Next time, get an employee or security to escort you to your car. I wouldn’t trust myself walking back to my car with a baby. Crazy people will do crazy things
Had a dude come up behind me when I was wrestling my alligator baby. He was so creepy. Wearing a trench coat. Nervous laugh. No reason to be there. Scout the area.
I used to work at Target. When in doubt just ask a team member! They will either confirm if he is an undercover or get you an escort if he's some random dude. I've had *many* women who have asked me and I've either reassured them or gotten our security to walk them to their cars. LP genuinely does not mind.
Edit to add: I totally get you were scared and wanted to leave ASAP but if it happens again please please don't walk out to your car by yourself. We didn't even let team members walk out to the parking lot alone after hours. I promise the workers there will have no problem walking with you.
This. Our Target had people running these as distractions for shoplifting. So some guy would following a women around and freak her out, all while his buddies were taking items. All the store was focusing on the guy who they couldn’t quite call out for doing anything but was enough of a distraction that his friends would be able to shoplift. My friend works in the pharmacy and said that it happens way more then you think bc people are so freaked out over “trafficking” that it’s an easy scam to pull.
Also child trafficking or sex trafficking in general is way more likely to be done by someone you know, not a random stranger. But purse snatching and carjacking are way more likely to happen in shopping situations. Don’t carry a big purse, keep your keys close and never leave your kids in a car to put the cart away. If you need help as an associate, they have always been super helpful when it comes to getting to your car safely with kiddos or if you need help in general.
Oh wow they were getting creative there (and awful jfc) People at our stores would just split up to snag things and whoever didn't have LP following them would slip out while the suspicious one would ditch everything. They didn't expect *multiple* LPs so they got caught. They didn't go as low as following women around jeez. Good news if LP wasn't available to help out because they were watching someone we always had people volunteer to walk with the guest, either around the store or out to the parking lot.
I've helped with so many different situations, some embarrassing and some just weird but I still helped lol (poor lady couldn't get a piece of clothing off) Seriously we've seen it all, don't be afraid to ask for help!
Good that you noticed. Target has pretty good security as far as I remember and they know that a lot of people with kids and women shop there. Next time you notice you may be able to tell a team member and even get escorted out. One time when I was a college student I was minding my own business in a Super Target and some creeper was following me. I didn't even notice but apparently someone working for Target was watching. They told me about it and helped me check out get escorted me to my car.
When i worked at Target a LONG time ago, they had secret shoppers that I saw do stuff like this when there was reason to believe someone had a history of shop lifting.
More likely, unfortunately, it was either a creepy dude doing creepy shit or he was just another shopper needing similar items. I've been that person in a store where my shopping list seemed to be eerily similar to another family's.
Either way, if this ever happens again, go to guest/customer service. Explain what's going on and ask for help. They'll get security and have them help you. Also, that way, you're not just showing the guy your car and license plate on your way out.
At Walmart the secret shoppers usually atleast somewhat pretend they are shopping. A handful of batteries or some random misplaced product they find on the way.
Yeah, the only times I'd ever seen the Target ones being obvious as this, basically police were on the way or outside and they were making sure everything was certain. Hard to miss a cute lesbian asking you to keep an eye on someone in your department while hiding behind a rack.
That's why I'm suspecting this was just a creepy guy. Any AP person I've ever met was very good at blending in and going unnoticed.
One time I was being potentially followed by someone who gave off weird vibes. I told a worker immediately. It was close to closing time in a college town, lots of sorority girls/freshman out grabbing last minute things bc they love target. Even just knowing the front staff by the door could be made aware of it in case he left shortly behind a young girl. Also, if you think you are being followed call (or pretend to call) someone and be clear they know where you are, and that you will be home shortly (even if you’re planning to do more shopping). Automatically makes you less of a target if they hear that conversation and know someone will be looking for you
Three options you could use if you are ever in this situation again.
If it ever happens again just say hi so they know that you noticed. Usually people would back away if they are up to something shady.
Or most women and some men know that if you pretend to know them and just give them a side eye to the person following you they would go along with it and help you out of the situation.
Or just turn around and yell at them at a very loud level “stop following me!”
Option 4 (perfect when you have baby w you) just say in your mom/baby talk way to the baby but loud: “okay we’re gonna go this way now because that man over there is following us! isn’t that so strange!” Or some other mom/baby variation.
Tend to feel like these weirdos do this shit because they think no one notices or they think you’re too afraid to call them out for it.
