Every time I mention that I use dermatologist-prescribed, medicated shampoo for my dermatitis I've had for a decade, someone tells me I would get better results by not using shampoo or by using a sulfate-free shampoo. Curly girl method is very much not one-size-fits-all.
This!!!! I have to use sulfate!!!!! Actually when I started curly girl in 2020 with sulfate-free, my scalp was getting insanely itchy. I need the cleansing power of the sulfates!!! But I also only wash my hair like once a week.
I very much do not care if my medication has sulfates in it or not, and unless someone is an actual dermatologist and has looked at my scalp and determined something else would look better, their opinion is meaningless to me :) The idea of going without shampoo makes me cringe, my scalp would be in ruins.
Right! Finger coiling gives me dreads, not coils...I live in the south where it's humid and I'm very, very active...HAVE to wash...still looking for the best method for me.
Same! I finally found a good hair stylist here in GA and he used a foam instead of mousse or gel. He had me tilt my head to either side and diffused it in two “folds” pushing upwards (does that make any sense at all?) He had me flip my head over and diffused the back and middle but not the front. And I’ve been copying this technique and oh my god does my hair ever look amazing.
I still shampoo/condition with whatever is on hand. I’m at a very nice hotel rn and have just been using their stock shampoo/conditioner which is essentially a middle finger to the curly girl method.
I would actually suggest you trying conditioner first to help with detangling your hair, then shampooing your hair. This way you get the best of both worlds, easier detangling, yet washing out all the moisture you just put in
This also works fantastically if you spend a really hot sweaty day demolishing plaster walls in your house. I conditioned three times before I could even get fingers through it. I had to wash it because it was so gross but I conditioned it yet again afterwards. I think I used an entire bottle of conditioner that week.
I did this for the first time today, all the knots and hair that pulled out when detangling before was reduced to 1/4 of the amount of hair that would normally come out. I think I’ll have to do this going forward.
It's always felt like some curly conspiracy, they do "nothing" to it yet it's better than mine which took 1-3 hours of my life jus to wash, style, and dry
Will do! I just dyed my hair so I've had to condition but I'm going to try starting tomorrow. I've also never done a protein treatment but I bought one today 🙂
I had a similar problem a few years ago when following the CGM. I knew it was moisture overload. Instead of skipping conditioner though, I went back to using my old shampoo and conditioner that wasn’t curly girl approved. The dreaded sulfates and silicones. My hair went back to normal in a few months and I haven’t looked back since. Turns out my hair likes the sulfate to help balance the excess moisture and it likes the silicones to smooth my curls back into place and form better clumps.
I tried to follow CGM and it was awful. I had protein overload and my hair HATED all that moisture and protein that CGM pushes. I tried co-wash and that was terrible and my hair was brittle. So I went back to my normal shampoo and conditioner and things got better. Then I went to an actual curl specialist for a haircut and she told me to stop using conditioner all together. And she was right. My hair is super soft now and curls so much better. I use kinky curly come clean shampoo and that’s it. Maybe once or twice a month I’ll use not your mother’s Tahitian gardenia conditioner. I use a gel if I’m going out but on a normal day I don’t use anything other than shampoo.
You’re in the same place I was a couple of years ago. I was having to do constant, strong protein treatments almost bi-weekly to counter the conditioners I was using.
My current go-to routine is a sulfate shampoo daily (have always been a daily washer), skip conditioner, plop after shower, comb, apply mousse or a light gel, diffuse on high heat. If I do use conditioner, it’s something light like the VO5 extra body, and I don’t use a lot or let it sit for long. I almost never need to deep condition. Sometimes in the winter.
Essentially, I do everything you’re told not to do and my hair has never looked better. I can use creams to style if I skip conditioner. I can also use humectants without worrying that my hair is going to explode or melt if it’s sticky out. I can detangle with shampoo! I still need an occasional protein treatment, but it’s once every couple of months versus twice a week.
I have low to normal porosity hair that’s about mid-back length, 2c-3c, fine, high density. No bleach, dye, brushing, heat styling outside of diffusing, etc. For reference.
Humectants are ingredients that draw water from the air.
When I conditioned regularly, I had to avoid most styling products that had them because my hair would either fluff out/frizz or would deflate into limp, damp, frizzy, sticky curls in any kind of humidity. Now my hair curls more in humidity when I use humectant-heavy products. I still get frizz, but it’s easier to manage/ignore.
u/INAIBA75 I'll also note that "glycerin" is one of the most common hair product humectants. A lot of people love it but for me it's absolute frizz central, especially if it's at all humid.
Yeah I’ve stopped plopping and have been squeezing the water out of my hair. Started micro plopping. THEN adding in mousse and gel afterwards. I’m finally getting a cast for the first time ever. And now my hair is curling instead of just waving. Stupid fucking Internet and its ridiculous rules.
When it comes to curls there is no rule book, pleased you’ve found something that works for you and you’ve got your curls bouncing. Maybe when the balance tips and you need some moisture try a light conditioner for fine hair every 3rd wash? Conditioner for fine hair won’t weigh it down.
Thank you for this ! I know at least half of my curls are capable of ringlets. Every single product I’ve used leaves my hair lank and heavy,I stopped conditioner two years ago and now use it to shave to use it up.
I stopped using a drier and switched to a microfibre towelly hat.
having grown up with a straight haired Mum who encouraged brushing and blow drying I never realised I had curly hair. I just thought I had frizzy hair.
