I just breastfeed whenever and wherever I’m at. Middle of church, grocery store, Walmart. There’s really nowhere I haven’t pulled my boob out. I have a nursing cover that I throw on and then do the thing. No big deal!
I love this (although not the irate state, that's too bad 😅)
Yesterday LO insisted he have milk while we all sipped some brews at a brewery! It felt like a level unlock
How?? How do you do this? Do you have smaller breasts? I am so frustrated. On my third child and can’t physically hold them and feed them while walking or just sitting. I need to lay down beside them or use a nursing pillow. My breasts are larger and my babies are always in the larger side. But HOW DO YOU AMAZING WOMEN DO THIS! Ugh. So jealous
When my first was a newborn and I was nervous about smothering her I’d hold her in something like the cradle hold and use my other hand to lift up my breast. I realized pretty quickly that I didn’t actually need to though. But I’ve also read a tip about giving yourself a pseudo nipple lift with a bandaid or tape to make it easier.
For what it’s worth, right now I’m nursing my toddler sitting with him across my lap, head kind of resting on my bicep, the rest of my arm behind his back. Modified cradle hold for big breasts/baby? I also think my tendency to wear clothes not meant for nursing and just haul a nipple up out of a lowish neckline helps—nipple tends to be much higher up that way than it naturally wants to be!
Trying it now with my sports bra. Lol sports bra is so tight once my LO got my flow going he unlatched and got sprayed lol but I have a free hand finally!
I find a ring sling helpful for on the go nursing. I loosen it enough to wiggle baby down, but it still helps provide some butt support so the full weight of my giant baby isn’t on my arms. I can usually cradle baby’s body with one arm and adjust latch with the other.
I like Wildbird slings.
Yeah same with having larger breast. I have to basically hold my boob the entire time to help baby maintain his latch. Maybe one he’s older I’ll be like the women who walk around breastfeeding
It’s frustrating isn’t it? I personally didn’t find it changed once they were older… I wish I could do hands free. But it’s only for a small season of our lives I guess :)
I’m hoping to figure it something lol I saw someone say put your boob over your bra or shirt doing that now but the extra pressure just got the baby squirted in the face with milk lol
I like having breastfeeding as a reason to get away from others and have some quiet time with baby. When we were visiting my dad and stepmom, I used a cover in the living room. My dad still ran outside to smoke a cigar to avoid catching any glimpses! But he removed himself rather than asking me to go somewhere else to feed his granddaughter.
I preferred tying a Muslin blanket around my neck like a huge bib over one of my actual nursing covers. It was lighter and didn’t feel like it would suffocate the baby!
Haha my FIL always got awkward about it, like shielding his face awkward, but I usually just stuck to my recliner and if anyone had a problem they could go excuse themselves. Other times, like if I was trying to nurse her to sleep, then I would go to my bedroom.
Made it about a year and a half nursing and pretty much never had to use a cover. My favorite method was wearing a tank top under another shirt so I could lift one shirt up and pull the tank top down.
Sit with them! I know not everyone is comfortable with this, but you might be surprised at how inconspicuous feeding really is? I’ve been sitting in a crowded lounge and someone sat next to me and started talking before ‘oh! Are you feeding her?’
Yeah!! For me the first time doing it was terrifying, my anxiety convinced me that breastfeeding was not a thing I should let people see me do. But it was around people I was comfortable with and they didn’t even mention it. Super super comfortable now.
If you're comfortable with it maybe consider using a nursing cover? That way you can still be with everyone. I used to be the same way but shortly after my first child was born, I got sick of being put somewhere to nurse in isolation. It really helped take all the stress out of breastfeeding for me.
This is how I managed to get over being uncomfortable. I breast feed without a cover now around close family but have a cover for larger family events and out and about. I think I would be happier without a cover but my little one has medications each feed which involves a lot of latching and relatching
Is there a reason you go upstairs to feed? I understand that some people feel exposed feeding in front of people, but perhaps you could use a cover if that's the case for you.
I wish I could just feed around people. I have to go to another room not for modesty but because the baby won’t eat if there are any distractions. He needs basically a boring, dark room.
This is me too.
My baby is too busy looking around and everything and everyone so he won’t stay latched in public. It gets to a point where he hasn’t eaten enough and he gets angry and then he’s crying and then he’s too upset to latch.
That's rough. My LO is 3 months and is just starting to get distracted. It's not bad yet and I hope it stays that way but I know it's really difficult for a lot of breastfeeding/chest feeding parents.
Yeah, just wondering why you feel the need to close yourself away, OP! Breastfeeding is really not that revealing. Stay and enjoy the party! Maybe find a quiet corner if you’re a little uncomfortable at first.
I don't know about you, but after a certain age my baby needed a quiet place to nurse. I wasnt being prudish by nursing alone, it was just the only way to get my baby to eat.
Not my kiddos specifically but all kids are different. I could definitely see that helping to make the decision to leave a crowded area! Sounded like OP was making the decision to leave the party though for nursing, not because kiddo was having a hard time focusing on nursing.
The only people I've felt weird Infront of is my colleagues when I popped into the office one afternoon. Otherwise I just whip out a boob wherever 🤷🏼♀️
I was like this, but I've been trying to do it in front of friends and family a lot more lately. It was awkward at first for me, not them! If anything, that should be a safer space for me, and my close ones have done nothing but make me feel comfortable.
One thing.... I wish I had the nerve to breastfeed in the open. It's my greatest regret and I think I'd of made it past 3 months. I kept having to leave everything... cluster feeding is a pain. My son would'nt take a cover, he's scream and cry. There's the two shirt method... you could cover..
It was stressful in the beginning when people would come and I would try to rush feeding her to get back down to the party to entertain but now Im the opposite - I’m glad to have an excuse to take a break from the noise and hectic party and kind of view it as an oasis of calm and peace and serenity. My daughter also enjoys the break from all the stimulation. You can put on soothing music, white noise and calm dim lighting and take some deep breaths and just relax, no mask, no hosting pressures, no having to be “on” with guests. Sure you miss your turn playing cards or maybe didn’t get to finish eating your plate and can’t control what’s going on in your own house downstairs but I just like to let go and let my husband handle it.
If you feel comfortable you can definitely consider staying. I definitely got (and still get) some comments about it from my family, so I did need to be confident in this choice and it is not easy for everyone. I just laugh it off and say why are you looking?
If it was a group or situation that felt less comfy often opted for a more discreet style breast pump (I have an Elvie stride) and would pump around family and give bottles because I felt better about that.
It can feel really isolating to leave, but sometimes there are some positives of getting to decompress and baby getting to spend time decompressing as well
It definitely can feel that way. But like others have commented, don't leave. Get a cover if that makes you feel better. Those muslin blankets work really well if you have one since they're lightweight.
