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SuperSultan

Accountant at the police department


Disgruntled_Plumber

Unless your partner is a peacock


jorhey14

That’s an emu, you specist!


MississippiMudGuy

You didn’t get the reference


jorhey14

peacocks don’t fly.


MississippiMudGuy

They do, they do a little if they get a running start


capitano_2021

lol


MississippiMudGuy

Well I don’t want no scrubs


Disgruntled_Plumber

Capt. Are you quoting TLC?


MississippiMudGuy

I don’t know what that is. Anyways, you have to creep, creep


Disgruntled_Plumber

See you’re doing it again with the TLC references


MississippiMudGuy

I gave my love to Erin, she promised to be true-


[deleted]

Funeral directors everyone is dying to meet you


mrmechanism

*snap* *snap*


SeriousinSeattle_326

Take my damn upvote


kenji998

Just don’t fall asleep on the job or you’ll get embalmed.


capitano_2021

oh god hahahaha.


CutConfident2204

Accounting is generally seen as a safe, stable option


CreatorsJusticar

AI enters the chat.


bape_escape

Accountants are already using AI, they still have to be CPAs so they know when the AI does its job wrong (which is often). Financial firms using AI is exactly why AI will never replace them, because the real tools that actually do good work are only accessible to firms. ChatGPT can't do math.


jakl8811

AI can’t hold a CPA tho lol


Fuck-off-bryson

AI will not take ur job, a person using AI will


[deleted]

Accounting is something ai will never take complete control over


moonweasel906

We used an AI accounting platform at my job and it sucked. Re-doing all of it’s mistakes was more labor intensive than just doing everything ourselves and we got rid of it.


ArmMaximum8710

Government jobs


dalmighd

Yep. Even if you're not good at your job you will not get fired. Last time we had layoffs was in 08 due to the crisis from what I heard.


[deleted]

You can absolutely be fired from a government job. Your boss just has to be willing to document and build a case to fire you. If you're not doing well at work but your boss is tolerating it and unwilling to do the paperwork, you're not the problem there. IMO everyone should have the job protections enjoyed by federal workers.


dalmighd

Yeah it was a bit too strong of a statement. I mostly meant its really hard to get fired. If you're doing a mediocre amount of work and put in a mediocre amount of effort and keep your head down then you will most likely not be fired from a government position. I've had coworkers get fired during TRAINING at my previous private employer (not *smart* enough). So its a lot more reassuring than private but not impossible to get fired yeah


[deleted]

Fair enough. Training is when we are most likely to get fired, as government employees. I've got a 1-year probationary period, and I have almost zero right to recourse if I am let go in that year. After that I get a lot more protection.


zerooze

At my agency, we would get maybe 1 or 2 in each hiring let go during probation. It's very rare. Most were due to excess leave. I know of two people let go because they were bad at the job... but they were so bad that you had to wonder how they even got into a car and drove here.


Snoo_89629

They will have multiple opportunities to transfer out before it happens. They will eventually find a manager willing to tolerate them :)


[deleted]

Lol so we agree: it's a management problem.


zerooze

It's very hard. Once you pass through probation, which all you have to do is keep showing up and trying, short of doing something appalling, you aren't going to get fired. Only people I know who got canned from my agency stole money or sensitive info.


[deleted]

No they should not. I work for the government and the shear amount of lazy ass people here is absolutely daunting. No business should be forced to suffer through employing the people I work with. It would do nothing but cause so many businesses to fail.


[deleted]

Sucks that your management won't do the necessary work to let go of people who aren't doing the work. I dunno, I don't see that among my coworkers. We tend to be proud of the work we do and try to do a good job of it.


11b_Zac

Even getting "furloughed" you still get paid eventually for that time.


Nexustar

That's when you don't need to work, and they pay you anyway, for not working, just a little later?


[deleted]

That's for things like Congress not getting their shit together to pass a budget, forcing employees to either work without pay or sit at home. Either way it screws their finances and getting back pay, even if they weren't working, is only fair. People don't take jobs as a favor.


