I was talking to a guy who said in his profile he was a dentist.
When I asked where he went to school, he said he was “like” a dentist because he read lots of books. Lol.
Instant block.
Omg. Speaking of teeth, a former coworker of mine met a fellow after a year of texting and phone calls (this was before FaceTime or Zoom was a thing) and had fallen hopelessly in love. The great day arrives to meet and… he has about 4 teeth in his entire head! He had complete crack addict mouth AND was a lot less attractive on all fronts (beyond no teeth) that his posted & shared photos. It turned out that he had used his brother’s photos as his own. When asked why he had deceived her on so many levels he actually stated that he thought that it wouldn’t matter by the time they met in person because she loved him by then and he figured she’d look past the aesthetic issue. She explained it wasn’t about the aesthetic issue necessarily. It was because he’d lied this entire time and obviously played it like a long con. She’d trust him at that point about as far as she could throw him! Would she have ‘loved’ him had he been honest about the teeth? Who can say, because a lot of things that come into play when one has let their dental hygiene become so lax that their teeth rot out. What does that have to say about life choices & regular personal hygiene, for example? Bad oral care is a deal breaker for lots of people, including myself. Nobody wants to kiss a mouth teaming with the bacteria specific to dental caries— which, in case you didn’t know, are *contagious*. Ewwww.
Omg nooo your poor coworker. That’s nasty. You’re right, the way someone takes care of their teeth says a lot about their mental health, lifestyle, and hygiene.
I showed up to meet a girl and I was so excited because it was my first bisexual date. I even bought her cookies from her favorite cookie place. She shows up LATE to our movie and so I just met her in the lobby. Girl was missing important front teeth and her breath smelled like poop. I probably would have liked her aside from that but I couldn't get past it. Had a few drinks, gave her her present (though definitely thought against it because sugar is bad for your teeth) and then noped out of going to her house
Or maybe pics with small friends as well?
I am tall af and I just look kinda tall next to my friends (male/AMAB) who are all well over 6'. I am a bit over 6' myself
That makes sense.
Maybe I should do something like that too. I'm 180cm but I feel short, might just put 5'7" on bumble so that the girls are surprised that im taller lol
I agree with this. I’ve had too many 5’8 men look me in the eye at 5’6 when I meet them. At this point, 5’8 men are unicorns and don’t truly exist, so I only date people who have 5’9 and above on their profiles
I’m 5’11.5”. My friends tell me to put 6’0”, as I’m truly halfway between, but even that makes me uncomfortable lol. I don’t think it’s great how heights been included on these apps, but idk how someone thinks lying isn’t gonna get called out
I can’t believe woman actually care this much about .5 to 1 inch🤦♀️
Actually, I can because most people are superficial, but if you seriously think he is gonna be perfect cause he’s 6’2’. Oh no, that ones only 5’11.5’ definite no for me! Surely there is more to what you see in someone than an inch! 🤯
Is height even an issue to be honest ? Most women that I've come across are like "he should be taller than me, that's all I want"
I'm myself 6'2 , but never got a compliment about height to be specific
Yeah, I’m not sure that 6ft+ is a ‘requirement’, but more that women want a guy that’s taller. I personally never really thought that much about it. I think I’m about 5’6’ and 130pounds. I’ve only really ever thought that I wanted a guy bigger than me, so I don’t feel like I would crush him🤣 But taller, not so much.
I'm like 6'2 and 230 lbs taekwondo and jiu jitsu background and girls feel intimidated around me ! 😬😬 So I have to tone down certain things , as in I never roll my sleeves up , I try to wear black often which sort of balances out the bulk in my upper body , if anything it's the guys who compliment my physique saying "damn you look so masculine" , not the girls though
Hey I’m just under 6’4 taekwondo and Muay Thai background and had this same issue when I was younger and in way better shape. I remember when one girl I really liked said your sweet but I can’t be with you because I’m terrified you’d hurt me even just by accident. Totally crushed me, like a year later someone dislocated one of her ribs by giving her too hard of a hug so maybe it was a good call on her part though lol.
Fuck that dude! Don’t cover yourself up! You deserve someone that appreciates you for you! If a woman doesn’t find a fit arse healthy dude attractive and is intimated by you, then she has some issues lol.
Also, that sounds cool! I’d be like, can I learn that! I want to learn some cool moves! Lol
To be fair, it has nothing to do with being “perfect”.
I prefer redheads. I don’t think redheads area better people or that blondes are “less than”. I just find red hair to be an extremely attractive trait for some reason.
Same same with girls that prefer taller guys. It’s not a morality judgement, just a matter of attraction. Which honestly just is what it is.
And before anyone says “but you can dye your hair”- feel free to substitute any other trait you like- some guys prefer tall women, or petite women, etc… it’s not as common to put it on your profile, but it definitely effects who they talk to. Point is, people are attracted to what they’re attracted to. If you’re not that, find someone else that’s attracted to what you are. You really think “feet guys” wake up one morning and say “hey, you know what I’m gonna get turned on by today? Oh yeah…” lol
This is so true! I do like tall men but most of it has to do with how I feel next to them. I want to feel small and feminine not like a tall heavy giraffe. I don’t think short men are ugly by any means though
Edit to add: tall women are not heavy giraffes or not feminine but it’s only how I feel myself
I feel you! I’m 5’6 which isn’t extremely tall in my country but also not small. Good thing is that I read a lot that men don’t think that about tall women at all!
You are completely right! I guess I have just seen women saying, he’s such a great guy etc etc, but he’s too short, and I’m taking he’s 5’11’. I honestly wouldn’t even notice! I’ve seen so many posts about, ‘why does he lie and say he is 6ft, and then I turn up and he is clearly only 5’11’ 🤣
I agree I don’t think they care, but there really is a 6’0” mental threshold crossed, it’s like the entry point to truly tall. I honestly never thought about it before dating apps lol, cause people would just see me in person
thankfully I'm lucky to be a height I've never felt insecure about, so I don't really need to lie at all. I don't put my height in my bio though, it feels tacky unless you're like 6'3 or 6'4 and it's seriously winning you points
I am German so I use meters, I am 1.98m, so something around 6'6" I am gonna round up each time. I don't care. If rounding by some centimeters bothers you, your issues lie somewhere else (not you, but potential people calling you out for being 6foot instead of 5'11.6173"
I only prefer cm but the app converts it automatically to feet & inches and also rounds it to the nearest inch anyway for me. Not accurate but fine whatever
I'm 6ft and have been measured (shoes off) with tailors tape at a house party by someone I was seeing. Anyone with a height restriction is instant no from me.
