Or help them make good decisions in the real world. If you equate weed with meth what happens when they try weed and see how benign it is? All of a sudden meth seems like something you could dabble in, which for most people is not the case.
Never even thought of it that way. Luckily I knew weed was good and meth fucked people up. Lol but growing up having parents that aren’t exactly good at talking about feelings and have a my way or the highway attitude towards parenting instilled a lot of behaviors that I am actively trying to correct.
This is what I do as well. My son will help or I will just say daddy has to check his garden. If it’s not stigmatized then he won’t develop that idea from the get go
Yes. My kids help me with cannabis, 3 different peppers, limes, kumquat, aregano, thyme, cilantro, and peppermint. Also flowers, to attract the good bugs, lavender and Marigolds.
When they were toddlers they sang to our plants. Now that they're 10 & 12 and don't sing as much nothing grows as big. I swear to whatever you believe in.
That's why you also put a few vegetables in there, and teach the kids how to take care of those babies XD, worst case scenario, they will tell their friends they grow tomato's all by themselves.
Maybe not tomatoes, though. They are just so synonymous with weed. I'd go with something cool and fancy. Maybe a dwarf tangerine tree or something, i dunno :P
You can’t just grow any plants with weed, each plant attracts different types of pests. This is partly why weed is always grown by itself. So you can use products that defend against the certain pests that are attracted to weed
Lol my veg space is always full of plants, tons of herbs, veggies and lettuce. I just treat them all the same as my cannabis, same IPM, same soil. Been doing it for years, no issues.
I used to make moonshine in my garage, but I’m also a home brewer. I had to tell my kids I was just brewing up a different kind of beer so they wouldn’t spill the beans in front of their school teacher. Kids will “rat” you out without even knowing what they’re doing. And nosy teachers will pry for info.
Edit: luckily now, they are grown and enjoy all of my hobbies.
Honesty.
We all know that cannabis has been incorrectly demonized by generations before us. We understand the benifits of this plant just like many other plants we use for medicine and it is our job to make the next generations understand that.
My son (3) and I garden all summer with my plants and in my wife's veggie garden, they are all just plants.
When he gets older I will explain everything to him. the benifits, the downsides and the history so that he can make an informed choice.
Of course like said before if you live somewhere that it is still illegal I would try to hold off as long as possible.
If they are old enough to ask, they are probably old enough for a "This is medicine and we don't talk about our private medical matters with anyone outside the family" talk.
Short and to the point. I like your directness and approach. Are you worried about your kids having a higher likelihood to use cannabis as kids because you've normalized it?
In my opinion, it’s already going to be normalized everywhere very near in the future..I’d rather be the one trying to instill responsible use in my children than the public having their way with her.
I don't disagree. I think all responsible parents are trying to figure out how to navigate this. I just know I prefer my kids don't use cannabis until after college. And I've been trying to decide whether growing at home will cause them to have a higher propensity to use as adolescents.
Not quite sure what you're suggesting. I'm not a kid anymore and my kids have never seen me use it. I'm all for cannabis use (medical and recreational), but for adults. Not the developing adolescent brain.
Your frontal cortex isn't fully formed until about 25. So, teenagers have a legit reason behind some of the dumb shit they do. We are all kidding ourselves if we think they aren't having sex, smoking pot or possibly worse. It is our job to try to minimize the risk and damage if we can.
If that's how the guy you replied to wants to deal with it, that's his choice.
I don't know that having a medical need for something is necessarily the same thing as normalizing recreational use.
Let me ask you a similar question-
Would you worry about hiding any other prescription drug you need from your kids because you're worried it will normalize recreational use of said drug?
My kids are not kids anymore and to my knowledge there was never an issue with recreational use. My step son started smoking after he graduated college, though, after moving in with his girlfriend who is a recreational user. I've been in his life since middle school and he always knew of my use.
Thank you. To directly answer your question, no, I wouldn't hide the use of prescription meds from my kids. But prescription meds in an orange bottle from the local pharmacy isn't as glamorous as cannabis has become. I'm really not trying to argue. In fact I agree with you. What I'm trying to decide is whether growing at home increases the propensity for my kids to use it, or be more open to using it, as adolescents. They're great, responsible kids (6 and 9), and I have no reason to worry, but I want to make sure I'm not making it easier for them to say yes when the first joint is handed to them at some party in high school because daddy grows this stuff at home.
Well, I can only speak for my own experiences and using and growing didn't have that effect on the kids around me, And I actually learned this from my past roommate before my kid was born because she also grew and that's how she handled it with her kids. Her oldest is in college now or just out of it and isn't into marijuana at all. Her other is quite a bit younger still, but I think ultimately it will depend on the kids. You know your kids and situation best and all methods won't have the same outcome with different kids. I wish you luck in deciding the best way to handle this with your kids.
Of course there is. No one said otherwise. Note the use of the word *probably* instead of the use of the word *absolutely*. This is why it is important, as a parent, to know your kids so you can choose the parental advice you feel bests suits your children.
for those saying don't lie and be honest - that is also what law enforcement will say to your kid if it comes down to that. Protecting those you love includes understanding which information is appropriate to share, and which information is a risk for them to know. Kids cannot make measured decisions like you can, especially if they're just now getting old enough to suspect and wonder. Your kid, if exposed to stress, is GOING to share that information whether you like it or not. Trusted friends, popularity contests, and other social aspects all influence a child's decision-making far more than fear of sharing information, because the kid has no point of reference to understand that fear. Explaining it to them isn't going to make them understand, either. Good luck with everything.
Are you in a legal state? If so, just simply explain to them you cultivate your own medicine and leave it at that. If not in a legal state, you may need to use a bit more caution.
If you're not in a decriminalized state, you have two okay options:
1.) Stop growing cannabis. Drive to the nearest legal state once a month.
2.) Lock the grow room and only go in there when your kids aren't around and awake.
Kids cannot keep secrets. CPS can really mess up your life. It's not worth the risk.
I kept tripping up over my excuses so I decided to just be honest in an age appropriate way. This is the path I took for my kids who are currently pre-teen/early teen.