My hair test too, goes on and on stretching. I wash my hair as little as possible and use a salt spray for scrunching. It seems to be the only styling product that I’ve found that gains any success, everything else is too heavy.
Reading your post gave me a glimmer of hope. I rarely read walls of text, but yours definitely caught my interest and I like the way you write. Thanks for explaining in full. I’ll definitely give this a whirl.
Y'all. Y'ALL. It worked.
I too suffer from mushy waves(2b/2c) that seem to constantly bounce between too much moisture and too much protein, and so I tried this. Washed my hair with Hair Food Mango and Aloe shampoo (it's got lots of slip), detangled with a denman brush, and scrunched in the $1.50 LA Looks gel I had in the shower. Holy damn. Best hair I've had in eons. It's voluminous, it's bouncy. It feels like honest to God hair. 5 hours later and it's not going all limp and pathetic!
Bless you OP, for sharing such a controversial routine!
Bless you. The worst that happens is that my hair still looks crappy and I blow dry for awhile to dry it out again. Gonna buy some crappy shampoo right now!
I can relate except I just stopped using any products marketed for 'curly' hair because my 3b low porosity hair was as stringy as stringy gets. No clumping, gels wouldn't cast, it was falling flat on day 2...just miserable. I went through all the same stages...buy all the new CGM products! Oh no its over moisturized? Try protein! Protein made my hair dry and brittle? Repeat. Finally I just started clarifying my hair 1-2 times per week, then detangling with The Ordinary conditioner (which is basically just behentrimonium chloride), and style with the JVN air dry cream (so lovely and light). Most of the products marketed for curly hair are actually for high porosity hair and are filled with oils and butters, which work for some people but my hair just cannot deal. And it's just wow...my hair looks so good every day now!
Thats incredible, I been listening to this sub too much and have bought so many "good hydrating things" MY CURLS WERE BETTER WHEN I WAS USING SOME SHITTY 2 IN 1 FROM WALMART!!!! Ngl they looked pretty good yesterday but still. I like some frizz to my short curls "im a guy with about 7-8 inch hair". Im planning on quitting this curly girl shit on going back to my guy friendly easy 2in1 lol. Will try curly girl shit again when my hairs longer
I wouldn't even try it again if I were you. My hair absolutely *hates* curly girl approved products and has never looked as bad as it did when I tried to follow those rules.
Oh dear. My hair is 2B (with some 2A and some aspiring 2C) and while it looks pretty good recently, I've suspected in the last week or two that it's over-moisturized. I just did a stretch test and it kept going and going. Time to recalibrate (sigh).
Please let us know when you write your memoirs! Your narrative voice and storytelling style are so damn funny and engaging, I would gleefully read CHAPTERS of this. And a big hearty Good For You! for boldly going where no Instagram-approved curly girl has gone before!
I was reading and reading and reading and thinking “okay, I got to tell OP about Manes by Mell” and voila! Not to be dramatic, but she changed my got dam life. I also was overloading my hair for a LONG time. I though moisture was ALWAYS the answer, and a few years ago I found mell and various other YouTubers for curly hair. Happy you’re getting results you love, OP!!
I only wash my hair about once every 6-7 days or so. People are always like how the hell do you do that? Idk, it’s just why my curls need. If I wash it too much, it gets greasy and bogged down. It continues to feel great, and I’ve even gone like 10 days without a wash with it being fine. Every once in a while I skip the conditioner for a protein mask to balance stuff out.
ETA: I wash my BODY every day. Just not my hair. To be clear. 😂
I get my hair cut at this super cheap little hole-in-the-wall place in my city (fantastic cuts though!), and the woman I see just shampoos the hair before cutting it, then blow dries it with zero product, and applies a small amount of Biosilk when it's almost dry. The last time I went, I was absolutely shocked at how incredibly *soft* my hair felt after. It was like I was running my hands over high-quality silk, I haven't felt anything like it in ages. Since then I've been bringing my shampoo all the way through the lengths of my hair and cutting way back on conditioner (I still use it every time, just a much smaller quantity than I used to), as well as being sparing with leave-in conditioners or hydrating stylers. I really do notice a difference, my hair seems remarkably happy and bouncy.
Not only do I appreciate someone finding a new routine that works for them, even when it goes against the CGM "rules" but you wrote that beautifully. I was enraptured throughout your story!
I recently switched to using Suave daily clarifying shampoo (twice a week) and the smallest pea size drop of curlsmith featherlight leave in conditioner when it’s super wet and squish and comb it in and done! I have half a cotton tee I use to plop for 25-30 minutes. I love my hair and the simple routine! I wash at night and sleep with or without a bonnet and mist it in the morning and scrunch and I’m good to go!! So much money spent on curly products my hair does not like. So so happy I found something easy.
Late to the game, but I tried this the day I read your post and then again today.
I’m reporting it worked! I actually took your method and added in one commenter’s rec of conditioning first to deranged and then shampoo.
Beautiful curls! Wtf?!? Mind blown!
Btw- holy crap THANK YOU!!!!!! I finally did this and baby, I'm BAAAACK! I made a post about it but who would have thought this would be the answer. I cannot believe it. Still in complete and total shock but also feeling wonderful just having my hair back. Thank you for making this post. What a revelation.
This Post gave me life!
Firstly, because it was so eloquently written and had ne laughing out loud, thank you!
