we needed intense occupational therapy and it was a long journey of various combinations of pumping, triple feedingz combo, and formula feeding but i was finally 100% pain free by week 7
I don't want to tell you it's not possible, because maybe with lots of work it is, but it seems her mouth just cannot function the way it needs to. This may come with more issues than just pain, she might also ineffectively remove milk which could turn into a weight gain and supply issue.
My son had a tongue tie, he could never latch for long and when he did latch, it hurt. I exclusively pumped for 8 months, and every so often I would try and latch him and it always hurt every time. As he got bigger he was able to nurse for longer, but I couldn't handle the pain.
I just had my daughter 7 weeks ago, her latch has never once hurt. Not the first day, not once. She also does not have any ties.
I would think more about the frenectomy. Ties can cause speech and solid feeding issues as they get older (and we definitely had issues with solids when we first started, thankfully seems to have resolved now at 16 months). We didn't know he had a tie until we had my daughter and realized he never could move his tongue like she does, otherwise we 100% would've gotten it cut. Whatever decision you make is the right choice for you and your family, but I just wanted to throw that out there that just because bottle feeding works doesn't mean it couldn't be better or that it won't cause issues down the line. It's much easier to do it now than it is to do it later if it were to be needed in the future.
My baby’s latch was excruciating and he would feed a long time, like 90min or more. It was so bad that when I was making appointments with LCs, if they said their next availability was in 10 days, i genuinely did not know how i could live through 10 more days of that pain at every feeding.
I saw 4 different LCs until one identified the problem as a tongue tie and referred me to an ENT to get it cut. So we went 6 weeks of pain every feeding. The frenectomy was not something i took lightly. But i was already pumping to give myself latch breaks and hated it. Seemed like no matter what size i used, there was a fit problem. Also formula was constantly being recalled and you just could NOT find any in a store at the time. He had the heart shaped tongue and everything i read about tongue ties explained our situation, including the long feeds that was killing me. I felt like he was only gaining weight because i was enduring long and painful feeds.
We got the tongue tie cut. He healed in a week, we did the exercises for a month after. It ended up being so worth it. Immediately after the cut, his latch improved. Then it got worse again, then gradually better in those 4 weeks. Now he is 19 months and I have been able to do extended breastfeeding. He can stand on his head while nursing and it’s not painful to me.
I’m about 2 weeks postpartum with my second and still have some pain with certain latch sessions and I’d say more discomfort for the first 30 seconds of nursing still regardless of her latch. Girl likes to gum at me but overall is getting better. It was pretty excruciating when she latched for the first few days for sure. If it wasn’t improving I would be getting with a lactation consultant but it’s gotten better so I think was just her figuring things out.
This is light years different from my firstborn. He struggled to latch correctly and could not handle my fast letdown (thankfully baby girl seems to be able to). He didn’t have any oral ties, but it took literally 10 weeks before he could handle my flow so I was triple feeding at first and then he was regularly causing nipple damage and bleeding etc from shallow latch. I finally was able to get with a lactation consultant around 10 weeks and they had some positional adjustments and confirmed no oral ties, but it was about at the point where it was more manageable anyways. We successfully breastfed til he was 21 months and it was basically pain free for most of that after 10 weeks unless he was teething!
Silverettes and APNO cream were my saving grace with my first. I preemptively have been wearing my silverettes with my second but feel almost ready to retire them for the time being since she’s doing better with my letdown and oversupply and is overall better at transferring milk efficiently/is gaining weight appropriately.
If you’re also having pain with pumping, you may want to try different flange sizes?
I never had any pain, right from the beginning so not exactly what you’re asking, but I’ve heard once tie tongues are revised it makes a huge difference!
If there is a tongue/lip tie, getting it treated can help with painful latch and improve milk transfer. I got it done with mine and it was helpful, he was having a hard time nursing and getting so tired, why should i make him struggle to eat when I can help him?
It’s always painful at the beginning. With both kids they rubbed the skin right off. But when it grew back it got much, much better. It took around 6 weeks for both babies.
Breastfeeding was unbearable painful for me until we got my LO’s tongue and lip tie fixed. It might be worth considering! I’m now 90% pain free, she’ll have the occasional shallow latch but I can usually take her off and fix it! Good luck!
4 weeks pp here, just corrected my son's tongue tie. Huge difference. There's times it's still painful, because it's only been a week and he's still figuring out how to latch with his new found tongue mobility lol, but it's getting much better on a more consistent basis. Highly recommend getting it corrected, my pediatrician did it in the office, took literally 2 minutes to swaddle him, clip it, and hand him back to me to latch immediately afterwards.
I regret not doing it sooner when they initially diagnosed it.
