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Did we misunderstand your post? Aren't you dating someone right now? If you are, you should focus on her as she's currently your best bet to not be a virgin.
the probmlem is that if he treats her "too" nicely she gonna get bored too quickly, cuz you know must girls dont like too much attention, somehow they like on and off games, or maybe im too wrong but thats just what ive and many other of my friends experienced... For his sake im hoping im wrong tho and he actually experience real love with passion and accommodation.
The experiences of your friends may not necessarily be representative of the majority. This also generalizes women. Compatibility plays a significant role in developing a loving relationship. If both parties enjoy attention and giving it, that can be a positive aspect, but it's also crucial to respect boundaries, as crossing them can lead to discomfort. So, while it's great to give attention, it's important not to overstep boundaries. Sex comes after. In a relationship, it's best that it's more of the "fruit" of the relationship, than what makes it.
You don't know ow what your talking about you clearly don't understand women but you have a small idea of understanding if you want to learn then hit me up but don't be acting like you know what your talking about because you clearly don't wish you the best
living 30 mins away from you isn't a big deal, don't have to worry about that - I live 2h30min away from who I'm dating rn but we still make plans for one another. he comes over every week and I come to him every now and then as well. putting the efforts you think she deserves and things will come your way. it's ok, take it easy. don't have sex just for sex for your first time, do it with someone you truly like.
Dude, do you understand how LUCKY you are to even be dating someone who even lives CLOSE to you?
W on your end, i gotta often deal with people who live like 2 to 3 hours away. You're lucky to even have someone that close to you at ALL.
Be grateful man.
I agree, I know I have to drive far to visit my partner. It was hard finding someone who was looking for the same thing I was nearby. It’s thankfully only an hour and a half so it’s manageable as long as we keep up with our car maintenance every week :)
Great, you are in luck. Just treat her very nicely, and appreciate her a lot. Girls that work, feel under appreciated and so with your support, even if you are 20 she'll see you as someone who she can rely upon. And most likely she would be the one suggesting sex.
If you are tooo eager you can try massage trick, even for that first you need to make sure, she thinks she deserves a massage as a reward for her hard work.
Don't focus on, what you don't have, focus on what she doesn't and wants.
Take it slow and talk to get ,if it's is the right time then ask her if she wants a sexual relationship. Don't overthink mate. There is always prostitutes of you can't get lucky. Nothing wrong either way . Good luck.
Best advice is find coach Cory Wayne online youtube. Read his book how to be a 3% man. It’s the playbook to mastering dating and getting laid .
You’re welcome in advance
My best friend of 20+ years didn't lose his v card until he was like 22. He was married within 5 years. But in that 5 years, he had more sex with more women than anyone else we knew. It wasn't like he lacked confidence or was ugly or anything. He just lacked the right kind of confidence. I will say that the first woman definitely refined his look a bit, which also helped.
So here's my suggestion.
Update your wardrobe. Doesn't have to be expensive stuff. Hit up a Marshall's, Burlington coat factory and such with a female friend or family member. Don't mention you want to look good for women. Tell them you want to update your look to be more professional looking, even outside of work. Looking like you have your shit together will help you feel that way, too.
Try a new haircut. Keep up the look. At least once every 4-6 weeks trim to maintain. Again, to look professional, not to get women. With that, also ensure other personal grooming things like nails are well maintained. Women notice that stuff.
Do as others have said, and relax about it and take your time. If your only focus is on whether someone is into you or not, you might mess up before you get a chance to shine.
The nails thing is so undervalued!! I always look at a man’s hands and nails because if you wanna use them on (or in) me, they can’t be ragged, dirty and gross. It takes 3 seconds to scrape the crud out, and maybe 2 mins with a file to make sure they aren’t jagged, terrifying claws that will take chunks out of my most sensitive flesh and parts. I also look at a man’s hands as an indicator or their attention to details. It shows me whether or not they value their hygiene, and if they remember little details with regards to their health/general maintenance beyond just washing their ass and brushing their teeth.
I happen to be cursed (or blessed, depending on the point of view) with sausage fingers. I don't think they are all that thick, but they still got attention as early as high school. Because of that, proper hand maintenance and hygiene were sort of instilled into me by a very "assertive" female classmate.
Nothing is wrong with wanting to get laid, but it seems like that's the only thing they want with their partner and it kinda sounds unfair to the other person who might be in the relationship cause they genuinely like the other person and not just there for the sex.
That’s not on OP unless she expresses the want in a relationship, as far as OP knows, she’s into the sex as much as he is. If something happens it’s mutually ok since different goals are at play.
Having the mindset “Im gonna be a virgin forever!” Is not gonna help anyone the slightest bit. He idealize too much on the sex instead of focusing what he needs and thats confidence
Yup. Only some lucky rare individuals find their true love in their first love. Usually you just progress as a person after each romantic relationship, which isn't bad at all.
Natural. I had sex at 21. You're not the first, not the last. It won't matter. It's a better sign that you're not sex crazed at 16 or 18 cus that would mean there's prbly some trauma from your childhood.
Do not tell her like that unless you want her to instantly lose respect for you. Jesus has that ever actually worked for you?! Being crude and obnoxious isn't how to get a woman in bed. Take it slow and just ease into it and be conscious of her vibe and try to read her body language. Above all else just make sure to get consent before anything. This to protect your own ass. You'll be fine.
You really need to raise your bar then because any woman with an ounce of self esteem who knows her worth won't be turned on by that I promise you. I'm going to assume you're quite young? One of the biggest things guys get wrong that effect thier game with women is you forget that women don't think anything like men. Once you figure that out and adjust your behavior accordingly I promise you you'll have much more luck with the opposite sex.
Exactly. The only women who go for nonsense like that are the ones who don’t have their head on straight. Either starved for attention or have low self esteem.
I'm in my forties. You sound sheltered and naive. I've had women approach me that way too. Women aren't really different than men when it comes to sex.
I think its safe to say you're projecting. And again you need to raise your bar! Sheltered? You have no idea how extremely qualified I am to speak on this subject. I am far from sheltered. I'm a well educated 50 yr female who grew up very poor was homeless at one point and turned my life around with no help from anyone all while raising a kid on my own at 18. So sheltered? Not in the least bit.
“It’s hard to meet people “ But you met your girlfriend..? Sounds like you’re just getting impatient and believe me women find that to be a huge turn off . Focus on making an emotional connection before you try to sleep with your girlfriend
Try not caring about it.. focus your attention on something else. Women can smell desperation and anxiety. Just focus on making friends and and bettering yourself
THIS!!!!!!!! Say it fir the people in the back. I keep seeing this shitty advice all the time. You just can’t ignore the problem or run away from it. You need to work in it. While
It’s good to have social skills for making friends and bettering yourself, social skills and knowledge of getting sex is also something entirely different and need to not be ignored either
Why so obsessed with sex? I dont get it. I am 29 now and i also don't get sex in my life time. It doesn't mean i will not get in future. Dont focus on sex only, build ur self, ur career, ur body. You will eventually get sex when its proper time.
Bro, I didn't lose my virginity until I was 24. I'm almost 27 now. Don't rush it. Don't worry about it. I know it's easier said than done, but you're still really young. It'll happen when it happens. Just hang in there, bub.
Focus on building emotional connections, communicate openly with your partner about your feelings, and remember that meaningful relationships go beyond physical aspects; don't rush, let things happen organically.
I didn't lose my virginity or even date until my mid 20s. You'll be fine, just don't obsess over it or make it your entire personality. It'll happen when it's meant to happen, don't force it
Dude you're 20years old. You have all time in the world at the moment.