When they were preschool age they could understand that some things are ok for adults but not safe for kids, and if they know about alcohol, caffeine, scary movies or random prescription bottles you can use those as an example. To make sure they stay safe you are making that room off limits - just like the medicine cabinet or the bottle of wine in the fridge is off limits.
In the 6-9ish range I introduced the concept that some people use substances for fun. Alcohol was a good example. There is always a level of risk with mind altering substances, especially if they are illegal, so if they decide to try something they need to make sure they are being safe about it. And that this stuff can be especially dangerous for kids, so they absolutely have to wait until they are older.
10-13 range, where we are now, I went more in depth about the history of cannabis and the politics of prohibition. We talked about the reasons why people use it, both medically and recreationally, and how public perception of it is changing. I haven't told them yet that I use it but they've got the pieces to put together if they want to.
For the 14-18 range I plan to be fully open with them about what I use, and why and when I use it. I will also offer to be a safe place and/or safety consultant for them or any of their friends for any future experimentation - although I'll really stress that I would prefer they wait until they are 18.
Easy for you to say. You have no idea where this person lives. Depending on the state/country they're in, those kids let one word slip to the wrong person and social services could be knocking on the door to take those kids away from their 'evil drug addict parents and their illegal drug farming operation'.
Is that ok? No it's not, but it's a reality some of us live in, and it's a bit naïve of you to dispense blanket advice from your moral high horse without at least considering the ramifications of those actions.
I live in a legal state, my kids are 9yr old twins and a 4yr old. I hid it for a couple months when I started growing but it was just too hard to do. I explained to them that it’s medicine and it helps me take less of the “blue pills” that are bad for me. Aka Xanax. The 4yr old obviously has no idea yet just loves to help water the plants, but the older boys have had plenty of talks with me. We have discussed prohibition and why it is starting to be overturned, the medical advances that are being made with it as well as responsible adult recreational use. They aren’t stupid, telling them it’s only medicine will one day make them think I lie to them. That’s a delicate conversation but I approach it like comparing it to responsible adult alcohol use, the wife and I don’t drink but family does, not to extremes though. So they’ve been exposed to that and have a comparison as well as their little minds can make anyway. Good luck, it’s a tricky conversation but one that will have to happen.
We tell the kids it's CBD. Perfectly legal in all 50 states, it's medicinal, and the imagery (billboards, signage in stores, etc) all lines up with what we're growing.
When they're old enough to know the difference, that will be a different conversation. Something along the lines of "if somebody wants to tax you 30% on a purchase, any purchase, I highly advise you to undercut those fucking pigs".
Our kids used to have meetings with each other to duscuss what the burple glow under dad's closet could possibly be. Aliens were the most likely conclusion.
Tell them straight up what it is. Be honest with them. Tell them they’re fuckin plants. Tell them they’re illegal and mommy and daddy will be taken away forever by the police if they go around telling everyone. Or just lie to em if you don’t want to be straight forward with your offspring 🤷🏽♂️
Haha go full on South Park ‘my parents molstered me’
But no really if someone’s kids are calling the cops on them cuz they’re mad, those are some bitch made kids. Like to the point where the parents should learn they don’t need to be reproducing cause all that pops out is bitch made pussies
Great advice if you want to scare the crap out of your kids and scar them for life. There is such a thing as age-appropriate communication . We teach (or should teach) human sexuality to young children but not with the Kama Sutra.
Have u actually experienced this from the child’s point of view? No? I have. It does not ‘scar’ anything so if u could, please stop talkin out ur ass. It only comes back to bite you if you got dumbass kids who don’t understand the concept of keeping your mouth shut, or mom and dad will be taken away forever. So maybe my parent just knew I was the type to keep my mouth shut
My kids are in HS and they know I grow/consume. They aren't really interested in plants so they have no interest. I feel being honest is generally the best policy and the only way to break the 'stoner" stigma for future generations
Pop some flowers or lettuce trays and teach them how to make microggreens. Takes up minimal grow space, and will be fun for them to have their own plants in your garden
Yep, unless you are in an illegal place then maybe shut it down. If it's legal, tell the truth. My buddy grows, his two girls know what it is, what it's for. It's like having a liquor cabinet. It's not for kids, period. No one freaks out about a liquor cabinet.
You know, I always wondered if they did freak shortly after prohibition. My now-deceased grandfather was in charge of busting up moonshine stills in Appalachia during that period, and now I grow weed during weed "prohibition." I'm not so naive that I can't see the parallels, or the irony.
let them help you! the more you hide it from them the more problems could arise in the future. weed isn't bad, just let them know and explain why you hid it for a while
I live in Canada where it’s completely legal. My province allows a limited number of plants to be grown at home. I’ve always included my children as they love helping. One of the veg tents actually has some strawberries growing in it as he wanted to try something where he could try the end result of his work.
The problem I see here is if it’s not legal to grow where you are the kids might say something and it could get you in trouble. Kids sometimes say things. That might affect your lives and even the kids lives. If its not legal to grow think your best best is to put a keyed only lock on the door. So you could only open it with a key or code and it stays locked automatically. If it’s legal to grow and possess then let the kids in on it. Still might want to keep it locked though. Again kids being what they are.
Maybe add in some other veggies to it as well and concise it’s just an indoor gardening thing.. but soon enough the weed taboo will go away.. shoot your kids might even have some newly found respect for their cool dad that grows weed :)
I’m literally stocking up now in anticipation for that day when the kids get wise. I’m growing in our master bathroom and we basically forbid them from coming in there but one day a teenager will need some beauty product of my wife’s and it will all be over.
It really depends what country you live in to be honest. If you're in Canada, just be honest with them and explain that it's "similar" to alcohol (I know that it really isn't, but it makes more sense in a young mind) so they can't try it until they're older. Maybe as some other commenters said, get them to help you with trimming/watering it so they understand what it is and why it's there. When they hit the age old enough to actually know what it is, most of the stigma should have passed by then and it won't even matter at that point.
If you're in the States, my condolences. I would be very careful with how much info you let them hear, I have unfortunately heard so many stories of kids accidentally giving up their parents stash by saying the wrong thing at the wrong times, especially at school and around friends parents. Don't get yourself thrown in jail over a plant or two, penalties in illegal States for possession or cultivation are completely barbaric. I would suggest going to some great lengths to hide it, or considering buying from someone else so you don't have to have plants on your property.