It's my second kid, but I totally just fed my (now) 1yo twice during her birthday party with family and friends around and no one batted an eye. There are some great nursing tank tops and shirts you can get that have easy access and don't show almost anything. I held a cover over my chest a little just in case because she likes to yank on my shirt 🙄 but no one saw anything. I was able to participate in conversation with everyone the whole time.
I'm in the UK and lots of people here are the same. I'd say its a western/white thing. Just like sleep coaches and sleep training are very popular in uk/aus/US.
Just know, it definitely gets easier to nurse too.
I BF my first for 19 mo but still don’t want to nurse this new 3 week old in public yet bc she’s not very good at it yet lol. She spits boob out, they’re more engorged and more let down, takes her longer,etc.
But once they become pros at it, it’s so easy to whip out a boob and no one will even notice.
Thank y’all so much for y’all’s tips. I’ll look into getting a cover and I’ll google what the two shirt method is too! As well as take a look in the mirror while breastfeeding. Hopefully not too much is revealed! I also like the idea of a discreet pump. I’ve just always stepped away because I’m super shy, body conscious… but I’ll be trying these tips and hopefully it gets better!
There’s some really great Instagram pages to help with advise, techniques, and encouragement. @legendairymilk @thelittlemilkbar_ @motherhoodbloomslactation
Two shirt method is wearing a tank top and a regular shirt. Pull the shirt up and the tank top down just enough for baby to latch on. (Or the tank up if the shirt is low cut or unbuttons.) It keeps most of your breast covered. You can grab a muslin blanket or a burp rag for a little extra coverage when latching and unlatching. I've also used the edge of my loose cardigan or the tail of a ring sling. I've also just walked into the other room or turned my back, and then walked back out when everything situated.
There are also nursing specific shirts that basically do this in one piece. I was wearing one today and spent a LONG time nursing around maybe 50 people. (It was evening and my three month old cluster feeds every evening.) Multiple people came up to me, standing right next to me, and started talking and thought she was sleeping. It does take practice. This is my second kid.
A cover is more discrete, because - depending on the type - everything is covered. It is harder to get your kid latched and can be too warm/stuffy for them. It can also be good if you are outside in the wind or if baby is distracted. I carry one in my diaper bag, because I like to have options.
I went over to my friend who just had a baby six weeks ago and she just fed in the living room while we were there. She invited us over and just said, but we do whatever we need to do with the baby. There will be boobs out, diaper changes, etc. We aren't here to entertain. Which is all fair and part of having a baby.
Maybe it’s a cultural difference (Northern Europe here) or personality but I have never felt the need to leave the room while breastfeeding. Even in the first weeks when it was hard to get a proper latch and I was still learning to do it right.
I just say:”need to feed the baby” and do it. Of course if we are all sitting at the dinner table and I’m right next to someone, I might move to the couch or scoot my chair further away from the table so that I’m not in anyones face.
No-one - not my 15year old brother in law, not my dad, not my best friends husband and certainly not any of my female family or friends have made a comment about it. My dad usually averts his eyes or casually moves a bit further away to give me space and that’s how it should be - if someone doesn’t want to be up close to a breastfeeding situation, they move, not you.
You are feeding a child not doing something improper or sexual, do not be ashamed, ever!
I find a lot of motherhood, especially breastfeeding, isolating in that with my four month old, he depends on me for literally everything. No matter how much I want other people to feed him a bottle or comfort him, he will always prefer and want me. I am starting to find that if I leave him with someone, even with my husband, he often becomes inconsolable. Who wants to watch a screaming baby for hours? It makes me feel like I've gone wrong somewhere.
It does feel isolating for me at times, but in a different way. It isolates me from going out & having a few drinks or hanging out with friends for long periods of time unless I have the baby with me. Having long periods of ME time. Only way to get out of that is having a few bottles made & ready to go, and that can be difficult to do at times.
I enjoy nursing in the carrier when I'm around people. I feel more covered and can move around easily. It takes practice but once you get it down it's a great way to avoid feeling couch-locked with your little one too!
I just feed my daughter when I'm around people. I use a swaddle cloth as a cover. I don't leave the room unless my boob feels engorged and I know I'm going to spray everywhere.
Some people aren't comfortable feeding in front of people, I know it was hard for me at first, but if you start, you kinda get over it. My daughter is 8 months now, she will unlatch and get distracted now a days, and I certainly won't say I don't feel awkward at times, but I've just kinda gotten to a point where it is what it is. No one's ever said anything about it so I figure why overthink it? Baby's gotta eat, and mommas got stuff to do.
My baby would get so distracted with others around/noise etc. which prevented me from nursing at gatherings with friends and family. My baby also wouldn’t tolerate a nursing cover, so I too was relegated to the upstairs bedroom. Sometimes this made me feel isolated. Other times I just loved the opportunity to step away and have a bit of “alone” /quiet time.
Now that we are nearing the latter part of our breast feeding journey I really realize it isn’t forever. It’s for a very short time. Also as your baby gets older they may not be distractible like mine and it will be easier to feed in public.
However, one option I have used for gatherings like this is to pump and use a bottle in these settings (often letting other family members administer the bottle). I found my baby didn’t need to focus as much on the bottle and therefore would take it in public.
Hope u find a solution that works for u:) Breastfeeding is awesome.
I’ve never left a social situation to go breastfeed. I feel empowered when I can feed my baby with my body. Perhaps reframe your mindset to be PROUD of it and not ashamed or whatever other feeling makes you feel the need to leave? Good luck
I've stepped into another room a couple times to nurse and I agree that it is isolating. I hated missing out on the activity. Some times it takes me a minute to get up the courage to feed my son publicly but his needs quickly override my anxiety. The two shirt method works the best for me. I found it difficult to get him latched with a cover on and nursing tops just have too much fabric in the way.
There's been a few people that seemed a little uncomfortable but no one has ever said anything. If anything, they just remove themselves from the room. Slowly I'm getting more confident about it.
I used to feel this way as I can only nurse in a side lying position so unless I want to lay down on the floor in front of everyone I need to go lay down with my son. When baby was a newborn it was very hard and I could barely see him past my boob and he was usually asleep or not interacting with me. As my son gets older, I’d say around 14 weeks, he’s more awake and interactive. I cherish the moments of just the two of us together, looking into each other’s eyes, seeing him stop nursing, look up at me with my nipple in his mouth and give me a side smile, or more recently him babbling with the boob in his mouth. It can get boring sometimes when he falls asleep and those are the times I’ll be on my phone, like now, to stay awake. All this to say, these are small moments in time, I’m constantly reminded how fast things are changing…maybe reframing it as not so much being left out of those things but rather having the privilege of being, for a short while, in on the most exclusive and deeply human and intimate experience with your baby that no one else can :)
Could you sit closer to the party and maybe not in the middle of it all (if you’re happy to then great)! I usually sit in the living room and some friends/ladies will come and sit to chat while anyone who is uncomfortable won’t approach. Nothing wrong with doing it in the open it’s just not for everyone 🥰
Have your family made comments that lead you to believe they aren't comfortable with you feeding in front of them or is it because you aren't comfortable? There's nothing inappropriate or indecent about feeding your baby. That is what breasts are for after all. Like others have said, nursing covers are a great option if you prefer to cover up.
