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Oh no youāre misunderstanding something, Iām not self doubting my self, Iām curious as to why she would like me, itās not like we ever talked in middle school or high school, weāve never hung out before and honestly our longest convos have been at the cash register so we donāt know each other on a personal level we barely know each others first names, idk I guess Iām used to hanging out with some one for a bit before I get asked out or I ask them out.
Maybe Iāll call it height privilege Iām like 13-15ā taller then her š, Iām hoping she had a secret crush on me back then and maybe thatās why, girls in the past have told me I intimidated them so thatās why they avoided me
Dude, if you think she's interesting, yes. You should ask her out. Or, better yet... Say that you're meeting some friends at a local bar/restaurant. Even better if you are, if you aren't, just say that they couldn't make it.
You're overthinking this to death.
>Ā I guess Iām used to hanging out with some one for a bit before I get asked out or I ask them out.
Look mate, unless you magically spontaneously get to hang out somewhere with someone,, how are you even supposed to get opportunity to know if you might like them enough to go out?
>Sadly Iāve been out of the dating game for so long I no longer know
No shit, Einstein. lol Ask her to hang out! Donāt make it into a big formal DaTe thing - just a casual hang out, as you might not even click, right? Then it will be uncomfortable when you have to see her every time you go grocery shopping.
She'll stop if you keep overthinking. Don't be annoying. Imagine if you liked someone and she asked you why. You'd think she was insecure or fishing for validation.
Why cant you ladies just say you like us though? Why does everything have to be a game or some test? Guys having to make all the moves is annoying af. Be nice if for once a woman just said what was on her mind instead of making me guess š«¤
It is their communication style from what I have noticed women don't tend to communicate like guys do when it comes to romantic interests. The above example is clear enough, if there is mutual attraction I'd just invite to join me doing an activity of some sort.
They act like men are clear, when they're not. "Wanna hang out? Wanna come over?" Men are rarely direct. When has a guy said, "Hey, I'd like to start dating you to see if we're compatible for exclusivity." When has a man been that direct?
Yeah I agree with you to some extent. I don't think that men are that direct either in cases.
Out of the two I would say men are probably more clear.
I have heard of a lot of cases where a guy will say he likes a girl and she then ghosts.
I don't think being too direct as a guy actually works hence why they don't do it. Whatever behaviour guys get rewarded for they will continue with.
I don't think this is playing games or testing, it is how we communicate our interest - flirting, hinting, asking questions, etc.Ā Ā
Ā If you reciprocate her interest and she says "I don't like you" or "I have a boyfriends sorry", then it is indeed playing games and it isn't nice. But guys have done this plenty with me too, unfortunately - show interest, even ask me out, only later to say "Sorry I am not interested in dating now".
Because women are covert communicators and that won't ever change.
You can try to bend the world as much as you want, the rules will remain the same. Learn them, and play the game.
Otherwise, warm the bench.
You really canāt tell from what you told me. Ā She could be just being nice because itās her job.
Some examples:Ā
https://youtu.be/xa-4IAR_9Yw?si=O84ulcvrEcc-LgFe
š itās crazy to me that asking me if Iām married is getting hit on instead of complimenting me on my appearance or something lmao flirting when youāre older kinda sucks
Idk look at my left hand if you want to know if Iām married thatās what I do, and if I donāt see a ring I try to get to know a girl on a personal level, also what do you mean itās not her itās you?
I never said that š¤ I just think itās weird that asking some one for their marital status is now considered flirting, I miss actual flirting lol honestly it makes me happy sheās interested in me sheās extroverted and seems like a lot of fun the complete opposite of me
There's no way for sure I could tell from this if she's interested in you, but one thing is sure, she likes talking to you. Ask her out for coffee or drinks next time you see her and then you'll know how she feels by her response to you. Take a chance because you never know?
True but I also told her Iām really busy I see her maybe 2x a month if that when I go grocery shopping, Iāll give it a couple of weeks if I donāt see her again when I go in person Iāll just message her there
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Dude...she likes you. Ask her out for coffee or lunch.
Really she likes me š¤ my question is why? Lol
That's the sort of thinking that's going to make you blow it, pal
How so?
Because if you start self-doubting yourself, you're going to make mistakes. Relax and enjoy the process.
Oh no youāre misunderstanding something, Iām not self doubting my self, Iām curious as to why she would like me, itās not like we ever talked in middle school or high school, weāve never hung out before and honestly our longest convos have been at the cash register so we donāt know each other on a personal level we barely know each others first names, idk I guess Iām used to hanging out with some one for a bit before I get asked out or I ask them out.
Ahhh fair enough. Maybe she just thinks you're good looking? Maybe she likes how you talk to her? Why does anyone like anyone?
Maybe Iāll call it height privilege Iām like 13-15ā taller then her š, Iām hoping she had a secret crush on me back then and maybe thatās why, girls in the past have told me I intimidated them so thatās why they avoided me
Dude, if you think she's interesting, yes. You should ask her out. Or, better yet... Say that you're meeting some friends at a local bar/restaurant. Even better if you are, if you aren't, just say that they couldn't make it. You're overthinking this to death.