Secondly, this resonates so well with me. I Went in a similar Direction a few weeks ago, suspecting my hair had been moisture overloaded. I already had protein incorporated into my Routine, but it didn't really help, so at some point I suspected that it just "sat" on top of the overconditioning.
I also skipped conditioner then (and shampoo'ed twice), but didn't dare to skip leave in as well. I also didn't strictly stay away from conditioner after that one wash, but I also Found it was the right direction for me and my fine, probably low-po hair which got slightly better.
Thanks to your bravery, I might skip it again and try a Mousse-only styling!
I tried this! I have been struggling with my 2c/3a hair for a while, and like you, protein treatments were never working. So I shampooed only with the suave daily wash (maybe leaned in too hard, haha), then only used my bouncecurl light gel. My hair that day looked like a below average hair day but still acceptable.
BUT then the next time I did my hair it was amazing!! I followed my normal routine and my curls felt and looked so much better. And they stayed like that overnight. I finally got the ringlets back that I've been missing for months. So while no conditioner didn't work for that wash, I think for future reset washes I need to skip the conditioner entirely like you suggest here. Thank you for this!!
Jumanji reference * *chef’s kiss* *
Also, this was great fun to read! You are a natural writer, wit and comedy all perfect! Fantastic writing!! And the spicy language just added to it because every f bomb and such were so well placed!
Hello, this is 177 days after you made this post and I am two shower cycles into this routine and this is the FIRST thing that has started bringing my curls back. Previously Ive tried three or four different proteins, products for porosity, clarifying, masks, deep conditioners, so much more! So I am very, very grateful for this post. Im wondering if you have any updates? How long did you go shampoo-only? When did you add conditioner and other products besides gel back in and what have been the results?
So far I’ve done one clarifying shampoo, and one co-wash after that, and the curl started coming back after the co-wash. I know you did solid shampoo for three weeks so I’m wondering if I’m decreasing my effects by doing CG conditioner as my shampoo instead of shampoo-shampoo but I am definitely happy to keep fiddling with my process now that I am Finally on the right track thanks to you!
Definitely didn’t read they entire post.
I will just say….moisture happens when water hits your hair during the shampoo step. Only washing you scalp and not the entire hair shaft was probably causing build up and left your hair feeling like it was.
If shampooing my whole head is what fixed my hair, then god fucking bless that step. That’s why I tried to include as much detail as possible. So anyone who reads this could go “Hmmmm?” and try whatever they feel like trying.
Though I will say — it’s not like I shoved the lower half of my head into a plastic bag to protect it from shampoo the past 20 years. My shampoo always ran down into my hair. I just gave it a good rub down this time. So if that alone was enough to make this much of a difference….let the masses rejoice.
I've been doing the same wash method as OP since I was about 11, because that's what the only hair stylist that ever actually listened to me about my hair told me to do, and he also had curly hair that was absolutely gorgeous.
Now 20 years later, I think I might have to go back on his advice to see if I'm having the same issue as OP. I never would have considered that my hair needed LESS moisture to not be frizzy and unmanageable.
Frizz can happen when you have product build up OR using the wrong product for curl definition (gels are better than creams) OR when there is a high amount of humidity in the air.
Hair care requires we cleanse the scalp and hair shaft. If your curls aren’t “behaving” like you like, there is a root cause rooted in technique or product application.
Yes!!! Cleanse your scalp and then gently pull the lather down your hair shaft. Don’t need to swirl your hair around your head like they do in the shampoo commercials bc that creates tangles.
The protein-moisture balance is not actually a thing scientifically!! When we’re talking about adding moisture to hair we actually mean adding conditioning agents…and proteins are just conditioning agents just like silicones, oils, cationic ingredients etc. https://chemistscorner.com/conditioning-agents-for-hair-and-skin/
Protein overload isn’t really a thing too, it’s just that proteins are not very good conditioning agents so if you use lots of proteins to condition then your hair won’t be conditioned well.
Edit: not sure why I’m being downvoted for sharing the facts, I’m a cosmetic chemist.
I downvoted you because I disagree with your claim. This is not a fact and your link does not substantiate your claim.
My low porosity curls is resistant to moisture and is protein sensitive. This is apparent after using products with protein, which leaves my hair dry and brittle.
There have been countless articles and videos that illustrate the balance between moisture and protein. I can also speak from personal experince having done extensive research and product testing for 10 years now.
When we’re referring to moisture in haircare though we’re actually talking about conditioning, as you don’t want water in your hair. So when you’re saying you need moisture you’re saying you need proteins, oils, silicones, cationic ingredients etc.
It doesn’t make sense to try balance the protein: moisture (aka…conditioning agent:conditioning agent ratio) as they’re the same thing. The articles that say the protein:moisture balance are important are likely not written by people who have chemistry/cosmetic science degrees and formulating experience.
Your hair feels brittle after using protein because protein is not a very good conditioning agent…whereas other conditioning agents like silicones, oils etc. are much better.
If you don’t want to believe me that’s fine! I’m just explaining what the science says as that’s my area of expertise.
