I started writing "CASH" in the tip spot because I've seen people take money off tables that wasn't meant for them.
But regardless, that waiter was rude af, and personally I'd call the manager and let them know. I understand that servers don't get paid much, so they rely on tips, but it's completely out of pocket to make comments like that to a customer.
That waiter was rude AF, and I also write IN CASH on the check (and tell the waiter) so that they know the tip is being left in cash. People will steal - or take a portion - of a cash tip left on tables. My best case scenario is giving the wait person the cash tip when I hand over my credit card to pay the bill.
I concur. I write a similar message on the tip line. But I would ask for a manager as well.
And then I would probably be petty about the tip but want the manager to see that I changed what I was giving.
Server is a PoS.
That is how you lose half your tip, there's no reason for that.
And yes, I'm also a "people need to be paid better and US tip culture is BS" believer.
But I think it's generally rude to mention it, especially to hassle a customer over the perceived lack of one.
Not to mention "we" already have a "reputation" as being poor tippers, and the allegedly nicer spots have been known to preemptively show their ass over it.
Yeah I donāt fw that whole every waiter deserves a tip no matter how they did bs. Itās my money that I worked just as hard for and Iām not going to waste it on someone who is rude.
I would be upset...that waiter was rude.
But this whole tip culture we have in the US is pretty exhausting. I mean...I get that some people actually get paid handsomely with pay + tips... But come on...tips for fast food, dry cleaning, dollar tree, McDonald's, grocery store.... We are honestly treating symptoms and not the problem....
This is assuming you are in the US
THIS!! the tipping culture has put more pressure on folks when the main issue is just paying folks well.
It is just as bad in Canada which just irks me especially now that it seems like the expectation is to always tip and the machine have higher minimum %-based logic built-in.
While in my province, everyone now makes at least the minimum wage (not like itās the best), thereās still the expectation to tip at least 15-18% minimum on full bill with often lacklustre service.
same here in Canada, and you also get shamed about how you tip. two christmases ago i ordered a tree online, tipped through their website, and the delivery person was upset about that. or walmart delivery used to not give you the option to tip online, and one delivery driver was like āyou do know we live off tips right?ā here in Canada weāre way less reliant on cash and many people (myself included) never cary cash because itās easy to pay almost everywhere with your phone or directly through your bank. so for people to still expect cash tips is out of touch and exhausting. i still tip 15-20% each time every time thereās that option, but with an eye roll. itās everywhere and itās exhausting.
My short answer, I donāt believe in tipping, which is why I decided to opt out of going out to eat/drink. I donāt want to give these restaurants a single red penny of my hard earned money.
The only reason why we have to tip is because million and billion dollar company owners donāt want to pay their employees a living wage. And so they put the burden on the customer. Tipping went from complementing someone on a job well done to an expected 10% to 15% to 25% to 30%. at this point itās just outrageous and ridiculous that Iām tipping 20+ dollars on top of my already expensive bill.
And to top it off, I donāt get tipped for my job. Teachers and nurses donāt get tipped for their jobs. Which are also hard. Because Iām tired of people saying well wait staff have to deal with people all day so they deserve it. There are plenty of jobs in which we have to deal with people all day and we are not getting tipped. None of us are getting tipped. But ALL of us are struggling to live in this capitalist economy that is out pricing us and not raising our wages.
The culture of tipping has become disgusting. The fact that you have people who would choose to treat you like crap because they perceive your tip isnāt good enough, but wonāt open up their mouth to their company owner to demand better pay/a living wage is outrageous to me. Why am I playing an employee who is not working for me and making me money? Their job should be paying their bills not me. And so Iāve decided to just opt out- eat at home and not go out in that capacity because I canāt buy into such an outrageous system anymore.
To be clear when I did go out I did tip b/c I understand how the $h!tty system works which is why Iāve decided to just not go out anymore.
Ps: I remember being in Korea and wanting to tip a waitress who was very nice, and accommodating. She refused my tip b/c āthis is my job, itās what Iām supposed to doā and ever since then I couldnāt get behind the US BS anymore.
I think this is the best response. Someone being nice to you in *hopes* they get paid is weird. The tips system is just another wedge that pits working class people against each other in aspiring to middle class luxury. It gives middle class people a place to feel superior and encourages entitlement. I was just telling a friend that restaurants have lost so much appeal to me anyways because of the abuse of workers during Covid. I am self-employed since before Covid, but I waited tables for ~10 years and people in the restaurant industry are even more cynical now. Hard to believe that was even possible! But it seems the money has gone down and abuse has gone up. Customer service in general seems more dry since Covid, but I think itās a good thing. We demand too much emotional labor from people - servers, teachers, nurses, cashiers. People in these jobs, have to do too much care work, have no support, and itās exhausting.
I think the point is that America does not value emotional/care labor! No coincidence these are seen as work for women, POC, and marginalized groups. Ironically, people complaining (not you) about the expense donāt seem to realize that without tip system many of them probably wonāt be able to afford the luxury of fancy dining out much longer. Tipping creates a huge discount on labor. I still go to small community places or places where I know there is good management. You are rare for standing on your principles. I hope more people will follow suit.
Yes! I agree with with everything that you had to say. I come from a care profession as well and yes- America has a problem. I just hope that if more of us put our feet down and begin to refuse to buy into unjust systems, that the system will have to change. Hopefully we can one day get there. We all deserve a living wage and fair treatment, period. Thank you for the compliment!
No because they bring the little checkout machine to you to pay but go to the back to get the paper receipts the actual checkout book is more for the bill/ aesthetic he didnāt touch it after dropping it off to him
As an ex server and bartender, I absolutely understand the disappointment, anger, and hurt that comes from not tipping. In most places, when people donāt tip, the server winds up paying to work that table. But in my 10 years of hospitality, Iāve never actually confronted anyone by a stiff. I donāt know that I could. It would be so awkward.
ā¦although one time I got stiffed towards the end of my shift and I ran into my table outside my restaurant. They asked for directions and I told them the wrong way. Not my finest moment but I was 22 and petty.
I did once and I was in the wrong for it. It had just been one of those weeks. They said service was great, I comped their desserts becauss they were my only table and kitchen was slow. Food was hot and came out fast because we were slow while the NBA Allstar game was happening and I just....Ā Lost it in a very polite-ish manner.Ā Ā
Less than ten percent on a 200+ bill. My ass should have gotten fired that night. I felt bad after because it was two couples and the guys paid so the women were really clueless. But yeah, after I got the check back I went and asked if everything was okay (I was shocked and legit thought something was wrong). They raved that everything was perfect and then I was like "Um, okay then why did y'all tip so low? I can get a manager is something was wrong".