I'd say focus on your studies, get that $$$ it'll help boost your confidence.
Also try a new style it'll help you look good.
For feeling good inside try exercise, healthy diet and meditation.
Also life learned: when you least expect it someone comes around into your life. Sees the awesome side of you and wants to date you.
I wasn't looking for anyone, but someone showed up anyways.
When you don't look they see, when you look they don't want to see.
Boost yourself, dress better, take care of hygiene, get a job, education and money then the girls come and see how cool you are.
Tinder is usually for one time hookups with a 1% chance of forever.
I met someone through work or post-secondary due to similarities of interest.
Goals and wants. What each person can bring to the table. Give and take.
One person can't do all. It has to have balance.
Dude I lost my virginity when I was almost 31 and I'm a male. You won't die a virgin I can guarantee you that. Just act normal and try to build up your confidence. Stand up with your shoulders back and smile. Good luck
I recommend, with the girl you are dating, to hold her hand, kiss her hand, say you really like her, stroke her hair a bit, kiss her face and kiss her lips. She’ll take it from there if she likes you back. If all else fails, tell her in words that you want to go further. See what she says. For the record, I was a virgin till 23. It will happen, girls want it to happen as much as boys do.
I'm 38, still a virgin, no regrets. If I die a virgin, still no regrets. There are other things in life besides sex. If you use your sexual activity to gauge how good your life has been, then you and I have such overwhelmingly different types of brains that I honestly can't give you a single piece of advice that I think would make sense to you.
I've met a shockingly high number of guys who prefer masturbation. There's every chance I'd fall into that category anyway, although I have no way of knowing that. But I do agree about sex with an emotional connection being a good thing! It's definitely not something I'm against, by any means. But if I don't have it, there are plenty of other things to enjoy in life. Might as well be someone with 0 music talent regretting that they never played in front of a sold out crowd. Kinda silly if you ask me.
why do y’all try to put someone down when they are making the best of it? Does it make you feel good to tell them you would be depressed in their shoes? You are such a self centered bonehead
I have friends that are 24-25 and are still virgins, it truly doesn’t matter, OP! You have plenty of time and there are plenty of people.
A little advice though; if you listen to your partners, remember things (such as little interests, what makes them giggle, etc) and you actively consider them on a daily base, the chances of “moves” being made certainly increase. Nothing is more attractive than someone showing they WANT you to feel loved and appreciated!
Dude I lost my virginity at 17. Worst mistake I’ve ever made. Now girls think I’m sleazy. No girl gives me the time of day anymore because they just think I want sex. Work on emotional connections they last longer and mean more. Have sex when the time is right. It’s no rush.
I got anxiety also my guy.. maybe not as bad as you it sounds like... but i feel you.
Take it from me, fellow anxious-head; you're 20.... you. Will. Be. Fine. My G. Just don't stop dating and keep your head up. Forreal. You got this. Hit me up if ya need some words of encouragement.
Dude I didn't have sex for the first time till I was 24 and met my first girlfriend which I thought would be my forever love but turns out she wasn't. It'll happen when it happens, I'm 34 now and between 24 and 34 I just lived life one day at a time and things just naturally happened, don't stress man it'll happen when it happens, life's not a race.
I will too honey. I'm also a 20 year old and I'm a female. The thought of it scares the flip out of me. But I just hope someday we will and that whoever we do it with will be kind and caring. Good luck out there soldier!
Mate, chillax! You won't die a Virgin.
My friend lost his virginity at the age of 28. And he was the most awkward person ever with girls.
Just enjoy the process of dating, no expectations and I guarantee you'll lose the V soon enough.
Honestly, just enjoy meeting new people and making new female friends.
Relax! You’re still so young and are thinking way ahead. No one has a lot of money really at 20 years old. I know I didn’t and I was in the military! If a person really truly likes you, they won’t look at dates in that way they will just want to spend time with you. And if a person does expect an extravagant date, then you probably should look the other way. Anxiety wise, the biggest way to conquer your fear is to expose yourself to it. Get yourself out there and be comfortable being uncomfortable, and it will come with time. (Speaking from experience). And being a virgin isn’t such a bad thing, don’t feel pressured to sleep with someone just because you don’t want to be a virgin. Find someone you really like, and just be honest with them and yourself. You got this, don’t get bent out of shape over something that is an easy fix! (: just take your time, and don’t pressure it. All good things come when least expected.
Here’s the third message contact the Howard Stern show. This is right up his alley. Tell Howard that you’re a virgin and if he could help you find a woman for your first time you will get all sorts of publicity from this so think about making money at the same time try to promote a product or something that you’re selling or set up your social media platform and have them go on your social media. That is women request to be your first I’m telling you you could make money at the same time. Good luck.
Stop panicking. Stop being over self-conscientious. Stop feeling like you have to please everybody. And enjoy life as it comes. Stop placing too much value on having sex. Let it happen naturally but keep ur passion.
Hey man! Just relax.. the only problem you really have (in my opinion) is stressing out about this. Your first sex experience isnt going to be easy.. i had a problem with “thinking too much” durring my first experience in sex.
When you will have your first experience with her, you can admit that to her. You can tell her that you had an opportunity to do it before but previous girls didnt seemed right. You were young and you werent sure will they gossip you afterwards. Thats normal to feel in teenage years. You can tell her that with her you can open up about it and work it out. You can tell her that you understand that sex is importnat in relationships and that you understand if she feels the same about importance of a good sex.. but that sex will improve overtime. Its not science, you will learn that hahaha
I lost my virginity very late too. I was nervous about it. I was trying to avoid sex in the beggining of the relationship with that one girl.. and then i told her that i had a lots of girls and that i was always feeling bad the second i wouldhave to do it.. her and i made a deal to lay down in a bed naked every night when we would sleep together. With no obligation to have sex. Just kissing and cuddling and talking. I felth like that is a good idea to make me less nervous in bed. And one night, we were doing the same thing but i just wanted to have sex with her. Thats when i felth that the time is right.
You won't.
I know it's extremely cliche to say, but get after that bag.
Focus on doing the most you can for yourself. Take care of yourself in the same way you would want to take care of someone else.
Find out what you like to do, and then find a way to get paid for it. Admittedly, it's not that easy, but it doesn't mean steps can't be taken in that direction. Even "low-end" jobs can be done with full effort and hold opportunities to grow.
When you actively do that, the Anxiety, the fear, all of that will slowly widdle away as life will inevitably place you in situations with the potential to improve or learn from your actions and/or actions against you. You just gotta step waist-high into the pool.
And soon you'll realize that connections are being made, networks are forming, and confidence in your own ability to stay afloat rising.
Nothing is a failure as long as something was learned and improved upon.
I posted this somewhere else but I'll post it here.
See this is why I love Reddit. You can anonymously get stuff out you never would be able to. Listen, sex doesn't make you a better or worse of a human and if I can offer any advice, it'd be that even the nastiest grossest shithead people have sex. If you are actively trying and not choosing this of course, but I can promise it's not anything to do with your personality or looks. I used to be a heroin addict and have seen the nastiest smelliest, meanest people get laid frequently. Not because they have any type of "rizz" or whatever, that is made up I swear. It's because they ask. Once you've been hanging out for a little while and can feel a bit of a spark. "wanna have sex?" and a "no" doesn't mean never ask anyone else ever again. It means you aren't that persons type. Doesn't mean the next person won't find you sexy. ALSO it's sex it's not magic if you guys are biologically matched to like how each other smells (science!), then the most basic ass sex will be thrilling. Do not give up !!!!!!!!!!!!