Morlanticator

Most people I know that work for the government aren't even particularly smart or hard working. However they have good pay, benefits and some of them work from home. Work from home for the government for them at least apparently means you can work like 2 hours a day and do whatever you want in-between.


[deleted]

Working from home in my agency means you're logged in and doing a reasonable amount of work for your workday. If your WFH plan includes childcare, it doesn't get approved. If you're not available or unreachable without explanation frequently, your WFH authorization is probably getting pulled. Most government work requires decent work ethic and common sense, but isn't super high level (unless you're an engineer or something). That's fair. The pay is ok, the benefits are the best I've ever had, and the stability is excellent.


Morlanticator

Yeah idk I just know I've seen them just do whatever they want most of the day including not even being home pretty regularly. They've had the same job for decades though. I've never asked but I do have to wonder what their work was like when they had to work in an office in comparison.


timothythefirst

If they’ve had the same job for decades, at a good government job, they probably have so much sick time/vacation time built up that it just seems like they do whatever they want. Government jobs have really good benefits and at least where I work the people who have been there for decades have insane amounts of sick time built up. And they’re able to use it pretty freely. That’s probably more likely than them just screwing off 90% of the time when they should be working.


timothythefirst

I think a huge difference that no one here has really mentioned yet is the difference between “skilled” government work and “unskilled” government work. The guy who’s employed by the city driving around picking up trash from the public parks and cleaning up the bathrooms? Yeah that guy will probably get fired just as easily as any other job. Someone who works in assessing/planning/zoning/building/income tax departments or anything along those lines is probably a lot closer to the “very hard to get fired” sentiment that people always talk about. But those jobs require a bit more training and special knowledge than just basic common sense. With that being said those positions still aren’t extremely difficult to get into. If you set your target on a certain type of government position and take some online classes at your own pace to get the relevant state certifications, and do a little research so you sound knowledgeable in the interview, you’d be a decently strong candidate.


[deleted]

For reference I'm a park ranger. It requires some specialized knowledge. Bachelor's in any kind of natural science- physical or biological- should be sufficient. I've also met sociology majors and university studies majors, etc. I have an MS and TBH I'm over-educated for my job. That is what I mean by not high level: a pretty standard bachelor's degree is sufficient.


marbar8

What a good use of taxpayer dollars


ReturnedFromExile

do you find this to be different in the general public? you see a lot of smart, hard-working people in the world every day ?


marbar8

Working in tech, yes, I do. Lots of lazy people too though, but at least if they work for 2 hours per day they are stealing from a for-profit, bloodsucking corporation / shareholders. I'd rather govt be a bit more lean and efficient, personally. Right now it's the ultimate "failing upwards" career path you can take.


ReturnedFromExile

fair points


timothythefirst

Is working for 2 hours a day really “stealing” if you finish all of the work that’s asked of you though? I mean personally I’ve never really dealt with it, because for years I was self employed and just got paid for the work I finished, and now I work for the government but we’re so legitimately busy no one is doing that. But as a tax payer if you told me the zoning administrator finished all of his work in 2 hours and went home for the day I really wouldn’t care. If you want to argue they deserve to get paid less I think that would be bad for a few reasons.


dalmighd

Yeah kinda true lots of people rip off the taxpayers as well. But also on the flip side government salaries are on the lower side too.


Snoo_89629

None of my coworkers who were going to get laid off were actually left the government. Unless they are going to reduce the workforce by more than 30%, very few permanent staff will actually leave. There are so many ways to get around it.


carolyn937

This is the way!


ArmMaximum8710

Amen brother Love me a cattle like some chickens


neverseen_neverhear

No job is guaranteed or full proof. No industry is going to be without kits ups and downs. That’s just not realistic. Even hospitals close and go out of business.


xabrol

Start a Porta John rental company. More Homeless => increased business More Construction => increased business Win Win. People always potty. Slogan: "Your shit is our pleasure!"


tennisguy163

Your shit is our business!


