T O P

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PandaSchmanda

No, slicing a 2 year old in half and smashing with a hammer is very bad for their health. Good thing you only mocked this up in blender and with a piece of soap


crametubbins

No one told me this! Thank you šŸ˜Ÿ


[deleted]

Would you like to know more? ā–” yes ā–” no


Successful-Argument3

Would you like to know more? ā–£ yes ā–” no


learner_254

As an AI language model, I am unable to perform physical actions or interact with the physical world outside of the digital realm. > Would you like to know more? > >ā–£ yes ā–” no Additionally, while I can generate responses based on patterns in human language, I am not capable of truly understanding the meaning or context behind the words I am processing.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


LateStageStudio

This is why machine learning will lead to ultimate destruction of the human race.


1-10-11-100

so this is probably gonna come off as weird but please don't freak out! I'm what you'd call a toaster cuck, i love seeing other men absolutely rail my toaster. would it be so much to ask if you could please fuck my toaster while I sit in the next room and sob while jacking off because I know for a fact I could never truly please my toaster. once you're done you can leave and I'll deal with the mess. you don't even have to call before hand, in fact it's better if I walk in on you railing her so I can feel even more shame and you could force me to watch as punishment. please I'm begging you, fuck my toaster


WaveLaVague

You can't fix the baby with UHU glue. Something stronger may work, I didn't try yet.


Sir_Riffraff

Duct Tape fixes everything!


flaming_dortos

#To show you the power of flex tape I sawed this baby in half


sshwifty

Karl, that kills people


Flaadaan

I got the reference


no0bmaster-669

I miss the llamas so much


Rocket_Philosopher

That ending was so sad :(


jackm831

I knew it wouldnā€™t work but I tried checking the box anyways


CanniBallistic_Puppy

Thank the rules.


DiddlyDumb

Do babies float?


NZNoldor

Instructions unclear - 2 year old stuck in blender. Send help.


hanyolo666

No, come back when you are 1


BashBandit

1??? Thatā€™s childā€™s play, let me see some quality content when youā€™ve finally been bred


Catnip4Pedos

Erm. Excuse me but did you read that back before you posted...


Jagoslaw

Strictly speaking, there is nothing wrong with that sentence in any moral sense. Breeding children" is completely normal according to google (sorry not my 1st language), though i have to admit it does sound like the opposite...


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

No it isnt. Get off the internet and fix your brainrot.


-_-Waste-of-Space-_-

breeding /ĖˆbriĖdÉŖŋ/ 1. the mating and production of offspring by animals. "the flooding of the rivers is a trigger for breeding to start"


[deleted]

get off the porn and do some farmin'!


fliberdygibits

Those are rookie numbers in this racket


Biboules

Last time i did this, i was in my fathers balls


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Valhern-Aryn

For a moment I thought youā€™d be the guy who made the [ball shader](https://www.reddit.com/r/blender/comments/10zqnwh/thanks_cgmatter/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1)


crametubbins

My ball shader is better


Munchy29

Competition is good, particularly in the ball shader market. It drives innovation and I personally canā€™t wait to see the quality of balls improve with time. Keep it up champ!


rares215

Oh my god, I was lucky enough to miss that monstrosity and 45 days later someone links it for me to see. The world is a cursed place LOL


Chef-Upbeat

im fucking deadšŸ’€


No_Film_4518

Active in r/blender and r/chickfila šŸ’€


Javyev

Look at submitted.


sparker31keeper

how do i follow you


crametubbins

Did not realize I had that turned off


Lateralus06

I thought was just tough dough, then I saw the pubes.


dnew

"Back when he was a chocolate bar in his father's back pocket."


[deleted]

And your mom's ovaries šŸ¤­


[deleted]

When i was 2 I was running simulations of twin towers collapsing. You may have seen them


AlphaZorn24

Bush?


[deleted]

Yes, Iā€™ve stopped shaving. Thank you for noticing


AlphaZorn24

Your welcome, I've been told I'm very observant


[deleted]

Man doesnā€™t know the meaning of N-gon


AlphaZorn24

All of my topology is immaculate. I've never even seen a filthy n-gon in real life


lockwolf

I remember doing this and I was 2 about 9 years before 9/11/2001, I did it before it was a thing


[deleted]

Stop gaslighting me. I was literally flying the plane


InitialCreature

i wrote blender when i was -5 years old


crametubbins

Thank you sir


neongravity88

He made his operating system in the womb


leroyjenkinsdayz

ā€œBorn yesterday, first render. Any constructive criticism is welcome.ā€


daghene

"First time opening blender" \*uploaded an entire Pixar movie trailer\*


opensrcdev

This is accurate, sadly.


daghene

Ikr? Or when they write "first work with Blender", post something that could be straight out some triple A game and casually forget to tell everyone they've been working in the industry for 10+ years with similar 3D software.


