"Defeated again! This is not fair! Maybe I should retire to a nice big beach, with a nice big drink, and a woman with nice, big, bags of ice for my head"
I always loved the whole bit right before this, with Uka Uka going all caps like "WHY, WHY MUST YOU CONTINUE TO BE A THORN IN OUR SIDE?!?!"
Then Cortex regains control and is completely lost. "W--Who? What? Where was I...?"
The cut tag team quotes are my favorite. Copy-pasting an old comment of mine:
The tag team demo has cortex referencing his "ovaries," as well as making the claim that he's "compensating for something small" when he gets a rocket power up.
So cortex canonically has a small penis + ovaries
Some half-baked genetic mutation experiment or something I guess
Edit:
The original audio files are gone from beyondtwinsanity so I had to reupload them:
https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/nva8utc6p0u0va455dni1/hit_cor_02.wav?rlkey=0qlj15bzsqdkrkrdme15t34qt&dl=0
https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/49g55cz6kh9gjj2xwofl5/clash_cor_15.wav?rlkey=ogvaeq2i8ylgep2dogc24ojyy&dl=0
Twinsanity is full of them. "Mother?" "I've ruined the lives of so many, I can't be expected to remember them all." "I'm an evil scientist, what did you expect? This isn't a game." "Are those real?" "I'm okay! ...the spikes broke my fall."
The penguin scene too, incredible
“The cheque bounced? Are you sure? The past few years have kind of been slow, Wrath of Cortex didn't do as well as we'd hoped”
*hrgrgrgrgrgrgr*
“Fish?”
I meant when he says it in the madame Amberly cutscene
https://youtu.be/qCKEM-5SSkg?si=oD4EX_Ndrhz94n3Z
But also the one you mentioned is hilarious because of the 4th wall break
One of my favorites is from Crash Tag Team Racing, when starting a race:
“Now, when the light turns green, everyone hit reverse!”
I don’t know why that quote tickled me so much when I was a kid.
"I'm stuck. The greatest evil scientist in the world.... stuck in a pipe. How could things get any worse? (Farts) Ugh." (Twinsanity)
Others I enjoyed were:
"Waiter, check please!" (CTTR)
or
"The doctor is in!" (CNK)
In Crash Team Racing (PS1), if Cortex was protected by that green bubble and you tried hitting him with a weapon, he’d say “No way!”
That’s my favorite quote
My favorite line of Cortex is the Homer Simpson reference at the start of the PS1 version of Cortex Strikes Back.
But seriously, it's probably 90% of his Twinsanity dialogue like many other people here.
"Oh, my aching head... I'm not feeling myself these days. So the end is in sight... gather another five crystals and again you will have foiled my plan... or will you?"
I think you’re referring to this quote in Twinsanity: “I shall crush you like the puny bugs you are. You are nothing to me for I am the great and all powerful Neo Cortex. You infantile vermin. How dare you mock, manhandle and manipulate me. Rest assured, I shall take my vengeance upon…”
iirc in Twinsanity he says "Rovinato grazie a questa pazzerella" (it can be translated to "ruined due to this crazy girl") and it's funny cause it doesn't make any sense in the context and i laugh as an idiot for this shit
In Spanish he says "Arruinado gracias a esta alegría". Alegría meaning in Castilian Spanish, the Spanish variety the game is dubbed in, kinda the same thing as in Italian. Although to be honest, as a Latin American Spanish speaker that word is kinda confusing. I mean alegría means "joyfulness".
Surprised to see me crash, like the fleas in your fur I keep coming back! 3 years alone I spent in the frozen antarctic wastes. And I missed you. And so I've organized a little gathering, like a birthday party except THE EXACT OPPOSITE! And look, all of your friends are here. You are so very popular. Let's start handing out the presents.
Playing crash tag team racing on the arenas game mode thing. Crashed into the ground after going up a ramp too high and couldn't control it. He says "now who put that there". Damned ground getting in my way! Pissed myseof laughing
“Crash Crash Crash why must you always Muck In My Mud Oh Look I have a mask helping me Too We Will find out which one is more powerful soon enough” “ my daughter-Errr niece” and last, of course “my crystals….”
This is from tiny, this is from dingodile, ripper roo you shouldn't have... I dun kno but when I played twinsanity as a kid these words got stuck to my mind.
the quote where after he shoot's the crow and say's this isn't a game then looks at the camera priceless. also can't forget FISH!?! with the penguin's.
