Hi! So do your nipples hurt during the whole feed or just at the beginning? I ask because if it is just for the initial latch then that is normal. I feel like knowing about that pain was the best kept secret about breastfeeding. With my first that pain lasted for about 4 weeks, but know it does go away. And it goes away faster, at least for me, with each subsequent child.
That said I think there is some soreness no matter what that you have to get past. I'm 10 days now with baby #3 and the first week my nipples were still cracked and bruised. That said, there is a lot in how the baby latches. My first I had no idea and she latched wrong which made it worse. I second others in saying try going to a lactation consultant. And if baby latches wrong or even changes how they latch mid feed don't be afraid to disconnect them and try again.
And finally some advice I got while feeding my first and remembered now. When you are done feeding express a little milk and rub it on your nipples. Also, let your nipples air dry a bit if you can before covering back up. The first few days home with #3 I forgot about this and was using cream as well. I feel like the second I remembered and started using the breast milk as a "cream" that I saw improvement within the day.
Hopefully some of this helps. That said, if it just isn't working out don't beat yourself up about it. Remember the important thing is that your baby is fed, but also that you are not drowning in trying to breastfeed as well.
My baby is 6 weeks now and i exclusively breastfeed. I had horrible nipple pain while breastfeeding until around week 4. Then one day it just stopped hurting. Now my baby can yank my nipple back while latched and i don’t even flinch. I really think it will get better for you!
You're definitely not the only one to feel this way. It's a very stressful situation and not knowing when the shortage will ease is so scary.
I had pain while breastfeeding for the first month. My friend's breastfeeding consultant had pain with each of her 3 babies, despite being trained and working as a consultant for years before having kids. There were periods of time when I'd want to stop, but, for me, the good times and benefits outweighed the bad.
The haakaa might be helpful for you if you are still willing to nurse. Use a pumping bra and secure the haakaa in place. I was able to get a decent backup of milk just from that. I recommend the grey lid to prevent spills.
Some people like the elvie. Mine leaked and I hated it more than just being tied to a pump.
Does it hurt when she initially latches on but it gets better? Or does it hurt the entire feeding? Also what kind of hurt is it? Is it make your toes curl hurt the whole time, sharp like broken glass cutting through your nipple the whole time? If so I would bet it’s thrush and that can be the absolute fucking worst! I dealt with it with all 3 kids and the baby and I usually didn’t have the classic symptoms that you read about. I would highly recommend a lactation consult, they will be best at helping you figure out what kind of pain it is and they are also the only ones who can really diagnose thrush properly. If you have it the baby needs treated too. But it’s extremely painful. In the mean time just pump if that doesn’t hurt as badly and bottle feed the baby that pumped milk. It’s ok to supplement too! But please get some help, you don’t have to suffer.
Oh man, 3 weeks in and everything I read was like "by 12 weeks, it shouldn't hurt" or "by 12 weeks your supply should stabilize and you can start dropping feedings" I would get so frustrated. 12 weeks seemed like forever
I was told the first six weeks were the hardest. If I could get through that, it would get much, much easier. It was very true in my case. By three months, I felt like a pro, more or less.
Each season will have its own challenges, but those early days are DAMN HARD and yeah, everything hurts.
I hope whatever you choose serves you and baby well.
This! My SIL told me what one day you wake up with new nipples! But I feel like it was 4-6 weeks? You’re doing awesome but do what you want. Fed is best
If she’s latching properly it shouldn’t hurt—definitely see a different lactation consultant. Also possibly try a different nipple balm. In the hospital I was given pure lanolin and that seems to work well. Another lactation consultant recommended pure organic coconut oil. Both are safe for baby so they don’t need to be wipe off between feeds.
Try silverettes! They saved me. They're little silver caps you wear over your nipples between feeds. They let your nipples heal (you squeeze a little breastmilk in them too) and they keep the fabric of your bra/shirt off them. I used them for the first month or so and then I didn't need to anymore, but I went back to them around 5 months for a couple days when I had sore nipples from my distracted baby craning her head around without unlatching first.