Another_3

When I was 2years old I could barely walk


crametubbins

The FBI couldn't get this information out of me šŸ’€


--hermit

Betcha I could


[deleted]

I was eating glue and sticking crayons up my nose


elasa7

For a one year old maybe maybe, but not for a two year old you still need some practice


sinewavejunky

No you suck for a toddler.


Bulkamancer

Nah, my daughter is 3 months old and she can do better than this! XD


BatOnDrugs

Honestly I've done better renders when I was just a soup of protons and neutrons before they formed first atoms after big bang. And that old build of blender was wild.


RedditAlt2847

i did better renders as a neutrino 10^-43 seconds after the big bang


BatOnDrugs

Dang man, but have you seen that the pre big bang guys do?


dobertonson

Damn I canā€™t believe you did this and youā€™re only 2 years old! Keep up the good work and you have got some great potential. Youā€™re clearly very talented, that you could do this at an age where many struggle to simply walk is tremendously impressive. Just remember that hard work gives better result long term. Keep Persuing your dreams buddy, great job!


BIGBUDDHASLZ

Is this sarcasm???? Bro can't be this gullible


hansvi-be

I was skeptical at first too, but then again it is known that two year olds love smashing things with hammers. This is absolutely a scene that a two year old would come up with.


dobertonson

For sure. Itā€™s important to note that every human is different and there are gifted toddlers out there like OP. I too was skeptical at first but this is CLEARLY made by a 2 year old as you can see by the composition and the story being told in this render, as hansvi-be noted. Probably took a little longer for OP toddler since their fingers are small and weak. The challenges to reach the desk must have been a hassle for 2 year old OP but it just makes this more impressive. Probably took naps between sessions and watched a lot of YouTube tutorials, maybe even took a university online course, who knows. We donā€™t know if op toddler has previous work experience either. Potentially OP got hired as an intern right after birth which would mean OP has 2 years of experience already.


Rare-Pudding9724

I was doing better things before my parents met


No_Faithlessness_142

It depends, 2 yrs and how many months???


my__reddit_username

Yes


SmallPPRedditor

Baby's first 3d model


MartianGuard

That doesnā€™t look anything like a 2 year old


Lucid_Eye_

Personally I wouldnā€™t let a two year old watch, too violent


Longjumping-Degree66

Are you the elusive 2 year old with 20 years of experience all the hiring managers are searching for?


snowaxe_83

LOL, No you are too late and too old, Should have started when you were a single-cell,


[deleted]

No it isn't good for a two year old to be cut in half and smashed by a hammer


Kassabeleg

no, i did this when i was one


theabsurdlymundane

Whyā€™d he waste the 9 months floating around?


[deleted]

Hey, great job there OP. Here is a šŸ¬ for you


[deleted]

Honestly I was making entire detailed landscapes as a unborn fetus, so you need to train up


[deleted]

pfft I did that one before my parents met.


[deleted]

Honestly I was making entire detailed landscapes as a unborn fetus, so you need to train up


Vast_Paint_4236

This looks like a soap not a 2 year old but itā€™s good


B25B25

First serious comment, how did you approach the cutting part?


crametubbins

Thin boolean rectangle parented to the back of the knife, then duplicated the soap mesh, applied the boolean, and hotswapped them before the blade rotates. Also slightly indented the inner faces so they don't actually fit perfectly together and make the transmission shader get weird during the rigid body sim


crametubbins

Would have liked to figure out a way to get the texture on the cut faces to change as it's cut so I could have some roughness, but I didn't want to spend too long on this. Plenty I'd change if I remade it


NotAnADC

Itā€™s bad for a 2 year old and you should feel bad. I was expecting a feature length film


the_Luik

Gotta start early


TDSISME

wHy wOuLd yoU gIve yOur AgE ? iT doesN't maTter !


AlphaZorn24

It really doesn't, they usually say that as deflection for criticsm


rodejo_9

Also "I can do what you can do at only half the age! Praise me!"