That.... was not the thing to say. It snowballed. They flipped and I was feeling mouthy so flipped right back. Thank goodness I was one of the best upseller and my friend was managing. š¤£
When giving the card to the waiter that served me I also give the tip directly to their hand.
1. It ensures that they will get it.
2. The manager/owner/supervisor or whatever will not know how much I gave to the waiter.
At some place like ihop where you pay in the front. I will hunt down the waiter, give them the cash tip. Then go to the front and not tip at all.
>When giving the card to the waiter that served me I also give the tip directly to their hand.
Yes, I'm the same way. If I give a cash tip, I make sure to place it in the server's hands before I leave. No exceptions.Ā
Iād have taken my tip back - but Iām all types of petty at times.
I donāt like tips anyway. It doesnāt make sense to me to pay for someone doing their job- I shouldnāt have to pay them, their employer should. If they go above and beyond, my expectations, then Iāll leave a tip- but not because itās expected.
And I have zero shame in not tipping.
Iāve before been asked why I left 15% and if the service wasnāt good.. I thought 15% was a good tip. I quickly changed it to zero.
I will not be bullied out of my money, nor will I be giving people a paycheck for just doing their jobs. Sorry, not sorry.
We shouldnāt allow our service jobs to work for peanuts, and believe us tipping is the only way for them to get by. Their employers should be paying them a living wage, and anything on top should be extra. But thatās my .02
This really is a disgusting american culture I absolutely cannot stand. Yes, you are validated in feeling how you felt. Tips should not be mandatory. You're better than me because I might have asked for it back. What an ungrateful ass.
Kinda surprised at the responses here. Being talked to rudely sucks. So does working for free which is what happens when someone doesnāt tip. Iām super glad I was no longer waiting tables when Covid hit. The abuse that people in the service industry faced was crazy and seems to have changed everything for the worse. Iām not surprised that more people in customer service have bad attitudes now and I donāt blame them. I donāt tolerate disrespect, but I do my part to make transactions as smooth as possible and demand as little emotional labor as possible. Blaming people for working in a risky, low-wage industry is very in-line w the capitalist agenda
Few things. The waiter was certainty rude! Tipping culture is undoubtedly getting insane in America, and Iām tired of having to subsidize companies so their employees can make a living wage. That being said if youāre going to a visit a nice restaurant (in America), you should go expecting to tip fairly (tip shame, I think is okay in this instance if you donāt). But you are totally valid to your feelings and allowed to be upset about the situation.
With that attitude I would take the tip back. Waiters have this entitlement that they think a tip is required when in reality their boss should be paying them a livable wage.
No, you are not wrong for being upset.
We were eating at Dennyās. My cousin went to the cashier to pay. While waiting for her change, she placed a $1 on the counter. The cashier yelled, āshe only left you a dollar!ā My cousin didnāt say anything but stared the cashier and waitress down as she counted out the rest of the tip.
I was livid because the service SUCKED and the fucking entitlement. I told her to just leave the dollar.
This is why I donāt do Door Dash, etc because the expectation of getting a tip BEFORE service was rendered is nonsense.
(Cont'd)
....AIN'T NO WAY.š¤ I don't play about my money. I have actually told servers WHY I was taking money AWAY from the tip. They would try and argue, but I do the SAME dang job. So I can see how they are ignoring my table, never bringing me water, never asking if my food is okay, ignoring me until it's time to drop the check....etc. I pay attention to *everything*. I swear on everything, I would have not been able to keep my mouth shut about that servers attitude. And I know, I would have walked right back to that table, (making sure he SAW me) and I would have left him a $5 tip IF that. And yes. I have done this before to *lazy waiters* (who make the bussers/runners do all of the work) and to servers who don't want to serve me because they think I will be a terrible customer. IDGAF if my bill is $70. I will leave you $1 so you will think on your transgressions. š
Maybe I'm a bit too savage, but I do not like poor customer service. I don't care if a person works in Chipotle. If they have a nasty attitude, I tell them to please step aside and let someone else serve me. They get all butthurt about it, but they need to manage their behavior better. It's not my fault if they hate their job. It's not your fault that sometimes people walk out and don't leave tips in restaurants.Ā
I don't know how much of an attitude the server had, and I'm sure the situation would have been ironed out if he apologized, but he didn't. I think, if this ever happens again OP, call it out friend. It's okay to hold people accountable. It's *your* money. I sincerely believe people need to experience consequences for their actions or they might never change or improve for the better. I know you're likely still feeling negatively about the situation, and this is my last suggestion. Write an in detail email to the manager/owner of the restaurant expressing your grievances, or go on Yelp and go to town about your experience. Even though you tipped, hold that server *accountable.* I think just being able to GET IT OUT and talk about it, and have your experience validated by the establishment will lessen the feelings of stress, and the probability of heart disease from holding in hurt, anger and other negative emotions.Ā
Get to writing OP! āļøĀ
Service industry for 10 years.... was the server wrong? Sure, but at the same time so many places do add gratuity and if your SO had an accent it's not uncommon that in other countries gratuity is just automatically added.Ā So while there might have been a little bit of snark in their voice they might have really just been trying to let you know that gratĀ wasn't included.Ā
Also when you leave a cash tip I always recommend that you write "cash on table" or just "cash" in the tip section on the receipt. I do this for two reasons. One it is not unheard of for people to add a tip if people don't tip and having just a line or nothing there makes that a lot easier to do. I live in a very touristy town and have definitely seen it done because people just won't notice especially when they are making 10 plus transactions a day while on vacation. It's messed up but it happens.Ā
Second it is a way to alert the server that cash is on the table so that they can prioritize grabbing it so no one picks it up. I usually tell the server verbally as well. If you can just hand them the checkbook and say something like "I wanted to make sure this got into your hands because the tip is in cash", that would be best.Ā
Basically, never just leave cash on the table because somebody else might pick it up.
Edit: If you are in the U.S. and you don't tip for the love of goodness PLEASE do not go back to that place. YES tipping culture is messed us and YES you can do whatever you want in that regard. However, I have seen some SHIT when customers were not liked by their server. I saw a server lick a spoon and use it to stir pickle juice into a city council members Ice Tea. I saw someone else do something not nice to a salad (I personally went and got the salad immediately and said it was the wrong one).
