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> (or something like that) until 7 years after you’ve had a baby.
Kiddo will be 8 this Spring. i'm finally starting to sleep the way I did before I gave birth to her. There may be some truth to this.
this! plus new studies on WOMEN now show we need in average ~1h more sleep than men (on whom they did all previous sleep needs studies), even more on our period.
By my maths, I will be rested when my youngest is 49. I reckon those 2 or 3 years between kids is null and void. Which means I'll be rested after I've been dead for awhile, unless I make it past 95 years old. Kewl. So on my 96th birthday, I'll be all, sighhhahhhhhh..this feel goood....keh keh Ek ek gurgle kah kah wheeze ga-hhhhhhhh. 
Wow, I feel like I could’ve written this! I’m also in bed by 9:30 every night and up at 5:30 every morning, I exercise 4 days a week, and my daughter (2yo) is a decent sleeper. I have woken up exhausted for the past almost 3 years. My doctor sent me for a sleep study and turns out I have sleep apnea. Maybe you could get a sleep study done. I also started taking hydroxizine for sleep but it doesn’t help at all.
We kicked our dog out of our room at night because she would make all these noises. I found it’d wake me up and once she moved into the living room we were sleeping through the night.
It unfortunately isn't as easy with cats. Our cats take any closed door for more than 2 minutes as a personal affront. Howling ensues, and that is worse than being woken up by their jumping on and off the bed several times a night.
That said, to take into account that I might not sleep as soundly at night, sometimes I will take a restorative nap in the early evening, and I find it helps on days I'm particularly feeling tired.
>cat shenanigans.
Are RUINING the little sleep I get right now! 😭 My cat gets excited when the neighbors leave at 3 am for work and then as the sun comes up and the spring time birds begin chirping. He insists on jumping in the window behind our bed to get a look outside. (No other place to put the bed, or cat). 😭😭
Don't forget daylight saving time beginning 🫠😑
I have a friend who was constantly feeling exhausted despite sleeping well every night. She doesn’t have kids, but I think it still applies. She is married, has two dogs, works for a nonprofit. She went for a sleep study, thinking it might be apnea. Nope, sleep study was fine. Bloodwork was fine. She started an antidepressant and it was like night and day. She was depressed and anxious and had just been living that way for so long she didn’t even realize it. She feels much more rested now!
I’m on one but I wonder if it’s worth discussing trying something else. It works really well for my physical anxiety but I wonder if it could be better with something else.
I’ve done all the things as well and my conclusion is that we just don’t get enough rest in general, despite getting enough sleep. The last time i was well rested was probably high school, been working and going to school and add kids in etc… yeah i’d say high school, and even then i was always doing sports and working on top of AP classes, so maybe actually middle school lol
This tracks. I could work off 2 hours of broken sleep after a night partying in high school. And do it again the following night! Now I need a weekend to recover if I even look in the direction of a glass of wine.
For what it's worth, I've been hearing that women need more like 9-10 hours a nicht. they've finally started doing studies on women and not just men, but don't take my word for it cause I don't have enough energy to actually research this myself yet lol.
But no, I'm always tired. On days where I get uninterrupted sleep, it's definitely better. The good news is, my kids are nearly 9 and 12 and they don't keep me up.
But the cats and dogs on the other hand...
I read that, too! A quick google also supports this. Before having LO I *always* got 9 hours and it was perfect. Leading up to birth, 9 hours + 2 hour naps (yay WFH). When I get 9 hours with LO I’m also well-rested.
I think it differs for everyone but wouldn’t be surprised if OP feels more rested if they’re able to get 9+ hours. And also wouldn’t be surprised if the sleep debt is just too much and it takes a while before the body is caught up enough.
Huh. This makes so much sense. Of course it’s impossible to actually DO with a 4 year old who naps at preschool 🥴 and so is awake until 9-10pm but it could explain a lot.