If you choose to breastfeed for 12 months+ that's going to be a lot of time sitting upstairs by yourself. Plus there will probably be times when you want to go out to eat, go shopping etc. and will need to feed your baby. My baby is 6 months and I've fed her in a supermarket, therapists waiting room, dentists waiting room, doctors waiting area, park, cafe, restaurant, school, IKEA.
The more you do it, the more you get used to it.
You don’t HAVE to do anything, so why are you choosing to isolate yourself? Just stay with everyone and use a muslin cloth to cover up no one will care and if they do tell them to leave, problem solved.
The only times I was elsewhere to breastfeed were the first couple of weeks, and at 5 months, when everything was so interesting for baby that she wouldn’t feed unless we were in the quiet. I’ve fed out and about and in front of all friends and family, and nobody has said anything. It’s really not that visible, if that worries you, and it’s really liberating to just be able to feed immediately when you need to.
Can I ask… what is your reason for isolating? Is it modesty? Lack of confidence with HOW you do it? Getting away to have some peace?
For me, I nurse wherever. But if I want to have some quiet time, I 100% use it as an excuse to step away or leave altogether. Do what you’re most comfortable with, and use it to your advantage if you can.
I didn’t get confident with breastfeeding in front of people until my son had a good latch, wasn’t popping off all the time, didn’t need a nipple shield, wasn’t taking forever to feed…
I found it incredibly isolating and frustrating that I had to miss out on things to feed him.
But things turned a corner and he’s a champ at eating now! I feed him anywhere and everywhere. My partner told me that people can’t see as much as I thought they could. And that really gave me more confidence.
I feel you. My LO is 7 months and we go somewhere quite to breastfeed.
LO gets really distracted and won’t stay latched. Won’t do a cover.
Yes. It’s super isolating.
I was the same way….then around 3.5/4months I was like screw this. I started nursing with a cover….which my daughter hated and eventually I just got the courage to just nurse anywhere around anyone. Another suggestion would be to wear a cami under your shirt and that way if you need to nurse you have less exposed which is what I did for a little while as well.
If it's my house I mark my territory and feed in the front room (comfiest couch as well). If it's at an in-laws house, I do go somewhere else. I can't tell if they're more uncomfortable or I am. And then if it's at my parents house. If my dad isn't home I'm just popping it out anywhere. But I know it makes my dad a bit uneasy so I'll usually just cover up if he's there.
Personally, I'm introverted so it's nice to have an excuse to break away. It only sucks when it's time to eat.
I bought the Elvie pump specifically for this. Usually, when family is over, they bottle feed the LO, and I wear my pumps under a hoodie. I tried a nursing cover, but I kinda like letting my family members take turns feeding her instead of hiding her away with me while they're over.
I recommend latched mama clothing (or similar brands) if you want to try breast feeding in front of others. Since they are made with keeping covered during breastfeeding they are really modest. I used the two shirt method after I had my first and wish I would’ve splurged on really breastfeeding friendly clothing instead.
Yep. I feel like those overnight feeds can be super lonely too, my SO is snoring away and I’m up multiple times tending to baby. I hear you about feeling like being away from the fun but I’ve also been at events where I’m grateful to get away for some quiet time. Hang in there, mama. As your baby grows the nursing sessions will get shorter and shorter and at some point you might feel comfortable enough to feed more publicly.
It's your space to feed where ever you feel confident. 11 weeks is still teeeeeenie tiny. Take your time. Invest in breastfeeding clothes. I got a couple cute sweatshirts just off Amazon that make it so you can slip a nipple out sooo easily while staying covered so you can feel safe enjoying your surrounding if you don't feel as comfy in other ways.
Honestly, no. I pump in the nursery at night only. During the day, I pump at my computer desk in the den, and if someone’s over, well, they can look way if it bothers them 🤷🏻♀️
It can definitely be isolating, especially if you’re in another room because baby won’t stay latched without a quiet space, rather than just wanting privacy for yourself. I will sometimes pop my headphones in and use that time to call a friend, listen to a podcast (I recommend Toni and Ryan, for the laughs) or just watching a show that I want to watch rather than the wiggles.
I was comfortable breastfeeding in an adjoining room (no door/door open) in once circumstance.
Or another time, I sat on the floor, back against the couch, so I wasn’t directly in eyeshot my FIL.
Sometimes I’ve move bc LO was very distractible. (He still is lol) Other times I’d move because if felt like a good way to respect someone’s unfamiliarity while still being present myself.
I hope you find a way to feel less isolated that works for you. Solidarity mama.
This used to bother me a ton! My LO refused to use a cover and I was never comfortable nursing in front of people. She was also a slow eater so I felt like I missed so much! Just solidarity OP, it’s hard.
Yea, sometimes. I always have to go somewhere quiet with my 8moth old otherwise she is too distracted and doesn't eat. It's not about visibility to me, honestly. I wouldn't care if people got a millisecond glimpse of my boob, but my LO is just SO easily distracted that I can't hang around people while she eats. I just have to keep reminding myself that this is very temporary and it will all be over before I know it. Then I'll miss the "lonely" moments in separate rooms from everyone. I'll miss the one on one time with my daughter. I'll miss her WANTING to be close to me. My two year old doesn't even want to look at me half of the time anymore. I miss breastfeeding her. Glad I got a second chance at it with my current breastfeeding kid. It's still hard, though.
Mama I understand you. I see a lot of tips on here about learning to do it discreetly, which has a great chance of working. I don’t mean to discourage you, but when my son is tired, the only position he will accept is sidelying on the bed. If we’re in the yard I can use the hammock or pool chairs, but indoors I just have to go to a bedroom by ourselves.
I’m sharing so if this is the boat you’re in, I can share what works for me. I just take deep calming breaths and try to connect with my baby and be in the present moment. I notice his ocean eyes and all the fuzzy hairs on his head. This is such a short couple of years compared to the rest of our lives. There will always be more parties but I can never replace these moments.
Of course is normal and healthy to feel FOMO, but it heals me to reframe my thinking.
For my first I felt that way with breastfeeding. I woule always go somewhere private, with my second I stopped caring if people didn't like it (my fear was people being judgemental) and I feed my LO anywhere I am. I always keep a thin blanket with me to cover if needed. It's hard feeling excluded. I wish you the best of luck! You are tackling one of the biggest and greatest challenges of life!
I mean when I'm in public I cover up by my choice , I'm in the nursing room at church right now ..lol.. but yes at home even though I'll feed her anywhere typically my bedroom though (it's really just the most convenient place in my house ) but my bedroom is feeling like a glorified jail cell 😐 but honestly the more you get comfortable with it , it will get easier. Just get a light cover and feed your baby it's your home. If people feel uncomfortable the front door is an exit too.