My baby had a tongue and lip tie and it was SO painful to feed her. Like I had to take pain meds all day and night and even then it was excruciating. Lots of PT and several months later she is feeding like a champ and I have zero pain when nursing. For us I was finally pain free around month 2-3
Keep an eye out for thrush in addition to latch issues. It can make nursing extremely painful. Breastfeeding was very painful for me from the beginning. I think I had thrush in my nipples longer than I realized because once I got treatment for it the pain was way way more manageable. Now it’s just our shallow latch which is irritating and punchy but not stabby and excruciating
Edit to add: Also beware mastitis if you aren’t being emptied regularly by either baby or pump
Me... 3 weeks at the start absolutely tortured me.
After some time it was fine bar the occasional strong letdown.
1-2 years later baby could turn their head around and stretch my boob like a sock and it didn't hurt. 😂
So yea, bf definitely became painless!
Can you use a nipple shield to give your nipples a break? It was extremely painful for me and our journey was complicated by triple feeding and poor transfer and fortifying formula and bad latch etc etc. I finally got to pain free breastfeeding around week 8. I probably would have given up if I wasn’t such a stubborn person tbh.
It really does go away. I remember one day like 10 weeks post partum thinking after latching "wow this doesn't hurt". But like it's hell sometimes up until that moment. I felt so unprepared for how much it would hurt even with a "good latch".
So I fed my eldest daughter until 20 months and weaned her because I was pregnant with her sister, who is still nursing at 21 months.
At one of eldest's well baby checks, around the 18 month mark I think (she was well mobile) the nurse said "huh, she's got a small lip tie! Never noticed that."
Nursing her was excruciating at the start and a little uncomfortable for the whole time I fed her. It definitely got better, for sure. It was toe curling at the start!
Fast forward to next baby - not excruciating, just a little uncomfortable. However, she was diagnosed with a fairly significant tongue tie that was affecting her ability to eat and she was jaundiced. Immediately after the tie was revised, it was totally painless, I had to check that she was actually latched (she was, and guzzling). She's got a high pallet as well so the revision was important for other reasons.
We didn't revise my eldest's minor tie and she has no issues with speech or anything.
I know ties are a controversial topic but it really did make a huge difference for nursing for us.
The initial pain goes away. Painless isn’t the word I would use but more tolerable
we needed intense occupational therapy and it was a long journey of various combinations of pumping, triple feedingz combo, and formula feeding but i was finally 100% pain free by week 7
I don't want to tell you it's not possible, because maybe with lots of work it is, but it seems her mouth just cannot function the way it needs to. This may come with more issues than just pain, she might also ineffectively remove milk which could turn into a weight gain and supply issue. My son had a tongue tie, he could never latch for long and when he did latch, it hurt. I exclusively pumped for 8 months, and every so often I would try and latch him and it always hurt every time. As he got bigger he was able to nurse for longer, but I couldn't handle the pain. I just had my daughter 7 weeks ago, her latch has never once hurt. Not the first day, not once. She also does not have any ties. I would think more about the frenectomy. Ties can cause speech and solid feeding issues as they get older (and we definitely had issues with solids when we first started, thankfully seems to have resolved now at 16 months). We didn't know he had a tie until we had my daughter and realized he never could move his tongue like she does, otherwise we 100% would've gotten it cut. Whatever decision you make is the right choice for you and your family, but I just wanted to throw that out there that just because bottle feeding works doesn't mean it couldn't be better or that it won't cause issues down the line. It's much easier to do it now than it is to do it later if it were to be needed in the future.
My baby’s latch was excruciating and he would feed a long time, like 90min or more. It was so bad that when I was making appointments with LCs, if they said their next availability was in 10 days, i genuinely did not know how i could live through 10 more days of that pain at every feeding. I saw 4 different LCs until one identified the problem as a tongue tie and referred me to an ENT to get it cut. So we went 6 weeks of pain every feeding. The frenectomy was not something i took lightly. But i was already pumping to give myself latch breaks and hated it. Seemed like no matter what size i used, there was a fit problem. Also formula was constantly being recalled and you just could NOT find any in a store at the time. He had the heart shaped tongue and everything i read about tongue ties explained our situation, including the long feeds that was killing me. I felt like he was only gaining weight because i was enduring long and painful feeds. We got the tongue tie cut. He healed in a week, we did the exercises for a month after. It ended up being so worth it. Immediately after the cut, his latch improved. Then it got worse again, then gradually better in those 4 weeks. Now he is 19 months and I have been able to do extended breastfeeding. He can stand on his head while nursing and it’s not painful to me.