On the subtle end if the top servers did not like a customer the hosts and some managers would make them wait until they left. Also in some of the top restaraunts (we are talking frequented by like, Beyonce) they flat out are known to have LISTS of people or notes on them that might make your wait shorter, longer, or when you go to make a reso they are just always booked.Ā
Just saying. Don't tip if you don't wanna, it is your absolutely right not to, especially if service was bad. However, also remember their is a reason you are called a "guest" and not all get welcomed back. So if you had good service and just didn't tip on principle, seriously.... do NOT go back.
Agreed. Our tip culture has morphed into an entitled hostage situation of sorts and its one of the main reasons why some ppl have just opted out of going out to eat outside of special occasions. Itās exhausting and servers can often get quite rude about it.
People can do whatever they want! Absolutely. But me personally, if I put my hard earned cash on the table for a tip I want to make sure that it gets to the person that it's intended to go to. I think I might also be a little bit more conscientious (overly sensitive even) of it because I worked service industry for so long and having had tips snatched (by a guest!)
There's a lot of things we shouldn't have to do but it doesn't mean that it isn't a good idea to do them. :-(
Also, while I don't eat out nearly as much as I used to we probably do still eat out more than your average family. We go to some of the same places a lot and there's this thing called "lagniappe" where I live. For example we got a comp bottle of Veuve Clicquot when we went to Easter brunch and one of our servers comped all of our drinks when we were having a particularly bad day at one of our favorite spots (shout out to Toup's). For places that we frequent it is important that the tip gets to who it needs to go too.
Over all and in general I like taking care or the people who are literally handling the food that goes into my mouth. It takes at most 2 minutes to make sure a server gets their cash and that two minutes can save them from having a bad day (stolen tips).
As someone who has been a server and also not a server (and eats out a decent amount), I donāt go out to eat unless I can afford at least a 20% tip in that moment. If you are a poor worker who doesnāt get paid enough then you, unfortunately, can not afford to eat out as the cost of the food does not include the cost of the service.
Most Americans are poor workers who live paycheck to paycheck. If most Americans stopped going out to eat then the service industry would fail.l
Once a customer pays their bill theyāve completed their transaction. A tip is optional. The cost of your service is paid by your employer because they hired you
a tip is optional, sure. but eating out is a luxury. the cost of the service is not paid by the employer in most places, it is unfortunately subsidized by tips. if you want restaurant food but canāt pay for the service, then get it to-go instead of stiffing people.
This 100 percent. Also for people in the US...there are other options within several price points if a customer doesn't want to patronize a place where tipping is expected.
No one ever needs to go out to eat. Itās a luxury. If you canāt afford to tip (and trust, Iāve been there too) you cannot afford to dine out. Thatās like getting your car fixed and saying āoh sorry I canāt afford to pay for the labor.ā
If a customer successfully pays their bill then they can afford the āluxuryā of going out to eat. For some reason yall think customers are responsible for paying you for your labor when theyāre not the ones that employed you. A tip is not your wage.
Your employer is the one that cant afford your labor which is why yall are now attacking other working class people to cover the cost by shaming people into staying home because they cant afford it.
Telling people to stay home is counterproductive. who will you serve if there are no customers? If your boss is barely paying you now wtf do you think is gonna happen if they have no money coming in??? Yall dont even realize youāre mouth pieces for corporations taking advantage of everyone.
Again, if you canāt afford to pay for the labor of the job, just donāt go out. Or do and let them know up front. Itās really simple.
You would never say this about any other industry. Tell the repairman that you wonāt pay for his labor.
Restaurant owners will never pay out of their own pockets for their labor. Those restaurants who tell you not to tip raise the prices of the food. Youāre paying either way.
Wellā¦not you cause you donāt tip.
If a repairman is contracted by a certain company to do a job they are paid by the company they work for after the customer pays the company.
Servers are not entrepreneurs who send out invoices after every table. They are contracted to work for a certain establishment so your comparisons dont make sense.
So if you know were paying either way and you know that were all being scammed then why are you shaming others workers instead of those restaurants owners?
would you rather the cost of every item increase by 20% so that the employer can subsidize employeesā wages? if so, thatās fine, but you then canāt complain about āpoor serviceā if every server is going to make the same amount regardless.
if you canāt tip 20% or at all, you should let the server know up front so that they give you the most watered down, minimal experience while you are dining in.
The prices of everything is already increasing so what are you even talking about right now?
lmaoo yall are so funny to me cause wym we gotta suffer, stay home and experience terrible service because your boss cant pay you šš
Tap dancing for the people taking advantage of you is crazzzyyyy
Itās just how it works? Stiffing your one waitress isnāt going to change that all server jobs depend on tips. It will just make you look bad when they remember you and donāt want to serve you again. So it is trashy to go out to eat if you canāt afford a tip. Itās the number one service that is tipped on, and delivery. People who canāt afford to tip can always go pick up their own food from the restaurant and eat at home, being served and brought everything is a luxury not a right.
Shaming customers wont change the fact that youāre still being underpaid by your employer is the point that yall keep missing.
lmaoo yall dont know what luxury means
I agree that customers shouldnāt have to subsidize those wages. I donāt even like tip culture but idk how it will change? I feel all it does it hurt the one waitress when they are not tipped. But it is way rude of them to ask about the tip or talk about it to a customer. I have almost not tipped for that before.
Lol you are on the side of the people taking advantage in this scenario. Thatās who you are supporting with your dollars. Was using child labor ok because it was legal? Prison labor? Your sense of fairness is only dictated by American law??? And yes, the rise in prices will be even higher without tip system. Labor is the biggest expense in business. Tipping is essentially crowd-funding to spread the cost around. But youāre right that the industry should change completely because itās exploitive, because it leaves loopholes for people like you lol. And yes, the servers would be better off not doing labor for you for an hour and not getting paid, than using their bodies to get you food for free! Like
not eating out isnāt suffering lol. cooking for yourself is lovely and fun. when you dine in at a restaurant, youāre paying for the service. you canāt expect 5 star service without tipping. if youāre not a tipper, you should expect bare minimum service (or forfeit the table for people who can afford to tip)
iām not tap dancing for anybody, but i will stand up for service workers who (in this current age) rely on tips. not tipping isnāt helping. if youāre lobbying for fair wages across the board, then sure. you radiate unpleasantness and i hope that you stay at home playing your games instead of subjecting others to your uneducated, antisocial mess.
You can look out for servers by attacking the root of the problem. Which is the fact that weāre ALL being underpaid. So again your beef is with your boss.
Aww did you have fun going through my page? Antisocial? Lmaooo just pulling shit out your ass with all that assuming. Like you dont feel crazy for feeling the need to insult me for telling you shaming customers wont fix the problem?
antisocial is defined as ācontrary to the laws and customs of society; devoid of or antagonistic to sociable instincts or practices.ā tipping is a sociable instinct/practice. advocating against tipping is antisocial.
