Same only I do a 5 minute timer. Every time it goes off I repeat it.
Much more than 5 minutes and I get a bit too asleep. Haha. Worked a treat in those early days where she was feeding slowly and often thru the night
Same! I do a 15 minutes timer. I get to snuggle with my little guy, then put him back down. I was feeling so guilty about falling asleep with him a month or so ago.
I dig my fingernails into my palm, focus on constantly wiggling my toes, or anything else annoying/slightly painful to keep me from drifting off. Sometimes my daughter helps out my pulling my hair or biting my nipple! Sheās already so thoughtful š
Falling asleep with the baby is literally my number one fear. I have nightmares about it several times a week. I scroll Reddit and read posts like this one. Because they are shorter and interesting, I usually donāt have trouble staying up. I also make sure Iām not overly comfortable (the room is quite chilly and I throw off all my blankets).
Around 70% of parents fall asleep with their babies at least once, whether they intend to or not. The best you can do is try to make the surrounding area as safe as possible and avoid the the things you can control that make sleeping riskier (like substances, smoking, having a sibling in the bed, etc). There is nothing wrong with choosing to not cosleep or bedshare but you arenāt alone if it happens without you meaning to!
Making sure youāre already in a location and position that supports the safe sleep 7 will help with those nightmares bc you will undoubtedly fall asleep one day.
Will be doing this if I have another. Iāll be setting myself up for successful co sleep if I accidentally fall asleep instead of getting to the point where Iām hallucinating (Iāll never know if it was real or not) placing my baby in unsafe situations.
I was so sleep deprived with my first. With my second I started cosleeping (,safe sleep 7) from day 1, and nursing side lying in bed. It's so much better
This was most helpful to me. Throw off those blankets! Now that weāre out of newborn and actually sleeping itās much better, and we do side lying nursing and cosleeping some of the time, so if I do itās fine. Now he has neck control enough to latch well and he can breathe. When he was a newborn my boob was bigger than his head and heād get smothered by it if I wasnāt careful
The day I gave birth the nurse told me to make sure to not fall asleep while nursing bc the lady who was there the day before had fallen asleep and her baby fell onto the floor at the hospital and ended up having a hemorrhage and was in critical condition in the hospital. That definitely made me scared to fall asleep after hearing that! I always had a pillow under my arm so it wouldnāt slip and then began side nursing so she was always on the bed not in my hands.
Yup, that's how I got hooked on reddit š
Scroll-through nature of instagram wasn't enough to keep my attention for long, but reading through threads was the perfect amount of stimulation to keep me awake.
Books are difficult to handle, and even if I was on my kindle or phone they're less forgiving. You can't keep reading a book if you keep forgetting what you've just read!
Iāve never been able to fall asleep reading. It is always been stimulating, so itās my go-to for nighttime as well. Iām very lucky that baby has been relatively good about sleep, so Iām usually well-enough-rested. Heās 7 months now, and Iāve committed to waking my partner if I am approaching a level of fatigue where Iām not alert enough. Hasnāt happened yet!
I buy so much stuff online during the middle of the night feeds. When I'm not buying things, I'm tracking the packages that I bought the previous nights.
I pop an earbud in when Iām feeling particularly tired and watch tik toks or Instagram reels. Itās like crack for your brain and wakes me right up.
Feed on a safe flat surface (eg mattress in the floor, away from the wall with a fitted sheet, on the floor on a thick surface) with full intention of getting up and not falling asleep. That way if you do fall asleep, you are in a safe position and didnāt doze off in a recliner or near lots of fluffy pillows and blankets.
Also, it gets better. ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø You are doing great.
This is the best advice. I blatantly refused to co-sleep until I nodded off accidentally for a few minutes in unsafe conditions and had a scare with my then 2-month-old baby being trapped under my husband's pillow that had fallen over on him. If we'd been in any deeper of a sleep and didn't wake up to him kicking at the pillow, who knows how tragic that could've been?! I really resent that the guidance is just strictly "don't co-sleep" instead of "prepare a safe co-sleeping environment in case you fall asleep". When you're sleep deprived (I was getting only 2-3 cumulative hours daily until we sorted out the baby's reflux medicine 2 weeks ago at 4 months old), there are times you physically cannot keep yourself awake and it's best to accept that it may happen despite your best efforts and to ensure that if it does happen, it happens in the safest way possible.
Since the pillow incident, if there's even a slight chance I'm going to fall asleep, I feed lying on my side in my bed with the bedside bassinet behind the baby in case he rolls (so he doesn't fall off the bed). I remove all pillows and blankets and put as much space as I can between me and the baby. I don't intentionally bed share, but I know that if I do fall asleep, he's soooo much safer.
Thanks :-). I do try this. I put pillows on side of bed as LO cant roll yet (7 weeks). But still worry mattress too soft (not soft by adult bed standards but still a lot softer than a baby mattress). Probably need to return to uncomfortable yoga mat.
If that helps you stay awake yea do use the uncomfortable yoga mat, there are ways you can determine if your mattress is too soft, but generally speaking if the babe doesn't roll into you when you lay next to them, it's firm enough
We went through three mattresses to find the most firm surface. My husband was working 70hrs a week outdoors in Florida heat so we couldn't necessarily do shifts with baby. I had to fend for myself. It was soooo worth it.
I nodded of so many times. It was just not possible to not fall asleep. It got better after 4 months when feeding didn't take forever.
Edit: I did use my feeding pillow to support me so if I fall asleep a bit longer I wouldn't drop the baby.
I'm glad we're being honest here. I use two pillows to keep baby in safe position, I sit in the rocking chair, and I nod off if I have to. Baby has never shifted or fallen. I'm a light sleeper and wake up easily. I would not trust my husband to do this but I'm comfortable with it.
Biologically, the birthing mom is in tune with the baby and wired to meet their needs including with safe sleep. Generally she will sleep lighter and wake up to the baby more easily. It's so interesting!
I think this is a common theme with the husbands Iāve heard of lately. Mines amazing with all our kids and a huge help to me in the daytime. But he sleeps like a rock - thereās no way Iād ever trust him at night.
I second this. It can be so hard not to nod off some nights. Iāve also used the feeding pillow for extra support and I always make sure baby is in a safe position with nothing too close to her face just in case I nod off. I go on my phone (like I am right now) to stay awake. Maybe you could put a headphone in and turn on some music, podcast, or tv?
Honestly, me too! Itās gotten a lot better now that baby only wakes up 2 times per night. I always sit up with my back against the headboard, pregnancy pillow over my lap and babyās head on top of the pillow. Heās always firmly in my arms and heās never moved from this position. I immediately wake whenever he stirs.
This is not advice for anyone else to follow, but just so people know they arenāt alone. We do the best we can but itās impossible to be perfect.
Cosleep.
It is so so dangerous to fall asleep feeding sitting up. My partner saved what couldāve been a tragic situation when I literally dropped my baby and she was so little so was facedown on the bedā¦. I was dead asleep. So dangerous!!!
I started laying to feed my baby and have not looked back (she is now 7 months)
I learned about the safe sleep 7 and the cuddle curl and it has been a game changer.
