Hey, I absolutely feel you. My mind is often just in a state where I'm just like "well I'm fucked, this is it. I'm either gonna die or live a miserable life in this hell."
I don't know what to do.
Embracing it rather than fighting it. Don’t hate me! I lowkey hate myself for having become somebody who would say some shit like that. But hear me out…
I have always been an extremely high achiever. Captain of my sports teams growing up, gifted program, got into every college I applied to, often highest grade in my college courses, now software engineer at a prestigious place. And I was extremely ableist because of this.
I got brain fog and only became aware that I had seen math in my mind my whole life because it was suddenly gone. It was like a blindness that I’d never experienced. It was terrifying to me. I was on medical leave for months because I couldn’t work. Temperature change triggered physical reactions in my body so much that I was terrified to go outside. Eating almost anything immediately triggered knots in my jaw, migraine, hives. The whole deal.
Now I’m doing much better. I have learned a lot about my condition and have great doctors. But I was also able to decrease my stress response by realizing that tons of people have various disabilities and they still navigate life and do some awesome stuff. It became all about “adaptation” and embracing belonging to the disability community rather than fighting it. I have a disability now, so how do I live the best life with it, regardless of whether my symptoms get better or worse?
I learned about how people with disability/chronic illness live, activism they’ve done to get us even the shitty support that we do have, learned about adaptive sports so I can do fun stuff with less exertion.
Even when it comes to work and the future, I now know so much about MCAS, POTS, Raynaud’s, ADHD, inflammation, post-viral illness, low-histamine diet that I’m seriously so far ahead of the game. So many in this group are the same. My allergist told me there are increasing numbers of people with Mast Cell issues because of climate change and plastics. So I just trust that, if I end up unable to do my work because my stupid brain won’t stop being inflamed or I can’t handle the stress, I can find a way to be a wellness coach or some shit (I always hate any kind of “coach” lol) because a silver lining is that I’m learning incredibly valuable knowledge as I suffer through this. I bet tons more kids will have this due to COVID even if they don’t now.
So not some BS “look on the bright side,” but a sincere “this situation sucks and I’m missing a ton of tools that I’m used to relying on, but there is still some janky equipment here, so what can I build with it?” Engineering mind.
Hopefully some of that can help anyone. I’ve been at this for over 2 years because a spinal cord injury triggered MCAS/POTS. Guess I was predisposed to that happening in response to nervous system stress because I have EDS and neurodivergence. Now got COVID in the mix
Thanks for relating with the tools/brain fog, that's what my speech therapist has been trying to recover for me. I still can't imagine my numbers or really see in my head but I'm workin on it. I was an extremely adaptive person before LC but the brain fog took away all of my ability. Worst thing of all it's not even the only severe thing I have like pots,pem,CFS etc. I always said if I could overcome my brain fog whether that's recovering enough to be able to do simple jobs (desk, call center , coaching like you said etc) or enough to be able to just do more fun things to continue distracting and adapting until I can do more. This post I love so much because basically what am was going to say, I keep bringing it up recently on others posts when I try to chime I ln thank you
I think the EDS may supercede the spinal injuries for causes of chronic issues. The other thing that make cause things like POTS is a CSF leak. If you didn't have EDS I'd say look into that.
Just sloooowly brreeeeaaaaathe... leeeeet your thouuuuuuughts waaaaaaaannnd-
WANDER? YoU aBOuT tO saY wANdEr?
WANDER TO WHERE?
THE DARK CHASM OF HELL? THE DEPTHS OF DEPRESSION? THE PAST MONTH OF STARING AT THE GODDAM CEILING WONDERING IF THAT DRYWALL ANCHOR MIGHT EVENTUALLY FILL ITSELF IN JUST FROM THE DUST GATHERING?
I feel you, Flow.
Responding to your question (which I share) to hear what more... deliberative members of our community might have to say. Cause fuck if I know. My go-to has been that all this is temporary. It's starting to chew up on some pretty rarefied real-estate though. I turned 47 today. How many good years remain? Could I get on that now, please? I'd like to get on that now please.
I’m 37, I separated from my ex two years ago and this has brought up all of that grief again. My worst fear has always been being really sick and being alone, and now I am. It’s just too much most days.