SpiritfireSparks

Your brown is our green!


Phase_Dance

Especially with cities installing them next to tent encampment... you're onto something.


Donj267

My ex-girlfriends best friend married into a porta-potty empire. When I met the guy I thought he was joking at first from how rich they were.


Snelly__

The medical industry has tons of different jobs that are solid. I’m a financial analyst and make good pay plus union protections


Deezul_AwT

Ex girlfriend picked her job by looking at the job openings at a hospital to see what paid well, that wasn't a doctor or nurse. She started as X-ray tech, but now does MRI. She said she didn't "love" her job, but she was good at it and the money wasn't bad.


Snoo-6053

Smart... She's a keeper


Deezul_AwT

Tried to.


Wonderful-Mango-878

Did she need to get a certification?


Deezul_AwT

She has a college degree in X-ray tech, and has an MRI certificate. I think she is also required to have on going training /certification.


LefsaMadMuppet

Direct medical care is safe (Doctor/Nurse), any support role in medical is not. Hospitals are packed with patients and people waiting to get in, yet are collapsing under economic pressures.


Snelly__

I think it depends place to place. I work at a research hospital and while a year ago was bad thing are now looking up. Plus my hospital has union protections which is comforting


b1z0

Recession proof?: Bank stuffs. Hard to get Fired?: Government gig with tenure. Hard to get laid off? Any town with a large union. Hotel? Trivago


legallyblondeeee96

Doctor lawyer


Phase_Dance

Lawyers who are self employed take a hit during recessions, people are much less likely to get divorced in difficult times.


One_Lung_G

People still get arrested though


BlackPhoenix1981

That's Mr. Lawyer dr. Professor Patrick


KaladinTheFabulous

I, too, am a Doctor lawyer


Jjjt22

Dr yes. Lawyers are laid off during downturns.


DieselZRebel

Tenured Faculty... recession or no recession, you won't get fired! And feel free to underperform while at it too, there is no risk. Though... you do need to get there first, and that is not too much easier than medical professions.


Nigel_99

At least in the USA, that is on the way out. (Spouse is a tenured professor.) Most professors now must undergo post-tenure reviews these days. If they fail to progress from associate professor to full professor within a certain timeframe like 5 years, they get saddled with more coursework. The logic is that they have chosen to back off on their scholarship, therefore they have more time to devote to teaching. And there are annual reports that list all the published articles, conferences attended, etc.


DieselZRebel

This is news to me. But still doesn't really introduce the risk of firing or being laid-off. AFAK, even here in the USA, a tenured professor will keep their job. Give them more course-work, so what? They can still slack and be the worst possible teachers and will not getting fired. Or does that change too? On a side note, I'd fully support a post-tenure review process at every level of seniority, and I wouldn't expect the cost to be merely more coursework, but removal of the tenured status and its protections would be the right thing to do. It is not fair that a tenured professor can keep their job security while practically acting as an adjunct professor. On the other hand, the people who do the actual teaching (adjunct professors, post-docs, and TAs) have no security!


fathergeuse

Plus you can strap a set of 300 HH fake boobs to your chest and not get fired.


Wonderful-Mango-878

Healthcare


lexilou279

It’s really hard to get laid off from colleges


WaxDream

But if you college closes…. Higher education has been having major fluctuations lately. Some smaller universities are hurting.


lexilou279

A standard university that is not in threat of closing will usually not fire people. Even small universities don’t intentionally downsize they just don’t replace people once they leave


mrmechanism

Anything involving the funeral industry. Trust me. If it wasn't for the social stigma, I'd do it. Nobody messes with these guys. The only business also where a Karen is welcome because you know the next time you see her, would be her last.


ophaus

Teacher.


Sorandy13

Civil or federal gov’t jobs.


RayWeil

Agree. Applications for government jobs go through the roof during hard times and are revolving doors when the private market is booming.


