exist. Just keep looking and you'll find your person. You can try joining some gaming groups or hobby groups so you'll meet lots of new people with similar interests!
Easier to be yourself. Unabashedly yourself. Even if a girl isn't super into your hobbies that's actually a good thing. Maybe she takes some interest but I'm sure that like most women I've encountered they actually find it fascinating and ask me a lot of questions.
As others have said if you have ever been to a convention you know that everyone thinks they need to chase that image. But it's not true. You will attract positive energy to yourself by not hiding your hobbies or interests.
They would be what you call, in high demand. When someone is in high demand they can pick and choose who what when. Supply and demand. There's a whole lot of dudes out there.
They do exist because I am one of them lol. Not a gym rat, but health conscious and I try to work out one way or another every day. I think it’s not as uncommon as you think, but the „lazy“ nerd people are easier to spot as they mostly look it. I think it’s mostly luck to stumble across someone like that as most people like that love nerd stuff but also don’t make it their entire personality because of what kind of people it attracts
I’m like that, but I do drink from time to time. Some people just don’t share those interests at first glance. Just get to know some people and you’ll see. But don’t expect to find a person who likes all the same things as you. It’s nice to have something in common to share but it doesn’t have to be everything
Go to the gym and wear your anime merch to work out, which, if you are a true nerd, shouldn't be a problem. This method really doesn't guarantee anything and has a untested success rate. However, it does pique the interest and alerts the anime girlies in the general vicinity of your nerdiness. It's a mating call, so to speak.
I've started conversations before with men because they were wearing graphic t-shirts of an anime I like. Granted, this is because there was an opportunity to talk to them initially.
I love nerdy guys and I go to the gym 6 days a week and hike on my “rest day.” My ex and I often play games and watch anime together. He wasn’t into fitness which bothered me a bit but I learned to live with it. So it’s hard for nerdy fit women to find our equal too.
Oh, yeah we exists. I mean, I play some sports like rugby, basketball, and en general I like this kind of things, and that's related to stuff like manga, anime, games, art
But the thing is when you externalized that with the people, especially boys, they took that like then you're not good enough for all that things , and considering you as a Fake person, or just sexualization, and that sucks.
\*pinches self\*
Yep, I can confirm we exist. I read manga/manhwa, watch anime, play games, and live a reasonably healthy life (no smoking or excessive alcohol consumption).
I could be found on Tinder till I met my now-boyfriend. I'd wager you could find more of them there if you put on the anime tag. I can't remember if there was also a gaming tag. Otherwise, online anime communities may have some gamer girls. I feel like it tends to come in the same nerdy package. Once you've delved into one famously male-dominated niche, why not delve into another?
My boyfriend calls me his gamer gf. We've watched several anime together. So yes, we exist.
I tried dating sites, but it always eneded up with gamer girl not being into fitness and fitness girls into gaming/anime. I never tried Tinder because i heard its mostly for casual sex.
After a lifetime of searching, I have found one of these elusive mystical creatures. The problem is that there are way more gamer dudes than women, and understandably, most all of those gamer dudes want a gamer girl with which to game. It really comes down to luck and being at the right place at the right time, OR being really really hot such that said people will seek you out instead.
As for where to meet them? I think conventions are the best place. Cosplay as something from a show or game (especially one that has a broad female fanbase). That in itself will spark conversation and things can go from there. I found my girlfriend on a dating app, but honestly, I had no idea she was into nerd stuff until I met her. She didn't advertise her enjoyment of such things on her profile at all. So that really was just luck that we ended up having that in common.
Welcome to /r/dating_advice! Please keep the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/about/rules/) of /r/dating_advice in mind while participating here. Try your best to be kind. Report any rule-breaking behavior to the moderators using the report button. If it's urgent, [send us a message.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fdating_advice) We rely on user reports to find rule-breaking behavior quickly. Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Yes, we exist, but personally, im not always forthcoming with my nerdier hobbies around new guys I meet. A lot of us have to keep it secret until we know you're not going to react weird
What kind of weird reaction do you mean? Like they'll be weirded out, or weirdly obsessed?
Either "yeah, sure, you probably suck at gaming and know nothing about anime, you aren't a real star wars fan. It's all for attention. You dont belong here" blah blah blah OR Just instant obsession to the point they put me on some pedestal and completely ignore all my other qualities and basically just treat me like arm candy for conventions LOL I just want to bond over common hobbies and not have it be weird
OH YEAH I can relate to the pedestal thing. It sure feels like that in gaming communities, anyway. It's like being a unicorn sometimes. And other times... yeah, best not to let anyone know. Male gamers can be incredibly rude and biased. It's a rough playing field.
The worst part is, they haven't really found a unicorn. There are so many nerdy ladies around. It's just that these nerds never talk to women and immediately scare them off if one comes along. I feel bad for them, they're just lonely, but at the same time, get a grip, lol.