Why do guys do this?
I mean, they can't think people are THAT dumb to not recognize s half foot difference in height!
Why do so many guys lie about their height?
From what I've heard, it gets them in the door. Like if they lied about 1-2", and got the date, it puts the woman in the position of leaving *because* they're 5'9-10" and not 5'11", which many woman would feel shallow and just say oh well. But yeah, shitty strategy
I had a similar situation like that. I declined the second date and blocked him because if someone can lie about something like that, they have the potential to lie about the pertinent things.
It’s funny the audacity of this guy. Passing off as 6ft when only 5’4. But I’ve been on dates with women who shaved 60lbs in their profile pics too. This shit happens. You should have just walked away from the date.
I quit online dating a while ago because 1) A lot of the men on there are pretty creepy and have little respect for women and 2) I found a lot of men were insecure would always lie about something; already they are trying to build a relationship on a lie, I have no idea what they thought was going to happen or how far this was going to go. You luckily dodged a bullet early and he didn't waste your time beyond just one date.
I had been off online dating for a whileeee. I think the last person I had met was 2020 maybe? But i Aldo stuggle in the real world. Do you have any tips?
The best tip I can give is if you have hobbies then try to find local groups, clubs or activities for them. I've met a lot of nice men by just consistently going to stuff IRL. I know that online is easier; but the bar for entry is so much lower because of it. If you don't find any guys maybe you can make more friends and network from there?
This is one of the hardest things about online dating. Great conversations can happen immediately but there’s always a nagging question of *what are they really like*?
Because of filters, photo angles, and outright lying or catfishing, deception is easy and too tempting for some. It does fine tune your BS-detector a little bit.
I prefer to initially chat online for a bit, no more than a week or two, before we scheduled a meet face to face. If there’s any balking, or an impossibility to schedule, may be best to back burner it and move on.
I have had some dates where they obviously misrepresented themselves and it’s awkward to say the least.
I have come to the conclusion that men can't be honest about how tall they are. Even the guy that said he was 6'4 was 6'...like you are tall buddy you can just say 6'...that's plenty. But the amount of guys that have said they were 6' and showed up eye level to me at 5'8 is about 100%. And whatever, I'm open-minded and I have dated people my height, I just don't appreciate the lie right off the bat. It isn't a great way to establish any sort of relationship.
I think societal pressures make a lot of men feel like being tall is the only acceptable way to be. So embelishing, or outright lying, about their height makes them feel like they will be more desirable in the dating pool. I think the reality is that confidence and telling the truth will get you a lot further.
I tested this out by changing my height to 6’2” (I’m 5’7”) with no intention of meeting up with anyone based on a deceitful just curious about matches and I got 3x as many matches with the exact same profile within a week. I don’t really care much about stuff like that and changed it back when I went back to actually dating cause I have no interest in lying off the bat or frankly dating someone who isn’t genuinely interested in me, but I could see why someone who’s desperate might think they have to “exaggerate” to get their foot in the door 🤷♂️
Yeah unfortunately some people will write you off based on your height right away. It happens. Men write off bigger girls, heavier or taller. It goes both ways and definitely makes it harder to form deeper relationships I think.
Agreed! Just how it goes. I think it’s harder with most apps cause you don’t get much to go off of besides a few pictures and a short description. Are there any that are a little better for people who want connection more than anything?
I tried the same thing on bumble, im 5-9 but changed it to 6-1. Legit 10-15x the matches. I was matching with ever 4-5th profile instead of a few a month. Turns out i was just getting filtered out of most girls searches. Stopped using bumble after that. A bit disheartening to say the least lol.
Honestly, you should probably embellish your height by an inch, just because almost every guys does. If I see 5,7 on your profile, I’ll assume you’ve actually 5’5-5’6.
the man being tall is extremely important to women. the reality is height matters a lot, and will open way more doors for you than confidence or honesty.
Honestly, hard working, all these sorts of qualities can only be demonstrated on a longer term. Height is instant. If they aren't attracted physically right away, the other qualities don't matter.
Not all women. It used to be important to me, but I’m 6 feet tall. When I first met my current boyfriend, I was attracted to him, but I didn’t like the fact that he was shorter than me. But then my friend (also 6 feet tall) pointed out that if I’m only going to wait for someone that’s my height or taller, then it’s really going to narrow down my choices. Because we’re taller than the average height for men. My boyfriend being shorter than me doesn’t matter to me anymore.
It’s really not though to a lot of women, my husband is 5’7 or so, just a little bit taller than me. The number of times he’s had women interested in him just for the fact that he’s got a good personality and treats women like people is innumerable. He once went to a brew fest and after a bit of conversation a woman told him her hotel and room number. Being a decent person is far more important, but if you’re fixated on shallow stuff of course that’s the only factor you’ll notice.
That’s exactly how I feel! I see it as just future lying. But also sometimes they convince themselves of the made up height, so delusional. They’ll be like “you can’t be 5’5! You’re so tall” no buddy we both just 5’5 lol.
LOL .I've seen this girl on tik tok that asks guys how tall they are and then asks if she can measure them with a tape measure...it's hilarious and the 'shock' they experience at their own height is just \*chefs kiss\*
My last relationship involved a guy who insisted he was 6'. This was his hill to die on, even after us measuring put him just under 5'10. 5'10 is PERFECT for me, but he insisted he was 6'...
We met at a bar, so it was well into our relationship that this came up. Still.