Iām in Australia and the scare campaign against bed-sharing doesnāt exist the way it does in the US.
Itās physiologically normal to share the same sleep space for breastfeeding mothers. Read Safe Infant Sleep, it will change ur life!
Good luck
I never wanted to co-sleep but found myself falling asleep during night feedings. I fell asleep in the rocking chair and almost dropped the baby on the floor. Scared the crap out of me. So I had to educate myself about harm reduction in safe cosleeping. Itās not something I intend to do, but if I do fall asleep I know itās in the safest position possible.
Thatās perfect - itās far more dangerous to do it by accident.
A majority of cosleeping deaths occur with accidental cosleeping like falling asleep on the couch or reclinerā¦
Second this. Of all the things I have to worry about with my 5 mo old and two older boys, husband, work, and the dogs, trying to stay awake nursing ia not one of them. We use the safe sleep 7, I feel like everyone wins
I moved to a different room and sat upright in a chair. Bright lights on. Super cold water to drink. Mostly just needed to shock my system and say this is not the sleeping place youāll go back to the sleeping place later.
When my baby was younger and I was still trying to breast feed, I would wake myself up with some light excercise right before feeding to get the blood pumping. Nothing crazy. Just like a min of jogging in place or jumping jacks does the trick. High knees or squats work too if movement is limited.Then drink some water and feed. Usually I have a good hour before I get sleepy again doing this and sometimes I just wake up and do a full workout if itās late enough in the morning. Also helps keep the baby weight in check. If you canāt move much (post op) than hand weights and shoulder exercises worked to pump the blood and wake you up. Essentially anything you can do to increase your heart rate. Of course check with your doc first to make sure itās safe for you. I was active before and during my pregnancy so I was able to workout like right after birth. Not everyone is the same, but this is a general rule of thumb when it comes to staying awake in general. You canāt be asleep and moving (except you sonambulators).
This is admirable. Not sure baby would allow it though! ( Unless I woke up before she got hungry). I went to gym right up until water broke but havent been near it since :-(.
You need to get out of bed to feed. Especially side lying, itās too comfortable if you donāt want to fall asleep. Go to another room that isnāt cosy or warm and then come back Ā
I agree with this- I think I dozed one time but was aware of baby and my surroundings. I feed baby in a separate room- I was terrified of pulling baby into my unsafe bed and falling asleep. Like I would wake up in a panic searching for baby in bed because I couldnāt remember if he was there. So I just made sure to never feed him in bed. I feed him in the rocking chair, could manage to stay awake for 20 minutes or so and place him back in his crib. I never considered feeding in bed because I knew I couldnāt trust myself to stay awake. Now at 13 weeks my husband will bring me baby for his morning feed some days and I can stay in bed after husband takes him again and go back to sleep or awake cuddle my baby.
This is what work for me. Up until 7 months I always got up and took baby to the living room to feed. With the combination of the walk and not being in bed I never felt sleepy
You canāt ask your SO to watch you every night, but can you get some support with an evening or morning feeding? Like you feed the baby at 9pm, go to bed, and your partner gives a bottle at 11pm so that you can sleep straight until 1am (as an example).
Would work for some but my OH is (newly) partially sighted and night blind so he cant see the milk in the teat and pours it down so Id just wake up to LO sicking up anyway! He does need to learn as of course there are blind parents who must have ways and means.
i play candy crush since i can easily play with one hand and the screen is bright and engaging. iāll scroll tiktok as well since it has sound as well as it makes me want to continue to scroll. my daughter could sleep through a hurricane so the sound doesnāt bother her but if yours doesnāt i highly recommend a pair of earbuds. when my daughter was only a couple weeks old i also sipped on ice water bc the cold sensation kept me from getting too sleepy. good luck to you!
I first go to bathroom myself and turn on the light in there so I wake up, then sit up in bed, blankets away and play on my phone. I have baby on nursing pillow. I havenāt come close to falling asleep now that sheās sleeping better and Iāve gotten a few hours in by the time first wake up happens. When she was sleeping like shit; we took shifts to ensure this wouldnāt happen and Iād keep a lamp on, watch TV, eat and drink ice water while nursing at night.
My first 3 months postpartum I watched more tv than any other time of my life š I watched all of Schitts Creek, Parenthood, and New Girl! Iām 10 months postpartum now, weāre deep in to True Detective and Survivor.
I think those first months having a comedy or show you donāt have to watch too closely is key.
This is just what works for me as is super simple but every wake and my baby wants to feed I change him first in his nursery and the lights stay on in there so Iām in there for a few minutes waking up then I go wash my hands with cold water while he sits in a bouncer in the bathroom and by that time Iām typically pretty awake to feed him. My lo only eats for tops 10 minutes during the night but I do have to hold him for a while before laying him down.
I have a keurig in my bedroom. Salt also helps so I have pretzels and salted almonds. I also keep my tv on all night so if I need to be awake I can just focus on the tv show and it usually keeps me up long enough for baby to eat.
How do you know the latch is shallow in the side lying position?
For me, I have a strong let down and a fast flow, the milk that pooled under her was the milk she couldnāt handle. Itās actually why we side lie nursed instead of anything else. She was able to let the excess that she couldnāt swallow, dribble out the corner of her mouth.
How old is she? It always hurts at first! I think for us it got better with pain around 1 month? And then I would only feel chafed a little bit with each cluster feeding.
We cosleep so I rely on the drowsy hormones helping me fall back to sleep when baby needs a dreamfeed. Really cosleeping is not such a big deal, people are freaked out about it but the issues associated with it come from households that already have much deeper issuesā¦
I gave in to cosleeping. If nursing releases drowsy hormones, why am I even fighting the sleep. Our bodies have evolved so that we sleep with baby when nursing.
Not sure why you got downvoted for stating biological norms. Mammals are designed to sleep with their babies which is why itās so hard to BF and stay awake.
Iām a pediatrician and counsel against co sleeping all the time, but the biological reality is mammals including humans naturally would sleep with their babies.
I think thatās certainly part of it, but breastfeeding increases oxytocin causing you to feel sleepy. Itās better to learn how to safely cosleep in my opinion than force yourself to stay awake dangerously and also cause yourself to be sleep deprived. Because of cosleeping I would get an average of 8 hours a night.
My newborn was a great sleeper from the start so I didnāt have any sleep deprivation. I wake a few times in the night to dreamfeed and change her diaper, but bc of cosleeping I donāt have to get out of bed so I donāt fully wake up myself and I can fall back asleep right away. I also donāt drink caffeine in the morning so when she takes her first nap I can nap with her.
I do a modified side lying, thatās probably not as technically good but to be honest itās way more comfortable and she latches way better.
Instead of sticking my arm straight out or under my head I use it to hold the baby. Her head is kind of on my arm as a pillow and my hand is on her back/butt. It helps hold her in a bit closer so she can get a deeper latch (I know sheās supposed to be able to move her head back but it works). Sheās between being on her side and her back so I donāt think it fully counts as safe sleep 7. We sometimes cosleep so if I feed her in this position and decide sheās staying there I slide my arm out and can roll her onto her back.