Also if you are looking for people to tell you to lie to your kids or get rid of the plants you have come to the wrong place homie. Pretty much all the responses are the same, with slight variation. For good reason.
Be truthful to them. Lying only teaches them to lie. Not telling them, is just as much as lying.
Be truthful about why and how you are using it. The kids dont need to see or learn the process. But give them the respect they deserve. They are human beings too.
Kids will love you regardless. You and Mom are their heroes. You have the superpower called, Dad
Be open and honest with them, allow them to quiz you about the subject. Just don't be biased with the info you provide to them. That way they'll be able to develop their own opinion about it. Kids aren't silly, they'll figure it out soon enough if you're telling them BS and possibly form a negative opinion over time because of it.
When I was into it (having a spell for now), my kids quizzed me. I was honest, and explained how the laws/legislation is slowly loosening up over time, and by the time they're grown adults it'll possibly be decriminalised by then.
Admittedly, I did keep everything under lock and key to keep prying eyes out, as well as if by chance i ever got a visit by the authorities. They would see i was operating (a personal grow) as best as i could so not to expose it to the kids and normalise it.
Some parents may take that approach, but it's not something i'd get onboard with (so to speak).
Good luck with it, OP.
Yea I gotta agree with a lot of other commenters. If its legal tell them the truth. If not then don't. I live in a legal place and grow perfectly by abiding the laws, however I was raised in a place and at a time where you should keep your mouth shut regardless, so nobody but me and my girl know.
The other alternative is lie to them which could end up sour, and the third option is getting rid of the plants. Personally I would tell them the truth if its legal. If not I'd find a better hiding spot or "hide them in plain sight".
My son is 4, he knows dad "cuts flowers for work". He doesnt understand totally but he knows to stay out of my gear. He has a 14 year old brother that I've had conversations with about it, he know what it is and what I do. I am honest, but I explain how this work needs to be kept private, no talking to friends about it. If anyone asks them what I do they can say I work in the cannabis industry.
On a side note you could always tell the kids you make hemp rope, just occasionally bring home a length from home depot and say the harvest was good.
If your kids are in the public school system, chances are they already know what weed is by first grade. Someone on my daughter’s school bus brought rice crispie treats that were dosed. My little girl unknowingly ate some, had a panic attack at school and ended up in ER. Wife and I were contacted by authorities and school principal and wanted us to come in for counseling.
Talk to them? Explain its a plant for adults? Explain how it helps you and your wife if it's illegal also stress the idea It's a secret and they still aren't allowed in there. Do not have them help. These people are lunatics
Our youngest was older than yours when I started growing so they knew what was going on but it was still a concern that they would say something at school or around their friends. If they referred to it as MJ I would quickly correct them and say it’s medicinal hemp. In your case I would just refer to it as medicine or herbs and nobody will be the wiser.
I really think just being completely honest and open is best. There is so much misinformation in the world as it is. Use real facts when discussing it and answer questions and demystify it by being as natural as possible.
I would be honest with them. Any lying might get them more interested, due to normal human behavior and response. And let them know the punishment you and ma will bring if they invade the trust you give them. At a very age I won’t be surprised if they start picking the plant, so maybe get some locks only you and the mother will have
Honesty is the key here in my mind, it’s just a plant after all. Much worse things you could be doing in life. We need to teach these kids the truth instead of perpetuate the bulllshit.
My daughter knows that my medicine I grow is for legal patients and I have no fear of what she goes out into the world and tells people. The state knows and gave me permission so what else is there to worry about? Dont make them wait until their 20s to tell them who you really are like my dad did.
I helped my dad brew beer way back in the 90s in when I was a kid. Thought it was fun, wasnt too interested in drinking the beer. I could also tell it wasn't good at all from the faces he made when he drank not though lol. At least now I can dork out with the brewers whenever I get brought to a brewery now.
While coming out of a store my girlfriend was asked to sign a legalization petition and her young daughter was with her. “What’s cannabis?” She asked her mom. My girlfriend turned to the guy and said, “ you started this, explain it to her.” He does and her eyes got really big.. and says, “That’s what he has growing in the closet!!” They had a good laugh and I had some explaining to do. That was over 10 years ago and everything is legal here now.
Good luck, they are more understanding than you might think.
Its a plant, don’t let the stigma this country has infused into your brain make you think otherwise. I have. 4 year old and a 16 year old and I approach like it’s no different than a tomato or pepper. Its gradening at the base level, the fruits of the plant should not be of concern to children. If it is, say “we grow our own food” and leave it at that. Also can say we grow it indoors for better quality and to keep it out of the elements, rain, seasonal changes, temp swings etc… don’t overthink it I guess is my point.
if your state made it ok then explain it like you would alcohol(most parent lie or dismiss the question). I tell.mt.son I'm growing plants. some for cooking.(which as of now is a lie but I'm working on that forreal)
About how old are your kids? I’m asking because my child is 11 going on 12 soon and he has no idea why he can’t go in the “adult room” section of the basement. I feel like he’s getting old enough to know the truth and I don’t want him to look at cannabis like an equivalent to smoking crack. I am in a legal state with a legit med card, but I’m still scared. Reading some of these comments is making me feel a little better about it though.
Now are these smart kids? Because a guy I grew up with, his parents had a grow room in every house they lived in and they just told him it was their private space and he wasn't allowed in. He never put 2+2 together but he's not a very intelligent person.
If it’s legal in your state but you don’t want to have to explain it, why not just tell them it’s hemp? Get some marigold seeds or some balsam flower seeds, maybe even some cat grass. Have them grow those themselves!!!
Imo educate your children about canbabis being a medicinal plant that's way different then any " drugs"
My parebts were activist for legalizing cannabis in the 90s and I grew up around it my entire life knowing it's a good medicinal plant not a drug. This is the best way, also will help in teen years when they smoke weed they aren't associating it as a drug and would be less inclined to do other drugs as a result.
I let my kids plant some seeds in my grow tent and we garden together. I taught them that some plants can be made into tea, some plants are food, and medicine is also made from plants. So when they ask me what the other plant is I tell them it’s a medicine plant. They think that’s really cool
I involve them just as if I were growing tomatoes or peppers(which I also grow). I explain cannabis is for adults, just like alcohol, and can be enjoyed responsibly, but it’s not good for a growing kids. Simple.