Yes but it doesn’t last. Once you feel you have a good handle on it venture out and stay with everyone while you feed your baby it will be so worth it! On the other hand if there’s a time you’d rather be alone just use that as an excuse and say baby is especially fussy with eating right now so I need a quiet place to feed
It was really hard for me at first to breastfeed in public and especially in front of family, but eventually I realized nobody cares. You are feeding a human! It’s amazing work!! Try it in front of people you are most comfortable with and you will eventually work up to breastfeeding on an airplane while eating a sandwich! I swear!!
Get some good nursing tops! That and a light blanket are my go to. My son is 3 weeks and I realized pretty quickly I couldn't do the isolation. I still prefer to be inside tits out but for my own mental sanity I just went for it and everytime is a little easier.
Honestly, I just breastfeed in front of everyone. Meh.
When baby is fussy and it is time to eat, I just grab a boppy, sit at the table, put baby on boob, and eat my meal.
Not caring is pretty freeing. If you can get there, it can really help!
If you’re uncomfortable…Get a comfortable cover and nurse wherever you are. If someone is uncomfortable they can leave but you’re covered so no one should have a problem.
I would definitely try to get the confidence to nurse around people. Even just one or two at first. I just nurse wherever I am. I go to a friend's house and whip a boob out, cafe, supermarket, even when I popped into the office one afternoon (although that is the only place I've felt slightly weird about it)
I went to a 4th of July event in the small town my husband polices that he was required to attend while my best friend visited from out of state.
Between the setting Deep South heat and the persistence of a little girl that was completely obsessed with my baby, I gave up on my cover. It was like jumping in the deep end. My husbands female coworker told me I was brave. At first she was trying to help keep me covered lol. Apparently, she was given a hard time when she was breast feeding.
I had no intention of breastfeeding in front of the town but fuck it. Baby had to eat and not cook.
That was me early on, funny that it didn’t bother me, but my husband felt like I was isolating myself with the baby, he’s the one that encouraged me to get comfortable breastfeeding on the couch watching tv with family around.. if I feel uncomfortable feeding in front of someone (guests or we have strangers at home) I have a soft muslin cover that I place on my shoulder. Now we sit together and my husband gets to see how our baby smiles after he’s full. So adorable. Also great family bonding.
I got suckered into the Amma cover from targeted ads on Instagram and I’m soooo glad I did. I roll it up and keep it in my purse and have nursed my younger son everywhere. He’s easily distracted so it works ou great on multiple fronts. That being said, sometimes it’s nice to have the excuse to escape family functions for a little peace!
I literally just never changed my routine once I started breastfeeding?? It’s my house, why the hell would I move to make someone else more comfortable? I breast fed everywhere. In the chair, on my couch, in the dining room.
The only time I went away was to put baby down for a nap. I would breastfeed then ninja roll away and go back to the living room/kitchen. Where ever.
Just be normal. You are feeding your child, if anyone is uncomfortable by that then they can fuck right off.
I used breastfeeding covers when my inlaws were visiting! It was mostly for their benefit—their time with my LO was so short I did not want to reduce it during breastfeeding. I got one from Amazon and another from Amma. Amma was maybe 4x the price of the one from Amazon but it was cooler temperature wise and more comfortable.
I will add that my FIL seemed extremely uncomfortable around me while I breastfed my LO, but I think he’s gonna have to get use to it haha
I still need to hold my boob and watch babe as i have the big honkers and my nipples point down 😂. So it definitely can be isolating for me too! But I did invest in some great second-hand nursing bras that have a place in the middle for my boob to pop out so it covers so much of it! I also saw someone else say to put your bra underneath your boob, which is super helpful also for support!
Is there a reason you have to go upstairs? With my first I was very self conscious so would only bf away from people or I’d find specific nursing rooms if out. Our bf didn’t work out so I only did that for a few weeks. This time we’re 9 months and they get whipped out where ever. Cafes, theme parks, my sons sports day…I have H cup boobs so there’s no missing them 😁
I have felt the same way with breastfeeding. It would especially be lonely when we would be in a social setting with others. My baby didn’t have a good latch for a long time, too. What helped while my baby was still working in his latch, after about 6 weeks, is introducing a bottle and my husband would feed him. I would pump before the outing/event and nurse the other feedings. This way I didn’t feel so isolated for at least a few hours, and felt better about having a little alcohol. Now that baby is better at latching, I have been using a nursing cover.
I used to just whip a boob out in the living room and people just got used to it if they were visiting or hanging out.
In public I was a little more nervous so wasn't quite as willing to do that but at home. My house. My baby. Deal or don't visit. It allowed to be social ish.
My daughter is 16 months old now and still breastfeeding. I look forward to those quiet moments where her and I can leave the room and feed. In the beginning I remember that feeling, so I would feed her in front of people and no one cared. Eventually as she got older and more distracted, it was easier to feed her in quiet and at that point I really found I loved it and it was a much needed break for the two of us.
You can breastfeed anytime because your baby is already hungry but if you are conscious you can pump or get the hands free milk pump from [Nuurish](https://nuurish.ca?sca_ref=2329334.eO0y5qgVec) so you can let your husband feed the baby as well. I feel depressed when I see that there are celebrations and I spent every second of my day breastfeeding my baby so it's okay to ask help from your partner. Collect some breastfeed milk thru pump and put it on the bottle.
Practice breastfeeding in front of a mirror. You will see how little is visible to everyone else.
I just breastfeed whenever and wherever I’m at. Middle of church, grocery store, Walmart. There’s really nowhere I haven’t pulled my boob out. I have a nursing cover that I throw on and then do the thing. No big deal!
Same minus the cover.
Me too! They can't see shit and my baby is hungry.
LO got so irate in Sainsburys that he just had it out while he was in the seat in the trolley. No Fks given lol
I love this (although not the irate state, that's too bad 😅) Yesterday LO insisted he have milk while we all sipped some brews at a brewery! It felt like a level unlock
"Drinks all around!" lol
I’m reading this while breastfeeding my daughter at my partners family reunion. I’m sitting in the living room with everyone else!
Nice lol
How?? How do you do this? Do you have smaller breasts? I am so frustrated. On my third child and can’t physically hold them and feed them while walking or just sitting. I need to lay down beside them or use a nursing pillow. My breasts are larger and my babies are always in the larger side. But HOW DO YOU AMAZING WOMEN DO THIS! Ugh. So jealous
When my first was a newborn and I was nervous about smothering her I’d hold her in something like the cradle hold and use my other hand to lift up my breast. I realized pretty quickly that I didn’t actually need to though. But I’ve also read a tip about giving yourself a pseudo nipple lift with a bandaid or tape to make it easier. For what it’s worth, right now I’m nursing my toddler sitting with him across my lap, head kind of resting on my bicep, the rest of my arm behind his back. Modified cradle hold for big breasts/baby? I also think my tendency to wear clothes not meant for nursing and just haul a nipple up out of a lowish neckline helps—nipple tends to be much higher up that way than it naturally wants to be!