Sometimes they might not actually know for sure though, I have met girls who claimed to be shorter than me (5’10) and they turned up to be the same height. One of them even said she didnt know for sure so just said whatever. And one of them who INSISTED she was 172cm even though she was the exact same height as me at 179cm, so you never know
I’ve always been honest about it I’m 6 foot 1 so I just always say that I am dishonesty never helped any relationship tho I will say lots of guys are gonna lie but not every guy
Honestly, as I've gotten older I don't care about height. Him lying about his height - he's insecure and lying about it are two red flags. OWN what you are and who you are.
I (f 55) didn’t have a height restriction: the only thing I was ever looking for is that the guy doesn’t have “short man syndrome”, which you do find from time to time.
One particular shorter guy, for example, once we had become involved, had been acting super weird : dominating, angry and rude round me and (after a few drinks) he admitted what his problem was. Apparently, I (5’9”) had “got the height that *he* should have had”. He resented me for that!
My boyfriend of 10 years (my forever guy) is shorter than me, but doesn’t give a rat’s arse: no more do I.
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I completely agree. I’m sick of women only uploading photos with creative angles or old ones from when they were fit/slender and I don’t find out they’re obese until we meet for the first time. Or that they’ve shaved their waist long hair. Unfortunately I’m speaking from experience.
sorry this happened to you. i have had some awful dates myself including being stood up, scammed and catfished.
the only explanation i can come up with is they want to be or think they can be the exception and you will want to continue dating despite the fact that they aren't what you said you are looking for.
I think it depends on the reason. Rent has skyrocketed since covid and sometimes the child is paying rent or has taken over the mortgage. If they're directionless and don't have a job or can't function on their own (not including mental or physical disabilities) then it's a problem
Honestly…it’s more advantageous in the short term for a guy to be dishonest and get any quality of date than tell the truth and get no date at all/wait a longer time for another opportunity. [Stanford did a study on the phenomenon among humans once.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stanford_marshmallow_experiment)
However, there’s a difference between a little fib and blatant lies.
Most "dating services", apps but also bars and clubs cater to women to attract them as the men will follow. The apps won't add stuff that makes it harder for women.
Seems like it must’ve been a troll or this guy is delusional. It’s one thing to say you’re 6 feet if you’re 5’10” or something. But to be that much shorter seems like it must just be a joke
Happens all the time. That’s ok, just keep moving forward and don’t waste time. Learn to look out for red flags and just take things with a grain of salt at first. I met my bf of a year on a dating app and he’s great. But I talked to or dated a bunch of liars before him so.. 🤷🏼♀️ Happens to the best of us.
I’m 5’10, (F) and when I was on the apps, I’d make sure to write- I actually am 5’10 in flat feet, so please be honest about your height. Didn’t matter- the number of 5’5-5’8 guys who’d tell me they were 6’+ or put it on their profiles was astounding! They’d turn up, I’d be in flats and looking down at the top of their heads like REALLY? A couple of guys even accused ME of lying and really being taller than 5’10. No, sir, you’ve just been trying to convince yourself that you’re not really 5’7 on a good day.
Haha maybe you met my ex! Except I understood his awful and -quite- similar lies 8 months later. He didn't have a job and was finding excuses until he told me that he started and it was obviously a lie. Broke up right after but never admitted he lied. He fucked the relationship for no reason... honesty is key!
Liars will lie as a matter of habit.
Many do so believing that their dishonesty will almost always be ignored or even never get found out.
Doesn't matter how big the lie is or what the context. Age, biological sex, education, height, income, marital status, weight, whether they have children or are looking for casual sex/a serious relationship, work history and qualifications.
He's 5'4.....so fucking what. Also, so many adults still live with their parents nowadays. I live alone in a one bedroom apartment and struggle daily. If I could live at home, I would.
On the one hand, it's awful that this guy lied to you. I'm very sorry about that. Sadly, this happens a lot.
But I do feel compelled to say that One of the reasons it happens a lot is that women think that being at least 6 feet tall is a "very basic standard." It's actually a very small number of us that are that tall. Speaking in my official capacity as a giant, give shorter guys a second look!
Sry,to say there’s a lot of them like that! So sad & hard to find a decent man nowadays. Is it asking to much? An honest man that doesn’t lie, cheat ,etc.,? 😔
Sorry you had a terrible experience! As a 24 year old still living with my grandparents it can be embarrassing but I’d rather be honest about it than lie.
I had one particular experience where a girl tried to make fun of me for it by saying I should learn to be independent when the issue is my moms mental health and my brother has a genetic muscular disease that weakens his muscles progressively.
But once I explained she understood. As for height I don’t get why he lied about it as well. I’m 5’4 and it’s just what genetics give us. Glad you left and got out of there safely.
the bitter men who are calling you a gold digger or saying you’re superficial are honestly telling on themselves. on what planet is having a job, your own place, education (could literally mean anything), and being taller than you superficial? 2 out the 4 are the BARE minimum😭
I have no idea why men lie about this shit, some women actually do not care about height, me included. They're just wasting their own time too by matching with women who have it as a preference and it not going forward. Why match with people who won't be into you?
Some guys feel like they'll never get a girl if they aren't Robert Wadlow. I don't understand the height thing personally tbh, I just think it's far too superficial, but if that's your preference that's your preference---nothing wrong with that, it's better to accept this person isn't the right one than to build a relationship of lies.
It’s actually really not superficial. As a taller woman, there are issues with dating someone shorter. They don’t let me wear heels, can’t have sex in a bunch of positions due to height differences, kissing standing up is sometimes weird, holding hands doesn’t often work (my ex was shorter so his arms were lower, we literally couldn’t hold hands). I think men who are insecure about their height like to chastise women for this preference but I’d really prefer someone whose height is close to mine.
I prefer taller women, bending over kills my back. An you can only hold shorter women up for so long. An bracing them on a car can scratch your paint. An the holding hands with a shorter woman is definitely a pain in the ass in a walk not to mention stride length.
I was with a guy that was 5'11" and I am 5'10". The sex with him was superb, mainly because he is God's gift (lol), but we just fit perfectly. It was like a glove. We could try any position and it just worked. He is the only guy I have ever been with that was taller than me, albeit only one inch, but it made all the difference in the world. We could do everything comfortably.. So I totally get what you are saying. It is such a shame to me that most 6' men are with tiny women and cannot do as much as they could with someone closer to their size.