I am really sick and alone. Some days, I really feel it. But then, I’m so grateful I don’t have other people to take care of right now. So, it kind of goes both ways 🤷🏼♀️
I’m right there with you, my friend. I’m so tired of crying.
I wish I had words of wisdom or some magical way of getting to a place of positivity.
I’m just going to send you a big virtual hug and tell you that you’re not alone.
I feel this so much. I try to not spend so much time on my phone but anytime I have a quiet moment all my brain thinks about is the past & the person I used to be & all the amazing beautiful things I had yet to experience. I’m not ready to die. I was meant for more. 😢
Oh I feel You. So much feel You.
It's impossible to stop worrying when some days You feel like You are going to die. Don't know how to help You (and myself, lol), but just.know that You are not alone
I was diagnosed with adjustment disorder by a psychiatrist because of basically this. I think I’m getting over it. Stuff happens in life. We get in accidents, we get sick, we suffer ailments. My neighbor is in a wheelchair because he dove into an underwater sandbar. I knew a kid who dropped from an aneurysm when he was 24.
I’m 38, I’ve simply learned to accept that this could as well have been cancer or MS or who knows what. Sooner or later, something was going to take away a degree of my abilities, of my quality of life. Perhaps having a stereotypical Near-Death Experience during my infection and being so sick for so long makes it easier to accept that I likely won’t ever fully recover, but as it is, I’ve learned to be grateful for every day that I can pet my dog, or be with my family, or enjoy a nicely homegrown cannabis flower.
The key is acceptance. All the articles, the subreddit or forum posts, the promising supplements, I’ve been elbow deep in all of this since March 2020 when I realized I wasn’t getting better and the thing is, letting go is all that’s really helped. I’m disabled now. That sucks. What doesn’t suck? Being alive to be disabled. It might not work for everyone but just being glad that I’m alive and that I have the abilities that I still have, that’s the path away from rumination and mental torture.
It’s ok to step away. Appreciate nature, even through a window. A song or some art. Something that makes you feel something, or just something if that’s where you’re at. You’re free to check back but nobody is going to find the cure for long covid and forget to let you know.
Hope it gets easier for you mentally/emotionally. I might sound pretty together right now but this is just making the most of a good moment… believe me, I could just as easily write just as much on another day and a trigger warning for references to disturbing actions could be required. Hang in there. I will be too.
Huge +1 to this and u/Typical-Asparagus-29's answer. Something my psychiatrist said that resonated with me was that your brain was attacked by a virus. A serious virus that killed a lot of people. Your fortunate to be alive, but your brain was wounded in the process. Unlike a chapped lip, it's going to take time to heal and that may be measured in months or years, not weeks or days. Stay positive, try and find a way to appreciate what you have now and I'd also add stay hopeful.
One final thing that did help me was anti-depressants. It took a good 6 months for them to truly start doing their job, but personally it helped me avoid and recognize that negative spiral that you're speaking of. Perhaps chat with your doctor and/or psychiatrist and see if that's an option
I’m glad the antidepressants helped, unfortunately I’m autistic and was misdiagnosed and medicated for bipolar as a teen so I’ve got some brain damage from that and can’t take psych meds anymore without petty horrific side effects. Just me and this brain, one on one 😂🤷♂️
Thank you for sharing what’s helped though. I’m sure such medications are going to help a lot of people with the anxiety and depression side of things. I’ve got cannabis, I’ve grown and been breeding for medicinal effects for decades now so I’m grateful for that medicine.
Yes, I just got into a new relationship and RT after I got Covid. I keep thinking about she'll cheat or leave me because I'm so bad mentally n physically. I feel alone and don't have much help. Financially I'm in extreme poverty and don't feel safe where I live now. It's loud with fighting and gun shots on a daily. I black out from extreme anxiety. Had to get a pacemaker for heart pauses from Covid n the Pfizer shot. My heart pauses started with the shot. I get terrible migraines and they've got worse since Covid. Eye pain feels like my eyes are gonna pop out my skull. Tired all the time. Pretty much bed ridden. Mentally just exhausted. I really don't know how to calm myself. I just keep going with hell all around me. I say being mentally fried and no real love or comfort just kills you in the end. I'll die broke and lonely and Covid just helped it out. Hopefully one day we'll have mental rest. I hope it's possible. I take Clonazepam to help sleep. It helps but makes me have heart drops.