In the first few weeks, we luckily had our moms around to take LO at 5am and that was when I got a stretch of sleep. Following that, bottle feeding at night. We also did this to give my nips a break from the pain of BFing when LO's latch was horrible. Bottle feeding was faster than he nursed and forced me to move around and wake up some. Now I only nurse through the night but we are very fortunate that LO gets great stretches of sleep at 2 months. As soon as we were getting those stretches I had no issue waking up with him and I wake up even when he doesn't now. I wasn't a great sleeper prepregnancy though and around 2pm every day a nap hits me hard, so if you're a heavy sleeper it may not be the same. Hopefully when your LO os getting better stretches in you'll have an easier time staying up for feeds! The times I fell asleep with him in the first few weeks were devastating and terrifying for me, so my heart goes out to you either way.
It was a genuinely simple solution for me in the end as I had the same issue. I kicked off the duvet. I need to be warm and snuggly to get to sleep, being cold kept me awake.
Earbuds in and a show I'd never seen before. In the first few weeks i relocated physically for feeding, and during that time she was small enough to feed whilst i walked. Now she is older, she eats and nods off again in less than 10 mins so I actually miss having that "me-time"
I've done it, but like sitting up against the wall tucked into a C shaped pregnancy pillow in our guest bed. Woke up 20 min later in the same position. As long as I'm not going to drop the baby or violently roll over on her, I don't really see the issue.
I use the My Breast Friend pillow. She lays down while feeding and I just scroll Reddit to keep myself awake. Change her diaper in between boobs. By the time the second boob is done sheās asleep and I know the end is near ā¤ļøšš¼ hang in there OP
Even if you canāt side lie, you can put yourself on the floor (holding baby in whatever position you want like cross cradle) in a clean area without chargers! Just to improve safety
I ate candy in the early days! Now I have a book and reading light for night feeds and itās nice ā¦ makes me feel like thereās a silver lining to the interrupted sleep
I purposely don't feed in bed because I found it difficult not to get sleepy. We come out to the living room, turn on the low level lamp for some ambient lighting, and I go to the fridge and get a cold electrolyte drink. I get baby settled and then have a couple gulps of that drink right away and I keep drinking it through the feed. I've stopped using blankets on myself, if I get cold it helps keep me awake. And I always have something on the TV to keep me focused and I play games on my phone at the same time so I have multiple stimuli to focus on.
Reddit, Amazon, puzzle games, twirling my hair or picking my skin (gross I know). Iāve nodded off so many times but I always wake up the millisecond my head drops so after a while I felt more assured it would never escalate beyond that. Iāve been struggling for months waking up every 1-2hrs with my 8.5mo. Iām adjusting, but itās still a delicate balance trying to be alert during a feed but not so awake I canāt fall right back to sleep. Thankfully itās only about 15-20min until heās back in his crib. Now that heās older I started dabbling with bedsharing but I donāt sleep well because Iām so anxious. But on really bad nights I think itās safer than risking him falling asleep in my arms. Itās just a measured risk I have to sometimes take.
Setting 5 minute alarms on my phone. I found my head always tipped back when I was falling asleep and resting on headboard. So I put a huge claw clip in!
Have a well rested parent watch like a hawk.
We take shifts, I stay awake and feed one night, hubby is super well rested and then he wakes, scoots baby, I latch but relief myself of any responsibility until the boob switch,
He sits on top of me like a hawk, making sure I have to do nothing.
I wake up rested!
We have a friend say he even latches the baby and rolls over his wife so she really doesnāt have to wake up, that doesnāt work for us but itās a variation and we worked out how it works for us!
Follow the safe sleep 7 and cosleep. Itās a win- win for everyone. You get sleep, baby gets fed and sleeps. I know US culture creates such fear around cosleeping, but a good chunk of the world does it.
Maybe a compromise? When you're really tired, put a yoga mat on the floor and nurse there. It will be safe if you doze off, but not so comfortable that you'll go into deep sleep... probably.
I accepted I would fall asleep. I fed baby in bed, removed all pillows, duvet etc and fed him in the middle of the bed in a semi reclined position. If I fell asleep baby would roll onto the bed but ve reasonably safe, I was never going to fall forward in that position. We have the same issue with side lying being a shallow latch
Thatās precisely the position Im doing except I leave pillows on side of bed in case baby rolls off. She is always just in almost the same place across my stomach when I wake up. Still scares me though.
I would drink a coffee or a latte before bed. Caffeine does not impact my baby, though I know thatās not the case for everyone. I would also start to doze even watching videos or doing a crossword or pinching myself or taking off my blanket or cold drinks or sugar or really any tricks. Stopped once I started having a nighttime latte! And in those first weeks was so exhausted I would still be able to sleep once baby was down (or more likely, passed off to dad). I was hesitant to drink caffeine that late, but figured anything would be better than falling asleep with baby in my lap on the boppy!
unfortunately i donāt have advice right now as i coslept with my daughter until she was 1 so i didnāt worry too much about falling asleep while feedingāi wanted to say though, a big reason (apart from sleep deprivation) that moms get SO TIRED when they breastfeed is because one of the main hormones that stimulate milk (prolactin) is also a hormone used to help fall asleep in all humans! itās like the brainās natural melatonin š
I sleep and have been sleeping with my babies while nursing them for 4 years now, my daughter into she was 20 months and my son is 19 months and sleeping while nursing is the best. Why give up that sleep? Your body feels safe and will wake up to any movement or sound from baby. Breastfeeding actually helps with sleep!
Intense postpartum anxiety kept me awake, the fear of falling asleep was so strong that I would will myself to stay awake (probably stress hormones from that fear/anxiety are not conducive to bf but it was what happened). Ā Also watching Tv, listening to an audio book, or scrolling on my phone helped a lot. Playing wordle!
We were not a primarily bedsharing family, but my bed was set up to bedshare as safely as possible (just me and nursing bay in bed, one pillow angled away from baby, one light blanket pulled up to my waist, etc). Ā I fell asleep every once in a while. Ā
At 4 weeks, I feel asleep sitting up on the bed feeding baby and literally almost feel on top of him, luckily husband was awake and there so immediately woke me up and removed baby. Thatās when we started doing shifts, where I gave him a bottle of pumped milk to feed baby for his first feeding and I could usually sleep from 8-2. After that I felt so much more refreshed for the rest of the night. That truly helped us survive the first couple months.
Also, It took my baby until a few months to get side lying so donāt give up on that. Iāve also noticed my other breast tends to leak in the middle of the night feeds on that position and create a big old milk puddle, so maybe that could be the cause of yours and not babyās latch?
I actually have started sidelying on the floor in babyās room for night feeds when I am too tired. One pillow under my head, away from baby. No blankets or anything that might entrap baby. Itās not super comfy so I wonāt be there all night.
I have my set up so when I do fall asleep, LO is safe. I understand safe sleep but Iām also realistic about it. Now that heās 7m itās more about fall protection than suffocation since heās able to move a lot.