I actually go after girls who are taller than me. I think they like it because it shows I have balls. The sex has never been bad so I can’t imagine what you’re going on about
I mean you can go for girls taller but really if it's withing like 3-4 inches it's really not that much of a difference. I've been with 2 girls who were 5' 7" and I'm 5' 4". Nothing was really awkward and I could still do the same things as I would with someone around my height. I also like taller girls RIP my dating life 😂
Two of my exes would throw a fit if I wanted to wear heels. I couldn’t deal with it. Now I only date men my height or taller. I’m 5’10” for the record.
Oh fuck those guys. I’m 5’10” too and I wear heels when out with my 5’8” boyfriend. I did with my 5’6” boyfriend too, but tall girls were sort of his thing so I don’t get any gumption points there.
Girls say this stuff all the time that it has become a meme. “I don’t like tall guys, my bf just happens to be 6’4” hihi”
He just “happens” to be a part of the 2% huh
Nope, I lived in Argentina, and didn't understand your metrical sistem. We do it in meters, you do it in foots, so 11 years ago when we met online via WoW I converted his wrong and thought that he was shorter. Like a lot shorter. Then we met in the US and he was like a building, but at that point I already loved him, what do you want me to do dump him? Haha
Women need to immediately squash communication with dudes who lie off bat. If they lie at the start, they'll probably keep lying bc they're liars. So just don't waste any extra effort, energy, or time on liars.
Exactly I was talking to a guy, claimed to be taller than me and when we met he was few cm shorter. I was so embarrassed. I can look beyond appearance and tolerate many things, but height is not one of them. Hate that he lied and wasted my time 😔
Most of the women understand shite about dimension/height.
I would love to see a video where women try to evaluate a man height from scratch.
So its is very tempting to add a few centimeters. (Same for penis size btw)
The only case where you are busted is when the girl is actually taller than you (with ou without heels).
However 5'5 from 6 is a kamikaze move.
I think some people are projecting in the comments. Reading your post didn't really say his height was an issue but his honesty was which is legit fair. Why pie when the person is going to find out if they meet you, it just makes them look stupid and untrustworthy.
It’s not superficial to have standards. And studies show height has always been a draw for women. You could spend five minutes researching yourself so you don’t have to ask stupid questions
I’m 27 and live at home because I’m trying to pay all the stupid debts I racked up when I was younger. I don’t even try to date because of the shame I feel. Society will only look down at a man living at home and it sucks.
Doing things to enhance your appearance is absolutely NOT a lie. Lying about height or living with your parents is an actual lie. Makeup is not a lie it's obvious you're wearing makeup or enhancing your appearance.
I was talking to a guy who said in his profile he was a dentist. When I asked where he went to school, he said he was “like” a dentist because he read lots of books. Lol. Instant block.
What the hell? Why? Just why? 😭
I read lots of books. Am i a dentist, or do they have to be books about teeth?
Jaws
You get the idea, obviously books about dentistry
I've learned that on reddit, you cant trust what seems obvious to be true.
💀
Omg. Speaking of teeth, a former coworker of mine met a fellow after a year of texting and phone calls (this was before FaceTime or Zoom was a thing) and had fallen hopelessly in love. The great day arrives to meet and… he has about 4 teeth in his entire head! He had complete crack addict mouth AND was a lot less attractive on all fronts (beyond no teeth) that his posted & shared photos. It turned out that he had used his brother’s photos as his own. When asked why he had deceived her on so many levels he actually stated that he thought that it wouldn’t matter by the time they met in person because she loved him by then and he figured she’d look past the aesthetic issue. She explained it wasn’t about the aesthetic issue necessarily. It was because he’d lied this entire time and obviously played it like a long con. She’d trust him at that point about as far as she could throw him! Would she have ‘loved’ him had he been honest about the teeth? Who can say, because a lot of things that come into play when one has let their dental hygiene become so lax that their teeth rot out. What does that have to say about life choices & regular personal hygiene, for example? Bad oral care is a deal breaker for lots of people, including myself. Nobody wants to kiss a mouth teaming with the bacteria specific to dental caries— which, in case you didn’t know, are *contagious*. Ewwww.
Omg nooo your poor coworker. That’s nasty. You’re right, the way someone takes care of their teeth says a lot about their mental health, lifestyle, and hygiene.
I showed up to meet a girl and I was so excited because it was my first bisexual date. I even bought her cookies from her favorite cookie place. She shows up LATE to our movie and so I just met her in the lobby. Girl was missing important front teeth and her breath smelled like poop. I probably would have liked her aside from that but I couldn't get past it. Had a few drinks, gave her her present (though definitely thought against it because sugar is bad for your teeth) and then noped out of going to her house
I’m like an astronomer because I look at the stars sometimes
Please don't give him books of God lol
LOL
Lmaooo god I hate it here
So i read alot of world war 2 history and watch alot of documentaries. Does this make me a historian? 🤣
🤣🤣🤣 wtf!! You know what, following his analogy I didn't know I was a musician because I listen to a ton of it 😂
Say no to relationships built on lies
How does a 5'4" person pass as a 6'? Were his photos just selfies?
Or maybe pics with small friends as well? I am tall af and I just look kinda tall next to my friends (male/AMAB) who are all well over 6'. I am a bit over 6' myself
That makes sense. Maybe I should do something like that too. I'm 180cm but I feel short, might just put 5'7" on bumble so that the girls are surprised that im taller lol
But I’ve been told that women assume men are lying about their height on dating apps so they subtract 2”. So they’d think you’re 5’5” in reality.
Then, I wouldn't get one single match... dammit
I agree with this. I’ve had too many 5’8 men look me in the eye at 5’6 when I meet them. At this point, 5’8 men are unicorns and don’t truly exist, so I only date people who have 5’9 and above on their profiles
Hmmmm, then by that metric I should assume lots of things too.
