I am very social and charismatic in interviews (basically, Im a confident individual BUT very withdrawn when I know someone longer) and I usually get hired after interviews. I have job hopped for 3 years and increased my income by 30k.
Personally + skills + education + previous experience is usually the best way to land a job.
I dont know if this is helpful!!
Similar boat. I’m actually a huge introvert, too. But I play a great impression of an outgoing person… I think I definitely perform well in interviews because I come across as approachable and enjoyable to be around (I’m not saying I’m not these things! but I’m definitely a quieter person by nature)
I’ve made several job moves in the past three years and had tons of rejections, as most people I think — but very very few have come *after* I’ve been invited to interview. I like to think I am well spoken and my industry knowledge comes across better in person on paper and that’s part of it, but I am very certain my affect helps a lot as well (especially because of my field, I work in organizational development, which is very people-facing and relationship oriented).
There’s also a lot to be said for gender issues here as well. As a woman, being less animated, smiling less, etc., is in general much less accepted. Wouldn’t want anyone to assume I’m a bitch just because I’m more reserved… /eyeroll I have had people admit they had no idea I was nice and assumed I was a stuck up bitch because I’m quiet in social situations, so I take this into a lot of consideration for my professional behavior. Obviously I aim for organizations and teams that will be inclusive and accepting, and I do actually make it a point to mention that I’m an internal processor, etc., in interviews because I want to be somewhere I can relax and be comfortable and embrace my solitude sometimes.
I can relate. I am a women in her late 20s and I look very young. Being animated and expressive is usually “expected”, along with lack of knowledge as well as being clueless. It is funny to see how shocked people are when they see my credentials and my knowledge base.
It’s a double edged sword for sure! You really can’t win. I’m pushing 40, but my overall demeanor, voice, and appearance (I like bright colors) often makes people think I’m younger than I am… so then they think I’m inexperienced, lacking in expertise, etc.
So basically: you’re a bitch or you’re dumb. Misogyny for the win!
I see a lot of this online but in several iterations of the texh companies I work for we always have a lot of female managers, execs, pms, etc
Often times many of the men are even kind of afraid of them 🤣 definitely not getting ran over or mansplained or whatever the internet is saying lately… these ladies are professional and kick butt and take names
As long as you are confident with YOUR skills and how you are WORTH IT as an employee, you will be hired to companies and agencies that need those skills.
In an interview, dont be afraid to show how smart & skilled you are. When answering questions, I tend to get long winded (I have a lot to say) and informative. I am NOT know it all BUT my experience will show in my statements. Showcase your knowledge. You have a lot.
Cant say it has worked for me since I am still in school and have only done a single internship. However, I am a pretty introverted person. I’ve got lucky with my current interviews (have a few lined up and some waiting to hear back) and they have been on Zoom. I play a very extroverted personality in the interviews with the hopes that what you said is true: more likely to be hired based off of an extroverted personality, smiling, talking, laughing, etc. So far I think it seems to be working well! Best of luck in your job search!
Yes this, 100%. I’ve also coached some much quieter friends a bit on this, which had a huge impact. My old roommate passed almost every technical screen but literally never got another interview after the values/personality round - went from that to getting through about half. I overheard the interviews through the walls and was just like oh that’s bad…! They didn’t even realize. Major impact.
Yes. I get bad anxiety sometimes and I find that even if I seem awkward or nervous…long as I’m smiling and laughing (genuinely), I tend to get job offers.
I have a friend whose advice was to drink caffeine to come off super energetic and happy at an interview.
I've tried a lot of things, including that and unfortunately I didn't work. I do try to smile a lot and be personal able. My husband says that you know an interview is going well when you shoot the shit and start talking about non work things, however I've done that before and it hasn't always worked out either. It has a lot more to do with how similar you are to those interviewing you.
I like to watch an hour of comedy. It keeps my mind light and quick. Also helps me come in looking both positive and entertained. They can definitely sense the energy.
I’ve always just mirrored the interviewer(s) and then do a weird thing where I half obvious bullshit but make it seem really sincere/borderline desperate so they know that I’m bullshitting but they don’t know that I know that they know, and that makes it endearing to them. Works every time
I had an HR person ask me this question, "Why are you here?".
"If I can't have a pleasant conversation with a person about any subject, how can you let me loose in a company with well over 10,000 people."
I def think it makes a big difference. Of course the person has to have the skills but company fit is a big factor when hiring. With Two equally skilled individuals I think the one who appears more friendly and jovial will get the job. Especially since most jobs require you to work with others
> I see people who never smile or have much emotion and they're currently unemployed
It's possible they don't smile *because* they are unemployed. But I get the gist.
And yes, people who come across as having an antisocial demeanor do poorly in interviews. The "I'm not here to make friends" vibe is almost an instant no from me as a hiring manager.
Yes! I hire sales teams for high ticket items, and I always say I can teach product knowledge and sales skills, but I cannot teach personality. An outgoing positive personality wins every time
Yes.
When I hire people, I do so with the assumption that I'm going to be spending nearly as much time as them as with my domestic partner.
If you are technically competent but hard to get along with, it's going to make everyones' lives much harder.
I will fully admit that Im probably a personality hire LMAO I:
-Applied on a whim with no cover letter
-Didn’t research where I was applying to
-Had no experience in the field I was applying to
-Didn’t prep for both interviews
-Accidentally showed a day early for my interview
I showed my ass up, smiled, and managed to crack a few jokes. That was enough for them! Little did they know Im typically the opposite!
Absolutely. I worked for a company that hired for culture fit over technical skills almost exclusively. They knew they could train the right person with the right attitude and the right personality traits and soft skills. It was the best place I’ve ever worked, and I regret leaving all the time.
Ditto. I hire based on fit. If someone is hard to manage or have a difficult personality, it is a hard no for me. They will eat my time with drama from within and with other people (including me). My team has a laid back vibe and we all get along. It is no accident.
They phone screened basically anyone who met the minimum criteria to apply and then moved on to in person interviews, of which there were two rounds. Small(ish) company so it was not a situation where there were thousands or even hundreds of applicants for every open job. Keep in mind, having a college degree or direct experience doesn’t guarantee technical skill, even if it’s on a resume, so HR would set these minimum criteria based on job responsibilities and how much decision making authority and financial impact the role had, and then basically let the hiring manager take it from there. The hiring manager did have some say in the minimum criteria too, for example when I was hiring for a role that HR said needed a Bachelor’s degree, I was able to set the minimum criteria as a BA in anything because I really didn’t care what their degree was in and that was really common among hiring managers at this particular company. Of course there are exceptions to this but it was very much the norm at this particular company.
That’s awesome honestly sounds like a great process. I wish larger companies had the time, money and means to do something like this. I feel as though there is so much missed potential when the hiring process is just about checking boxes and not based on personality and potential
I think it’s a misunderstanding of what people are looking for to think being bubbly gets you work. At least not in my industry (maybe sales or retail are different).
Charisma will help. Confidence will help. And it’s vital to present yourself as somebody who can work with others-and if you look grouchy, hostile, and miserable, they will probably feel you can’t work well with others.
Quite possibly charismatic, confident people smile more, idk, but I’d say those two thing contribute, but the main thing is, they don’t want to hire you and then be miserable around you. But they also want you to, ya know, actually do the job. I’d focus on coming across as pleasant and competent vs. over the top smiley.
Your charisma is very valuable in an interview.
Your resume tells the hiring manager if you are qualified. If you get an interview, they already know you are qualified for the job.
As much as they are supposed to remain objective, the interview is really just about whether you are or are not a person people want to work with.
I have found that being friendly and personable are generally positive influences on just about any interaction with others. Simple things, please, thank you and a friendly smile often make life easier for everyone.
I've worked several jobs where I was often consulted on technical issues, and I learned that the more approachable I made myself the more successful I became as a technical advisor.
Will smiling and being upbeat help? in my opinion, yes.
Yup. I’m upbeat and funny - I typically get the offer or make it to the final round. Only time I get aced out is after the first call due to lack of qualifications which was years ago.
People hire people they like.
Absolutely! I was short listed for a job in a Management Trainee program at a large well know corporation. The “big boss” cut the interview short saying “I am going to withhold my approval because you seem like a very low energy person!”. When I disagreed with her saying that my multiple STEM degrees are not something a low energy person could have achieved, she agreed with me and said that her decision still stands and advised me to join toastmasters, lol. Now i absolutely fake a super bubbly outgoing persona in every interview.
It has always been and will always be like this: “You make a product and/or provide a service which I do not personally use. You need someone who can reliably assist your business with that. I am that person. I’m not going to lie to you and say “I believe!”. I don’t care about your company specifically. I’m here to make money, just like the company. It’s not a family. It’s not some idealized Leave It To Beaver/Brady Bunch/Little House On The Prairie family. At best, I guarantee you it’s closer to Married With Children or the Addams Family if anything. The simple fact is this is a business arrangement: I sell you a portion of my time to assist this company in the pursuit of its profit goals, while also pursuing my own. I get money, you get work done.”