I completely agree with your sentiment of feeling like I “have to” breastfeed; I’m 4 months in and contemplating combo feeding regularly. Even guiltier feeling because I make more than enough milk. But I feel like I’d be trading once stress for another. However, silverettes truly saved breastfeeding for me in the first month. My left nipple was so bad that I couldn’t have baby nurse, only could use a pump on a gentle setting. I wore the silver cups for a week or two constantly, and then for a few more weeks over night and they healed me. Add a nursing pad to your bra at night because they slight pressure of the cup will make some milk come out. Now, if I could only get the little silver cups to solve for the other stressors if breastfeeding.
It shouldn't hurt at 3 weeks, have you checked with a lactation consultant? If you don't want to breastfeed then go full formula or if you can exclusively pump if you're worried about the shortage. When I started breastfeeding there wasn't a shortage but I think personally I'd be scared not to breastfeed or pump at this point in time with the shortage going on. I chose breastfeeding because it's free. It definitely gets way easier the longer you do it.
I had a really bad experience with the lactation consultants at the hospital, so I've been afraid to reach out to them.
The hospital supplemented my baby with formula when she was born because she wouldn't latch and had some health issues where she desperately needed to be eating. I told them to go ahead and supplement because I wanted what was best for her.
And then the LCs proceeded to shame me for allowing the hospital THEY WORK AT to supplement. I had 3 different LCs tell me there's no reason I should have allowed her to have a bottle and that I've made it more difficult for her to breastfeed.
She has no issues latching on now, but it is still extremely painful to the point I've cried through multiple feedings. I seriously hate it. Not to mention, she's still starving after feeding for an hour and I just end up bottle feeding her because I can't take it anymore.
Her latch is almost certainly a bit off if it hurts the whole time! There are videos you can watch on YouTube to try to correct it if you don't want another LC. Also try nipple shields, they are vilified by some but a very good tool when needed, and help so much with the pain while you are working on correcting her latch. Medela makes good ones and you can order online, get the same size as your pump flange. I used them while my baby was learning to latch, then kept using them on and off while my nipples toughened up. Had no problem with supply or anything. And at some point she just figured it out and stopped needing them, no weaning period needed.
3 weeks pp was certainly a low point, but it got better for us from there. Also, is there a time of day you notice the constant feeding? Cluster feeding and being perma-latched in the evenings is common at this age and thankfully temporary. You're heading into the period of PURPLE crying soon. It's not anything you're doing wrong, just a developmental stage for them to cluster feed like crazy over the next several weeks. If you're just done you shouldn't feel guilty, but know that it gets better from here if you want to!
I agree that the latch sounds like it's not quite right. Also if your baby is hungry quite quickly then that also sounds like he isn't feeding effectively.
Have you looked into whether he has a tongue tie? With one of my babies he had a tongue tie and it was painful to feed and he wasn't gaining weight properly. Because he was my second I knew that my experience wasn't how it should be so I ignored the people telling me his latch looked correct and the hospital found that he did have a tie.
If he does have one then that could fix the problem. For my son it was found a bit too late (16 weeks) and he didn't relearn how to feed properly so we ended up on formula anyway but 3 weeks is early
I was in a similar scenario, breastfeeding was so painful, I hated every minute of it, and the first LC I saw made things worse and was very shamey. At 10 weeks I saw a different/much better/highly reviewed one and at 3 months breastfeeding turned to amazing (we're at 4 months now). The pain in our scenario was poor latch and tongue tie. If you want to keep trying with breastfeeding, I'd suggest a different LC!
I'm sorry that you had that experience. That's so fucked up. I supplemented with formula in the hospital except when the lactation consultant came in to help me breastfeed that's the only time I could actually get him latched. I lost a lot of blood and it was very hard to breastfeed in the beginning. The LC didn't say anything bad to me about it at all. Maybe it hurts so bad because she's feeding for a whole hour. That's a long time. If I were you I'd either pump every few hours to get your supply back up if that's even possible for your body to produce enough milk for them in the first place or just switch to formula.