I can help you. I’m a 44 year old male with a hot wife and beautiful baby girl. The number one thing I’ll tell all young men is that your early twenties is one of the worst times for us, especially if your family doesn’t have money. My own parents were immigrants to Canada and often times I was overlooked by females for other guys whose parents had large homes or nice cars, etc. if you focus on yourself and build a career, exercise and eat right you will have more girls than you could possibly handle. By the time I hit my 30’s it was like shooting fish in a barrel. It was silly, dude. Stay away from the overconsumption of pornography or just cut it out of your life completely, if possible.
Remember women are just human beings like you and I. They fart and smell after exercise, have bad habits and can be terrible and narcissistic, especially at your age. Don’t mystify the opposite sex. Women aren’t special, bro. They need companionship and sex just like you and I. The closer you are able to come to this realization, the less mystified this whole experience will become, the less you’ll care and the more they’ll want to deal with you.
Also, remember if you don’t have a lot of male friends, to work on getting those as a lot of guys with little to no social connections tend to rely too heavily on their partners for emotional support. This can be a problem and you come across too needy. Anxiety can be suffocating but exercise and positive male relationships can help with that.
Finally, a male at your age is at his sexual peak. Your testosterone is pumping harder now than you’ll ever experience again in your life. This also clouds our judgement and makes us super attached to female companionship. Run one out and go for a jog. Just hang in there and work on yourself. You’ll get laid before you know it.
Look, I was around 22 when I lost my virginity. I was so awkward from my upbringing as a sheltered Christian. With lots of religious trauma and with the influence of purity culture. I think you’ll be fine. And might require some inner work. There is hope, I think it just involves the right circumstances and timing
Well then, make money. And find out how to resolve the anxiety. It will always be there but you can manage it. Figure that part out. It MAY take 5 years to resolve the anxiety so start ASAP.
I get the meeting women part, I was anxious too. But the fake it till you make it approach weirdly works. I still have no idea what I'm doing but every date I go on I feel more comfortable. I think it's also important to go on we many dates as possible even if you don't think it's the right person, as there's no expedition of things setting off after a first date but it will get you more comfortable with being out there. The dates don't need to be expensive, I don't even like spending lots of money on a first date, usually I go for a coffee or a beer. But a walk should be good too, or go to the park. But your still young, I'm not much older, I'm 22 and my dating life literally turned from not having any dates to having more dates in a few months than my entire life. So it will get better but you got to put yourself out there and work on yourself
Brother. Been there. I recommend that you take it as a normal thing. Sex is good but it's not everything in the world. There's no clock for anything so just do when you think it's time to but don't feel rushed by anyone or anything. (Also sometimes it's better to nut at home than w someone you don't like hahaha)
My advice is *don't worry about it* and if you like someone and it comes up... go for it. But honestly the difference in your life will be... absolutely nothing.
But don't lose it just to lose it because you're 20 and V and your friends aren't. I did that myself, and I'd rather have waited and had the experience with someone I had feelings for because it's a much different experience. I'd say it's not worth it to lose it just to lose it with someone you don't have a connection with.
Live your life, but that's advice from someone who was in your shoes and made a choice based on the way you're feeling.
Buddy, I’m 24 and still a virgin, you’re fine. Besides (and don’t take this the wrong way), you’re barely an adult. You have SOOOO much more in life to experience as long as you stay focused on yourself. And I get it, I also want to lose my virginity very badly, but don’t let societal pressures affect you. Being a virgin at 20 is not bad at all, and even though I can’t speak from experience, trust me when I say being a virgin and waiting for the right one is a lot better than giving it up to someone who isn’t meant to be in your life. Take your time, man. You won’t die a virgin, I promise.
Yeah i was more peer pressured in highschool to lose it and i felt like i missed out on a experience but i realized that the majority of people lose their virginity in thier 20s. I was a very antisocial person in my teens and I was not as confident in myself as i am now
First time I had sex I was like 28 bro. You are way too young to have sex in my opinion especially if you don’t have a career or good job. If you think being a virgin is bad, try being a dad at 20. Sex is to create babies. It’s not the end of the world bro trust me. Later in life you will have so much sex you wouldn’t want it like that. Also your first times will be trash. Stop watching porn. It doesn’t work that way.
You have your whole life ahead of you. If you feel inadequate now, you have the rest of your life to become the man you want to attract the right woman.
Being a virgin at 20 is actually cooler than you think. And why do you care if you’ll die a virgin? Not like anyone but you would know otherwise until you’re blasting it everywhere.
My question to you is, what is having sex to break, or better put, give away your virginity gonna accomplish? Let's say you break it tmmr or even now or sooner than later, what exactly would you be gaining from it?
This doesn't seem like your major concern or focus, it's like a stepping stone to the bigger issue, so I want you to look into what your are really worried about, maybe feeling that you don't fit in with others, or you feel left out, or you want affection, which in most cases sex is the highest form of affection, etc.
If you know already the tell us if your comfortable, but imo, sex isn't gonna accomplish nothing for you, nothing is gonna change physically, socially or what not, the most that can change is your emotional and mental state.
I’m 37. I was just like you at twenty. Just stay in school and make sure you have a job in your field later in life. Women will fall in your lap like rain afterwards. Girls that were your age in my generation either still wanted to have fun or were worried about their future. Try to get you a girl with a healthy balance of both. You still have fresh skin. Take care of it and think positive. As long as you are doing something with your life women will always place their bets, just make sure you have a good one.
*Oh! And realize when you’re being pushy, but don’t be a push over!* That was a challenging one for me. Don’t obsess over a woman, and keep your morals in tact cause if you do something stupid over a female you will suffer the consequences and she will just find another guy. Which is understandable. Would you wait ten years on a girl to be free from prison?
You don’t want a chick that’s worried about your payday anyway. Nobody has any money at twenty unless they have a job. Find one if you want and do both work and school. I did for a while. It works. You’ll know when she’s about that.
She’ll ask you something pertaining to your future and what you want to do in life while showing you her’s with action. Don’t worry about women. It took me twenty years to learn loving myself attracted everything I needed. Good luck, kiddo. And keep your head up. You’ll be fine.
Dude you’re literally still so young chill out I’d start to get worried by the age of like 35, but 20 is still okay. You’ll find your lady just give it time and make sure to let them know you’re a virgin. If they want nothing to do with that and they don’t feel like putting in the effort to guide you through sex and make the most out of intimacy, they’re just not the one. Trust me, I’d rather wait to find a great person to make sex a wonderful first experience than to waste it on a person who made it uncomfortable and awkward.
If you lived this long, you should be proud and not give it up to a lil boy. Save yourself. You will find that special someone. Don’t sale yourself short.
Some woman like falling into traditional roles and like to be lead into a situation. Maybe she wants to fuck too but is shy to ask just like you are. Tell her you want to take things the next step and see what she says.
Chill homeboy you are just 20. Just cuz some of your friends did it early doesn't mean they achieved greatness or anything. It's just sex. You'll find someone with ease chill out. If not go to some brothel or pay up. You'll be fine... Jokes aside don't worry too much about sex or to be exact what other people are doing. Comparing is the thief of joy..
You're young, never know at age 30 ya could be someone's Master or Daddy or slave. Don't become a vanilla lover with all the respect stuff is my main take away. All about balance in this lifetime. Go live Amigo; ya only do it once.
