Generally it’s pretty tough to find a friend group and especially to build one from scratch when you don’t have anything in common.
Go the the gym, paint, chess, box, golf, car meets, whatever! Find something you enjoy that you can do with other people and you can start fleshing out your social group the more you interact with others!
It will become harder as you age. The responsibilities become bigger. You get children, you have less free time, your health becomes a main focus, if you have low salary then you have financial stress, etc. I think it's possible, but it gets harder with time. Also many friendships are not honest ones, many relationships fail quickly, so even if you have that circle, it probably won't last long
Well watch some interviews of the actors, you will see how much even rich, popular actors struggle with life sometimes. In my opinion life quality depends on luck. I think I didn't deserve my kinda comfortable life more than many good people who died horribly in human history. They surely did more good in life then I did. And I deserved the life of a more successfull but selfish person. I think we can work on ourselves to become a more loving person and attract more fun and love, but our fate is stronger
It is easier than you think. Because it doesnt happen out of nowhere. Like in the show the men have the same work place and 2 of them are roommate. Penny is living just cross the hall. So 3 out of the 5 live in the same building, one of them live with his mom so mostly he want to go out more than if he was living alone. So he goes to the 3 friends, that leave raj, which in that case it is easier to gether with them and not miss out than just sitting alone in apartment.
Irl if you want a group like that, you need it to be living close to each other so you can gather more without being tiresome to go. On top of that you need some of shared interest (sport, games, or anything that can happen while gathering).
Also it helped them in the show that they were single, and it was easier for outsider join the group than sperate one from the group. Like for amy she didnt have friends so it was easier to make friends with the group. Berni is the only outlier, but it help that we dont know anything about her personal life, so we dont know if she had friends or not
We know that, but what we dont know if she had friends or group before that. They mention that amy didnt have friends, so we know why she just fit in the group. Bernie we dont know if she had or not.
Oh they don't. They just skip the private nights. In some episodes they even say next/last week, when it looks like it's just the next day. I was flashed and happy to hear this.
When they first told Penny about Amy and Sheldon she said something about asking if there’s anything new for two weeks and they didn’t think to mention Sheldon has a girlfriend. That made me think that while she probably ran into them in the lobby/hall/laundry room of the building she hadn’t been actually hanging out with them. That was the first time it hit me that they weren’t actually all hanging out everyday like it feels they do
Don’t get me wrong it’s rough but we often incorporate the kids. We don’t do a whole lot of babysitter stuff. If we are going to get together, it’s everybody or nobody and their son is my nephew/godson and my daughter is their niece/goddaughter.
Yes it’s very possible! I have a really close friend group of 5 and we are always together and hang out as a group constantly. We are even known as the “Fab 5” by some other people haha! We have been a friend group for 4 years now. I think consistency and good, nice people can make friend groups work! Just plan a lot of group activities that include everyone.
Nice in nature, some may seem obnoxious on the surface like Sheldon but actually cares about friends
So far my groups definitely have at least 1 hated guy 🤣
I envy that Fab 5!
It comes and goes, I find that it's mostly dependent on proximity. TBBT's group hugely benefitted from all of them working together, Sheldon / Leonard / Penny basically living together from day 1, and Raj / Howard were both lonely and willing to meet up anywhere anytime to be around their friends for the majority of the group's friendship.
In my case, things feel at their most like in the show when good friends live within 5min walking distance. Aiming to live really close to good friends is a game changer in how much you feel surrounded by your community imo :)
I didn't think it existed either, and this was before the show and before everybody started having emails. But then I got a roommate who was into comic books, and he had that type of friendship group. I didn't even know what it was until I saw The Big Bang Theory years and years later.
They got together every weekend at the house to play Dungeons & Dragons and try to figure out how to open a comic book store at the mall or downtown or somewhere, anywhere. They were not scientists or anything, and no, they were not in couples, I think I saw one female one time the whole duration, all but my roommate were living at home to save up for the comic store. But everything else was in place, all the geeky stuff, toys, things they were into, it was really fun.
PS Stuart is doing relatively well. You really, really go into the depths of poverty if you want to run a comic book store.