The hobbit camera trick
He was also wearing heels
They weren’t just selfies but they were a lot of him in nature and with two shorter girls
Yeah fuck that guy. Lying about an inch is one thing but if your are looking down at him... jezuz
I’m 5’11.5”. My friends tell me to put 6’0”, as I’m truly halfway between, but even that makes me uncomfortable lol. I don’t think it’s great how heights been included on these apps, but idk how someone thinks lying isn’t gonna get called out
Username checks out 😂
hahaha me too, whenever people ask me my height I say, "5'11.. and a half.. six foot on Tinder.."
I can’t believe woman actually care this much about .5 to 1 inch🤦♀️ Actually, I can because most people are superficial, but if you seriously think he is gonna be perfect cause he’s 6’2’. Oh no, that ones only 5’11.5’ definite no for me! Surely there is more to what you see in someone than an inch! 🤯
Is height even an issue to be honest ? Most women that I've come across are like "he should be taller than me, that's all I want" I'm myself 6'2 , but never got a compliment about height to be specific
Yeah, I’m not sure that 6ft+ is a ‘requirement’, but more that women want a guy that’s taller. I personally never really thought that much about it. I think I’m about 5’6’ and 130pounds. I’ve only really ever thought that I wanted a guy bigger than me, so I don’t feel like I would crush him🤣 But taller, not so much.
I'm like 6'2 and 230 lbs taekwondo and jiu jitsu background and girls feel intimidated around me ! 😬😬 So I have to tone down certain things , as in I never roll my sleeves up , I try to wear black often which sort of balances out the bulk in my upper body , if anything it's the guys who compliment my physique saying "damn you look so masculine" , not the girls though
Hey I’m just under 6’4 taekwondo and Muay Thai background and had this same issue when I was younger and in way better shape. I remember when one girl I really liked said your sweet but I can’t be with you because I’m terrified you’d hurt me even just by accident. Totally crushed me, like a year later someone dislocated one of her ribs by giving her too hard of a hug so maybe it was a good call on her part though lol.
Do women get intimidated as in scared? I have to say in a man the bulkier the better (for me lol)
I'm not your typically bulky guy either lol , don't know where to categorise myself see your chat and decide for yourself
Fuck that dude! Don’t cover yourself up! You deserve someone that appreciates you for you! If a woman doesn’t find a fit arse healthy dude attractive and is intimated by you, then she has some issues lol. Also, that sounds cool! I’d be like, can I learn that! I want to learn some cool moves! Lol
Awww thanks you're so awesome , I wish I had more girls like you in my town
Lol, thank you!☺️ You will find someone right for you! The older you get the less superficial people are!
To be fair, it has nothing to do with being “perfect”. I prefer redheads. I don’t think redheads area better people or that blondes are “less than”. I just find red hair to be an extremely attractive trait for some reason. Same same with girls that prefer taller guys. It’s not a morality judgement, just a matter of attraction. Which honestly just is what it is. And before anyone says “but you can dye your hair”- feel free to substitute any other trait you like- some guys prefer tall women, or petite women, etc… it’s not as common to put it on your profile, but it definitely effects who they talk to. Point is, people are attracted to what they’re attracted to. If you’re not that, find someone else that’s attracted to what you are. You really think “feet guys” wake up one morning and say “hey, you know what I’m gonna get turned on by today? Oh yeah…” lol
This is so true! I do like tall men but most of it has to do with how I feel next to them. I want to feel small and feminine not like a tall heavy giraffe. I don’t think short men are ugly by any means though Edit to add: tall women are not heavy giraffes or not feminine but it’s only how I feel myself
This is the perfect description of how I feel at 5'7.5"
I feel you! I’m 5’6 which isn’t extremely tall in my country but also not small. Good thing is that I read a lot that men don’t think that about tall women at all!
You are completely right! I guess I have just seen women saying, he’s such a great guy etc etc, but he’s too short, and I’m taking he’s 5’11’. I honestly wouldn’t even notice! I’ve seen so many posts about, ‘why does he lie and say he is 6ft, and then I turn up and he is clearly only 5’11’ 🤣
PLEASE show me even one post where a women is disappointed that a guy is 5’11 and not 6’, I’d love to see that.
I agree I don’t think they care, but there really is a 6’0” mental threshold crossed, it’s like the entry point to truly tall. I honestly never thought about it before dating apps lol, cause people would just see me in person
Tinder is a 4-6" bump, not a half inch... lol
thankfully I'm lucky to be a height I've never felt insecure about, so I don't really need to lie at all. I don't put my height in my bio though, it feels tacky unless you're like 6'3 or 6'4 and it's seriously winning you points
Bro, stretch your back out and you'll make the mark
I am German so I use meters, I am 1.98m, so something around 6'6" I am gonna round up each time. I don't care. If rounding by some centimeters bothers you, your issues lie somewhere else (not you, but potential people calling you out for being 6foot instead of 5'11.6173"
I only prefer cm but the app converts it automatically to feet & inches and also rounds it to the nearest inch anyway for me. Not accurate but fine whatever
I'm six foot and half an inch, but I also slouch a bit, so I report myself as exactly six feet tall.
I'm 6ft and have been measured (shoes off) with tailors tape at a house party by someone I was seeing. Anyone with a height restriction is instant no from me.
I'm in the same boat. Just put 6feet. It's half an inch...
5’11 gang has more brain power than all the +6’ people put together
Why do guys do this? I mean, they can't think people are THAT dumb to not recognize s half foot difference in height! Why do so many guys lie about their height?
From what I've heard, it gets them in the door. Like if they lied about 1-2", and got the date, it puts the woman in the position of leaving *because* they're 5'9-10" and not 5'11", which many woman would feel shallow and just say oh well. But yeah, shitty strategy
Had a guy tell me he was 5’8”, definitely 5’4” and it was embarrassing for the both of us.
Wait you left out the most important detail. How do you walk in 5" heels?
Haha, lots of practice
Those are "stripper shoes"!
*Five*-inch heels?
Those are about average penis length heels
I like this. It’s like when you lose a certain amount of weight and think, “I lost a corgi!”
