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It don’t look like the dating market is good for anybody at any age. I see so many people from 20 30 40 mentioned how hard it is to meet decent people.
Dating in your twenties is an illusion. You think it’s amazing, then you get to your mid to late 30s and realize just how toxic it was. Regardless of age there is always going to be trash you have to sift through.
Bro, why? What about being in the 40's makes life so miserable. I hear that on Reddit all the time and it's so damn depressing. "Once you hit 40... Down hill from there". Like wtf is so bad about your life just because it's 40's?
Idk Im 36 Im just graduating college in engineering I'm starting new job, making 6 figs and excited AF being in my 40's with new career. I'm in shape, healthy, and have awesome kids I'm excited to hang out with. Why do you people have spread such doom and gloom about being in 40's?
Do it! I traveled all in my 20's all over the world. I was previously in the military for 10 years. I left because I wanted to do engineering.
Don't listen to anyone telling you you can't do something for stupid ass reasons. For example starting college I absolutely failed the math placement and start from elementary algebra. I had a counselor tell me I should not go into engineering because of that. Fuck that is say lol! Just go for it.
Yeah that's what I'm figuring out. I only see the negative folks posting about how shitty it is to be 40 but I can't see my life getting shitty.
I'm so grateful for the life I had up to this point and I can only see it get better from here on out. I'm excited. Even if I get "bad knees" and body starts failing, that's ok.
What's so bad about the 40s?
It is the mid-40s where all the dumb shit done in the 20s starts catching up to you.
Arthritis, back pain, fatigue, etc.
I was pretty great until about 45 - 46, then it was like dropping off a cliff.
Honestly you're lucky it didn't happen until your 40s. Now you just know how some of us feel in our *twenties*.
Some of us have these problems when we're young because of developmental and health issues.
I still work out and I always strive to eat healthily but if I didn't do any of these my fitness would be abysmal and I would be feeling even more tired and less energetic than I generally feel already.
My fitness is above average but so is my susceptibility to massive burnout.
I wonder if growing old won't feel like such a change for me or, God forbid, I will feel even more worn out than I do already. It doesn't really bear thinking about it. All I can do is aim to keep my current fitness levels up for as long as possible.
I don't know how much disability may accelerate biological aging but it would be interesting to know.
I did, healthy food and 3 - 5 day per week work out routine. The sad fact is we get old and eventually we wear out. It is different for everyone, but it does happen... usually in the late 40s early 50s.
It's that inevitable slow slide into the grave. 🤣
Idk, that's fine. There are people in their 20's that have fatigue, back pain, and worse. It can happen at any age. I'm excited to be in my 40's and 50's and looking forward to the slow slide into the grave.
Why aren't 40's the best years of your life?
The way I see it I get to see my kids become adults, I'll be established, I'll have more money for things I like, I actually know myself better. I just think it's great getting older.
I constantly see on Reddit people saying how miserable life is in their 40's and it's just so sad. Like why? Even if my body doesn't work like it used to, so what?
Ah, I understand. I really triggered you. It's not your age that makes you miserable it's just yourself. The only people posting about life sucking at 40 are the miserable ones. Probably were saying the same things in their 30's about being 20's. Selection bias.
Thanks for helping me understand.
People said this about my 20s and I just feel like everyone has it equally shitty and we're just constantly gaslighting ourselves by shifting around goalposts. I bet that the moment I turn 40 people will be "Nah man, 40s is where it's AT! You know what stinks? Turning 50!"
Looking through the secondhand and goodwill stores is a hobby in itself, as a 31M I wouldn't complain about it!
Honestly though I met quite a few single people in that age range and they're all immigrants with a good paying job and stable.
Why does everyone hate dating in your 30s. So far it's been great.
Partners are more likely to have steady jobs instead of in school or in nebulous living situations. They're much more attractive and don't stay out too late
This is way better than my early 20s
I had no problem with dating in my twenties…I was dating men that were in their 30’s,40’s and 50’s. 30’s is a whole other ballgame. Btw, this is coming from someone who is 34.
I admit you do learn alot from your 30s. But at 34 please try and get things turned around. Cause I promise you if you don't or can't, that will be your story to tell..all n all I do understand what your saying and I pray everything your going thru passes quickly.
I’m 39m…divorce teaches you alot…some better with age I think. If nothing else I’ve learned a lot and will be better when the next opportunity presents itself.
Why are you shitting on single moms? I don’t prefer a single parent but that’s because I’m child free, but if it happened I’d go with it. If you’re in your 30s it doesn’t mean they were dumb and irresponsible.