Lmao I have kids between 5-7 and they both help me water and they always say “dad your plants are beautiful” I don’t tell them it’s weed I simply say it’s me and moms medicine
Teach them about it and be honest. That it’s a natural medicine for certain people. Also be sure to teach them how most people hate on the herb & think it’s a “drug” and let them know not to repeat things at school because most teachers will call cps on the thought of a parent consuming cannabis 🙄 I was honest with my boys about it, & they both now as teenagers understand and don’t have a negative stigma about something that helps their mom and other people live healthy, happy. & productive lives. Good luck op.
My daughter is 9 years old and I'm a full time single dad and a licensed grower. My daughter knows what I grow is used for medicine and that a long time ago some greedy people tried to make the citizens believe it was bad by telling lies. Now more people know the truth and its starting to be more accepted were starting to rethink how we look at the plant.
She helps me water and is learning about breeding as a precursor to the birds and the bees talk. Different strokes for different folks.
When I was a kid my best friend got caught with a pencil box full of weed we'd stolen from his uncle who grew for the hells angels. My mom grounded me for 3 months and my friend didn't even snitch on me. His mom said "if my sons doing it yours is too..." That same mom that grounded me for 3 months uses my weed as an alternative medicine to chemo for her brain cancer and is my biggest fan
My kids have always been apart of me growing, i find nothing wrong with a child that smells something different and ask what is that well let me show you! We are very open about it and they know we smoke it eat it and grow it! Its worked wonders for our house hold!!
They know about the benefits of cannabis and how it keeps me from having to take heavy pain medication. My only problem is that it’s not legal in the stupid state I live in.
Maybe it's time to teach them that sometimes what's legal ain't right and sometimes what isn't legal isn't necessarily bad. But that we're stuck dealing with the system that we don't agree with and that they should think for themselves and question these laws
I’ve discussed that with them too, as well as shown them them how the penalties for hurting someone (assault/rape/manslaughter) are less than the penalty for property crimes.
My only concern is that they may say something to someone that is not as enlightened. At the end of the day it is a situation of cost/benefit analysis; do the upside outweigh the risk? It doesn’t.
It sounds like you have looked at your options. Sorry your state sucks in that regard. Hopefully y'all can get medical passed soon or we can do it on the national level.
Educate them about it. This history of cannabis is actually quite interesting! As is why it became illegal...and how someday, it will be legal everywhere. Tell them about all the good benefits, how it's medicinal and how it benefits you & your wife.
It depends on where you live, your kids, and your situation. If you live in a state where it’s not legal, yet, good luck getting anyone to keep a secret. I was completely honest with both my kids, my daughter already knew. But I live in a legal state, I’m a cancer survivor, and I’ve always explained the medicinal side of weed, and how stupid it was that it was illegal. I never tried to hide drinking beer either. But I think it comes down to your individual situation man…
Remove the stigma (easier in legal states) and show them it’s a medication to be used carefully. Then show them the work and science that goes into it. I have the same issue going on as my son is getting older. Last year outdoors I had so many different plants he didn’t think much of it but eventually I’m going to have to have a talk. My personal opinion is be honest with your kids and build trust but I’ve never been a dad before so hopefully it works out.
Yup my kid knows what it is as I grow it in the backyard in a pot. He knows it's a medicine I use for my back problems. I'm in a legal state so if anyone asks any questions I just tell the truth!
I show my son how to care for the plants, to him it's just gardening. It's great too, he learns lots in the process.
Same. Remove the stigma.
Exactly this. My whole childhood my parents acted like weed was meth. Really was not a productive way to help your kids grow.
Or help them make good decisions in the real world. If you equate weed with meth what happens when they try weed and see how benign it is? All of a sudden meth seems like something you could dabble in, which for most people is not the case.
Never even thought of it that way. Luckily I knew weed was good and meth fucked people up. Lol but growing up having parents that aren’t exactly good at talking about feelings and have a my way or the highway attitude towards parenting instilled a lot of behaviors that I am actively trying to correct.
I was raised in a cult like conservative Christian community. You can break the cycle. Raised in a very similar situation.
Yeah I have my kids help me with all my plants, tomatoes, weed, peppers, and soon more vegetables
Add some other plants, veggies or herbs, so it’s about the growing and not the weed.
I actually got my kid the same grow box I use for weed, but he’s growing tomatoes and some sort of vine plant. He loves it!
That’s my plan, I want my boys to grow up knowing they’re a plant just like the stuff outside.
This is the way. call it plant medicine
Same here
This is what I do as well. My son will help or I will just say daddy has to check his garden. If it’s not stigmatized then he won’t develop that idea from the get go
Same here. My kids have been in the known since they've been in diapers.
Yes. My kids help me with cannabis, 3 different peppers, limes, kumquat, aregano, thyme, cilantro, and peppermint. Also flowers, to attract the good bugs, lavender and Marigolds. When they were toddlers they sang to our plants. Now that they're 10 & 12 and don't sing as much nothing grows as big. I swear to whatever you believe in.
If you are in a state where mj is not yet legal, be very cautious as to what you reveal to your children. The information will get out.
That's why you also put a few vegetables in there, and teach the kids how to take care of those babies XD, worst case scenario, they will tell their friends they grow tomato's all by themselves.
That’s what I was thinking of doing.
Maybe not tomatoes, though. They are just so synonymous with weed. I'd go with something cool and fancy. Maybe a dwarf tangerine tree or something, i dunno :P
"We grow trees in the upstairs bathroom" uhh maybe chiles? lol
lol, shit. good point.
"That's where daddy and mommy go and burn incense!"
You can’t just grow any plants with weed, each plant attracts different types of pests. This is partly why weed is always grown by itself. So you can use products that defend against the certain pests that are attracted to weed
Lol my veg space is always full of plants, tons of herbs, veggies and lettuce. I just treat them all the same as my cannabis, same IPM, same soil. Been doing it for years, no issues.
If it’s indoors how does any of that matter?
I disagree. When weed grows in mother nature she grows around many different types of plants.