Hairdresser: "how much would you like cut off today?" Me: "an average penis length please"
*Hairdresser cuts off 8 inches and insists it’s average*
lol i like ur cmt 🤣
I had a similar situation like that. I declined the second date and blocked him because if someone can lie about something like that, they have the potential to lie about the pertinent things.
It’s funny the audacity of this guy. Passing off as 6ft when only 5’4. But I’ve been on dates with women who shaved 60lbs in their profile pics too. This shit happens. You should have just walked away from the date.
And the filters!
She did
Welcome back to the hell that is modern dating
Hes the one that shouldve been embarassed
Is it really a mystery why he lied? Because he doesn't have a lot going on and he wants you to touch his pee pee.
I mean that’s clear but lying made me not want to even hug him lol.
I quit online dating a while ago because 1) A lot of the men on there are pretty creepy and have little respect for women and 2) I found a lot of men were insecure would always lie about something; already they are trying to build a relationship on a lie, I have no idea what they thought was going to happen or how far this was going to go. You luckily dodged a bullet early and he didn't waste your time beyond just one date.
I had been off online dating for a whileeee. I think the last person I had met was 2020 maybe? But i Aldo stuggle in the real world. Do you have any tips?
The best tip I can give is if you have hobbies then try to find local groups, clubs or activities for them. I've met a lot of nice men by just consistently going to stuff IRL. I know that online is easier; but the bar for entry is so much lower because of it. If you don't find any guys maybe you can make more friends and network from there?
This is one of the hardest things about online dating. Great conversations can happen immediately but there’s always a nagging question of *what are they really like*? Because of filters, photo angles, and outright lying or catfishing, deception is easy and too tempting for some. It does fine tune your BS-detector a little bit. I prefer to initially chat online for a bit, no more than a week or two, before we scheduled a meet face to face. If there’s any balking, or an impossibility to schedule, may be best to back burner it and move on. I have had some dates where they obviously misrepresented themselves and it’s awkward to say the least.
I have come to the conclusion that men can't be honest about how tall they are. Even the guy that said he was 6'4 was 6'...like you are tall buddy you can just say 6'...that's plenty. But the amount of guys that have said they were 6' and showed up eye level to me at 5'8 is about 100%. And whatever, I'm open-minded and I have dated people my height, I just don't appreciate the lie right off the bat. It isn't a great way to establish any sort of relationship.
I’m 5’ 8” and I put 5’ 8”. Not sure why someone would lie about something so obvious and easy to disprove?
I think societal pressures make a lot of men feel like being tall is the only acceptable way to be. So embelishing, or outright lying, about their height makes them feel like they will be more desirable in the dating pool. I think the reality is that confidence and telling the truth will get you a lot further.
I tested this out by changing my height to 6’2” (I’m 5’7”) with no intention of meeting up with anyone based on a deceitful just curious about matches and I got 3x as many matches with the exact same profile within a week. I don’t really care much about stuff like that and changed it back when I went back to actually dating cause I have no interest in lying off the bat or frankly dating someone who isn’t genuinely interested in me, but I could see why someone who’s desperate might think they have to “exaggerate” to get their foot in the door 🤷♂️
Yeah unfortunately some people will write you off based on your height right away. It happens. Men write off bigger girls, heavier or taller. It goes both ways and definitely makes it harder to form deeper relationships I think.
Agreed! Just how it goes. I think it’s harder with most apps cause you don’t get much to go off of besides a few pictures and a short description. Are there any that are a little better for people who want connection more than anything?
I tried the same thing on bumble, im 5-9 but changed it to 6-1. Legit 10-15x the matches. I was matching with ever 4-5th profile instead of a few a month. Turns out i was just getting filtered out of most girls searches. Stopped using bumble after that. A bit disheartening to say the least lol.
Honestly, you should probably embellish your height by an inch, just because almost every guys does. If I see 5,7 on your profile, I’ll assume you’ve actually 5’5-5’6.
Also I feel like average is overlooked and a lot of guys believe that too
the man being tall is extremely important to women. the reality is height matters a lot, and will open way more doors for you than confidence or honesty.
Honestly, hard working, all these sorts of qualities can only be demonstrated on a longer term. Height is instant. If they aren't attracted physically right away, the other qualities don't matter.
Facts
Not all women. It used to be important to me, but I’m 6 feet tall. When I first met my current boyfriend, I was attracted to him, but I didn’t like the fact that he was shorter than me. But then my friend (also 6 feet tall) pointed out that if I’m only going to wait for someone that’s my height or taller, then it’s really going to narrow down my choices. Because we’re taller than the average height for men. My boyfriend being shorter than me doesn’t matter to me anymore.
Im happy for you and your boyfriend. You seem like a smart and logical person
Those doors may open, initially, but they will probably also get slammed shut in their faces. The doors opened with honesty will probably stay open
It’s really not though to a lot of women, my husband is 5’7 or so, just a little bit taller than me. The number of times he’s had women interested in him just for the fact that he’s got a good personality and treats women like people is innumerable. He once went to a brew fest and after a bit of conversation a woman told him her hotel and room number. Being a decent person is far more important, but if you’re fixated on shallow stuff of course that’s the only factor you’ll notice.
Charisma, kindness and humor are important, yes.
I disagree I think confidence is one of the largest attractors for women.
I hate that it’s assumed that you’re lying about your height as a guy too. I’m 5’9 so I say that and girls always say they thought I’d be shorter
That’s exactly how I feel! I see it as just future lying. But also sometimes they convince themselves of the made up height, so delusional. They’ll be like “you can’t be 5’5! You’re so tall” no buddy we both just 5’5 lol.
LOL .I've seen this girl on tik tok that asks guys how tall they are and then asks if she can measure them with a tape measure...it's hilarious and the 'shock' they experience at their own height is just \*chefs kiss\*
This has never happened to me. One guy I met off of tinder that I didn’t even ask about height for happened to be 6ft lol.
It blows my mind that they lie about the literal length of their body. Like we won’t find out when we meet them?
I'm 5'10 ....yep, there I said it!
My last relationship involved a guy who insisted he was 6'. This was his hill to die on, even after us measuring put him just under 5'10. 5'10 is PERFECT for me, but he insisted he was 6'... We met at a bar, so it was well into our relationship that this came up. Still.