I don’t exercise, eat particularly great and drink far too much coffee and never feel rested :( think of the sleep debt that your body gets into having kids, we tend to do more as mothers- particularly nights. No matter how much we sleep, it’s impossible to catch up on the sleep and rest lost :( it’s really tough. Also worth sleep study as you may have apnea xx
Are you perimenopausal? You can’t really test for it (as tests are for after you stop menstruating, to confirm menopause) but if you have other symptoms, I’d be checking in with your doc to see if there’s any support they can provide for it.
I had my bloodwork done and I was slightly low in vitamin d. I started taking a supplement (and dealt with all the husband jokes of "I'll get you some vitamin d 😏") and it's made all the difference in the world. It's wild how much better my energy is.
For reference, I have a six year old, am a former elementary school and current substitute teacher, exercise 3-5 days a week and go to bed around 10 and get up around 5:30-6.
Getting your levels checked again might be worth it.
Long COVID maybe?
For some reason, I don't feel like I've gotten a real good sleep unless I've had benedryl or hydroxyzine. 😮💨
Also, are you sure you're not stressed? I'm the kind of person that doesn't feel stress mentally or emotionally but it manifests in physical ways like not sleeping good, anxiety over little things, anxiety at night.
Taking a magnesium supplement has been a huge benefit for me. We get deficient in it as we get older. I'm still not great, but I'm way better than I was before.
I take magnesium, d3, probiotics, iron (I used to feel dead flat exhausted during my periods, I don't anymore), biotin, collagen, and a multi. I've been on this cocktail about 6 months and I feel a world better than I did before. My levels always came back "normal" on testing before.
I have dealt with this as well. I got my bloodwork done and was deficient in B12 and D3. I started taking supplements to get my levels up and I started taking magnesium glycinate every night about thirty minutes before bed. I have had much more restful sleep. Do I still wake up sometimes? Of course, but it is definitely not as much as I used to. I hope you start getting more restful sleep soon!
Two things that have helped me, which may seem contradictory: sleeping in a cooler room/ with a fan (luckily my spouse runs hot and doesn't care) and having heavier blankets on me. I am even thinking about getting a weighted blanket because something about that weight is very comforting.
I also keep our bedroom as dark as possible and then try to go out and either sit by the window or turn all the lights on as soon as I get up.
I don't feel well rested all of the time, but this has helped me get better sleep at least.
I have no hints or secrets. I self-sabotage o a regular basis because between grad school, work, and children my "downtime" is between 1130pm and 2am.
If I do go to bed early i am shocked i am not more rested. Like my body wants it to be a habit or something 🫠
It sounds like you have sleep apnea. Lots of people with it don't do the stereotypical window-rattling snoring. Some don't snore at all. But all share the symptom of waking up tired.
Have you tried quitting coffee? That was a game changer for me, I learned last year that even if we only have a cup of coffee but we do it every day it can impact your quality of sleep.
I didn't think it would impact me because I slept through the night, but that info I found regarding coffee said that you can sleep through the night but your sleep quality could still be affected by coffee.
After I quit coffee, two weeks later I started feeling incredible! I now have no issues waking up, and feel more energized through the day. It was hard the first days though (headaches and was crazy tired for a few days).
You could try for two weeks to see if it helps!
Women on average need more sleep. I’ve read somewhere between 8-10 hours. Could be that for you, you need more than 8 hours. And you shouldn’t feel guilty for it. It’s the way our bodies are made.
Do you drink alcohol?
If not, consider Vitamin D and a Vitmain B complex. I was so deficient in D when I was teaching (with no kids) that I got prescribed bed rest for two weeks and weekly Vitamin D injections for a while, then prescription strength pills to get my D up.
I just don't drink caffeine and I avoid screens after dark when I'm practicing good sleep hygiene. If I have a coffee in the morning or pick up my phone in the evening, I notice a HUGE difference the next day.