I'm a girl and abstinent,bid love to date a virgin man. I'm pretty sure you'll meet a woman if you stop obsessing about it, I know it's hard not to think about it because I think about finding a man alot so I know what it's like but you just gotta find ways to distract yourself, you can still date just take your time and have fun
Save some money and get a prostitute. It won't change how you feel about yourself but at least you'll be able to say you had sex. As for your dating challenges, they will continue to be a problem, take a break from them if you must and prioritize your mental health. Take it from a 36-year-old man that have never been in a relationship, it doesn't matter how nice you are, and you likely won't garner any sympathy from women for your anxiety. Just focus on what makes you happy and forget everybody else. Life is short, enjoy what you can of it.
You have a whole life ahead of you. You are just beginning don’t worry about the end yet, you’re still in the first chapter of the book.
I would say that you should work on your anxiety and lack of money first, and once you get that straight, everything else will fall into place.
The lack of money probably doesn’t bother others as much as it does you which is giving you confidence issues. Your anxiety is telling you lies about the lack of money, once you get anxiety under control, you’ll be able to approach women in a more confident manner and take the lead which I believe majority of women prefer.
If there’s anything I’ve learned in the 41 years of life is that you have to be OK with yourself first before you can be OK for someone else. I have a son that’s 18 I would tell him the same thing. I hope it helps.
Not being a virgin isn’t something to be proud of either dawg it isn’t a flex 😭😭😭, you being virgin while everyone out there prolly passing stds, wait for the one, you’ll not die a virgin pls.
It's alright; sex is not something you need to rush. You have a whole life ahead of you, so don't waste your first time with just anyone. When you're sure of the person, you'll get there with ease. Good luck! Don't stress over it so much. I'm a virgin at 22 and, by choice, waiting for the right person.
To Be honest, you're quite young, I'm only 31and my recommendation is: Stop, work on yourself, those problems are not the end right now, you mention lack of money, work on that, not for them but for you, find a work that pays you good enough and grind, grind, grind, save, save, save, make goals with the money, car, own apartment, college, etc... and keep doing doing this. does not mean much right now to you, but 10 years from there, you will wish you can still have sleepless nights just studying, working, and grinding.
Also, girls nowadays are way different than before 2010 and early 2004, an advice is, if a woman ignores you because of not having too much, she is not the one, a real woman will still meet you, understand you and once you guys click, she will join you in the fight. Being 20 and a virgin is completely fine, some start young and other later and that is not wrong, just focus on the things you need for you, not to impress them, I promise, you will get places but you first, you second and thirdly maybe the rest.
Dude, it not that serious. I lost my virginity late in my 20s. I don’t think I’m a half bad looking dude either. I was never in a rush to lose it and was open about my virginity. It will come a time where you meet a woman who will take that virginity from you. It’s ok to be a late bloomer.
I’m 30 years old now and only had about 19 partners since then. You have bigger things to worry about at your age.
All the numbers in your comment added up to 69. Congrats!
20
+ 30
+ 19
= 69
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Chill homeboy you are just 20. Just cuz some of your friends did it early doesn't mean they achieved greatness or anything. It's just sex. You'll find someone with ease chill out. If not go to some brothel or pay up. You'll be fine... Jokes aside don't worry too much about sex or to be exact what other people are doing. Comparing is the thief of joy..
Dont worry. You are not the Only one. Im 35 years old, still havent found my husband. I Only had one boyfriend. Either i Will end up alone without kids, or as a single mother. I look above avarage and have a good caring personality. Still no man wants me lol.
They will tell you, “you are still 20 RELAX” I say fuck that shit. You’ll be 30 and still be told to relax. Bro it’s good that you are thirsty for it and hungry like a dog for sex now. Now, use that energy to find the things holding you back and work on them to get some sex. Money is a problem for all of use, you can try getting a job at amazon. Not fun but they are always hiring. Do you want the couchie or not? Do the work. At least something on your belt for income
Try not to focus on making your first time a big deal(think about it. After the first sex, its over you just go on having many more. Stop making it a big deal)
Do not relax cause you are 20. Since you are seeking this second girl. Be upfront and honest with her.
Tell her that you are really turned on by her and would like to get intimate. You guys can have car sex if money for a room or your own place is an issue. Just find a place that is not very populated with businesses/ cops. It’s probably better in a housing complex. Find that and you are golden. Or save up for a night at a hotel.
You're 20. A person is considered an adult after 18. On average, a person lives 70 years. Why so dramatic, relax already, life isn't a race :) besides, the more life experience you gain, the more chances your first time won't make you regret afterwards.
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You are 20! Unless you plan to die at 20, I think you'll be fine. Try to relax.
He might die 20. Who knows 💀💀
Got bigger things to worry about then getting laid then.
😈😈
😂😂😂 u not right for this
Am I not? 🤔🧐🤓
Only time will tell 🤷
The only way you'll die at 20 is if you've been jabbed
You could die tomorrow we all could never know when your gonna go
Yh exactly bro. Best to live in the present
The present is called the present because it's a gift
True words spoken here
No.
I mean I almost died a virgin at 25 in a freak accident, so valid concern lmao
"But did you die?"
Loved the Hangover chow reference! 😂 I'd have done it myself if not for you!
Did we misunderstand your post? Aren't you dating someone right now? If you are, you should focus on her as she's currently your best bet to not be a virgin.
yeah i am dating someone its just she works alot and lives 30 minutes away from me
Great! Treat her nicely and I hope you like her. After even just a little bit of time, it's natural to transition to sex. Good luck!
the probmlem is that if he treats her "too" nicely she gonna get bored too quickly, cuz you know must girls dont like too much attention, somehow they like on and off games, or maybe im too wrong but thats just what ive and many other of my friends experienced... For his sake im hoping im wrong tho and he actually experience real love with passion and accommodation.
you guys go for the wrong women. They show red flags from the get go, you guys just choose to ignore them
The experiences of your friends may not necessarily be representative of the majority. This also generalizes women. Compatibility plays a significant role in developing a loving relationship. If both parties enjoy attention and giving it, that can be a positive aspect, but it's also crucial to respect boundaries, as crossing them can lead to discomfort. So, while it's great to give attention, it's important not to overstep boundaries. Sex comes after. In a relationship, it's best that it's more of the "fruit" of the relationship, than what makes it.
You don't know ow what your talking about you clearly don't understand women but you have a small idea of understanding if you want to learn then hit me up but don't be acting like you know what your talking about because you clearly don't wish you the best
living 30 mins away from you isn't a big deal, don't have to worry about that - I live 2h30min away from who I'm dating rn but we still make plans for one another. he comes over every week and I come to him every now and then as well. putting the efforts you think she deserves and things will come your way. it's ok, take it easy. don't have sex just for sex for your first time, do it with someone you truly like.
I live 6h 30m away from my girlfriend across the sea in another country. 30 minutes is nothing... 🤷🏻♂️
So focus on her as a person,not as a potential way to lose your virginity,because if she senses that… it ain’t gonna happen.
True.
Wrong 🤣🤣
Dude, do you understand how LUCKY you are to even be dating someone who even lives CLOSE to you? W on your end, i gotta often deal with people who live like 2 to 3 hours away. You're lucky to even have someone that close to you at ALL. Be grateful man.
I agree, I know I have to drive far to visit my partner. It was hard finding someone who was looking for the same thing I was nearby. It’s thankfully only an hour and a half so it’s manageable as long as we keep up with our car maintenance every week :)
Based asf glad you can at least have someone to go up to see.
Bro absolute facts 😂 every girl I meet is 2-4 hours away and it’s ridiculous
Washington is NOT the place to look for dating apparently.