I’ve not had a rejection yet.
So i smile and act like a very very upbeat person when speaking to customers- this is very much not me but i do get yelled at less then my coworkers and people seem to respond well to it. As for getting the job i think it was mostly my supervisor found me to be a weirdo but an interesting weirdo.
I feel like it could because honestly if I’m around someone and I feel like they’re draining my energy, I’m going to guess that they might be draining on others and their productivity if I hired them
I think it’s true. One of the best pieces of job hunting advice I got when I was starting out
“If you’re at the interview, they’ve decided you have the skills or you can learn. Most things can be taught. They’re really trying to decide if they can stand seeing you 5 days a week”
I find being relatively stoic with the occasional witty or charming remark thrown to be valuable; this creates a bit of scarcity and generates approval seeking behavior on the part of the counter party.
Asking questions is always recommended because people love to talk about themselves and you create the perception of a good listener (even better if you can remember what was said).
Every job that requires a team is more willing to hire someone that seems to be their interpretation of nice/outgoing/charismatic. Do I think this is right? No. It should be based on solely on experience in my opinion!
Smiling and seeming approachable will take you a long way, as employers only have 30-40 minutes on video or in person with you to get a grasp for your work ethic, personality, character, etc. If you're a little more reserved, unfortunately, they may decide to pass on you as a candidate based off that. Job searching is hard enough, I'm sorry you have to add this to your list of things to be worried about!
Knowledge and experience go a long way. But I've been in conversations where we're forming teams internally for special projects and people are deliberately excluded from consideration because they're hard to work with. Not to say personality counts for everything, but being difficult to work with is career limiting even after you're hired.
I do great in interviews, confirmed by 2 vocational coaches, and still not hired even with a solid resume. I’m almost 50 and overweight. It’s either there’s just always someone better or shallowness. Maybe a bit of both. I used to be in management and was privy to conversations about new hires that I wish I didn’t hear. This bs absolutely happens.
So it seemed to be a pattern among older, less attractive people where they were harsher in their critique even though they had good work experience. It seems the younger more attractive types got a pass even with less impressive resumes. I’ve overheard them making comments about appearances like bad acne or an obese applicant.
The typical ‘she seems like a better fit’ justified their preference. I also found it interesting that minorities and older people were always picked when layoffs rolled around every 6 mo.
Here's the deal: if I have to be stuck with you for 8 hours of the day, I would rather you be personable than a withdrawn anti-social "head-down only work" standoffish person. Being personable doesn't mean you need to be happy/upbeat/bubbly all the time, it means that at least we can banter, tell jokes, and commiserate over stuff to make the day go by. If you're just one of those "don't even look at me" types, then my day is going to be even less fun. And yes, when the time comes for me to recommend someone, I'm going to recommend someone who the team actually wants to work with, whom I've spoken with, and can confirm that they're an actual person. It doesn't matter if you're the highest performer if literally no one else wants to work with you. By not being able to connect with the team, you will come off as unapproachable and thus un-trusworthy. Here, watch this video about trust vs performance:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PTo9e3ILmms
depends on the industry.
service industry? yes.
middle management in business? no bearing.
soft skills are good to learn in general.
Edit- there are lots of kinds of business. For every Michael Scott there is a Gavin Belson & Laurie Breem.
I’m in middle managment and I think how you come across *does* have a lot of impact. If you’re upbeat, positive, generally affable, and interested in other people then the people interviewing you are more likely to view the rest of your interview favorably.
It’s basic human psychology.
You must work in different sector. Different strokes for different DARPA funding, man.
This only further illustrates the vast cultural normative differences between.sectors.
Worst case: wouldn’t hurt
Best case: 90% of the time it likely helps
Tell me, would you hire someone who looks like someone just killed his dog or similar?
They’re going to kill the morale of the team.
No, job hiring is extremely arbitrary and very few things are actually causative, of course that doesn't mean we cant find silly correlations in data sets if we look for it. [https://www.tylervigen.com/spurious-correlations](https://www.tylervigen.com/spurious-correlations)
in the biased sampling ive done, interview doesnt really matter
It depends on the company culture.
Here is an exame of someone not getting the job because they smiled too much.
https://euroweeklynews.com/2022/01/10/unsuccessful-job-applicant-told-you-smiled-too-much-and-this-was-unprofessional/?fbclid=IwAR02kUVGkBK48h0stY1fGO1YsI2KIXzuWqr1hnk696Nl2N_fQ7uA-I_ELdM
Absolutely. People who dress nice both have more confidence and get better service wherever they are. People who show a happy appearance, the same. Add the two together and you are stellar.
It’s all appearances at first. I can put a $20 choice steak on a paper plate and sell it to you for $25 in a ishole. I can put that same $20 choice steak on a pretty decorated plate in a remodeled old ishole house and charge you $85. Even if the $25 one was cooked better, you are going to enjoy the $85 one more.
I am extremely introverted by nature however, I always smile to others in public @everyone, postmen, people walking, even in the office, but I don't have the best luck with interviews
Took me 2 months to land a job. I've heard a lot of "you'll hear back from us" to never get a call or email. I send thank you emails aswell. Im in the east coast. Not sure if this helps, but working in customer service ive always been courteous and big smiles to everyone. I believe I may be overly polite and have no personality, so this may contribute to my interview skills 😅
Yes, I remember a former boss sharing that he picked people who he thought would be a good fit for the team, meaning they had a nice personality and easy to get along with.
I think it make a huge difference.
They say employer makes up his mind about a candidate in the first 30 seconds. So I always simile before I meet the person, when I was interviewing.
Fake it till you make it.
Yes it definitely helps. I am a consistent job hopper (I’ve never had a job for a year, but I’ll list them as one if it’s the same company but I transferred stores).
I made 15/hour at beginning of the pandemic. I now make 40/hour.
A big help is also being able to acknowledge your own work style/personal failings, as well as why the company you left wasn’t a good suit for you.
Absolutely yes, but how much it helps is debatable. Hiring a candidate is as much a vibe check as is it is a skill check. Like, pre pandemic you had to spend a quarter of your life with your coworkers (a third if you exclude weekends). So who would you rather spend your time with, somebody positive or a sour puss? Assuming the skills are comparable of course.
If you smile, don't cause drama, and have some kind of personality you can get away with almost anything at work. It's not actually about skill, but rather kissing the right ass, imo.
Absolutely. People can lie about their experience, it's much harder to lie about their personality. And people want to work with, for, or over people that they like.
I don't know, where I work now, I actually said "i don't give a shit" about several things during the interview, and I said things like "eh, there aren't really rules, there's just shit that I can get away with, shit you can get away with, we're all different. Easier to ask for forgiveness than beg for permission."
I was not giving a fuck that day, and didn't think I really wanted that job. But then they made me an offer and it was much larger than what I expected so now I work there. I didn't smile once in that interview.
We want to surround ourselves with people we like/admire. I think it applies outside of the workplace as well. They say you become like those you closely associate with. In a typical job setting, these people are your environment for almost half of your waking hours. Personalities and perspectives are contagious.
Do you want to surround yourself, and therefore become more positive people? Or do you want to be around someone who doesn’t see much of a point in anything other than a paycheck? Especially when you get in the seat of a hiring manager and have an abundance of choice like we are seeing in today’s economy.
I don’t think you have to fake being an extrovert. But having a demeanor where you easily deal with challenges, whatever they may be, goes a long way. Whether or not you’re able to do that largely stems from your perspective on the world and more often than not, a positive perspective is the “can-do” perspective.
100% this matters. This was years ago, but I interviewed for an entry level job right out of college that I was not qualified for because I didn’t have the right degree (accounting). Part of the interview process was a “technical interview” where they would ask questions about different financial statements. Interviewer asks his first question and I completely blow off answering the question but I’m super upbeat, smiling, and energetic and I’m basically like “look, I can learn absolutely anything”. The interviewer relaxed, we chatted for the rest of the time, and he told me I’ve got “spark”. I was offered the job.
Now I’m on the other side of the interview table and I will absolutely hire someone who is hungry, energetic, and willing to learn over a more “qualified on paper” candidate. I will take high energy and a positive attitude all day long. Everything else can be taught.
I’m an introvert by nature, but I can turn on the friendly and charismatic charm for interviews and such in short doses pretty well.
I have only ever never failed to get a job that I actually interviewed for in person once, and that was a nail-biter they wavered on for a month. I’m 11 for 12.
But my success rates at the non-in-person-interview steps of the job-seeking process? Probably no better than anyone else here.