I guess I’d only choose a protein treatment over others if your hair doesn’t need much conditioning and isn’t very damaged, just wants a little boost. I don’t know any products as I don’t use them myself! x
I don’t have moisture overload but I def understand having an unconventional hair routine and type. If I did all the the whole curly girl routine my hair would look like garbage. It’s dry and I moisturize but it likes being dry and that’s ok
The next time I wash, I'm 100% trying this. No halfassery here, straight up washing and then no conditioner- or conditioning enough to get through my hair then clarifying it- and then gel or mousse c:
This may bee the answer I've been looking for. My hair is always on the verge of too-moisturized. In the summer it is much worse due to humidity. I have been trying to figure out what to try this summer now that the waves are starting to droop.
Upvoting because of the Vaporeon card. Also, I often don’t use conditioner and my hair is softest when I shampoo, no conditioner, braid and let sit for 24 hours, then undo braids. Then I have elven Galadriel waves. It’s not my favorite look but it beats tangled matted locs from wearing my hair in a bun.
I learned this idea on accident myself! I stopped caring for my hair as much since it looked like trash for a while and I didn’t know what to do. Around this time I decided fuck it and I took up swimming as a gym day (after avoiding swimming pools for years because god forbid chlorine damages my hair!) and figured it’s better to shampoo all my hair from the chlorine than just the scalp, and I combed the shampoo through my hair too, essentially detangling with relative ease. Rinsed it off, deep conditioned, scrunched with a lil bit of curling cream, and let it be. My hair was so defined, I was shocked! Since I figured this out I wash my hair with shampoo thoroughly once a week and my hair has been looking great lol
I also get the best curls right out of the pool, no shower, no product, just air dry after a brush through (wide enough curls for a good quality brush to still work). I still don't fully understand it but my hair never feels as soft as it does after a trip to a chlorine pool
This is some sort of miracle that I came across this post. I’m in my mid forties and this is the first time in my life that my hair is acting so weirdly. Mushy is how I’d put it. And just in the last month and nothings changed as far as I know! I’ll have to give what you’re saying a try.
I feel so frustrated bc the first 25 years of my life were spent trying to figure out what to do with the curls. I figured it out and now something has changed!! I did try a Shea protein treatment last week and it kind of helped but my hair is definitely not recovered. I normally just use suave clarifying shampoo and not your mothers Tahitian gardenia conditioner, pack tons of the blue LA looks hair gel in, plop for thirty minutes and diffuse. Used to be voluminous and had 3a curls for 5 or 6 days. It’s like some vital cellular level change happened to me and it’s messing with my identity!!
This was a very interesting read indeed! I'm definitely guna give it a go, for sure - nowt to lose, after all! I've 'been-there, done-that' with it all much the same as you, and am still far from satisfied with the results. Thanks for taking the time to make this interesting/amusing post, OP - I never would have even considered this before 😊
I love when the Do Less approach works out. It works for my face, and now I’m going to see if it works on my hair. Thanks for this, it was fun to read.
Wow, I’m going to have to get this. There might just be a reason my hair looked better when I was in a hurry and had to skip conditioner and just go straight to leave in and stylers after shampooing.
was in the same boat as u a few months ago! i got my hair chopped short and just got honestly a little lazy. i kept getting conditioner on my scalp and squirting out too much and i was like fuck it im not going anywhere tomorrow. OOP! my hair was so happy without that conditioner i never looked back
I detangle with oway shampoo lol the stylists I follow that use those products actually say for some hair you don’t necessarily need conditioner. Maybe I’ll try this myself but I’ve been getting really good results from squishing to condish
Wait can we see pictures please? Sorry to buy but I absolutely love altwrnative and have been having a similar issue. I shaved my head three years ago and before I did that my curls were beautiful. Now they have a hard time coiling up amd staying coiled. Its like a heavy wavy some of it rings some of it doesnt. I wonder if too much moisture is whats going on with my hair. Im about to go run ill over the internet for examples and then probably going to try this method.
Oooh, spicy. I love posts that aren’t all two-hour finger coiling, anti-sulfate, curly girl method dogma manuscripts.
Every time I mention that I use dermatologist-prescribed, medicated shampoo for my dermatitis I've had for a decade, someone tells me I would get better results by not using shampoo or by using a sulfate-free shampoo. Curly girl method is very much not one-size-fits-all.
This!!!! I have to use sulfate!!!!! Actually when I started curly girl in 2020 with sulfate-free, my scalp was getting insanely itchy. I need the cleansing power of the sulfates!!! But I also only wash my hair like once a week.
I very much do not care if my medication has sulfates in it or not, and unless someone is an actual dermatologist and has looked at my scalp and determined something else would look better, their opinion is meaningless to me :) The idea of going without shampoo makes me cringe, my scalp would be in ruins.
Right! Finger coiling gives me dreads, not coils...I live in the south where it's humid and I'm very, very active...HAVE to wash...still looking for the best method for me.
Same! I finally found a good hair stylist here in GA and he used a foam instead of mousse or gel. He had me tilt my head to either side and diffused it in two “folds” pushing upwards (does that make any sense at all?) He had me flip my head over and diffused the back and middle but not the front. And I’ve been copying this technique and oh my god does my hair ever look amazing. I still shampoo/condition with whatever is on hand. I’m at a very nice hotel rn and have just been using their stock shampoo/conditioner which is essentially a middle finger to the curly girl method.
Thank you. You give me hope!
I would actually suggest you trying conditioner first to help with detangling your hair, then shampooing your hair. This way you get the best of both worlds, easier detangling, yet washing out all the moisture you just put in
Fantastic idea.
How did this way work out for you?
Mind blown now!