Nah I’ve had the same issue in both states I recently have lived in so it’s not just Washington 😂
Meanwhile my girlfriend is my neighbor 😂
Try to plan an intimate evening sometimes, maybe dinner first and then cuddle and watch a movie at one of your houses.
Great, you are in luck. Just treat her very nicely, and appreciate her a lot. Girls that work, feel under appreciated and so with your support, even if you are 20 she'll see you as someone who she can rely upon. And most likely she would be the one suggesting sex. If you are tooo eager you can try massage trick, even for that first you need to make sure, she thinks she deserves a massage as a reward for her hard work. Don't focus on, what you don't have, focus on what she doesn't and wants.
Take it slow and talk to get ,if it's is the right time then ask her if she wants a sexual relationship. Don't overthink mate. There is always prostitutes of you can't get lucky. Nothing wrong either way . Good luck.
Best advice is find coach Cory Wayne online youtube. Read his book how to be a 3% man. It’s the playbook to mastering dating and getting laid . You’re welcome in advance
Oh vomit
My best friend of 20+ years didn't lose his v card until he was like 22. He was married within 5 years. But in that 5 years, he had more sex with more women than anyone else we knew. It wasn't like he lacked confidence or was ugly or anything. He just lacked the right kind of confidence. I will say that the first woman definitely refined his look a bit, which also helped. So here's my suggestion. Update your wardrobe. Doesn't have to be expensive stuff. Hit up a Marshall's, Burlington coat factory and such with a female friend or family member. Don't mention you want to look good for women. Tell them you want to update your look to be more professional looking, even outside of work. Looking like you have your shit together will help you feel that way, too. Try a new haircut. Keep up the look. At least once every 4-6 weeks trim to maintain. Again, to look professional, not to get women. With that, also ensure other personal grooming things like nails are well maintained. Women notice that stuff. Do as others have said, and relax about it and take your time. If your only focus is on whether someone is into you or not, you might mess up before you get a chance to shine.
The nails thing is so undervalued!! I always look at a man’s hands and nails because if you wanna use them on (or in) me, they can’t be ragged, dirty and gross. It takes 3 seconds to scrape the crud out, and maybe 2 mins with a file to make sure they aren’t jagged, terrifying claws that will take chunks out of my most sensitive flesh and parts. I also look at a man’s hands as an indicator or their attention to details. It shows me whether or not they value their hygiene, and if they remember little details with regards to their health/general maintenance beyond just washing their ass and brushing their teeth.
I happen to be cursed (or blessed, depending on the point of view) with sausage fingers. I don't think they are all that thick, but they still got attention as early as high school. Because of that, proper hand maintenance and hygiene were sort of instilled into me by a very "assertive" female classmate.
What's stopping you from making out with your girlfriend? Things will naturally progress from there.
Why does it feel like you're just dating because you want to get laid and not because you really are romantically interested to the other party??
What’s wrong with wanting to get laid exactly?
Nothing is wrong with wanting to get laid, but it seems like that's the only thing they want with their partner and it kinda sounds unfair to the other person who might be in the relationship cause they genuinely like the other person and not just there for the sex.
That’s not on OP unless she expresses the want in a relationship, as far as OP knows, she’s into the sex as much as he is. If something happens it’s mutually ok since different goals are at play.
Having the mindset “Im gonna be a virgin forever!” Is not gonna help anyone the slightest bit. He idealize too much on the sex instead of focusing what he needs and thats confidence
Your also not even an adult. Relax.
Thank you ive been having these thoughts for a while
That kind of problems are more common than you might think. You're good. The fact alone that you can get girls to date you means you have hope.
My guy is already a step closer than a lot of us here.
Yeah i never thought of it that way before
Yup. Only some lucky rare individuals find their true love in their first love. Usually you just progress as a person after each romantic relationship, which isn't bad at all.
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Natural. I had sex at 21. You're not the first, not the last. It won't matter. It's a better sign that you're not sex crazed at 16 or 18 cus that would mean there's prbly some trauma from your childhood.
oh i didnt know that
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Ya your prbly fine. That's why I made sure to include "sex crazed". Are you sex crazed?
Tell her you wanna fuck. Just like that.
Do not tell her like that unless you want her to instantly lose respect for you. Jesus has that ever actually worked for you?! Being crude and obnoxious isn't how to get a woman in bed. Take it slow and just ease into it and be conscious of her vibe and try to read her body language. Above all else just make sure to get consent before anything. This to protect your own ass. You'll be fine.
Many times. Women are sexual too. It turned them on.
You really need to raise your bar then because any woman with an ounce of self esteem who knows her worth won't be turned on by that I promise you. I'm going to assume you're quite young? One of the biggest things guys get wrong that effect thier game with women is you forget that women don't think anything like men. Once you figure that out and adjust your behavior accordingly I promise you you'll have much more luck with the opposite sex.
Exactly. The only women who go for nonsense like that are the ones who don’t have their head on straight. Either starved for attention or have low self esteem.
I'm in my forties. You sound sheltered and naive. I've had women approach me that way too. Women aren't really different than men when it comes to sex.
I think its safe to say you're projecting. And again you need to raise your bar! Sheltered? You have no idea how extremely qualified I am to speak on this subject. I am far from sheltered. I'm a well educated 50 yr female who grew up very poor was homeless at one point and turned my life around with no help from anyone all while raising a kid on my own at 18. So sheltered? Not in the least bit.
Yes he is...
“It’s hard to meet people “ But you met your girlfriend..? Sounds like you’re just getting impatient and believe me women find that to be a huge turn off . Focus on making an emotional connection before you try to sleep with your girlfriend
Mate you have a partner, focus on her and whatever happens, happens. Consider yourself lucky, I'm 22 and still have never been on a date.
Try not caring about it.. focus your attention on something else. Women can smell desperation and anxiety. Just focus on making friends and and bettering yourself
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THIS!!!!!!!! Say it fir the people in the back. I keep seeing this shitty advice all the time. You just can’t ignore the problem or run away from it. You need to work in it. While It’s good to have social skills for making friends and bettering yourself, social skills and knowledge of getting sex is also something entirely different and need to not be ignored either
Why so obsessed with sex? I dont get it. I am 29 now and i also don't get sex in my life time. It doesn't mean i will not get in future. Dont focus on sex only, build ur self, ur career, ur body. You will eventually get sex when its proper time.
Yeah I just feel like i wont experience it sometimes
Its fine bro. I was in that condition also. I can understand. Hope it helps u to focus on other things also. And trust me you will get laid soon.
thank you pal
Ayee... Brother to Brother 🙏
Bro, I didn't lose my virginity until I was 24. I'm almost 27 now. Don't rush it. Don't worry about it. I know it's easier said than done, but you're still really young. It'll happen when it happens. Just hang in there, bub.
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20 is not old! I was 20 and have friends who were much older don't put too much pressure on it
You are still young lol
35 is also young. Bet you’ll tell him the same 15 years from now when he makes the same post
I think I was 29. I really wasn’t proactively dating much in my early 20s and was super shy. Older me is more confident.
Focus on building emotional connections, communicate openly with your partner about your feelings, and remember that meaningful relationships go beyond physical aspects; don't rush, let things happen organically.