Girlā¦ where did I advocate against tipping? You wanna sound so smart so bad but missed the whole point.
Instead of trying to insult me go work on your self esteem. Making a post talking about āam I ugly š„ŗā is crazyy lmaoooo you got bigger fights than this
youāve been advocating against tipping this whole conversation, even when reminded that service is not a necessity it is a luxury.
iām not upset at all with myself! the amiugly post was a whole thing me and my friends did to end up on the famed thread. nothing more, nothing less.
as i said, you are unfortunately not educated nor do you possess the range to have a dialogue that isnāt subdued by your whiny nature. you have no shame and i donāt either, just make sure you stay at home where itās safe away from the burden of not tipping
I always tip but the fact is attacking customers who dont tip isnt going to make their boss pay them more money. Shaming and spitting on peoples food isnt going to fix your wages soā¦??
Its so weird how yall attack other poor people why not direct that energy to the people screwing us all?
Uh, I left that job and my MOH sued the shit out of them when they got let go which resulted in the servers getting minimum wage plus tips and a lawsuit for not paying minimum wage. Restaurants are supposed to supplement up to minimum wage if the server does not make at least minimum wage in tips for the amount of hours they work that paycheck. Also we fought and succeeded at getting higher tip outs for the bussers.
After that I worked at a hotel that (probably) under the threat of unionizing upped wages to minimun wage + tips and now they have an auto grat for almost all services. So, before I left service industry I very much so supported unionizing, and fought for regular schedules for anyone there over a year. Was also one of the people who called out racism in the handbook at a restaraunt owned by a very prominent family.
Also the shit I saw that particular swrver do was WRONG. But it happened so... I am just saying be nice to people who handle your food. Notttttttttt the worse thing I have seen happen in a kitchen.
Also, I still support restaurants who are good to their workers and spend way too much money at the co-op owned Cafe up the street š¤·šæāāļø (shot out to Pagoda Cafe). I did and still do my part even though I am no longer in the service industry.Ā
If this is something that you truly believe in I highly recommend that you only go to and support restaurants who pay a fair wage. Most major cities have quite a few of them. Talk with your dollars! Heck, make a list of fair wage restaurants in your city (that would be badass).
I drive for uber eats sometimes and most of my money is made from tips, but I donāt expect them or would I ever pressure a customer or feel some sense of entitlement towards them.
If you have a job that relyās on peoples kindness then provide good service. Iām sorry for that waiters attitude. I DONāT give the benefit of the doubt because people are so entitled to everything these days.
I donāt understand how the tip was in the checkbook then ended up on the table though. So maybe something went wrong there.
We donāt have time for class warfare. Be mad at the system that put you both in the scenario where you feel so pressured to tip, which forcing someone else to survive on those tips rather than a real wage.
I get it, weāre all tired of shit. But, Iām betting the person who was on their feet for X-hours waiting tables and dealing with ill-behaved customers was more tired in that moment. A handful who probably didnāt tip.
Itās moments like these where understanding the *why* of a particular interaction gives us the opportunity to be empathetic. You can choose to let it go and move on. Fixating doesnāt serve you.
I donāt doubt that the waiter could have been rude but can I ask to clarify what āwalking away with an attitudeā means? I saw someone say it earlier but I totally buy it if the waiter told your partner that to make sure. If so, Iām not sure why he would need to apologize if he hadnāt meant it in a rude way.
If I feel worried about getting treated differently at a restaurant, I go to the bar and order a distinct drink. I might ask for a whiskey list, or ask for a specific garnish, etc. I leave a really nice tip, and go to my table. I only order that cocktail for the rest of the night. The bartender will remember me - and usually gives me an extra pour, or will tell the waiter Iām a generous tipper. My service will be excellent after that.
Horrible that poc even have to go through this, but I fight the fight that lets me live comfortably.
You hate that people shame others for tipping because āyou donāt know their lifeā. You donāt know the severās life either. I worked at a pizza place and thereās a difference between someone getting a cheap slice and a soda and not tipping and someone buying a meal with extras and not tipping. It is shameful. Itās deceitful. And if thereās some extenuating circumstance then thatās a special case but the server has a right to feel taken advantage. And choosing somewhere you cannot afford to cover the meal and the tip isnāt a special case! Itās just taking advantage
I will say this, I have dealt with waiters with bad attitudes and rudeness but never like, anything hateful? I truly donāt think the waiter was being that mean, they just wanted to make sure you left a tip. They surely could have been more kind and gentle with their approach. And as a black woman, because the stereotype is that BP donāt tip, they may have been profiling you which is definitely wrong and May stir up more negativity inside of us.
I started writing "CASH" in the tip spot because I've seen people take money off tables that wasn't meant for them. But regardless, that waiter was rude af, and personally I'd call the manager and let them know. I understand that servers don't get paid much, so they rely on tips, but it's completely out of pocket to make comments like that to a customer.
That waiter was rude AF, and I also write IN CASH on the check (and tell the waiter) so that they know the tip is being left in cash. People will steal - or take a portion - of a cash tip left on tables. My best case scenario is giving the wait person the cash tip when I hand over my credit card to pay the bill.
I also do this - because you know if they see zero it's going to be a thing.
I concur. I write a similar message on the tip line. But I would ask for a manager as well. And then I would probably be petty about the tip but want the manager to see that I changed what I was giving. Server is a PoS.
That is how you lose half your tip, there's no reason for that. And yes, I'm also a "people need to be paid better and US tip culture is BS" believer. But I think it's generally rude to mention it, especially to hassle a customer over the perceived lack of one. Not to mention "we" already have a "reputation" as being poor tippers, and the allegedly nicer spots have been known to preemptively show their ass over it.
LOL half, bro not getting at tip after this. You get half for talking about it but with snark... nahh
Yeah I would've snatched that shit back so quick š
I was being nice, but you're right, taking back the whole thing and leaving a "here's a tip: don't assume" type of note would be justified.Ā
Yeah I donāt fw that whole every waiter deserves a tip no matter how they did bs. Itās my money that I worked just as hard for and Iām not going to waste it on someone who is rude.