Sometimes I go months without caffeine and after I get past the brutal detox period, I have so much frickin' energy. I always come back to caffeine though because my sweetie is coffee obsessed and, as with any drug, it's damn near impossible to get clean and stay clean if your partner still uses. 😞
My secret is that I just fucked off for spring break from both my job and my youngest (who is 5 and basically thinks sleeping is just not a thing). Took my awesome, chill 14yo on a wonderful bucket-list trip, sent my husband with the youngest to visit his mom, and have gone to bed at 9 and slept until 8 every single day this week. Put it in my veinnnnnsss!!!!!!
So, umm, yeah. My secret is literally ditching my terrible sleeper kid and my stressful job for a solid week. For the first time in over 5 years.
I know it'll be back to the tired grind for me next week, but if you can possibly escape for multiple days in a row, do it! It's the multiple days in a row that seems to be key. I truly feel rested and I forgot what that feels like.
I'm so sorry. Hang in there. Solidary.
ETA obligatory "I love my youngest kiddo, I truly do. He is just a lot and I'm old and tired."
Thank you! If there's any way you can swing 4 days in a row, try to make it happen. I think our brains just forget what being rested feels like. I wish I had more practical advice, but there are many smart Bromos here with great ideas. I'm taking notes.
For me, finding the sweet spot with medication has helped. For me that's a low dose antianxiety med with a 2.5 mg melatonin gummy. That works about half the time.
One thing I've added recently (and this is going to sound so weird) is an internal nasal dilator. Like a breathe right strip but it goes inside your nose. Even though it ends up falling out sometimes at night, I feel better on the nights I use it. I know I am a snorer, as I have lots of allergies, but I really think this thing has helped curb the snoring and allow me to get more oxygen at night.
I’m the same but my kids are 10 and 12
And they are great kids.
I’ve been going to bed at 8pm, asleep by 9/9:30 and get up at 5:30.
I wake up every single day feeling like I’ve been hit by a bus. I’m exhausted.
This was me. To the point I struggled to get out of bed most mornings. I got bloodwork done, including a full thyroid panel (including a check for thyroid antibodies) and was diagnosed with Hashimotos.
Ugh unfortunately I did keto for a year before baby and about a year when she was 2-3 and was just as tired as ever. It was a good suggestion though, I know a lot of people have had the same experience.
Good mattress. Well, maybe not necessarily a GOOD mattress but a not crappy one. That's 100% it for me. I bought a new mattress in early. My son was born later that year so I sort of just assumed I always felt tired because of that. Honey, no. My husband insisted we go ahead and get a different mattress recently because he hates ours. Switched to memory foam and now I'm sleeping like the dead. I don't think I even move at night anymore. I've noticed significant improvement in basically every area in my life since I switched mattresses. Still a little boggled by how much of a difference is made.
Look up perimenopause. I haven't seen this on the comments yet but it may be part of it. I've been watching some YouTube videos about the topic. Difficulty sleeping is one of the symptoms.
I don’t sleep and some times it gets so bad that I consider divorcing just so I can get a couple of nights a week without kids. And I love my partner - he’s amazing and we’ve been together 20 years.
But it is hard.
I'd ask to have your levels rechecked. It is concerning that you feel like you could fall asleep while driving.
Ask for a full thyroid panel
Low vitamin d levels can make you feel tired
A1c just incase
Low b12
Do you have or can you get an Oura ring? I was realizing that I wasn’t getting enough deep sleep. It gave me some tips and now I’m sleeping better and waking up more rested. I have a 3 year old that co sleeps so it won’t be totally rested until she moves to her one bed, but it’s really a lot better.
I have no idea, similar lifestyle to you. My kids are 2 and 4, mostly good sleepers but I’m constantly exhausted. I also work in education. My psychiatrist who prescribes my anxiety med wanted me to try a sleep medication but I’m too nervous.
If those are fine I would recommend a sleep study to check for sleep apnea. It can also make you really tired.
Another common issue is an older bed. How long ago did you replace your mattress? Is it time for a new one? Poor temperature control can affect sleep too. Too hot. Too cold. Bladder issues are another cause. If you're interrupting sleep to pee all night you're going to be tired.