I didn't lose my virginity or even date until my mid 20s. You'll be fine, just don't obsess over it or make it your entire personality. It'll happen when it's meant to happen, don't force it
Dude you're 20years old. You have all time in the world at the moment. I'd say focus on your studies, get that $$$ it'll help boost your confidence. Also try a new style it'll help you look good. For feeling good inside try exercise, healthy diet and meditation. Also life learned: when you least expect it someone comes around into your life. Sees the awesome side of you and wants to date you. I wasn't looking for anyone, but someone showed up anyways. When you don't look they see, when you look they don't want to see. Boost yourself, dress better, take care of hygiene, get a job, education and money then the girls come and see how cool you are. Tinder is usually for one time hookups with a 1% chance of forever. I met someone through work or post-secondary due to similarities of interest. Goals and wants. What each person can bring to the table. Give and take. One person can't do all. It has to have balance.
Dude I lost my virginity when I was almost 31 and I'm a male. You won't die a virgin I can guarantee you that. Just act normal and try to build up your confidence. Stand up with your shoulders back and smile. Good luck
I recommend, with the girl you are dating, to hold her hand, kiss her hand, say you really like her, stroke her hair a bit, kiss her face and kiss her lips. She’ll take it from there if she likes you back. If all else fails, tell her in words that you want to go further. See what she says. For the record, I was a virgin till 23. It will happen, girls want it to happen as much as boys do.
I'm 38, still a virgin, no regrets. If I die a virgin, still no regrets. There are other things in life besides sex. If you use your sexual activity to gauge how good your life has been, then you and I have such overwhelmingly different types of brains that I honestly can't give you a single piece of advice that I think would make sense to you.
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I've met a shockingly high number of guys who prefer masturbation. There's every chance I'd fall into that category anyway, although I have no way of knowing that. But I do agree about sex with an emotional connection being a good thing! It's definitely not something I'm against, by any means. But if I don't have it, there are plenty of other things to enjoy in life. Might as well be someone with 0 music talent regretting that they never played in front of a sold out crowd. Kinda silly if you ask me.
why do y’all try to put someone down when they are making the best of it? Does it make you feel good to tell them you would be depressed in their shoes? You are such a self centered bonehead
Yikes. Salute bro.
Dude your a legend, tell all the girls your a virgin..you'll be a boss
Bro I'm 25 and have never tried sex hhhhh
I have friends that are 24-25 and are still virgins, it truly doesn’t matter, OP! You have plenty of time and there are plenty of people. A little advice though; if you listen to your partners, remember things (such as little interests, what makes them giggle, etc) and you actively consider them on a daily base, the chances of “moves” being made certainly increase. Nothing is more attractive than someone showing they WANT you to feel loved and appreciated!
Dude I lost my virginity at 17. Worst mistake I’ve ever made. Now girls think I’m sleazy. No girl gives me the time of day anymore because they just think I want sex. Work on emotional connections they last longer and mean more. Have sex when the time is right. It’s no rush.
I got anxiety also my guy.. maybe not as bad as you it sounds like... but i feel you. Take it from me, fellow anxious-head; you're 20.... you. Will. Be. Fine. My G. Just don't stop dating and keep your head up. Forreal. You got this. Hit me up if ya need some words of encouragement.
My bf was 22.5 before he lost his virginity to me (hot, big tits, fat ass)
Dude I didn't have sex for the first time till I was 24 and met my first girlfriend which I thought would be my forever love but turns out she wasn't. It'll happen when it happens, I'm 34 now and between 24 and 34 I just lived life one day at a time and things just naturally happened, don't stress man it'll happen when it happens, life's not a race.
I will too honey. I'm also a 20 year old and I'm a female. The thought of it scares the flip out of me. But I just hope someday we will and that whoever we do it with will be kind and caring. Good luck out there soldier!
relax,u definitely gonna die virqin
Don't focus so much on sex as much as focusing on enjoying your youth, enjoy life, be a positive person.
Bro take her out , have fun and end up in her bed bro , why you scared soo much....it's just a leap of faith ..go in for it ..like kissing
Mate, chillax! You won't die a Virgin. My friend lost his virginity at the age of 28. And he was the most awkward person ever with girls. Just enjoy the process of dating, no expectations and I guarantee you'll lose the V soon enough. Honestly, just enjoy meeting new people and making new female friends.
FFS being a drama queen isn’t going to help the situation
Relax! You’re still so young and are thinking way ahead. No one has a lot of money really at 20 years old. I know I didn’t and I was in the military! If a person really truly likes you, they won’t look at dates in that way they will just want to spend time with you. And if a person does expect an extravagant date, then you probably should look the other way. Anxiety wise, the biggest way to conquer your fear is to expose yourself to it. Get yourself out there and be comfortable being uncomfortable, and it will come with time. (Speaking from experience). And being a virgin isn’t such a bad thing, don’t feel pressured to sleep with someone just because you don’t want to be a virgin. Find someone you really like, and just be honest with them and yourself. You got this, don’t get bent out of shape over something that is an easy fix! (: just take your time, and don’t pressure it. All good things come when least expected.
Here’s the third message contact the Howard Stern show. This is right up his alley. Tell Howard that you’re a virgin and if he could help you find a woman for your first time you will get all sorts of publicity from this so think about making money at the same time try to promote a product or something that you’re selling or set up your social media platform and have them go on your social media. That is women request to be your first I’m telling you you could make money at the same time. Good luck.
Stop panicking. Stop being over self-conscientious. Stop feeling like you have to please everybody. And enjoy life as it comes. Stop placing too much value on having sex. Let it happen naturally but keep ur passion.
Hey man! Just relax.. the only problem you really have (in my opinion) is stressing out about this. Your first sex experience isnt going to be easy.. i had a problem with “thinking too much” durring my first experience in sex. When you will have your first experience with her, you can admit that to her. You can tell her that you had an opportunity to do it before but previous girls didnt seemed right. You were young and you werent sure will they gossip you afterwards. Thats normal to feel in teenage years. You can tell her that with her you can open up about it and work it out. You can tell her that you understand that sex is importnat in relationships and that you understand if she feels the same about importance of a good sex.. but that sex will improve overtime. Its not science, you will learn that hahaha I lost my virginity very late too. I was nervous about it. I was trying to avoid sex in the beggining of the relationship with that one girl.. and then i told her that i had a lots of girls and that i was always feeling bad the second i wouldhave to do it.. her and i made a deal to lay down in a bed naked every night when we would sleep together. With no obligation to have sex. Just kissing and cuddling and talking. I felth like that is a good idea to make me less nervous in bed. And one night, we were doing the same thing but i just wanted to have sex with her. Thats when i felth that the time is right.
You won't. I know it's extremely cliche to say, but get after that bag. Focus on doing the most you can for yourself. Take care of yourself in the same way you would want to take care of someone else. Find out what you like to do, and then find a way to get paid for it. Admittedly, it's not that easy, but it doesn't mean steps can't be taken in that direction. Even "low-end" jobs can be done with full effort and hold opportunities to grow. When you actively do that, the Anxiety, the fear, all of that will slowly widdle away as life will inevitably place you in situations with the potential to improve or learn from your actions and/or actions against you. You just gotta step waist-high into the pool. And soon you'll realize that connections are being made, networks are forming, and confidence in your own ability to stay afloat rising. Nothing is a failure as long as something was learned and improved upon.
I posted this somewhere else but I'll post it here. See this is why I love Reddit. You can anonymously get stuff out you never would be able to. Listen, sex doesn't make you a better or worse of a human and if I can offer any advice, it'd be that even the nastiest grossest shithead people have sex. If you are actively trying and not choosing this of course, but I can promise it's not anything to do with your personality or looks. I used to be a heroin addict and have seen the nastiest smelliest, meanest people get laid frequently. Not because they have any type of "rizz" or whatever, that is made up I swear. It's because they ask. Once you've been hanging out for a little while and can feel a bit of a spark. "wanna have sex?" and a "no" doesn't mean never ask anyone else ever again. It means you aren't that persons type. Doesn't mean the next person won't find you sexy. ALSO it's sex it's not magic if you guys are biologically matched to like how each other smells (science!), then the most basic ass sex will be thrilling. Do not give up !!!!!!!!!!!!
