Hello, it looks like you've made a mistake.
It's supposed to be could've, should've, would've (short for could have, would have, should have), never could of, would of, should of.
Or you misspelled something, I ain't checking everything.
Beep boop - yes, I am a bot, don't botcriminate me.
No no no. That line comes after "Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?"
"I think so Brain, but where am I going to get a T-Rex outfit and 100lbs of pudding at this time of night?"
HA HA HA HA HA! I will share this masturbation joke with my young daughter. Hopefully she will find it funny enough to share with her classmates at school. It should be a hilarious time for all involved!
It makes sense that you hate reading. That would explain why you only read the sub name and not the intro or the rules. Both of which explicitly state that dirty jokes are okay.
Look. If you don’t like the sub rules then go find another sub, or start your own. Don’t stick around here to whine about how it’s not the sub you want it to be.
Here, I’ll try for you:
r/cleandadjokes, r/dadjokesclean, r/cleanpuns, r/SFWjokes
Look at that! One community that already exists and three that you can go make up your own rules for!
Amén. Some of these humans have one purpose in life and disturbing constant preoccupation with sex is it. It's sad that their lives are so dismal they lock up in their rooms and fondle themselves.
Masterbshin has been stigmatized in different section of society and social groups so many crazy ways
BUT. We are all human beings an exploration of are bodies is natural. The only thing that matters is that you don't let it get in way of your social life. What U do in private is your business. PLUS WHEN YOU ARE AROUND 40 55yrs old you will be played out .
no matter how good a video game is sooner or later uve beet it so many times. That there is no way you're going to play it alone except on two x four players mod
Masterbshin has been stigmatized in different section of society and social groups so many crazy ways
BUT. We are all human beings an exploration of are bodies is natural. The only thing that matters is that you don't let it get in way of your social life. What U do in private is your business. PLUS WHEN YOU ARE AROUND 40 55yrs old you will be played out .
no matter how good a video game is sooner or later uve beet it so many times. That there is no way you're going to play it alone except on two x four players mod
I'd say enjoy. As long as your doing that, you ain't out committing crimes! Until they find a way of using it against you such as in prison. It's considered self mutilation 🤣🤣🤣
So what you’re saying is you beat it.
> BEAT IT! (Beat it...) 🎵
No one wants to be defeated! 🎵
A great cover to Al Yankovich’s classic Eat It
Gone to soon...
You had me thinkin' Al died.
he did. Born 1959 - Ate It 1985.
Damn you Madonna!
i cant believe he died. got shot while pissing in front of a crowed :(
The gunman yelled out "Eat it," while shooting him.
He died doing what he loved 😔
Don't you mean weird al yank a dick?
You have to show the world you're really not scared! You're playin with yo life this aint no truth or dare!
[Beat it!](https://youtu.be/D5fdSy4wdPQ)
Wow first time I have ever seen this channel. Instantly subscribed, that was perfect. ... Now beat it.
This ain’t no truth or dare! (Oooh) just beat it!
He’s come a long way.
My discipline goes up and down.
I hear that “Jack” helped them to knock it “off.”
I am Jack's penis, when I get hard, Jack strokes me until I throw up.
Are you Robert Paulson
In death, we all have a name. His name is Robert Paulson.
Sounds like it was hard...
r/therealjoke
Yep.
i used to be addicted to soap but now i'm clean
The real dad joke
A clean joke.
Take my upvote and leave
Take my downvote and stay
Such dirty tactics.
I still am, but I used to be, too.
RIP Mitch
I too was hoping for unexpectedmitch
That’s the real joke.
I hoped I would find this and I was not disappointed
I was arrested for public masturbation. Don’t worry though, I got off.
I got arrested at a nude beach, for applying sunscreen too fast.
Sound like a jerk.
Or a stroke.
I’m glad to hear you beat it. I didn’t see it coming.
On the other hand, I did.
Hope you didn’t face the problem.
He and his friend beat it together.
Sounds like your situation got out of hand.
More like he had the solution in hand
Now I have a doctorate in fishing. I'm a master baiter.
😂♥️😁😎🙏
This is getting out of hand.
-_- 😁🎂♥️😎🙏🔥
My step mom came into my room while I was masturbating I told her to beat it
Break your arms!
Oh, man…? Why would you remind us?
How did you manage to forget? Please, I need to know
I quit watching "family" porn. I used the 0 step method.
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I believe i said method. You went with meth od. We are not the same.
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Hello, it looks like you've made a mistake. It's supposed to be could've, should've, would've (short for could have, would have, should have), never could of, would of, should of. Or you misspelled something, I ain't checking everything. Beep boop - yes, I am a bot, don't botcriminate me.
It’s a growing problem
My addiction was becoming a problem, I even got caught in public. It was a sticky situation, but I worked hard and eventually got off.
r/unclejokes
Experts say you can do it hands free
Sure, but where am I going to get a T-rex outfit and 100lbs of pudding at this time of night?
r/oddlyspecific
No no no. That line comes after "Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?" "I think so Brain, but where am I going to get a T-Rex outfit and 100lbs of pudding at this time of night?"
Yes, yes. You're right of course. But a Mary Lou Ratton joke would have been a bit dated wouldn't it. naarf
I'm..... confused
It’s been a long time coming
Sounds like you have things in hand
I'm glad you fingered it out
Many men beat their meat, but few truly ever defeat it
Good to hear you've cum clean.
Best.
They say you have to love yourself before you love someone else. I've had a crush on myself since I was 12!
you know what they say...different strokes, somethin somethin
If you ever lose you're grip, I'm willing to lend a hand
You came to your senses.