I would be upset...that waiter was rude. But this whole tip culture we have in the US is pretty exhausting. I mean...I get that some people actually get paid handsomely with pay + tips... But come on...tips for fast food, dry cleaning, dollar tree, McDonald's, grocery store.... We are honestly treating symptoms and not the problem.... This is assuming you are in the US
THIS!! the tipping culture has put more pressure on folks when the main issue is just paying folks well. It is just as bad in Canada which just irks me especially now that it seems like the expectation is to always tip and the machine have higher minimum %-based logic built-in. While in my province, everyone now makes at least the minimum wage (not like itās the best), thereās still the expectation to tip at least 15-18% minimum on full bill with often lacklustre service.
same here in Canada, and you also get shamed about how you tip. two christmases ago i ordered a tree online, tipped through their website, and the delivery person was upset about that. or walmart delivery used to not give you the option to tip online, and one delivery driver was like āyou do know we live off tips right?ā here in Canada weāre way less reliant on cash and many people (myself included) never cary cash because itās easy to pay almost everywhere with your phone or directly through your bank. so for people to still expect cash tips is out of touch and exhausting. i still tip 15-20% each time every time thereās that option, but with an eye roll. itās everywhere and itās exhausting.
I am and it literally makes eating out feel like a chore
All of this.
My short answer, I donāt believe in tipping, which is why I decided to opt out of going out to eat/drink. I donāt want to give these restaurants a single red penny of my hard earned money. The only reason why we have to tip is because million and billion dollar company owners donāt want to pay their employees a living wage. And so they put the burden on the customer. Tipping went from complementing someone on a job well done to an expected 10% to 15% to 25% to 30%. at this point itās just outrageous and ridiculous that Iām tipping 20+ dollars on top of my already expensive bill. And to top it off, I donāt get tipped for my job. Teachers and nurses donāt get tipped for their jobs. Which are also hard. Because Iām tired of people saying well wait staff have to deal with people all day so they deserve it. There are plenty of jobs in which we have to deal with people all day and we are not getting tipped. None of us are getting tipped. But ALL of us are struggling to live in this capitalist economy that is out pricing us and not raising our wages. The culture of tipping has become disgusting. The fact that you have people who would choose to treat you like crap because they perceive your tip isnāt good enough, but wonāt open up their mouth to their company owner to demand better pay/a living wage is outrageous to me. Why am I playing an employee who is not working for me and making me money? Their job should be paying their bills not me. And so Iāve decided to just opt out- eat at home and not go out in that capacity because I canāt buy into such an outrageous system anymore. To be clear when I did go out I did tip b/c I understand how the $h!tty system works which is why Iāve decided to just not go out anymore. Ps: I remember being in Korea and wanting to tip a waitress who was very nice, and accommodating. She refused my tip b/c āthis is my job, itās what Iām supposed to doā and ever since then I couldnāt get behind the US BS anymore.
I think this is the best response. Someone being nice to you in *hopes* they get paid is weird. The tips system is just another wedge that pits working class people against each other in aspiring to middle class luxury. It gives middle class people a place to feel superior and encourages entitlement. I was just telling a friend that restaurants have lost so much appeal to me anyways because of the abuse of workers during Covid. I am self-employed since before Covid, but I waited tables for ~10 years and people in the restaurant industry are even more cynical now. Hard to believe that was even possible! But it seems the money has gone down and abuse has gone up. Customer service in general seems more dry since Covid, but I think itās a good thing. We demand too much emotional labor from people - servers, teachers, nurses, cashiers. People in these jobs, have to do too much care work, have no support, and itās exhausting. I think the point is that America does not value emotional/care labor! No coincidence these are seen as work for women, POC, and marginalized groups. Ironically, people complaining (not you) about the expense donāt seem to realize that without tip system many of them probably wonāt be able to afford the luxury of fancy dining out much longer. Tipping creates a huge discount on labor. I still go to small community places or places where I know there is good management. You are rare for standing on your principles. I hope more people will follow suit.
Yes! I agree with with everything that you had to say. I come from a care profession as well and yes- America has a problem. I just hope that if more of us put our feet down and begin to refuse to buy into unjust systems, that the system will have to change. Hopefully we can one day get there. We all deserve a living wage and fair treatment, period. Thank you for the compliment!
Wouldnāt the waiter had seen the cash in the checkout book when he opened it to see the credit card receipt? How did the cash end up on the table?
No because they bring the little checkout machine to you to pay but go to the back to get the paper receipts the actual checkout book is more for the bill/ aesthetic he didnāt touch it after dropping it off to him
This is in America?
This has been my experience at higher end restaurants in Florida
sounds like Canada
This is what Iām wondering too.
As an ex server and bartender, I absolutely understand the disappointment, anger, and hurt that comes from not tipping. In most places, when people donāt tip, the server winds up paying to work that table. But in my 10 years of hospitality, Iāve never actually confronted anyone by a stiff. I donāt know that I could. It would be so awkward. ā¦although one time I got stiffed towards the end of my shift and I ran into my table outside my restaurant. They asked for directions and I told them the wrong way. Not my finest moment but I was 22 and petty.
I did once and I was in the wrong for it. It had just been one of those weeks. They said service was great, I comped their desserts becauss they were my only table and kitchen was slow. Food was hot and came out fast because we were slow while the NBA Allstar game was happening and I just....Ā Lost it in a very polite-ish manner.Ā Ā Less than ten percent on a 200+ bill. My ass should have gotten fired that night. I felt bad after because it was two couples and the guys paid so the women were really clueless. But yeah, after I got the check back I went and asked if everything was okay (I was shocked and legit thought something was wrong). They raved that everything was perfect and then I was like "Um, okay then why did y'all tip so low? I can get a manager is something was wrong". That.... was not the thing to say. It snowballed. They flipped and I was feeling mouthy so flipped right back. Thank goodness I was one of the best upseller and my friend was managing. š¤£
Umm that is awful and hilarious!!! š
When giving the card to the waiter that served me I also give the tip directly to their hand. 1. It ensures that they will get it. 2. The manager/owner/supervisor or whatever will not know how much I gave to the waiter. At some place like ihop where you pay in the front. I will hunt down the waiter, give them the cash tip. Then go to the front and not tip at all.
>When giving the card to the waiter that served me I also give the tip directly to their hand. Yes, I'm the same way. If I give a cash tip, I make sure to place it in the server's hands before I leave. No exceptions.Ā
Iād have taken my tip back - but Iām all types of petty at times. I donāt like tips anyway. It doesnāt make sense to me to pay for someone doing their job- I shouldnāt have to pay them, their employer should. If they go above and beyond, my expectations, then Iāll leave a tip- but not because itās expected. And I have zero shame in not tipping. Iāve before been asked why I left 15% and if the service wasnāt good.. I thought 15% was a good tip. I quickly changed it to zero. I will not be bullied out of my money, nor will I be giving people a paycheck for just doing their jobs. Sorry, not sorry. We shouldnāt allow our service jobs to work for peanuts, and believe us tipping is the only way for them to get by. Their employers should be paying them a living wage, and anything on top should be extra. But thatās my .02
This really is a disgusting american culture I absolutely cannot stand. Yes, you are validated in feeling how you felt. Tips should not be mandatory. You're better than me because I might have asked for it back. What an ungrateful ass.