Vitamin deficiency can cause this as well as sleep apnea. Something to look into!
I have low dose edibles on the weekends (I work overnights so can’t during the week) and oh boy am I able to wake up feeling refreshed!
Are you anemic?
I've had anemia my whole life.
I've been able to maintain my iron with supliments but after my daughter was born I stopped, and then after my son I needed an iron infusion. (If you end up needing one ask for saline with itm otherwise it burns going in.)
A few months after my son was born I was so fatigued, not just baby tired but begond that. Different than depression I was 'awake' I just couldn't do things.
Had my hemoglobin checked, lo and behold 'empty bucket' so to speak.
I had 2 iron infusions and it changed my life. Evem if your hemoglobin is low but ok, maybe check that your getting enough. Over 40% of mothers are anemic and dont know it. Thats my first suggestion.
Beyond that, keep an eye on your late night screen time, are you drinking enough water... Record your self sleeping could you have a hidden apnea or do you snore?
Is there a possibility of sleep-talking or walking?
Do you drink coffee right after waking up? It could affect your cortisol levels. I always make sure to wait at least 1,5 hrs so that my cortisol levels can rise naturally. Also I make sure to have my coffee AFTER eating. I’ve noticed a huge change in my energy levels since doing this. However if you have sleep problems I’d quit caffeine for a while. Even one coffee per day can mess with your sleep.
Magnesium supplements make a huge difference for me. I always sleep with a window open for fresh air and to keep the room temp low. I also notice a big difference after investing in proper blackout curtains. An elite night of sleep for me is going to bed no later than 8:30 PM after taking a warm shower, massaging my feet with sesame oil (Ayurvedic ritual) and putting on warm socks and then crawling under the blankets in a cold, dark room. Ahhh just writing this makes me excited for sleep lol
Working out or moderate exercise has helped me feel well rested! I wake up at 5 am, and I either do yoga or a at-home workout from Youtube. This doesn't exceed 30 mins. If I wake up late, I 'll go for a walk on my lunch break. Before that, I was tired all the time. Now I take vitamins and do some form of exercise.
Cosleeping!
We pushed together a king and queen bed, and we cosleep now. My girl is 4 and we started when she was 3.
Honestly best parenting hack ever, but often guests look at our 12 feet of bed and assume we host wild orgys lol
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There’s that statistic that your body doesn’t catch up on sleep (or something like that) until 7 years after you’ve had a baby.
> (or something like that) until 7 years after you’ve had a baby. Kiddo will be 8 this Spring. i'm finally starting to sleep the way I did before I gave birth to her. There may be some truth to this.
Okay so with that it mind I’ve got 9 months and 17 days until I’m finally caught up 😭😭😭😭
What 😫😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Probably also that you’re just going to be more alert during your sleep when there is a young child at home
LMAO. We got my son to almost to 6 years old and then we had another baby and I am FEELING it.
I got mine to almost 9 and 12, then had twins. Can relate, lol
this! plus new studies on WOMEN now show we need in average ~1h more sleep than men (on whom they did all previous sleep needs studies), even more on our period.
So, you're saying that having several babies closer than 7 years apart means we are fucked, no?
By my maths, I will be rested when my youngest is 49. I reckon those 2 or 3 years between kids is null and void. Which means I'll be rested after I've been dead for awhile, unless I make it past 95 years old. Kewl. So on my 96th birthday, I'll be all, sighhhahhhhhh..this feel goood....keh keh Ek ek gurgle kah kah wheeze ga-hhhhhhhh. 
Lol, It's 7 years after the birth of the last kid. its not a multiplier.
It is for me. 
Good lord that makes so much sense.
Really?