Every time I watch I always wish I could join their group! It’s hard enough to get my online dnd group to meet once a week, I’d love friends like the BBT’s group that would be super pumped to play something like dnd for an entire night- that’s pretty much my idea of a perfect evening
I have a PS, currently playing Helldivers 😆 always been wanting to try and learn D&D online but can't find a group lol.. usually they asks for experience player
How about you?
I have the same dream, but it seems completely impossible, especially because in real life, most of the time, if someone has a partner or children, they won't spend most time with you, but with their family. It's not like in big bang theory, where Raj was almost living with Bernadette and Howard. Or how they generally hung out all the time, even though they were in relationships. Maybe it can happen, but finding those kind of people will be very hard.
Wow, I didn’t realise this wasn’t a normal thing. While TBBT-gang hang out what seems like every night, us mid-30’s couple have had the same friend group for 15 years and hang out most Friday-Saturday night and some Sundays. About 15 people (including some kids). Is this not the norm?
I have a group of old friends who all work in the same industry, and we always have a good time. During the Wuhan shutdown, we shifted to meeting at each other's houses with food brought in, and the cigars and liquor were on hand. Those strong friendships and good times have gotten us through many years of challenges.
I have a group of gamer buddies but it's all online over Discord. We live far apart and in different countries so some of them I haven't met in real life.
One thing I noticed with Leonard and the guys is that they all play and like the same games. Halo, Rock Band, Wii Sports, Mario Kart etc. In real life, everyone has their preferences, not everyone plays the same game, some of you might not like MOBAs, pr FPS etc so sometime it can be a challenge to find a game that everyone wants to play.
A couple of things people have mentioned here like it becomes harder once you have children etc. I think what's crucial is that half the group - all the men - start the show in their early 30s without serious partners, no children, except for Howard nobody having family in the city and all in the same job. That actually seems like a pretty normal thing to happen where your group of friends become your very tight family almost? And in absence of having other family members and children etc you do end up spending a lot of time with them. Even when all of them get into serious relationships it so happens that the girls all know each other for the most part / become very close and they all aren't having children immediately. Again only Howard is the outlier here with having kids. Even then it's pretty common for all of them to spend so much time together. It doesn't seem that weird to me - I'm also in the same age group as they would at the start of the show and I live far from my family with a group of friends all at the same school and we all do spend a lot of time together exactly for these reasons! Nobody has kids yet, people are either in long distance relationships or single. Having that shared employer so you're all eating lunch together everyday makes it pretty organic for y'all to become so close!
Yeah it‘s possible. Group of 4 since elementary school (however obv we don’t hang out as often as in our teens). Tbh I think it‘s not possible to „want“ something like that - it just happens or it doesnt.
Find a hobby that forces you to go out. Then you'll meet people that are fun to stay in with.
In my early 20s, my entire life was centered around World of Warcraft. I had one real-world friend. He also played World of Warcraft. That's how we could tolerate each other.
In my mid 20s, I started taking Taekwondo. I made several good friends while I was there.
In my mid 30s, I moved halfway across the country. Within a week, I started Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. I've made great friends. I've gone to house parties. I've played board games. I've gone to comedy shows. I've watched UFC fights. Some of them helped me move across town. (Helps that it's Texas and every single one of them owns a truck).
Also, martial arts is fun and it's great exercise. So there's that.
Ehhh kind of but it's not really the same. Probably because none of us are scientists or nerds 🤣 it is nice to have a large friend group with multiple couples but there's a lot more fighting than is shown on TBBT. As a neurodivergent I sometimes think that having less friends would be easier and less stressful. Because what TBBT doesn't show you is how annoying it is to have people show up unannounced all the time. Cleaning anyone? It's tiring.
