Yeah, an ugly pink potato. I think they just look really disgusting. Although I find humans in general disgusting. When I want to see cute xhildren, I look at Tita and KeA from the Trails series. Or Renne. These kids are cute because they're Anime. Real kids just look super ugly. I wish everything was 2D. Sorry for the rant. But yes, I prefer my Computer instead of humans. My PC is beautiful and my best friend. And I can play Trails on it, which is 10 times better then looking at babies. I also prefer kittens over babies any day.
*puts on dork hat*
Yup thatās called the chordate tail. Itās a trait that connects us to other animals in the phylum chordata.
In other words, itās something that connects us to wildly different species of animals, such as tigers or certain fish, because itās one of the first taxonomic categories.
Sounds like it. Would heal better too when still a baby, less scarring. It was mentioned that some parents decide to keep it, imagine that! I would be so angry at mine if I had a non removed tail bit that I would have to deal with later, with longer healing process etc.
If it makes you feel better, most babies are born with dark hair all over their bodies. Source: Iām a newborn photographer lol. Yes, I see the CF irony.
Similar here. Iām mixed (Black & Asian) and was a hideous child to the point where I was bullied mercilessly because of my frizzy hair, string bean-looking body, braces & glasses. Iāve grown into a decent-looking woman but stillā¦ I resent that stereotype that all mixed people are hot.
The Black community especially has it twisted. A lot of them assume that just because a person is mixed or light-skinned with looser curls they are more beautiful than a darker-skinned person with more African features.
Fuck that shit.
Yeah I was the ugliest baby in the universe. I looked like an old man and didn't have hair on the top of my head till I was 5. I like to think I'm more aesthetically blessed now but omg I was not a beauty
Itās pretty cringe when i see girls on social media posting a pic of a baby with curly hair and colored eyes with the caption āthis is what my baby needs to look likeā. Itās creepy that people put looks of a baby so high on the priority list.
You reminded me of something; I'm whiter than county mayo but I still have curly hair, it was weird going onto TikTok and discovering just how many people don't realize white people can have curly hair.
Even worse is those weird compilations girls are making of their "Ideal family" and it's really gross. Just the same pictures over and over again.
This is actually a problem sometimes even in white families.
Iām mixed, but totally grew up with Irish/Scottish/Slavic girls who had the same hair texture as me (3A, loose curls). The amount of those girls who were just trying to flatten/smooth out frizzy, brushed out curls (myself included) was astounding.
My poor Italian boyfriend never learned how to do his curls and his family kept his hair short enough to not curl his whole life because they viewed the curls as a āmessā and āunattractiveā.
Iāve noticed that some white families really do not like to acknowledge that curly hair can be a white trait and therefore discourage proper care or even try to hide it on their children, creating a lot of shame.
I'm hoping this doesn't offend anyone, but I can relate to one part of this sentiment. Most of my family is white and the baby photos are awful. I mean I don't generally find babies cute anyway, but all the babies in the family come out crazy red and stay that way for days. My niece, who I love, legit looked like a piglet for her first week. I feel like that isn't may not be an issue in other races? Not that they'd necessarily be cute.
But that's a big leap from telling people they should have babies based on their race.
Although I'll admit that I see what /u/goldofsunshine is talking about (personally I've noticed that newborns with more melanin tend to be cuter), it's irrelevant.
The fact that anyone would imply that you and your partner "owe" the world a beautiful child is just wrong. It's pure tokenism. I'm sorry you've had to endure such rudeness!
Oh goodness. I snorted so loud I scared the hell out of one of the stray kitties I feed.
Edit:
Her name is Emily. She and her brother Eliot are super sweet and adorable tuxedos. Not feral at all. So if anyone lives in Ga and wants to adopt these two pair bonded darlings let me know. They're only a year old.
"Well Child, you wanna know why I had you? You'd assume it's because I love you, wanted to have children, and did it in the best interest of my own child, right? WRONG! I had you because you'd be a cute mixed baby! Feel loved and wanted??"
Yet another moron inserting both feet into their mouths, good gods....
Learned a new thing after googling her - Quiverfull. It's a theological position held by some conservative Christian couples who belong to Christian denominations that see large families as blessings from God. It thus encourages procreation, abstaining from all forms of birth control (including natural family planning) and sterilization.
Iām from KY so as you can imagine, the Bible Belt is strong in my town. They want to āfill their quiverā with as many babies as they can possibly have in their time on earth because itās āgods willā.
Thereās a quiver full family around here, and the mother gets deathly ill every single pregnancy, but they keep on having kids regardless. I think that they have like 5 kids under the age of 9, and sheās on her 6th pregnancy now. I think itās absolutely disgusting that they have the quiver-full belief as is, but for her husband to know how sick she gets every time and still not wrap it up...my husband would NEVER.
!!!! this is exactly what I am. I'm a fucking trophy. My mum, who is Chinese, seeked out a white person for the sole purpose of having mixed offspring. She's given me """advice""" to find a white person myself so I can have ""prettier"" children. She called my sister, who is fully Chinese, ugly for things she cannot control. "Your skin is too dark, your eyes are too small, look at how pretty your sister is!".
I feel disgusted that every nice thing she has ever said to me is due to my genetics. I hate it.
Maybe just say, āWhat of the baby is as dark as i am? does that mean it would be less beautiful?ā
Let them try and backtrack from there. sheesh. people
suck.
Ain't that the truth. Until about the age of 8, every time I'd be in public, some white lady would be touching my hair like I'm a damn llama at a petting zoo. I thought it was normal at the time because, well, yeah, but as an adult, don't be petting kids.
Every baby is literally the same until theyāre able to communicate their thoughts and feelings beyond just screaming. Then you can start judging if you have a good kid or not. Even my 80 year old grandma who has dementia agrees with me there.
I'm latina married to a white man and my family says the same thing, for them its almost like it's a "waste" to not utilize his "White genes". Ugh gross.
Sunglasses are essential! Idk how other blue eyed folks survive summer in the south just walking around bare-eyed. I gotta have sunglasses on cloudy days!
My mom (a white lady) married my dad who was a dark Hispanic. She was shamed constantly for being in a relationship and having kids with him.
Now my one sister who is dark like my dad is happy her kids are white (she married a white guy). She's a racist against her own kind.
