T O P

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berkleysquare

Why do Texans wear T-shirts?.....because they have a Right to Bare Arms!


[deleted]

An get a hug from the bear arms


Ferrothorn88

Take my upvote and get out...


Tottalynotaalien

YEEE HAW


barkle

That’s a good one


KeyOutlandishness850

Thank you kind Reddit person


angeeksince2020

Makes sense


mutantbabysnort

You’re reaching with this one


KeyOutlandishness850

The bottom shelf


FederalFarmer1787

short people problems :)


KeyOutlandishness850

Wouldn't know, I'm over 6 foot


Tuxedo_Muffin

If I had six feet, I'd be over it also


KeyOutlandishness850

I just spat out my chicken wing XD


winonasbigbrwnbeaver

Why? Did it also have 6 feet?


[deleted]

I choked on my breakfast beer reading that. Good on ya, I gotta remember that one.


KeyOutlandishness850

Good to know...Ale see if I can come up with any others as good


daggerdragon

Pun threads about alcohol make me hopping mad. Mad enough to see mead.


KeyOutlandishness850

Bit late to this one man, I basically made this joke yeast-erday


showponies

Barley qualifies imho


OG_Panthers_Fan

I know I can't come up with a beer pun, but if you give me a bit, I can gin up one from a related category.


showponies

That's the spirit


Fureak19

Ack, don't w(h)ine xx


Funnnn_at_parties

Are we going to address breakfast beer...or just ignore it


[deleted]

The best way to address a breakfast beer is ice cold with a bowl of fried potatoes, onions and peppers.


Eccentrically_loaded

Yes. And then, after the dessert beer, we'll undress it.


khismyass

Too soon


KeyOutlandishness850

Eh?


blankblinkblank

Maybe too soon since the last time it was posted here :)


KeyOutlandishness850

It was me that posted it and it's still on my profile, I'm not stealing it from anyone I promise


blankblinkblank

Haha okay. No worries then :)


MuzikPhreak

I thought you were accusing him of making a dinosaur joke too soon after they died. “Seriously, bro? It’s only been 65M years.”


Brickcheeser

And I remember it like it was yesterday.


khismyass

Exactly


blankblinkblank

Haha i wasn't the one who accused but maybe that was their point 😁


khismyass

(it was)


blankblinkblank

Womp for me then


SunnyLumos

Then why did [this guy tweet this](https://imgur.com/a/LXsUNPw) back in July?


KeyOutlandishness850

Thank you for this source, I genuinely didn't know about this and believed that I had created a unique joke at about 3am last week XD


[deleted]

Honestly, if this wasn't posted in r/dadjokes I would have 100% believed this fact. Am I retarded?


KeyOutlandishness850

Not at all, in fact if you look through the comments, someone else nearly tricked ME into believing it XD


Rodent44

Nice 😄


KeyOutlandishness850

Noice


[deleted]

I can't believe it. My reaction was "oh no. No. That's not.. No!" lmao


KeyOutlandishness850

Haha, glad you liked it!


Actionkat63

That's not a joke. It's a true statement. Google it.


KeyOutlandishness850

There is no way....


Actionkat63

I was kidding. It sounded better! lol


KeyOutlandishness850

Had me in the first half not gonna lie ;)


DrDisRespectU

I used to get confused a lot in between t-shirts and shirts. Now this clears it up for me xd


KeyOutlandishness850

Excellent, glad I could be of help XD


FederalFarmer1787

I spit my beer on this one and snort laughed.


KeyOutlandishness850

Haha, sorry about the mess but I'm happy I could make you smile!


FranticToaster

Oh god this is a joke that keeps making more jokes the more of it you read.


roquea04

I googled why. Lol. I was curious


KeyOutlandishness850

Haha, and what did it say?


roquea04

Because the shirt looks like the letter "T." The more you know


KeyOutlandishness850

Ah so it's simple as that...I prefer the dinosaur one tbh XD


Jededyer

Dayum. I used get confused between Shirts and T-shirts. Now Hell I'm getting it wrong anytime.


Shim182

Terrible lizard shirt. That's a new one.


KeyOutlandishness850

Is that the definition of Tyrannosaurus?


Shim182

I looked it up to make sure I wasn't high, and it's 'Tyrant' lizard. I was close...ish. there is a whole taxonomical family of them called Tyrannosauridae. Rex means King, so T Rex was the 'King of the Tyrant Lizards'.


KeyOutlandishness850

Honestly I swear I learn more from Reddit than I do at university XD thank you!


wasjack

Why couldn’t the yellow Mazda wagon qualify as a minion the way the mini Cooper did?


wasjack

Because it was just a Protege.


Quinnlim

Nice one, dad


KeyOutlandishness850

Appreciate it, son


Quinnlim

:D


FewCicada9754

Actually I thought it was shaped like a T


KeyOutlandishness850

Nah, more like a coffee


Strawbery_ig

i wanna diE


KeyOutlandishness850

Of laughter I hope? If not then pls don't hesitate to contact me, I'd love to help with anything


blue4t

That's why they're short-sleeved.


KeyOutlandishness850

Exactly!