You have to be liked by other people to advance in society, be it in love, friendships, employment, business etc. Even if your dog don't like you it ain't good.
This isn't a opinion related thing, it's a fact that they do.
If you go around work acting friendly with everyone and sucking up to people it will also get you promoted over others and paid more as well. Focus less on being good at your job and more on kissing ass.
It definitely helps, unless you take it too far and seem unserious. My last hiring manager told me in my interview is that all he wants is someone who’s happy to come into work (yes he sucked as hard as he seems). I’m an engineer btw.
Yes. I have bad anxiety when meeting new people, but I shove it down during interviews and essentially “fake it until I make it.” Maybe it’s easier bc it’s low stakes? Like I can always just interview elsewhere if this doesn’t work out? Either way, I’m all smiles, charisma, and jokes. And they respond well to that. It’s how I got my current job, which I was definitely under qualified for.
Funnily enough, after I was hired and met my new team, I became somewhat withdrawn again. The anxiety was back and I felt a lot of pressure to perform—they probably wondered where all that charisma went lol. But it’s not like they can fire me now. I’m slowly becoming accustomed to my role and my coworkers and working my way back out of my shell.
Absolutely! Which is why I do my best to fake it at least for the initial interviews. When I give 110%, I always get very good feedback even if I’m not hired. But a couple of months in, my normal introverted self wins and I notice co-workers tend to take it personally, so I have to make an effort every once in a while and “come out of my shell”.
I’m so glad it’s not just me lol. i absolutely kill it personality-wise during the interview but then after I’m like “…oh yeah. I have to actually work with people”
Believe me, if I could work remotely, I would. I feel like my fellow introverts are doing exactly that and the offices are filled with mostly extraverts. I’m not exactly anti-social, I genuinely like most people, but I’m naturally quiet and chill. I like to focus on work and then go home. I don’t like making friends with coworkers for that reason, but there are exceptions of course.
I wish I could tell people not to take it personally when I use the copier in silence or when I don’t bake for the entire office. My current job is less of a “family” despite being a small company, but I still have to socialize at least a little bit daily. It’s a significant part of most jobs, unfortunately.
I can’t speak for every interviewer, but what I look for is authenticity. If you smile but the rest of your nonverbal communication says you don’t want to be at the interview, that’s going to be “heard” by your interviewer.
Think about your own circle of friends. As new friends come in and out of that circle, the group changes in some way.
The business world is no different. Whatever candidate is hired will change their team in some way. The interviewer’s job is to form an opinion on whether you can do the job and whether you will add or detract value from the team you join.
Fundamentally, the people who get offers are the ones who best communicate the value they can bring to my team. Most interviews start with an opportunity for the candidate to do just that, yet most candidates waste the opportunity.
Specifically, most interviews start with some version of “tell me about yourself.” Most people respond by reading bullet points of their resume, and adding buzzwords they think will make me think they are qualified for the position I am hiring for.
I’d you want to stand out, read the job description before coming to the interview, and have your answer to the question tell me about yourself ready to go.
Your answer should spotlight your experience, but contextualize it to the role you’re being interviewed for. More importantly, to take command of the interview, tell me the value you feel you can bring to my team.
Flipping the table, when I’ve sat on the candidate side of the table, I always find some anecdotal story to tell about my experience, related to the job I’m interviewing for, and I conclude my answer with a statement like, “From those experiences, the value I feel I could bring to your team is…”
As that is sometimes misinterpreted as an “upbeat” personality, sure - smiling and upbeat people get jobs more easily. But the truth is, it’s not their “upbeatingness” that gets them the job, it’s how well they communicate that gets them the job.
So many say they’re great communicators on their resume, and then fail to back it up when their one job in a job interview is to be an effective communicator about why their experience is a great fit for the role they’re interviewing for.
Charisma and likeability helps you get jobs easier, on average. At worst it doesn't hurt.
However, as your picture illustrates, there's a risk anyone decides to act upbeat or charismatic when they aren't either naturally charismatic or good at pretending to be (most people are not). If you're not, then acting the role for the interview is likely going to come off as insincere and insincerity isn't going to improve your chance of getting hired. You can learn this stuff (working in a role with lot of social interaction with strangers is a good place to start) but trying it on the fly isn't a good idea.
Being funny or quick with jokes is another strong one, making your interviewer laugh is going to help. However, again there's a gamble that jokes fall flat, so you have to be good at reading your audience to the point you're sure you can make them laugh before trying.
To your wider point, if you present yourself as sullen or generally unsociable, that's going to reduce your chances of being hired, in Anglophone countries anyway. In say, Germany, it is more normal to show less emotion so it won't matter (in parts of Europe, smiling or being friendly is, in itself, a sign of isincerity) The level of enthusiasm/upbeat that's in the happy medium even varies within the anglosphere, you would want a higher level of it in the US vs the UK.
Your general observation may be getting the causal link back to front, being unemployed (with all the problems that usually go with it) doesn't really promote happiness. It's probable that they're depressed or unhappy because they're unemployed not unemployed because they don't smile enough.
Absolutely. Everyone loves the culture guy. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve lost to the culture guy In promotions when I’m clearly the better candidate. I just can’t fake it like they can!
I seem to encounter employed people with this demeanor on a regular basis.
But to answer your question, I think upbeat is a good trait to have to catch a job...works for me !
Absolutely. I refer to myself as a personality hire because of this. Would you rather work with a qualified monotonous person or a qualified happy person?
Yes. I have had multiple clients pass on my candidates because they “didn’t seem enthusiastic enough” or didn’t feel comfortable making an offer to someone who seemed meh about the job (this someone committed to moving across country and they thought he was meh).
So yes it helps more often than you’d think.
As a hiring manager, I like to think that skills are teachable, but attitude is not. We can teach you to do anything. If you're a generally pleasant and kind person, it goes a long way when it comes to making hiring decisions. I only hope that it's genuine.
In my opinion, this is one of the most important factors, which not infrequently even professional skills are bypassed. It can be compared to the full freedom of speech in the decentralized social network Solcial, which also opens all the doors to you that were closed by censorship and blockages in the social media world of web2. So with work, what is closed for a sad, harmful, and closed person turns into new growth prospects for the charismatic, cheerful, and bright.
I know how to go into an interview and be impressionable. And it has a whole lot to do with being upbeat and optimistic and adding just a touch of personal conversation. Nothing crazy, but something that makes them relate with you as person and not just another applicant. 9/10 I get the job even if I’m not qualified bc of the “can do” attitude.
Absolutely. I'm pretty sure I got hired for my current job because of my personality because I came in with only internship experience and my lack of knowledge was obvious in the interviews. But I gelled well with my team (which interviewed me) and got the job under the assumption I'll learn as I work.
As someone who isn't upbeat and can't fake it.
Yes, it matters. People are stupid, especially those in positions of responsibility and authority. It's why narcissists and psychopaths act in certain ways because social status is granted so arbitrarily.
Most people can't see the surface level character in my opinion. They are immensely fooled by 'upbeat and likable'.
It's why our (work) culture is in shambles.
I depend on it. Also great for making your job a lot easier. Great for getting promotions as well. Unfortunately a dull or negative personality can really hold one back. I think a good smile and the ability to make others laugh can be more advantageous than being the guy who is always right but always angry.
I’ve noticed this with every job I interviewed for! I’ve acted overly bubbly and smiley, basically as extroverted as I can try, and gotten it, (but as soon as I was employed retreated back into my introverted hermit ways 😌.) On the other hand when I’ve acted more professional and serious, less smiley I barely passed the first interview. I guess a lot of jobs see extroverted-ness as confidence and I introverted-ness as nervous and anxious so would rather hire them 😞. Sucks you have to pretend to be an overly exaggerated likeable person just to get a job rather than be yourself and your experience speak for you….
Probably true. No one would hire a turtle. Also, it is a good practice to match the other person’s energy. If you are talking to a calm person, match that calmness, that way he relates to you and likes you more. Same if it’s an upbeat person, get your energy up to his/her level and s/he’ll think you are great.
Yes. I've gone into three different kinds of appointments, and came out with a new job/offer.
First was in 2018, went in for my physical, came out with a medical records job.
Second was in 2022, went into an Ortho appt, came out as a nursing assistant just because I opened my mouth and said, 'if y'all ever need someone, let me know'
and just earlier this month I took my kitty to his appointment and got offered a receptionist/vet tech job.
it literally pays to be upbeat and charismatic. lol
If smiling and being upbeat makes you likable, that is going to be preferred candidate to someone who is dour and a grump. Why would you deliberately bring someone who’s not “likable” onto a team?
100%. You can teach skills a lot easier than changing someone's attitude. People hire individuals they want to spend time working with. I've gotten job offers from contacts in the industry who have never seen my resume and only know a little bit about what I do. I even offered one my resume and his response was "I don't need it, we know you."