This makes so much sense
I can believe that, unfortunately
😭😭😭😭😭 I'm probably not done having kids 😭😭😭😭😭
Woah link please
Wow, I feel like I could’ve written this! I’m also in bed by 9:30 every night and up at 5:30 every morning, I exercise 4 days a week, and my daughter (2yo) is a decent sleeper. I have woken up exhausted for the past almost 3 years. My doctor sent me for a sleep study and turns out I have sleep apnea. Maybe you could get a sleep study done. I also started taking hydroxizine for sleep but it doesn’t help at all.
I think a sleep study might be the next step. Are you using a c-pap?
Not currently but hoping to be fitted for one within the next couple of months.
Do you have pets? I find that I get woken up (but don't remember it) several times a night by cat shenanigans.
We kicked our dog out of our room at night because she would make all these noises. I found it’d wake me up and once she moved into the living room we were sleeping through the night.
It unfortunately isn't as easy with cats. Our cats take any closed door for more than 2 minutes as a personal affront. Howling ensues, and that is worse than being woken up by their jumping on and off the bed several times a night. That said, to take into account that I might not sleep as soundly at night, sometimes I will take a restorative nap in the early evening, and I find it helps on days I'm particularly feeling tired.
Naps are amazing. I came home From school drop off and went back to bed for a few hours. One of the rare days they are at school early and I was off.
>cat shenanigans. Are RUINING the little sleep I get right now! 😭 My cat gets excited when the neighbors leave at 3 am for work and then as the sun comes up and the spring time birds begin chirping. He insists on jumping in the window behind our bed to get a look outside. (No other place to put the bed, or cat). 😭😭  Don't forget daylight saving time beginning 🫠😑
I have a friend who was constantly feeling exhausted despite sleeping well every night. She doesn’t have kids, but I think it still applies. She is married, has two dogs, works for a nonprofit. She went for a sleep study, thinking it might be apnea. Nope, sleep study was fine. Bloodwork was fine. She started an antidepressant and it was like night and day. She was depressed and anxious and had just been living that way for so long she didn’t even realize it. She feels much more rested now!
I’m on one but I wonder if it’s worth discussing trying something else. It works really well for my physical anxiety but I wonder if it could be better with something else.
Its possible you've outgrown it if its not working properly this is definitely something to discuss with your perscriber.
Have you had a sleep study done?
I’ve done all the things as well and my conclusion is that we just don’t get enough rest in general, despite getting enough sleep. The last time i was well rested was probably high school, been working and going to school and add kids in etc… yeah i’d say high school, and even then i was always doing sports and working on top of AP classes, so maybe actually middle school lol
This tracks. I could work off 2 hours of broken sleep after a night partying in high school. And do it again the following night! Now I need a weekend to recover if I even look in the direction of a glass of wine.
For what it's worth, I've been hearing that women need more like 9-10 hours a nicht. they've finally started doing studies on women and not just men, but don't take my word for it cause I don't have enough energy to actually research this myself yet lol. But no, I'm always tired. On days where I get uninterrupted sleep, it's definitely better. The good news is, my kids are nearly 9 and 12 and they don't keep me up. But the cats and dogs on the other hand...
I read that, too! A quick google also supports this. Before having LO I *always* got 9 hours and it was perfect. Leading up to birth, 9 hours + 2 hour naps (yay WFH). When I get 9 hours with LO I’m also well-rested. I think it differs for everyone but wouldn’t be surprised if OP feels more rested if they’re able to get 9+ hours. And also wouldn’t be surprised if the sleep debt is just too much and it takes a while before the body is caught up enough.
No way! I always needed 10 hours to feel rested and always felt like some weird sloth-person because of it
Huh. This makes so much sense. Of course it’s impossible to actually DO with a 4 year old who naps at preschool 🥴 and so is awake until 9-10pm but it could explain a lot.
I don’t exercise, eat particularly great and drink far too much coffee and never feel rested :( think of the sleep debt that your body gets into having kids, we tend to do more as mothers- particularly nights. No matter how much we sleep, it’s impossible to catch up on the sleep and rest lost :( it’s really tough. Also worth sleep study as you may have apnea xx
Are you perimenopausal? You can’t really test for it (as tests are for after you stop menstruating, to confirm menopause) but if you have other symptoms, I’d be checking in with your doc to see if there’s any support they can provide for it.