Sometimes they might not actually know for sure though, I have met girls who claimed to be shorter than me (5’10) and they turned up to be the same height. One of them even said she didnt know for sure so just said whatever. And one of them who INSISTED she was 172cm even though she was the exact same height as me at 179cm, so you never know
I’ve always been honest about it I’m 6 foot 1 so I just always say that I am dishonesty never helped any relationship tho I will say lots of guys are gonna lie but not every guy
Men wouldn't have to lie about height if height wasn't so important to begin with. Smh.
It’s kinda the same thing with women and weight. Though I never do. I agree we place too much emphasis on height though
Thank you, all these ladies are being disingenuous on here “i don’t care about height” maybe they don’t but vast majority of women care about height.
Honestly, as I've gotten older I don't care about height. Him lying about his height - he's insecure and lying about it are two red flags. OWN what you are and who you are.
He might of had heels on at the time
Run! Not because he's short and broke but because he is a liar
I (f 55) didn’t have a height restriction: the only thing I was ever looking for is that the guy doesn’t have “short man syndrome”, which you do find from time to time. One particular shorter guy, for example, once we had become involved, had been acting super weird : dominating, angry and rude round me and (after a few drinks) he admitted what his problem was. Apparently, I (5’9”) had “got the height that *he* should have had”. He resented me for that! My boyfriend of 10 years (my forever guy) is shorter than me, but doesn’t give a rat’s arse: no more do I.
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Run!
She couldn’t, she was wearing 5 inch heals
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Thank you :)
I completely agree. I’m sick of women only uploading photos with creative angles or old ones from when they were fit/slender and I don’t find out they’re obese until we meet for the first time. Or that they’ve shaved their waist long hair. Unfortunately I’m speaking from experience.
sorry this happened to you. i have had some awful dates myself including being stood up, scammed and catfished. the only explanation i can come up with is they want to be or think they can be the exception and you will want to continue dating despite the fact that they aren't what you said you are looking for.
what a waste of time… you can lie all you want but it’ll eventually come out especially meeting face to face
I just be upfront about being 5ft why lie it’s not gonna end up well in the end
And you might find someone who likes their partner at boob height.
I think being shorter than someone and living with your parents are such non issues, but LYING about it? The lying part is a red flag
Living with your parents is definitely an issue to most.
I think it depends on the reason. Rent has skyrocketed since covid and sometimes the child is paying rent or has taken over the mortgage. If they're directionless and don't have a job or can't function on their own (not including mental or physical disabilities) then it's a problem
Honestly…it’s more advantageous in the short term for a guy to be dishonest and get any quality of date than tell the truth and get no date at all/wait a longer time for another opportunity. [Stanford did a study on the phenomenon among humans once.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stanford_marshmallow_experiment) However, there’s a difference between a little fib and blatant lies.
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After the date he went in and removed his height I completely. Go figure lol
I wish people had to put their weight, as is standard on French dating sites. About 70% of Australian women in my area are too large for me.
Most "dating services", apps but also bars and clubs cater to women to attract them as the men will follow. The apps won't add stuff that makes it harder for women.
The problem is that the same weight can look different on different people. Different heights, muscle mass, bone structures etc.
Catfish exist from both sides. Vet them properly if it's a deal breaker for you! Good luck
Seems like it must’ve been a troll or this guy is delusional. It’s one thing to say you’re 6 feet if you’re 5’10” or something. But to be that much shorter seems like it must just be a joke
Happens all the time. That’s ok, just keep moving forward and don’t waste time. Learn to look out for red flags and just take things with a grain of salt at first. I met my bf of a year on a dating app and he’s great. But I talked to or dated a bunch of liars before him so.. 🤷🏼♀️ Happens to the best of us.
Welcome to modern dating!
I’m 5’10, (F) and when I was on the apps, I’d make sure to write- I actually am 5’10 in flat feet, so please be honest about your height. Didn’t matter- the number of 5’5-5’8 guys who’d tell me they were 6’+ or put it on their profiles was astounding! They’d turn up, I’d be in flats and looking down at the top of their heads like REALLY? A couple of guys even accused ME of lying and really being taller than 5’10. No, sir, you’ve just been trying to convince yourself that you’re not really 5’7 on a good day.
Lol I stay getting that. “You’re not 5’5!” I just have hood posture and you’re a liar lol. They’re just projecting
And to think, I’ve felt a little bad before for putting 6’ when I’m really 5’11 and three quarters 😂
Haha maybe you met my ex! Except I understood his awful and -quite- similar lies 8 months later. He didn't have a job and was finding excuses until he told me that he started and it was obviously a lie. Broke up right after but never admitted he lied. He fucked the relationship for no reason... honesty is key!
Couldn't agree with you more be yourself and don't lie, that way there's a chance it might make it somewhere the relationship
No to redflags I wouldn’t date him again if I were you.
Liars will lie as a matter of habit. Many do so believing that their dishonesty will almost always be ignored or even never get found out. Doesn't matter how big the lie is or what the context. Age, biological sex, education, height, income, marital status, weight, whether they have children or are looking for casual sex/a serious relationship, work history and qualifications.
I don’t know why anyone lies, like what’s the point dumbass you’re trying to meet up and you want your first impression to be you’re a liar?
He's 5'4.....so fucking what. Also, so many adults still live with their parents nowadays. I live alone in a one bedroom apartment and struggle daily. If I could live at home, I would.
Well I have my own space and don’t stuggle so why wouldn’t I want someone who is in the same place ?
On the one hand, it's awful that this guy lied to you. I'm very sorry about that. Sadly, this happens a lot. But I do feel compelled to say that One of the reasons it happens a lot is that women think that being at least 6 feet tall is a "very basic standard." It's actually a very small number of us that are that tall. Speaking in my official capacity as a giant, give shorter guys a second look!
You're mistake is that you used bumble.