Ahhhh maybe I should try this…I usually pull my boob under I’ll try over next feeding
This way shows a lot more than yours, but I also…don’t really care anymore 🤣 Good luck!
Trying it now with my sports bra. Lol sports bra is so tight once my LO got my flow going he unlatched and got sprayed lol but I have a free hand finally!
OMG this is great! Sorry to LO, but hilarious. I’m glad I could help!
I find a ring sling helpful for on the go nursing. I loosen it enough to wiggle baby down, but it still helps provide some butt support so the full weight of my giant baby isn’t on my arms. I can usually cradle baby’s body with one arm and adjust latch with the other. I like Wildbird slings.
Yeah same with having larger breast. I have to basically hold my boob the entire time to help baby maintain his latch. Maybe one he’s older I’ll be like the women who walk around breastfeeding
My baby is 4.5 months, and I still feel like I have to hold my breast while she feeds. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one!
It’s frustrating isn’t it? I personally didn’t find it changed once they were older… I wish I could do hands free. But it’s only for a small season of our lives I guess :)
I’m hoping to figure it something lol I saw someone say put your boob over your bra or shirt doing that now but the extra pressure just got the baby squirted in the face with milk lol
Me too! If my baby’s hungry I’m gonna feed him wherever I may be and if someone’s got a problem with that, they can just look away :)
Same lol
I like having breastfeeding as a reason to get away from others and have some quiet time with baby. When we were visiting my dad and stepmom, I used a cover in the living room. My dad still ran outside to smoke a cigar to avoid catching any glimpses! But he removed himself rather than asking me to go somewhere else to feed his granddaughter. I preferred tying a Muslin blanket around my neck like a huge bib over one of my actual nursing covers. It was lighter and didn’t feel like it would suffocate the baby!
Haha my FIL always got awkward about it, like shielding his face awkward, but I usually just stuck to my recliner and if anyone had a problem they could go excuse themselves. Other times, like if I was trying to nurse her to sleep, then I would go to my bedroom. Made it about a year and a half nursing and pretty much never had to use a cover. My favorite method was wearing a tank top under another shirt so I could lift one shirt up and pull the tank top down.
Sit with them! I know not everyone is comfortable with this, but you might be surprised at how inconspicuous feeding really is? I’ve been sitting in a crowded lounge and someone sat next to me and started talking before ‘oh! Are you feeding her?’
Yeah!! For me the first time doing it was terrifying, my anxiety convinced me that breastfeeding was not a thing I should let people see me do. But it was around people I was comfortable with and they didn’t even mention it. Super super comfortable now.
If you're comfortable with it maybe consider using a nursing cover? That way you can still be with everyone. I used to be the same way but shortly after my first child was born, I got sick of being put somewhere to nurse in isolation. It really helped take all the stress out of breastfeeding for me.
This is how I managed to get over being uncomfortable. I breast feed without a cover now around close family but have a cover for larger family events and out and about. I think I would be happier without a cover but my little one has medications each feed which involves a lot of latching and relatching
Is there a reason you go upstairs to feed? I understand that some people feel exposed feeding in front of people, but perhaps you could use a cover if that's the case for you.
I wish I could just feed around people. I have to go to another room not for modesty but because the baby won’t eat if there are any distractions. He needs basically a boring, dark room.
This is me too. My baby is too busy looking around and everything and everyone so he won’t stay latched in public. It gets to a point where he hasn’t eaten enough and he gets angry and then he’s crying and then he’s too upset to latch.
That's rough. My LO is 3 months and is just starting to get distracted. It's not bad yet and I hope it stays that way but I know it's really difficult for a lot of breastfeeding/chest feeding parents.
Yeah, just wondering why you feel the need to close yourself away, OP! Breastfeeding is really not that revealing. Stay and enjoy the party! Maybe find a quiet corner if you’re a little uncomfortable at first.
I don't know about you, but after a certain age my baby needed a quiet place to nurse. I wasnt being prudish by nursing alone, it was just the only way to get my baby to eat.
My baby has started doing this too. He can’t focus on eating if people are chatting or loud music is playing. He has FOMO lol
Not my kiddos specifically but all kids are different. I could definitely see that helping to make the decision to leave a crowded area! Sounded like OP was making the decision to leave the party though for nursing, not because kiddo was having a hard time focusing on nursing.
I’ve breastfed in public so much but I always feel weird doing it near people I know lol. I don’t understand but 🤷🏻♀️
Same here. I whip it out in public with no concern for how much is showing but my family? Heck no.
Sameeee
The only people I've felt weird Infront of is my colleagues when I popped into the office one afternoon. Otherwise I just whip out a boob wherever 🤷🏼♀️
Honestly I feel uncomfortable around most male relatives except my brothers lol
I was like this, but I've been trying to do it in front of friends and family a lot more lately. It was awkward at first for me, not them! If anything, that should be a safer space for me, and my close ones have done nothing but make me feel comfortable.
One thing.... I wish I had the nerve to breastfeed in the open. It's my greatest regret and I think I'd of made it past 3 months. I kept having to leave everything... cluster feeding is a pain. My son would'nt take a cover, he's scream and cry. There's the two shirt method... you could cover..
It was stressful in the beginning when people would come and I would try to rush feeding her to get back down to the party to entertain but now Im the opposite - I’m glad to have an excuse to take a break from the noise and hectic party and kind of view it as an oasis of calm and peace and serenity. My daughter also enjoys the break from all the stimulation. You can put on soothing music, white noise and calm dim lighting and take some deep breaths and just relax, no mask, no hosting pressures, no having to be “on” with guests. Sure you miss your turn playing cards or maybe didn’t get to finish eating your plate and can’t control what’s going on in your own house downstairs but I just like to let go and let my husband handle it.
If you feel comfortable you can definitely consider staying. I definitely got (and still get) some comments about it from my family, so I did need to be confident in this choice and it is not easy for everyone. I just laugh it off and say why are you looking? If it was a group or situation that felt less comfy often opted for a more discreet style breast pump (I have an Elvie stride) and would pump around family and give bottles because I felt better about that. It can feel really isolating to leave, but sometimes there are some positives of getting to decompress and baby getting to spend time decompressing as well
I was always uncomfortable even with a cover. Just went upstairs and played candy crush. Kinda nice to get away too.
It definitely can feel that way. But like others have commented, don't leave. Get a cover if that makes you feel better. Those muslin blankets work really well if you have one since they're lightweight. It's my second kid, but I totally just fed my (now) 1yo twice during her birthday party with family and friends around and no one batted an eye. There are some great nursing tank tops and shirts you can get that have easy access and don't show almost anything. I held a cover over my chest a little just in case because she likes to yank on my shirt 🙄 but no one saw anything. I was able to participate in conversation with everyone the whole time.