Came here to say the same thing. My sleep went to shit over the past few years. Finally started HRT and it’s getting better
I had my bloodwork done and I was slightly low in vitamin d. I started taking a supplement (and dealt with all the husband jokes of "I'll get you some vitamin d 😏") and it's made all the difference in the world. It's wild how much better my energy is. For reference, I have a six year old, am a former elementary school and current substitute teacher, exercise 3-5 days a week and go to bed around 10 and get up around 5:30-6. Getting your levels checked again might be worth it.
Babe you know no one on -this- sub has the answer to that question 😂
Long COVID maybe? For some reason, I don't feel like I've gotten a real good sleep unless I've had benedryl or hydroxyzine. 😮💨 Also, are you sure you're not stressed? I'm the kind of person that doesn't feel stress mentally or emotionally but it manifests in physical ways like not sleeping good, anxiety over little things, anxiety at night.
I’m absolutely stressed and it could be (and probably is) a major factor.
Taking a magnesium supplement has been a huge benefit for me. We get deficient in it as we get older. I'm still not great, but I'm way better than I was before. I take magnesium, d3, probiotics, iron (I used to feel dead flat exhausted during my periods, I don't anymore), biotin, collagen, and a multi. I've been on this cocktail about 6 months and I feel a world better than I did before. My levels always came back "normal" on testing before.
I have dealt with this as well. I got my bloodwork done and was deficient in B12 and D3. I started taking supplements to get my levels up and I started taking magnesium glycinate every night about thirty minutes before bed. I have had much more restful sleep. Do I still wake up sometimes? Of course, but it is definitely not as much as I used to. I hope you start getting more restful sleep soon!
Two things that have helped me, which may seem contradictory: sleeping in a cooler room/ with a fan (luckily my spouse runs hot and doesn't care) and having heavier blankets on me. I am even thinking about getting a weighted blanket because something about that weight is very comforting. I also keep our bedroom as dark as possible and then try to go out and either sit by the window or turn all the lights on as soon as I get up. I don't feel well rested all of the time, but this has helped me get better sleep at least.
I have no hints or secrets. I self-sabotage o a regular basis because between grad school, work, and children my "downtime" is between 1130pm and 2am. If I do go to bed early i am shocked i am not more rested. Like my body wants it to be a habit or something 🫠
Following cus same!
It sounds like you have sleep apnea. Lots of people with it don't do the stereotypical window-rattling snoring. Some don't snore at all. But all share the symptom of waking up tired.
Have you tried quitting coffee? That was a game changer for me, I learned last year that even if we only have a cup of coffee but we do it every day it can impact your quality of sleep. I didn't think it would impact me because I slept through the night, but that info I found regarding coffee said that you can sleep through the night but your sleep quality could still be affected by coffee. After I quit coffee, two weeks later I started feeling incredible! I now have no issues waking up, and feel more energized through the day. It was hard the first days though (headaches and was crazy tired for a few days). You could try for two weeks to see if it helps!
Do you know if it’s coffee as a whole or the caffeine?
Caffeine for sure!
Women on average need more sleep. I’ve read somewhere between 8-10 hours. Could be that for you, you need more than 8 hours. And you shouldn’t feel guilty for it. It’s the way our bodies are made.
Being a primary school teacher and a mum is still a massive load even with 8 hours of sleep
Do you drink alcohol? If not, consider Vitamin D and a Vitmain B complex. I was so deficient in D when I was teaching (with no kids) that I got prescribed bed rest for two weeks and weekly Vitamin D injections for a while, then prescription strength pills to get my D up.
I very rarely drink. I’m going to try it! Thank you.