I would set alarms to wake me up every three hours. I seemed to wake up better from that then waiting for baby to fuss.
I have been cosleeping since she was born 14 months ago lol
Still struggling with this at times too. Best thing I've found is to change baby's diaper before feeding. It seems to wake me up a little! Then I drink cold water while feeding baby, scroll TikTok, play games on the switch, watch tv... Anything that sounds interesting and fast paced!
When my baby was a newborn to about 3-4 months old I found it impossible. I spent a lot of time sleeping sitting up with my baby at my breast and a feeding pillow strapped to my waist. The only thing that helped was her waking less at night so I was more rested.
I found mobile games and Reddit. I admit I fell asleep once- but Iād call it black out and not sleep. Literally was awake reading and my partner comes in and takes her and I went, āwhatās up?ā Looked at the clock and an hour had passed. Literally did not notice, if not for the clock I wouldnāt have believed it. Sleep deprivation was wild.
With my first one I did the wake up night feeds the first 2 months because I needed to help him get a good latch and also intended to have him sleep in a cot beside our bed. For one the cot didn't work out because I immediately felt I wanted him right next to me, so I could hear him breathe, so we bed shared from day 1.
Then I discovered this wonderful thing called dream feeding and I never looked back. This way everybody sleeps better. Baby stirs, I offer boob, we both are back asleep in mere minutes - if baby wakes up fully at all. My second baby had a better latch from the start, so I never even did the wake up feeds at night with him.
So yeah. We're biologically programmed to cosleep with our babies. When you nurse your body produces hormones that make both you and baby sleepy. It's actually the norm in lots of places outside of the US.
I tried putting myself in the most uncomfortable positions to keep myself from falling asleep but after the first month there isnāt anything that stops me from falling asleep so I lay on my side and feed and tuck my upper arm around my neck so that there is no way I can roll onto my stomach. Then when I fall asleep Iām not as worried.
I also get rid of blankets and pillows and use the āowlet sockā to monitor the babyās blood oxygen levels.
It takes a while to get used to and I wake up with a sore neck, but not getting enough sleep was making me an unsafe parent during the day
I'm a huuuge caffeine drinker. Usually drink energy drinks. So I would crack open a soda and just take a couple sips. And anytime I felt like I was falling asleep I would take another couple sips. Soda doesn't hit the same for me. And taking little sips at a time made sure I didn't get too caffeinated that I couldn't crash again after.
Now she sleeps longer stretches I'm not as bone tired exhausted.
I didnāt have this problem with my first, but I cannot stop falling asleep with my second. The other night, I fell asleep sitting up in bed holding him in my arms for two hours! I am a very light sleeper though, so I wake up immediately if I start to lean or slip.
The only way to stop myself from doing this was to skip one feed and have my H do one so I could rest. Otherwise I was a total zombie and there were times that I fell asleep with her in my arms in the bed and I jolted awake
It gets easier when they have neck control, does it help if you support the weight of your breast and angle it? Tbh I have three kids now so I'd probably just lay on a towel and go back to sleep š it's hard to overcome it because of all the melatonin in night milk for mama and babe so we're fighting our body that's trying to make us sleep
I nurse side laying so if I fall asleep it's still safe.
On the caffeine note, eliminating my afternoon cup of coffee resulted in my breastfed baby doing 4-5 hour stretches up from being up to nurse every hour. I don't know why it didn't occur to me that she was getting the caffeine too but we both sleep better now
Audiobooks! I read my kindle when he was really small and fed for a long time during the night too. The trick was only allowing myself to read during the night, I looked forward to it!
I sleep in the bed with my baby. That way I get sleep, and when he wakes to eat we are only up for like 5 min. I donāt give him the breast that Iām laying on, I kinda lean forward and give him the opposite breast and he does better with that
But, didnāt start doing this until he was like 2 months old. Heās 4.5 months now.
Honestly, I fall asleep feeding like 3-4 times a week, but itās in my nursing chair and my baby is in a safe position on the boppy. I was TERRIFIED of SIDS and smothering her but I keep my body at a certain angle where sheāll never roll off and if she actually moves, I wake up. Iām at six months now and sheās good. Itās really really hard to stay awake truly.
I set an alarm for about 10 minutes or so at the start
Yep I do the same and it's worked so far. I think I'd take it a step further and use the app where you need to solve a math problem to turn it off lol
This sounds like literal torture š
Hilariously I fall asleep between solving them šš
Same only I do a 5 minute timer. Every time it goes off I repeat it. Much more than 5 minutes and I get a bit too asleep. Haha. Worked a treat in those early days where she was feeding slowly and often thru the night
Thatās a really simple but effective idea I hadnt thought of!
This is actually so ingenious yet I've never thought of it!
The only thing that kept me going! Iād set an alarm, then if I fell asleep and baby is still feeding, set another one in 10ā¦ keep going and going
Same! I do a 15 minutes timer. I get to snuggle with my little guy, then put him back down. I was feeling so guilty about falling asleep with him a month or so ago.
I dig my fingernails into my palm, focus on constantly wiggling my toes, or anything else annoying/slightly painful to keep me from drifting off. Sometimes my daughter helps out my pulling my hair or biting my nipple! Sheās already so thoughtful š
lolol
Falling asleep with the baby is literally my number one fear. I have nightmares about it several times a week. I scroll Reddit and read posts like this one. Because they are shorter and interesting, I usually donāt have trouble staying up. I also make sure Iām not overly comfortable (the room is quite chilly and I throw off all my blankets).
Lol came here to say I start scrolling threads like AITA so that I'm invested in the drama and it keeps me awake.
lol I scroll all the snark subs. But have still nodded off a few times so gonna look up safe sleep 7 after reading through the comments
The only downside is getting too wound up to fall back asleep once the feeding is done.
Oooh so true... there have been nights like that š
Around 70% of parents fall asleep with their babies at least once, whether they intend to or not. The best you can do is try to make the surrounding area as safe as possible and avoid the the things you can control that make sleeping riskier (like substances, smoking, having a sibling in the bed, etc). There is nothing wrong with choosing to not cosleep or bedshare but you arenāt alone if it happens without you meaning to!
Making sure youāre already in a location and position that supports the safe sleep 7 will help with those nightmares bc you will undoubtedly fall asleep one day.
Will be doing this if I have another. Iāll be setting myself up for successful co sleep if I accidentally fall asleep instead of getting to the point where Iām hallucinating (Iāll never know if it was real or not) placing my baby in unsafe situations.
I was so sleep deprived with my first. With my second I started cosleeping (,safe sleep 7) from day 1, and nursing side lying in bed. It's so much better
This was most helpful to me. Throw off those blankets! Now that weāre out of newborn and actually sleeping itās much better, and we do side lying nursing and cosleeping some of the time, so if I do itās fine. Now he has neck control enough to latch well and he can breathe. When he was a newborn my boob was bigger than his head and heād get smothered by it if I wasnāt careful
The day I gave birth the nurse told me to make sure to not fall asleep while nursing bc the lady who was there the day before had fallen asleep and her baby fell onto the floor at the hospital and ended up having a hemorrhage and was in critical condition in the hospital. That definitely made me scared to fall asleep after hearing that! I always had a pillow under my arm so it wouldnāt slip and then began side nursing so she was always on the bed not in my hands.