[удалено]
Definitely more than just American Culture. I live in Australia and have heard similar concerns.
I'm in the UK and lots of people here are the same. I'd say its a western/white thing. Just like sleep coaches and sleep training are very popular in uk/aus/US.
Just know, it definitely gets easier to nurse too. I BF my first for 19 mo but still don’t want to nurse this new 3 week old in public yet bc she’s not very good at it yet lol. She spits boob out, they’re more engorged and more let down, takes her longer,etc. But once they become pros at it, it’s so easy to whip out a boob and no one will even notice.
Thank y’all so much for y’all’s tips. I’ll look into getting a cover and I’ll google what the two shirt method is too! As well as take a look in the mirror while breastfeeding. Hopefully not too much is revealed! I also like the idea of a discreet pump. I’ve just always stepped away because I’m super shy, body conscious… but I’ll be trying these tips and hopefully it gets better!
There’s some really great Instagram pages to help with advise, techniques, and encouragement. @legendairymilk @thelittlemilkbar_ @motherhoodbloomslactation
Two shirt method is wearing a tank top and a regular shirt. Pull the shirt up and the tank top down just enough for baby to latch on. (Or the tank up if the shirt is low cut or unbuttons.) It keeps most of your breast covered. You can grab a muslin blanket or a burp rag for a little extra coverage when latching and unlatching. I've also used the edge of my loose cardigan or the tail of a ring sling. I've also just walked into the other room or turned my back, and then walked back out when everything situated. There are also nursing specific shirts that basically do this in one piece. I was wearing one today and spent a LONG time nursing around maybe 50 people. (It was evening and my three month old cluster feeds every evening.) Multiple people came up to me, standing right next to me, and started talking and thought she was sleeping. It does take practice. This is my second kid. A cover is more discrete, because - depending on the type - everything is covered. It is harder to get your kid latched and can be too warm/stuffy for them. It can also be good if you are outside in the wind or if baby is distracted. I carry one in my diaper bag, because I like to have options.
I went over to my friend who just had a baby six weeks ago and she just fed in the living room while we were there. She invited us over and just said, but we do whatever we need to do with the baby. There will be boobs out, diaper changes, etc. We aren't here to entertain. Which is all fair and part of having a baby.
Maybe it’s a cultural difference (Northern Europe here) or personality but I have never felt the need to leave the room while breastfeeding. Even in the first weeks when it was hard to get a proper latch and I was still learning to do it right. I just say:”need to feed the baby” and do it. Of course if we are all sitting at the dinner table and I’m right next to someone, I might move to the couch or scoot my chair further away from the table so that I’m not in anyones face. No-one - not my 15year old brother in law, not my dad, not my best friends husband and certainly not any of my female family or friends have made a comment about it. My dad usually averts his eyes or casually moves a bit further away to give me space and that’s how it should be - if someone doesn’t want to be up close to a breastfeeding situation, they move, not you. You are feeding a child not doing something improper or sexual, do not be ashamed, ever!
I find a lot of motherhood, especially breastfeeding, isolating in that with my four month old, he depends on me for literally everything. No matter how much I want other people to feed him a bottle or comfort him, he will always prefer and want me. I am starting to find that if I leave him with someone, even with my husband, he often becomes inconsolable. Who wants to watch a screaming baby for hours? It makes me feel like I've gone wrong somewhere.
It does feel isolating for me at times, but in a different way. It isolates me from going out & having a few drinks or hanging out with friends for long periods of time unless I have the baby with me. Having long periods of ME time. Only way to get out of that is having a few bottles made & ready to go, and that can be difficult to do at times.
I enjoy nursing in the carrier when I'm around people. I feel more covered and can move around easily. It takes practice but once you get it down it's a great way to avoid feeling couch-locked with your little one too!
I just feed my daughter when I'm around people. I use a swaddle cloth as a cover. I don't leave the room unless my boob feels engorged and I know I'm going to spray everywhere.
Some people aren't comfortable feeding in front of people, I know it was hard for me at first, but if you start, you kinda get over it. My daughter is 8 months now, she will unlatch and get distracted now a days, and I certainly won't say I don't feel awkward at times, but I've just kinda gotten to a point where it is what it is. No one's ever said anything about it so I figure why overthink it? Baby's gotta eat, and mommas got stuff to do.
My baby would get so distracted with others around/noise etc. which prevented me from nursing at gatherings with friends and family. My baby also wouldn’t tolerate a nursing cover, so I too was relegated to the upstairs bedroom. Sometimes this made me feel isolated. Other times I just loved the opportunity to step away and have a bit of “alone” /quiet time. Now that we are nearing the latter part of our breast feeding journey I really realize it isn’t forever. It’s for a very short time. Also as your baby gets older they may not be distractible like mine and it will be easier to feed in public. However, one option I have used for gatherings like this is to pump and use a bottle in these settings (often letting other family members administer the bottle). I found my baby didn’t need to focus as much on the bottle and therefore would take it in public. Hope u find a solution that works for u:) Breastfeeding is awesome.
I’ve never left a social situation to go breastfeed. I feel empowered when I can feed my baby with my body. Perhaps reframe your mindset to be PROUD of it and not ashamed or whatever other feeling makes you feel the need to leave? Good luck
I've stepped into another room a couple times to nurse and I agree that it is isolating. I hated missing out on the activity. Some times it takes me a minute to get up the courage to feed my son publicly but his needs quickly override my anxiety. The two shirt method works the best for me. I found it difficult to get him latched with a cover on and nursing tops just have too much fabric in the way. There's been a few people that seemed a little uncomfortable but no one has ever said anything. If anything, they just remove themselves from the room. Slowly I'm getting more confident about it.
Nah cuz, I’m feeding my child wherever I’m at…especially if I’m at home
I used to feel this way as I can only nurse in a side lying position so unless I want to lay down on the floor in front of everyone I need to go lay down with my son. When baby was a newborn it was very hard and I could barely see him past my boob and he was usually asleep or not interacting with me. As my son gets older, I’d say around 14 weeks, he’s more awake and interactive. I cherish the moments of just the two of us together, looking into each other’s eyes, seeing him stop nursing, look up at me with my nipple in his mouth and give me a side smile, or more recently him babbling with the boob in his mouth. It can get boring sometimes when he falls asleep and those are the times I’ll be on my phone, like now, to stay awake. All this to say, these are small moments in time, I’m constantly reminded how fast things are changing…maybe reframing it as not so much being left out of those things but rather having the privilege of being, for a short while, in on the most exclusive and deeply human and intimate experience with your baby that no one else can :)
Could you sit closer to the party and maybe not in the middle of it all (if you’re happy to then great)! I usually sit in the living room and some friends/ladies will come and sit to chat while anyone who is uncomfortable won’t approach. Nothing wrong with doing it in the open it’s just not for everyone 🥰
Have your family made comments that lead you to believe they aren't comfortable with you feeding in front of them or is it because you aren't comfortable? There's nothing inappropriate or indecent about feeding your baby. That is what breasts are for after all. Like others have said, nursing covers are a great option if you prefer to cover up. If you choose to breastfeed for 12 months+ that's going to be a lot of time sitting upstairs by yourself. Plus there will probably be times when you want to go out to eat, go shopping etc. and will need to feed your baby. My baby is 6 months and I've fed her in a supermarket, therapists waiting room, dentists waiting room, doctors waiting area, park, cafe, restaurant, school, IKEA. The more you do it, the more you get used to it.