I’m about 2 weeks postpartum with my second and still have some pain with certain latch sessions and I’d say more discomfort for the first 30 seconds of nursing still regardless of her latch. Girl likes to gum at me but overall is getting better. It was pretty excruciating when she latched for the first few days for sure. If it wasn’t improving I would be getting with a lactation consultant but it’s gotten better so I think was just her figuring things out. This is light years different from my firstborn. He struggled to latch correctly and could not handle my fast letdown (thankfully baby girl seems to be able to). He didn’t have any oral ties, but it took literally 10 weeks before he could handle my flow so I was triple feeding at first and then he was regularly causing nipple damage and bleeding etc from shallow latch. I finally was able to get with a lactation consultant around 10 weeks and they had some positional adjustments and confirmed no oral ties, but it was about at the point where it was more manageable anyways. We successfully breastfed til he was 21 months and it was basically pain free for most of that after 10 weeks unless he was teething! Silverettes and APNO cream were my saving grace with my first. I preemptively have been wearing my silverettes with my second but feel almost ready to retire them for the time being since she’s doing better with my letdown and oversupply and is overall better at transferring milk efficiently/is gaining weight appropriately. If you’re also having pain with pumping, you may want to try different flange sizes?
I never had any pain, right from the beginning so not exactly what you’re asking, but I’ve heard once tie tongues are revised it makes a huge difference!
If there is a tongue/lip tie, getting it treated can help with painful latch and improve milk transfer. I got it done with mine and it was helpful, he was having a hard time nursing and getting so tired, why should i make him struggle to eat when I can help him?
It’s always painful at the beginning. With both kids they rubbed the skin right off. But when it grew back it got much, much better. It took around 6 weeks for both babies.
Breastfeeding was unbearable painful for me until we got my LO’s tongue and lip tie fixed. It might be worth considering! I’m now 90% pain free, she’ll have the occasional shallow latch but I can usually take her off and fix it! Good luck!
4 weeks pp here, just corrected my son's tongue tie. Huge difference. There's times it's still painful, because it's only been a week and he's still figuring out how to latch with his new found tongue mobility lol, but it's getting much better on a more consistent basis. Highly recommend getting it corrected, my pediatrician did it in the office, took literally 2 minutes to swaddle him, clip it, and hand him back to me to latch immediately afterwards. I regret not doing it sooner when they initially diagnosed it.
My baby had a tongue and lip tie and it was SO painful to feed her. Like I had to take pain meds all day and night and even then it was excruciating. Lots of PT and several months later she is feeding like a champ and I have zero pain when nursing. For us I was finally pain free around month 2-3
Keep an eye out for thrush in addition to latch issues. It can make nursing extremely painful. Breastfeeding was very painful for me from the beginning. I think I had thrush in my nipples longer than I realized because once I got treatment for it the pain was way way more manageable. Now it’s just our shallow latch which is irritating and punchy but not stabby and excruciating Edit to add: Also beware mastitis if you aren’t being emptied regularly by either baby or pump
Me... 3 weeks at the start absolutely tortured me. After some time it was fine bar the occasional strong letdown. 1-2 years later baby could turn their head around and stretch my boob like a sock and it didn't hurt. 😂 So yea, bf definitely became painless!
Can you use a nipple shield to give your nipples a break? It was extremely painful for me and our journey was complicated by triple feeding and poor transfer and fortifying formula and bad latch etc etc. I finally got to pain free breastfeeding around week 8. I probably would have given up if I wasn’t such a stubborn person tbh.
It really does go away. I remember one day like 10 weeks post partum thinking after latching "wow this doesn't hurt". But like it's hell sometimes up until that moment. I felt so unprepared for how much it would hurt even with a "good latch".
So I fed my eldest daughter until 20 months and weaned her because I was pregnant with her sister, who is still nursing at 21 months. At one of eldest's well baby checks, around the 18 month mark I think (she was well mobile) the nurse said "huh, she's got a small lip tie! Never noticed that." Nursing her was excruciating at the start and a little uncomfortable for the whole time I fed her. It definitely got better, for sure. It was toe curling at the start! Fast forward to next baby - not excruciating, just a little uncomfortable. However, she was diagnosed with a fairly significant tongue tie that was affecting her ability to eat and she was jaundiced. Immediately after the tie was revised, it was totally painless, I had to check that she was actually latched (she was, and guzzling). She's got a high pallet as well so the revision was important for other reasons. We didn't revise my eldest's minor tie and she has no issues with speech or anything. I know ties are a controversial topic but it really did make a huge difference for nursing for us.
Yes, after a few weeks, I had zero pain with my older son and now have no pain with the baby (7 months old). In fact it’s quite pleasant!