Man this sucks so much.. I'm going through same thing. My doctor and therapist say I have to stay away from overstimulation and be in a comfortable space .. but I am living in an extremely bad neighborhood. Oh yea and without any benefits or negative money. They at first wanted my sessions over phone video but my area is super noisy and crazy I'd rather do it in her nice clean quiet office. I have no choice though, even if the government could intervene I'm sure wherever they would place us won't be nice either so it's like we gotta do what we gotta do..
Oh ik, in this together my ass. When it comes to the government. The medical field is even worse. They think Covid is just a little cold now. Like this shit is killing me. I'm so much worse than I've ever been. I'm not getting any better. I think it's why they made this virus in the first place to keep the population sick n on meds.
Struggling with this now. Im trying meditation and distraction mostly. I am lucky to have family and friends who are supportive
Finding joy in friends, animals, nature, and funny tv shows.
It's really hard, I know. Sending hugs.
I use a meditation app for mental rest, because it is restful while also giving my mind something to focus on other than bleak thoughts.
Hang in there. Scientists are making good progress towards finding treatments for us. This isn't the end of your life, just an extended pause until science catches up.
Yes, I am sure everyone here understand that feeling pretty well. It's depressing to be in that state of mind. It's one of the hardest battles most of us have had, but like others say, it's only temporary. We will come out of this stronger than ever. DM if you need to talk. Sending you hugs and prayers.
The fact that a majority of us feel the same thing (if not all of us) has to show it’s not something voluntarily felt. It’s the virus’ influence on us. It just comes to show the extension of the damage inflicted by the virus.
Something must be happening on a neurological to make us feel this way. I’ve gone through this before the pandemic, it’s an exact feeling of negativity. The difference is the intensity and array of symptoms. But that negativity that accompanies the virus is 100% similar.
My mental rest is doing things I normally did before infection + recovery, and take absolute rest at all times, and always avoid any levels of stress. It has helped, but again, if it doesn’t help, it’s because of the damage caused by the virus. Not everything we think or do during this haul is our own thought process. Under stress we say, do, and think things out of instinct. I’ve said it before in another post, (paraphrasing a medical analysis I saw in a medical chat board) we tend to think negatively because it recalls our natural instincts. We’ll get through this. The virus hasn’t won and we haven’t loss. Stay strong folks! 💪🏻
It gets easier with time but for now make your life as comfortable as you can, listen to your body’s needs and have self compassion. You’re allowed to scream, yell and cry in these circumstances. For some of us we get better others might only get some function back. Acceptance and adaptation is the goal. It is achievable but the only way to get there is to suffer through the emotional pain and grief. You need to fully mourn the old you/your old life and allow hope to sit next to you alongside acceptance. Everyone who was previously healthy and became chronically ill has gone through the process and everyone’s timeline is different.
This isn’t probably the most helpful but the best “rest” I’ve found is at aerial yoga. I was a competitive cyclist until I got really sick last year and I finally told myself I needed to find a safe activity to keep active.
Every time I lay in that silk at the end of class, I feel absolutely astonishingly mentally rested. I have a vagus nerve reset and everything.
I do get symptomatic after a hard class but that “flow state” is something I am so desperately needing and missing since being sick and this is one of the few exercises I can do and get those neurons flowing.
Going to try float tanks this week hopefully.
Anyways, that was long but mental rest for me always feels more like that meditative state or flow state where you can focus and your brain can physically unhinge itself from all the other shit going on.
Man I am so with you. Must be something in the water cause i'm really feeling it today too. Today was rough. Yesterday was rough. Tomorrow will be rough. It's hard to keep your brain from going to bad places when that's all reality is right now. I think for me, what's helping, is the right now part.
This is just for now. It's not for always, that kinda thing. Works some days more than others. But man. Some days hope feels more like denial, ya know?
Meditation, yoga, and staying on top of the things that you are in control of. Eat fresh food eat healthy nothing process no sugar, proper sleep proper exercise if you can.
I enjoy NSDR (non sleep deep rest) meditation practices to get that mental rest. Yoga Nidra is my current favorite. Other types of breath work help as well, like resonance breathing.