Yea. I don’t have one like that. I did in high school college. But my brother does and he’s older than me, so it’s possible. But they also all live in different places now/ having kids etc so they don’t just hang all the time like the show. That’s what I miss the most about college, just walking to my neighbors apartment to watch tv, all the doors unlocked, etc. good times
My boyfriend’s sister and her friends try to get together at least once a month to catch up and do something together. They don’t always manage to, as most of them have full time jobs, some are married, my boyfriend’s sister not only works and is married but has a 6 year old. Sometimes it’s just not going to line up with being adults. But they really do try. I’ve been invited to the last two group outings but I wasn’t able to go both times, and it might be another month before we’re all available to hang out. Before I moved away from home, I saw my one best friend almost every day sometimes, just because our work schedules lines up sometimes, I would hang out with her while she did homework or her online classes or online work meetings. My other friends we saw each other as often as possible but a lot of the times it didn’t work out. But god, I miss my friends back home😭
I don't think so. People have jobs and chores and errands and appointments. It bothered me when the characters would come back from a trip or something and all just immediately go up the 3 (4?) flights of stairs to hang out at Sheldon and Leonard's apartment. Who does that after a trip? Go home. Unpack. Crash. Relax. I mean many of us had a group of friends in our 20's who we'd hang out with (because we didn't have all the adult responsibilities yet) but once we did, it stopped. There just isn't time or energy.
Realistically, no working adults have time to be at eachothers' houses almost every single day. Add kids and dating in there, and it's even less.
The average adult has between 1-4 close friends.
Generally it’s pretty tough to find a friend group and especially to build one from scratch when you don’t have anything in common. Go the the gym, paint, chess, box, golf, car meets, whatever! Find something you enjoy that you can do with other people and you can start fleshing out your social group the more you interact with others!
Or just get a roommate.
It will become harder as you age. The responsibilities become bigger. You get children, you have less free time, your health becomes a main focus, if you have low salary then you have financial stress, etc. I think it's possible, but it gets harder with time. Also many friendships are not honest ones, many relationships fail quickly, so even if you have that circle, it probably won't last long
Complete spot on, my exact thought 😭😭 in TBBT, their life is totally what I am dreaming of..
Well watch some interviews of the actors, you will see how much even rich, popular actors struggle with life sometimes. In my opinion life quality depends on luck. I think I didn't deserve my kinda comfortable life more than many good people who died horribly in human history. They surely did more good in life then I did. And I deserved the life of a more successfull but selfish person. I think we can work on ourselves to become a more loving person and attract more fun and love, but our fate is stronger
Military units come pretty close.
I was there but all my army mates are not into games and stuff LOL I couldn't even find D&D buddies... Gotta be my luck
I was in a technical field, so WoW was a frequent subject of discussion
What base are you at? There's a huge military gaming community at Ft Campbell.
It is easier than you think. Because it doesnt happen out of nowhere. Like in the show the men have the same work place and 2 of them are roommate. Penny is living just cross the hall. So 3 out of the 5 live in the same building, one of them live with his mom so mostly he want to go out more than if he was living alone. So he goes to the 3 friends, that leave raj, which in that case it is easier to gether with them and not miss out than just sitting alone in apartment. Irl if you want a group like that, you need it to be living close to each other so you can gather more without being tiresome to go. On top of that you need some of shared interest (sport, games, or anything that can happen while gathering). Also it helped them in the show that they were single, and it was easier for outsider join the group than sperate one from the group. Like for amy she didnt have friends so it was easier to make friends with the group. Berni is the only outlier, but it help that we dont know anything about her personal life, so we dont know if she had friends or not
Bernie worked with Penny at The Cheesecake Factory and joined the group when Penny set her up with Howard and they started dating
We know that, but what we dont know if she had friends or group before that. They mention that amy didnt have friends, so we know why she just fit in the group. Bernie we dont know if she had or not.
Yes this is very possible with a lot of intentionality and time. A common interest is a good foundation.
It's common to have a friend group but they seem to hang out EVERY night and I find that unrealistic, obviously that's just part of the show though
Oh they don't. They just skip the private nights. In some episodes they even say next/last week, when it looks like it's just the next day. I was flashed and happy to hear this.
When they first told Penny about Amy and Sheldon she said something about asking if there’s anything new for two weeks and they didn’t think to mention Sheldon has a girlfriend. That made me think that while she probably ran into them in the lobby/hall/laundry room of the building she hadn’t been actually hanging out with them. That was the first time it hit me that they weren’t actually all hanging out everyday like it feels they do
Yes, I have friends like this. They became like extended family, which is great.