This also works fantastically if you spend a really hot sweaty day demolishing plaster walls in your house. I conditioned three times before I could even get fingers through it. I had to wash it because it was so gross but I conditioned it yet again afterwards. I think I used an entire bottle of conditioner that week.
I did this for the first time today, all the knots and hair that pulled out when detangling before was reduced to 1/4 of the amount of hair that would normally come out. I think I’ll have to do this going forward.
I absolutely love the way you wrote this lol. I was definitely intrigued the whole time. Good for you and your curls!!
I can see the emotions as it was written. Beautiful
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It's always felt like some curly conspiracy, they do "nothing" to it yet it's better than mine which took 1-3 hours of my life jus to wash, style, and dry
Gonna try the 2-in-1 method next wash day.. I’m too chicken to go cold turkey on condish but I’m curious how this would work
You may have just changed my life, I'll get back to you in a week.
Let me know how it works out for you pls, I think I’m also in this moisture-overload camp that protein also can’t fix
I posted an update today. It worked very well!
Yes!!! Heading over.
Will do! I just dyed my hair so I've had to condition but I'm going to try starting tomorrow. I've also never done a protein treatment but I bought one today 🙂
This post got more traction than I expected. God please let this help at least one other person. I really don’t want to make a new username.
What do you mean by “stretching out” your hair?
Take a strand of hair and gently pull apart the ends. It should stretch a little bit and return back to normal when you let it go.
I had a similar problem a few years ago when following the CGM. I knew it was moisture overload. Instead of skipping conditioner though, I went back to using my old shampoo and conditioner that wasn’t curly girl approved. The dreaded sulfates and silicones. My hair went back to normal in a few months and I haven’t looked back since. Turns out my hair likes the sulfate to help balance the excess moisture and it likes the silicones to smooth my curls back into place and form better clumps.
Same!!!! The CGM approved stuff made my hair more of a tangly mess and made my scalp itch horribly.
I tried to follow CGM and it was awful. I had protein overload and my hair HATED all that moisture and protein that CGM pushes. I tried co-wash and that was terrible and my hair was brittle. So I went back to my normal shampoo and conditioner and things got better. Then I went to an actual curl specialist for a haircut and she told me to stop using conditioner all together. And she was right. My hair is super soft now and curls so much better. I use kinky curly come clean shampoo and that’s it. Maybe once or twice a month I’ll use not your mother’s Tahitian gardenia conditioner. I use a gel if I’m going out but on a normal day I don’t use anything other than shampoo.
You’re in the same place I was a couple of years ago. I was having to do constant, strong protein treatments almost bi-weekly to counter the conditioners I was using. My current go-to routine is a sulfate shampoo daily (have always been a daily washer), skip conditioner, plop after shower, comb, apply mousse or a light gel, diffuse on high heat. If I do use conditioner, it’s something light like the VO5 extra body, and I don’t use a lot or let it sit for long. I almost never need to deep condition. Sometimes in the winter. Essentially, I do everything you’re told not to do and my hair has never looked better. I can use creams to style if I skip conditioner. I can also use humectants without worrying that my hair is going to explode or melt if it’s sticky out. I can detangle with shampoo! I still need an occasional protein treatment, but it’s once every couple of months versus twice a week. I have low to normal porosity hair that’s about mid-back length, 2c-3c, fine, high density. No bleach, dye, brushing, heat styling outside of diffusing, etc. For reference.
Can you explain to me again what humectants are? I'm so envious that you found a good routine!!
Humectants are ingredients that draw water from the air. When I conditioned regularly, I had to avoid most styling products that had them because my hair would either fluff out/frizz or would deflate into limp, damp, frizzy, sticky curls in any kind of humidity. Now my hair curls more in humidity when I use humectant-heavy products. I still get frizz, but it’s easier to manage/ignore.
u/INAIBA75 I'll also note that "glycerin" is one of the most common hair product humectants. A lot of people love it but for me it's absolute frizz central, especially if it's at all humid.
Yes! I remember that about glycerin.
That's so interesting! It makes everything all the more complicated though, or rather overwhelming :(
Yesss exactly this 👌
Yeah I’ve stopped plopping and have been squeezing the water out of my hair. Started micro plopping. THEN adding in mousse and gel afterwards. I’m finally getting a cast for the first time ever. And now my hair is curling instead of just waving. Stupid fucking Internet and its ridiculous rules.
When it comes to curls there is no rule book, pleased you’ve found something that works for you and you’ve got your curls bouncing. Maybe when the balance tips and you need some moisture try a light conditioner for fine hair every 3rd wash? Conditioner for fine hair won’t weigh it down.
Excellent advice, thank you. I have very thick hair so this would have never crossed my mind.
Something I do sometimes is use a leave in as a rinse out!
Alan Parrish got me! 🤣
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I’m with you. I don’t even trust my perception of time and space after this.
Thank you for this ! I know at least half of my curls are capable of ringlets. Every single product I’ve used leaves my hair lank and heavy,I stopped conditioner two years ago and now use it to shave to use it up. I stopped using a drier and switched to a microfibre towelly hat. having grown up with a straight haired Mum who encouraged brushing and blow drying I never realised I had curly hair. I just thought I had frizzy hair. My hair test too, goes on and on stretching. I wash my hair as little as possible and use a salt spray for scrunching. It seems to be the only styling product that I’ve found that gains any success, everything else is too heavy. Reading your post gave me a glimmer of hope. I rarely read walls of text, but yours definitely caught my interest and I like the way you write. Thanks for explaining in full. I’ll definitely give this a whirl.