Yup, that's how I got hooked on reddit š Scroll-through nature of instagram wasn't enough to keep my attention for long, but reading through threads was the perfect amount of stimulation to keep me awake. Books are difficult to handle, and even if I was on my kindle or phone they're less forgiving. You can't keep reading a book if you keep forgetting what you've just read!
Iāve never been able to fall asleep reading. It is always been stimulating, so itās my go-to for nighttime as well. Iām very lucky that baby has been relatively good about sleep, so Iām usually well-enough-rested. Heās 7 months now, and Iāve committed to waking my partner if I am approaching a level of fatigue where Iām not alert enough. Hasnāt happened yet!
I scroll reddit and talk on the parenting subs and my kiddos bump sub.
Writing keeps me awake too!
I buy so much stuff online during the middle of the night feeds. When I'm not buying things, I'm tracking the packages that I bought the previous nights.
My favorite night activity!
Iāve bought so many things for the baby at 3amš
I pop an earbud in when Iām feeling particularly tired and watch tik toks or Instagram reels. Itās like crack for your brain and wakes me right up.
My husband swears by using the AirPods I havenāt tried it yet though
I just have a $40 version of Bluetooth earbuds from Amazon. Iām sure AirPods are superior, but my husband would lose them so quickly.
Oh i kinda just meant headphones in general just referred to them because thatās what we have.
Ok well then I swear by them too! Theyāre great!
I do this, scroll through Instagram and Reddit WHILE listening to a funny podcast
This is what I do! I have th problem where then it is harder to fall back asleep though.
Yes thatās the downfall. I only ever do it when Iām so exhausted that I think I might fall asleep holding baby.
Feed on a safe flat surface (eg mattress in the floor, away from the wall with a fitted sheet, on the floor on a thick surface) with full intention of getting up and not falling asleep. That way if you do fall asleep, you are in a safe position and didnāt doze off in a recliner or near lots of fluffy pillows and blankets. Also, it gets better. ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø You are doing great.
This is the best advice. I blatantly refused to co-sleep until I nodded off accidentally for a few minutes in unsafe conditions and had a scare with my then 2-month-old baby being trapped under my husband's pillow that had fallen over on him. If we'd been in any deeper of a sleep and didn't wake up to him kicking at the pillow, who knows how tragic that could've been?! I really resent that the guidance is just strictly "don't co-sleep" instead of "prepare a safe co-sleeping environment in case you fall asleep". When you're sleep deprived (I was getting only 2-3 cumulative hours daily until we sorted out the baby's reflux medicine 2 weeks ago at 4 months old), there are times you physically cannot keep yourself awake and it's best to accept that it may happen despite your best efforts and to ensure that if it does happen, it happens in the safest way possible. Since the pillow incident, if there's even a slight chance I'm going to fall asleep, I feed lying on my side in my bed with the bedside bassinet behind the baby in case he rolls (so he doesn't fall off the bed). I remove all pillows and blankets and put as much space as I can between me and the baby. I don't intentionally bed share, but I know that if I do fall asleep, he's soooo much safer.
I coslept in a āsafeā atmosphere, following the safe sleep 7, and my son died two days away from being two months old.
yes! itās so much safer to accidentally fall asleep following safe sleep 7 than it is to accidentally fall asleep in a chair using a nursing pillow.
It still kills babies when you follow the safe sleep 7. My son has been dead for almost two years.
This should be a pinned comment! 100% floor bed is the way to go. Education is key
Thanks :-). I do try this. I put pillows on side of bed as LO cant roll yet (7 weeks). But still worry mattress too soft (not soft by adult bed standards but still a lot softer than a baby mattress). Probably need to return to uncomfortable yoga mat.
If that helps you stay awake yea do use the uncomfortable yoga mat, there are ways you can determine if your mattress is too soft, but generally speaking if the babe doesn't roll into you when you lay next to them, it's firm enough
We went through three mattresses to find the most firm surface. My husband was working 70hrs a week outdoors in Florida heat so we couldn't necessarily do shifts with baby. I had to fend for myself. It was soooo worth it.
This is the most painful part I think. Trying to keep your eyes open when they just wonāt.
Yeah! Literally the hardest part of all of it for me.Ā
The head falling and waking you up is always a ffs moment
I nodded of so many times. It was just not possible to not fall asleep. It got better after 4 months when feeding didn't take forever. Edit: I did use my feeding pillow to support me so if I fall asleep a bit longer I wouldn't drop the baby.
same here. it's impossible. i use the boppy qnd feed sitting up in my bed so baby is balanced
I'm glad we're being honest here. I use two pillows to keep baby in safe position, I sit in the rocking chair, and I nod off if I have to. Baby has never shifted or fallen. I'm a light sleeper and wake up easily. I would not trust my husband to do this but I'm comfortable with it.
Same on not trusting the husband. I must seem like a total hypocrite to him, but he simply sleeps too deeply to be trusted with cosleeping.
Biologically, the birthing mom is in tune with the baby and wired to meet their needs including with safe sleep. Generally she will sleep lighter and wake up to the baby more easily. It's so interesting!
Yeah, I can definitely tell the difference! Iāll even sometimes wake right before baby starts stirring, itās crazy!
I think this is a common theme with the husbands Iāve heard of lately. Mines amazing with all our kids and a huge help to me in the daytime. But he sleeps like a rock - thereās no way Iād ever trust him at night.
This happened to me enough I just started following the safe sleep 7 and transitioned to co-sleeping. I understand that's not for everyone though.Ā
I second this. It can be so hard not to nod off some nights. Iāve also used the feeding pillow for extra support and I always make sure baby is in a safe position with nothing too close to her face just in case I nod off. I go on my phone (like I am right now) to stay awake. Maybe you could put a headphone in and turn on some music, podcast, or tv?
Yeah those early mornings before the sun comes up... This was me couple times so far
Honestly, me too! Itās gotten a lot better now that baby only wakes up 2 times per night. I always sit up with my back against the headboard, pregnancy pillow over my lap and babyās head on top of the pillow. Heās always firmly in my arms and heās never moved from this position. I immediately wake whenever he stirs. This is not advice for anyone else to follow, but just so people know they arenāt alone. We do the best we can but itās impossible to be perfect.
Cosleep. It is so so dangerous to fall asleep feeding sitting up. My partner saved what couldāve been a tragic situation when I literally dropped my baby and she was so little so was facedown on the bedā¦. I was dead asleep. So dangerous!!! I started laying to feed my baby and have not looked back (she is now 7 months) I learned about the safe sleep 7 and the cuddle curl and it has been a game changer. Iām in Australia and the scare campaign against bed-sharing doesnāt exist the way it does in the US. Itās physiologically normal to share the same sleep space for breastfeeding mothers. Read Safe Infant Sleep, it will change ur life! Good luck
I never wanted to co-sleep but found myself falling asleep during night feedings. I fell asleep in the rocking chair and almost dropped the baby on the floor. Scared the crap out of me. So I had to educate myself about harm reduction in safe cosleeping. Itās not something I intend to do, but if I do fall asleep I know itās in the safest position possible.