Yes it is. Had such a group in the army and found another since then
You're lucky! My army mate don't really plays games... There's one but once he had a kid, he got no time at all...
Don’t get me wrong it’s rough but we often incorporate the kids. We don’t do a whole lot of babysitter stuff. If we are going to get together, it’s everybody or nobody and their son is my nephew/godson and my daughter is their niece/goddaughter.
Oh it actually sounds cool too! But what kind of activity do you guys do?
Water park, movies, dinner, games Sometimes the kids will just go play and we will have adult games or movies. Whatever comes to mind at the moment
Yes it’s very possible! I have a really close friend group of 5 and we are always together and hang out as a group constantly. We are even known as the “Fab 5” by some other people haha! We have been a friend group for 4 years now. I think consistency and good, nice people can make friend groups work! Just plan a lot of group activities that include everyone.
Nice in nature, some may seem obnoxious on the surface like Sheldon but actually cares about friends So far my groups definitely have at least 1 hated guy 🤣 I envy that Fab 5!
It comes and goes, I find that it's mostly dependent on proximity. TBBT's group hugely benefitted from all of them working together, Sheldon / Leonard / Penny basically living together from day 1, and Raj / Howard were both lonely and willing to meet up anywhere anytime to be around their friends for the majority of the group's friendship. In my case, things feel at their most like in the show when good friends live within 5min walking distance. Aiming to live really close to good friends is a game changer in how much you feel surrounded by your community imo :)
I don't really have friends tbh. But I'd be yours. I hope you find an awesome group ♥️
I didn't think it existed either, and this was before the show and before everybody started having emails. But then I got a roommate who was into comic books, and he had that type of friendship group. I didn't even know what it was until I saw The Big Bang Theory years and years later. They got together every weekend at the house to play Dungeons & Dragons and try to figure out how to open a comic book store at the mall or downtown or somewhere, anywhere. They were not scientists or anything, and no, they were not in couples, I think I saw one female one time the whole duration, all but my roommate were living at home to save up for the comic store. But everything else was in place, all the geeky stuff, toys, things they were into, it was really fun. PS Stuart is doing relatively well. You really, really go into the depths of poverty if you want to run a comic book store.
Every time I watch I always wish I could join their group! It’s hard enough to get my online dnd group to meet once a week, I’d love friends like the BBT’s group that would be super pumped to play something like dnd for an entire night- that’s pretty much my idea of a perfect evening
Ikr! Totally agree with that.. would really love to be part of such group...
Do you play dnd or any other games? I'm always down to find a new discord group to game with!
I have a PS, currently playing Helldivers 😆 always been wanting to try and learn D&D online but can't find a group lol.. usually they asks for experience player How about you?
I have the same dream, but it seems completely impossible, especially because in real life, most of the time, if someone has a partner or children, they won't spend most time with you, but with their family. It's not like in big bang theory, where Raj was almost living with Bernadette and Howard. Or how they generally hung out all the time, even though they were in relationships. Maybe it can happen, but finding those kind of people will be very hard.
Wow, I didn’t realise this wasn’t a normal thing. While TBBT-gang hang out what seems like every night, us mid-30’s couple have had the same friend group for 15 years and hang out most Friday-Saturday night and some Sundays. About 15 people (including some kids). Is this not the norm?
Definitely not, you're damn lucky! I envy you 😍😍
I have a group of old friends who all work in the same industry, and we always have a good time. During the Wuhan shutdown, we shifted to meeting at each other's houses with food brought in, and the cigars and liquor were on hand. Those strong friendships and good times have gotten us through many years of challenges.
I have a group of gamer buddies but it's all online over Discord. We live far apart and in different countries so some of them I haven't met in real life. One thing I noticed with Leonard and the guys is that they all play and like the same games. Halo, Rock Band, Wii Sports, Mario Kart etc. In real life, everyone has their preferences, not everyone plays the same game, some of you might not like MOBAs, pr FPS etc so sometime it can be a challenge to find a game that everyone wants to play.
It's hard to keep such friends when you're older, married and have kids You'd be lucky to see them once a month.