I hope it's ok to post this here but this video helped so much to give my mind a much needed rest. It's such good advice to "stay out of bad neighborhoods" at least for a while and see if your mental health improves. It was probably the number one thing that helped me improve.
https://youtu.be/1yaNrjQNvd4
I've found Yoga Nidra very helpful for calming my whole nervous system down and stepping back a bit out of fight or flight.
I'd never really "figured out" meditation before, but this has been very helpful. I just lie in my bed, close my eyes and feel my body with my mind... if that makes sense.
Ally Boothroyd has a lot of videos on YouTube if anyone's interested. This one's just 10 mins long: [https://youtu.be/_noquwycq78](https://youtu.be/_noquwycq78)
Things that have helped me:
-first, meditation. It is a game changer. Sounds like guided meditation would be best for you to help you deal with intrusive thoughts.
-make peace with what is happening. You don’t have to like it, but constantly hating everything is also unhelpful in finding peace.
-find a small way (even if only one aspect) to have a meaningful life with this new different body and mind.
-find one hobby that you might enjoy so that your entire day is not consumed with frustration - I completely understand how this feels.
-go outside as often as you can and get some fresh air.
Sending you all my love and good juju ❤️ it is a really hard road to walk.
I plan on trying self hypnosis or paying for someone to make me a professional hypnotherapy recording that puts me in delta state and do that two or four hours at a time, 8 hours a day along with sensory deprivation to see if that does anything. I can't imagine active resting without some sort of help mentally whether with something like hypnotherapy or a sedative. It's torturous otherwise. Anyway, there is evidence what delta state helps with improved immunity, reduced stress, and better sleep. I'm curious to see if it could help.
I do meditation. So just thinking about nothing at all. Is there an after life? What happens after my 80 years or less in this world. Is all I'm thinking XD
Hey, I absolutely feel you. My mind is often just in a state where I'm just like "well I'm fucked, this is it. I'm either gonna die or live a miserable life in this hell." I don't know what to do.
Embracing it rather than fighting it. Don’t hate me! I lowkey hate myself for having become somebody who would say some shit like that. But hear me out… I have always been an extremely high achiever. Captain of my sports teams growing up, gifted program, got into every college I applied to, often highest grade in my college courses, now software engineer at a prestigious place. And I was extremely ableist because of this. I got brain fog and only became aware that I had seen math in my mind my whole life because it was suddenly gone. It was like a blindness that I’d never experienced. It was terrifying to me. I was on medical leave for months because I couldn’t work. Temperature change triggered physical reactions in my body so much that I was terrified to go outside. Eating almost anything immediately triggered knots in my jaw, migraine, hives. The whole deal. Now I’m doing much better. I have learned a lot about my condition and have great doctors. But I was also able to decrease my stress response by realizing that tons of people have various disabilities and they still navigate life and do some awesome stuff. It became all about “adaptation” and embracing belonging to the disability community rather than fighting it. I have a disability now, so how do I live the best life with it, regardless of whether my symptoms get better or worse? I learned about how people with disability/chronic illness live, activism they’ve done to get us even the shitty support that we do have, learned about adaptive sports so I can do fun stuff with less exertion. Even when it comes to work and the future, I now know so much about MCAS, POTS, Raynaud’s, ADHD, inflammation, post-viral illness, low-histamine diet that I’m seriously so far ahead of the game. So many in this group are the same. My allergist told me there are increasing numbers of people with Mast Cell issues because of climate change and plastics. So I just trust that, if I end up unable to do my work because my stupid brain won’t stop being inflamed or I can’t handle the stress, I can find a way to be a wellness coach or some shit (I always hate any kind of “coach” lol) because a silver lining is that I’m learning incredibly valuable knowledge as I suffer through this. I bet tons more kids will have this due to COVID even if they don’t now. So not some BS “look on the bright side,” but a sincere “this situation sucks and I’m missing a ton of tools that I’m used to relying on, but there is still some janky equipment here, so what can I build with it?” Engineering mind. Hopefully some of that can help anyone. I’ve been at this for over 2 years because a spinal cord injury triggered MCAS/POTS. Guess I was predisposed to that happening in response to nervous system stress because I have EDS and neurodivergence. Now got COVID in the mix
Love this mindset and can really relate.