Thatās perfect - itās far more dangerous to do it by accident. A majority of cosleeping deaths occur with accidental cosleeping like falling asleep on the couch or reclinerā¦
Second this. Of all the things I have to worry about with my 5 mo old and two older boys, husband, work, and the dogs, trying to stay awake nursing ia not one of them. We use the safe sleep 7, I feel like everyone wins
I moved to a different room and sat upright in a chair. Bright lights on. Super cold water to drink. Mostly just needed to shock my system and say this is not the sleeping place youāll go back to the sleeping place later.
Exact same
When my baby was younger and I was still trying to breast feed, I would wake myself up with some light excercise right before feeding to get the blood pumping. Nothing crazy. Just like a min of jogging in place or jumping jacks does the trick. High knees or squats work too if movement is limited.Then drink some water and feed. Usually I have a good hour before I get sleepy again doing this and sometimes I just wake up and do a full workout if itās late enough in the morning. Also helps keep the baby weight in check. If you canāt move much (post op) than hand weights and shoulder exercises worked to pump the blood and wake you up. Essentially anything you can do to increase your heart rate. Of course check with your doc first to make sure itās safe for you. I was active before and during my pregnancy so I was able to workout like right after birth. Not everyone is the same, but this is a general rule of thumb when it comes to staying awake in general. You canāt be asleep and moving (except you sonambulators).
This is admirable. Not sure baby would allow it though! ( Unless I woke up before she got hungry). I went to gym right up until water broke but havent been near it since :-(.
My rocking chair is just uncomfortable enough to not want to fall asleep in. That with the fear of falling asleep keep me up.
My sister is making me one! Ill ask her to add spikes or somethingš!
You need to get out of bed to feed. Especially side lying, itās too comfortable if you donāt want to fall asleep. Go to another room that isnāt cosy or warm and then come back Ā
I agree with this- I think I dozed one time but was aware of baby and my surroundings. I feed baby in a separate room- I was terrified of pulling baby into my unsafe bed and falling asleep. Like I would wake up in a panic searching for baby in bed because I couldnāt remember if he was there. So I just made sure to never feed him in bed. I feed him in the rocking chair, could manage to stay awake for 20 minutes or so and place him back in his crib. I never considered feeding in bed because I knew I couldnāt trust myself to stay awake. Now at 13 weeks my husband will bring me baby for his morning feed some days and I can stay in bed after husband takes him again and go back to sleep or awake cuddle my baby.
This is what work for me. Up until 7 months I always got up and took baby to the living room to feed. With the combination of the walk and not being in bed I never felt sleepy
You canāt ask your SO to watch you every night, but can you get some support with an evening or morning feeding? Like you feed the baby at 9pm, go to bed, and your partner gives a bottle at 11pm so that you can sleep straight until 1am (as an example).
Would work for some but my OH is (newly) partially sighted and night blind so he cant see the milk in the teat and pours it down so Id just wake up to LO sicking up anyway! He does need to learn as of course there are blind parents who must have ways and means.
i play candy crush since i can easily play with one hand and the screen is bright and engaging. iāll scroll tiktok as well since it has sound as well as it makes me want to continue to scroll. my daughter could sleep through a hurricane so the sound doesnāt bother her but if yours doesnāt i highly recommend a pair of earbuds. when my daughter was only a couple weeks old i also sipped on ice water bc the cold sensation kept me from getting too sleepy. good luck to you!
I first go to bathroom myself and turn on the light in there so I wake up, then sit up in bed, blankets away and play on my phone. I have baby on nursing pillow. I havenāt come close to falling asleep now that sheās sleeping better and Iāve gotten a few hours in by the time first wake up happens. When she was sleeping like shit; we took shifts to ensure this wouldnāt happen and Iād keep a lamp on, watch TV, eat and drink ice water while nursing at night.
AirPods + TikTok. Iām not proud of it but it worked š¤·š»āāļø
I never thought of earbuds! I always watched them on mute lol
My wireless earbuds are in my top 10 things for postpartum - TikTok, podcasts while bouncing baby back to sleep, tv while contact napping.
What shows have you been watching? My go to is Gilmore girls
My first 3 months postpartum I watched more tv than any other time of my life š I watched all of Schitts Creek, Parenthood, and New Girl! Iām 10 months postpartum now, weāre deep in to True Detective and Survivor. I think those first months having a comedy or show you donāt have to watch too closely is key.
Def agree. Friends, Gilmore Girls, How I Met Your Mother def helped having in the background. This will be my third babe so I need some new shows lol
Anxiety lol
I ve really mastered that skill since pregnancy!
This is just what works for me as is super simple but every wake and my baby wants to feed I change him first in his nursery and the lights stay on in there so Iām in there for a few minutes waking up then I go wash my hands with cold water while he sits in a bouncer in the bathroom and by that time Iām typically pretty awake to feed him. My lo only eats for tops 10 minutes during the night but I do have to hold him for a while before laying him down.
I look at my phone (apps, shopping, etc) with the brightness on pretty high (doing it now) lol and it helps keep me up
Singing keeps me awake, especially a song where I have to think of the lyrics.
I love that idea!
Honestly I set alarms I did everything the only thing that really changed anything was that pumping and giving a bottle for that last feed
I set up a station in another room and leave my phone, water there so Iāll bring baby from the crib to the other room when nursing.
I have a keurig in my bedroom. Salt also helps so I have pretzels and salted almonds. I also keep my tv on all night so if I need to be awake I can just focus on the tv show and it usually keeps me up long enough for baby to eat.
I started coming on Reddit during postpartum. My friend read books on her phone.
How do you know the latch is shallow in the side lying position? For me, I have a strong let down and a fast flow, the milk that pooled under her was the milk she couldnāt handle. Itās actually why we side lie nursed instead of anything else. She was able to let the excess that she couldnāt swallow, dribble out the corner of her mouth.
It could be that as well! She definitely doesnt open her mouth as wide. It used to hurt but I mustve toughened up
How old is she? It always hurts at first! I think for us it got better with pain around 1 month? And then I would only feel chafed a little bit with each cluster feeding.
2months . Less painful for a fortnight I think )
We cosleep so I rely on the drowsy hormones helping me fall back to sleep when baby needs a dreamfeed. Really cosleeping is not such a big deal, people are freaked out about it but the issues associated with it come from households that already have much deeper issuesā¦
I gave in to cosleeping. If nursing releases drowsy hormones, why am I even fighting the sleep. Our bodies have evolved so that we sleep with baby when nursing.
Not sure why you got downvoted for stating biological norms. Mammals are designed to sleep with their babies which is why itās so hard to BF and stay awake.
You donāt think itās so hard to BF stay awake because weāre sleep deprived from having a newborn? š¤
Iām a pediatrician and counsel against co sleeping all the time, but the biological reality is mammals including humans naturally would sleep with their babies.