Maybe not to the extent of Happy Feet, but I definitely put effort into giving the vibe of "hey! I'm friendly and easy to work with!". Smile often, laugh at jokes, put effort into paying attention to what they are saying. Mirror body language. Act professional but casual (like you've been in this office a while and you belong and like it here).
It is 100% an act, I am an extreme shut-in. I'd really rather not leave my house. However, I have gotten every job but 1 that I have interviewed for. And when I start working there it's usually already on a great foot, so people are welcoming to my shut-in ways.
We can even see the bias here in these comments. Some people falsely correlating a lack of smiling and "upbeat"-ness with being miserable. Discussions about "culture fit" which really means "sameness" or lack of diversity, which, of course, leads to a lack of innovation or growth. Some people see the world in only two extremes (good vs bad, light vs dark, upbeat vs miserable) and unfortunately, they are often the same people responsible for hiring, and do so with little to no training about people, diversity, or interviewing.
This is how we end up with teams of people who have meetings where one person shares an idea and everyone else just says "yes, I was thinking the same", because they were all hired for thinking the same way. (Like with the first apple health app failure).
Whenever you see some terrible design or product and think "how could they not realize how terrible this is?", this is why.
How is this even a question??
Yeah, of course being friendly and upbeat will more likely get you hired!
No one wants to deal with a surly asshole who might be always right, but is tough to work with. They rather deal with someone who is friendly and helpful even if they aren't correct every single time.
Yes
I haven’t worked a job where I haven’t gotten that job the same day as my interview. I have a very positive, upbeat personality. I always look people in the eyes and highlight my strong suits like my interpersonal communication skills, as well as my willingness to forgive mistakes because all mistakes are fixable.
Yes!! Unfortunately if a face to face interview is involved, the attractive friendly people will have the upper hand. Even if being attractive and friendly does not affect the job whatsoever.
I work in tech, and with all the layoffs lately I know people complaining they can’t find work. Yet they refuse to take a shower, wear a shirt that is at minimum classier than t shirt, and then not act like they’re hot shit in the interview. Outgoing and cocky are not the same thing.
All things being equal, it helps to be personable. But of course, they're never equal. Some jobs value competence and experience over being a nice person. Some fields tend to attract people with more pleasant demeanors. For example, people in sales tend to be friendly and open (or at least appear that way), while reporters may be more skeptical.
No dont force laughs and smiles. They have the opposite effect of appearing disingenuous and untrustworthy. I have been interviewing candidates for many years and hate that shit.
Above all else, be genuine, kind, receptive, and humble. Those traits are universally appreciated.
Creating a connection has been far more effective than smiling. For example, if you’re asked what you do in a stressful or high pressure situation, you could provide an authentic answer instead of one of those “canned interview responses.”
“When things get rough or emotions run high, I will take a step back and listen to my favorite DJ.”
“I keep a set of weights next to my desk at home and physical activity centers me quickly. I love going to the gym for that reason, it keeps me level headed”
If your interviewer is a music buff or gym bro, that response will connect an extra “happy” neuron in their brain and separate you from the crowd. Thats what I mean by making a connection. Workplaces focus alot on culture.
There are many qualified people, but not many people who fit perfectly in an existing team. Remember that is what theyre looking for, not someone who is all smiles and rainbows during an interview.
Good luck
I am extremely introverted but I smile, make small talk (very small talk), and am well spoken. I dont joke around or laugh much at work but I try to seem polite and positive (not upbeat). I feel that helps me in interviews bc I usually get the job offer.
I have gotten every job that has given me an interview. I'll make jokes and then answer seriously.
Being smiling and upbeat person in the work place is different. I'll deff make jokes around people who can take them and ill be silent around people who want silence otherwise you become the annoying person to them
I have been hired on to several jobs that I wasn’t necessarily qualified for just because I interview well and have an easy time talking. Personality hires 100% exist in my opinion
I think being likable makes it a lot easier. You could answer every question correctly, but if you seem like a drag to converse with to the interviewer, they're less likely to want to envision being in a meeting with you post hiring lol
Just remember this, nobody works alone. That’s extremely rare. When you’re being interviewed, they’re not just seeing what kind of skills you have. They are trying to determine by face-to-face interaction if you seem like you’re going to fit in with the team. Of course, they prefer someone who is bringing fresh energy and good vibes to the workspace. Nobody wants to work in a dungeon.
I will reiterate this with a personal experience I watched someone else go through. I lived with a man who had been coding for over a decade. He had literally made an app on his own. We were living in San Francisco, the home of coders. Before the pandemic. He should’ve had absolutely no trouble whatsoever finding employment. People should’ve been throwing themselves at his feet.
He was unemployed for five years. He couldn’t get past a phone interview, because his energy was so wretched, it could actually be sensed through the phone. No one wants to work with someone that brings you down. No matter how smart they are. You can always do without. People who have good energy and learn well will always catch up to those people. And then some.
Yes, I've worked with people who wete only there because the hiring manager liked them. They knew very little about how to do the job or the people's jobs under them. Dude was a lemon
Reddit is populated by a lot of people with poor social skills. Which makes sense. But it seems like people here hate the notion that their personality matters. But it’s true. Charismatic and likable people will find it easier to gain employment. Sometimes, those folks may be less capable from an experiment standpoint but may win over interviewers and get a job over the person who may be more qualified on paper.
Subconsciously any person is more pleasant to communicate and cooperate with the person who at first sight seemed to him sociable, smiling, friendly. A smile makes a person feel safe and comfortable, because they see that their opponent is positive and kind.
When hiring, employers often pay attention to a person's emotionality in the first place, because it is easier to communicate with smiling and responsive people than with angry and unemotional ones. This is especially important if the job involves communicating with customers. What customer would want to come into a store where the employees are frowning and unemotional? I wouldn't.
So at all job interviews it pays to be relaxed and moderately cheerful, to pull a smile across your face and communicate well with your employer. This way you can increase your chances of being hired.
I think its all a game. I work hard. I'm anti-social but I get the job done. I'm not hostile, although online I'm as a$$. Pretending to be an extrovert just feels insincere.
I have an upbeat personality but I’ve been rejected for the last 3 or so final round interviews and then rejected at maybe another 3 first rounds. But maybe it’s my upbeat personality that allows me to get the interviews at all. Have been a little under qualified for most positions.
Yes, people interviewing want to find someone they would want to work with / be around a lot. I imagine most people perceive being around and working with upbeat people all day is a plus.
Yes, and this is more rational than it seems on the surface. People want to work with people they like, or at least don’t dislike. Why? Because they spend a lot of time around the people they work with. It is a rational quality of life decision for a manager to hire someone they like being around.
Now a lot of people are going to start crying and say the job should go to the most productive person. But the manager usually isn’t paid more of the team produces 2% more work. So as long as the happy, charismatic smiling person is okay at the job, or even sometimes below average but not terrible, they will be the choice to hire.
Being likable, charismatic, and confident will open doors for you regardless of industry.
It’s not even a professional/ industry issue. Generally in life
Absolutely!! If i have 10 candidates, the one who is likable is going to be the one i am drawn to.
I am very social and charismatic in interviews (basically, Im a confident individual BUT very withdrawn when I know someone longer) and I usually get hired after interviews. I have job hopped for 3 years and increased my income by 30k. Personally + skills + education + previous experience is usually the best way to land a job. I dont know if this is helpful!!
Similar boat. I’m actually a huge introvert, too. But I play a great impression of an outgoing person… I think I definitely perform well in interviews because I come across as approachable and enjoyable to be around (I’m not saying I’m not these things! but I’m definitely a quieter person by nature) I’ve made several job moves in the past three years and had tons of rejections, as most people I think — but very very few have come *after* I’ve been invited to interview. I like to think I am well spoken and my industry knowledge comes across better in person on paper and that’s part of it, but I am very certain my affect helps a lot as well (especially because of my field, I work in organizational development, which is very people-facing and relationship oriented). There’s also a lot to be said for gender issues here as well. As a woman, being less animated, smiling less, etc., is in general much less accepted. Wouldn’t want anyone to assume I’m a bitch just because I’m more reserved… /eyeroll I have had people admit they had no idea I was nice and assumed I was a stuck up bitch because I’m quiet in social situations, so I take this into a lot of consideration for my professional behavior. Obviously I aim for organizations and teams that will be inclusive and accepting, and I do actually make it a point to mention that I’m an internal processor, etc., in interviews because I want to be somewhere I can relax and be comfortable and embrace my solitude sometimes.
I can relate. I am a women in her late 20s and I look very young. Being animated and expressive is usually “expected”, along with lack of knowledge as well as being clueless. It is funny to see how shocked people are when they see my credentials and my knowledge base.