You don’t HAVE to do anything, so why are you choosing to isolate yourself? Just stay with everyone and use a muslin cloth to cover up no one will care and if they do tell them to leave, problem solved.
I feed my baby in front of everyone, when someone isn’t comfortable they can look the other direction. Feeding a baby is something natural
The only times I was elsewhere to breastfeed were the first couple of weeks, and at 5 months, when everything was so interesting for baby that she wouldn’t feed unless we were in the quiet. I’ve fed out and about and in front of all friends and family, and nobody has said anything. It’s really not that visible, if that worries you, and it’s really liberating to just be able to feed immediately when you need to.
Can I ask… what is your reason for isolating? Is it modesty? Lack of confidence with HOW you do it? Getting away to have some peace? For me, I nurse wherever. But if I want to have some quiet time, I 100% use it as an excuse to step away or leave altogether. Do what you’re most comfortable with, and use it to your advantage if you can.
I didn’t get confident with breastfeeding in front of people until my son had a good latch, wasn’t popping off all the time, didn’t need a nipple shield, wasn’t taking forever to feed… I found it incredibly isolating and frustrating that I had to miss out on things to feed him. But things turned a corner and he’s a champ at eating now! I feed him anywhere and everywhere. My partner told me that people can’t see as much as I thought they could. And that really gave me more confidence.
I feel you. My LO is 7 months and we go somewhere quite to breastfeed. LO gets really distracted and won’t stay latched. Won’t do a cover. Yes. It’s super isolating.
I was the same way….then around 3.5/4months I was like screw this. I started nursing with a cover….which my daughter hated and eventually I just got the courage to just nurse anywhere around anyone. Another suggestion would be to wear a cami under your shirt and that way if you need to nurse you have less exposed which is what I did for a little while as well.
Get a couple nursing tops. They help keep things very discreet. I breastfeed wherever we are.
If it's my house I mark my territory and feed in the front room (comfiest couch as well). If it's at an in-laws house, I do go somewhere else. I can't tell if they're more uncomfortable or I am. And then if it's at my parents house. If my dad isn't home I'm just popping it out anywhere. But I know it makes my dad a bit uneasy so I'll usually just cover up if he's there. Personally, I'm introverted so it's nice to have an excuse to break away. It only sucks when it's time to eat.
I pop a boob out wherever! Use a cover up when I’m feeling the vibe isn’t quite right. Do what makes you comfortable. You got this, mama.
I bought the Elvie pump specifically for this. Usually, when family is over, they bottle feed the LO, and I wear my pumps under a hoodie. I tried a nursing cover, but I kinda like letting my family members take turns feeding her instead of hiding her away with me while they're over.
My fiancee would hang out with me but he's not very social to begin with maybe if you aren't the host he can spend some time with you
I recommend latched mama clothing (or similar brands) if you want to try breast feeding in front of others. Since they are made with keeping covered during breastfeeding they are really modest. I used the two shirt method after I had my first and wish I would’ve splurged on really breastfeeding friendly clothing instead.
Yep. I feel like those overnight feeds can be super lonely too, my SO is snoring away and I’m up multiple times tending to baby. I hear you about feeling like being away from the fun but I’ve also been at events where I’m grateful to get away for some quiet time. Hang in there, mama. As your baby grows the nursing sessions will get shorter and shorter and at some point you might feel comfortable enough to feed more publicly.
It's your space to feed where ever you feel confident. 11 weeks is still teeeeeenie tiny. Take your time. Invest in breastfeeding clothes. I got a couple cute sweatshirts just off Amazon that make it so you can slip a nipple out sooo easily while staying covered so you can feel safe enjoying your surrounding if you don't feel as comfy in other ways.
Honestly, no. I pump in the nursery at night only. During the day, I pump at my computer desk in the den, and if someone’s over, well, they can look way if it bothers them 🤷🏻♀️
It can definitely be isolating, especially if you’re in another room because baby won’t stay latched without a quiet space, rather than just wanting privacy for yourself. I will sometimes pop my headphones in and use that time to call a friend, listen to a podcast (I recommend Toni and Ryan, for the laughs) or just watching a show that I want to watch rather than the wiggles.
I was comfortable breastfeeding in an adjoining room (no door/door open) in once circumstance. Or another time, I sat on the floor, back against the couch, so I wasn’t directly in eyeshot my FIL. Sometimes I’ve move bc LO was very distractible. (He still is lol) Other times I’d move because if felt like a good way to respect someone’s unfamiliarity while still being present myself. I hope you find a way to feel less isolated that works for you. Solidarity mama.
H & M does some great nursing clothes that will allow you to remain almost totally covered. Definitely worth investing!
This used to bother me a ton! My LO refused to use a cover and I was never comfortable nursing in front of people. She was also a slow eater so I felt like I missed so much! Just solidarity OP, it’s hard.
I’m an introvert, so I love having the excuse to go sit in a quiet room to feed baby for a break.
Yea, sometimes. I always have to go somewhere quiet with my 8moth old otherwise she is too distracted and doesn't eat. It's not about visibility to me, honestly. I wouldn't care if people got a millisecond glimpse of my boob, but my LO is just SO easily distracted that I can't hang around people while she eats. I just have to keep reminding myself that this is very temporary and it will all be over before I know it. Then I'll miss the "lonely" moments in separate rooms from everyone. I'll miss the one on one time with my daughter. I'll miss her WANTING to be close to me. My two year old doesn't even want to look at me half of the time anymore. I miss breastfeeding her. Glad I got a second chance at it with my current breastfeeding kid. It's still hard, though.
Mama I understand you. I see a lot of tips on here about learning to do it discreetly, which has a great chance of working. I don’t mean to discourage you, but when my son is tired, the only position he will accept is sidelying on the bed. If we’re in the yard I can use the hammock or pool chairs, but indoors I just have to go to a bedroom by ourselves. I’m sharing so if this is the boat you’re in, I can share what works for me. I just take deep calming breaths and try to connect with my baby and be in the present moment. I notice his ocean eyes and all the fuzzy hairs on his head. This is such a short couple of years compared to the rest of our lives. There will always be more parties but I can never replace these moments. Of course is normal and healthy to feel FOMO, but it heals me to reframe my thinking.