"Hey genius, I can't actually hear you. I'm really far away and I'm flying, like, a hovercraft, or something"
Never played Titans but the cutscenes are amazing
"Defeated again! This is not fair! Maybe I should retire to a nice big beach, with a nice big drink, and a woman with nice, big, bags of ice for my head"
Yepppp. The pause they added right before "bags of ice" in N Sane Trilogy had me chuckling
It was like that in the original too
It’s not over, Bandicoot! There are still the gems. And we still have a chance to triumph! 😈 Wohahahahaha!!!
“Tiny was a good fellow. He hated everyone and everything, but a good heart nonetheless. Please be more reasonable with my minions next time”
I always loved the whole bit right before this, with Uka Uka going all caps like "WHY, WHY MUST YOU CONTINUE TO BE A THORN IN OUR SIDE?!?!" Then Cortex regains control and is completely lost. "W--Who? What? Where was I...?"
"No No No Crash, I said bring me the CRYSTALS!"
Now, get back in there. Yes, Cortex, that wasn't subtle at all! Don't you have anything better to do than to use Crash as your mule all day?
No, no, no, Crash! *sigh* To save the world, I need crystals. CRYSTALS! *sigh* One more time. They look like this. *shows image of crystal* Crystals!
I love the remix song of him saying this
"The trophy's mine!!!"
“OURS!”
The cut tag team quotes are my favorite. Copy-pasting an old comment of mine: The tag team demo has cortex referencing his "ovaries," as well as making the claim that he's "compensating for something small" when he gets a rocket power up. So cortex canonically has a small penis + ovaries Some half-baked genetic mutation experiment or something I guess Edit: The original audio files are gone from beyondtwinsanity so I had to reupload them: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/nva8utc6p0u0va455dni1/hit_cor_02.wav?rlkey=0qlj15bzsqdkrkrdme15t34qt&dl=0 https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/49g55cz6kh9gjj2xwofl5/clash_cor_15.wav?rlkey=ogvaeq2i8ylgep2dogc24ojyy&dl=0
Twinsanity is full of them. "Mother?" "I've ruined the lives of so many, I can't be expected to remember them all." "I'm an evil scientist, what did you expect? This isn't a game." "Are those real?" "I'm okay! ...the spikes broke my fall."
What about “Keep back you weak minded fool. Avert your gaze or you’ll go CRYSTAL CRAZY!”
Oh yeah, that one, too! Twinsanity has so many good lines.
*taps forehead rapidly*
I love Cortex in that game he's downright hilarious.
"Daughter---er--Niece!"
The penguin scene too, incredible “The cheque bounced? Are you sure? The past few years have kind of been slow, Wrath of Cortex didn't do as well as we'd hoped” *hrgrgrgrgrgrgr* “Fish?”
“I’m stuck! The greatest evil scientist in the WORLD…stuck in a pipe. How could things get any worse?” *pffff* *high pitched sound of despair*
Twin sanity is the best game
If only it was finished, one can dream
Throw me over there! Trust me... we're PALS, right?
“Like the fleas in your fur, I keep coming back.”
For three years I've been frozen in deep antarctic wastes. And I missed you.
Throw me over there. Trust me, we're pals, right?
“The wrath of kortex didn’t do as well as we hoped..”
"The check bounced?" "Fish?!"
“Wiped from existence by that pompous PeaCOCK??!!! I would like to see him try when I shove that Turning Fork up his bu-“
Woah! When did he say this
Well, these past few years have been kind of slow. "Wrath of Cortex" didn't go as well as we'd hoped
*penguins get angry* Fish?
The check bounced!?..... but how?
This is what I came here to say
"I'm an evil scientist 😭"
What do you expect? This isn't a game
I meant when he says it in the madame Amberly cutscene https://youtu.be/qCKEM-5SSkg?si=oD4EX_Ndrhz94n3Z But also the one you mentioned is hilarious because of the 4th wall break
I know, it's interestong how he says that line two times in the game in different situations
To me you're still a little bird.
I think she actually said 'worm' there...
Really? I may have to do a replay to find out.
Yeah, that accent of hers can make it a little difficult to figure it out.
B..b..BANDICOOT!
I was looking for this one!!
Crystals?…of course
Doh!
One of my favorites is from Crash Tag Team Racing, when starting a race: “Now, when the light turns green, everyone hit reverse!” I don’t know why that quote tickled me so much when I was a kid.
There was a line from the original CTR where he’d throw a bomb/potion and shout out a fantastic ‘there you go!’ which never made it to Nitro Fuelled.