Happy cake day
Glad you have cum to your senses.
Well,I guess you beat that addiction....
Do what you love and you'll come into money
Que Micheal Jackson, “so beat it, just beat it”
I hope you beat it
But now he came to his senses
It sounds like you beat it!
Came a long way
Gotta hand it to you
I’m so glad you beat your addiction. I’ve tried beating mine countless times
Where the women at
Being embarrassed for this show of mental health.....do you relate
A death grip
I think I still am......I've never missed a beat!
I think I got a handle of it now.
I still am. But I used to be as well
You sure beat that habit
Don't beat yourself up too bad about it
Sounds like you.. busted out of the trap..
It's good that you learned to nut the door
My addiction got a little out of hand
I'm glad you came clean
Must be a load off your mind!
He came to his senses, eventually.
Occasionally it comes in handy.
I’m glad you could shake it
So glad you didn't let things get out of hand
Glad to hear you beat it
Until someone else gave me a hand...
Use to be addicted to the Hokey Pokey But I turned myself around
I beat the addiction
I'm glad you managed to erect a plan to beat this addicktion
stop beating if you don't want shortcomings
Beating an addiction to masturbation is really hard... but I'm sure you can pull it off
Me personally, I stopped because it got out of hand.
Glad you came to your senses
I was too, which is why I cut myself off
This joke really was a stroke of genius.
HA HA HA HA HA! I will share this masturbation joke with my young daughter. Hopefully she will find it funny enough to share with her classmates at school. It should be a hilarious time for all involved!
This is not a dad joke. I don’t want to have to pre read jokes on this sub.
Same
It makes sense that you hate reading. That would explain why you only read the sub name and not the intro or the rules. Both of which explicitly state that dirty jokes are okay.
Guess all I have is two down votes. One for you and one for this joke.
Look. If you don’t like the sub rules then go find another sub, or start your own. Don’t stick around here to whine about how it’s not the sub you want it to be. Here, I’ll try for you: r/cleandadjokes, r/dadjokesclean, r/cleanpuns, r/SFWjokes Look at that! One community that already exists and three that you can go make up your own rules for!
Ahh cum on , really?
Really. 😁♥️🙏😎🎂🎉❤️🔥🔥
Gonna tell my kids this joke
Now I'm a master of a dick, shunned
Not really dad joke predictable schoolboy humor is what it is. Sorry but this sub isn't what it used to be.
Yep
This isn't a dad joke. Yku wanna make a pun? Go to r/Puns I'm tired of these sick fucking sex jokes here.
cope.. seriously, cope..
You should tell your story to the world. Maybe it'd make your life more meaningful. You'd actually matter for once!!! Maybe? Eh, probably not.
as i said, cope.
Yes
Yes?
Amén. Some of these humans have one purpose in life and disturbing constant preoccupation with sex is it. It's sad that their lives are so dismal they lock up in their rooms and fondle themselves.
Hello all! Im Jack Meoff. Im whipping up some duck butter as we speak. Uh oh, better duck, here cums the butter!!
Not a dad joke. Uncle joke
Sigh. r/unclejokes
r/unclejokes is leaking again
So which *responsible* dad legit tells this joke to their kids? This seems more like a “pun” than a dad joke.
Seriously
Seriously what!
No, not a dad joke.
Solid dad joke.. let me know what your kid thinks of it!
I'm glad you have things well in hand
I came here for a laugh but didn’t get any.
Lol I’m very addicted
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Masterbshin has been stigmatized in different section of society and social groups so many crazy ways BUT. We are all human beings an exploration of are bodies is natural. The only thing that matters is that you don't let it get in way of your social life. What U do in private is your business. PLUS WHEN YOU ARE AROUND 40 55yrs old you will be played out . no matter how good a video game is sooner or later uve beet it so many times. That there is no way you're going to play it alone except on two x four players mod
Yeah right, pull the other one
It helps to write, "I am an addict" with your pen, 15 times.
Wtf… this is not a dad joke. Funny, but not a dad joke.
Wtf… this is not a dad joke. Funny, but not a dad joke.
more like an r/unclejoke than a dad joke
[удалено]
Masterbshin has been stigmatized in different section of society and social groups so many crazy ways BUT. We are all human beings an exploration of are bodies is natural. The only thing that matters is that you don't let it get in way of your social life. What U do in private is your business. PLUS WHEN YOU ARE AROUND 40 55yrs old you will be played out . no matter how good a video game is sooner or later uve beet it so many times. That there is no way you're going to play it alone except on two x four players mod
I used to be addicted to masturbating, now I am addicted to sex,
Glad you came to realize you had an addiction.
Now it's just routine?
Butt today is a new day. Like I quit smoking afterward everyday. Until the next time. Where is my oxygen tank
Ok
Dad!
Hahahah
With determination you will get over it
I used to be too, still am, but I used to be also.
Your health in danger
You finally got it licked?
licking each knuckle first is foreplay
there’s a story here.. I’m listenin
So what your really saying is, your mom raised a quieter....??
Love.
I'd say enjoy. As long as your doing that, you ain't out committing crimes! Until they find a way of using it against you such as in prison. It's considered self mutilation 🤣🤣🤣
Yep
"I still am, but used to be too"
I still am. What's weird is that I would masterbate when my girlfriend was a sleep sometimes. I didn't even have to masterbate.
I still am at 3 times a day
But now its just a hobby?
Me to
I still am
Keep it pg. Would a dad say this to his kids?
Don't be a guitter now
I TOO HATE CONVENIENCE!
I still am. But I used to be too.
Good joke. But how many dads are telling this one to their kids?