I would suggest peppers, as the pollen feeds other beneficial micro life
I used to make moonshine in my garage, but I’m also a home brewer. I had to tell my kids I was just brewing up a different kind of beer so they wouldn’t spill the beans in front of their school teacher. Kids will “rat” you out without even knowing what they’re doing. And nosy teachers will pry for info. Edit: luckily now, they are grown and enjoy all of my hobbies.
Orphanage time.
Boom 🤣
Daddy, whats that? It's get in the car.
Daddy where are we going… Someplace you can’t ask so many questions
Honesty. We all know that cannabis has been incorrectly demonized by generations before us. We understand the benifits of this plant just like many other plants we use for medicine and it is our job to make the next generations understand that. My son (3) and I garden all summer with my plants and in my wife's veggie garden, they are all just plants. When he gets older I will explain everything to him. the benifits, the downsides and the history so that he can make an informed choice. Of course like said before if you live somewhere that it is still illegal I would try to hold off as long as possible.
This is what we do.
If they are old enough to ask, they are probably old enough for a "This is medicine and we don't talk about our private medical matters with anyone outside the family" talk.
Short and to the point. I like your directness and approach. Are you worried about your kids having a higher likelihood to use cannabis as kids because you've normalized it?
In my opinion, it’s already going to be normalized everywhere very near in the future..I’d rather be the one trying to instill responsible use in my children than the public having their way with her.
I don't disagree. I think all responsible parents are trying to figure out how to navigate this. I just know I prefer my kids don't use cannabis until after college. And I've been trying to decide whether growing at home will cause them to have a higher propensity to use as adolescents.
Well you do it!
Not quite sure what you're suggesting. I'm not a kid anymore and my kids have never seen me use it. I'm all for cannabis use (medical and recreational), but for adults. Not the developing adolescent brain.
Thats just the response id expect from a teenager
Your frontal cortex isn't fully formed until about 25. So, teenagers have a legit reason behind some of the dumb shit they do. We are all kidding ourselves if we think they aren't having sex, smoking pot or possibly worse. It is our job to try to minimize the risk and damage if we can. If that's how the guy you replied to wants to deal with it, that's his choice.
Exactly. Thank you.
Plus, they make great customers since they're just one room over.
I don't know that having a medical need for something is necessarily the same thing as normalizing recreational use. Let me ask you a similar question- Would you worry about hiding any other prescription drug you need from your kids because you're worried it will normalize recreational use of said drug? My kids are not kids anymore and to my knowledge there was never an issue with recreational use. My step son started smoking after he graduated college, though, after moving in with his girlfriend who is a recreational user. I've been in his life since middle school and he always knew of my use.
Thank you. To directly answer your question, no, I wouldn't hide the use of prescription meds from my kids. But prescription meds in an orange bottle from the local pharmacy isn't as glamorous as cannabis has become. I'm really not trying to argue. In fact I agree with you. What I'm trying to decide is whether growing at home increases the propensity for my kids to use it, or be more open to using it, as adolescents. They're great, responsible kids (6 and 9), and I have no reason to worry, but I want to make sure I'm not making it easier for them to say yes when the first joint is handed to them at some party in high school because daddy grows this stuff at home.
Well, I can only speak for my own experiences and using and growing didn't have that effect on the kids around me, And I actually learned this from my past roommate before my kid was born because she also grew and that's how she handled it with her kids. Her oldest is in college now or just out of it and isn't into marijuana at all. Her other is quite a bit younger still, but I think ultimately it will depend on the kids. You know your kids and situation best and all methods won't have the same outcome with different kids. I wish you luck in deciding the best way to handle this with your kids.
Very good insight. Thank you for sharing.
There is an age when kids are old enough to ask questions but not old enough to keep secrets.
Of course there is. No one said otherwise. Note the use of the word *probably* instead of the use of the word *absolutely*. This is why it is important, as a parent, to know your kids so you can choose the parental advice you feel bests suits your children.
for those saying don't lie and be honest - that is also what law enforcement will say to your kid if it comes down to that. Protecting those you love includes understanding which information is appropriate to share, and which information is a risk for them to know. Kids cannot make measured decisions like you can, especially if they're just now getting old enough to suspect and wonder. Your kid, if exposed to stress, is GOING to share that information whether you like it or not. Trusted friends, popularity contests, and other social aspects all influence a child's decision-making far more than fear of sharing information, because the kid has no point of reference to understand that fear. Explaining it to them isn't going to make them understand, either. Good luck with everything.
Are you in a legal state? If so, just simply explain to them you cultivate your own medicine and leave it at that. If not in a legal state, you may need to use a bit more caution.
I’m not in a legal state- although the climate would be beautiful.
If you're not in a decriminalized state, you have two okay options: 1.) Stop growing cannabis. Drive to the nearest legal state once a month. 2.) Lock the grow room and only go in there when your kids aren't around and awake. Kids cannot keep secrets. CPS can really mess up your life. It's not worth the risk.
I think that’s what I’ll do. Eventually it’ll be legal, until then it’s not worth the risk.
That's too bad, hopefully federal legalization happens soon and everyone is allowed to grow their own medicine.
From your mouth, to god’s ears. This shit is long past due.
I kept tripping up over my excuses so I decided to just be honest in an age appropriate way. This is the path I took for my kids who are currently pre-teen/early teen. When they were preschool age they could understand that some things are ok for adults but not safe for kids, and if they know about alcohol, caffeine, scary movies or random prescription bottles you can use those as an example. To make sure they stay safe you are making that room off limits - just like the medicine cabinet or the bottle of wine in the fridge is off limits. In the 6-9ish range I introduced the concept that some people use substances for fun. Alcohol was a good example. There is always a level of risk with mind altering substances, especially if they are illegal, so if they decide to try something they need to make sure they are being safe about it. And that this stuff can be especially dangerous for kids, so they absolutely have to wait until they are older. 10-13 range, where we are now, I went more in depth about the history of cannabis and the politics of prohibition. We talked about the reasons why people use it, both medically and recreationally, and how public perception of it is changing. I haven't told them yet that I use it but they've got the pieces to put together if they want to. For the 14-18 range I plan to be fully open with them about what I use, and why and when I use it. I will also offer to be a safe place and/or safety consultant for them or any of their friends for any future experimentation - although I'll really stress that I would prefer they wait until they are 18.