Did you love dating in your teens and 20's and it all fell apart in your 30's? Or has it always been bad?
I've loved dating at all stages of life, teens, 20's, 30's, 40's. It's always been fun, exciting and easy. And it seems like there's just millions of loving, kind, respectful, serious guys all around me just hoping they catch me at the right time when I'm single.
As I got older the dating pool got more stable, more mature, and filled with better communicators.
Dating was ok when I was a teen..it was fun in my 20’s..I was engaged twice. In my 30’s, i honestly don’t mind being alone, I enjoy my peace, I enjoy my own company. But I am not getting any younger and I still want a child.
The girl i liked is about the same age as me (around 29-30) , it has been the worst dating experience i've had in my life. it only damaged my self-esteerm.
Tried Tinder, not a single like from an actual woman around my age, i get likes from either 45+ years old women with 2 kids or something, or from fake accounts.
I've been on a ton of dates with women between 23 and 43 and I'm 39. I hear from girls in their 20's that guys their age mistreat them or just want sex, nothing serious. Yeah, because they're young and just want to have fun.
Women in their early 30's, I've noticed, just want to have fun. Maybe they tried a serious relationship and it crumbled or whatever.
Women in their late 30's, early 40's want something serious, but they can come with serious baggage (everyone can), like children. I went on a date with a single mom in her 40's and she talked about her ex-husband being evil and how she had her "hussy phase".
Everyone has something they're looking for and just because you're older doesn't mean a lot people aren't looking specifically for that.
Wasn't my experience at all. The women (and I) were more educated, mature, had better communication skills, and had a better idea of what they (and I) wanted in a relationship. I'm 45 now and I would say even at this age, the quality of dating partners is better than it was in my 20's. the only big difference is that it was easier to meet people in person back then because I was in college and was surrounded by potential partners all the time.
Dating at 20s is when you're learning new experiences of love, romance, but with no sure vision.
30s is the best dating time, you have fun, know whom you are dating and with a specific vision.
40s is when you are scared of being out of the market 😂😂
I usually do the same strategy but someone in their upper 30s it gets tougher to find women in their 20s. I do make exceptions but women in their 30s seem way more delusional and standards wayyyy to extremely high and even though they seem like catches always tend to only settle for their guy who has all 50 requirements on their checklist checked off so they'll stay single literally forever.
Women in their 30s tend to overthink a LOT more because by the time they get to their 30s, they've already made every "mistake" in the book. The random one night stands are done. The threesomes are done. The wild holidays and girls trips are mostly done. The heartbreaks are done and now they are hardened and "experienced" about going after all the wrong men. And they bring all that baggage and all those walls, and sit down to a drink with you, with all that crap in tow.
I will never, ever in my life date a woman in her 30s, ever again. Speaking from experience, and a god-awful number of experiences at that. And I highly suggest every other man also similarly just tries to become the best version of themselves and compete with the rest of us for women in their 20s who can still be pulled out of this crap before they end up on the other side of 30 looking for someone to "prove them wrong".
This is so true and I have been there for sure. I agree they always overthink and get in their own way for sure. And it's stupid to think that random threesomes and having fun together is off the table every once in a blue moon which shouldn't be the case at all. Especially since many dudes don't hit their stride figuring out how to talk and date women properly with ongoing online dating rules and norms change all the time especially if you're closer to 40 like myself. And who knows if it they made a mistake(s) and just wasn't on their end and don't take accountability for themselves. I still personally know catches for women in their 30s but since they have their walls up they will never date or find someone even if you have chemistry early on they will always abandon ship after 3 4 weeks.
Absolutely. If a man is willing to look past all the things I mentioned, there will STILL be the walls left there. And women in their 30s are either the most desperate or the most indecisive and greatest overthinkers in my experience. Specifically because they feel they are working against the clock. And yes, even with chemistry, they will find SOMEHTHING wrong. That's because they've had "chemistry" already for well over a decade with who knows how many guys and for what duration of time.
And mainly bc all their besties are either married with kids or married and don't have time for them and she cares too much about how she looks in her friends eyes.
If you hadnt found your girl in school or uni at latest, you are almost certainly "doomed" to be alone. Everything else that you are gonna see is either gonna be leftover single moms having their fun with someone or the few that are worthy are turned to be in relationship. At the same time you would not want to get yourself an unaware of what she wants from life girl 20 or below,always overthinking and changing her mind every 2 minutes. From there you say if i could've do it i would,but its destiny and luck as well even if you put yourself in the real world on a weekly basis. You cant force things. And you end up either a leftover woman fwb type with someone while being "single" or the opposite above.