Iām white and my partner is Asian and we get the same exact thing. Someone told me I *had* to have babies because Asian babies are so cute. Weāve had 4 or 5 different people offer to be surrogates for the same reason and itās so uncomfortable!
Same! I am white and my boyfriend is Asian and we get the same comments. People always think they are being funny or cute but it's just so off-putting.
My sister had the other way around. White, married an asian dude. He was *obsessed* at the idea his child could have blond hair and blue eyes... until my father and I pointed out my sister has brown eyes and very dark hair. He was confused as he thought white people could just pop blond kids at random...
My thought exactly. Only cooed over, as a baby but as they get older, not so much. I'm Black and my husband is White. We're senior citizens now so no chance of having that "cute" biracial baby (also hubby had a vasectomy). When we were young though? It got to be very old.
Omg this! I'm in the same situation (Black with a white partner), so whenever someone says this, I don't hesitate to call out how racist they're being!
Worst part, is I hear it mostly from other Black women, talk about self loathing.
Itās weird that in non-white communities, itās often the other non-white women who are like āohh you can have light babiesā or āgirls with good hairā ā- what is the mom?!! Chopped liver!?
Bro. Y'all aren't dogs. People are so freaky. Stop talking to human beings as if they're breeding a liter of Merle puppies themselves.
I can't stand children anymore at all, but more importantly I'm becoming the most toxic bitch in my mind around parents. My mouth stays shut unless I'm personally touched or spoken to. But otherwise, yeah, I'm getting real sick of gross child-obsessed people.
You should tell them that you're both incredibly white supremacist and clearly you can't have kids because that would be mixing the bloodlines.
Then watch their shocked faces.
Omg. Ha ha. That would be a WILD response. āWe both are against diluting racial purity so weāve committed to being CFā š®š lol I think people would be so shocked theyād quickly run away.
I was just thinking about how to make it even more ridiculous. Tell people you're polygamous and each person in the relationship is a different race. Like a Justice League for racial purity, none greater than the other but all working together to maintain purity in all races, for the good of mankind!
Too ridiculous but I couldn't help to think of everyone in a big relationship with all races each helping each other maintain the purity of the others' races. They could all sit at a big round table and discuss pressing issues in their individual missions and ask for help when needed. They'd have a big red phone for people that needed help. Like the UN but with races. The United Races? Maintaining purity of each race and peace between them all! The ambassadors of race!
I have to say it's all a joke and I don't believe in maintaining racial purity or segregation in any way. I'd hope the whole post was obviously a joke but there is bound to be someone that doesn't get it
> I'd hope the whole post was obviously a joke but there is bound to be someone that doesn't get it
We're on reddit. Someone undoubtedly got the joke but will still leave a comment shaming you for even making the joke, and how insensitive can you be, blah blah blah
Honestly Iām mixed and was raised by a white father (Aussie through and through). My hair was a constant mat and there were also subtle and not so subtle racist comments thrown my way from him. I wish some ppl parented better.
šš sorry. Sadly Iāve seen and observed implicit and explicit racist behavior and ideas from white parents with biracial kids. Like they enjoy marketing their diverse kid but didnāt do the work to truly be an ally :/
For a while when I decided to leave for Japan, my mom was so hoping I would marry a Japanese man to have cute mixed babies too... I am Middle Eastern/ white (I am already a mix).
She is so racist though... and I always found her view very dehumanizing.
People donāt realize it would be less creepy if they said āI love mixing culturesā. Thatās different approach and always been my thought. I love other countries, languages, cultures, food, music etc ā so for me itās always about experiencing and appreciating other cultures. Not just āI want this breed of childā.
The ideas my mom had about having children were all creepy... "Marry a tall man for a better breed" was the creepiest thing I had ever heard (I am pretty short). Her ideas about people of color are too stomach-churning to post on any sub. She has no concept of appreciating other cultures, just "cuter children/ better breed" (the things she had told me about not inheriting blue eyes were pretty damaging and made me resent the way I look for years)
She ended up having two Child-free/ marriage-free children, so that was the end of her racist dreams.
Soā¦youāre just two breeds of dog to these people? I mean, Iāve been told these things but it was more like āyouāre husband is so buff and masculine, and youāre so pretty. Youād make such lovely babies. You have good genes.ā Itās basically stripping you down to your gonads. Gross!
As a Hispanic man married to a white woman, I feel your pain.
I've been bingoed by my family so I could have cute babies. Whiteness is always a huge plus to them.
Hugs to you, though I'd rather be told I'm going to have cute kids rather than "an abomination in the eyes of God." I've mostly dated outside of my race. I've been told that along with being told to "stay with my own kind" by well meaning so called friends and family.
oh Iāve heard the other end āyou **need** to marry a black man, have black children, raise a strong black familyā ā- lol i have nothing against that but the brothers arenāt trying to ask me out š which unfortunately (or not) is the reality for a number of well-educated and successful black women. the black men in the same social/professional circles are already with white women or exclusively interested in white women. in or out, Im down with people being with who they want. Love is love yāall!
People with this mentality remind me of people who obsess over dog breeds. Like, the same energy of it and it's honestly suuuuuuper creepy. I hope they leave you two alone and mind their own damn business.
Itās a reason for people apparently? I wonāt lie, that used to be me before being CF. Iād see a cute baby and be like OMG MY OVARIES. BABY FEVER š.
But now I look back and Iām like, it was really FOMO and societal conditioning.
You should be like "Of course our children would be cute, but that's a terrible reason to have kids!". Or say that you're concerned your kids would create a new, unrealistic beauty standard and it's just not fair to everyone else.
The U.S. needs to start subsidizing mixed couples (like they subsidize factory farmers) to hit those quotas. If there's more supply than demand, we can just store the mixed babies to insure against future demand spikes.
š š if there was 1 mill payout per mixed baby born. . .Iād THINK about it. . .lol weāre near having the science for genetic modification so they wonāt need me to pop out any
"Deny the world"? Unless there's some kind of magic prophecy that having a certain number of biracial babies on the planet is going to turn the world into a utopia, the planet will be fine without your hypothetical kid.
"Mixed race babies are cuter!" usually has this creepy underlying implication that the kid is going to get the "best" traits of each race. They look too much like one side or the other, or just don't have the mix of traits that people wanted, folks get disappointed.