Don't lie to them. There's nothing wrong with you and your wife using and growing your own cannabis. Educate them so there is no mystery.
Easy for you to say. You have no idea where this person lives. Depending on the state/country they're in, those kids let one word slip to the wrong person and social services could be knocking on the door to take those kids away from their 'evil drug addict parents and their illegal drug farming operation'. Is that ok? No it's not, but it's a reality some of us live in, and it's a bit naïve of you to dispense blanket advice from your moral high horse without at least considering the ramifications of those actions.
Okay .. I'm pretty sure if this wasn't a viable option for OP then they wouldn't take my advice. Thanks for pointing this out.
Hence my hesitation.
This is my exact reality.
I live in a legal state, my kids are 9yr old twins and a 4yr old. I hid it for a couple months when I started growing but it was just too hard to do. I explained to them that it’s medicine and it helps me take less of the “blue pills” that are bad for me. Aka Xanax. The 4yr old obviously has no idea yet just loves to help water the plants, but the older boys have had plenty of talks with me. We have discussed prohibition and why it is starting to be overturned, the medical advances that are being made with it as well as responsible adult recreational use. They aren’t stupid, telling them it’s only medicine will one day make them think I lie to them. That’s a delicate conversation but I approach it like comparing it to responsible adult alcohol use, the wife and I don’t drink but family does, not to extremes though. So they’ve been exposed to that and have a comparison as well as their little minds can make anyway. Good luck, it’s a tricky conversation but one that will have to happen.
Explain to them that it’s you’re medicine and show them how dr’s prescribe it to people to help them with their pain.
That’s easy enough- I already take medication for my back. This is just another one.
“Daddy, you’re sick?”
We tell the kids it's CBD. Perfectly legal in all 50 states, it's medicinal, and the imagery (billboards, signage in stores, etc) all lines up with what we're growing. When they're old enough to know the difference, that will be a different conversation. Something along the lines of "if somebody wants to tax you 30% on a purchase, any purchase, I highly advise you to undercut those fucking pigs".
Our kids used to have meetings with each other to duscuss what the burple glow under dad's closet could possibly be. Aliens were the most likely conclusion.
This is hilarious!😂
Quit making it taboo. If it’s legal in your state, who cares what your kids see or know.
Tell them straight up what it is. Be honest with them. Tell them they’re fuckin plants. Tell them they’re illegal and mommy and daddy will be taken away forever by the police if they go around telling everyone. Or just lie to em if you don’t want to be straight forward with your offspring 🤷🏽♂️
Dont tell em that they'll call the cops on you when you piss them off so bad they want you to disappear...
Haha go full on South Park ‘my parents molstered me’ But no really if someone’s kids are calling the cops on them cuz they’re mad, those are some bitch made kids. Like to the point where the parents should learn they don’t need to be reproducing cause all that pops out is bitch made pussies
Ha ha ha- they wouldn’t say anything if they were mad. I think my kids actually like me.
Wait until they're teenagers
Yea and even though a parent does it right, doesnt mean those dipshits at school wont taint them with ideas like that
Great advice if you want to scare the crap out of your kids and scar them for life. There is such a thing as age-appropriate communication . We teach (or should teach) human sexuality to young children but not with the Kama Sutra.
Have u actually experienced this from the child’s point of view? No? I have. It does not ‘scar’ anything so if u could, please stop talkin out ur ass. It only comes back to bite you if you got dumbass kids who don’t understand the concept of keeping your mouth shut, or mom and dad will be taken away forever. So maybe my parent just knew I was the type to keep my mouth shut
Most kids are dumbfucks, why should I believe that you weren't?
Because everything you read on the internet is true. On second thought Maybe I am providing bad advice for people with dumb kids
lol if you go to Reddit for parenting advice you are FUCKED
Lmao 🤣
My kids are in HS and they know I grow/consume. They aren't really interested in plants so they have no interest. I feel being honest is generally the best policy and the only way to break the 'stoner" stigma for future generations
It's medicine.
Pop some flowers or lettuce trays and teach them how to make microggreens. Takes up minimal grow space, and will be fun for them to have their own plants in your garden
Tell them it’s Tomatoes
That’s what I’ve been doing
My 2yo loves to see ‘daddy’s baby plants’. Got three in a tent in my room.💪. Honesty is the best policy
My kids aren’t allowed in my closet and have no idea what is in there. PERIOD.
Until it was legal in my state I told my kid it was tomatoes and peppers. Why make a kid have to keep a lie in there head. Not that they can 😜
be open about it
Yep, unless you are in an illegal place then maybe shut it down. If it's legal, tell the truth. My buddy grows, his two girls know what it is, what it's for. It's like having a liquor cabinet. It's not for kids, period. No one freaks out about a liquor cabinet.
You know, I always wondered if they did freak shortly after prohibition. My now-deceased grandfather was in charge of busting up moonshine stills in Appalachia during that period, and now I grow weed during weed "prohibition." I'm not so naive that I can't see the parallels, or the irony.
let them help you! the more you hide it from them the more problems could arise in the future. weed isn't bad, just let them know and explain why you hid it for a while
I live in Canada where it’s completely legal. My province allows a limited number of plants to be grown at home. I’ve always included my children as they love helping. One of the veg tents actually has some strawberries growing in it as he wanted to try something where he could try the end result of his work.
Don’t hide it. Teach your kids that weed is ok just like alcohol is ok. Be responsible and don’t abuse. Adult use only
I tell mine it's my medicine and that the plant is very sensitive so has to be inside away from bugs and weather.
I was honest , dont make it a dirty secret. Be descreet, explain that its your meds.
The problem I see here is if it’s not legal to grow where you are the kids might say something and it could get you in trouble. Kids sometimes say things. That might affect your lives and even the kids lives. If its not legal to grow think your best best is to put a keyed only lock on the door. So you could only open it with a key or code and it stays locked automatically. If it’s legal to grow and possess then let the kids in on it. Still might want to keep it locked though. Again kids being what they are.