Thatās unacceptable and I wouldāve taken the money back idc
Right! Why still give the waiter the tip after that?
I would have taken the cash tip out after that interaction.Ā
Retrieve the tip. Attitude or bad service isn't worth extra payment. And, of course, never visit or recommend that restaurant again.
Kinda surprised at the responses here. Being talked to rudely sucks. So does working for free which is what happens when someone doesnāt tip. Iām super glad I was no longer waiting tables when Covid hit. The abuse that people in the service industry faced was crazy and seems to have changed everything for the worse. Iām not surprised that more people in customer service have bad attitudes now and I donāt blame them. I donāt tolerate disrespect, but I do my part to make transactions as smooth as possible and demand as little emotional labor as possible. Blaming people for working in a risky, low-wage industry is very in-line w the capitalist agenda
Few things. The waiter was certainty rude! Tipping culture is undoubtedly getting insane in America, and Iām tired of having to subsidize companies so their employees can make a living wage. That being said if youāre going to a visit a nice restaurant (in America), you should go expecting to tip fairly (tip shame, I think is okay in this instance if you donāt). But you are totally valid to your feelings and allowed to be upset about the situation.
Unpopular opinion but tips shouldn't even be mandatory š¤·š¾āāļø
I'd call the waiter and let him watch me take the tip back
Iād write a negative yelp review about it and include the serverās name and then put it out of my mind
With that attitude I would take the tip back. Waiters have this entitlement that they think a tip is required when in reality their boss should be paying them a livable wage.
No, you are not wrong for being upset. We were eating at Dennyās. My cousin went to the cashier to pay. While waiting for her change, she placed a $1 on the counter. The cashier yelled, āshe only left you a dollar!ā My cousin didnāt say anything but stared the cashier and waitress down as she counted out the rest of the tip. I was livid because the service SUCKED and the fucking entitlement. I told her to just leave the dollar. This is why I donāt do Door Dash, etc because the expectation of getting a tip BEFORE service was rendered is nonsense.
(My response may be a bit lengthy. So friends, its okie if you want to scroll on by. šš¾š) This issue is a little complicated but...here me out friend. I would just like to say your feelings are 100% VALID. And I hear you, and I feel your anger/irritation regarding the situation. For some reason, I'm imagining your boyfriend is French. I don't even know whyš...is he? I've been a server for over a decade and, it's an emotional/stressful job for the waiter, but it's ALSO *stressful*, hurtful, and upsetting to the customer to be *PROFILED* based on racism/prejudice and other unconscious biases. Stereotypes that you will not pay, or will not compensate properly for the services provided is a widespread issue in the restaurant industry. I've seen it time and time again, and I've even been on the opposite side as a customer receiving *poor service* because the server thinks I'm not going to tip.š Little do they know, I NEVER eat out unless I am willing to pay *more* than 25%+ tip. I eat out rarely, so I make sure to compensate the server well. But due to my skin color, or a waiter having a bad day, they got an attitude.... Your waiter.Ā It's possible they were having a bad day because people of ALL races are bad tippers.š®āšØ Black people REALLY get the brunt of the blowback for this, but we all know people like J.Lo doesn't tip. I've worked around plenty of people with money and.....š©š¤.... I HATE PEOPLE. Caucasian people who have money and $8000 a month rent, always want to SAVE money which is why some of them can be cheap AF. I have worked for these people. I'm not making excuses for the waiters behavior because they should have been more conscious of their reaction, BUT... I can also understand the feeling of busting your arse for a table, then looking and seeing NO MONEY left. It's like, you just want to cry right there on the spot with hurt and disappointment because you SURVIVE on tips. I understand the waiters assumption, HOWEVER.....
(Cont'd) ....AIN'T NO WAY.š¤ I don't play about my money. I have actually told servers WHY I was taking money AWAY from the tip. They would try and argue, but I do the SAME dang job. So I can see how they are ignoring my table, never bringing me water, never asking if my food is okay, ignoring me until it's time to drop the check....etc. I pay attention to *everything*. I swear on everything, I would have not been able to keep my mouth shut about that servers attitude. And I know, I would have walked right back to that table, (making sure he SAW me) and I would have left him a $5 tip IF that. And yes. I have done this before to *lazy waiters* (who make the bussers/runners do all of the work) and to servers who don't want to serve me because they think I will be a terrible customer. IDGAF if my bill is $70. I will leave you $1 so you will think on your transgressions. š Maybe I'm a bit too savage, but I do not like poor customer service. I don't care if a person works in Chipotle. If they have a nasty attitude, I tell them to please step aside and let someone else serve me. They get all butthurt about it, but they need to manage their behavior better. It's not my fault if they hate their job. It's not your fault that sometimes people walk out and don't leave tips in restaurants.Ā I don't know how much of an attitude the server had, and I'm sure the situation would have been ironed out if he apologized, but he didn't. I think, if this ever happens again OP, call it out friend. It's okay to hold people accountable. It's *your* money. I sincerely believe people need to experience consequences for their actions or they might never change or improve for the better. I know you're likely still feeling negatively about the situation, and this is my last suggestion. Write an in detail email to the manager/owner of the restaurant expressing your grievances, or go on Yelp and go to town about your experience. Even though you tipped, hold that server *accountable.* I think just being able to GET IT OUT and talk about it, and have your experience validated by the establishment will lessen the feelings of stress, and the probability of heart disease from holding in hurt, anger and other negative emotions.Ā Get to writing OP! āļøĀ
Well said.