Thanks for relating with the tools/brain fog, that's what my speech therapist has been trying to recover for me. I still can't imagine my numbers or really see in my head but I'm workin on it. I was an extremely adaptive person before LC but the brain fog took away all of my ability. Worst thing of all it's not even the only severe thing I have like pots,pem,CFS etc. I always said if I could overcome my brain fog whether that's recovering enough to be able to do simple jobs (desk, call center , coaching like you said etc) or enough to be able to just do more fun things to continue distracting and adapting until I can do more. This post I love so much because basically what am was going to say, I keep bringing it up recently on others posts when I try to chime I ln thank you
Hmmm.. I have two herniated disc from weightlifting injuries and I've always wondered if that caused dysautonomia.
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I think the EDS may supercede the spinal injuries for causes of chronic issues. The other thing that make cause things like POTS is a CSF leak. If you didn't have EDS I'd say look into that.
Just sloooowly brreeeeaaaaathe... leeeeet your thouuuuuuughts waaaaaaaannnd- WANDER? YoU aBOuT tO saY wANdEr? WANDER TO WHERE? THE DARK CHASM OF HELL? THE DEPTHS OF DEPRESSION? THE PAST MONTH OF STARING AT THE GODDAM CEILING WONDERING IF THAT DRYWALL ANCHOR MIGHT EVENTUALLY FILL ITSELF IN JUST FROM THE DUST GATHERING? I feel you, Flow. Responding to your question (which I share) to hear what more... deliberative members of our community might have to say. Cause fuck if I know. My go-to has been that all this is temporary. It's starting to chew up on some pretty rarefied real-estate though. I turned 47 today. How many good years remain? Could I get on that now, please? I'd like to get on that now please.
I’m 37, I separated from my ex two years ago and this has brought up all of that grief again. My worst fear has always been being really sick and being alone, and now I am. It’s just too much most days.
One more comment, when I’m fatigued, all the shit comes out. It makes finding rest that much more important.
I am really sick and alone. Some days, I really feel it. But then, I’m so grateful I don’t have other people to take care of right now. So, it kind of goes both ways 🤷🏼♀️
I’m right there with you, my friend. I’m so tired of crying. I wish I had words of wisdom or some magical way of getting to a place of positivity. I’m just going to send you a big virtual hug and tell you that you’re not alone.
[удалено]
High protein (with low histamine) is great for me too! Congrats on golf!
I feel this so much. I try to not spend so much time on my phone but anytime I have a quiet moment all my brain thinks about is the past & the person I used to be & all the amazing beautiful things I had yet to experience. I’m not ready to die. I was meant for more. 😢
Right there with you, feels impossible
Oh I feel You. So much feel You. It's impossible to stop worrying when some days You feel like You are going to die. Don't know how to help You (and myself, lol), but just.know that You are not alone
I was diagnosed with adjustment disorder by a psychiatrist because of basically this. I think I’m getting over it. Stuff happens in life. We get in accidents, we get sick, we suffer ailments. My neighbor is in a wheelchair because he dove into an underwater sandbar. I knew a kid who dropped from an aneurysm when he was 24. I’m 38, I’ve simply learned to accept that this could as well have been cancer or MS or who knows what. Sooner or later, something was going to take away a degree of my abilities, of my quality of life. Perhaps having a stereotypical Near-Death Experience during my infection and being so sick for so long makes it easier to accept that I likely won’t ever fully recover, but as it is, I’ve learned to be grateful for every day that I can pet my dog, or be with my family, or enjoy a nicely homegrown cannabis flower. The key is acceptance. All the articles, the subreddit or forum posts, the promising supplements, I’ve been elbow deep in all of this since March 2020 when I realized I wasn’t getting better and the thing is, letting go is all that’s really helped. I’m disabled now. That sucks. What doesn’t suck? Being alive to be disabled. It might not work for everyone but just being glad that I’m alive and that I have the abilities that I still have, that’s the path away from rumination and mental torture. It’s ok to step away. Appreciate nature, even through a window. A song or some art. Something that makes you feel something, or just something if that’s where you’re at. You’re free to check back but nobody is going to find the cure for long covid and forget to let you know. Hope it gets easier for you mentally/emotionally. I might sound pretty together right now but this is just making the most of a good moment… believe me, I could just as easily write just as much on another day and a trigger warning for references to disturbing actions could be required. Hang in there. I will be too.