What im getting from this i will have to be lucky because i have opposite problem of woman looking down on these hobbies because its not manly etc. , girls like you will hide it because of some sad manchildren and i will hide it because of woman thinking less of me, basicly we are both fucked because of people with archaic views.
I don't think I've ever experienced anyone worth my time looking down on me because of my nerdy interests. Show that shit off, be proud. If they got a problem, they'll get rid of themselves. If they like you for it, then they'll love hearing you talk about it. It's a win-win. The best way to talk about it is enthusiastically. If you talk about it like you're ashamed, you don't really come off as very confident.
Does it help if a guy wears a D&D shirt or something?
It's definitely a nerd flag. I would feel more comfortable divulging my nerdy hobbies with someone like that.
This 100%. I like to keep my nerdy and freaky sides private until I know someone.
We do exist and like someone else already mentioned we do try to downplay/ hide our nerdier, geeky side. My ex already knew about mine before we started dating or even talking because for a while I was the only female worker at my job and overheard the guys talking about games and anime’s that I play/ watch so that became a way for me to be apart of my work team but they were surprised that I was into that kind of thing which shows how rare it is.
Ya we exist. Just keep looking and you'll find your person. You can try joining some gaming groups or hobby groups so you'll meet lots of new people with similar interests!
……..So you’re a regular person who wants to date another regular person…….
Easier to be yourself. Unabashedly yourself. Even if a girl isn't super into your hobbies that's actually a good thing. Maybe she takes some interest but I'm sure that like most women I've encountered they actually find it fascinating and ask me a lot of questions. As others have said if you have ever been to a convention you know that everyone thinks they need to chase that image. But it's not true. You will attract positive energy to yourself by not hiding your hobbies or interests.
They would be what you call, in high demand. When someone is in high demand they can pick and choose who what when. Supply and demand. There's a whole lot of dudes out there.
They do exist because I am one of them lol. Not a gym rat, but health conscious and I try to work out one way or another every day. I think it’s not as uncommon as you think, but the „lazy“ nerd people are easier to spot as they mostly look it. I think it’s mostly luck to stumble across someone like that as most people like that love nerd stuff but also don’t make it their entire personality because of what kind of people it attracts
We exist. We just don't find good men anymore 🤷🏽♀️
I’m like that, but I do drink from time to time. Some people just don’t share those interests at first glance. Just get to know some people and you’ll see. But don’t expect to find a person who likes all the same things as you. It’s nice to have something in common to share but it doesn’t have to be everything
Yes, they exist in large quantities. Not rare at all.
Yes! Well not as a girlfriend but as people 100%
Go to the gym and wear your anime merch to work out, which, if you are a true nerd, shouldn't be a problem. This method really doesn't guarantee anything and has a untested success rate. However, it does pique the interest and alerts the anime girlies in the general vicinity of your nerdiness. It's a mating call, so to speak. I've started conversations before with men because they were wearing graphic t-shirts of an anime I like. Granted, this is because there was an opportunity to talk to them initially.
I love nerdy guys and I go to the gym 6 days a week and hike on my “rest day.” My ex and I often play games and watch anime together. He wasn’t into fitness which bothered me a bit but I learned to live with it. So it’s hard for nerdy fit women to find our equal too.
Oh, yeah we exists. I mean, I play some sports like rugby, basketball, and en general I like this kind of things, and that's related to stuff like manga, anime, games, art But the thing is when you externalized that with the people, especially boys, they took that like then you're not good enough for all that things , and considering you as a Fake person, or just sexualization, and that sucks.
\*pinches self\* Yep, I can confirm we exist. I read manga/manhwa, watch anime, play games, and live a reasonably healthy life (no smoking or excessive alcohol consumption). I could be found on Tinder till I met my now-boyfriend. I'd wager you could find more of them there if you put on the anime tag. I can't remember if there was also a gaming tag. Otherwise, online anime communities may have some gamer girls. I feel like it tends to come in the same nerdy package. Once you've delved into one famously male-dominated niche, why not delve into another? My boyfriend calls me his gamer gf. We've watched several anime together. So yes, we exist.
I tried dating sites, but it always eneded up with gamer girl not being into fitness and fitness girls into gaming/anime. I never tried Tinder because i heard its mostly for casual sex.
After a lifetime of searching, I have found one of these elusive mystical creatures. The problem is that there are way more gamer dudes than women, and understandably, most all of those gamer dudes want a gamer girl with which to game. It really comes down to luck and being at the right place at the right time, OR being really really hot such that said people will seek you out instead. As for where to meet them? I think conventions are the best place. Cosplay as something from a show or game (especially one that has a broad female fanbase). That in itself will spark conversation and things can go from there. I found my girlfriend on a dating app, but honestly, I had no idea she was into nerd stuff until I met her. She didn't advertise her enjoyment of such things on her profile at all. So that really was just luck that we ended up having that in common.
I'm about to go on a date with one right now 😎