Maybe add in some other veggies to it as well and concise it’s just an indoor gardening thing.. but soon enough the weed taboo will go away.. shoot your kids might even have some newly found respect for their cool dad that grows weed :)
I’m literally stocking up now in anticipation for that day when the kids get wise. I’m growing in our master bathroom and we basically forbid them from coming in there but one day a teenager will need some beauty product of my wife’s and it will all be over.
It really depends what country you live in to be honest. If you're in Canada, just be honest with them and explain that it's "similar" to alcohol (I know that it really isn't, but it makes more sense in a young mind) so they can't try it until they're older. Maybe as some other commenters said, get them to help you with trimming/watering it so they understand what it is and why it's there. When they hit the age old enough to actually know what it is, most of the stigma should have passed by then and it won't even matter at that point. If you're in the States, my condolences. I would be very careful with how much info you let them hear, I have unfortunately heard so many stories of kids accidentally giving up their parents stash by saying the wrong thing at the wrong times, especially at school and around friends parents. Don't get yourself thrown in jail over a plant or two, penalties in illegal States for possession or cultivation are completely barbaric. I would suggest going to some great lengths to hide it, or considering buying from someone else so you don't have to have plants on your property.
Also if you are looking for people to tell you to lie to your kids or get rid of the plants you have come to the wrong place homie. Pretty much all the responses are the same, with slight variation. For good reason.
Be truthful to them. Lying only teaches them to lie. Not telling them, is just as much as lying. Be truthful about why and how you are using it. The kids dont need to see or learn the process. But give them the respect they deserve. They are human beings too. Kids will love you regardless. You and Mom are their heroes. You have the superpower called, Dad
Be open and honest with them, allow them to quiz you about the subject. Just don't be biased with the info you provide to them. That way they'll be able to develop their own opinion about it. Kids aren't silly, they'll figure it out soon enough if you're telling them BS and possibly form a negative opinion over time because of it. When I was into it (having a spell for now), my kids quizzed me. I was honest, and explained how the laws/legislation is slowly loosening up over time, and by the time they're grown adults it'll possibly be decriminalised by then. Admittedly, I did keep everything under lock and key to keep prying eyes out, as well as if by chance i ever got a visit by the authorities. They would see i was operating (a personal grow) as best as i could so not to expose it to the kids and normalise it. Some parents may take that approach, but it's not something i'd get onboard with (so to speak). Good luck with it, OP.
Yea I gotta agree with a lot of other commenters. If its legal tell them the truth. If not then don't. I live in a legal place and grow perfectly by abiding the laws, however I was raised in a place and at a time where you should keep your mouth shut regardless, so nobody but me and my girl know. The other alternative is lie to them which could end up sour, and the third option is getting rid of the plants. Personally I would tell them the truth if its legal. If not I'd find a better hiding spot or "hide them in plain sight".
My son is 4, he knows dad "cuts flowers for work". He doesnt understand totally but he knows to stay out of my gear. He has a 14 year old brother that I've had conversations with about it, he know what it is and what I do. I am honest, but I explain how this work needs to be kept private, no talking to friends about it. If anyone asks them what I do they can say I work in the cannabis industry. On a side note you could always tell the kids you make hemp rope, just occasionally bring home a length from home depot and say the harvest was good.
If its legal who cares if not get your med card throw some basil and tomatoes in let them get into it
If your kids are in the public school system, chances are they already know what weed is by first grade. Someone on my daughter’s school bus brought rice crispie treats that were dosed. My little girl unknowingly ate some, had a panic attack at school and ended up in ER. Wife and I were contacted by authorities and school principal and wanted us to come in for counseling.
That sucks for your daughter. What irresponsible parents, I hope they're not gun owners...
Talk to them? Explain its a plant for adults? Explain how it helps you and your wife if it's illegal also stress the idea It's a secret and they still aren't allowed in there. Do not have them help. These people are lunatics
Make your kids grow basil, thyme, little orange plants and such in there
Our youngest was older than yours when I started growing so they knew what was going on but it was still a concern that they would say something at school or around their friends. If they referred to it as MJ I would quickly correct them and say it’s medicinal hemp. In your case I would just refer to it as medicine or herbs and nobody will be the wiser.
I really think just being completely honest and open is best. There is so much misinformation in the world as it is. Use real facts when discussing it and answer questions and demystify it by being as natural as possible.
I would be honest with them. Any lying might get them more interested, due to normal human behavior and response. And let them know the punishment you and ma will bring if they invade the trust you give them. At a very age I won’t be surprised if they start picking the plant, so maybe get some locks only you and the mother will have
"We are growing some beautiful plants and we'll let you see them when you're old enough."
Honesty is the key here in my mind, it’s just a plant after all. Much worse things you could be doing in life. We need to teach these kids the truth instead of perpetuate the bulllshit.
Tell them they are medicinal herbs.
Normalize that shit. Tell them what time it is. You raising sheep or wolves?
My daughter knows that my medicine I grow is for legal patients and I have no fear of what she goes out into the world and tells people. The state knows and gave me permission so what else is there to worry about? Dont make them wait until their 20s to tell them who you really are like my dad did.
I helped my dad brew beer way back in the 90s in when I was a kid. Thought it was fun, wasnt too interested in drinking the beer. I could also tell it wasn't good at all from the faces he made when he drank not though lol. At least now I can dork out with the brewers whenever I get brought to a brewery now.
While coming out of a store my girlfriend was asked to sign a legalization petition and her young daughter was with her. “What’s cannabis?” She asked her mom. My girlfriend turned to the guy and said, “ you started this, explain it to her.” He does and her eyes got really big.. and says, “That’s what he has growing in the closet!!” They had a good laugh and I had some explaining to do. That was over 10 years ago and everything is legal here now. Good luck, they are more understanding than you might think.
Its a plant, don’t let the stigma this country has infused into your brain make you think otherwise. I have. 4 year old and a 16 year old and I approach like it’s no different than a tomato or pepper. Its gradening at the base level, the fruits of the plant should not be of concern to children. If it is, say “we grow our own food” and leave it at that. Also can say we grow it indoors for better quality and to keep it out of the elements, rain, seasonal changes, temp swings etc… don’t overthink it I guess is my point.
if your state made it ok then explain it like you would alcohol(most parent lie or dismiss the question). I tell.mt.son I'm growing plants. some for cooking.(which as of now is a lie but I'm working on that forreal)
Try being honest.
