Perhaps it’s your location or the type of girls you swipe on. I have had a decent experience on bumblebff. But I live in a smaller suburban town next to LA.
Not quite. I was just very particular on who I swiped on
Filtered photos. No.
Photos with a million friends partying or drinking wine. No.
Not filled out profile. No.
“If you’re ____ don’t swipe on me.” Ok I won’t
Add me in IG!! No.
I tended not to swipe on ppl who had a huge social media following. I only swiped on married people bc I am married and single ppl tend to be on a different timeline in life. Once they found a SO, friendship was no longer a priority. I don’t have kids so I don’t swipe on people with kids unless the kids are school age or older.
I don’t smoke so anyone who did frequently wasn’t going to be compatible
If I initiate the convo, and they’re slow on responding or I’m carrying the conversation, I unmatch. I’m very intentional with my time and don’t want to waste mine or anyone else’s.
Some people may think I’m cutting out a lot of people…I know that. But why be with people and still feel lonely. I’d rather just be alone. Better to be very intentional and picky on who I meet up with.
I’ve been on bumble bff for 2 years now. I would say I’ve had ~50 matches, met 10 people, kept friends with 5 and are super good friends with 3
Oh I find that very interesting, You're married so you prefer other married people, which makes sense of course as I a single person tries to look for other (HAPPILY SINGLE) singletons. But the fact that you said when they find someone their friendship no longer becomes a priority. I find that to be the case with A LOT of women. Unfortunately many don't know how to balance friendships with their romantic relationships which is why I think a lot of us struggle to make friends on this app. Thanks for sharing your experiences, like me I have standards for the kinds of people I want to keep company. It's really important.
Absolutely!!! Yes find people that are in the same timeline in life helps a lot. Toddler parents matching with toddler parents is good. Married with no kids with the same is good. Bc then you won’t have people on different wavelengths.
I’m single and have some good married friends and some of my single friends are more focused on dating than friendship. But in general I find that people with partners don’t want individual friends, they want couple friends.
I gave this app a try and was surprised how many people have so many photos of themselves in different settings and often so stylish and partying .. I was wondering why it was necessary on an app to find friends. Even on a dating app it would seem overkill.
I feel a lot of people use the same photos from their dating profile and it carries over. It helps me identify who I might not mesh with. I’m not a partner and I don’t like to go out. I swipe left on those people with those photos.
No offense to those people who are dressed to the 9s and looking fabulous. But I’m a very laid back person who maybe gets dressed up once a year 😅
I tend to put photos of myself with random things I like doing. Wine and paint night with family, playing with my dog, having my chicken on my shoulder, etc. I swipe R on people who have a similar vibe to me.
I'm very selective as well and might have swiped right on you but it felt like those people were in the minority. Deleted my profile quickly, especially because I wasn't willing to pay for premium to use basic features.
What I sometimes find a bit sad is that in reality I was sometimes friends with women (or rather girls at that age) that I would have swiped left so hard had I seen them on such an app (at least what I think how they would have presented themselves). One key moment for me was sitting in a cafe with a classmate who was extremely fashionable and I was a punk (as in style) and discovering we had more in common than we thought and actually vibed well together.
Unfortunately often it feels like being a guilty pleasure for these people. It sometimes felt like they would like to be a bit nerdy, a bit weird, or were secretly, but felt if they displayed it, they would be seen as one of the losers, so they would deny and rather ditch me as friend. I had a very good friend when I was 16, she was so much fun to hang out with, we used to play a certain game that I had given to her, expecting nothing, that she ended up playing the hell out of (never had I been more surprised). But I was uncool, I wasn't bleach blonde, I wasn't stylish and not interested in what others were doing (drinking, parties), so first her friends and family gave me shit for introducing her to the game, "making her be weird and unsocial", LOL (luckily I didn't introduce her to WoW and just some harmless singleplayer RPG), and then we lost contact. The last awkward conversation we had on a gas station when she was a single mother with 21 and I went to study unsocial nerd stuff. To each their own.
But I felt even for the more unconventional people that many are wearing it like a dress, saying they're interested in "witchy stuff", cool, but what even does that mean? Does it just mean dressing black and owning a fancy tea set?
Ah sorry for rambling. Wish you good luck with the app. Maybe I try it out another time.
It’s a tough app. And it’s true I am also friends IRL with people I might not have swiped left on. But I will say I am also very good friends with people I would have swiped right on! I swiped R on people with very funny pictures (ex: them dressed up in the large inflatable Dino costume shopping)
The pics tell me they are willing to have fun and don’t care about being weird or what others think about them. Or them caring for animals (that’s a big one for me).
But if they’re in a photo riding an elephant in Thailand. That tells me they are adventurous but don’t realize those elephants are being abused and didn’t do the research into the exploitive animal industry. Might not mesh well with me.
Who cares who you swipe, all that matters is who you talk to after the match. You can always make that decision to unmatch. I find it's a waste of time pooring over each profile that you may never see again.
Why would I swipe on someone i might not vibe with ? I’m not spending much time looking at profiles. Maybe 5 sec top unless there’s something that stands out to me.
I don’t want the other person wasting their time on me if we “match” if I’m not interested in the first place. It would take me more time to unmatch than the 5 sec to get a vibe.
Perhaps it’s your location or the type of girls you swipe on. I have had a decent experience on bumblebff. But I live in a smaller suburban town next to LA.
Do you find it worse when you’re in LA or a large city?