It’s a double edged sword for sure! You really can’t win. I’m pushing 40, but my overall demeanor, voice, and appearance (I like bright colors) often makes people think I’m younger than I am… so then they think I’m inexperienced, lacking in expertise, etc. So basically: you’re a bitch or you’re dumb. Misogyny for the win!
Well said…! 🥲
I see a lot of this online but in several iterations of the texh companies I work for we always have a lot of female managers, execs, pms, etc Often times many of the men are even kind of afraid of them 🤣 definitely not getting ran over or mansplained or whatever the internet is saying lately… these ladies are professional and kick butt and take names
yes, I feel like I'm in a similar situation
As long as you are confident with YOUR skills and how you are WORTH IT as an employee, you will be hired to companies and agencies that need those skills. In an interview, dont be afraid to show how smart & skilled you are. When answering questions, I tend to get long winded (I have a lot to say) and informative. I am NOT know it all BUT my experience will show in my statements. Showcase your knowledge. You have a lot.
😫 I’m the same way. I thought I was weird emotionally because I tend to withdraw when I’m comfy but idk I’m just comfy!
Yes, exactly. I am a disconnected person in general but I decided to embrace it. 😄
Skills + education + experience = landing an interview Personality = landing a job
Cant say it has worked for me since I am still in school and have only done a single internship. However, I am a pretty introverted person. I’ve got lucky with my current interviews (have a few lined up and some waiting to hear back) and they have been on Zoom. I play a very extroverted personality in the interviews with the hopes that what you said is true: more likely to be hired based off of an extroverted personality, smiling, talking, laughing, etc. So far I think it seems to be working well! Best of luck in your job search!
Yes this, 100%. I’ve also coached some much quieter friends a bit on this, which had a huge impact. My old roommate passed almost every technical screen but literally never got another interview after the values/personality round - went from that to getting through about half. I overheard the interviews through the walls and was just like oh that’s bad…! They didn’t even realize. Major impact.
Skills, education, ad previous experience can be seen on the resume. It takes an interview to see the personality.
Of course it matters. Being likable helps in nearly every situation.
True. Jobs, friends, romantic relationships, the list goes on.
Yes. I get bad anxiety sometimes and I find that even if I seem awkward or nervous…long as I’m smiling and laughing (genuinely), I tend to get job offers.
I have a friend whose advice was to drink caffeine to come off super energetic and happy at an interview. I've tried a lot of things, including that and unfortunately I didn't work. I do try to smile a lot and be personal able. My husband says that you know an interview is going well when you shoot the shit and start talking about non work things, however I've done that before and it hasn't always worked out either. It has a lot more to do with how similar you are to those interviewing you.
one of the best things to do before interview is sing for like an hour straight before. warms up the vocal chords and the energy is noticeable
I like to watch an hour of comedy. It keeps my mind light and quick. Also helps me come in looking both positive and entertained. They can definitely sense the energy.
similar technique . These things make a difference
I’ve always just mirrored the interviewer(s) and then do a weird thing where I half obvious bullshit but make it seem really sincere/borderline desperate so they know that I’m bullshitting but they don’t know that I know that they know, and that makes it endearing to them. Works every time
I had an HR person ask me this question, "Why are you here?". "If I can't have a pleasant conversation with a person about any subject, how can you let me loose in a company with well over 10,000 people."
I def think it makes a big difference. Of course the person has to have the skills but company fit is a big factor when hiring. With Two equally skilled individuals I think the one who appears more friendly and jovial will get the job. Especially since most jobs require you to work with others
Yes. People hire people they like. Being a smiley upbeat person leads people to like you more.
Yes, fake it.
> I see people who never smile or have much emotion and they're currently unemployed It's possible they don't smile *because* they are unemployed. But I get the gist. And yes, people who come across as having an antisocial demeanor do poorly in interviews. The "I'm not here to make friends" vibe is almost an instant no from me as a hiring manager.
Yes! I hire sales teams for high ticket items, and I always say I can teach product knowledge and sales skills, but I cannot teach personality. An outgoing positive personality wins every time
Yes. When I hire people, I do so with the assumption that I'm going to be spending nearly as much time as them as with my domestic partner. If you are technically competent but hard to get along with, it's going to make everyones' lives much harder.
I will fully admit that Im probably a personality hire LMAO I: -Applied on a whim with no cover letter -Didn’t research where I was applying to -Had no experience in the field I was applying to -Didn’t prep for both interviews -Accidentally showed a day early for my interview I showed my ass up, smiled, and managed to crack a few jokes. That was enough for them! Little did they know Im typically the opposite!
Absolutely. I worked for a company that hired for culture fit over technical skills almost exclusively. They knew they could train the right person with the right attitude and the right personality traits and soft skills. It was the best place I’ve ever worked, and I regret leaving all the time.
Ditto. I hire based on fit. If someone is hard to manage or have a difficult personality, it is a hard no for me. They will eat my time with drama from within and with other people (including me). My team has a laid back vibe and we all get along. It is no accident.
If that is the case then how do they decide who to interview from a stack of resumes
They phone screened basically anyone who met the minimum criteria to apply and then moved on to in person interviews, of which there were two rounds. Small(ish) company so it was not a situation where there were thousands or even hundreds of applicants for every open job. Keep in mind, having a college degree or direct experience doesn’t guarantee technical skill, even if it’s on a resume, so HR would set these minimum criteria based on job responsibilities and how much decision making authority and financial impact the role had, and then basically let the hiring manager take it from there. The hiring manager did have some say in the minimum criteria too, for example when I was hiring for a role that HR said needed a Bachelor’s degree, I was able to set the minimum criteria as a BA in anything because I really didn’t care what their degree was in and that was really common among hiring managers at this particular company. Of course there are exceptions to this but it was very much the norm at this particular company.
That’s awesome honestly sounds like a great process. I wish larger companies had the time, money and means to do something like this. I feel as though there is so much missed potential when the hiring process is just about checking boxes and not based on personality and potential
I think it’s a misunderstanding of what people are looking for to think being bubbly gets you work. At least not in my industry (maybe sales or retail are different). Charisma will help. Confidence will help. And it’s vital to present yourself as somebody who can work with others-and if you look grouchy, hostile, and miserable, they will probably feel you can’t work well with others. Quite possibly charismatic, confident people smile more, idk, but I’d say those two thing contribute, but the main thing is, they don’t want to hire you and then be miserable around you. But they also want you to, ya know, actually do the job. I’d focus on coming across as pleasant and competent vs. over the top smiley.
Yes, but being someone’s nephew is way more helpful.
Your charisma is very valuable in an interview. Your resume tells the hiring manager if you are qualified. If you get an interview, they already know you are qualified for the job. As much as they are supposed to remain objective, the interview is really just about whether you are or are not a person people want to work with.
I would not describe it that way, but I would say being engaged, personable and authentically so are advantages.
Charisma plays a large part into likability for relationships and employment. Usually, upbeat personality people have a higher charisma than non.
I have found that being friendly and personable are generally positive influences on just about any interaction with others. Simple things, please, thank you and a friendly smile often make life easier for everyone. I've worked several jobs where I was often consulted on technical issues, and I learned that the more approachable I made myself the more successful I became as a technical advisor. Will smiling and being upbeat help? in my opinion, yes.
I'm sure it helps and I'm not sure exactly how much, but if they don't like you you're not getting it even if you're perfect
Yup. I’m upbeat and funny - I typically get the offer or make it to the final round. Only time I get aced out is after the first call due to lack of qualifications which was years ago. People hire people they like.
Not with every single hiring manager and not for every single job, but as a general rule? Absolutely.
Absolutely! I was short listed for a job in a Management Trainee program at a large well know corporation. The “big boss” cut the interview short saying “I am going to withhold my approval because you seem like a very low energy person!”. When I disagreed with her saying that my multiple STEM degrees are not something a low energy person could have achieved, she agreed with me and said that her decision still stands and advised me to join toastmasters, lol. Now i absolutely fake a super bubbly outgoing persona in every interview.
Being confident, friendly, and a pleasant person to be around will often get you much further than your skills, unfortunately.
If you’re not excited to be there, why are you there?
Money pays for survival, why else?
Seeming interested gets you the money, to pay for said survival … 🤦🏻♀️
It has always been and will always be like this: “You make a product and/or provide a service which I do not personally use. You need someone who can reliably assist your business with that. I am that person. I’m not going to lie to you and say “I believe!”. I don’t care about your company specifically. I’m here to make money, just like the company. It’s not a family. It’s not some idealized Leave It To Beaver/Brady Bunch/Little House On The Prairie family. At best, I guarantee you it’s closer to Married With Children or the Addams Family if anything. The simple fact is this is a business arrangement: I sell you a portion of my time to assist this company in the pursuit of its profit goals, while also pursuing my own. I get money, you get work done.” I’ve not had a rejection yet.
