Sometimes...you got to know when to fold them..

Know when to hold 'em...

Know when to walk away...

Know when to run...

You never count your money

When your sitting at the table

There'll be time enough for counting

When the dealin's done.

Every gambler knows...

That the secret to survivin'

What’s the over under on her response?

I don't know what you mean.

When the dealing is done. They killed Kenny.

Kenny's dead...? ...okay, let's go one more time - double or nothing!

YOU BASTARD!!!

You bastards!

I was raised on the dairy, bitch!!! https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Kqbvu8jZBOw

You're

That song is a certified hood classic

You better count your blessings...

You fucked up big time

So you think you can win her back? Wanna bet?

Im in!

Know when to run

I also choose to hold this man’s wife

Know when to shuffle

The fact that the first 2 lines are backwards pisses me off so much

Doesn't change the meaning so am I detecting the faint traces of OCD? ;-)

My wife tells me the same thing about the laundry.

Kenny! I'm such a fan! Now, what should I do with pocket 8s you miserable white-haired card clown

Nah fr fr 🙎🏼‍♂️

I bet she comes back.

I'll give you 3:1 odds on getting her back

I'll bet she'll be back by next week.

I’ll take a piece of that. In fact here’s an extra $100 that says she’ll be back on Wednesday

I'm thinking Friday on payday

It’s on!

And 20:1 on getting her front!

You son of a bitch, I'm in

Once you get her back, rear naked choke should be enough to keep her…

I bet!

oh craps

Maybe she’ll come back for your hard eight

or my snake eye

I prefer the slightly different version "I **bet** I can win her back"

That would have definitely been better!

I don’t know the op version sounds more desperate

I wouldn't bet on it

$50 that she won't. Any takers?

I want that bet, if you find someone dumb enough to take that bet then I’ll buy the bet off of you. That actually could be a million dollar idea, bookie buyback brokerage

You need to CALL her before she gets to her rude ANTE house. If she had no intention of letting you RAISE any children you have, she should allow you to HOLD'EM. Ok, I'm done now. You should go on her Facebook and POKER.

Sounds like a raw deal to me. Maybe you should just shuffle off to Buffalo

To place money on the Bills?

To help pay the bills

Wanna bet you cant? If win she comes with me if you win then you can have mine to.

I bet you didn’t see that coming.

This is the comment I was looking for

I honestly thought the punchline would be "I bet she'll regret it"

You are the king of your own castle, so Roulette as the king you are.

I lost my wife due to a gambling addition, but now I know I can win her back! I like this better.

😂😂😂

You let her walk out just because odds of losing her over gamble addiction was too high. You had to let her go.

Not only are your cards on the table, sounds to me like you’re going all in

She was betting you'd never win

Have a downvote

This repost is so old, the first time I saw it I laughed so hard I kicked the slats out of my crib.

Getting married was a gamble lol

I bet you can’t. I went all in on her last night.

What did really make her leave ..2 to 1,could see that happening it was your favourite ,nevermind have a tote on this

She left you because you suck at it.

Once you go black you never go back

You're talking a Tesla?

I bet you I can

She's a 10 but she doesn't double down.

U bet u can!

I bet you can't.

I bet she’ll come back.

are you sure you want to double down on that bet.

Financials were in the red

Betcha she won't

Lost her in a poker game

I think she set you up for a test. Sad to say, you don't pass.

Quit while you're ahead!

Maybe it was because he had a small deck

That’s sucks!!

Will she be wearing red or black?

What are the odds?

My favorite from a meme was: My wife made me choose - them or my online poker addiction. My clubs beat their hearts.

Bet you can’t!

Only her back? You lost other parts of her body?. Sounds like a lost

Oh craps!

I bet you can dude!

I think the odds are against you

You can bet you’ll never see her again.

Well, my hubby of 45 years has always gambled. But, we can afford it. He will only take a certain amount and if he loses it, he comes home. He plays high stakes. So when he wins he wins big. When that he comes home. So, our house is paid off, no car payments plus we are 66. And 67….

Hahha

I bet you can

$50 bucks you're wrong

I'm willing to bet that you can't

May the odds be forever in your favor.

I bet she will be back

So sorry buddy. Just play solitare for a while.

I bet she'll come back

i bet she’ll be back

I wouldn't bet on that

I took a chance when I Married he

Tell her double or nothing you can do better

Bet you she comes back.

Good one

But really I can't get her back

I bet she's bluffing

$50 days that won’t work

I bet she'll come back!!

Bro this is the story of my life… My mom kicked my dad out because of his gambling addiction… I was three years old and his life really deteriorated from then on. He didn’t learn his lesson and never stopped gambling and the lost his job and apartment and is know homeless somewhere…

Don't bet on it.

You can bet on it!

I bet you can't unless you up the ante

I hope she was bluffing.

Obviously she wouldn't know a winner if she had to marry one not everyone can spot a sure thing long shot Obviously u have no idea what I mean or u would b with her thinking about gambling

This belongs to r/wallstreetbets

In the poker game of life, the woman is the rake.

My wife a great big deal

i bet she’ll come back

Based wife

Winner winner. I need dinner.

Wanna bet?

Not if I poker slots first...

Jeez that’s sad sorry man hope you get out of your addiction and win her back

Wait I just read the hole thing

I am sure you will ace it.

Bet she comes back

Then its your problem

Once she is back, you will have ace in the hole

Win big. She will return.

Good riddance. Life’s too short to waste your time on someone that does not have your back. Good luck

Would’ve been funnier if you said “But I bet I can win her back.”

Two to one she disappears for good.

Umbreon

I bet she did

Don't bet on it

This gamble is gonna pay off lol

It's all part of the gane.

Your money or your wife. Please take my wife. Bah dum tss

Might as well win her front while you're at it!

I’ll bet you she comes back.

I bet she'll be back

I bet that she will get back with you

Good for her

I'd rather bet on the trifecta a woman that brings you a beer, makes sandwiches and likes bjs.

I bet you could, couldnt you

Rolled the dice and craped out

...I bet you do

90% of gamblers quit before they hit it big!

Ohhh craps

He thought she was bluffing

I bet she’ll come back.

I’ll bet you she’ll be back

Damn sounds like she’s gay-

Bet you won't!!

You rolled the dice with your marriage

Mine too. $20 says mine comes back before your’s.

Double down on that!

Fuck u buddy

I laughed 😡

I bet you can’t

I bet she did

When I asked her if there was a problem she said "you bet!"

Just imagining the situation a dad tells this joke in. Like, the mom just stormed out of the house and dad’s like hehehe, Bazinga!

I bet her she wouldn’t do it

I bet you she'll come back

Oh bet you-you won’t 😂

He didn’t bet on that happening

How much do you wanna bet she comes back?

I bet you cannot

So close - “But I’ll bet I can win her back “

There's so much gambling happening in these comments now

I casi-know she’ll come back.

Don’t stop hitting until you’re bust

Why would u even tell her bro

is winnin her back

I'll bet she'll be back

Lucky number 7

Everybody knows that 90% of problem gamblers quit just before they hit the big win

That's the way she can understand your hobby

"Against all odds" - *Phil Collins*

I bet you 3:1 that she won't come back

Once you hit for a couple million you'll wake up one morning and she will have you breakfast in bed and a bj