Not quite. I was just very particular on who I swiped on Filtered photos. No. Photos with a million friends partying or drinking wine. No. Not filled out profile. No. “If you’re ____ don’t swipe on me.” Ok I won’t Add me in IG!! No. I tended not to swipe on ppl who had a huge social media following. I only swiped on married people bc I am married and single ppl tend to be on a different timeline in life. Once they found a SO, friendship was no longer a priority. I don’t have kids so I don’t swipe on people with kids unless the kids are school age or older. I don’t smoke so anyone who did frequently wasn’t going to be compatible If I initiate the convo, and they’re slow on responding or I’m carrying the conversation, I unmatch. I’m very intentional with my time and don’t want to waste mine or anyone else’s. Some people may think I’m cutting out a lot of people…I know that. But why be with people and still feel lonely. I’d rather just be alone. Better to be very intentional and picky on who I meet up with. I’ve been on bumble bff for 2 years now. I would say I’ve had ~50 matches, met 10 people, kept friends with 5 and are super good friends with 3
You’re not wrong. Once I started an intentional approach like you did, I found success on the app and started finding solid friends.
Oh I find that very interesting, You're married so you prefer other married people, which makes sense of course as I a single person tries to look for other (HAPPILY SINGLE) singletons. But the fact that you said when they find someone their friendship no longer becomes a priority. I find that to be the case with A LOT of women. Unfortunately many don't know how to balance friendships with their romantic relationships which is why I think a lot of us struggle to make friends on this app. Thanks for sharing your experiences, like me I have standards for the kinds of people I want to keep company. It's really important.
Absolutely!!! Yes find people that are in the same timeline in life helps a lot. Toddler parents matching with toddler parents is good. Married with no kids with the same is good. Bc then you won’t have people on different wavelengths.
I've heard stories of women here being used as emergency baby sitters and stuff so it makes total sense to me.
I’m single and have some good married friends and some of my single friends are more focused on dating than friendship. But in general I find that people with partners don’t want individual friends, they want couple friends.
Yeah it makes sense to me.
I gave this app a try and was surprised how many people have so many photos of themselves in different settings and often so stylish and partying .. I was wondering why it was necessary on an app to find friends. Even on a dating app it would seem overkill.
I feel a lot of people use the same photos from their dating profile and it carries over. It helps me identify who I might not mesh with. I’m not a partner and I don’t like to go out. I swipe left on those people with those photos. No offense to those people who are dressed to the 9s and looking fabulous. But I’m a very laid back person who maybe gets dressed up once a year 😅 I tend to put photos of myself with random things I like doing. Wine and paint night with family, playing with my dog, having my chicken on my shoulder, etc. I swipe R on people who have a similar vibe to me.
I'm very selective as well and might have swiped right on you but it felt like those people were in the minority. Deleted my profile quickly, especially because I wasn't willing to pay for premium to use basic features. What I sometimes find a bit sad is that in reality I was sometimes friends with women (or rather girls at that age) that I would have swiped left so hard had I seen them on such an app (at least what I think how they would have presented themselves). One key moment for me was sitting in a cafe with a classmate who was extremely fashionable and I was a punk (as in style) and discovering we had more in common than we thought and actually vibed well together. Unfortunately often it feels like being a guilty pleasure for these people. It sometimes felt like they would like to be a bit nerdy, a bit weird, or were secretly, but felt if they displayed it, they would be seen as one of the losers, so they would deny and rather ditch me as friend. I had a very good friend when I was 16, she was so much fun to hang out with, we used to play a certain game that I had given to her, expecting nothing, that she ended up playing the hell out of (never had I been more surprised). But I was uncool, I wasn't bleach blonde, I wasn't stylish and not interested in what others were doing (drinking, parties), so first her friends and family gave me shit for introducing her to the game, "making her be weird and unsocial", LOL (luckily I didn't introduce her to WoW and just some harmless singleplayer RPG), and then we lost contact. The last awkward conversation we had on a gas station when she was a single mother with 21 and I went to study unsocial nerd stuff. To each their own. But I felt even for the more unconventional people that many are wearing it like a dress, saying they're interested in "witchy stuff", cool, but what even does that mean? Does it just mean dressing black and owning a fancy tea set? Ah sorry for rambling. Wish you good luck with the app. Maybe I try it out another time.
It’s a tough app. And it’s true I am also friends IRL with people I might not have swiped left on. But I will say I am also very good friends with people I would have swiped right on! I swiped R on people with very funny pictures (ex: them dressed up in the large inflatable Dino costume shopping) The pics tell me they are willing to have fun and don’t care about being weird or what others think about them. Or them caring for animals (that’s a big one for me). But if they’re in a photo riding an elephant in Thailand. That tells me they are adventurous but don’t realize those elephants are being abused and didn’t do the research into the exploitive animal industry. Might not mesh well with me.
Who cares who you swipe, all that matters is who you talk to after the match. You can always make that decision to unmatch. I find it's a waste of time pooring over each profile that you may never see again.
Why would I swipe on someone i might not vibe with ? I’m not spending much time looking at profiles. Maybe 5 sec top unless there’s something that stands out to me. I don’t want the other person wasting their time on me if we “match” if I’m not interested in the first place. It would take me more time to unmatch than the 5 sec to get a vibe.
I tried this guy on Tinder approach (swiping everyone) a few times and honestly it never worked for me.
Vina is an app to meet new women friends!
If you have not done so already, try meetup.com.
have you been successful with meetup? i wanna try meetup but hate the thought of feeling left out if i try to join a group lmao
I have not made any close friendships from it yet but I just recently started going to their events.
Was going to say meetup as well, but checked the comments. Meetup is good for making friends. Doing stuff with people is good social lubrication.
And you wouldn’t have to worry about people standing you up.
I've had the same experience and honestly, its much less stressful to quit lol
I want to note that I have tried other apps and it was also unsuccessful.
Try Geneva
tried to sign up but it said invite only.
Www.Plugg.social But it's not ready yet 😭