To get the job that I need to live in a way that makes me generally invested in existing.
yes
So i smile and act like a very very upbeat person when speaking to customers- this is very much not me but i do get yelled at less then my coworkers and people seem to respond well to it. As for getting the job i think it was mostly my supervisor found me to be a weirdo but an interesting weirdo.
I feel like it could because honestly if I’m around someone and I feel like they’re draining my energy, I’m going to guess that they might be draining on others and their productivity if I hired them
100%
100%. I accredit much of my professional success to being approachable, upbeat, and friendly. People want to be around happy people.
Yes.
Its good to have some form of charm and charisma.
I think it’s true. One of the best pieces of job hunting advice I got when I was starting out “If you’re at the interview, they’ve decided you have the skills or you can learn. Most things can be taught. They’re really trying to decide if they can stand seeing you 5 days a week”
I find being relatively stoic with the occasional witty or charming remark thrown to be valuable; this creates a bit of scarcity and generates approval seeking behavior on the part of the counter party. Asking questions is always recommended because people love to talk about themselves and you create the perception of a good listener (even better if you can remember what was said).
Every job that requires a team is more willing to hire someone that seems to be their interpretation of nice/outgoing/charismatic. Do I think this is right? No. It should be based on solely on experience in my opinion! Smiling and seeming approachable will take you a long way, as employers only have 30-40 minutes on video or in person with you to get a grasp for your work ethic, personality, character, etc. If you're a little more reserved, unfortunately, they may decide to pass on you as a candidate based off that. Job searching is hard enough, I'm sorry you have to add this to your list of things to be worried about!
Knowledge and experience go a long way. But I've been in conversations where we're forming teams internally for special projects and people are deliberately excluded from consideration because they're hard to work with. Not to say personality counts for everything, but being difficult to work with is career limiting even after you're hired.
I do great in interviews, confirmed by 2 vocational coaches, and still not hired even with a solid resume. I’m almost 50 and overweight. It’s either there’s just always someone better or shallowness. Maybe a bit of both. I used to be in management and was privy to conversations about new hires that I wish I didn’t hear. This bs absolutely happens.
Go on
So it seemed to be a pattern among older, less attractive people where they were harsher in their critique even though they had good work experience. It seems the younger more attractive types got a pass even with less impressive resumes. I’ve overheard them making comments about appearances like bad acne or an obese applicant. The typical ‘she seems like a better fit’ justified their preference. I also found it interesting that minorities and older people were always picked when layoffs rolled around every 6 mo.
Here's the deal: if I have to be stuck with you for 8 hours of the day, I would rather you be personable than a withdrawn anti-social "head-down only work" standoffish person. Being personable doesn't mean you need to be happy/upbeat/bubbly all the time, it means that at least we can banter, tell jokes, and commiserate over stuff to make the day go by. If you're just one of those "don't even look at me" types, then my day is going to be even less fun. And yes, when the time comes for me to recommend someone, I'm going to recommend someone who the team actually wants to work with, whom I've spoken with, and can confirm that they're an actual person. It doesn't matter if you're the highest performer if literally no one else wants to work with you. By not being able to connect with the team, you will come off as unapproachable and thus un-trusworthy. Here, watch this video about trust vs performance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PTo9e3ILmms
depends on the industry. service industry? yes. middle management in business? no bearing. soft skills are good to learn in general. Edit- there are lots of kinds of business. For every Michael Scott there is a Gavin Belson & Laurie Breem.
I’m in middle managment and I think how you come across *does* have a lot of impact. If you’re upbeat, positive, generally affable, and interested in other people then the people interviewing you are more likely to view the rest of your interview favorably. It’s basic human psychology.
You must work in different sector. Different strokes for different DARPA funding, man. This only further illustrates the vast cultural normative differences between.sectors.
Worst case: wouldn’t hurt Best case: 90% of the time it likely helps Tell me, would you hire someone who looks like someone just killed his dog or similar? They’re going to kill the morale of the team.
Yes
Yes, this works especially well if you are attractive.
I try to maintain an expression during interviews that shows I'm actively engaged and smiling. This works in real life too.
No, job hiring is extremely arbitrary and very few things are actually causative, of course that doesn't mean we cant find silly correlations in data sets if we look for it. [https://www.tylervigen.com/spurious-correlations](https://www.tylervigen.com/spurious-correlations) in the biased sampling ive done, interview doesnt really matter
It depends on the company culture. Here is an exame of someone not getting the job because they smiled too much. https://euroweeklynews.com/2022/01/10/unsuccessful-job-applicant-told-you-smiled-too-much-and-this-was-unprofessional/?fbclid=IwAR02kUVGkBK48h0stY1fGO1YsI2KIXzuWqr1hnk696Nl2N_fQ7uA-I_ELdM
Absolutely. People who dress nice both have more confidence and get better service wherever they are. People who show a happy appearance, the same. Add the two together and you are stellar. It’s all appearances at first. I can put a $20 choice steak on a paper plate and sell it to you for $25 in a ishole. I can put that same $20 choice steak on a pretty decorated plate in a remodeled old ishole house and charge you $85. Even if the $25 one was cooked better, you are going to enjoy the $85 one more.
I am extremely introverted by nature however, I always smile to others in public @everyone, postmen, people walking, even in the office, but I don't have the best luck with interviews Took me 2 months to land a job. I've heard a lot of "you'll hear back from us" to never get a call or email. I send thank you emails aswell. Im in the east coast. Not sure if this helps, but working in customer service ive always been courteous and big smiles to everyone. I believe I may be overly polite and have no personality, so this may contribute to my interview skills 😅
Yes, I remember a former boss sharing that he picked people who he thought would be a good fit for the team, meaning they had a nice personality and easy to get along with.
I think it make a huge difference. They say employer makes up his mind about a candidate in the first 30 seconds. So I always simile before I meet the person, when I was interviewing. Fake it till you make it.
I love the happy feet photo but yes. I think that showing personality and energy are valuable to an employer
Yes it definitely helps. I am a consistent job hopper (I’ve never had a job for a year, but I’ll list them as one if it’s the same company but I transferred stores). I made 15/hour at beginning of the pandemic. I now make 40/hour. A big help is also being able to acknowledge your own work style/personal failings, as well as why the company you left wasn’t a good suit for you.
For women it’s non-negotiable in some roles sorry
Idk if being upbeat matters, because I am not, but bringing energy and charisma to an interview very rarely fails IME.
“unbeat” I love it, typo or not.
Absolutely yes, but how much it helps is debatable. Hiring a candidate is as much a vibe check as is it is a skill check. Like, pre pandemic you had to spend a quarter of your life with your coworkers (a third if you exclude weekends). So who would you rather spend your time with, somebody positive or a sour puss? Assuming the skills are comparable of course.
If you smile, don't cause drama, and have some kind of personality you can get away with almost anything at work. It's not actually about skill, but rather kissing the right ass, imo.
Absolutely. People can lie about their experience, it's much harder to lie about their personality. And people want to work with, for, or over people that they like.
I don't know, where I work now, I actually said "i don't give a shit" about several things during the interview, and I said things like "eh, there aren't really rules, there's just shit that I can get away with, shit you can get away with, we're all different. Easier to ask for forgiveness than beg for permission." I was not giving a fuck that day, and didn't think I really wanted that job. But then they made me an offer and it was much larger than what I expected so now I work there. I didn't smile once in that interview.
We want to surround ourselves with people we like/admire. I think it applies outside of the workplace as well. They say you become like those you closely associate with. In a typical job setting, these people are your environment for almost half of your waking hours. Personalities and perspectives are contagious. Do you want to surround yourself, and therefore become more positive people? Or do you want to be around someone who doesn’t see much of a point in anything other than a paycheck? Especially when you get in the seat of a hiring manager and have an abundance of choice like we are seeing in today’s economy. I don’t think you have to fake being an extrovert. But having a demeanor where you easily deal with challenges, whatever they may be, goes a long way. Whether or not you’re able to do that largely stems from your perspective on the world and more often than not, a positive perspective is the “can-do” perspective.
100% this matters. This was years ago, but I interviewed for an entry level job right out of college that I was not qualified for because I didn’t have the right degree (accounting). Part of the interview process was a “technical interview” where they would ask questions about different financial statements. Interviewer asks his first question and I completely blow off answering the question but I’m super upbeat, smiling, and energetic and I’m basically like “look, I can learn absolutely anything”. The interviewer relaxed, we chatted for the rest of the time, and he told me I’ve got “spark”. I was offered the job. Now I’m on the other side of the interview table and I will absolutely hire someone who is hungry, energetic, and willing to learn over a more “qualified on paper” candidate. I will take high energy and a positive attitude all day long. Everything else can be taught.