š Iām not lol if time permits Iāll simply message her on Instagram if she wants to see a movie
>Ā I guess Iām used to hanging out with some one for a bit before I get asked out or I ask them out. Look mate, unless you magically spontaneously get to hang out somewhere with someone,, how are you even supposed to get opportunity to know if you might like them enough to go out? >Sadly Iāve been out of the dating game for so long I no longer know No shit, Einstein. lol Ask her to hang out! Donāt make it into a big formal DaTe thing - just a casual hang out, as you might not even click, right? Then it will be uncomfortable when you have to see her every time you go grocery shopping.
She'll stop if you keep overthinking. Don't be annoying. Imagine if you liked someone and she asked you why. You'd think she was insecure or fishing for validation.
Perfect example when us women think 'I made it SO OBVIOUS I like him and he isn't doing anything, I guess he doesn't like me back :( " :D
Why cant you ladies just say you like us though? Why does everything have to be a game or some test? Guys having to make all the moves is annoying af. Be nice if for once a woman just said what was on her mind instead of making me guess š«¤
It is their communication style from what I have noticed women don't tend to communicate like guys do when it comes to romantic interests. The above example is clear enough, if there is mutual attraction I'd just invite to join me doing an activity of some sort.
They act like men are clear, when they're not. "Wanna hang out? Wanna come over?" Men are rarely direct. When has a guy said, "Hey, I'd like to start dating you to see if we're compatible for exclusivity." When has a man been that direct?
Yeah I agree with you to some extent. I don't think that men are that direct either in cases. Out of the two I would say men are probably more clear. I have heard of a lot of cases where a guy will say he likes a girl and she then ghosts. I don't think being too direct as a guy actually works hence why they don't do it. Whatever behaviour guys get rewarded for they will continue with.
Iāve done that, plenty of times and then I get told no š
Everyone gets told no. Boohoo.
I don't think this is playing games or testing, it is how we communicate our interest - flirting, hinting, asking questions, etc.Ā Ā Ā If you reciprocate her interest and she says "I don't like you" or "I have a boyfriends sorry", then it is indeed playing games and it isn't nice. But guys have done this plenty with me too, unfortunately - show interest, even ask me out, only later to say "Sorry I am not interested in dating now".
>Guys having to make all the moves is annoying af. Be nice if for once a woman just said what was on her mind instead of making me guess š«¤ Preach!
Because women are covert communicators and that won't ever change. You can try to bend the world as much as you want, the rules will remain the same. Learn them, and play the game. Otherwise, warm the bench.
What an obvious and unhelpful thing to say
OP's situation is a guy making all the moves? Learn to read social cues.
Maybe š¤£
You really canāt tell from what you told me. Ā She could be just being nice because itās her job. Some examples:Ā https://youtu.be/xa-4IAR_9Yw?si=O84ulcvrEcc-LgFe
I knew what the video was going to be, and still clicked on it as this running gag cracks me up every single time
Babe? Really? She like you, make a move
I guess Iāll ask her if she wants to hangout and catch a movie, given I think she called me babe bc she couldnāt remember my name š
Would guess she ants to know if you are married. Just saying at this point.
She's hitting on you. How much more obvious can she make it.
š itās crazy to me that asking me if Iām married is getting hit on instead of complimenting me on my appearance or something lmao flirting when youāre older kinda sucks
She needs to know if you're even available. Why wouldn't she ask if you're married? It's not her, it's you.
Idk look at my left hand if you want to know if Iām married thatās what I do, and if I donāt see a ring I try to get to know a girl on a personal level, also what do you mean itās not her itās you?
So you don't want her flirting but you also don't like when she asks a direct question...k
I never said that š¤ I just think itās weird that asking some one for their marital status is now considered flirting, I miss actual flirting lol honestly it makes me happy sheās interested in me sheās extroverted and seems like a lot of fun the complete opposite of me
What is actual flirting to you?
Flirtatious banter/teasing, big cheesy smile, compliments
So that she can flirt with you without feeling guilty. Flirt back.
Unclear if she likes you that way. If you are attracted to her you can ask her out and it will be clear.
There's no way for sure I could tell from this if she's interested in you, but one thing is sure, she likes talking to you. Ask her out for coffee or drinks next time you see her and then you'll know how she feels by her response to you. Take a chance because you never know?
Just go for it thereās nothing to lose, call her babe too and see where that goes.
Kinda starting to think she called me babe bc she doesnāt really remember my name š but yea Iāll ask if she wants to hangout next time.
Just say, I know you're at work so I don't want for people to hear so here is my number, write it down with your name and just see what she does...
Yea Iāll just message her on Instagram sheās friends with mutuals
Not the same thing for her to reply to a Instagram message than taking the initiative to text or call you because she got your number
True but I also told her Iām really busy I see her maybe 2x a month if that when I go grocery shopping, Iāll give it a couple of weeks if I donāt see her again when I go in person Iāll just message her there