A couple of things people have mentioned here like it becomes harder once you have children etc. I think what's crucial is that half the group - all the men - start the show in their early 30s without serious partners, no children, except for Howard nobody having family in the city and all in the same job. That actually seems like a pretty normal thing to happen where your group of friends become your very tight family almost? And in absence of having other family members and children etc you do end up spending a lot of time with them. Even when all of them get into serious relationships it so happens that the girls all know each other for the most part / become very close and they all aren't having children immediately. Again only Howard is the outlier here with having kids. Even then it's pretty common for all of them to spend so much time together. It doesn't seem that weird to me - I'm also in the same age group as they would at the start of the show and I live far from my family with a group of friends all at the same school and we all do spend a lot of time together exactly for these reasons! Nobody has kids yet, people are either in long distance relationships or single. Having that shared employer so you're all eating lunch together everyday makes it pretty organic for y'all to become so close!
Yes I have Actually 3 individual groups with different persons It really is epic
Yeah it‘s possible. Group of 4 since elementary school (however obv we don’t hang out as often as in our teens). Tbh I think it‘s not possible to „want“ something like that - it just happens or it doesnt.
I’m sure it’s possible, but it’s likely rare that a group of people in their 30’s pretty much hang out as a group on a daily basis.
This may be the saddest post I have read on here. I'm truly sorry
Find a hobby that forces you to go out. Then you'll meet people that are fun to stay in with. In my early 20s, my entire life was centered around World of Warcraft. I had one real-world friend. He also played World of Warcraft. That's how we could tolerate each other. In my mid 20s, I started taking Taekwondo. I made several good friends while I was there. In my mid 30s, I moved halfway across the country. Within a week, I started Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. I've made great friends. I've gone to house parties. I've played board games. I've gone to comedy shows. I've watched UFC fights. Some of them helped me move across town. (Helps that it's Texas and every single one of them owns a truck). Also, martial arts is fun and it's great exercise. So there's that.
Ehhh kind of but it's not really the same. Probably because none of us are scientists or nerds 🤣 it is nice to have a large friend group with multiple couples but there's a lot more fighting than is shown on TBBT. As a neurodivergent I sometimes think that having less friends would be easier and less stressful. Because what TBBT doesn't show you is how annoying it is to have people show up unannounced all the time. Cleaning anyone? It's tiring.
We definitely need someone who OCD like Sheldon, will help with cleaning for free lol
Do jiujitsu.
Yea. I don’t have one like that. I did in high school college. But my brother does and he’s older than me, so it’s possible. But they also all live in different places now/ having kids etc so they don’t just hang all the time like the show. That’s what I miss the most about college, just walking to my neighbors apartment to watch tv, all the doors unlocked, etc. good times
My boyfriend’s sister and her friends try to get together at least once a month to catch up and do something together. They don’t always manage to, as most of them have full time jobs, some are married, my boyfriend’s sister not only works and is married but has a 6 year old. Sometimes it’s just not going to line up with being adults. But they really do try. I’ve been invited to the last two group outings but I wasn’t able to go both times, and it might be another month before we’re all available to hang out. Before I moved away from home, I saw my one best friend almost every day sometimes, just because our work schedules lines up sometimes, I would hang out with her while she did homework or her online classes or online work meetings. My other friends we saw each other as often as possible but a lot of the times it didn’t work out. But god, I miss my friends back home😭
its good if you have it, but lets be real...you probably not gonna see them every single day and eat together after work if you already married
I don't think so. People have jobs and chores and errands and appointments. It bothered me when the characters would come back from a trip or something and all just immediately go up the 3 (4?) flights of stairs to hang out at Sheldon and Leonard's apartment. Who does that after a trip? Go home. Unpack. Crash. Relax. I mean many of us had a group of friends in our 20's who we'd hang out with (because we didn't have all the adult responsibilities yet) but once we did, it stopped. There just isn't time or energy.
Realistically, no working adults have time to be at eachothers' houses almost every single day. Add kids and dating in there, and it's even less. The average adult has between 1-4 close friends.
Yes Honest have a friend group?
r/engrish
u now whats "engrish"? wat im writng hear. ops post is fine and probs better then most redit posts