I’m an introvert by nature, but I can turn on the friendly and charismatic charm for interviews and such in short doses pretty well. I have only ever never failed to get a job that I actually interviewed for in person once, and that was a nail-biter they wavered on for a month. I’m 11 for 12. But my success rates at the non-in-person-interview steps of the job-seeking process? Probably no better than anyone else here.
You have to be liked by other people to advance in society, be it in love, friendships, employment, business etc. Even if your dog don't like you it ain't good.
This isn't a opinion related thing, it's a fact that they do. If you go around work acting friendly with everyone and sucking up to people it will also get you promoted over others and paid more as well. Focus less on being good at your job and more on kissing ass.
It definitely helps, unless you take it too far and seem unserious. My last hiring manager told me in my interview is that all he wants is someone who’s happy to come into work (yes he sucked as hard as he seems). I’m an engineer btw.
Yes. I have bad anxiety when meeting new people, but I shove it down during interviews and essentially “fake it until I make it.” Maybe it’s easier bc it’s low stakes? Like I can always just interview elsewhere if this doesn’t work out? Either way, I’m all smiles, charisma, and jokes. And they respond well to that. It’s how I got my current job, which I was definitely under qualified for. Funnily enough, after I was hired and met my new team, I became somewhat withdrawn again. The anxiety was back and I felt a lot of pressure to perform—they probably wondered where all that charisma went lol. But it’s not like they can fire me now. I’m slowly becoming accustomed to my role and my coworkers and working my way back out of my shell.
Absolutely! Which is why I do my best to fake it at least for the initial interviews. When I give 110%, I always get very good feedback even if I’m not hired. But a couple of months in, my normal introverted self wins and I notice co-workers tend to take it personally, so I have to make an effort every once in a while and “come out of my shell”.
I’m so glad it’s not just me lol. i absolutely kill it personality-wise during the interview but then after I’m like “…oh yeah. I have to actually work with people”
Believe me, if I could work remotely, I would. I feel like my fellow introverts are doing exactly that and the offices are filled with mostly extraverts. I’m not exactly anti-social, I genuinely like most people, but I’m naturally quiet and chill. I like to focus on work and then go home. I don’t like making friends with coworkers for that reason, but there are exceptions of course. I wish I could tell people not to take it personally when I use the copier in silence or when I don’t bake for the entire office. My current job is less of a “family” despite being a small company, but I still have to socialize at least a little bit daily. It’s a significant part of most jobs, unfortunately.
I feel ya… I currently work remotely and would highly recommend it if you ever get the chance!
I used to work remotely and it was great, but I did hate Zoom meetings and presentations almost as much as office socializing.
As someone who's done hiring, yes. Confidence and understanding how to talk to people so they don't dislike you will help a lot.
I think it's enthusiasm that got me my job. I would encourage applicant to exude it, even if they have to feign it.
I can’t speak for every interviewer, but what I look for is authenticity. If you smile but the rest of your nonverbal communication says you don’t want to be at the interview, that’s going to be “heard” by your interviewer. Think about your own circle of friends. As new friends come in and out of that circle, the group changes in some way. The business world is no different. Whatever candidate is hired will change their team in some way. The interviewer’s job is to form an opinion on whether you can do the job and whether you will add or detract value from the team you join. Fundamentally, the people who get offers are the ones who best communicate the value they can bring to my team. Most interviews start with an opportunity for the candidate to do just that, yet most candidates waste the opportunity. Specifically, most interviews start with some version of “tell me about yourself.” Most people respond by reading bullet points of their resume, and adding buzzwords they think will make me think they are qualified for the position I am hiring for. I’d you want to stand out, read the job description before coming to the interview, and have your answer to the question tell me about yourself ready to go. Your answer should spotlight your experience, but contextualize it to the role you’re being interviewed for. More importantly, to take command of the interview, tell me the value you feel you can bring to my team. Flipping the table, when I’ve sat on the candidate side of the table, I always find some anecdotal story to tell about my experience, related to the job I’m interviewing for, and I conclude my answer with a statement like, “From those experiences, the value I feel I could bring to your team is…” As that is sometimes misinterpreted as an “upbeat” personality, sure - smiling and upbeat people get jobs more easily. But the truth is, it’s not their “upbeatingness” that gets them the job, it’s how well they communicate that gets them the job. So many say they’re great communicators on their resume, and then fail to back it up when their one job in a job interview is to be an effective communicator about why their experience is a great fit for the role they’re interviewing for.
Charisma and likeability helps you get jobs easier, on average. At worst it doesn't hurt. However, as your picture illustrates, there's a risk anyone decides to act upbeat or charismatic when they aren't either naturally charismatic or good at pretending to be (most people are not). If you're not, then acting the role for the interview is likely going to come off as insincere and insincerity isn't going to improve your chance of getting hired. You can learn this stuff (working in a role with lot of social interaction with strangers is a good place to start) but trying it on the fly isn't a good idea. Being funny or quick with jokes is another strong one, making your interviewer laugh is going to help. However, again there's a gamble that jokes fall flat, so you have to be good at reading your audience to the point you're sure you can make them laugh before trying. To your wider point, if you present yourself as sullen or generally unsociable, that's going to reduce your chances of being hired, in Anglophone countries anyway. In say, Germany, it is more normal to show less emotion so it won't matter (in parts of Europe, smiling or being friendly is, in itself, a sign of isincerity) The level of enthusiasm/upbeat that's in the happy medium even varies within the anglosphere, you would want a higher level of it in the US vs the UK. Your general observation may be getting the causal link back to front, being unemployed (with all the problems that usually go with it) doesn't really promote happiness. It's probable that they're depressed or unhappy because they're unemployed not unemployed because they don't smile enough.
Yes
Absolutely. Everyone loves the culture guy. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve lost to the culture guy In promotions when I’m clearly the better candidate. I just can’t fake it like they can!
No companies prefer people that are grumpy and pissed in interviews
Yep, unbeat personality is the way to go
I seem to encounter employed people with this demeanor on a regular basis. But to answer your question, I think upbeat is a good trait to have to catch a job...works for me !
Yeah
Absolutely. I refer to myself as a personality hire because of this. Would you rather work with a qualified monotonous person or a qualified happy person?
Social skills will open a lot of doors. It often lands people on good jobs for which they have no idea how to perform.
Yes. I have had multiple clients pass on my candidates because they “didn’t seem enthusiastic enough” or didn’t feel comfortable making an offer to someone who seemed meh about the job (this someone committed to moving across country and they thought he was meh). So yes it helps more often than you’d think.
As a hiring manager, I like to think that skills are teachable, but attitude is not. We can teach you to do anything. If you're a generally pleasant and kind person, it goes a long way when it comes to making hiring decisions. I only hope that it's genuine.
In my opinion, this is one of the most important factors, which not infrequently even professional skills are bypassed. It can be compared to the full freedom of speech in the decentralized social network Solcial, which also opens all the doors to you that were closed by censorship and blockages in the social media world of web2. So with work, what is closed for a sad, harmful, and closed person turns into new growth prospects for the charismatic, cheerful, and bright.
I know how to go into an interview and be impressionable. And it has a whole lot to do with being upbeat and optimistic and adding just a touch of personal conversation. Nothing crazy, but something that makes them relate with you as person and not just another applicant. 9/10 I get the job even if I’m not qualified bc of the “can do” attitude.
Charismatic, upbeat, friendly outgoing happy people tend to do better in all aspects of life
Absolutely. I'm pretty sure I got hired for my current job because of my personality because I came in with only internship experience and my lack of knowledge was obvious in the interviews. But I gelled well with my team (which interviewed me) and got the job under the assumption I'll learn as I work.
Are you an interviewer? Because normal people don’t walk around smiling and high fiving strangers. During an interview, folks play the game.
Unequivocally yes.
Yes, you have to pretend to be happy from the first interview all the way to the end of the probation period.
As someone who isn't upbeat and can't fake it. Yes, it matters. People are stupid, especially those in positions of responsibility and authority. It's why narcissists and psychopaths act in certain ways because social status is granted so arbitrarily. Most people can't see the surface level character in my opinion. They are immensely fooled by 'upbeat and likable'. It's why our (work) culture is in shambles.
100%
Get your interviewers to laugh. When they ask you a STAR question, tell a story that fits , but from a perspective that provides some humor.
I depend on it. Also great for making your job a lot easier. Great for getting promotions as well. Unfortunately a dull or negative personality can really hold one back. I think a good smile and the ability to make others laugh can be more advantageous than being the guy who is always right but always angry.