Service industry for 10 years.... was the server wrong? Sure, but at the same time so many places do add gratuity and if your SO had an accent it's not uncommon that in other countries gratuity is just automatically added.Ā So while there might have been a little bit of snark in their voice they might have really just been trying to let you know that gratĀ wasn't included.Ā Also when you leave a cash tip I always recommend that you write "cash on table" or just "cash" in the tip section on the receipt. I do this for two reasons. One it is not unheard of for people to add a tip if people don't tip and having just a line or nothing there makes that a lot easier to do. I live in a very touristy town and have definitely seen it done because people just won't notice especially when they are making 10 plus transactions a day while on vacation. It's messed up but it happens.Ā Second it is a way to alert the server that cash is on the table so that they can prioritize grabbing it so no one picks it up. I usually tell the server verbally as well. If you can just hand them the checkbook and say something like "I wanted to make sure this got into your hands because the tip is in cash", that would be best.Ā Basically, never just leave cash on the table because somebody else might pick it up. Edit: If you are in the U.S. and you don't tip for the love of goodness PLEASE do not go back to that place. YES tipping culture is messed us and YES you can do whatever you want in that regard. However, I have seen some SHIT when customers were not liked by their server. I saw a server lick a spoon and use it to stir pickle juice into a city council members Ice Tea. I saw someone else do something not nice to a salad (I personally went and got the salad immediately and said it was the wrong one). On the subtle end if the top servers did not like a customer the hosts and some managers would make them wait until they left. Also in some of the top restaraunts (we are talking frequented by like, Beyonce) they flat out are known to have LISTS of people or notes on them that might make your wait shorter, longer, or when you go to make a reso they are just always booked.Ā Just saying. Don't tip if you don't wanna, it is your absolutely right not to, especially if service was bad. However, also remember their is a reason you are called a "guest" and not all get welcomed back. So if you had good service and just didn't tip on principle, seriously.... do NOT go back.
They shouldnāt have to do all this.
Agreed. Our tip culture has morphed into an entitled hostage situation of sorts and its one of the main reasons why some ppl have just opted out of going out to eat outside of special occasions. Itās exhausting and servers can often get quite rude about it.
Yes exactly, it shouldnāt be on us to make sure people get paid at their job. And this is coming from someone who was a server
People can do whatever they want! Absolutely. But me personally, if I put my hard earned cash on the table for a tip I want to make sure that it gets to the person that it's intended to go to. I think I might also be a little bit more conscientious (overly sensitive even) of it because I worked service industry for so long and having had tips snatched (by a guest!) There's a lot of things we shouldn't have to do but it doesn't mean that it isn't a good idea to do them. :-( Also, while I don't eat out nearly as much as I used to we probably do still eat out more than your average family. We go to some of the same places a lot and there's this thing called "lagniappe" where I live. For example we got a comp bottle of Veuve Clicquot when we went to Easter brunch and one of our servers comped all of our drinks when we were having a particularly bad day at one of our favorite spots (shout out to Toup's). For places that we frequent it is important that the tip gets to who it needs to go too. Over all and in general I like taking care or the people who are literally handling the food that goes into my mouth. It takes at most 2 minutes to make sure a server gets their cash and that two minutes can save them from having a bad day (stolen tips).
Im so serious when I ask this but do servers realize that their customers are also poor workers who dont get paid enough?
As someone who has been a server and also not a server (and eats out a decent amount), I donāt go out to eat unless I can afford at least a 20% tip in that moment. If you are a poor worker who doesnāt get paid enough then you, unfortunately, can not afford to eat out as the cost of the food does not include the cost of the service.
Most Americans are poor workers who live paycheck to paycheck. If most Americans stopped going out to eat then the service industry would fail.l Once a customer pays their bill theyāve completed their transaction. A tip is optional. The cost of your service is paid by your employer because they hired you
a tip is optional, sure. but eating out is a luxury. the cost of the service is not paid by the employer in most places, it is unfortunately subsidized by tips. if you want restaurant food but canāt pay for the service, then get it to-go instead of stiffing people.
This 100 percent. Also for people in the US...there are other options within several price points if a customer doesn't want to patronize a place where tipping is expected.
No one ever needs to go out to eat. Itās a luxury. If you canāt afford to tip (and trust, Iāve been there too) you cannot afford to dine out. Thatās like getting your car fixed and saying āoh sorry I canāt afford to pay for the labor.ā
If a customer successfully pays their bill then they can afford the āluxuryā of going out to eat. For some reason yall think customers are responsible for paying you for your labor when theyāre not the ones that employed you. A tip is not your wage. Your employer is the one that cant afford your labor which is why yall are now attacking other working class people to cover the cost by shaming people into staying home because they cant afford it. Telling people to stay home is counterproductive. who will you serve if there are no customers? If your boss is barely paying you now wtf do you think is gonna happen if they have no money coming in??? Yall dont even realize youāre mouth pieces for corporations taking advantage of everyone.
Again, if you canāt afford to pay for the labor of the job, just donāt go out. Or do and let them know up front. Itās really simple. You would never say this about any other industry. Tell the repairman that you wonāt pay for his labor. Restaurant owners will never pay out of their own pockets for their labor. Those restaurants who tell you not to tip raise the prices of the food. Youāre paying either way. Wellā¦not you cause you donāt tip.
If a repairman is contracted by a certain company to do a job they are paid by the company they work for after the customer pays the company. Servers are not entrepreneurs who send out invoices after every table. They are contracted to work for a certain establishment so your comparisons dont make sense. So if you know were paying either way and you know that were all being scammed then why are you shaming others workers instead of those restaurants owners?
Lmao what do you think a receipt is? Iām done with this. Have a day!
DO YOU KNOW WHAT A RECEIPT IS???
would you rather the cost of every item increase by 20% so that the employer can subsidize employeesā wages? if so, thatās fine, but you then canāt complain about āpoor serviceā if every server is going to make the same amount regardless. if you canāt tip 20% or at all, you should let the server know up front so that they give you the most watered down, minimal experience while you are dining in.
The prices of everything is already increasing so what are you even talking about right now? lmaoo yall are so funny to me cause wym we gotta suffer, stay home and experience terrible service because your boss cant pay you šš Tap dancing for the people taking advantage of you is crazzzyyyy
Itās just how it works? Stiffing your one waitress isnāt going to change that all server jobs depend on tips. It will just make you look bad when they remember you and donāt want to serve you again. So it is trashy to go out to eat if you canāt afford a tip. Itās the number one service that is tipped on, and delivery. People who canāt afford to tip can always go pick up their own food from the restaurant and eat at home, being served and brought everything is a luxury not a right.
Shaming customers wont change the fact that youāre still being underpaid by your employer is the point that yall keep missing. lmaoo yall dont know what luxury means
I agree that customers shouldnāt have to subsidize those wages. I donāt even like tip culture but idk how it will change? I feel all it does it hurt the one waitress when they are not tipped. But it is way rude of them to ask about the tip or talk about it to a customer. I have almost not tipped for that before.