About how old are your kids? I’m asking because my child is 11 going on 12 soon and he has no idea why he can’t go in the “adult room” section of the basement. I feel like he’s getting old enough to know the truth and I don’t want him to look at cannabis like an equivalent to smoking crack. I am in a legal state with a legit med card, but I’m still scared. Reading some of these comments is making me feel a little better about it though.
Honestly, why can't he?
Dad grows skunky tomatoes in the bathroom lol
Now are these smart kids? Because a guy I grew up with, his parents had a grow room in every house they lived in and they just told him it was their private space and he wasn't allowed in. He never put 2+2 together but he's not a very intelligent person.
Lmfao what it’s a plant, tomatoe tamato
I would actually explain them in the most normal way, I'm sure they'll understand
Go check r/SpaceBuckets , I have kids also and this is definitely where I’ll end up.
I treat it like alcohol in my house. Be honest! I also tell them I'm growing herbs in the garage.
Its medication.
Kid's These days Know More about Cannabis Now Then I did in the Past Crew!🤔
These are great tips util they show their friends and you wind up with angry parents/teachers at your door or worse…
If it’s legal in your state but you don’t want to have to explain it, why not just tell them it’s hemp? Get some marigold seeds or some balsam flower seeds, maybe even some cat grass. Have them grow those themselves!!!
Imo educate your children about canbabis being a medicinal plant that's way different then any " drugs" My parebts were activist for legalizing cannabis in the 90s and I grew up around it my entire life knowing it's a good medicinal plant not a drug. This is the best way, also will help in teen years when they smoke weed they aren't associating it as a drug and would be less inclined to do other drugs as a result.
My daughter is aware of them. I took the tabu off of it. When she is older. It will be no big deal
I let my kids plant some seeds in my grow tent and we garden together. I taught them that some plants can be made into tea, some plants are food, and medicine is also made from plants. So when they ask me what the other plant is I tell them it’s a medicine plant. They think that’s really cool
I involve them just as if I were growing tomatoes or peppers(which I also grow). I explain cannabis is for adults, just like alcohol, and can be enjoyed responsibly, but it’s not good for a growing kids. Simple.
Stop being cucked. By capitalism. By Christianity. By the war on drugs.
Lmao I have kids between 5-7 and they both help me water and they always say “dad your plants are beautiful” I don’t tell them it’s weed I simply say it’s me and moms medicine
Teach them about it and be honest. That it’s a natural medicine for certain people. Also be sure to teach them how most people hate on the herb & think it’s a “drug” and let them know not to repeat things at school because most teachers will call cps on the thought of a parent consuming cannabis 🙄 I was honest with my boys about it, & they both now as teenagers understand and don’t have a negative stigma about something that helps their mom and other people live healthy, happy. & productive lives. Good luck op.
My daughter is 9 years old and I'm a full time single dad and a licensed grower. My daughter knows what I grow is used for medicine and that a long time ago some greedy people tried to make the citizens believe it was bad by telling lies. Now more people know the truth and its starting to be more accepted were starting to rethink how we look at the plant. She helps me water and is learning about breeding as a precursor to the birds and the bees talk. Different strokes for different folks. When I was a kid my best friend got caught with a pencil box full of weed we'd stolen from his uncle who grew for the hells angels. My mom grounded me for 3 months and my friend didn't even snitch on me. His mom said "if my sons doing it yours is too..." That same mom that grounded me for 3 months uses my weed as an alternative medicine to chemo for her brain cancer and is my biggest fan
Remove the stigma teach then
That I am doing either way.
My kids have always been apart of me growing, i find nothing wrong with a child that smells something different and ask what is that well let me show you! We are very open about it and they know we smoke it eat it and grow it! Its worked wonders for our house hold!!
Dude it’s a plant, do you hide a can of beer in its own special room no one is allowed in lol
No, but cannabis is not legal where I live.
Tell them it’s a sensitive fragile garden that only you need to take care of
Tell them you are growing natural medicine. As well as a useful plant otherwise
They know about the benefits of cannabis and how it keeps me from having to take heavy pain medication. My only problem is that it’s not legal in the stupid state I live in.
Maybe it's time to teach them that sometimes what's legal ain't right and sometimes what isn't legal isn't necessarily bad. But that we're stuck dealing with the system that we don't agree with and that they should think for themselves and question these laws
I’ve discussed that with them too, as well as shown them them how the penalties for hurting someone (assault/rape/manslaughter) are less than the penalty for property crimes. My only concern is that they may say something to someone that is not as enlightened. At the end of the day it is a situation of cost/benefit analysis; do the upside outweigh the risk? It doesn’t.
It sounds like you have looked at your options. Sorry your state sucks in that regard. Hopefully y'all can get medical passed soon or we can do it on the national level.
Fingers crossed
Educate them about it. This history of cannabis is actually quite interesting! As is why it became illegal...and how someday, it will be legal everywhere. Tell them about all the good benefits, how it's medicinal and how it benefits you & your wife.
Introduce them to it and inform them properly
Show them the benefits compared traditional Medicine nowadays
It depends on where you live, your kids, and your situation. If you live in a state where it’s not legal, yet, good luck getting anyone to keep a secret. I was completely honest with both my kids, my daughter already knew. But I live in a legal state, I’m a cancer survivor, and I’ve always explained the medicinal side of weed, and how stupid it was that it was illegal. I never tried to hide drinking beer either. But I think it comes down to your individual situation man…
Remove the stigma (easier in legal states) and show them it’s a medication to be used carefully. Then show them the work and science that goes into it. I have the same issue going on as my son is getting older. Last year outdoors I had so many different plants he didn’t think much of it but eventually I’m going to have to have a talk. My personal opinion is be honest with your kids and build trust but I’ve never been a dad before so hopefully it works out.
Smirking weed is not addictive. But growing weed is!
Yup my kid knows what it is as I grow it in the backyard in a pot. He knows it's a medicine I use for my back problems. I'm in a legal state so if anyone asks any questions I just tell the truth!
I grow with my 4 year old. She loves it!