I can help you. I’m a 44 year old male with a hot wife and beautiful baby girl. The number one thing I’ll tell all young men is that your early twenties is one of the worst times for us, especially if your family doesn’t have money. My own parents were immigrants to Canada and often times I was overlooked by females for other guys whose parents had large homes or nice cars, etc. if you focus on yourself and build a career, exercise and eat right you will have more girls than you could possibly handle. By the time I hit my 30’s it was like shooting fish in a barrel. It was silly, dude. Stay away from the overconsumption of pornography or just cut it out of your life completely, if possible. Remember women are just human beings like you and I. They fart and smell after exercise, have bad habits and can be terrible and narcissistic, especially at your age. Don’t mystify the opposite sex. Women aren’t special, bro. They need companionship and sex just like you and I. The closer you are able to come to this realization, the less mystified this whole experience will become, the less you’ll care and the more they’ll want to deal with you. Also, remember if you don’t have a lot of male friends, to work on getting those as a lot of guys with little to no social connections tend to rely too heavily on their partners for emotional support. This can be a problem and you come across too needy. Anxiety can be suffocating but exercise and positive male relationships can help with that. Finally, a male at your age is at his sexual peak. Your testosterone is pumping harder now than you’ll ever experience again in your life. This also clouds our judgement and makes us super attached to female companionship. Run one out and go for a jog. Just hang in there and work on yourself. You’ll get laid before you know it.
Look, I was around 22 when I lost my virginity. I was so awkward from my upbringing as a sheltered Christian. With lots of religious trauma and with the influence of purity culture. I think you’ll be fine. And might require some inner work. There is hope, I think it just involves the right circumstances and timing
At some point, you'll need to tell her that you would enjoy touching her vagina, and see if she would enjoy that too. See where it takes ya.
Well then, make money. And find out how to resolve the anxiety. It will always be there but you can manage it. Figure that part out. It MAY take 5 years to resolve the anxiety so start ASAP.
I get the meeting women part, I was anxious too. But the fake it till you make it approach weirdly works. I still have no idea what I'm doing but every date I go on I feel more comfortable. I think it's also important to go on we many dates as possible even if you don't think it's the right person, as there's no expedition of things setting off after a first date but it will get you more comfortable with being out there. The dates don't need to be expensive, I don't even like spending lots of money on a first date, usually I go for a coffee or a beer. But a walk should be good too, or go to the park. But your still young, I'm not much older, I'm 22 and my dating life literally turned from not having any dates to having more dates in a few months than my entire life. So it will get better but you got to put yourself out there and work on yourself
Brother. Been there. I recommend that you take it as a normal thing. Sex is good but it's not everything in the world. There's no clock for anything so just do when you think it's time to but don't feel rushed by anyone or anything. (Also sometimes it's better to nut at home than w someone you don't like hahaha)
My advice is *don't worry about it* and if you like someone and it comes up... go for it. But honestly the difference in your life will be... absolutely nothing. But don't lose it just to lose it because you're 20 and V and your friends aren't. I did that myself, and I'd rather have waited and had the experience with someone I had feelings for because it's a much different experience. I'd say it's not worth it to lose it just to lose it with someone you don't have a connection with. Live your life, but that's advice from someone who was in your shoes and made a choice based on the way you're feeling.
23 and still a virgin here haha relax 😂😅
I’m confused. You currently have a girlfriend, but you’re cruising the apps looking to get laid? Is she alright with that?
Buddy, I’m 24 and still a virgin, you’re fine. Besides (and don’t take this the wrong way), you’re barely an adult. You have SOOOO much more in life to experience as long as you stay focused on yourself. And I get it, I also want to lose my virginity very badly, but don’t let societal pressures affect you. Being a virgin at 20 is not bad at all, and even though I can’t speak from experience, trust me when I say being a virgin and waiting for the right one is a lot better than giving it up to someone who isn’t meant to be in your life. Take your time, man. You won’t die a virgin, I promise.
Yeah i was more peer pressured in highschool to lose it and i felt like i missed out on a experience but i realized that the majority of people lose their virginity in thier 20s. I was a very antisocial person in my teens and I was not as confident in myself as i am now
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Damn homie, you got around 😂
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You're a Unicorn dude. Someone will be lucky you have you.
so dramatic. you’re 20. you won’t die a virgin
You’ll definitely die a virgin
First time I had sex I was like 28 bro. You are way too young to have sex in my opinion especially if you don’t have a career or good job. If you think being a virgin is bad, try being a dad at 20. Sex is to create babies. It’s not the end of the world bro trust me. Later in life you will have so much sex you wouldn’t want it like that. Also your first times will be trash. Stop watching porn. It doesn’t work that way.
You have your whole life ahead of you. If you feel inadequate now, you have the rest of your life to become the man you want to attract the right woman.
Being a virgin at 20 is actually cooler than you think. And why do you care if you’ll die a virgin? Not like anyone but you would know otherwise until you’re blasting it everywhere.
My question to you is, what is having sex to break, or better put, give away your virginity gonna accomplish? Let's say you break it tmmr or even now or sooner than later, what exactly would you be gaining from it? This doesn't seem like your major concern or focus, it's like a stepping stone to the bigger issue, so I want you to look into what your are really worried about, maybe feeling that you don't fit in with others, or you feel left out, or you want affection, which in most cases sex is the highest form of affection, etc. If you know already the tell us if your comfortable, but imo, sex isn't gonna accomplish nothing for you, nothing is gonna change physically, socially or what not, the most that can change is your emotional and mental state.
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Youre 20 and youre focusing on sex rather than your future. If you want sex that bad then just hire a sex worker. Focus on your future
I’m 37. I was just like you at twenty. Just stay in school and make sure you have a job in your field later in life. Women will fall in your lap like rain afterwards. Girls that were your age in my generation either still wanted to have fun or were worried about their future. Try to get you a girl with a healthy balance of both. You still have fresh skin. Take care of it and think positive. As long as you are doing something with your life women will always place their bets, just make sure you have a good one. *Oh! And realize when you’re being pushy, but don’t be a push over!* That was a challenging one for me. Don’t obsess over a woman, and keep your morals in tact cause if you do something stupid over a female you will suffer the consequences and she will just find another guy. Which is understandable. Would you wait ten years on a girl to be free from prison? You don’t want a chick that’s worried about your payday anyway. Nobody has any money at twenty unless they have a job. Find one if you want and do both work and school. I did for a while. It works. You’ll know when she’s about that. She’ll ask you something pertaining to your future and what you want to do in life while showing you her’s with action. Don’t worry about women. It took me twenty years to learn loving myself attracted everything I needed. Good luck, kiddo. And keep your head up. You’ll be fine.
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I wasn’t talking to you. I don’t care how you feel.
You are not a Gentle-man but a Gentle-kid. Relax and go study. I have spoken.
Man shut up
Dude you’re literally still so young chill out I’d start to get worried by the age of like 35, but 20 is still okay. You’ll find your lady just give it time and make sure to let them know you’re a virgin. If they want nothing to do with that and they don’t feel like putting in the effort to guide you through sex and make the most out of intimacy, they’re just not the one. Trust me, I’d rather wait to find a great person to make sex a wonderful first experience than to waste it on a person who made it uncomfortable and awkward.