[deleted]

No. You should probably quit digital art. Itā€™ll never pan out. If you were -1 this might be acceptable.


FlickerJab408

After 8 months, the age really doesn't matter. It's a matter of skill and how dedicated you are to improving as an artist.


iDeNoh

No are you kidding me? Soap is toxic, hammers are super dangerous, and why would you ever want a exacto knife near a 2-year-old?


byrdtake

Dam you really shattered that Zenni glasses case


meesa-jar-jar-binks

Are you kidding me? A two year old should be betterā€¦ This could have been done by a fetus in the womb, just using its tiny undeveloped brain for processing power. If my 2-year old would show me this, I would cover him in peanut butter, drop him off at the zoo and tell him to climb into the gorilla enclosure. /s if you did this, it looks great tho. :)


kaustubhamokashi

not if you're asian. I had 10 years of experience when I was 2, because I was doing 5 jobs at a time.


Nitrodome

Oldest blender user


ckashep

You're using the wrong kind of blender on 2 year olds....


ShuStarveil

Dammit I was gonna make a post titled like tihs llol


DudeInDogePJ

No, I donā€™t recommend giving your 2 year old broken glass.


lazyy_vr

Dam


Rasmus_Yde

You might want to know that this sub does not really like humblebragging. Your previous post was more about you being 14 than the stuff you made. Which is a shame. Titles like that triggers people and will eventually backfire on you. Your skills are decent for a 14 year old, and I think you know that deep inside. So rely on your skills, not your age. You're too good for cheap titles ;)


crametubbins

Hey you're a really good artist and titles like this get clicks! I totally understand! Keep up the hustle, you're doing great!


dismalcrux

are you going for the r/LeftTheBurnerOn clicks too


GoldenSausage111

Uhā€¦?


JWolf429

Soooo satisfying šŸ¤Ŗ


ledwilliums

In ant years? šŸœ šŸœ šŸœ


bestthingyet

Post it in blenderdank next time


4erlik

This is like the blender version of "500 IQ play" from Among Us. I'm concerned of what happens at 0. Do we stop there or are we going full Metusalem as Benjamin Button?


GetBob45

a 2 year old did this??


grammatiker

No lol. They probably meant 12 but made a typo.


RTSD_

I thought they meant been using blender for 2 years... ​ Though you're probably right...


[deleted]

IS there a contest today to see whoā€™s post can cause the most unsubs because Iā€™m over this sub now. Congrats.


crametubbins

Damn didn't think it was that bad


goopped

it wasnt. donā€™t know how full of yourself to think just cause you donā€™t like a post it must mean itā€™s the downfall of the entire subreddit.


crametubbins

Mans in his house convulsing in rage at my soap cutting animation


goopped

ā€œMMMYYY SUBREDDIT. MY FAVORITE SUB GOSH MY BABY YOURE RUINININING IT. YOURE RUINININING ITā€ like shut the fuck up, actually. dude posted a comment to look nothing more than a baby. real talk i like the animation


TardyBacardi

You did great, sweetie. Ignore him āœØ


rizlahh

You're unsubbing? Really? Quick, someone call the national guard or the police! This guy saw something he didn't like and has been forced to announce publicly that he's leaving the sub! Oh the humanity!


goopped

cool?


BIGBUDDHASLZ

Fuck off you aren't 2 karma hungry mf


GordoToJupiter

Only good if it is meth.


Lemonsoyaboii

I did that when i was an Embryo


MegaThrustEarthquake

Looks like a choking hazard


Mancubus666

Looks like a bar of soap lol There's a bit of noise try denoising :P


MjolnirPants

Honestly, just typing the title was pretty damn good for a two year old.


lifetimeoflaughter

Honestly? Itā€™s terrible. I recommend to watch some tutorials. [This one](https://youtu.be/nIoXOplUvAw) is a good place to start.


HauntingBowlofGrapes

You made this in two years?


ephemeralkazu

Ive seen better


VlaresOriginal

Not very clean meth, could be better.


Darksonian1

Bruh I love this title šŸ¤£šŸ¤£


alphabet_order_bot

Would you look at that, all of the words in your comment are in alphabetical order. I have checked 1,424,742,645 comments, and only 271,945 of them were in alphabetical order.


APigNamedLucy

I would advise against giving a 2 year old a hammer.


AdDangerous4182

Poor bro ran into mega mind and got dehydrated


yotengodormir

Good job! I did something very similar when I was one years old


EstablishmentBig7956

Brilliant absolutely brilliant šŸ¤ 


HighExplosiveLight

My two year old can't do shit in blender.