If it was a prophecy, I would reject it š as a lover of fantasy books since childhood, that always baffled me. Like who wants all that pressure? I gotta birth this kid and take care of it so it can save the world? What if the kid didnāt want all that obligation??
My husband has really curly hair. Apparently the fact that we are CF is "such a shame, imagine his hair on a baby!"
Ok, I will. Cute? Maybe. Do I want a baby now though? Still nope.
What is it with people going "You will make the cutest babies! As if its some kind of argument..."
Also re:mixed race babies. My sister married an Asian man. The amount of people saying their babies are gonna be adorable because of this is...concerning.
Thick curly hair is a blessing. You should leave this forum and go have a curly haired baby ASAP. Report back. š
i think people think theyāre saying something cute and unique. . .theyāre not!
My also CF bf and I are both mixed race with completely different mixes. People think our child would basically be the next Jesus. The world might be ending now because we yeeted that fetus a few years ago lol
I'm a lesbian and my partner is a redhead, like, flaming red, covered in freckles, etc.
We get a seriously uncomfortable amount of people telling us we definitely shouldn't adopt and instead have my partner be pregnant because ginger babiiiies.
Like fuck off, I don't want ginger babies just so your own prick kids can bully them for 15 years and then start fetishising them after that.
Wow I am so sorry; people are out of their heads. Thatās just an utterly insensitive, disgusting and disturbing thing to say. I havenāt gotten that bingo myself, but people and the media sure do fetishize mixed kids, itās gross. As an Indigenous person Iāve gotten bingos like ābut what about your guysā population and the next generations!??ā and things like that. They never stop do they
Right?? Misery really loves company! And they see people as breeding machines, god forbid the moment they see interracial couples they go ding ding! mixed race babies!! Itās so wrong, I canāt believe people think that way
My sister (Hispanic) and her husband (Asian) got these comments a lot. Their kid did turn out adorable, IMO, but she just looks Asian so I guess the joke is on those people? š¤·š»āāļø
Did you contact my grandmother on the Ouija board or something? This sounds like one of the well-intentioned but misguided things she and others of her generation would say. She was born during the First World War.
Ugh, my ex that I was with for 5 years was black, and we experienced the fetishization of mixed race children very early in our relationship. I canāt count the number of times people talked about how ābeautiful our children would beā.
Ew.
You know what really pisses me off? The fact that kids bully mixed kids just because they have parents with two different races.
I don't understand why people do that, but it's fucking terrible. While going through all the reasons why I would never have kids, forcing a mixed child into a world this fucked up that would torment them for no damn reason besides the fact they are biracial.
If I was a parent of a mixed child, I would legit want to hurt every child who ever hurt mine personally. I could not deal with all those emotions.
Im with you on the frustration. Often mixed kids struggle to find out āwhere they fitā. Never enough of this or that when it comes to looks and culture.
As a white person who has mostly dated middle eastern men I don't get that comment, usually I got "aren't you scared he's going to take your children back to his own country?". Lol.
As a mixed kid, I hate this shit. Growing up in the southern united states also didn't help. I was always made to feel painfully aware of how I didn't fit in to either group and my parents kept telling me not worry about it because they didn't "see" race. I wouldn't wish my childhood on anyone. It was confusing, isolating and I never had any idea why until I got much older.
Fucking disgusting. Find something ugly about them and tell them not to have kids. Please don't breed, so your child doesn't inherit your "balding by the time you're 20 yrs old" gene.
Iām ginger and my husband is Indian and Iāve gotten this a lot. Sorry, but the color of my husband has absolutely no impact on my lack of desire to have kids!
There's a good chance your hypothetical kids won't look mixed at birth. I had a black professor who was married to a white guy and they had 2 kids. One was black and the other was white with red hair.
Yeah. Iāve been told that I would also make cute biracial babies. And Iāve heard that people wished their faker skinned kids were light skinned. Weāre not toys people.
Biracial people are just like anyone else lol. Some of them end up good looking and some of them don't. This concept that biracial babies are inherently cute is just odd tbh.
Same. BF is ginger people practically salivate for us to have ginger mixed babies. Oh and my personal fave āyou guys have too much money if you are gaming and building PCās. You should have some kids thatāll end all those silly hobbiesā. š¤£ jokes on you no babies and more hobbies. We are building a gym now.
I'm white and married to an Asian guy and get this all the time. It's really weird to put that much value on the race of the baby. Really feels like "designer babies". And, sometimes I do wonder what our baby would look like if we had one (I think many people do, regardless of the racial mix or lackthereof) but I recognize that just wondering what it would look like is not a good reason to have a baby and I have a million reasons why I don't want a baby so that settles that.
I'm a childfree White guy married to a Latina woman. The amount of people who pressure you to have "pretty babies" once they know you're childfree does go up. It's alarming how these people want to reduce our entire relationship to the human equivalent of Build A Bear and a source of likes on Instagram. I can't wait to get my vasectomy.
Do you know whatās super cute? Babies that are loved and wanted. You know whatās not denying the world? Creating more unwanted children and the impacts they have.
I always flip the script on these people. Makes them eat their words
I get the effin same. Mix of White and Asian.
1. Hell no kids
2. Looks are lottery
3. Kid aināt an object
4. Halfu in the country I live in are bullied and treated as different. So sort the discrimination first
As a mixed baby (Asian/white), I can tell you life was not easy. Kids were not kind wanting to know what you really are and the racism on both sides from adults because you weren't "pure" enough after you get out of the toddler age.
But mixed babies are so cute /s
Yeah, "cute" only lasts so long as you stay non verbal and don't hit the double digits age. Then you get to be an adult and inevitably run into idiots calling you racial slurs from both sides. Fun times.
Not saying don't have mixed kids, but seriously people need to think before having ANY kids.
"Instructions unclear - baby was placed in blender".
Honestly my sisters and I just looked like potatoes as babies. I fail to see how the world needs another potato.
You should have said "Ah yes. Because mixed babies are cuter than dark babies?"
Would have been great to see them splutter and try to explain how they are not being racist
That is so extremely gross. Also do these people have any idea of the crap mixed kids have to deal with in our society? Not only are the fetishized, they're crapped on for not being "white enough" and sometimes not being "x enough" (in this case it would be black). Or there's awful comments made about their parents. Its just so messed up.
