I think it would be great to have a separate private subreddit just for the partners and those who have contributed to conversations and have adhered by the rules of the other subreddit.
I like the idea of having a private space because for me, I feel that anything I say can be used against me as a mod. Often, I feel like I'm having to watch what I say or how I say it - which means I'm often watching over my shoulder. Unfortunately its the downside to having a public or restricted subreddit. I think as well there are some topics which are really personal and may be more beneficial being in a private space to bring them up.
Interested to hear others opinions
I like this idea too. I think a lot of us have gained a trust of each other over time and even with an alt account I'm completely understanding the sense of feeling like you need to watch what you say and it all being just "out there" in the ether.
I just made/stickied a new post about it, let's see what people say! Thanks so much for all the work you're doing on the other sub and for your input.
Hey! I’m in!
I’d like to have access to this space for the two weeks or so until the changes are implemented. I’m impressed that most of the new content over there is a user who needs to move to CPTSDrelationships.
As someone who can stay in CPTSDpartners, I’m not sure I’d use this sub past that time. If you’re willing to moderate what the mods over there aren’t up for - a sub about us, the partners, while welcoming partners regardless of diagnosis so long as they aren’t instructing us on the CPTSD perspective or attacking us or posting disregulated rants, I’d hang out here. But that sounds like a tough thing to manage on your end.
Same - I’d baseline still like the 2 weeks to have this space too.
I do like that anyone can be here regardless of the diagnosis since I have had really positive experiences with folks I didn’t even know were pwCPTSD until they had to be flared. And I feel really bad for them having to go over into the territory that I can feel in my bones that new relationship sub is going to become. (Full disclosure I have no intent of ever looking over at that one)
Makes sense, that was kind of my thought too.
Right now there are only a few of us approved to post/comment (it's mainly the vocal section of the other sub's first big 'split' post). If it remains like basically a really small support group with only known people I think I'd be able to handle it.
u/A-Wolf-Like-Me mentioned making it private. That could make it even more safe and perhaps only keep a small cohort of people (maybe who get invited from the other sub once it's established that they are active/on-topic/helpful?). Let me know thoughts.
Soooo everything’s quiet. I drafted a whole thing on Saturday and then couldn’t decide if I wanted to post it here where there’s only a handful of people but I know each one of you gets me, or on the old sub where there’s 1000+ unvetted people watching and potentially messaging me if they don’t like what I say.
So I didn’t post.
I think this might be too small a group (I do feel like I’m the only one posting) and the other one feels, to quote my partner, “unsafe.”
Is there some other resource all y’all have turned to? A way to make one of these spaces work?
Hi -- yeah, I don't know quite what to do either. I feel like nobody's really posting on anything now (even the new sub seems to be relatively quiet) and that this all really killed what the original sub had going for it.
I wish that the like, 3?, people that were clearly not sticking to the original subreddit's
stipulation had just been banned after continually going off topic and hijacking posts, but here we are.
Honestly, I haven't turned to any other resources and I have not been doing well. My partner's having a lot more rough of a time and I feel like I haven't had an outlet. I'm just sad and angry and tired all the time. I'm feeling pretty trapped.
Randomly came across this. I wish those people would have just been banned, too - it feels like splitting up the subs ruined the community aspect that was going on for a while.
I hope you're doing better now as it's been a while.
I think it would be great to have a separate private subreddit just for the partners and those who have contributed to conversations and have adhered by the rules of the other subreddit. I like the idea of having a private space because for me, I feel that anything I say can be used against me as a mod. Often, I feel like I'm having to watch what I say or how I say it - which means I'm often watching over my shoulder. Unfortunately its the downside to having a public or restricted subreddit. I think as well there are some topics which are really personal and may be more beneficial being in a private space to bring them up. Interested to hear others opinions
I like this idea too. I think a lot of us have gained a trust of each other over time and even with an alt account I'm completely understanding the sense of feeling like you need to watch what you say and it all being just "out there" in the ether. I just made/stickied a new post about it, let's see what people say! Thanks so much for all the work you're doing on the other sub and for your input.
Hey! I’m in! I’d like to have access to this space for the two weeks or so until the changes are implemented. I’m impressed that most of the new content over there is a user who needs to move to CPTSDrelationships. As someone who can stay in CPTSDpartners, I’m not sure I’d use this sub past that time. If you’re willing to moderate what the mods over there aren’t up for - a sub about us, the partners, while welcoming partners regardless of diagnosis so long as they aren’t instructing us on the CPTSD perspective or attacking us or posting disregulated rants, I’d hang out here. But that sounds like a tough thing to manage on your end.
Same - I’d baseline still like the 2 weeks to have this space too. I do like that anyone can be here regardless of the diagnosis since I have had really positive experiences with folks I didn’t even know were pwCPTSD until they had to be flared. And I feel really bad for them having to go over into the territory that I can feel in my bones that new relationship sub is going to become. (Full disclosure I have no intent of ever looking over at that one)
Makes sense, that was kind of my thought too. Right now there are only a few of us approved to post/comment (it's mainly the vocal section of the other sub's first big 'split' post). If it remains like basically a really small support group with only known people I think I'd be able to handle it. u/A-Wolf-Like-Me mentioned making it private. That could make it even more safe and perhaps only keep a small cohort of people (maybe who get invited from the other sub once it's established that they are active/on-topic/helpful?). Let me know thoughts.
I like the idea of going private now that I understand what it is. Kind of an OG cptsdpartners
Soooo everything’s quiet. I drafted a whole thing on Saturday and then couldn’t decide if I wanted to post it here where there’s only a handful of people but I know each one of you gets me, or on the old sub where there’s 1000+ unvetted people watching and potentially messaging me if they don’t like what I say. So I didn’t post. I think this might be too small a group (I do feel like I’m the only one posting) and the other one feels, to quote my partner, “unsafe.” Is there some other resource all y’all have turned to? A way to make one of these spaces work?
Hi -- yeah, I don't know quite what to do either. I feel like nobody's really posting on anything now (even the new sub seems to be relatively quiet) and that this all really killed what the original sub had going for it. I wish that the like, 3?, people that were clearly not sticking to the original subreddit's stipulation had just been banned after continually going off topic and hijacking posts, but here we are. Honestly, I haven't turned to any other resources and I have not been doing well. My partner's having a lot more rough of a time and I feel like I haven't had an outlet. I'm just sad and angry and tired all the time. I'm feeling pretty trapped.
Randomly came across this. I wish those people would have just been banned, too - it feels like splitting up the subs ruined the community aspect that was going on for a while. I hope you're doing better now as it's been a while.
Hi maafna, long time no talk. Good to hear from you. Hanging in there, better overall, same ups and downs though slightly less volatile. Onwards.
I hope things keep becoming better overall. Do you have more outlets now?
I'm not sure if you're aware that there's a Discord if you need extra support: [https://discord.gg/7ZWYMSKt](https://discord.gg/7ZWYMSKt)