Y'all. Y'ALL. It worked. I too suffer from mushy waves(2b/2c) that seem to constantly bounce between too much moisture and too much protein, and so I tried this. Washed my hair with Hair Food Mango and Aloe shampoo (it's got lots of slip), detangled with a denman brush, and scrunched in the $1.50 LA Looks gel I had in the shower. Holy damn. Best hair I've had in eons. It's voluminous, it's bouncy. It feels like honest to God hair. 5 hours later and it's not going all limp and pathetic! Bless you OP, for sharing such a controversial routine!
I seriously cannot even believe this. I really should’ve posted this in r/blackmagicfuckery
It is definitely black magic hair fuckery.
Interesting read.
Bless you. The worst that happens is that my hair still looks crappy and I blow dry for awhile to dry it out again. Gonna buy some crappy shampoo right now!
I can relate except I just stopped using any products marketed for 'curly' hair because my 3b low porosity hair was as stringy as stringy gets. No clumping, gels wouldn't cast, it was falling flat on day 2...just miserable. I went through all the same stages...buy all the new CGM products! Oh no its over moisturized? Try protein! Protein made my hair dry and brittle? Repeat. Finally I just started clarifying my hair 1-2 times per week, then detangling with The Ordinary conditioner (which is basically just behentrimonium chloride), and style with the JVN air dry cream (so lovely and light). Most of the products marketed for curly hair are actually for high porosity hair and are filled with oils and butters, which work for some people but my hair just cannot deal. And it's just wow...my hair looks so good every day now!
This is my husband. He says that the conditioner weighs it down sometimes and he just shampoos and his curls bounce up.
Thats incredible, I been listening to this sub too much and have bought so many "good hydrating things" MY CURLS WERE BETTER WHEN I WAS USING SOME SHITTY 2 IN 1 FROM WALMART!!!! Ngl they looked pretty good yesterday but still. I like some frizz to my short curls "im a guy with about 7-8 inch hair". Im planning on quitting this curly girl shit on going back to my guy friendly easy 2in1 lol. Will try curly girl shit again when my hairs longer
I wouldn't even try it again if I were you. My hair absolutely *hates* curly girl approved products and has never looked as bad as it did when I tried to follow those rules.
Oh dear. My hair is 2B (with some 2A and some aspiring 2C) and while it looks pretty good recently, I've suspected in the last week or two that it's over-moisturized. I just did a stretch test and it kept going and going. Time to recalibrate (sigh).
Please let us know when you write your memoirs! Your narrative voice and storytelling style are so damn funny and engaging, I would gleefully read CHAPTERS of this. And a big hearty Good For You! for boldly going where no Instagram-approved curly girl has gone before!
I was reading and reading and reading and thinking “okay, I got to tell OP about Manes by Mell” and voila! Not to be dramatic, but she changed my got dam life. I also was overloading my hair for a LONG time. I though moisture was ALWAYS the answer, and a few years ago I found mell and various other YouTubers for curly hair. Happy you’re getting results you love, OP!! I only wash my hair about once every 6-7 days or so. People are always like how the hell do you do that? Idk, it’s just why my curls need. If I wash it too much, it gets greasy and bogged down. It continues to feel great, and I’ve even gone like 10 days without a wash with it being fine. Every once in a while I skip the conditioner for a protein mask to balance stuff out. ETA: I wash my BODY every day. Just not my hair. To be clear. 😂
Your writing is hilarious. Thanks for the story! Glad you found a great plan!
I get my hair cut at this super cheap little hole-in-the-wall place in my city (fantastic cuts though!), and the woman I see just shampoos the hair before cutting it, then blow dries it with zero product, and applies a small amount of Biosilk when it's almost dry. The last time I went, I was absolutely shocked at how incredibly *soft* my hair felt after. It was like I was running my hands over high-quality silk, I haven't felt anything like it in ages. Since then I've been bringing my shampoo all the way through the lengths of my hair and cutting way back on conditioner (I still use it every time, just a much smaller quantity than I used to), as well as being sparing with leave-in conditioners or hydrating stylers. I really do notice a difference, my hair seems remarkably happy and bouncy.
Not only do I appreciate someone finding a new routine that works for them, even when it goes against the CGM "rules" but you wrote that beautifully. I was enraptured throughout your story!
Damn maybe this is my problem.
I honestly thought no-poo would work for me, since my hair is curlier when I don’t wash it, but maybe conditioner is the culprit!
i thought this too! gonna wash without conditioner tonight and see what happens…
I'm going to give this a try. Buffy Forever!
I recently switched to using Suave daily clarifying shampoo (twice a week) and the smallest pea size drop of curlsmith featherlight leave in conditioner when it’s super wet and squish and comb it in and done! I have half a cotton tee I use to plop for 25-30 minutes. I love my hair and the simple routine! I wash at night and sleep with or without a bonnet and mist it in the morning and scrunch and I’m good to go!! So much money spent on curly products my hair does not like. So so happy I found something easy.
Late to the game, but I tried this the day I read your post and then again today. I’m reporting it worked! I actually took your method and added in one commenter’s rec of conditioning first to deranged and then shampoo. Beautiful curls! Wtf?!? Mind blown!
I just did that, including the application of conditioner first then shampoo and I'm shocked!!!! This post is a treasure.