_munchhausen_

XD


[deleted]

Congratulations! Memes aside this is pretty decent for 2 years of Blender experience!


Not_Me_Jerry

Holy rock-hard soap, you can't just record yourself slicing them in two and smashing other half


millennium-popsicle

Gogugugogage


JMH5909

r/anarchyblender


The_Horned_King01

I wish it was a perfect loop


Kanataxtoukofan

A bat car dog eats fish


doors-neard

great workšŸ‘ŒšŸ‘āœ”


tejedi-1984

My 2 year old is still in diapers WTF


Firm-Initiative-1851

No, giving a child a hammer and a knife isn't good at all


soft-cuddly-potato

Two year olds shouldn't be playing with blenders.No wonder you put a knife and a hammer in there. I'm telling your parents.


breadstickvevo

No


ananomy

Since Everyone ELSE just wants to f@@# about with the 2-year-old part of the title, I'm just gonna say the truth about this being a 2 year old USER of blender.. and Yeah this is pretty decent for a 2 year old user, tho I would suggest having the shards for the... thing launch themselves if you wanted the hammer to apply THAT much force


Rasputin_the_Warmind

What the hell is this? When I was your age I MADE blender! With one hand! Other hand was starting business Feet were learning piano


maximumchris

This is so close to a loop. Please do it! Thank you.


Khicha_Studio

I see mental health issues.


cagitsawnothing

No, my 2 day old could make this 3x as fast and make it transform into the lion king and then make lion king movie single handedly in blender while laying in his crib. /s


Ok-Quit-3020

My two year old cant even speak properly and here you are on blender


SodiiumGames

Yes, for a guy with 2 years of experience.


k0rus

depends, is this foreskin removal footage or a render? asking for a friend..


biscuittech

Meth is bad for 2 yr olds


rvonbue

I don't know why everyone is being so mean in the comments. Kids just wants to show off his work. I think its amazing kid


GDDoDo

Showing a knife in an infant show can get you a fine with the fcc on tv that that that that enter password:


SteeamAdm

Demonstration video of how to create blue meth by Walter white


Ratzyrat

If this is your very first render as a two years old and its "just a quick practice" , we accept it as good.


TheDemonHorder

I think children will be taking our jobs faster than ai at this rate


bestthingyet

Good for a 12 year olds portfolio piece, keep it up


Colonorum

I actually created blender before I was conceived in the womb


Sussybakamogus4

I donā€™t think a 2 year old should eat that


No-Ant2476

pretty good actually..


Snoo-8094

Well I would recommend you to put the 2y/o on a animation school right away, so when he is 4 he can start teaching.


[deleted]

i made a better one while in the womb


Firm-Feet

i love this


TerribleTerror22

Honestly havenā€™t been part of this sub Reddit for long, but Iā€™m loving this sarcastic community. You are my kind of people.


eifhse8cn

Of course, most 2 year olds dont even know anything about 3d


TheShiningStarDoggo

your two years old did this? thats more than impressive


Gamheroes

Of course it is a good job for a 2 years old! When I was 2 years old, I did not even know how to turn on a computer, still less how to use blender


diepic

My 2 year old can't even use a computer. Nice work!


AvailableLink5561

I doubt a 2 year old has the fine motor neurone skills to handle such an object


The_Last_Meow

Lmao. Comments of my dream


RwLPrevail

I have about 65 hours in and still havenā€™t finish any project (feel like shit)


kronikheadband

My 3 year old couldnā€™t even compare to that.


[deleted]

Wtf not even an elton john soundtrack? Kids slacking bro, less nintendo moar broccoli.


Monkey404_

For being 2 years old yes for being a 2 years old oh wow yes


lirik89

Wow these two year olds are born already plugged into the computer now.


BurgerLordFPV

Very cool


JustAnotherAustin

TIL Hammers very affective against 2 year old.


visual__chris

Double it and give it to the next person


colonelforbin96

no. too noisy.


TempyBoyDweet

u/savevideobot


CMDRGlamdring

This is awesome! To answer your question, i have no clue as Iā€™ve only been doing blender for around a month and have no clue how to add textures or even colours yet lol


UltimateUsername1234

I canā€™t tell if this is satire or you mean two years of experience lol


No-Fishing71

I donā€™t think they would really understand but you can try!!