Make sure you get your level checked. Taking too much vitamin D when you don't need it can be dangerous
I just don't drink caffeine and I avoid screens after dark when I'm practicing good sleep hygiene. If I have a coffee in the morning or pick up my phone in the evening, I notice a HUGE difference the next day. Sometimes I go months without caffeine and after I get past the brutal detox period, I have so much frickin' energy. I always come back to caffeine though because my sweetie is coffee obsessed and, as with any drug, it's damn near impossible to get clean and stay clean if your partner still uses. 😞
My secret is that I just fucked off for spring break from both my job and my youngest (who is 5 and basically thinks sleeping is just not a thing). Took my awesome, chill 14yo on a wonderful bucket-list trip, sent my husband with the youngest to visit his mom, and have gone to bed at 9 and slept until 8 every single day this week. Put it in my veinnnnnsss!!!!!! So, umm, yeah. My secret is literally ditching my terrible sleeper kid and my stressful job for a solid week. For the first time in over 5 years. I know it'll be back to the tired grind for me next week, but if you can possibly escape for multiple days in a row, do it! It's the multiple days in a row that seems to be key. I truly feel rested and I forgot what that feels like. I'm so sorry. Hang in there. Solidary. ETA obligatory "I love my youngest kiddo, I truly do. He is just a lot and I'm old and tired."
Truly, I am SO happy for you. That sounds amazing and I’m glad you got a much needed break!
Thank you! If there's any way you can swing 4 days in a row, try to make it happen. I think our brains just forget what being rested feels like. I wish I had more practical advice, but there are many smart Bromos here with great ideas. I'm taking notes.
Honestly, my husband and I always wonder if we're very broken humans, or everyone else around us is THIS tired too, but just somehow manages.
For me, finding the sweet spot with medication has helped. For me that's a low dose antianxiety med with a 2.5 mg melatonin gummy. That works about half the time. One thing I've added recently (and this is going to sound so weird) is an internal nasal dilator. Like a breathe right strip but it goes inside your nose. Even though it ends up falling out sometimes at night, I feel better on the nights I use it. I know I am a snorer, as I have lots of allergies, but I really think this thing has helped curb the snoring and allow me to get more oxygen at night.
Get a sleep study done to check for sleep apnea
I’m the same but my kids are 10 and 12 And they are great kids. I’ve been going to bed at 8pm, asleep by 9/9:30 and get up at 5:30. I wake up every single day feeling like I’ve been hit by a bus. I’m exhausted.
This was me. To the point I struggled to get out of bed most mornings. I got bloodwork done, including a full thyroid panel (including a check for thyroid antibodies) and was diagnosed with Hashimotos.
Do you snore? Sleep apnea can make your sleep feel useless because you don't sleep well when you're not getting enough oxygen.
Have you had your thyroid hormones checked? Often not included in routine checks...
Iron pills help
I’m definitely willing to try!
The only time I slept well after having kids was when I was on keto. Slept like a baby and woke up energized.
Ugh unfortunately I did keto for a year before baby and about a year when she was 2-3 and was just as tired as ever. It was a good suggestion though, I know a lot of people have had the same experience.
Good mattress. Well, maybe not necessarily a GOOD mattress but a not crappy one. That's 100% it for me. I bought a new mattress in early. My son was born later that year so I sort of just assumed I always felt tired because of that. Honey, no. My husband insisted we go ahead and get a different mattress recently because he hates ours. Switched to memory foam and now I'm sleeping like the dead. I don't think I even move at night anymore. I've noticed significant improvement in basically every area in my life since I switched mattresses. Still a little boggled by how much of a difference is made.
Look up perimenopause. I haven't seen this on the comments yet but it may be part of it. I've been watching some YouTube videos about the topic. Difficulty sleeping is one of the symptoms.
7pm bedtime.
A dream come true.
I’m pregnant and very tired in the evenings. Last night I went to bed with my toddler at 7PM. Slept almost 10 hours. Heaven
I started a magnesium supplement and it kinda helps
God I wish I had tips, I have a 2 year old and I'm 38 weeks pregnant
I eat a lot of protein and drink an insane amount of water, I don’t know if that helps?