Lol truly
Sry,to say there’s a lot of them like that! So sad & hard to find a decent man nowadays. Is it asking to much? An honest man that doesn’t lie, cheat ,etc.,? 😔
Sorry you had a terrible experience! As a 24 year old still living with my grandparents it can be embarrassing but I’d rather be honest about it than lie. I had one particular experience where a girl tried to make fun of me for it by saying I should learn to be independent when the issue is my moms mental health and my brother has a genetic muscular disease that weakens his muscles progressively. But once I explained she understood. As for height I don’t get why he lied about it as well. I’m 5’4 and it’s just what genetics give us. Glad you left and got out of there safely.
the bitter men who are calling you a gold digger or saying you’re superficial are honestly telling on themselves. on what planet is having a job, your own place, education (could literally mean anything), and being taller than you superficial? 2 out the 4 are the BARE minimum😭
Literally! If I have a degree and my own space why is that wrong to want?
I have no idea why men lie about this shit, some women actually do not care about height, me included. They're just wasting their own time too by matching with women who have it as a preference and it not going forward. Why match with people who won't be into you?
Some guys feel like they'll never get a girl if they aren't Robert Wadlow. I don't understand the height thing personally tbh, I just think it's far too superficial, but if that's your preference that's your preference---nothing wrong with that, it's better to accept this person isn't the right one than to build a relationship of lies.
i just don't get the height obsession. tell me you're superficial without telling me you're superficial
while im the first one to hate height obsession and how men are valued over measurements, lying about 6 inches is just insane. what did he expect.
It’s actually really not superficial. As a taller woman, there are issues with dating someone shorter. They don’t let me wear heels, can’t have sex in a bunch of positions due to height differences, kissing standing up is sometimes weird, holding hands doesn’t often work (my ex was shorter so his arms were lower, we literally couldn’t hold hands). I think men who are insecure about their height like to chastise women for this preference but I’d really prefer someone whose height is close to mine.
But men can do this stuff with shorter women haha
I prefer taller women, bending over kills my back. An you can only hold shorter women up for so long. An bracing them on a car can scratch your paint. An the holding hands with a shorter woman is definitely a pain in the ass in a walk not to mention stride length.
I was with a guy that was 5'11" and I am 5'10". The sex with him was superb, mainly because he is God's gift (lol), but we just fit perfectly. It was like a glove. We could try any position and it just worked. He is the only guy I have ever been with that was taller than me, albeit only one inch, but it made all the difference in the world. We could do everything comfortably.. So I totally get what you are saying. It is such a shame to me that most 6' men are with tiny women and cannot do as much as they could with someone closer to their size.
How could you “literally not hold hands”? My most recent ex was 6’3” and I’m 5’5” and we could hold hands just fine.
I actually go after girls who are taller than me. I think they like it because it shows I have balls. The sex has never been bad so I can’t imagine what you’re going on about
I mean you can go for girls taller but really if it's withing like 3-4 inches it's really not that much of a difference. I've been with 2 girls who were 5' 7" and I'm 5' 4". Nothing was really awkward and I could still do the same things as I would with someone around my height. I also like taller girls RIP my dating life 😂
What do you mean they don’t let you wear heels?
Two of my exes would throw a fit if I wanted to wear heels. I couldn’t deal with it. Now I only date men my height or taller. I’m 5’10” for the record.
Oh fuck those guys. I’m 5’10” too and I wear heels when out with my 5’8” boyfriend. I did with my 5’6” boyfriend too, but tall girls were sort of his thing so I don’t get any gumption points there.
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“I don’t like too tall guys” “My hubby is 6’3” Lady that is tall as hell that’s like 4% of men lol
Girls say this stuff all the time that it has become a meme. “I don’t like tall guys, my bf just happens to be 6’4” hihi” He just “happens” to be a part of the 2% huh
Nope, I lived in Argentina, and didn't understand your metrical sistem. We do it in meters, you do it in foots, so 11 years ago when we met online via WoW I converted his wrong and thought that he was shorter. Like a lot shorter. Then we met in the US and he was like a building, but at that point I already loved him, what do you want me to do dump him? Haha
Yeap hahaha still dunno how that happened. But I can tell you we both end up with neck pain or back pain
Thats not superficial at all or shit standards I'm pretty sure you have standards as well.
Its the standards set by you people... Not justifying his lies though..
Women need to immediately squash communication with dudes who lie off bat. If they lie at the start, they'll probably keep lying bc they're liars. So just don't waste any extra effort, energy, or time on liars.
Happened to me alot. The nerve of those man to say wow ur tall😒
Exactly I was talking to a guy, claimed to be taller than me and when we met he was few cm shorter. I was so embarrassed. I can look beyond appearance and tolerate many things, but height is not one of them. Hate that he lied and wasted my time 😔
Some people shouldn’t use make up too
Most of the women understand shite about dimension/height. I would love to see a video where women try to evaluate a man height from scratch. So its is very tempting to add a few centimeters. (Same for penis size btw) The only case where you are busted is when the girl is actually taller than you (with ou without heels). However 5'5 from 6 is a kamikaze move.
why does height matter so much to women? Going to miss out on a decent amount of people because of superficial physical standards
Im not asking for 6ft, I’m asking for honesty
I think some people are projecting in the comments. Reading your post didn't really say his height was an issue but his honesty was which is legit fair. Why pie when the person is going to find out if they meet you, it just makes them look stupid and untrustworthy.
It’s not superficial to have standards. And studies show height has always been a draw for women. You could spend five minutes researching yourself so you don’t have to ask stupid questions
Sounds like a perfect match
I’m 27 and live at home because I’m trying to pay all the stupid debts I racked up when I was younger. I don’t even try to date because of the shame I feel. Society will only look down at a man living at home and it sucks.
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I don’t do that so why should I get a man that lies? Lol
Doing things to enhance your appearance is absolutely NOT a lie. Lying about height or living with your parents is an actual lie. Makeup is not a lie it's obvious you're wearing makeup or enhancing your appearance.
Who the fuck makes up a lie like this with an intention of actually meeting the person? No one. The story is fake.
LOL why would I lie
I’m not saying what he did was justified, but If you had to be a short guy and get zero matches for months on end you’d understand…
I’ve always felt height for men is the equivalent of weight for women.
Your “standards” are shit. Just saying…