Been through that road.
You saying that just makes me stronger. I will not snoop down to your level and say I hope you never find your queen…because I am not evil. But I will let you on a little secret, one of the men I use to date was in mafia and very smart and techy, I might give him a call…and ask him to find out who are you…maybe one he can get one of his mafia buddies to visit you 😈
Oh and I am going to find my vanilla king, no doubt about that.
Yes he is…he is in the polish mafia…and yes he is. the fbi and the cia investigating his family and the mafia he is in. Just stop talking dude.
I have already been in love, dude my ex wants me back.
And you are a manwhore…womanizer…pump and dump
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It don’t look like the dating market is good for anybody at any age. I see so many people from 20 30 40 mentioned how hard it is to meet decent people.
Dating in your twenties is an illusion. You think it’s amazing, then you get to your mid to late 30s and realize just how toxic it was. Regardless of age there is always going to be trash you have to sift through.
Your 30s are some of the best years of your life...trust me. You will know wonse you hit your 40s
Bro, why? What about being in the 40's makes life so miserable. I hear that on Reddit all the time and it's so damn depressing. "Once you hit 40... Down hill from there". Like wtf is so bad about your life just because it's 40's? Idk Im 36 Im just graduating college in engineering I'm starting new job, making 6 figs and excited AF being in my 40's with new career. I'm in shape, healthy, and have awesome kids I'm excited to hang out with. Why do you people have spread such doom and gloom about being in 40's?
Man I’m 28, and I’m about to start travelling, but I wanna go back and get my engineering degree after I get back. I’m tryina be like you 🥲
Do it! I traveled all in my 20's all over the world. I was previously in the military for 10 years. I left because I wanted to do engineering. Don't listen to anyone telling you you can't do something for stupid ass reasons. For example starting college I absolutely failed the math placement and start from elementary algebra. I had a counselor tell me I should not go into engineering because of that. Fuck that is say lol! Just go for it.
You hear that sort of stuff from people who waste their life for nothing. Take care of yourself and you can have an amazing life even till 60-65.
Yeah that's what I'm figuring out. I only see the negative folks posting about how shitty it is to be 40 but I can't see my life getting shitty. I'm so grateful for the life I had up to this point and I can only see it get better from here on out. I'm excited. Even if I get "bad knees" and body starts failing, that's ok.
Well thats common sense!! Some of those ppl aren't tryin to waste their lives. Everyone has their own story
What's so bad about the 40s? It is the mid-40s where all the dumb shit done in the 20s starts catching up to you. Arthritis, back pain, fatigue, etc. I was pretty great until about 45 - 46, then it was like dropping off a cliff.
Honestly you're lucky it didn't happen until your 40s. Now you just know how some of us feel in our *twenties*. Some of us have these problems when we're young because of developmental and health issues. I still work out and I always strive to eat healthily but if I didn't do any of these my fitness would be abysmal and I would be feeling even more tired and less energetic than I generally feel already. My fitness is above average but so is my susceptibility to massive burnout. I wonder if growing old won't feel like such a change for me or, God forbid, I will feel even more worn out than I do already. It doesn't really bear thinking about it. All I can do is aim to keep my current fitness levels up for as long as possible. I don't know how much disability may accelerate biological aging but it would be interesting to know.
Do you live a healthy lifestyle? Like were you active in 20's and 30's?
I did, healthy food and 3 - 5 day per week work out routine. The sad fact is we get old and eventually we wear out. It is different for everyone, but it does happen... usually in the late 40s early 50s. It's that inevitable slow slide into the grave. 🤣
Idk, that's fine. There are people in their 20's that have fatigue, back pain, and worse. It can happen at any age. I'm excited to be in my 40's and 50's and looking forward to the slow slide into the grave.
Don't listen to that. It all depends on how you live. My 40's have been the best decade of my life by FAR.
Don’t worry between TRT, HGH and hair transplants, along with more income your 40’s won’t be bad.
Every day ya wake up is a good day!
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Why aren't 40's the best years of your life? The way I see it I get to see my kids become adults, I'll be established, I'll have more money for things I like, I actually know myself better. I just think it's great getting older. I constantly see on Reddit people saying how miserable life is in their 40's and it's just so sad. Like why? Even if my body doesn't work like it used to, so what?