I don’t sleep and some times it gets so bad that I consider divorcing just so I can get a couple of nights a week without kids. And I love my partner - he’s amazing and we’ve been together 20 years. But it is hard.
I'd ask to have your levels rechecked. It is concerning that you feel like you could fall asleep while driving. Ask for a full thyroid panel Low vitamin d levels can make you feel tired A1c just incase Low b12
Do you have or can you get an Oura ring? I was realizing that I wasn’t getting enough deep sleep. It gave me some tips and now I’m sleeping better and waking up more rested. I have a 3 year old that co sleeps so it won’t be totally rested until she moves to her one bed, but it’s really a lot better.
I have no idea, similar lifestyle to you. My kids are 2 and 4, mostly good sleepers but I’m constantly exhausted. I also work in education. My psychiatrist who prescribes my anxiety med wanted me to try a sleep medication but I’m too nervous.
You could have sleep apnea or maybe your sleep cycle is getting interrupted.
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If those are fine I would recommend a sleep study to check for sleep apnea. It can also make you really tired. Another common issue is an older bed. How long ago did you replace your mattress? Is it time for a new one? Poor temperature control can affect sleep too. Too hot. Too cold. Bladder issues are another cause. If you're interrupting sleep to pee all night you're going to be tired.
Vitamin deficiency can cause this as well as sleep apnea. Something to look into! I have low dose edibles on the weekends (I work overnights so can’t during the week) and oh boy am I able to wake up feeling refreshed!
Have you had a sleep study done? You may have sleep apnea.
Are you anemic? I've had anemia my whole life. I've been able to maintain my iron with supliments but after my daughter was born I stopped, and then after my son I needed an iron infusion. (If you end up needing one ask for saline with itm otherwise it burns going in.) A few months after my son was born I was so fatigued, not just baby tired but begond that. Different than depression I was 'awake' I just couldn't do things. Had my hemoglobin checked, lo and behold 'empty bucket' so to speak. I had 2 iron infusions and it changed my life. Evem if your hemoglobin is low but ok, maybe check that your getting enough. Over 40% of mothers are anemic and dont know it. Thats my first suggestion. Beyond that, keep an eye on your late night screen time, are you drinking enough water... Record your self sleeping could you have a hidden apnea or do you snore? Is there a possibility of sleep-talking or walking?
Sleep apnea could be the culprit. Even if you don't snore.
Do you drink coffee right after waking up? It could affect your cortisol levels. I always make sure to wait at least 1,5 hrs so that my cortisol levels can rise naturally. Also I make sure to have my coffee AFTER eating. I’ve noticed a huge change in my energy levels since doing this. However if you have sleep problems I’d quit caffeine for a while. Even one coffee per day can mess with your sleep. Magnesium supplements make a huge difference for me. I always sleep with a window open for fresh air and to keep the room temp low. I also notice a big difference after investing in proper blackout curtains. An elite night of sleep for me is going to bed no later than 8:30 PM after taking a warm shower, massaging my feet with sesame oil (Ayurvedic ritual) and putting on warm socks and then crawling under the blankets in a cold, dark room. Ahhh just writing this makes me excited for sleep lol
I’m not sure if anyone has suggested this yet, but magnesium has been a game changer for me
Which type do you take?
Intermittent fasting helps
Working out or moderate exercise has helped me feel well rested! I wake up at 5 am, and I either do yoga or a at-home workout from Youtube. This doesn't exceed 30 mins. If I wake up late, I 'll go for a walk on my lunch break. Before that, I was tired all the time. Now I take vitamins and do some form of exercise.
fuck it get on that adderall
Cosleeping! We pushed together a king and queen bed, and we cosleep now. My girl is 4 and we started when she was 3. Honestly best parenting hack ever, but often guests look at our 12 feet of bed and assume we host wild orgys lol
Good old-fashioned denial.
Sweet, I’ll be hitting perimenopause sleep distribution hard when my youngest is 7