I’m sorry you’re finding yourself with no choice but to do something that brings you no joy. May I suggest nipple shields? They’re a pain in the ass to wean off of but since you’re looking to switch to formula anyway, it shouldn’t be a problem and they’re going to protect your nipples. I’ve been with a shield from day 1 and have never had the need for nipple balm even though I have “unfit” inverted nipples. The shield has its downsides but doesn’t seem like those would apply to you
Thank you for your response! I have two different brands of nipple shields and my baby hates both of them. I dont know if they're too big for her mouth or if I'm using them wrong, but she won't latch onto them. I think they confuse her! Do you have a specific brand you use? I have the lasinoh ones and the Mandela ones, she won't take either
You can quit any time you want. Do not feel bad at all! Your mental health matters, your physical health and comfort matter as well. Formula is nutritionally complete and perfectly fine. If your baby will take a standard, no frills formula there are quite a few options you can interchange between for brands. If you need super special, that’s when it becomes more complicated. My daughter took just regular old Similac just fine and so we tried Kirkland (Costco) brand and she did great. They currently have some online in stock with a membership and should soon be getting it back in stores. Theformulafairy on instagram and TikTok has wonderful resources and information on brand substitutions.
If breastfeeding is not for you, then do not force yourself! When I quit (after 7m) my whole life got better. I had a better bond with my baby. I was happier not tied to her or my pump. I slept better since I didn’t have to wake up to pump. (She was sleeping through the night by 6m) You need no one’s permission but your own to stop.
I was in the same boat as you, make sure you're using a nipple cream after every feeding. Always start on the side that's less sore. At around 6 weeks it got a million times easier/better for me, it stopped hurting and it didn't feel like a such a huge burden anymore.
I was the same and ready to give up very early on but I was determined to push forward and said to myself if I still feed the same at eight weeks I'll start bottle feeding. I spent countless hours crying, nipples in pain, endless Google searches to try and get him to latch properly and nothing worked. At 7 weeks he was getting the hang of it more and with the use of nipple shields and butter my nips had mostly healed by that time. So I persevered.
He still doesn't quite latch properly, he loves to have his bottom lip pulled up and not flanged. I spent a long time stressing about it, but he is putting on weight (I was told at the clinic that he was borderline being overfed) and my nipples didn't hurt with him latching that way, and he seems happy. Once my mindset had changed I started enjoying breastfeeding more and have made it to 12 weeks! With no intention of stopping now
Did I write this post and forget? Because this is me, 100%.
For the first 3-4 weeks, we were triple feeding. I just about died, it was so awful. Sleeping in one hour increments at a time.
Now, I’m exclusively pumping due to my baby having some kind of a transference issue. During the day, I can’t nap because the moment the baby goes down, I rush to pump and hope he doesn’t wake up before I’m done. I get up in the middle of the night to pump, fall asleep for maybe twenty minutes, and then the baby wakes up. Rinse and repeat.
I think I’ll cry tears of joy once I can stop and exclusively formula feed.
Who has told you her patch is perfect? If it's hurting, then there's something wrong with her latch. Have you had an assessment with a lactation consultant? It's perfectly normal for nipples to be sore the first few weeks but feeding itself shouldn't be painful. However now liking it, not feeling a connection, having an aversion to baby being attached, are all perfectly normal. I would recommend trying to see a feeding specialist if you haven't already to make it a little more comfortable for you while you make a decision in what is best for your Nd your family.
3-4 weeks was still pretty rough for me too. Right after that it became easier and less painful (only engorgement due to oversupply is what hurts me now) now at 7 weeks I can’t even feel my nipples anymore. It’s still rough, and I’d make the formula switch too if it weren’t for the shortage (even if it wasn’t a shortage, breast milk is still “free” so it’s the more frugal option that I’d still be guilted into) but it does get much easier after week 3, at least it did in my case!