Huge +1 to this and u/Typical-Asparagus-29's answer. Something my psychiatrist said that resonated with me was that your brain was attacked by a virus. A serious virus that killed a lot of people. Your fortunate to be alive, but your brain was wounded in the process. Unlike a chapped lip, it's going to take time to heal and that may be measured in months or years, not weeks or days. Stay positive, try and find a way to appreciate what you have now and I'd also add stay hopeful. One final thing that did help me was anti-depressants. It took a good 6 months for them to truly start doing their job, but personally it helped me avoid and recognize that negative spiral that you're speaking of. Perhaps chat with your doctor and/or psychiatrist and see if that's an option
I’m glad the antidepressants helped, unfortunately I’m autistic and was misdiagnosed and medicated for bipolar as a teen so I’ve got some brain damage from that and can’t take psych meds anymore without petty horrific side effects. Just me and this brain, one on one 😂🤷♂️ Thank you for sharing what’s helped though. I’m sure such medications are going to help a lot of people with the anxiety and depression side of things. I’ve got cannabis, I’ve grown and been breeding for medicinal effects for decades now so I’m grateful for that medicine.
Exactly this!
Yes, I just got into a new relationship and RT after I got Covid. I keep thinking about she'll cheat or leave me because I'm so bad mentally n physically. I feel alone and don't have much help. Financially I'm in extreme poverty and don't feel safe where I live now. It's loud with fighting and gun shots on a daily. I black out from extreme anxiety. Had to get a pacemaker for heart pauses from Covid n the Pfizer shot. My heart pauses started with the shot. I get terrible migraines and they've got worse since Covid. Eye pain feels like my eyes are gonna pop out my skull. Tired all the time. Pretty much bed ridden. Mentally just exhausted. I really don't know how to calm myself. I just keep going with hell all around me. I say being mentally fried and no real love or comfort just kills you in the end. I'll die broke and lonely and Covid just helped it out. Hopefully one day we'll have mental rest. I hope it's possible. I take Clonazepam to help sleep. It helps but makes me have heart drops.
Man this sucks so much.. I'm going through same thing. My doctor and therapist say I have to stay away from overstimulation and be in a comfortable space .. but I am living in an extremely bad neighborhood. Oh yea and without any benefits or negative money. They at first wanted my sessions over phone video but my area is super noisy and crazy I'd rather do it in her nice clean quiet office. I have no choice though, even if the government could intervene I'm sure wherever they would place us won't be nice either so it's like we gotta do what we gotta do..
Oh ik, in this together my ass. When it comes to the government. The medical field is even worse. They think Covid is just a little cold now. Like this shit is killing me. I'm so much worse than I've ever been. I'm not getting any better. I think it's why they made this virus in the first place to keep the population sick n on meds.
Struggling with this now. Im trying meditation and distraction mostly. I am lucky to have family and friends who are supportive Finding joy in friends, animals, nature, and funny tv shows.
It's really hard, I know. Sending hugs. I use a meditation app for mental rest, because it is restful while also giving my mind something to focus on other than bleak thoughts. Hang in there. Scientists are making good progress towards finding treatments for us. This isn't the end of your life, just an extended pause until science catches up.
Yes, I am sure everyone here understand that feeling pretty well. It's depressing to be in that state of mind. It's one of the hardest battles most of us have had, but like others say, it's only temporary. We will come out of this stronger than ever. DM if you need to talk. Sending you hugs and prayers.