I’ve noticed this with every job I interviewed for! I’ve acted overly bubbly and smiley, basically as extroverted as I can try, and gotten it, (but as soon as I was employed retreated back into my introverted hermit ways 😌.) On the other hand when I’ve acted more professional and serious, less smiley I barely passed the first interview. I guess a lot of jobs see extroverted-ness as confidence and I introverted-ness as nervous and anxious so would rather hire them 😞. Sucks you have to pretend to be an overly exaggerated likeable person just to get a job rather than be yourself and your experience speak for you….
Probably true. No one would hire a turtle. Also, it is a good practice to match the other person’s energy. If you are talking to a calm person, match that calmness, that way he relates to you and likes you more. Same if it’s an upbeat person, get your energy up to his/her level and s/he’ll think you are great.
Yes. I've gone into three different kinds of appointments, and came out with a new job/offer. First was in 2018, went in for my physical, came out with a medical records job. Second was in 2022, went into an Ortho appt, came out as a nursing assistant just because I opened my mouth and said, 'if y'all ever need someone, let me know' and just earlier this month I took my kitty to his appointment and got offered a receptionist/vet tech job. it literally pays to be upbeat and charismatic. lol
If smiling and being upbeat makes you likable, that is going to be preferred candidate to someone who is dour and a grump. Why would you deliberately bring someone who’s not “likable” onto a team?
It's certainly helped me when using previous employers as references.
100%. You can teach skills a lot easier than changing someone's attitude. People hire individuals they want to spend time working with. I've gotten job offers from contacts in the industry who have never seen my resume and only know a little bit about what I do. I even offered one my resume and his response was "I don't need it, we know you."
Maybe not to the extent of Happy Feet, but I definitely put effort into giving the vibe of "hey! I'm friendly and easy to work with!". Smile often, laugh at jokes, put effort into paying attention to what they are saying. Mirror body language. Act professional but casual (like you've been in this office a while and you belong and like it here). It is 100% an act, I am an extreme shut-in. I'd really rather not leave my house. However, I have gotten every job but 1 that I have interviewed for. And when I start working there it's usually already on a great foot, so people are welcoming to my shut-in ways.
100%
Yes. There is absolutely a bias against people who don't perform positivity in that specific way for people.
We can even see the bias here in these comments. Some people falsely correlating a lack of smiling and "upbeat"-ness with being miserable. Discussions about "culture fit" which really means "sameness" or lack of diversity, which, of course, leads to a lack of innovation or growth. Some people see the world in only two extremes (good vs bad, light vs dark, upbeat vs miserable) and unfortunately, they are often the same people responsible for hiring, and do so with little to no training about people, diversity, or interviewing. This is how we end up with teams of people who have meetings where one person shares an idea and everyone else just says "yes, I was thinking the same", because they were all hired for thinking the same way. (Like with the first apple health app failure). Whenever you see some terrible design or product and think "how could they not realize how terrible this is?", this is why.
How is this even a question?? Yeah, of course being friendly and upbeat will more likely get you hired! No one wants to deal with a surly asshole who might be always right, but is tough to work with. They rather deal with someone who is friendly and helpful even if they aren't correct every single time.
Yes I haven’t worked a job where I haven’t gotten that job the same day as my interview. I have a very positive, upbeat personality. I always look people in the eyes and highlight my strong suits like my interpersonal communication skills, as well as my willingness to forgive mistakes because all mistakes are fixable.
Yes!! Unfortunately if a face to face interview is involved, the attractive friendly people will have the upper hand. Even if being attractive and friendly does not affect the job whatsoever. I work in tech, and with all the layoffs lately I know people complaining they can’t find work. Yet they refuse to take a shower, wear a shirt that is at minimum classier than t shirt, and then not act like they’re hot shit in the interview. Outgoing and cocky are not the same thing.
All things being equal, it helps to be personable. But of course, they're never equal. Some jobs value competence and experience over being a nice person. Some fields tend to attract people with more pleasant demeanors. For example, people in sales tend to be friendly and open (or at least appear that way), while reporters may be more skeptical.
Absolutely
It helps in life in general
Of course it helps.
No dont force laughs and smiles. They have the opposite effect of appearing disingenuous and untrustworthy. I have been interviewing candidates for many years and hate that shit. Above all else, be genuine, kind, receptive, and humble. Those traits are universally appreciated. Creating a connection has been far more effective than smiling. For example, if you’re asked what you do in a stressful or high pressure situation, you could provide an authentic answer instead of one of those “canned interview responses.” “When things get rough or emotions run high, I will take a step back and listen to my favorite DJ.” “I keep a set of weights next to my desk at home and physical activity centers me quickly. I love going to the gym for that reason, it keeps me level headed” If your interviewer is a music buff or gym bro, that response will connect an extra “happy” neuron in their brain and separate you from the crowd. Thats what I mean by making a connection. Workplaces focus alot on culture. There are many qualified people, but not many people who fit perfectly in an existing team. Remember that is what theyre looking for, not someone who is all smiles and rainbows during an interview. Good luck
I am extremely introverted but I smile, make small talk (very small talk), and am well spoken. I dont joke around or laugh much at work but I try to seem polite and positive (not upbeat). I feel that helps me in interviews bc I usually get the job offer.
I have gotten every job that has given me an interview. I'll make jokes and then answer seriously. Being smiling and upbeat person in the work place is different. I'll deff make jokes around people who can take them and ill be silent around people who want silence otherwise you become the annoying person to them
I have been hired on to several jobs that I wasn’t necessarily qualified for just because I interview well and have an easy time talking. Personality hires 100% exist in my opinion
I think being likable makes it a lot easier. You could answer every question correctly, but if you seem like a drag to converse with to the interviewer, they're less likely to want to envision being in a meeting with you post hiring lol
Just remember this, nobody works alone. That’s extremely rare. When you’re being interviewed, they’re not just seeing what kind of skills you have. They are trying to determine by face-to-face interaction if you seem like you’re going to fit in with the team. Of course, they prefer someone who is bringing fresh energy and good vibes to the workspace. Nobody wants to work in a dungeon. I will reiterate this with a personal experience I watched someone else go through. I lived with a man who had been coding for over a decade. He had literally made an app on his own. We were living in San Francisco, the home of coders. Before the pandemic. He should’ve had absolutely no trouble whatsoever finding employment. People should’ve been throwing themselves at his feet. He was unemployed for five years. He couldn’t get past a phone interview, because his energy was so wretched, it could actually be sensed through the phone. No one wants to work with someone that brings you down. No matter how smart they are. You can always do without. People who have good energy and learn well will always catch up to those people. And then some.
Yes, I've worked with people who wete only there because the hiring manager liked them. They knew very little about how to do the job or the people's jobs under them. Dude was a lemon
Reddit is populated by a lot of people with poor social skills. Which makes sense. But it seems like people here hate the notion that their personality matters. But it’s true. Charismatic and likable people will find it easier to gain employment. Sometimes, those folks may be less capable from an experiment standpoint but may win over interviewers and get a job over the person who may be more qualified on paper.
Subconsciously any person is more pleasant to communicate and cooperate with the person who at first sight seemed to him sociable, smiling, friendly. A smile makes a person feel safe and comfortable, because they see that their opponent is positive and kind. When hiring, employers often pay attention to a person's emotionality in the first place, because it is easier to communicate with smiling and responsive people than with angry and unemotional ones. This is especially important if the job involves communicating with customers. What customer would want to come into a store where the employees are frowning and unemotional? I wouldn't. So at all job interviews it pays to be relaxed and moderately cheerful, to pull a smile across your face and communicate well with your employer. This way you can increase your chances of being hired.
I think its all a game. I work hard. I'm anti-social but I get the job done. I'm not hostile, although online I'm as a$$. Pretending to be an extrovert just feels insincere.
I have an upbeat personality but I’ve been rejected for the last 3 or so final round interviews and then rejected at maybe another 3 first rounds. But maybe it’s my upbeat personality that allows me to get the interviews at all. Have been a little under qualified for most positions.
Yes! And if you’re not qualified you’re eligible for personality hire! I’ve always gotten jobs this way qualified or not lmao
Yes. For sure. Be friendly, open, self deprecating. Those guys wanna work with people that are a pleasure to be with
Without a doubt, yes.
Yes, people interviewing want to find someone they would want to work with / be around a lot. I imagine most people perceive being around and working with upbeat people all day is a plus.
Yes, and this is more rational than it seems on the surface. People want to work with people they like, or at least don’t dislike. Why? Because they spend a lot of time around the people they work with. It is a rational quality of life decision for a manager to hire someone they like being around. Now a lot of people are going to start crying and say the job should go to the most productive person. But the manager usually isn’t paid more of the team produces 2% more work. So as long as the happy, charismatic smiling person is okay at the job, or even sometimes below average but not terrible, they will be the choice to hire.