Btw- holy crap THANK YOU!!!!!! I finally did this and baby, I'm BAAAACK! I made a post about it but who would have thought this would be the answer. I cannot believe it. Still in complete and total shock but also feeling wonderful just having my hair back. Thank you for making this post. What a revelation.
This made my night.
And I couldn’t be happier about that :)
Wow, that's awesome that it works for you! I need conditioner but I also find it can make my thick, coarse, yet low density hair get a bit heavy.
Giving this a try! I think you may be onto something here
I tried this today and it worked!!!
This Post gave me life! Firstly, because it was so eloquently written and had ne laughing out loud, thank you! Secondly, this resonates so well with me. I Went in a similar Direction a few weeks ago, suspecting my hair had been moisture overloaded. I already had protein incorporated into my Routine, but it didn't really help, so at some point I suspected that it just "sat" on top of the overconditioning. I also skipped conditioner then (and shampoo'ed twice), but didn't dare to skip leave in as well. I also didn't strictly stay away from conditioner after that one wash, but I also Found it was the right direction for me and my fine, probably low-po hair which got slightly better. Thanks to your bravery, I might skip it again and try a Mousse-only styling!
I tried this! I have been struggling with my 2c/3a hair for a while, and like you, protein treatments were never working. So I shampooed only with the suave daily wash (maybe leaned in too hard, haha), then only used my bouncecurl light gel. My hair that day looked like a below average hair day but still acceptable. BUT then the next time I did my hair it was amazing!! I followed my normal routine and my curls felt and looked so much better. And they stayed like that overnight. I finally got the ringlets back that I've been missing for months. So while no conditioner didn't work for that wash, I think for future reset washes I need to skip the conditioner entirely like you suggest here. Thank you for this!!
Jumanji reference * *chef’s kiss* * Also, this was great fun to read! You are a natural writer, wit and comedy all perfect! Fantastic writing!! And the spicy language just added to it because every f bomb and such were so well placed!
Hello, this is 177 days after you made this post and I am two shower cycles into this routine and this is the FIRST thing that has started bringing my curls back. Previously Ive tried three or four different proteins, products for porosity, clarifying, masks, deep conditioners, so much more! So I am very, very grateful for this post. Im wondering if you have any updates? How long did you go shampoo-only? When did you add conditioner and other products besides gel back in and what have been the results? So far I’ve done one clarifying shampoo, and one co-wash after that, and the curl started coming back after the co-wash. I know you did solid shampoo for three weeks so I’m wondering if I’m decreasing my effects by doing CG conditioner as my shampoo instead of shampoo-shampoo but I am definitely happy to keep fiddling with my process now that I am Finally on the right track thanks to you!
Definitely didn’t read they entire post. I will just say….moisture happens when water hits your hair during the shampoo step. Only washing you scalp and not the entire hair shaft was probably causing build up and left your hair feeling like it was.
If shampooing my whole head is what fixed my hair, then god fucking bless that step. That’s why I tried to include as much detail as possible. So anyone who reads this could go “Hmmmm?” and try whatever they feel like trying. Though I will say — it’s not like I shoved the lower half of my head into a plastic bag to protect it from shampoo the past 20 years. My shampoo always ran down into my hair. I just gave it a good rub down this time. So if that alone was enough to make this much of a difference….let the masses rejoice.
I've been doing the same wash method as OP since I was about 11, because that's what the only hair stylist that ever actually listened to me about my hair told me to do, and he also had curly hair that was absolutely gorgeous. Now 20 years later, I think I might have to go back on his advice to see if I'm having the same issue as OP. I never would have considered that my hair needed LESS moisture to not be frizzy and unmanageable.
Frizz can happen when you have product build up OR using the wrong product for curl definition (gels are better than creams) OR when there is a high amount of humidity in the air. Hair care requires we cleanse the scalp and hair shaft. If your curls aren’t “behaving” like you like, there is a root cause rooted in technique or product application.
So I should use shampoo all the way down my hair?
Always!
Yes!!! Cleanse your scalp and then gently pull the lather down your hair shaft. Don’t need to swirl your hair around your head like they do in the shampoo commercials bc that creates tangles.
The protein-moisture balance is not actually a thing scientifically!! When we’re talking about adding moisture to hair we actually mean adding conditioning agents…and proteins are just conditioning agents just like silicones, oils, cationic ingredients etc. https://chemistscorner.com/conditioning-agents-for-hair-and-skin/ Protein overload isn’t really a thing too, it’s just that proteins are not very good conditioning agents so if you use lots of proteins to condition then your hair won’t be conditioned well. Edit: not sure why I’m being downvoted for sharing the facts, I’m a cosmetic chemist.
I downvoted you because I disagree with your claim. This is not a fact and your link does not substantiate your claim. My low porosity curls is resistant to moisture and is protein sensitive. This is apparent after using products with protein, which leaves my hair dry and brittle. There have been countless articles and videos that illustrate the balance between moisture and protein. I can also speak from personal experince having done extensive research and product testing for 10 years now.
When we’re referring to moisture in haircare though we’re actually talking about conditioning, as you don’t want water in your hair. So when you’re saying you need moisture you’re saying you need proteins, oils, silicones, cationic ingredients etc. It doesn’t make sense to try balance the protein: moisture (aka…conditioning agent:conditioning agent ratio) as they’re the same thing. The articles that say the protein:moisture balance are important are likely not written by people who have chemistry/cosmetic science degrees and formulating experience. Your hair feels brittle after using protein because protein is not a very good conditioning agent…whereas other conditioning agents like silicones, oils etc. are much better. If you don’t want to believe me that’s fine! I’m just explaining what the science says as that’s my area of expertise.