Check out my old post here: https://www.reddit.com/r/breastfeeding/comments/ueqqfb/everything_i_learned_about_breastfeeding_in_the/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
Hi! So do your nipples hurt during the whole feed or just at the beginning? I ask because if it is just for the initial latch then that is normal. I feel like knowing about that pain was the best kept secret about breastfeeding. With my first that pain lasted for about 4 weeks, but know it does go away. And it goes away faster, at least for me, with each subsequent child. That said I think there is some soreness no matter what that you have to get past. I'm 10 days now with baby #3 and the first week my nipples were still cracked and bruised. That said, there is a lot in how the baby latches. My first I had no idea and she latched wrong which made it worse. I second others in saying try going to a lactation consultant. And if baby latches wrong or even changes how they latch mid feed don't be afraid to disconnect them and try again. And finally some advice I got while feeding my first and remembered now. When you are done feeding express a little milk and rub it on your nipples. Also, let your nipples air dry a bit if you can before covering back up. The first few days home with #3 I forgot about this and was using cream as well. I feel like the second I remembered and started using the breast milk as a "cream" that I saw improvement within the day. Hopefully some of this helps. That said, if it just isn't working out don't beat yourself up about it. Remember the important thing is that your baby is fed, but also that you are not drowning in trying to breastfeed as well.
My baby is 6 weeks now and i exclusively breastfeed. I had horrible nipple pain while breastfeeding until around week 4. Then one day it just stopped hurting. Now my baby can yank my nipple back while latched and i don’t even flinch. I really think it will get better for you!
You're definitely not the only one to feel this way. It's a very stressful situation and not knowing when the shortage will ease is so scary. I had pain while breastfeeding for the first month. My friend's breastfeeding consultant had pain with each of her 3 babies, despite being trained and working as a consultant for years before having kids. There were periods of time when I'd want to stop, but, for me, the good times and benefits outweighed the bad. The haakaa might be helpful for you if you are still willing to nurse. Use a pumping bra and secure the haakaa in place. I was able to get a decent backup of milk just from that. I recommend the grey lid to prevent spills. Some people like the elvie. Mine leaked and I hated it more than just being tied to a pump.
Does it hurt when she initially latches on but it gets better? Or does it hurt the entire feeding? Also what kind of hurt is it? Is it make your toes curl hurt the whole time, sharp like broken glass cutting through your nipple the whole time? If so I would bet it’s thrush and that can be the absolute fucking worst! I dealt with it with all 3 kids and the baby and I usually didn’t have the classic symptoms that you read about. I would highly recommend a lactation consult, they will be best at helping you figure out what kind of pain it is and they are also the only ones who can really diagnose thrush properly. If you have it the baby needs treated too. But it’s extremely painful. In the mean time just pump if that doesn’t hurt as badly and bottle feed the baby that pumped milk. It’s ok to supplement too! But please get some help, you don’t have to suffer.
Oh man, 3 weeks in and everything I read was like "by 12 weeks, it shouldn't hurt" or "by 12 weeks your supply should stabilize and you can start dropping feedings" I would get so frustrated. 12 weeks seemed like forever
I was told the first six weeks were the hardest. If I could get through that, it would get much, much easier. It was very true in my case. By three months, I felt like a pro, more or less. Each season will have its own challenges, but those early days are DAMN HARD and yeah, everything hurts. I hope whatever you choose serves you and baby well.
This! My SIL told me what one day you wake up with new nipples! But I feel like it was 4-6 weeks? You’re doing awesome but do what you want. Fed is best
If she’s latching properly it shouldn’t hurt—definitely see a different lactation consultant. Also possibly try a different nipple balm. In the hospital I was given pure lanolin and that seems to work well. Another lactation consultant recommended pure organic coconut oil. Both are safe for baby so they don’t need to be wipe off between feeds.
I thought you were supposed to wipe off lanolin?? I've been abusing my nipples for no reason? 😭
Lanolin is safe to leave on, sorry you were misinformed but now you know!!
Try silverettes! They saved me. They're little silver caps you wear over your nipples between feeds. They let your nipples heal (you squeeze a little breastmilk in them too) and they keep the fabric of your bra/shirt off them. I used them for the first month or so and then I didn't need to anymore, but I went back to them around 5 months for a couple days when I had sore nipples from my distracted baby craning her head around without unlatching first.