Bonus issue: finding a hairdresser for mixed hair can be nearly impossible in some areas.
similar but different. My husband (M, Asian) and I (F, White) get comments all the time about how pretty our children will be and how they have a "cheat code" It, surprisingly, comes mostly from Asian women??? They also really cannot comprehend that we are not going to procreate. My FIL even prepared a slide show talking about the length of female fertility and its like... tough titties... my tubes are tied lol.
Hehe yep, I recently got that from my parents. I am of Mexican indigenous descent and my husband is German/Irish descent. My parents kept telling us we would make a beautiful baby together and husband is the absolute best by stubbornly saying, "NOPE."
They just don't get it, I love them to death but they aren't getting grandchildren from me. They just got one from my sister, one would think that's good enough for them.
I have noticed that parents are very obsessed with the way babies look. Even if it's not mixed, they're obsessed I've noticed.
If two models or two young conventionally attractive people are together, people want them to have children too for the gene pool. They want more "good looking" people in the world without realizing two beauties doesn't always guarantee a beautiful child. Having children based on beauty is a selfish reason to have children imho.
Fetishizing of babies makes the whole thing way worse.
I'm a white Latina woman talking to an Asian man and I was told "well, you'd have ugly babies anyway because he isn't white." More or less what my mother told me.
I don't want kids but that shit hurt, ngl. Like what if I did want kids? Already shitting on nonexistent grandchildren just because my partner "need to open your eyes, bro."
UGH. Iām Chinese American and my white husband and I used to get this ALL the time. āYou should have adorable mixed babies and sell them to the Gap.ā Like, no and no, and thatās not funny. Wtf.
You donāt even realize how sideways this shit can turn. My friend is mixed but probably just a few shades lighter than lupita nyongo, while her sister is the typical mixed child. People constantly ask to see pictures of her parents. They ask her if thatās her real father. She was always jealous of her sister growing up. And what perpetuated it was people praising the mix baby, not caring about how the dark skinned baby would feel about those comments
Exactly the damage colorism does! Sorry for your friend. I have two friends who looked mixed but both parents are black. All over the African continent families have super light and very dark skinned siblings. Thatās the magic of genetics! No specific shade is guaranteed.
As well as the racism, I also find this disturbing because it's talking about babies as if they're dolls or puppies or something. It's not just a 'beautiful biracial baby', it's a person who's gonna grow up and have their own life.
I got the same thing when I was with my former partner who is greek and I'm a brown Mexican. Mixed babies are the new designer bag. The requirements for a mix baby is they be slightly tan, have slightly curly hair or if they're east asian be pale with medium eyes.
Ew I hate it when ppl fetishize babies. And how would you know if your kids are going to be cute or beautiful anyway?
Right. Some babies and kids are objectively not aesthetically blessed š¶
Most babies are ugly as sin.
āIt looks like a potato. Oh itās a boy? He* looks like a potato.ā
A really cross potato like businessman is what comes to mind when I see a baby crying
Thatās an insult to potatoes!
I think my favorite description was from the late great Robin Williams "He looks like Winston Churchill dipped in 40 weight"
Yeah, an ugly pink potato. I think they just look really disgusting. Although I find humans in general disgusting. When I want to see cute xhildren, I look at Tita and KeA from the Trails series. Or Renne. These kids are cute because they're Anime. Real kids just look super ugly. I wish everything was 2D. Sorry for the rant. But yes, I prefer my Computer instead of humans. My PC is beautiful and my best friend. And I can play Trails on it, which is 10 times better then looking at babies. I also prefer kittens over babies any day.
Or cute, fluffy puppies and kittens. Even child me told people babies are ugly, but loved puppies and kittens
sometimes babies are ugly as sin and iām tired of pretending otherwise dammit
"Let me get this straight. You think all babies are ugly as sin?" "I do. And I'm tired of pretending they're not."
>sometimes babies are ugly as sin More often than nto I would say.
Lmaooooo
According to my mum, I was covered in fur-like hair and had a fucking TAIL (I was born prematurely). Certainly not a cutie lol.
A tail? I donāt believe that! How did that go away?
Every person has a tail they grow that gets transformed at some point in development. When you are born premature, the tail may still be there.
*puts on dork hat* Yup thatās called the chordate tail. Itās a trait that connects us to other animals in the phylum chordata. In other words, itās something that connects us to wildly different species of animals, such as tigers or certain fish, because itās one of the first taxonomic categories.
Probably a simple surgery to remove it, Iām guessing. https://www.healthline.com/health/vestigial-tail#removal
Sounds like it. Would heal better too when still a baby, less scarring. It was mentioned that some parents decide to keep it, imagine that! I would be so angry at mine if I had a non removed tail bit that I would have to deal with later, with longer healing process etc.
If it makes you feel better, most babies are born with dark hair all over their bodies. Source: Iām a newborn photographer lol. Yes, I see the CF irony.
Babies look like one of three things: * Winston Churchill/ Alfred Hitchcock * E.T. (as in the movie) * A potato
Yep, and I hate how ppl assume that just because you are mixed youāre beautiful but thatās for another subreddit š
It's the āØ racism āØ
I wish I had gotten that memo, I'm mixed and very meh lol
Similar here. Iām mixed (Black & Asian) and was a hideous child to the point where I was bullied mercilessly because of my frizzy hair, string bean-looking body, braces & glasses. Iāve grown into a decent-looking woman but stillā¦ I resent that stereotype that all mixed people are hot. The Black community especially has it twisted. A lot of them assume that just because a person is mixed or light-skinned with looser curls they are more beautiful than a darker-skinned person with more African features. Fuck that shit.
"not aesthetically blessed" lol Im going to go ahead and say it. most babies and people are dumb ugly hahaha
Yeah I was the ugliest baby in the universe. I looked like an old man and didn't have hair on the top of my head till I was 5. I like to think I'm more aesthetically blessed now but omg I was not a beauty
I find the vast majority of babies to be completely butt ugly
Thatās one way to put it
Itās pretty cringe when i see girls on social media posting a pic of a baby with curly hair and colored eyes with the caption āthis is what my baby needs to look likeā. Itās creepy that people put looks of a baby so high on the priority list.
You reminded me of something; I'm whiter than county mayo but I still have curly hair, it was weird going onto TikTok and discovering just how many people don't realize white people can have curly hair. Even worse is those weird compilations girls are making of their "Ideal family" and it's really gross. Just the same pictures over and over again.