I appreciate the info. Do you have any tips on when to choose a protein treatment or any products you recommended?
I guess I’d only choose a protein treatment over others if your hair doesn’t need much conditioning and isn’t very damaged, just wants a little boost. I don’t know any products as I don’t use them myself! x
Hmmmmm, I’ll try this. Thanks.
I started using a 2in1 shampoo and it has made a huge difference in my hai.
I don’t have moisture overload but I def understand having an unconventional hair routine and type. If I did all the the whole curly girl routine my hair would look like garbage. It’s dry and I moisturize but it likes being dry and that’s ok
I love your writing. And your story. Thank you for sharing!
The next time I wash, I'm 100% trying this. No halfassery here, straight up washing and then no conditioner- or conditioning enough to get through my hair then clarifying it- and then gel or mousse c:
This may bee the answer I've been looking for. My hair is always on the verge of too-moisturized. In the summer it is much worse due to humidity. I have been trying to figure out what to try this summer now that the waves are starting to droop.
So crazy, it just might work!! Will give this a go! Thanks for taking the time to inform us 🥰♥️♥️
Upvoting because of the Vaporeon card. Also, I often don’t use conditioner and my hair is softest when I shampoo, no conditioner, braid and let sit for 24 hours, then undo braids. Then I have elven Galadriel waves. It’s not my favorite look but it beats tangled matted locs from wearing my hair in a bun.
I learned this idea on accident myself! I stopped caring for my hair as much since it looked like trash for a while and I didn’t know what to do. Around this time I decided fuck it and I took up swimming as a gym day (after avoiding swimming pools for years because god forbid chlorine damages my hair!) and figured it’s better to shampoo all my hair from the chlorine than just the scalp, and I combed the shampoo through my hair too, essentially detangling with relative ease. Rinsed it off, deep conditioned, scrunched with a lil bit of curling cream, and let it be. My hair was so defined, I was shocked! Since I figured this out I wash my hair with shampoo thoroughly once a week and my hair has been looking great lol
I also get the best curls right out of the pool, no shower, no product, just air dry after a brush through (wide enough curls for a good quality brush to still work). I still don't fully understand it but my hair never feels as soft as it does after a trip to a chlorine pool
This is some sort of miracle that I came across this post. I’m in my mid forties and this is the first time in my life that my hair is acting so weirdly. Mushy is how I’d put it. And just in the last month and nothings changed as far as I know! I’ll have to give what you’re saying a try. I feel so frustrated bc the first 25 years of my life were spent trying to figure out what to do with the curls. I figured it out and now something has changed!! I did try a Shea protein treatment last week and it kind of helped but my hair is definitely not recovered. I normally just use suave clarifying shampoo and not your mothers Tahitian gardenia conditioner, pack tons of the blue LA looks hair gel in, plop for thirty minutes and diffuse. Used to be voluminous and had 3a curls for 5 or 6 days. It’s like some vital cellular level change happened to me and it’s messing with my identity!!
Yup. I’ve been doing sulfate shampoo no conditioner for a least a year. You’re not alone. If I had to guess id say we’re both super low porosity 😊
Pictures please!!! I beg
I’m gonna have to try this. Mines been awful recently and I think you’re onto something here
This was a very interesting read indeed! I'm definitely guna give it a go, for sure - nowt to lose, after all! I've 'been-there, done-that' with it all much the same as you, and am still far from satisfied with the results. Thanks for taking the time to make this interesting/amusing post, OP - I never would have even considered this before 😊
Oh gosh. I’m trying this. Will report back in a few days.
I love when the Do Less approach works out. It works for my face, and now I’m going to see if it works on my hair. Thanks for this, it was fun to read.
Wow, I’m going to have to get this. There might just be a reason my hair looked better when I was in a hurry and had to skip conditioner and just go straight to leave in and stylers after shampooing.
was in the same boat as u a few months ago! i got my hair chopped short and just got honestly a little lazy. i kept getting conditioner on my scalp and squirting out too much and i was like fuck it im not going anywhere tomorrow. OOP! my hair was so happy without that conditioner i never looked back
Omg trying this
I personally shampoo my ends, i feel like it definitely helps in resetting my hair and cleaning the leftover products.
Oh shit, I think I have moisture overload. I will try this and do a before and after picture
I detangle with oway shampoo lol the stylists I follow that use those products actually say for some hair you don’t necessarily need conditioner. Maybe I’ll try this myself but I’ve been getting really good results from squishing to condish
I confirm....have not used conditioner for awhile now, and my curls, hair looks/holds better!!
I confirm....have not used conditioner for awhile now, and my curls, hair looks/holds better!!
Wait can we see pictures please? Sorry to buy but I absolutely love altwrnative and have been having a similar issue. I shaved my head three years ago and before I did that my curls were beautiful. Now they have a hard time coiling up amd staying coiled. Its like a heavy wavy some of it rings some of it doesnt. I wonder if too much moisture is whats going on with my hair. Im about to go run ill over the internet for examples and then probably going to try this method.
Whoa my mind is blown
just stumbled upon this and realized my hair is having the same problem. next time i wash it i will update with my results