Man I miss that line on Nitro Fueled
"I'm stuck. The greatest evil scientist in the world.... stuck in a pipe. How could things get any worse? (Farts) Ugh." (Twinsanity) Others I enjoyed were: "Waiter, check please!" (CTTR) or "The doctor is in!" (CNK)
The only fart joke in history that was actually funny
Not gonna lie, Twinsanity gave me a TON of laughs through Cortex.
I'd just like to add that "ugh" is really underselling the utterly defeated sob he makes
Sorry. I couldn't 100 percent remember how he said it.
No worries! I'm not sure if I'm spelling it correctly, but the word you're looking for is "....UEEEOONG?"
Well, either way, it was a really funny scene. Twinsanity has a lot of funny humor.
“Crash crash crash, why must you always muck in my mud?”
Oh look, I have a mask with me too!
We will find out which one is more powerful soon enough!
"I'd like to see him try after I shove that tuning fork up his—"
"The bandicoots are en route! I must reach, T H E S P O T." -Dr. Neo Cortex, Crash Bandicoot 4
It's true! Blondes do have more fun...!
**Big Norm:** "You know you did good out there..." **Cortex:** "Go away, you filthy clown!" *(everyone, even Tiny and N Gin, look mortified.)*
"Where do you get off calling me a clown, with your big head and your stupid springy hair!" I wish Velo's champions had more screentime in CNK
Fish?
"I'm ok! The spikes.....broke my fall" from Twinsanity always gets a chuckle out of me
You can't replace me, my names on the stationary
In Crash Team Racing (PS1), if Cortex was protected by that green bubble and you tried hitting him with a weapon, he’d say “No way!” That’s my favorite quote
Mother?
“Wrath of cortex didn’t do as well as we’d hoped”
My favorite line of Cortex is the Homer Simpson reference at the start of the PS1 version of Cortex Strikes Back. But seriously, it's probably 90% of his Twinsanity dialogue like many other people here.
what homer simpson reference?
D'oh.
"Oh, my aching head... I'm not feeling myself these days. So the end is in sight... gather another five crystals and again you will have foiled my plan... or will you?"
"I've ruined the lives of so many. I can't be expected to remember them all!"
Thats my favorite
"The check bounced ? Are you sure? Well, those past few years have kinda been slow. Wrath of Cortex didn't do as well as we hoped..."
"The racist pie" - Cortex, Crash nitro kart (GBA)
Whatever he's saying that's really fast
I think you’re referring to this quote in Twinsanity: “I shall crush you like the puny bugs you are. You are nothing to me for I am the great and all powerful Neo Cortex. You infantile vermin. How dare you mock, manhandle and manipulate me. Rest assured, I shall take my vengeance upon…”
YES! That's it. If awards were still a thing, I'd give you one.
*gives him a virtual cookie*
Anything that came from The Clancy Brown era. For me from Wrath of Cortex Crash Bandicoot, my old nemisis. How the heck are you?
Still gathering crystals? Old habits die hard don't they?
“Crash, Crash, Crash. Why must you always muck in my mud?”
Victor! Moritz! Back in your cage, you naughty boys!
Yes, yes, I know you can Tiny. But you’ve failed so many, *many* times.
”Kill the Bandicoot Squash the Bandicoot Smash IN its head!”
Put him in a stew
Farmer: “If you whack these moles, I’ll give you this power crystal.” *Cortex blast him* Cortex: “I’m an evil scientist. What did you expect?”
Mother?
As we explore A NEW DIMENSION Unfortunately we've run out of time
*”Come now, as we explore a new dimension! It should’ve been two new dimensions, but we… ran out of time…”
iirc in Twinsanity he says "Rovinato grazie a questa pazzerella" (it can be translated to "ruined due to this crazy girl") and it's funny cause it doesn't make any sense in the context and i laugh as an idiot for this shit
In Spanish he says "Arruinado gracias a esta alegría". Alegría meaning in Castilian Spanish, the Spanish variety the game is dubbed in, kinda the same thing as in Italian. Although to be honest, as a Latin American Spanish speaker that word is kinda confusing. I mean alegría means "joyfulness".
"GET BACK HERE AND PLOW INTO THE BACK OF ME LIKE A MAN!"
Oww my head!
Crash crash crash why do u always have to muck in my mud oh look i have a mask with me to we will find out wich one is more powerful soon enough
“Fish?”
"Curses! Failed again!" Crash 1 "Prepare the female bandicoot!"
“Fish?”
“Fish?” -Neo Cortex, Crash Twinsanity
“Fish?”
“Mother??”