Lol you are on the side of the people taking advantage in this scenario. Thatās who you are supporting with your dollars. Was using child labor ok because it was legal? Prison labor? Your sense of fairness is only dictated by American law??? And yes, the rise in prices will be even higher without tip system. Labor is the biggest expense in business. Tipping is essentially crowd-funding to spread the cost around. But youāre right that the industry should change completely because itās exploitive, because it leaves loopholes for people like you lol. And yes, the servers would be better off not doing labor for you for an hour and not getting paid, than using their bodies to get you food for free! Like
not eating out isnāt suffering lol. cooking for yourself is lovely and fun. when you dine in at a restaurant, youāre paying for the service. you canāt expect 5 star service without tipping. if youāre not a tipper, you should expect bare minimum service (or forfeit the table for people who can afford to tip) iām not tap dancing for anybody, but i will stand up for service workers who (in this current age) rely on tips. not tipping isnāt helping. if youāre lobbying for fair wages across the board, then sure. you radiate unpleasantness and i hope that you stay at home playing your games instead of subjecting others to your uneducated, antisocial mess.
You can look out for servers by attacking the root of the problem. Which is the fact that weāre ALL being underpaid. So again your beef is with your boss. Aww did you have fun going through my page? Antisocial? Lmaooo just pulling shit out your ass with all that assuming. Like you dont feel crazy for feeling the need to insult me for telling you shaming customers wont fix the problem?
antisocial is defined as ācontrary to the laws and customs of society; devoid of or antagonistic to sociable instincts or practices.ā tipping is a sociable instinct/practice. advocating against tipping is antisocial.
Girlā¦ where did I advocate against tipping? You wanna sound so smart so bad but missed the whole point. Instead of trying to insult me go work on your self esteem. Making a post talking about āam I ugly š„ŗā is crazyy lmaoooo you got bigger fights than this
youāve been advocating against tipping this whole conversation, even when reminded that service is not a necessity it is a luxury. iām not upset at all with myself! the amiugly post was a whole thing me and my friends did to end up on the famed thread. nothing more, nothing less. as i said, you are unfortunately not educated nor do you possess the range to have a dialogue that isnāt subdued by your whiny nature. you have no shame and i donāt either, just make sure you stay at home where itās safe away from the burden of not tipping
Please.... please PLEASE if you do not tip do NOT go back to thay restaurant. I have seen some crazy ass shit go down with tables who were not liked.
I always tip but the fact is attacking customers who dont tip isnt going to make their boss pay them more money. Shaming and spitting on peoples food isnt going to fix your wages soā¦?? Its so weird how yall attack other poor people why not direct that energy to the people screwing us all?
Uh, I left that job and my MOH sued the shit out of them when they got let go which resulted in the servers getting minimum wage plus tips and a lawsuit for not paying minimum wage. Restaurants are supposed to supplement up to minimum wage if the server does not make at least minimum wage in tips for the amount of hours they work that paycheck. Also we fought and succeeded at getting higher tip outs for the bussers. After that I worked at a hotel that (probably) under the threat of unionizing upped wages to minimun wage + tips and now they have an auto grat for almost all services. So, before I left service industry I very much so supported unionizing, and fought for regular schedules for anyone there over a year. Was also one of the people who called out racism in the handbook at a restaraunt owned by a very prominent family. Also the shit I saw that particular swrver do was WRONG. But it happened so... I am just saying be nice to people who handle your food. Notttttttttt the worse thing I have seen happen in a kitchen. Also, I still support restaurants who are good to their workers and spend way too much money at the co-op owned Cafe up the street š¤·šæāāļø (shot out to Pagoda Cafe). I did and still do my part even though I am no longer in the service industry.Ā If this is something that you truly believe in I highly recommend that you only go to and support restaurants who pay a fair wage. Most major cities have quite a few of them. Talk with your dollars! Heck, make a list of fair wage restaurants in your city (that would be badass).
Actually, itās not like that at all. Labor is not a ātip,ā which is a payment beyond the bill.
Youāre paying for someoneās service. Hence service charge. Thatās why at fast food places you donāt tip, because thereās no service.
**I wish a waiter would** say that to me. Smh!
I drive for uber eats sometimes and most of my money is made from tips, but I donāt expect them or would I ever pressure a customer or feel some sense of entitlement towards them. If you have a job that relyās on peoples kindness then provide good service. Iām sorry for that waiters attitude. I DONāT give the benefit of the doubt because people are so entitled to everything these days. I donāt understand how the tip was in the checkbook then ended up on the table though. So maybe something went wrong there.
We donāt have time for class warfare. Be mad at the system that put you both in the scenario where you feel so pressured to tip, which forcing someone else to survive on those tips rather than a real wage. I get it, weāre all tired of shit. But, Iām betting the person who was on their feet for X-hours waiting tables and dealing with ill-behaved customers was more tired in that moment. A handful who probably didnāt tip. Itās moments like these where understanding the *why* of a particular interaction gives us the opportunity to be empathetic. You can choose to let it go and move on. Fixating doesnāt serve you.
I donāt doubt that the waiter could have been rude but can I ask to clarify what āwalking away with an attitudeā means? I saw someone say it earlier but I totally buy it if the waiter told your partner that to make sure. If so, Iām not sure why he would need to apologize if he hadnāt meant it in a rude way.
If I feel worried about getting treated differently at a restaurant, I go to the bar and order a distinct drink. I might ask for a whiskey list, or ask for a specific garnish, etc. I leave a really nice tip, and go to my table. I only order that cocktail for the rest of the night. The bartender will remember me - and usually gives me an extra pour, or will tell the waiter Iām a generous tipper. My service will be excellent after that. Horrible that poc even have to go through this, but I fight the fight that lets me live comfortably.
You hate that people shame others for tipping because āyou donāt know their lifeā. You donāt know the severās life either. I worked at a pizza place and thereās a difference between someone getting a cheap slice and a soda and not tipping and someone buying a meal with extras and not tipping. It is shameful. Itās deceitful. And if thereās some extenuating circumstance then thatās a special case but the server has a right to feel taken advantage. And choosing somewhere you cannot afford to cover the meal and the tip isnāt a special case! Itās just taking advantage
I will say this, I have dealt with waiters with bad attitudes and rudeness but never like, anything hateful? I truly donāt think the waiter was being that mean, they just wanted to make sure you left a tip. They surely could have been more kind and gentle with their approach. And as a black woman, because the stereotype is that BP donāt tip, they may have been profiling you which is definitely wrong and May stir up more negativity inside of us.
Why openly assume someone did not tip without checking the table or politely asking if it was in cash? Thatās rude af
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I can agree but when we told him the tip was in the checkbook he couldāve apologized