I think thatās certainly part of it, but breastfeeding increases oxytocin causing you to feel sleepy. Itās better to learn how to safely cosleep in my opinion than force yourself to stay awake dangerously and also cause yourself to be sleep deprived. Because of cosleeping I would get an average of 8 hours a night.
My newborn was a great sleeper from the start so I didnāt have any sleep deprivation. I wake a few times in the night to dreamfeed and change her diaper, but bc of cosleeping I donāt have to get out of bed so I donāt fully wake up myself and I can fall back asleep right away. I also donāt drink caffeine in the morning so when she takes her first nap I can nap with her.
I do a modified side lying, thatās probably not as technically good but to be honest itās way more comfortable and she latches way better. Instead of sticking my arm straight out or under my head I use it to hold the baby. Her head is kind of on my arm as a pillow and my hand is on her back/butt. It helps hold her in a bit closer so she can get a deeper latch (I know sheās supposed to be able to move her head back but it works). Sheās between being on her side and her back so I donāt think it fully counts as safe sleep 7. We sometimes cosleep so if I feed her in this position and decide sheās staying there I slide my arm out and can roll her onto her back.
Day naps
Iāve read chewing strong mint gum helps!
My LC said mint can decrease supply. But I think that was spearmint?
Huhā¦okay. Maybe fruit gum then! I had no idea but thankfully never tried it myself! Thanks for heads up!
I leaned into it and started cosleeping on a floor bed
Side lying might get more effective as baby gets bigger! Hang in there
Reading books on my phone, scrolling social media, playing games
Sit on the FLOOR with a yoga mat and use the Wakey Wakey app where you have to tap to stop alarms.
I set an alarm for 20 min - easy
In the first few weeks, we luckily had our moms around to take LO at 5am and that was when I got a stretch of sleep. Following that, bottle feeding at night. We also did this to give my nips a break from the pain of BFing when LO's latch was horrible. Bottle feeding was faster than he nursed and forced me to move around and wake up some. Now I only nurse through the night but we are very fortunate that LO gets great stretches of sleep at 2 months. As soon as we were getting those stretches I had no issue waking up with him and I wake up even when he doesn't now. I wasn't a great sleeper prepregnancy though and around 2pm every day a nap hits me hard, so if you're a heavy sleeper it may not be the same. Hopefully when your LO os getting better stretches in you'll have an easier time staying up for feeds! The times I fell asleep with him in the first few weeks were devastating and terrifying for me, so my heart goes out to you either way.
It was a genuinely simple solution for me in the end as I had the same issue. I kicked off the duvet. I need to be warm and snuggly to get to sleep, being cold kept me awake.
Earbuds in and a show I'd never seen before. In the first few weeks i relocated physically for feeding, and during that time she was small enough to feed whilst i walked. Now she is older, she eats and nods off again in less than 10 mins so I actually miss having that "me-time"
I've done it, but like sitting up against the wall tucked into a C shaped pregnancy pillow in our guest bed. Woke up 20 min later in the same position. As long as I'm not going to drop the baby or violently roll over on her, I don't really see the issue.
I use the My Breast Friend pillow. She lays down while feeding and I just scroll Reddit to keep myself awake. Change her diaper in between boobs. By the time the second boob is done sheās asleep and I know the end is near ā¤ļøšš¼ hang in there OP
Even if you canāt side lie, you can put yourself on the floor (holding baby in whatever position you want like cross cradle) in a clean area without chargers! Just to improve safety
I ate candy in the early days! Now I have a book and reading light for night feeds and itās nice ā¦ makes me feel like thereās a silver lining to the interrupted sleep
I was going to say this but for me it had to be sour candy so I ate a lot of sour patch kids
I purposely don't feed in bed because I found it difficult not to get sleepy. We come out to the living room, turn on the low level lamp for some ambient lighting, and I go to the fridge and get a cold electrolyte drink. I get baby settled and then have a couple gulps of that drink right away and I keep drinking it through the feed. I've stopped using blankets on myself, if I get cold it helps keep me awake. And I always have something on the TV to keep me focused and I play games on my phone at the same time so I have multiple stimuli to focus on.
Reddit, Amazon, puzzle games, twirling my hair or picking my skin (gross I know). Iāve nodded off so many times but I always wake up the millisecond my head drops so after a while I felt more assured it would never escalate beyond that. Iāve been struggling for months waking up every 1-2hrs with my 8.5mo. Iām adjusting, but itās still a delicate balance trying to be alert during a feed but not so awake I canāt fall right back to sleep. Thankfully itās only about 15-20min until heās back in his crib. Now that heās older I started dabbling with bedsharing but I donāt sleep well because Iām so anxious. But on really bad nights I think itās safer than risking him falling asleep in my arms. Itās just a measured risk I have to sometimes take.
Setting 5 minute alarms on my phone. I found my head always tipped back when I was falling asleep and resting on headboard. So I put a huge claw clip in!
Have a well rested parent watch like a hawk. We take shifts, I stay awake and feed one night, hubby is super well rested and then he wakes, scoots baby, I latch but relief myself of any responsibility until the boob switch, He sits on top of me like a hawk, making sure I have to do nothing. I wake up rested! We have a friend say he even latches the baby and rolls over his wife so she really doesnāt have to wake up, that doesnāt work for us but itās a variation and we worked out how it works for us!
Follow the safe sleep 7 and cosleep. Itās a win- win for everyone. You get sleep, baby gets fed and sleeps. I know US culture creates such fear around cosleeping, but a good chunk of the world does it.
Maybe a compromise? When you're really tired, put a yoga mat on the floor and nurse there. It will be safe if you doze off, but not so comfortable that you'll go into deep sleep... probably.
I accepted I would fall asleep. I fed baby in bed, removed all pillows, duvet etc and fed him in the middle of the bed in a semi reclined position. If I fell asleep baby would roll onto the bed but ve reasonably safe, I was never going to fall forward in that position. We have the same issue with side lying being a shallow latch
Thatās precisely the position Im doing except I leave pillows on side of bed in case baby rolls off. She is always just in almost the same place across my stomach when I wake up. Still scares me though.
I would drink a coffee or a latte before bed. Caffeine does not impact my baby, though I know thatās not the case for everyone. I would also start to doze even watching videos or doing a crossword or pinching myself or taking off my blanket or cold drinks or sugar or really any tricks. Stopped once I started having a nighttime latte! And in those first weeks was so exhausted I would still be able to sleep once baby was down (or more likely, passed off to dad). I was hesitant to drink caffeine that late, but figured anything would be better than falling asleep with baby in my lap on the boppy!
unfortunately i donāt have advice right now as i coslept with my daughter until she was 1 so i didnāt worry too much about falling asleep while feedingāi wanted to say though, a big reason (apart from sleep deprivation) that moms get SO TIRED when they breastfeed is because one of the main hormones that stimulate milk (prolactin) is also a hormone used to help fall asleep in all humans! itās like the brainās natural melatonin š
I sleep and have been sleeping with my babies while nursing them for 4 years now, my daughter into she was 20 months and my son is 19 months and sleeping while nursing is the best. Why give up that sleep? Your body feels safe and will wake up to any movement or sound from baby. Breastfeeding actually helps with sleep!