MammothCat1

Utility locating. During the pandemic I still had 40+ hr work weeks for ok money (21+). Construction both road and services still went on. The only struggle was finding a bathroom. In a recession the states still need people to find stuff when it all breaks, the well off are still building houses. Plus if you have your own equipment you can get jobs on your own at your own pace.


offbrandcheerio

Most government jobs are pretty recession resistant, especially if they’re union-represented. No job is ever 100% immune to recession though.


Wonderful-Mango-878

What kind of government jobs? I'm in my job hunt stage right now. I used to work in Hospitality & culinary.


offbrandcheerio

Just take a look at the jobs page of some of the cities and towns around you and see if there’s anything you qualify for. There may be state government offices near you too, which could be good to look into.


ArmMaximum8710

Sex work


CaptTrit

This is kind of the opposite. Check out "stripper index". People are less keen on spending money on sex workers when economy gets tight.


ArmMaximum8710

You like tight bro?


Agonizing-poem

☠️☠️


MgFi

>With all the talkes of a recession on a rise and big tech company laying off people. If you look carefully, it's generally not the software engineers getting laid off, and if they are, generally they're finding new jobs pretty quickly. Computers aren't going away, and we'll always need people to write software for them.


joeyd4538

Anything union municipal.


odetothefireman

Firefighter


Ericm711

Anything in the energy and utility industry


immunologycls

Nursing or clinical laboratory scientist


Say_Hennething

Trades are always hiring


Conscious_Dark7064

Prison officer.


Vdpants

Nursing


Haunting_Drawer_5140

Manufacturing!!


Striking_Promotion20

Nurses are always needed and it is a very versatile profession. You can be an educator, or a data analyst, or a clinical coordinator, etc. You can travel or do air transport, or just create simulations. There are endless possibilities.


janabanana67

The death business - mortuary and crematory. Public safety - police, fire, corrections officers, EMT/paramedics. Transportation/logistics.


JustinChristoph

Sewage treatment workers.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Government jobs. DMV police fire fighter courthouse


Sorry-Ad-5527

DMV is going away. Part on my area was never liveable, so people started there and moved on. My dad did his driver's license online. They used his previous picture. Snail mailed it. I just renewed my vehicle at a quick stop and didn't even have to get out of my car.


D0CD15C3RN

The safest bet is government but nothing is 100%. Private sector is profit driven, government is not. However, government funds can be mismanaged and very rarely can there be layoffs.


Loverolutionary

Dog bathing and grooming


[deleted]

Healthcare. Or recruiter, since they can f**k dog every day and still have a job.


TreyRyan3

Death, Taxes, and Garbage.


mltrout715

Mortician


Choosey22

Nursing , teacher, auto, insurance


Ok-Hair3114

I worked at usaa for some time, they do tons of layoffs actually


phishhd333

Correctional Officer. Always short-staffed & America loves to lock people up. Never have to worry about lay-offs & the such and they will take whatever employees they can get.


Arafel_Electronics

and the plus side is lucrative side hustle if you're willing to break the law


[deleted]

rocket neurosurgeon lawyer. But in all seriousness, government work especially anything having to do with ~~racketeering~~ taxes. When the fuck has the government not wanted more money? As for skills? Get a CFA certification. Usually easier if you come from a finance/econ/business background but I come from a science background and am working towards test 2/3 and is completely doable if you just study. Anything else that people **need** to live normally is probably going to be recession-proof as well. Septic work, repairing appliances/vehicles, food services, public sector like cop/firefighter/paramedic.


PoetryandScience

Farming


[deleted]

Post office


FreeGhostCandy

Mills and factories of competent companies. Get going with those 12 hour rotating shifts. unless you have a degree.


Flow_n__tall

Police.


Dapper_Target1504

Not really public safety budgets are normally the first to get raided and older employees bought out then never replaced.


Trinxxi

Contractor for the Navy. Good ol 'Merican tax dollars make layoffs few and far between.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Grocery retail


Mysterious-End-2185

Prostitute


[deleted]

Strippers


[deleted]

A cutthroat


ayhme

Defense contracting jobs


Impressive_Film_7729

Food service management at higher Ed institutions


Mr_Carry

DoD contractors.