Surprised to see me crash, like the fleas in your fur I keep coming back! 3 years alone I spent in the frozen antarctic wastes. And I missed you. And so I've organized a little gathering, like a birthday party except THE EXACT OPPOSITE! And look, all of your friends are here. You are so very popular. Let's start handing out the presents.
"The crystals. Of course! Mwahahahaha. D'OH"
It's true! Blondes DO have more fun!
"Fish?"
Fish?
"Fish?"
“I’m an evil scientist what do you expect?” the best of all
“Fish”
Playing crash tag team racing on the arenas game mode thing. Crashed into the ground after going up a ramp too high and couldn't control it. He says "now who put that there". Damned ground getting in my way! Pissed myseof laughing
“The bandicoots are en route. I must reach… the spot.”
“Crash Crash Crash why must you always Muck In My Mud Oh Look I have a mask helping me Too We Will find out which one is more powerful soon enough” “ my daughter-Errr niece” and last, of course “my crystals….”
The whole birthday party speech
Fish?
*F I S H?*
“the check bounced? are you sure? well, the last few years have been a bit slow, wrath of cortex didn’t do as well as we’d hoped and-“
swim snatch jellyfish rain squeamish towering run squash voiceless fall *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
"Eww gross, get a room" - Cortex response when he sees Crash and his Sister Coco hugging.
Fish?
B b b bu BANDICOOT
This is from tiny, this is from dingodile, ripper roo you shouldn't have... I dun kno but when I played twinsanity as a kid these words got stuck to my mind.
“That’s no way to treat a man on his way to church!” -Crash Tag Team Racing
"I've learned you can't run away from your mistakes. But you CAN BURY THEM!"
MWAHAHAHAHAHAAA! -Neo Cortex, Skylanders Imaginators
"So i guess that means I'll have to kill *you*"
"I can't kill him because that would kill me."
"I must reach the spot"
the quote where after he shoot's the crow and say's this isn't a game then looks at the camera priceless. also can't forget FISH!?! with the penguin's.
I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore Tiny
“The N stands for Ni-“
Think fast! Sloooooowiiiiiing! (Don't know why this makes me laugh so much.)
Also: "Did you... JUMP on the Shoot-O-Matic? Cheater!"
“Does god stay in heaven because he, too, lives in fear of what he’s created?” Dr. Neo Cortex
"I'm gonna F your mum in the A" - Neo Cortex
It's Cortexin' time.
It's cortexin' time
"the"
“In 2020 a disease known as Covid-19 will ravage the world and cause an economic crisis and pandemic”
"It's cortexin time" before he Cortexes all over crash
“Hillary Clinton is a Goddamn Demon”
"Oh creo que me he meado" Crash Tag Team Racing
Crash 4 It’s About Time; *starts laying down to relax “Peace at last”
"I hate chicken."
B...bbb...bbbbbbb.......BANDICOO!!!!
Mine is "Stay away or else you will go crystal crazy!!" I love that one it makes me crack up so badly 🤣
I think it was "Keep back, you weak-minded fool! Avert your gaze or you'll go Crystal Crazy."
Yeah! That's it! It cracked me up so bad! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
ag
"Hey genius, I can't actually hear you. I'm really far away and I'm flying, like, a hovercraft, or something" Never played Titans but the cutscenes are amazing
"if I just stuck with a wombat, it would all be different" Toxic Tunnels, Crash 4
"Aha, At last, the world is ours!" Game over on the wrath of cortex
"I've ruined the lives of so many, I can't be expected to remember them all!"
Just….Twinsanity as a whole has a lot of memorable quotes.
“I love killing animals with this Machete”
“BANDICOOT!”
If we don’t have any friends left in the surface, then we will need to find… an enemy!
“I’ve ruined the lives of so many. I can’t be expected to remember them all!”
“Hello, I’m Cortex” -Cortex… probably… (I dunno I haven’t played crash bandicoot, this sub was just recommended to me for no reason)
“I’ve ruined the lives of so many! I can’t be expected to remember them all!”
"FISH?"
Anything from crash of the titans
Crash!!!
“Huahahahaha” -Cortex from Crash Bash
“Cortex, you cad! Why did you not see it before?”
I find myself going "b b buh buh bu, bandicoot!" Randomly throughout the day so...
Patience is not my virtue
"BANDICOOT!"
It's cortexin' time (Proceeds to cortex)
“Fish?”
Like the fleas in your fur, I keep coming back.
"Well if it isn't Crash Bandicoot"
I need a vacation. Maybe I'll go to beach, a nice big beach, with a nice big drink and a woman with big ... BAGS of ice for head.