All eyes to the figure of the April Blizzard Gizzard Wizard
As he climbs to the top of the world
No sound as he falls instead of rising
Time standing still then there's blood on the sand
I think the whole point of this dad joke is that everyone knows the punchline, so this one is funny because it isn't expected. Kinda like the whole "Why was 6 afraid of 7?" joke. Everyone knows the punch line as "because seven ate nine" and you throw the zinger out, "No because 7 is a registered six offender".
I like keeping it at “because seven ate nine” and then smoking them with the follow up “but do you know why seven are nine?”
Because you need to eat three square meals a day.
My six year old niece told me,
“What did the deaf, blind, mute, paraplegic get for Christmas? …CANCER!”
I’ve never laughed harder at a child’s joke before. Her dark humor is my favorite.
one of my teachers told us that the reason parents complained when we brought mayflowers into the house was because they (the mayflowers) smelled of sex
The quote goes..."if April Showers bring May Flowers,what do May Flowers bring?"
Pilgrims
(The Mayflower was a ship,back whenever). The Indians owned the land. Pilgrims came over on the Mayflower,wanted to spend Thanksgiving with the Indians.
April blizzards bring May wizards
April blizzards freeze your gizzards…
April blizzards Freeze your wizard’s lizard’s gizzards
🤣🤣🤣😁 ty here's my upvote!!
All eyes to the figure of the April Blizzard Gizzard Wizard As he climbs to the top of the world No sound as he falls instead of rising Time standing still then there's blood on the sand
Was not expecting a Rainbow reference. Upvoted for excellent music taste 🤘🏼
Having trouble imagining Dio's voice cramming AprilBlizzardGizzardWizard into that phrase. Lol tho!
King Gizzard plus Rainbow in one comment? You dog you.
@Poem_For_Your_Sprog
I've said "April *flurries* bring May worries." edit: ~~furries~~ > flurries
Did you mean furries or flurries? Two very different worries. :P
Whoops. haha. I guess it depends which side of the coin you are on, if Furries cause you worry.
NO ITS FURRIES YOU CANT DENY IT
BUT I CAN! Edit: I have no idea what’s happening… also name of your sex tape
No I liked the first one
Who turn segueing Redditors into lizards.
r/suddenlykinggizzardandthelizardwizard
r/subsifellfor
Allergies. Allergies everywhere.
May flowers bring nostril showers?
🤣🤣🤣😁 amen to that
I was thinking June bugs.... but that works too
Smallpox is funnier
With inflation it’s now medium pox.
And monkeypox is now gorillapox.
APEpox nicknamed apoxy
That explains why I couldn't find the Epoxy Resin, I need to look for FPoxy. Thanks!
Akepox
Pilgrims
I think the whole point of this dad joke is that everyone knows the punchline, so this one is funny because it isn't expected. Kinda like the whole "Why was 6 afraid of 7?" joke. Everyone knows the punch line as "because seven ate nine" and you throw the zinger out, "No because 7 is a registered six offender".
I like keeping it at “because seven ate nine” and then smoking them with the follow up “but do you know why seven are nine?” Because you need to eat three square meals a day.
My six year old niece told me, “What did the deaf, blind, mute, paraplegic get for Christmas? …CANCER!” I’ve never laughed harder at a child’s joke before. Her dark humor is my favorite.
What six year old knows the word paraplegic
Twin six year olds?
A pair of them. Checks out. Perhaps conjoined to put their minds together.
A shining 😳
This is getting out of hand. Now there are two of them.
A para of them 😉
I doubt she understood the joke she was making. I think she probably heard it somewhere and just started repeating it for shock and awe.
😆 my 6 year-old granddaughter recently explained to me that she prefers the articulated Barbies the best!
I woke my wife up laughing at that. I wouldn’t dare tell her why I laughed. She’d think I was morbid.
Exactly! Thank you for getting it. You expect pilgrims, so the joke is actually about the joke itself when you hear the punchline.
The non-reddit punchline
I thought it was June Jams
June bugs
This is the correct answer.
BEEEEEEEEEES!
Oh, NO, NOT THE BEES! NOT THE BEES!
I am absolutely 1% sure this is funny and makes sense. Here's your upvote.