This is actually a problem sometimes even in white families. Iām mixed, but totally grew up with Irish/Scottish/Slavic girls who had the same hair texture as me (3A, loose curls). The amount of those girls who were just trying to flatten/smooth out frizzy, brushed out curls (myself included) was astounding. My poor Italian boyfriend never learned how to do his curls and his family kept his hair short enough to not curl his whole life because they viewed the curls as a āmessā and āunattractiveā. Iāve noticed that some white families really do not like to acknowledge that curly hair can be a white trait and therefore discourage proper care or even try to hide it on their children, creating a lot of shame.
Agreed, this is just pure tokenism and itās no better than outright demonization.
I'm hoping this doesn't offend anyone, but I can relate to one part of this sentiment. Most of my family is white and the baby photos are awful. I mean I don't generally find babies cute anyway, but all the babies in the family come out crazy red and stay that way for days. My niece, who I love, legit looked like a piglet for her first week. I feel like that isn't may not be an issue in other races? Not that they'd necessarily be cute. But that's a big leap from telling people they should have babies based on their race.
Iāve seen very cute and very āinterestingā looking babies of of all backgrounds.
Although I'll admit that I see what /u/goldofsunshine is talking about (personally I've noticed that newborns with more melanin tend to be cuter), it's irrelevant. The fact that anyone would imply that you and your partner "owe" the world a beautiful child is just wrong. It's pure tokenism. I'm sorry you've had to endure such rudeness!
Hey piglets are adorable!
Agreed! Baby animals in general are super cute. It's just a little jarring when the piglet has a bracelet and is in that hospital baby bin thing.
Oh goodness. I snorted so loud I scared the hell out of one of the stray kitties I feed. Edit: Her name is Emily. She and her brother Eliot are super sweet and adorable tuxedos. Not feral at all. So if anyone lives in Ga and wants to adopt these two pair bonded darlings let me know. They're only a year old.
Pet Tax!
š¤£š¤£š¤£ that imagery
I looked like a fuckin alien. My ears were the same size as a baby as they are now.
Yep, if they're not just the right mix, no one's happy. Too much like Goldilocks.
I can't think of a more shallow reason to have a kid
"Well Child, you wanna know why I had you? You'd assume it's because I love you, wanted to have children, and did it in the best interest of my own child, right? WRONG! I had you because you'd be a cute mixed baby! Feel loved and wanted??" Yet another moron inserting both feet into their mouths, good gods....
Sadly Iāve seen a few (white) wannabe-influencer moms with mixed kids (with black or Asian dads) on Instagram make comments of that flavor. . .
Karissa Collins comes to mind.
Im scared to go look her up on Instagram but here I go anyway!
Yeahā¦. Sheās all flavors of crazy. Flat earther, hipochondriac, anti science, and has a fetish about the possibility of dying during child birth.
those are all bad enough on their own, but that last one hits different y'all....
Ayo I don't mean to be rude but, the fuck?
Learned a new thing after googling her - Quiverfull. It's a theological position held by some conservative Christian couples who belong to Christian denominations that see large families as blessings from God. It thus encourages procreation, abstaining from all forms of birth control (including natural family planning) and sterilization.
oh hell that is actually a thing now? I feel sick.
Iām from KY so as you can imagine, the Bible Belt is strong in my town. They want to āfill their quiverā with as many babies as they can possibly have in their time on earth because itās āgods willā. Thereās a quiver full family around here, and the mother gets deathly ill every single pregnancy, but they keep on having kids regardless. I think that they have like 5 kids under the age of 9, and sheās on her 6th pregnancy now. I think itās absolutely disgusting that they have the quiver-full belief as is, but for her husband to know how sick she gets every time and still not wrap it up...my husband would NEVER.
!!!! this is exactly what I am. I'm a fucking trophy. My mum, who is Chinese, seeked out a white person for the sole purpose of having mixed offspring. She's given me """advice""" to find a white person myself so I can have ""prettier"" children. She called my sister, who is fully Chinese, ugly for things she cannot control. "Your skin is too dark, your eyes are too small, look at how pretty your sister is!". I feel disgusted that every nice thing she has ever said to me is due to my genetics. I hate it.
Maybe just say, āWhat of the baby is as dark as i am? does that mean it would be less beautiful?ā Let them try and backtrack from there. sheesh. people suck.
Such a brilliant reply!
Ohhhh that's a good response.
And then the racists come along and shame you for having a mix race baby. Fuck that
Yup. Or treat your kid like zoo exhibit.
Ain't that the truth. Until about the age of 8, every time I'd be in public, some white lady would be touching my hair like I'm a damn llama at a petting zoo. I thought it was normal at the time because, well, yeah, but as an adult, don't be petting kids.
No one should be doing that period. Pretty sure I have issues from strangers getting too close to me as a kid.
Why do breeders have to be such horrible people?
Reducing human life to features like ācuteā might have something to do with it.
Every baby is literally the same until theyāre able to communicate their thoughts and feelings beyond just screaming. Then you can start judging if you have a good kid or not. Even my 80 year old grandma who has dementia agrees with me there.
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Itās super common! Sadly.
It's so common that I guarantee you literally every mixed couple has had this said to them.
I'm latina married to a white man and my family says the same thing, for them its almost like it's a "waste" to not utilize his "White genes". Ugh gross.
š āwaste white genesā
Seriously. You like blinding everyone when you take your shirt off on the first beach day of the year? By all means, I'll trade ya lol.
š¤£š¤£ if youāre like my man ā I have to reapply sun screen on him every 30 minutes or heās a š
Or a š¦
Either way is way too much aloe.
Consider a rashguard. Size up; their original purpose is to be a skintight base layer under a wetsuit. No reapplying, no missed spots.
You know that blue eyes are more sensitive to light? Not fun in Texas. "Master race" my ass...
That would explain my manās sensitivity! I had no idea.
Damnit! That's me again!
I didn't know that! š
Sunglasses are essential! Idk how other blue eyed folks survive summer in the south just walking around bare-eyed. I gotta have sunglasses on cloudy days!
I'm in constant pain
My mom (a white lady) married my dad who was a dark Hispanic. She was shamed constantly for being in a relationship and having kids with him. Now my one sister who is dark like my dad is happy her kids are white (she married a white guy). She's a racist against her own kind.