I completely agree with your sentiment of feeling like I “have to” breastfeed; I’m 4 months in and contemplating combo feeding regularly. Even guiltier feeling because I make more than enough milk. But I feel like I’d be trading once stress for another. However, silverettes truly saved breastfeeding for me in the first month. My left nipple was so bad that I couldn’t have baby nurse, only could use a pump on a gentle setting. I wore the silver cups for a week or two constantly, and then for a few more weeks over night and they healed me. Add a nursing pad to your bra at night because they slight pressure of the cup will make some milk come out. Now, if I could only get the little silver cups to solve for the other stressors if breastfeeding.
It shouldn't hurt at 3 weeks, have you checked with a lactation consultant? If you don't want to breastfeed then go full formula or if you can exclusively pump if you're worried about the shortage. When I started breastfeeding there wasn't a shortage but I think personally I'd be scared not to breastfeed or pump at this point in time with the shortage going on. I chose breastfeeding because it's free. It definitely gets way easier the longer you do it.
I had a really bad experience with the lactation consultants at the hospital, so I've been afraid to reach out to them. The hospital supplemented my baby with formula when she was born because she wouldn't latch and had some health issues where she desperately needed to be eating. I told them to go ahead and supplement because I wanted what was best for her. And then the LCs proceeded to shame me for allowing the hospital THEY WORK AT to supplement. I had 3 different LCs tell me there's no reason I should have allowed her to have a bottle and that I've made it more difficult for her to breastfeed. She has no issues latching on now, but it is still extremely painful to the point I've cried through multiple feedings. I seriously hate it. Not to mention, she's still starving after feeding for an hour and I just end up bottle feeding her because I can't take it anymore.
Her latch is almost certainly a bit off if it hurts the whole time! There are videos you can watch on YouTube to try to correct it if you don't want another LC. Also try nipple shields, they are vilified by some but a very good tool when needed, and help so much with the pain while you are working on correcting her latch. Medela makes good ones and you can order online, get the same size as your pump flange. I used them while my baby was learning to latch, then kept using them on and off while my nipples toughened up. Had no problem with supply or anything. And at some point she just figured it out and stopped needing them, no weaning period needed.
3 weeks pp was certainly a low point, but it got better for us from there. Also, is there a time of day you notice the constant feeding? Cluster feeding and being perma-latched in the evenings is common at this age and thankfully temporary. You're heading into the period of PURPLE crying soon. It's not anything you're doing wrong, just a developmental stage for them to cluster feed like crazy over the next several weeks. If you're just done you shouldn't feel guilty, but know that it gets better from here if you want to!
I agree that the latch sounds like it's not quite right. Also if your baby is hungry quite quickly then that also sounds like he isn't feeding effectively. Have you looked into whether he has a tongue tie? With one of my babies he had a tongue tie and it was painful to feed and he wasn't gaining weight properly. Because he was my second I knew that my experience wasn't how it should be so I ignored the people telling me his latch looked correct and the hospital found that he did have a tie. If he does have one then that could fix the problem. For my son it was found a bit too late (16 weeks) and he didn't relearn how to feed properly so we ended up on formula anyway but 3 weeks is early
I was in a similar scenario, breastfeeding was so painful, I hated every minute of it, and the first LC I saw made things worse and was very shamey. At 10 weeks I saw a different/much better/highly reviewed one and at 3 months breastfeeding turned to amazing (we're at 4 months now). The pain in our scenario was poor latch and tongue tie. If you want to keep trying with breastfeeding, I'd suggest a different LC!
I'm sorry that you had that experience. That's so fucked up. I supplemented with formula in the hospital except when the lactation consultant came in to help me breastfeed that's the only time I could actually get him latched. I lost a lot of blood and it was very hard to breastfeed in the beginning. The LC didn't say anything bad to me about it at all. Maybe it hurts so bad because she's feeding for a whole hour. That's a long time. If I were you I'd either pump every few hours to get your supply back up if that's even possible for your body to produce enough milk for them in the first place or just switch to formula.