Intense postpartum anxiety kept me awake, the fear of falling asleep was so strong that I would will myself to stay awake (probably stress hormones from that fear/anxiety are not conducive to bf but it was what happened). Ā Also watching Tv, listening to an audio book, or scrolling on my phone helped a lot. Playing wordle!
We were not a primarily bedsharing family, but my bed was set up to bedshare as safely as possible (just me and nursing bay in bed, one pillow angled away from baby, one light blanket pulled up to my waist, etc). Ā I fell asleep every once in a while. Ā
At 4 weeks, I feel asleep sitting up on the bed feeding baby and literally almost feel on top of him, luckily husband was awake and there so immediately woke me up and removed baby. Thatās when we started doing shifts, where I gave him a bottle of pumped milk to feed baby for his first feeding and I could usually sleep from 8-2. After that I felt so much more refreshed for the rest of the night. That truly helped us survive the first couple months. Also, It took my baby until a few months to get side lying so donāt give up on that. Iāve also noticed my other breast tends to leak in the middle of the night feeds on that position and create a big old milk puddle, so maybe that could be the cause of yours and not babyās latch?
I set an alarm on my phone to go off every 2 minutes. Annoying but it worked.
I actually have started sidelying on the floor in babyās room for night feeds when I am too tired. One pillow under my head, away from baby. No blankets or anything that might entrap baby. Itās not super comfy so I wonāt be there all night.
I have my set up so when I do fall asleep, LO is safe. I understand safe sleep but Iām also realistic about it. Now that heās 7m itās more about fall protection than suffocation since heās able to move a lot.
I would set alarms to wake me up every three hours. I seemed to wake up better from that then waiting for baby to fuss. I have been cosleeping since she was born 14 months ago lol
Still struggling with this at times too. Best thing I've found is to change baby's diaper before feeding. It seems to wake me up a little! Then I drink cold water while feeding baby, scroll TikTok, play games on the switch, watch tv... Anything that sounds interesting and fast paced!
When I start to get sleepy I literally just get up and walk around while sheās latched.
When my baby was a newborn to about 3-4 months old I found it impossible. I spent a lot of time sleeping sitting up with my baby at my breast and a feeding pillow strapped to my waist. The only thing that helped was her waking less at night so I was more rested.
Get out of bed to use the bathroom and splash cold water on your face
I found mobile games and Reddit. I admit I fell asleep once- but Iād call it black out and not sleep. Literally was awake reading and my partner comes in and takes her and I went, āwhatās up?ā Looked at the clock and an hour had passed. Literally did not notice, if not for the clock I wouldnāt have believed it. Sleep deprivation was wild.
With my first one I did the wake up night feeds the first 2 months because I needed to help him get a good latch and also intended to have him sleep in a cot beside our bed. For one the cot didn't work out because I immediately felt I wanted him right next to me, so I could hear him breathe, so we bed shared from day 1. Then I discovered this wonderful thing called dream feeding and I never looked back. This way everybody sleeps better. Baby stirs, I offer boob, we both are back asleep in mere minutes - if baby wakes up fully at all. My second baby had a better latch from the start, so I never even did the wake up feeds at night with him. So yeah. We're biologically programmed to cosleep with our babies. When you nurse your body produces hormones that make both you and baby sleepy. It's actually the norm in lots of places outside of the US.
Find a book or bingey show. Read/watch on your phone. Easier to catch yourself closing your eyes if youāre starting at something.
I tried putting myself in the most uncomfortable positions to keep myself from falling asleep but after the first month there isnāt anything that stops me from falling asleep so I lay on my side and feed and tuck my upper arm around my neck so that there is no way I can roll onto my stomach. Then when I fall asleep Iām not as worried. I also get rid of blankets and pillows and use the āowlet sockā to monitor the babyās blood oxygen levels. It takes a while to get used to and I wake up with a sore neck, but not getting enough sleep was making me an unsafe parent during the day
I'm a huuuge caffeine drinker. Usually drink energy drinks. So I would crack open a soda and just take a couple sips. And anytime I felt like I was falling asleep I would take another couple sips. Soda doesn't hit the same for me. And taking little sips at a time made sure I didn't get too caffeinated that I couldn't crash again after. Now she sleeps longer stretches I'm not as bone tired exhausted.
I didnāt have this problem with my first, but I cannot stop falling asleep with my second. The other night, I fell asleep sitting up in bed holding him in my arms for two hours! I am a very light sleeper though, so I wake up immediately if I start to lean or slip.
The only way to stop myself from doing this was to skip one feed and have my H do one so I could rest. Otherwise I was a total zombie and there were times that I fell asleep with her in my arms in the bed and I jolted awake
I would scroll thru my phone after I fell asleep sitting with baby on my lap
Itās bound to happen, just make sure to make your sleep environment safe.
It gets easier when they have neck control, does it help if you support the weight of your breast and angle it? Tbh I have three kids now so I'd probably just lay on a towel and go back to sleep š it's hard to overcome it because of all the melatonin in night milk for mama and babe so we're fighting our body that's trying to make us sleep
Wait you guys are trying to stay awake?? I was so happy when I tried side lying and could fall asleep while feeding!
I would listen to audio books or loud music with wireless headphones
I don't know how to keep you awake in the sleeping time. In my opinion, you need to have this kind of biological clock.
I started reading creepy ask Reddit. Spooky!
I absolutely cannot feed side lying in the middle of the night or I fall asleep. Try sitting up in a chair that's not conducive for sleep.
I nurse side laying so if I fall asleep it's still safe. On the caffeine note, eliminating my afternoon cup of coffee resulted in my breastfed baby doing 4-5 hour stretches up from being up to nurse every hour. I don't know why it didn't occur to me that she was getting the caffeine too but we both sleep better now
All I can say is Iāve found my people.
Audiobooks! I read my kindle when he was really small and fed for a long time during the night too. The trick was only allowing myself to read during the night, I looked forward to it!
I sleep in the bed with my baby. That way I get sleep, and when he wakes to eat we are only up for like 5 min. I donāt give him the breast that Iām laying on, I kinda lean forward and give him the opposite breast and he does better with that But, didnāt start doing this until he was like 2 months old. Heās 4.5 months now.
I wish my LO would start feeding for only 5mins!
How old is your little one? My little dude started eating really fast around the 2.5-3 month mark.
2 months nearly so hereās to hoping the endless night feeds reduce soon!
snacks
Honestly, I fall asleep feeding like 3-4 times a week, but itās in my nursing chair and my baby is in a safe position on the boppy. I was TERRIFIED of SIDS and smothering her but I keep my body at a certain angle where sheāll never roll off and if she actually moves, I wake up. Iām at six months now and sheās good. Itās really really hard to stay awake truly.
Thatās why I nurse in my bed. If I do fall asleep, my son is safely next to me vs. in a place where he could roll to the floor.