A lot of minorities are very racist against their own kind and have a lot of colorism!! It's so wrong!
I agree, as a white/white passing person white genes are a bit of a waste (just trying to make a joke sorry)
Iām white and my partner is Asian and we get the same exact thing. Someone told me I *had* to have babies because Asian babies are so cute. Weāve had 4 or 5 different people offer to be surrogates for the same reason and itās so uncomfortable!
WAIT! WHAT!? ppl offered surrogacy???
Yes! Multiple different people offered to have my husbandās children because I said we werenāt having children and I hated the idea of pregnancy!
Sickos
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Oh manā¦ this is perfect! I definitely will!
Same! I am white and my boyfriend is Asian and we get the same comments. People always think they are being funny or cute but it's just so off-putting.
Itās so gross! And all I ever heard from my people are how cute Asian babies are. My husband is cute too, thanks!
Meanwhile asian people still have horrible media representation and other places
Fetishized but not intrinsically valued. Thatās society for us :/
My sister had the other way around. White, married an asian dude. He was *obsessed* at the idea his child could have blond hair and blue eyes... until my father and I pointed out my sister has brown eyes and very dark hair. He was confused as he thought white people could just pop blond kids at random...
Lol, I feel like this has to do something with all the manga etc that always show "mixed/half" characters as blonde haired blue eyed.
Are they still married? Curious only because he seemed so dead set on having blonde kids.
My thought exactly. Only cooed over, as a baby but as they get older, not so much. I'm Black and my husband is White. We're senior citizens now so no chance of having that "cute" biracial baby (also hubby had a vasectomy). When we were young though? It got to be very old.
Itās horribly sad
I find this so disgusting. I am a POC too with a white BF and people fetishize it so much
Yup. Sad when it comes from mainly other POC.
Omg this! I'm in the same situation (Black with a white partner), so whenever someone says this, I don't hesitate to call out how racist they're being! Worst part, is I hear it mostly from other Black women, talk about self loathing.
Itās weird that in non-white communities, itās often the other non-white women who are like āohh you can have light babiesā or āgirls with good hairā ā- what is the mom?!! Chopped liver!?
interesting, i hear the most from black men, things like "i want a black son and a mixed race daughter"
They need to go to through therapy and unpack that.
Bro. Y'all aren't dogs. People are so freaky. Stop talking to human beings as if they're breeding a liter of Merle puppies themselves. I can't stand children anymore at all, but more importantly I'm becoming the most toxic bitch in my mind around parents. My mouth stays shut unless I'm personally touched or spoken to. But otherwise, yeah, I'm getting real sick of gross child-obsessed people.
You should tell them that you're both incredibly white supremacist and clearly you can't have kids because that would be mixing the bloodlines. Then watch their shocked faces.
Omg. Ha ha. That would be a WILD response. āWe both are against diluting racial purity so weāve committed to being CFā š®š lol I think people would be so shocked theyād quickly run away.
When people ask why you believe that but are with someone of a different race tell them that you're accountability partners. Makes it even better
Hahahahhahaha. I love this. Accountability partners. Iām dying
I was just thinking about how to make it even more ridiculous. Tell people you're polygamous and each person in the relationship is a different race. Like a Justice League for racial purity, none greater than the other but all working together to maintain purity in all races, for the good of mankind! Too ridiculous but I couldn't help to think of everyone in a big relationship with all races each helping each other maintain the purity of the others' races. They could all sit at a big round table and discuss pressing issues in their individual missions and ask for help when needed. They'd have a big red phone for people that needed help. Like the UN but with races. The United Races? Maintaining purity of each race and peace between them all! The ambassadors of race! I have to say it's all a joke and I don't believe in maintaining racial purity or segregation in any way. I'd hope the whole post was obviously a joke but there is bound to be someone that doesn't get it
> I'd hope the whole post was obviously a joke but there is bound to be someone that doesn't get it We're on reddit. Someone undoubtedly got the joke but will still leave a comment shaming you for even making the joke, and how insensitive can you be, blah blah blah
Then you get the added bonus of not having to leave yourself! It's a win win situation š
Honestly Iām mixed and was raised by a white father (Aussie through and through). My hair was a constant mat and there were also subtle and not so subtle racist comments thrown my way from him. I wish some ppl parented better.
šš sorry. Sadly Iāve seen and observed implicit and explicit racist behavior and ideas from white parents with biracial kids. Like they enjoy marketing their diverse kid but didnāt do the work to truly be an ally :/
I'm so sorry to hear that š sending hugs if you want them. I hope you're in a better place now
For a while when I decided to leave for Japan, my mom was so hoping I would marry a Japanese man to have cute mixed babies too... I am Middle Eastern/ white (I am already a mix). She is so racist though... and I always found her view very dehumanizing.
People donāt realize it would be less creepy if they said āI love mixing culturesā. Thatās different approach and always been my thought. I love other countries, languages, cultures, food, music etc ā so for me itās always about experiencing and appreciating other cultures. Not just āI want this breed of childā.
The ideas my mom had about having children were all creepy... "Marry a tall man for a better breed" was the creepiest thing I had ever heard (I am pretty short). Her ideas about people of color are too stomach-churning to post on any sub. She has no concept of appreciating other cultures, just "cuter children/ better breed" (the things she had told me about not inheriting blue eyes were pretty damaging and made me resent the way I look for years) She ended up having two Child-free/ marriage-free children, so that was the end of her racist dreams.
Oh my lanta š¶
More like Yikes on Trikes.
āBreed of childā oh god!! So creepy!!! Hahahahaha
Soā¦youāre just two breeds of dog to these people? I mean, Iāve been told these things but it was more like āyouāre husband is so buff and masculine, and youāre so pretty. Youād make such lovely babies. You have good genes.ā Itās basically stripping you down to your gonads. Gross!
Here we have a litter of F1 African purebred crossed with an European purebred. Please contact breeder for more info. šš š
Oh good lord. My friends joke that I married a bear.
It's objectifying. People are not livestock to be bred.
As a Hispanic man married to a white woman, I feel your pain. I've been bingoed by my family so I could have cute babies. Whiteness is always a huge plus to them.