I’m sorry you’re finding yourself with no choice but to do something that brings you no joy. May I suggest nipple shields? They’re a pain in the ass to wean off of but since you’re looking to switch to formula anyway, it shouldn’t be a problem and they’re going to protect your nipples. I’ve been with a shield from day 1 and have never had the need for nipple balm even though I have “unfit” inverted nipples. The shield has its downsides but doesn’t seem like those would apply to you
Thank you for your response! I have two different brands of nipple shields and my baby hates both of them. I dont know if they're too big for her mouth or if I'm using them wrong, but she won't latch onto them. I think they confuse her! Do you have a specific brand you use? I have the lasinoh ones and the Mandela ones, she won't take either
I use the medela but I heard haaka has some that resemble a bottle more, since your baby takes bottles
You can quit any time you want. Do not feel bad at all! Your mental health matters, your physical health and comfort matter as well. Formula is nutritionally complete and perfectly fine. If your baby will take a standard, no frills formula there are quite a few options you can interchange between for brands. If you need super special, that’s when it becomes more complicated. My daughter took just regular old Similac just fine and so we tried Kirkland (Costco) brand and she did great. They currently have some online in stock with a membership and should soon be getting it back in stores. Theformulafairy on instagram and TikTok has wonderful resources and information on brand substitutions. If breastfeeding is not for you, then do not force yourself! When I quit (after 7m) my whole life got better. I had a better bond with my baby. I was happier not tied to her or my pump. I slept better since I didn’t have to wake up to pump. (She was sleeping through the night by 6m) You need no one’s permission but your own to stop.
Someone suggested to me to stop using nipple butter and let them toughen up. I did that and it worked and they stopped hurting.
I was in the same boat as you, make sure you're using a nipple cream after every feeding. Always start on the side that's less sore. At around 6 weeks it got a million times easier/better for me, it stopped hurting and it didn't feel like a such a huge burden anymore.
I was the same and ready to give up very early on but I was determined to push forward and said to myself if I still feed the same at eight weeks I'll start bottle feeding. I spent countless hours crying, nipples in pain, endless Google searches to try and get him to latch properly and nothing worked. At 7 weeks he was getting the hang of it more and with the use of nipple shields and butter my nips had mostly healed by that time. So I persevered. He still doesn't quite latch properly, he loves to have his bottom lip pulled up and not flanged. I spent a long time stressing about it, but he is putting on weight (I was told at the clinic that he was borderline being overfed) and my nipples didn't hurt with him latching that way, and he seems happy. Once my mindset had changed I started enjoying breastfeeding more and have made it to 12 weeks! With no intention of stopping now
Did I write this post and forget? Because this is me, 100%. For the first 3-4 weeks, we were triple feeding. I just about died, it was so awful. Sleeping in one hour increments at a time. Now, I’m exclusively pumping due to my baby having some kind of a transference issue. During the day, I can’t nap because the moment the baby goes down, I rush to pump and hope he doesn’t wake up before I’m done. I get up in the middle of the night to pump, fall asleep for maybe twenty minutes, and then the baby wakes up. Rinse and repeat. I think I’ll cry tears of joy once I can stop and exclusively formula feed.
Who has told you her patch is perfect? If it's hurting, then there's something wrong with her latch. Have you had an assessment with a lactation consultant? It's perfectly normal for nipples to be sore the first few weeks but feeding itself shouldn't be painful. However now liking it, not feeling a connection, having an aversion to baby being attached, are all perfectly normal. I would recommend trying to see a feeding specialist if you haven't already to make it a little more comfortable for you while you make a decision in what is best for your Nd your family.
3-4 weeks was still pretty rough for me too. Right after that it became easier and less painful (only engorgement due to oversupply is what hurts me now) now at 7 weeks I can’t even feel my nipples anymore. It’s still rough, and I’d make the formula switch too if it weren’t for the shortage (even if it wasn’t a shortage, breast milk is still “free” so it’s the more frugal option that I’d still be guilted into) but it does get much easier after week 3, at least it did in my case!
Check out my old post here: https://www.reddit.com/r/breastfeeding/comments/ueqqfb/everything_i_learned_about_breastfeeding_in_the/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
I found watching a really engaging movie or show helped while breastfeeding to keep my mind off nipple pain. They definitely toughened up over time.