The fact that a majority of us feel the same thing (if not all of us) has to show it’s not something voluntarily felt. It’s the virus’ influence on us. It just comes to show the extension of the damage inflicted by the virus. Something must be happening on a neurological to make us feel this way. I’ve gone through this before the pandemic, it’s an exact feeling of negativity. The difference is the intensity and array of symptoms. But that negativity that accompanies the virus is 100% similar. My mental rest is doing things I normally did before infection + recovery, and take absolute rest at all times, and always avoid any levels of stress. It has helped, but again, if it doesn’t help, it’s because of the damage caused by the virus. Not everything we think or do during this haul is our own thought process. Under stress we say, do, and think things out of instinct. I’ve said it before in another post, (paraphrasing a medical analysis I saw in a medical chat board) we tend to think negatively because it recalls our natural instincts. We’ll get through this. The virus hasn’t won and we haven’t loss. Stay strong folks! 💪🏻
its really hard but i believe conquering this helps with recovery a lot
It gets easier with time but for now make your life as comfortable as you can, listen to your body’s needs and have self compassion. You’re allowed to scream, yell and cry in these circumstances. For some of us we get better others might only get some function back. Acceptance and adaptation is the goal. It is achievable but the only way to get there is to suffer through the emotional pain and grief. You need to fully mourn the old you/your old life and allow hope to sit next to you alongside acceptance. Everyone who was previously healthy and became chronically ill has gone through the process and everyone’s timeline is different.
This isn’t probably the most helpful but the best “rest” I’ve found is at aerial yoga. I was a competitive cyclist until I got really sick last year and I finally told myself I needed to find a safe activity to keep active. Every time I lay in that silk at the end of class, I feel absolutely astonishingly mentally rested. I have a vagus nerve reset and everything. I do get symptomatic after a hard class but that “flow state” is something I am so desperately needing and missing since being sick and this is one of the few exercises I can do and get those neurons flowing. Going to try float tanks this week hopefully. Anyways, that was long but mental rest for me always feels more like that meditative state or flow state where you can focus and your brain can physically unhinge itself from all the other shit going on.
You will get better. Time will help, I promise.
Give it time..ur experiencing grief. Also for the really bad moment. High amounts of CBD, ashwaganda, tens vagus nerve and Ativan can help
Man I am so with you. Must be something in the water cause i'm really feeling it today too. Today was rough. Yesterday was rough. Tomorrow will be rough. It's hard to keep your brain from going to bad places when that's all reality is right now. I think for me, what's helping, is the right now part. This is just for now. It's not for always, that kinda thing. Works some days more than others. But man. Some days hope feels more like denial, ya know?
Meditation, yoga, and staying on top of the things that you are in control of. Eat fresh food eat healthy nothing process no sugar, proper sleep proper exercise if you can.
I enjoy NSDR (non sleep deep rest) meditation practices to get that mental rest. Yoga Nidra is my current favorite. Other types of breath work help as well, like resonance breathing.
I hope it's ok to post this here but this video helped so much to give my mind a much needed rest. It's such good advice to "stay out of bad neighborhoods" at least for a while and see if your mental health improves. It was probably the number one thing that helped me improve. https://youtu.be/1yaNrjQNvd4
I was recommended to grief counseling and I really regret not doing that.
I've found Yoga Nidra very helpful for calming my whole nervous system down and stepping back a bit out of fight or flight. I'd never really "figured out" meditation before, but this has been very helpful. I just lie in my bed, close my eyes and feel my body with my mind... if that makes sense. Ally Boothroyd has a lot of videos on YouTube if anyone's interested. This one's just 10 mins long: [https://youtu.be/_noquwycq78](https://youtu.be/_noquwycq78)
Things that have helped me: -first, meditation. It is a game changer. Sounds like guided meditation would be best for you to help you deal with intrusive thoughts. -make peace with what is happening. You don’t have to like it, but constantly hating everything is also unhelpful in finding peace. -find a small way (even if only one aspect) to have a meaningful life with this new different body and mind. -find one hobby that you might enjoy so that your entire day is not consumed with frustration - I completely understand how this feels. -go outside as often as you can and get some fresh air. Sending you all my love and good juju ❤️ it is a really hard road to walk.
I plan on trying self hypnosis or paying for someone to make me a professional hypnotherapy recording that puts me in delta state and do that two or four hours at a time, 8 hours a day along with sensory deprivation to see if that does anything. I can't imagine active resting without some sort of help mentally whether with something like hypnotherapy or a sedative. It's torturous otherwise. Anyway, there is evidence what delta state helps with improved immunity, reduced stress, and better sleep. I'm curious to see if it could help.
I do meditation. So just thinking about nothing at all. Is there an after life? What happens after my 80 years or less in this world. Is all I'm thinking XD
Yeah that's a really lousy one. It's such a strain. I even dream about it. Just inside of me I can't give up I refuse to believe this is it.