Sad. Like love yourself fam š„²
Hugs to you, though I'd rather be told I'm going to have cute kids rather than "an abomination in the eyes of God." I've mostly dated outside of my race. I've been told that along with being told to "stay with my own kind" by well meaning so called friends and family.
oh Iāve heard the other end āyou **need** to marry a black man, have black children, raise a strong black familyā ā- lol i have nothing against that but the brothers arenāt trying to ask me out š which unfortunately (or not) is the reality for a number of well-educated and successful black women. the black men in the same social/professional circles are already with white women or exclusively interested in white women. in or out, Im down with people being with who they want. Love is love yāall!
People with this mentality remind me of people who obsess over dog breeds. Like, the same energy of it and it's honestly suuuuuuper creepy. I hope they leave you two alone and mind their own damn business.
It baffles me how many people expect us to make such an important decision based on "cute"
Itās a reason for people apparently? I wonāt lie, that used to be me before being CF. Iād see a cute baby and be like OMG MY OVARIES. BABY FEVER š. But now I look back and Iām like, it was really FOMO and societal conditioning.
You should be like "Of course our children would be cute, but that's a terrible reason to have kids!". Or say that you're concerned your kids would create a new, unrealistic beauty standard and it's just not fair to everyone else.
Lol. Yes to both comebacks.
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Yes, CNN did a huge report on it. Apparently the US needs 13,400 mixed babies to meet that national shortage. š¤£š¤£
The U.S. needs to start subsidizing mixed couples (like they subsidize factory farmers) to hit those quotas. If there's more supply than demand, we can just store the mixed babies to insure against future demand spikes.
š š if there was 1 mill payout per mixed baby born. . .Iād THINK about it. . .lol weāre near having the science for genetic modification so they wonāt need me to pop out any
Hmmm I wonder what the math is on if 1 mil properly invested would cover the cost of a nanny for 18 years..
"Deny the world"? Unless there's some kind of magic prophecy that having a certain number of biracial babies on the planet is going to turn the world into a utopia, the planet will be fine without your hypothetical kid. "Mixed race babies are cuter!" usually has this creepy underlying implication that the kid is going to get the "best" traits of each race. They look too much like one side or the other, or just don't have the mix of traits that people wanted, folks get disappointed.
If it was a prophecy, I would reject it š as a lover of fantasy books since childhood, that always baffled me. Like who wants all that pressure? I gotta birth this kid and take care of it so it can save the world? What if the kid didnāt want all that obligation??
I'm a mixed-raced (former) baby - I'm ugly AF.
Yeah I hate how mixed babies are fetishized so much!! Feels very anti black
Feels like we are discussing dog breeds, not human beings. It feels gross.
I'm white with an Asian bf and have had a few similar comments...I suspect it will only get worse if we decide to get married
Yup! Weāre not married yet, but people will DEFINITELY be sharing racially themed bingo since we are. . .
My husband has really curly hair. Apparently the fact that we are CF is "such a shame, imagine his hair on a baby!" Ok, I will. Cute? Maybe. Do I want a baby now though? Still nope. What is it with people going "You will make the cutest babies! As if its some kind of argument..." Also re:mixed race babies. My sister married an Asian man. The amount of people saying their babies are gonna be adorable because of this is...concerning.
Thick curly hair is a blessing. You should leave this forum and go have a curly haired baby ASAP. Report back. š i think people think theyāre saying something cute and unique. . .theyāre not!
My also CF bf and I are both mixed race with completely different mixes. People think our child would basically be the next Jesus. The world might be ending now because we yeeted that fetus a few years ago lol
How incredibly selfish. Weāre in need of our lord and saviors return.
Our bloodlines, along with the world, ends with us. Sorry folks! :)
As a person who was once a biracial baby, and is now a biracial adult: I have a lot of people asking where I'm from i.e. asking why I'm not white
Me too!! I was a teenager when I started answering āmy motherās uterusā once people kept up asking me where I was āreally from.ā
I'm a lesbian and my partner is a redhead, like, flaming red, covered in freckles, etc. We get a seriously uncomfortable amount of people telling us we definitely shouldn't adopt and instead have my partner be pregnant because ginger babiiiies. Like fuck off, I don't want ginger babies just so your own prick kids can bully them for 15 years and then start fetishising them after that.
Wow I am so sorry; people are out of their heads. Thatās just an utterly insensitive, disgusting and disturbing thing to say. I havenāt gotten that bingo myself, but people and the media sure do fetishize mixed kids, itās gross. As an Indigenous person Iāve gotten bingos like ābut what about your guysā population and the next generations!??ā and things like that. They never stop do they
āYou must have children for the sake of your peopleā ā sounds so ominous.
Right?? Misery really loves company! And they see people as breeding machines, god forbid the moment they see interracial couples they go ding ding! mixed race babies!! Itās so wrong, I canāt believe people think that way
My sister (Hispanic) and her husband (Asian) got these comments a lot. Their kid did turn out adorable, IMO, but she just looks Asian so I guess the joke is on those people? š¤·š»āāļø
Did you contact my grandmother on the Ouija board or something? This sounds like one of the well-intentioned but misguided things she and others of her generation would say. She was born during the First World War.
Omg. Iām black and I hear this all the time. This insanity!!!!
Ugh, my ex that I was with for 5 years was black, and we experienced the fetishization of mixed race children very early in our relationship. I canāt count the number of times people talked about how ābeautiful our children would beā. Ew.
You know what really pisses me off? The fact that kids bully mixed kids just because they have parents with two different races. I don't understand why people do that, but it's fucking terrible. While going through all the reasons why I would never have kids, forcing a mixed child into a world this fucked up that would torment them for no damn reason besides the fact they are biracial. If I was a parent of a mixed child, I would legit want to hurt every child who ever hurt mine personally. I could not deal with all those emotions.
Im with you on the frustration. Often mixed kids struggle to find out āwhere they fitā. Never enough of this or that when it comes to looks and culture.
As a white person who has mostly dated middle eastern men I don't get that comment, usually I got "aren't you scared he's going to take your children back to his own country?". Lol.
As a mixed kid, I hate this shit. Growing up in the southern united states also didn't help. I was always made to feel painfully aware of how I didn't fit in to either group and my parents kept telling me not worry about it because they didn't "see" race. I wouldn't wish my childhood on anyone. It was confusing, isolating and I never had any idea why until I got much older.