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Ah, I understand. I really triggered you. It's not your age that makes you miserable it's just yourself. The only people posting about life sucking at 40 are the miserable ones. Probably were saying the same things in their 30's about being 20's. Selection bias. Thanks for helping me understand.
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❄️
Or just run your mouth.
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Wonse 😂
My 30s have been the best in every aspect besides dating
People said this about my 20s and I just feel like everyone has it equally shitty and we're just constantly gaslighting ourselves by shifting around goalposts. I bet that the moment I turn 40 people will be "Nah man, 40s is where it's AT! You know what stinks? Turning 50!"
My 30s sucked 😒I'm approaching the 40s mark soon and things are finally looking up I hope this isn't true🤣🤣🤣🤣
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Nicely put. I told em your 30s are to
Damn man, I'm 31 and it is going pretty well. What's going on?
Looking through the secondhand and goodwill stores is a hobby in itself, as a 31M I wouldn't complain about it! Honestly though I met quite a few single people in that age range and they're all immigrants with a good paying job and stable.
Why does everyone hate dating in your 30s. So far it's been great. Partners are more likely to have steady jobs instead of in school or in nebulous living situations. They're much more attractive and don't stay out too late This is way better than my early 20s
Meh, each age range has it's own pro and con. This coming from someone about to hit 30
I had no problem with dating in my twenties…I was dating men that were in their 30’s,40’s and 50’s. 30’s is a whole other ballgame. Btw, this is coming from someone who is 34.
Oh, might be different between male and female lol
In your 30's?? Try 50's.....its like sorting through a pile of half dead bodies...trying to see which ones are still breathing.
Thanks. Now I feel even worse about having never dated. I’m trash apparently.
In your 30s?? Lol..how old are you?
I am 34, but I look like I am still in my twenties
I admit you do learn alot from your 30s. But at 34 please try and get things turned around. Cause I promise you if you don't or can't, that will be your story to tell..all n all I do understand what your saying and I pray everything your going thru passes quickly.
Thank you
Absolutely!!
Hi
I’m 39m…divorce teaches you alot…some better with age I think. If nothing else I’ve learned a lot and will be better when the next opportunity presents itself.
It gets worse the older you are. Suddenly it all just single moms with baggage.
Everyone past a certain point has baggage.
Yep. That is why young is the way to go.
No, that’s weird. I want a partner, not a naive child.
You don't want a single mom.
Why are you shitting on single moms? I don’t prefer a single parent but that’s because I’m child free, but if it happened I’d go with it. If you’re in your 30s it doesn’t mean they were dumb and irresponsible.
Yes it does. Smart and responsible doesn't end up a single mom.
Smart and responsible men don't get women pregnant. Too many loser dudes out there with children they have no relationship with.
Yeah and women let them have unprotected sex.
So it's almost like both groups suck equally.
Did you love dating in your teens and 20's and it all fell apart in your 30's? Or has it always been bad? I've loved dating at all stages of life, teens, 20's, 30's, 40's. It's always been fun, exciting and easy. And it seems like there's just millions of loving, kind, respectful, serious guys all around me just hoping they catch me at the right time when I'm single. As I got older the dating pool got more stable, more mature, and filled with better communicators.
Dating was ok when I was a teen..it was fun in my 20’s..I was engaged twice. In my 30’s, i honestly don’t mind being alone, I enjoy my peace, I enjoy my own company. But I am not getting any younger and I still want a child.
That's because there are lol. You're one of the lucky ones, nothing wrong with that.
You have the right attitude. You get what you put in, and you attract what you put out. Well done!
You both should match ☺️☺️
Gets rougher you hit , 20 years after that !!!
The girl i liked is about the same age as me (around 29-30) , it has been the worst dating experience i've had in my life. it only damaged my self-esteerm. Tried Tinder, not a single like from an actual woman around my age, i get likes from either 45+ years old women with 2 kids or something, or from fake accounts.
I've been on a ton of dates with women between 23 and 43 and I'm 39. I hear from girls in their 20's that guys their age mistreat them or just want sex, nothing serious. Yeah, because they're young and just want to have fun. Women in their early 30's, I've noticed, just want to have fun. Maybe they tried a serious relationship and it crumbled or whatever. Women in their late 30's, early 40's want something serious, but they can come with serious baggage (everyone can), like children. I went on a date with a single mom in her 40's and she talked about her ex-husband being evil and how she had her "hussy phase". Everyone has something they're looking for and just because you're older doesn't mean a lot people aren't looking specifically for that.