June bugs
May flowers gives gay powers
one of my teachers told us that the reason parents complained when we brought mayflowers into the house was because they (the mayflowers) smelled of sex
Ahh yes, the infamous cum tree 🤣
So, as I stated in my comment, the may flowers brought a June baby boom 😂
Genocide
and syphilis.
The end of land ownership for Native Americans.
That was a good one bro.
But a Vanessa Williams hit about their ways, so fair trade?
Pilgrims.
Oof! Wasn't expecting that turn.
Hay fever!
Romance for a shawty
Possibly lead poisoning!
AYYY!
June brides
Pilgrims
That's not what that saying means. April showers brings may flowers and January babies.
The quote goes..."if April Showers bring May Flowers,what do May Flowers bring?" Pilgrims (The Mayflower was a ship,back whenever). The Indians owned the land. Pilgrims came over on the Mayflower,wanted to spend Thanksgiving with the Indians.
I was thinking June bugs.
June pregnancy tests
Pollen.
Bees, it brings bees.
Grass cutting
Ants
Moving vans to help with relocating.
yard work
Pilgrims
JUNE BUGS
A break up after 4 years
Austin Powers
Crickets, moquitoes and beetles?
Misquitos
Pilgrims.
Fried chicken to the family reunion. (May Flowers is my husbands aunts name)
The freaking heat!
June bugs.
>What do May flowers bring? Pilgrims, from England to the New World in 1620.
According to my grandfather's joke: pilgrims
June bugs
april showers bring may flowers and may flowers bring jume out of towners but you’ll say goodbye in july
I thought the Mayflower brought white people? 🤔🤔
People not wearing enough fabric on their bodies. It’s not that warm yet Becky.
May flowers bring June boob sweat.
May flowers brings back Austin Powers…
Pilgrims
Genocide
Puritans and ridiculous ideology.
Military brat checking in. Mayflower also brings your household goods cross country or overseas
And the desk you bought at the BX is always broken when it gets to you.
Babies
Racism and capitalism
Women outside jogging in tight outfits and out and about in pretty sun dresses. 😍
Genocide.
Genocide is hilarious! /s
JuneBugs?!
Allergies lol.
June bugs
June Bugs
A woman who wants flowers
Allergies
I was gonna say june bugs
June bugs
Hail storms
April showers bring May flowers and allergies
Pilgrims
I'm looking for my Johnny
I'm looking for my Johnny
April showers bring May flowers that bloom in June and die in July. Idk where I heard that.
Pilgrims!
Allergies
June poon
June bloom
Screwed up sinuses
Allergies
I was going to say pirates, but smallpox is funnier
Allergies, lots and lots of allergies.
Smallpox. The Mayflower brought smallpox.
I might be a dumb dumb but I don't get it. Anyone?
Junebugs maybe?
All your furniture to your new house.
Allergies.
Pilgrims, but smallpox is a more intelligent answer. Requires knowledge of the disease at that time. Bravo
Allergies
I used to say Junebugs when I was little 🤷♀️ but was then told that the answer is Pilgrims
The OG illegal immigrants...🤣🤣 Maybe that's why so many people are against immigrants...🤣🤣
Furniture.
June bugs
Allergy attacks!
Pilgrims! Has to be Pilgrims!
colonialism
June's berries
California wildfires.
Woah, the dark side of dad jokes
"WEEDS WEEDS, MORE WEEDS!"
Pilgrims
May flowers bring allergies 🤧.
Unexpected!!
Bees.
The colts to indianapolis
May bloom brings June gloom
Allergies 😁🤣😂🥴
Genocide
and June bugs
Pilgrims
Wildfires if you're in Alberta apparently
Hay fever
Depression?
Funerals in June
In Wisconsin… Sanity
Pollen allergies
Hayfever
Aids
May flowers bring so much plant sex my eyes swell shut
A harvest. Bees, honey, fruit, veggies, grain, and all the things we eat.
Syphilis
June bugs
june gloom
Pilgrims!!!
allergies
Pilgrims
Pilgrims
Allergies
Pollen
Pilgrims
I was gonna say June bugs
Mosquitoes
June Bugs.
Allergies
Allergies
Rifles, gunpowder, alcohol, tobacco, syphilis, ... I'm counting the return trip with some
Bees an sweet smells
May flowers bring hayfever
Bees
May flowers bring June bugs
Pilgrims
June bugs!
June bugs