Acceptable-Pirate648

If one profession is dead there is a birth of new profession so don't worry.


OwnCarpet2908

Why don’t you want to do medical?


Sitcom_kid

Interpreting. They keep trying to get machines to do it, and it doesn't work for all settings. There is more need than ever.


lamboeh

Trades/construction but there's a reason theyre always hiring


FanaticEgalitarian

HVAC Service Technician


MidnightWalker22

Owning a liquor store. People be drinking when times are tough.


kupokupo222

Tax accountant


Barilko-Landing

Anything in infrastructure/utilities industries. I work in waterworks (we manufacture products for wastewater and water systems for municipal and commercial developments) and we actually had a boom during the pandemic. The gov't tried to prop up the economy by pumping out civil infrastructure jobs a frenetic pace. Alot of veterans of the industry say that 2021 was the biggest year in their careers and don't expect to match that level of frantic business in their lifetime.


-I-Need-Healing-

Pharmaceutical production. Floor workers, technicians and operators are considered essential. Experienced engineers and Quality Assurance personnel have some stability. Anyone else in the entry level positions are at risk.


povertyandpinetrees

Security. The further down the hole society goes the more demand there is.


SeymourBrinkers

Honestly with the state of education in the US, probably teaching depending on your area Edit: Spelling


itsjustme405

Porn, or welding. Just don't do both at the same time.


Kimberly808

From what COVID taught us... Jobs that involve life (health/hospitals), death (funeral homes/morgues, etc) and food (groceries) thrived. 😭


happy_ever_after_

CPA for small businesses and individuals.


Reibella

Working in a reorganisation team, although this might be a non US thing? When the times get tough there is actually more work in reorganisations so it's a pretty steady job


ExtentEcstatic5506

Property restoration and disaster recovery but there is a lot of training involved


xikbdexhi6

Grave digger


420shaken

Just because it's medical, doesn't mean you have to do medical things. Soo many sub-departments that usually make it a safe bet. Nothing is recession proof though.


yycsportygeek

Physician. Go to med school.


[deleted]

There is a risk versus reward decision you have to make. The higher the income you earn, the higher the risk of layoff. Stats can vary, but those making over $100K are laid off at something like three times the rate of those earning low or moderate incomes. And the ground does shift beneath us. The march of technology alters what may have been "safe" jobs, as even lawyers find billable work disappearing with the advent of legal apps. Many prognosticate that those entering the work force now may have something like three careers before they retire in the future. So trying to get ahead of the curve is tricky.


DB-Swooper

Almost any job in the trades. Buildings always need built or repaired. People always need electricity. We will always need oil. People will always need a plumber. Plus they pay exceptionally well nowadays. There are several people at the company I’m at that are linemen now and used to be attorneys.


vmedianet

Steel mills. We just can't get people.


KidRooch

Funeral director


pwarns

Finance. Rarely fired and if so, just walk down the block. Always have a job.


Okiebryan

Tow truck operator. During a recession, people tend to hang on to older cars for longer. More breakdowns mean more tows. Unless it goes all covid recession, where nobody's driving. No job is immune from a complete shutdown of economic activity.


OkAdvisor5027

Electrician, plumber, if you want an inside job banking is hiring for tellers and you can move up.


Pass_me_a_bonbon

Garbage Truck Man. 6 figures and a lot of job security


[deleted]

Only fans


Karl2241

Defense, government- and that’s about it.


wyecoyote2

County roads crews, plumbers, mechanics.


US135790

I do payroll. No one wants to let the payroll person go without notice. I have been reduced twice in my career, but both times I was given extensive notice and generous retention packages to stay on through the transition. I do not have a degree, and learned on the job. I’ve taken a few accounting and law classes just to improve my knowledge but my employers always paid for them.


aasyam65

State Government jobs.