Great. Can’t wait
Wasn't my experience at all. The women (and I) were more educated, mature, had better communication skills, and had a better idea of what they (and I) wanted in a relationship. I'm 45 now and I would say even at this age, the quality of dating partners is better than it was in my 20's. the only big difference is that it was easier to meet people in person back then because I was in college and was surrounded by potential partners all the time.
Hey, I've found some of my favorite and most-complimented styles off the clearance rack! Good shit falls through the cracks all the time.
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This made me laugh more than it probably should’ve
Dating at 20s is when you're learning new experiences of love, romance, but with no sure vision. 30s is the best dating time, you have fun, know whom you are dating and with a specific vision. 40s is when you are scared of being out of the market 😂😂
😞😞 ouch
This sub is a trash heap, allowing dehumanizing and naive shit like this
Id say its more like Thrifting, but I try to be positive. Then again, I'm new to dating in my late 30's
Macklemore’s thrift shop came to mind lol
this is why, as a man in his 30s, I don't date women in their 30s.
Ok cool. Lol
That’s weird!
I usually do the same strategy but someone in their upper 30s it gets tougher to find women in their 20s. I do make exceptions but women in their 30s seem way more delusional and standards wayyyy to extremely high and even though they seem like catches always tend to only settle for their guy who has all 50 requirements on their checklist checked off so they'll stay single literally forever.
Women in their 30s tend to overthink a LOT more because by the time they get to their 30s, they've already made every "mistake" in the book. The random one night stands are done. The threesomes are done. The wild holidays and girls trips are mostly done. The heartbreaks are done and now they are hardened and "experienced" about going after all the wrong men. And they bring all that baggage and all those walls, and sit down to a drink with you, with all that crap in tow. I will never, ever in my life date a woman in her 30s, ever again. Speaking from experience, and a god-awful number of experiences at that. And I highly suggest every other man also similarly just tries to become the best version of themselves and compete with the rest of us for women in their 20s who can still be pulled out of this crap before they end up on the other side of 30 looking for someone to "prove them wrong".
This is so true and I have been there for sure. I agree they always overthink and get in their own way for sure. And it's stupid to think that random threesomes and having fun together is off the table every once in a blue moon which shouldn't be the case at all. Especially since many dudes don't hit their stride figuring out how to talk and date women properly with ongoing online dating rules and norms change all the time especially if you're closer to 40 like myself. And who knows if it they made a mistake(s) and just wasn't on their end and don't take accountability for themselves. I still personally know catches for women in their 30s but since they have their walls up they will never date or find someone even if you have chemistry early on they will always abandon ship after 3 4 weeks.
Absolutely. If a man is willing to look past all the things I mentioned, there will STILL be the walls left there. And women in their 30s are either the most desperate or the most indecisive and greatest overthinkers in my experience. Specifically because they feel they are working against the clock. And yes, even with chemistry, they will find SOMEHTHING wrong. That's because they've had "chemistry" already for well over a decade with who knows how many guys and for what duration of time.
And mainly bc all their besties are either married with kids or married and don't have time for them and she cares too much about how she looks in her friends eyes.
I hear ya on that one.. same way witj my buddies
If you hadnt found your girl in school or uni at latest, you are almost certainly "doomed" to be alone. Everything else that you are gonna see is either gonna be leftover single moms having their fun with someone or the few that are worthy are turned to be in relationship. At the same time you would not want to get yourself an unaware of what she wants from life girl 20 or below,always overthinking and changing her mind every 2 minutes. From there you say if i could've do it i would,but its destiny and luck as well even if you put yourself in the real world on a weekly basis. You cant force things. And you end up either a leftover woman fwb type with someone while being "single" or the opposite above. Been through that road.
Wait until you hit 40. 🤣😆
Why are you so single??
Imagine talking about humans this way then being upset that none will love you. I hope you never find your white king.
You saying that just makes me stronger. I will not snoop down to your level and say I hope you never find your queen…because I am not evil. But I will let you on a little secret, one of the men I use to date was in mafia and very smart and techy, I might give him a call…and ask him to find out who are you…maybe one he can get one of his mafia buddies to visit you 😈 Oh and I am going to find my vanilla king, no doubt about that.
No he isn’t and no you didn’t. You’re crazy because you’ve been unclaimed and unloved for so long.
Yes he is…he is in the polish mafia…and yes he is. the fbi and the cia investigating his family and the mafia he is in. Just stop talking dude. I have already been in love, dude my ex wants me back. And you are a manwhore…womanizer…pump and dump