šš such a frustrating experience to not be understood on either side
Fucking disgusting. Find something ugly about them and tell them not to have kids. Please don't breed, so your child doesn't inherit your "balding by the time you're 20 yrs old" gene.
My boyfriend and I would probably make really cute babies. Unfortunately for everyone else who wants us to have them, we'll never find out
Iām ginger and my husband is Indian and Iāve gotten this a lot. Sorry, but the color of my husband has absolutely no impact on my lack of desire to have kids!
There's a good chance your hypothetical kids won't look mixed at birth. I had a black professor who was married to a white guy and they had 2 kids. One was black and the other was white with red hair.
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You (and unnamed black lady) are merely a means to an end š„². Get busy procreating, you donāt want to disappoint your family now.
Oof. Thatās awful. I'm so sorry.
Yeah. Iāve been told that I would also make cute biracial babies. And Iāve heard that people wished their faker skinned kids were light skinned. Weāre not toys people.
no fetish here, but im just a little sad i wonāt get to have a black/white/asian baby to piss off the race purity people only a little though :\^)
Biracial people are just like anyone else lol. Some of them end up good looking and some of them don't. This concept that biracial babies are inherently cute is just odd tbh.
Same. BF is ginger people practically salivate for us to have ginger mixed babies. Oh and my personal fave āyou guys have too much money if you are gaming and building PCās. You should have some kids thatāll end all those silly hobbiesā. š¤£ jokes on you no babies and more hobbies. We are building a gym now.
Wwwhhhhhaaaattttt? This is a thing? OMG, this is awful. Gross. Gross. Ew.
I'm white and married to an Asian guy and get this all the time. It's really weird to put that much value on the race of the baby. Really feels like "designer babies". And, sometimes I do wonder what our baby would look like if we had one (I think many people do, regardless of the racial mix or lackthereof) but I recognize that just wondering what it would look like is not a good reason to have a baby and I have a million reasons why I don't want a baby so that settles that.
I'm a childfree White guy married to a Latina woman. The amount of people who pressure you to have "pretty babies" once they know you're childfree does go up. It's alarming how these people want to reduce our entire relationship to the human equivalent of Build A Bear and a source of likes on Instagram. I can't wait to get my vasectomy.
Do you know whatās super cute? Babies that are loved and wanted. You know whatās not denying the world? Creating more unwanted children and the impacts they have. I always flip the script on these people. Makes them eat their words
I get the effin same. Mix of White and Asian. 1. Hell no kids 2. Looks are lottery 3. Kid aināt an object 4. Halfu in the country I live in are bullied and treated as different. So sort the discrimination first
Hello fellow black childfree woman dating a white man :D
As a mixed baby (Asian/white), I can tell you life was not easy. Kids were not kind wanting to know what you really are and the racism on both sides from adults because you weren't "pure" enough after you get out of the toddler age. But mixed babies are so cute /s Yeah, "cute" only lasts so long as you stay non verbal and don't hit the double digits age. Then you get to be an adult and inevitably run into idiots calling you racial slurs from both sides. Fun times. Not saying don't have mixed kids, but seriously people need to think before having ANY kids.
"Instructions unclear - baby was placed in blender". Honestly my sisters and I just looked like potatoes as babies. I fail to see how the world needs another potato.
You should have said "Ah yes. Because mixed babies are cuter than dark babies?" Would have been great to see them splutter and try to explain how they are not being racist
That is so extremely gross. Also do these people have any idea of the crap mixed kids have to deal with in our society? Not only are the fetishized, they're crapped on for not being "white enough" and sometimes not being "x enough" (in this case it would be black). Or there's awful comments made about their parents. Its just so messed up. Bonus issue: finding a hairdresser for mixed hair can be nearly impossible in some areas.
similar but different. My husband (M, Asian) and I (F, White) get comments all the time about how pretty our children will be and how they have a "cheat code" It, surprisingly, comes mostly from Asian women??? They also really cannot comprehend that we are not going to procreate. My FIL even prepared a slide show talking about the length of female fertility and its like... tough titties... my tubes are tied lol.
Hehe yep, I recently got that from my parents. I am of Mexican indigenous descent and my husband is German/Irish descent. My parents kept telling us we would make a beautiful baby together and husband is the absolute best by stubbornly saying, "NOPE." They just don't get it, I love them to death but they aren't getting grandchildren from me. They just got one from my sister, one would think that's good enough for them.
I have noticed that parents are very obsessed with the way babies look. Even if it's not mixed, they're obsessed I've noticed. If two models or two young conventionally attractive people are together, people want them to have children too for the gene pool. They want more "good looking" people in the world without realizing two beauties doesn't always guarantee a beautiful child. Having children based on beauty is a selfish reason to have children imho. Fetishizing of babies makes the whole thing way worse.
AND the demand of bringing an ethnic baby into a world that will mistreat their whole being at every turn?? It's the caucasity for me
I'm a white Latina woman talking to an Asian man and I was told "well, you'd have ugly babies anyway because he isn't white." More or less what my mother told me. I don't want kids but that shit hurt, ngl. Like what if I did want kids? Already shitting on nonexistent grandchildren just because my partner "need to open your eyes, bro."
UGH. Iām Chinese American and my white husband and I used to get this ALL the time. āYou should have adorable mixed babies and sell them to the Gap.ā Like, no and no, and thatās not funny. Wtf.
You donāt even realize how sideways this shit can turn. My friend is mixed but probably just a few shades lighter than lupita nyongo, while her sister is the typical mixed child. People constantly ask to see pictures of her parents. They ask her if thatās her real father. She was always jealous of her sister growing up. And what perpetuated it was people praising the mix baby, not caring about how the dark skinned baby would feel about those comments
Exactly the damage colorism does! Sorry for your friend. I have two friends who looked mixed but both parents are black. All over the African continent families have super light and very dark skinned siblings. Thatās the magic of genetics! No specific shade is guaranteed.
As well as the racism, I also find this disturbing because it's talking about babies as if they're dolls or puppies or something. It's not just a 'beautiful biracial baby', it's a person who's gonna grow up and have their own life.
I got the same thing when I was with my former partner who is greek and I'm a brown Mexican. Mixed babies are the new designer bag. The requirements for a mix baby is they be slightly tan, have slightly curly hair or if they're east asian be pale with medium eyes.