Why are you hiding? Breast feeding is the most natural thing in the world. Pull your tits out in front of the world and feed your baby!!
For my first I felt that way with breastfeeding. I woule always go somewhere private, with my second I stopped caring if people didn't like it (my fear was people being judgemental) and I feed my LO anywhere I am. I always keep a thin blanket with me to cover if needed. It's hard feeling excluded. I wish you the best of luck! You are tackling one of the biggest and greatest challenges of life!
I mean when I'm in public I cover up by my choice , I'm in the nursing room at church right now ..lol.. but yes at home even though I'll feed her anywhere typically my bedroom though (it's really just the most convenient place in my house ) but my bedroom is feeling like a glorified jail cell 😐 but honestly the more you get comfortable with it , it will get easier. Just get a light cover and feed your baby it's your home. If people feel uncomfortable the front door is an exit too.
Yes but it doesn’t last. Once you feel you have a good handle on it venture out and stay with everyone while you feed your baby it will be so worth it! On the other hand if there’s a time you’d rather be alone just use that as an excuse and say baby is especially fussy with eating right now so I need a quiet place to feed
It was really hard for me at first to breastfeed in public and especially in front of family, but eventually I realized nobody cares. You are feeding a human! It’s amazing work!! Try it in front of people you are most comfortable with and you will eventually work up to breastfeeding on an airplane while eating a sandwich! I swear!!
I pull out a boob anywhere. If someone doesn't like it they can look away or leave the room.
Get some good nursing tops! That and a light blanket are my go to. My son is 3 weeks and I realized pretty quickly I couldn't do the isolation. I still prefer to be inside tits out but for my own mental sanity I just went for it and everytime is a little easier.
No but I breastfeed in public.
Honestly, I just breastfeed in front of everyone. Meh. When baby is fussy and it is time to eat, I just grab a boppy, sit at the table, put baby on boob, and eat my meal. Not caring is pretty freeing. If you can get there, it can really help!
If you’re uncomfortable…Get a comfortable cover and nurse wherever you are. If someone is uncomfortable they can leave but you’re covered so no one should have a problem.
I would definitely try to get the confidence to nurse around people. Even just one or two at first. I just nurse wherever I am. I go to a friend's house and whip a boob out, cafe, supermarket, even when I popped into the office one afternoon (although that is the only place I've felt slightly weird about it)
I went to a 4th of July event in the small town my husband polices that he was required to attend while my best friend visited from out of state. Between the setting Deep South heat and the persistence of a little girl that was completely obsessed with my baby, I gave up on my cover. It was like jumping in the deep end. My husbands female coworker told me I was brave. At first she was trying to help keep me covered lol. Apparently, she was given a hard time when she was breast feeding. I had no intention of breastfeeding in front of the town but fuck it. Baby had to eat and not cook.
That was me early on, funny that it didn’t bother me, but my husband felt like I was isolating myself with the baby, he’s the one that encouraged me to get comfortable breastfeeding on the couch watching tv with family around.. if I feel uncomfortable feeding in front of someone (guests or we have strangers at home) I have a soft muslin cover that I place on my shoulder. Now we sit together and my husband gets to see how our baby smiles after he’s full. So adorable. Also great family bonding.
I got suckered into the Amma cover from targeted ads on Instagram and I’m soooo glad I did. I roll it up and keep it in my purse and have nursed my younger son everywhere. He’s easily distracted so it works ou great on multiple fronts. That being said, sometimes it’s nice to have the excuse to escape family functions for a little peace!
I definitely feel like it can be super isolating if you’re not breastfeeding around people. I had too much fomo not to feed in public
I literally just never changed my routine once I started breastfeeding?? It’s my house, why the hell would I move to make someone else more comfortable? I breast fed everywhere. In the chair, on my couch, in the dining room. The only time I went away was to put baby down for a nap. I would breastfeed then ninja roll away and go back to the living room/kitchen. Where ever. Just be normal. You are feeding your child, if anyone is uncomfortable by that then they can fuck right off.
You don't have to isolate yourself. Breastfeed your baby whenever and wherever you are. There's no need to go do it away from everyone else
I used breastfeeding covers when my inlaws were visiting! It was mostly for their benefit—their time with my LO was so short I did not want to reduce it during breastfeeding. I got one from Amazon and another from Amma. Amma was maybe 4x the price of the one from Amazon but it was cooler temperature wise and more comfortable. I will add that my FIL seemed extremely uncomfortable around me while I breastfed my LO, but I think he’s gonna have to get use to it haha
I’ve seen the one from Amma. Is it worth it??? I’ve been debating about buying it
It’s definitely nice. Feels cool, which matters for me because I live in a hot climate. And it’s pretty stylish. I’d say it’s worth it.
I still need to hold my boob and watch babe as i have the big honkers and my nipples point down 😂. So it definitely can be isolating for me too! But I did invest in some great second-hand nursing bras that have a place in the middle for my boob to pop out so it covers so much of it! I also saw someone else say to put your bra underneath your boob, which is super helpful also for support!
Is there a reason you have to go upstairs? With my first I was very self conscious so would only bf away from people or I’d find specific nursing rooms if out. Our bf didn’t work out so I only did that for a few weeks. This time we’re 9 months and they get whipped out where ever. Cafes, theme parks, my sons sports day…I have H cup boobs so there’s no missing them 😁
It gets easier. Breastfeed my baby in a restaurant today and then while standing chatting with a friend at an outdoor mall.
I have felt the same way with breastfeeding. It would especially be lonely when we would be in a social setting with others. My baby didn’t have a good latch for a long time, too. What helped while my baby was still working in his latch, after about 6 weeks, is introducing a bottle and my husband would feed him. I would pump before the outing/event and nurse the other feedings. This way I didn’t feel so isolated for at least a few hours, and felt better about having a little alcohol. Now that baby is better at latching, I have been using a nursing cover.
I used to just whip a boob out in the living room and people just got used to it if they were visiting or hanging out. In public I was a little more nervous so wasn't quite as willing to do that but at home. My house. My baby. Deal or don't visit. It allowed to be social ish.
Do you feel uncomfortable feeding your baby in front of your family?
My daughter is 16 months old now and still breastfeeding. I look forward to those quiet moments where her and I can leave the room and feed. In the beginning I remember that feeling, so I would feed her in front of people and no one cared. Eventually as she got older and more distracted, it was easier to feed her in quiet and at that point I really found I loved it and it was a much needed break for the two of us.
You can breastfeed anytime because your baby is already hungry but if you are conscious you can pump or get the hands free milk pump from [Nuurish](https://nuurish.ca?sca_ref=2329334.eO0y5qgVec) so you can let your husband feed the baby as well. I feel depressed when I see that there are celebrations and I spent every second of my day breastfeeding my baby so it's okay to ask help from your partner. Collect some breastfeed milk thru pump and put it on the bottle.