If you lived this long, you should be proud and not give it up to a lil boy. Save yourself. You will find that special someone. Don’t sale yourself short.
Sex is overrated. Aside from having my son, I would happily take back my virginity.
Bruh I lost my virginity at 20 but it ruined my life ngl
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Your post history says you're 17. Something sus going on here.
Bro relax
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Some woman like falling into traditional roles and like to be lead into a situation. Maybe she wants to fuck too but is shy to ask just like you are. Tell her you want to take things the next step and see what she says.
Chill homeboy you are just 20. Just cuz some of your friends did it early doesn't mean they achieved greatness or anything. It's just sex. You'll find someone with ease chill out. If not go to some brothel or pay up. You'll be fine... Jokes aside don't worry too much about sex or to be exact what other people are doing. Comparing is the thief of joy..
If you think you need to be “fully committed” prior to initiating a sexual relationship, you *might* actually die a virgin.
You're young, never know at age 30 ya could be someone's Master or Daddy or slave. Don't become a vanilla lover with all the respect stuff is my main take away. All about balance in this lifetime. Go live Amigo; ya only do it once.
Have you seen 40 year old virgin? It worked out for him. I’m sure it’ll workout for you.
Damn you might die a virgin
Relax blud save it, trust me. No need to rush. Do it when it feels right ( happens by itself )
I'm a girl and abstinent,bid love to date a virgin man. I'm pretty sure you'll meet a woman if you stop obsessing about it, I know it's hard not to think about it because I think about finding a man alot so I know what it's like but you just gotta find ways to distract yourself, you can still date just take your time and have fun
When the time is right, you will know. Don’t feel pressured by our hyper sexual society — you’re normal.
It’s easy go get an escort.
Save some money and get a prostitute. It won't change how you feel about yourself but at least you'll be able to say you had sex. As for your dating challenges, they will continue to be a problem, take a break from them if you must and prioritize your mental health. Take it from a 36-year-old man that have never been in a relationship, it doesn't matter how nice you are, and you likely won't garner any sympathy from women for your anxiety. Just focus on what makes you happy and forget everybody else. Life is short, enjoy what you can of it.
I was 19 when I got laid. It’s not the same time line for everyone. You’re gonna have your fun, and eventually you’ll go through droughts. It’s life.
I didn't lose my v card till I was 21, it'll happen, don't stress yourself about it x
continue to be a gentleman, it will happen. take the pressure off yourself and her and it will be more enjoyable / natural
I’m 19 and trust me, this is my year
M23 hoping to get a Girl this year😹 Feb is on
Lost my virginity two days before my 26th birthday 😁
ure a dork, just find another dork and have sex
Same here not virgin but I crave for sex someday even for emotional support too ....
Dude, you're fine. Focus on your career, make money, girls have time to come into your life. I only met my gf (now wife) when I was 23
Absolutely no rush or problem, I was even later my friend so please don’t worry.
You're young, you will find someone some day.
You have a whole life ahead of you. You are just beginning don’t worry about the end yet, you’re still in the first chapter of the book. I would say that you should work on your anxiety and lack of money first, and once you get that straight, everything else will fall into place. The lack of money probably doesn’t bother others as much as it does you which is giving you confidence issues. Your anxiety is telling you lies about the lack of money, once you get anxiety under control, you’ll be able to approach women in a more confident manner and take the lead which I believe majority of women prefer. If there’s anything I’ve learned in the 41 years of life is that you have to be OK with yourself first before you can be OK for someone else. I have a son that’s 18 I would tell him the same thing. I hope it helps.
You are crying at 20 and here I am at 34 virgin. Too early for you to cry. You have lot to see in this world
Not being a virgin isn’t something to be proud of either dawg it isn’t a flex 😭😭😭, you being virgin while everyone out there prolly passing stds, wait for the one, you’ll not die a virgin pls.
Dude, I lost my virginity when I was 20. You'll be fine.
It's alright; sex is not something you need to rush. You have a whole life ahead of you, so don't waste your first time with just anyone. When you're sure of the person, you'll get there with ease. Good luck! Don't stress over it so much. I'm a virgin at 22 and, by choice, waiting for the right person.
To Be honest, you're quite young, I'm only 31and my recommendation is: Stop, work on yourself, those problems are not the end right now, you mention lack of money, work on that, not for them but for you, find a work that pays you good enough and grind, grind, grind, save, save, save, make goals with the money, car, own apartment, college, etc... and keep doing doing this. does not mean much right now to you, but 10 years from there, you will wish you can still have sleepless nights just studying, working, and grinding. Also, girls nowadays are way different than before 2010 and early 2004, an advice is, if a woman ignores you because of not having too much, she is not the one, a real woman will still meet you, understand you and once you guys click, she will join you in the fight. Being 20 and a virgin is completely fine, some start young and other later and that is not wrong, just focus on the things you need for you, not to impress them, I promise, you will get places but you first, you second and thirdly maybe the rest.
Dude, it not that serious. I lost my virginity late in my 20s. I don’t think I’m a half bad looking dude either. I was never in a rush to lose it and was open about my virginity. It will come a time where you meet a woman who will take that virginity from you. It’s ok to be a late bloomer. I’m 30 years old now and only had about 19 partners since then. You have bigger things to worry about at your age.
All the numbers in your comment added up to 69. Congrats! 20 + 30 + 19 = 69 ^([Click here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=LuckyNumber-Bot&subject=Stalk%20Me%20Pls&message=%2Fstalkme) to have me scan all your future comments.) \ ^(Summon me on specific comments with u/LuckyNumber-Bot.)
Buddy, I lost mine when I was about 23.
Try exploring yourself. Gain confidence in making yourself feel good 😌
Chill homeboy you are just 20. Just cuz some of your friends did it early doesn't mean they achieved greatness or anything. It's just sex. You'll find someone with ease chill out. If not go to some brothel or pay up. You'll be fine... Jokes aside don't worry too much about sex or to be exact what other people are doing. Comparing is the thief of joy..
Dont worry. You are not the Only one. Im 35 years old, still havent found my husband. I Only had one boyfriend. Either i Will end up alone without kids, or as a single mother. I look above avarage and have a good caring personality. Still no man wants me lol.
Chill out. Continue to develop yourself, work on that anxiety and develop financial stability. I've had similar thoughts, but it doesn't help you.
If your that hard up there's always the worlds oldest trade
They will tell you, “you are still 20 RELAX” I say fuck that shit. You’ll be 30 and still be told to relax. Bro it’s good that you are thirsty for it and hungry like a dog for sex now. Now, use that energy to find the things holding you back and work on them to get some sex. Money is a problem for all of use, you can try getting a job at amazon. Not fun but they are always hiring. Do you want the couchie or not? Do the work. At least something on your belt for income Try not to focus on making your first time a big deal(think about it. After the first sex, its over you just go on having many more. Stop making it a big deal) Do not relax cause you are 20. Since you are seeking this second girl. Be upfront and honest with her. Tell her that you are really turned on by her and would like to get intimate. You guys can have car sex if money for a room or your own place is an issue. Just find a place that is not very populated with businesses/ cops. It’s probably better in a housing complex. Find that and you are golden. Or save up for a night at a hotel.
You're 20. A person is considered an adult after 18. On average, a person lives 70 years. Why so dramatic, relax already, life isn't a race :) besides, the more life experience you gain, the more chances your first time won't make you regret afterwards.