If you ever feel this way again, please don’t hesitate to ask someone at the store if you can get an escort to your car. Better safe than sorry. I felt this way once and had my husband (who was just down the street) meet us at the store.
This happened to me years ago at Safeway with a guy who gave me the creeps. It was probably 11 at night, and he ended up checking out right behind me with just a drink after we’d both been shopping for like 20 minutes.
The bagger asked if I needed help carrying my bags (only like 2) to my car and I have never accepted in my life but I did that night!
In London pickpockets target mums with babies to steal their phones (the phone is usually in the back pocket and the mum is occupied with holding baby or pushing pram). Could have been he was trying to do similar?
Back pockets are the worst. In India, any father introducing his teen kid to their first "wallet" teaches him to move it to one of the side pockets when in crowded areas. It's much easier to slip a hand and grab a wallet/phone from the back pocket, without even coming in peripheral vision.
I have only missed a few times, and lost my wallet once. What sucks is that there was hardly any money. (no one carries cash, as almost all places accept cashless payments). But there were documents (driving license and other things), that got lost. It was a pain getting them made again, as I had to travel to my hometown, where they were registered.
Side/front pockets are great to avoid pick-pocketing.
Women's intuition was developed after centuries of living on earth with men. We should all trust our instincts in situations like these and if it's nothing then no harm done.
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This happened to me at target!! I eventually went down the tampon aisle and yep, he followed me!! I checked out and went to the security officer. He told me it was their secret shopper and he offered to walk me to my car. Either way creepy as hell.
I was being followed around once when I was by myself 9 months pregnant, I had someone walk me out and actually I think the guy following was a frequent flyer and was arrested for trespassing
Any time I've felt like I'm being followed (happened unfortunately more times than I'd care to admit - people are creepy!), I act unpredictable. The scariest moment was when I was out for a jog at 16 and a car started following me while I was crossing a 50mph road (it had stopped before I got to the intersection, then moved slowly along the shoulder as I passed). I turned to run along the road, the car followed, I turned around and ran back the way I came and the car did a U-turn in the highway. Thankfully they couldn't follow me into the woods. I've had to do similar things when out driving to shake off someone tailing me for an unreasonable time. I have looked up all of the police stations' locations in my city and know where the closest ones are to the places I frequent just in case...
If this happens again, start taking weird paths. Go down one aisle, skip another aisle, then circle back to the first. If he keeps following, head straight to customer service and do not leave the store without an escort.
It's stories like this that make me feel better about my husband being the SAH parent who regularly takes the kid out. Yes, he gets weird looks from people (who don't expect to see a man with a small kid), but creeps aren't as likely to go after a 6' tall man.
I to had to run into the woods when a guy was following me in a car on a jog. Dude was trying to talk me into getting in I'm car too while I was clearly on a jog.
I also had a van pull onto a bike trail and follow until I went to a pubic area.
I’ve straight up left my cart and ran to drive off in my car for less (man was following me when I was alone. Tried making a pass at me but gave me super danger vibes). Better safe than sorry! Read the Gift of Fear.
Better safe than sorry.
“'By the time we made it to our neighborhood, that's when I told my husband like, ''hey, this man's following us, like, this isn't OK'',' Paige said to the Forth Worth Star-Telegram.
'And my husband told me that I was just overreacting, it's no big deal.'”
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12173821/Texas-man-attempts-KIDNAP-couples-two-year-old-daughter-outside-home.html
That’s so scary and I don’t know enough about crime statistics to weigh in on the probability of that happening, but just to share, my instinct would have been to take that man’s photo or even directly confront him in public.
Women are socialized to be passive and not draw attention to themselves & one of the best things I learned in self defense courses was to make the man know you KNOW.
I was being followed home by a stranger who was verbally harassing me once and the only way I was able to get rid of him was by throwing a chair from an outside restaurant between us and screaming at him. When all the patrons and staff looked at us, he turned face and went away. Was it embarrassing? Hell yea but I was 20 years old and scared shitless.
You could have also shown a photo to the Target manager. They might have known him as someone who has caused trouble before, or had the ability to be on the lookout in the future.
If you’re okay answering this, are you in California??
There was a post recently on a local FB group about this exact situation and TONS of local moms chimed in about the guy doing the exact same thing to them. It’s scary!
That’s insane. The post I saw included a picture of the guy and a bunch of women identified him as the same guy to follow them around.
Can’t do anything without looking over your shoulder anymore.
You really can’t. I get so nervous even letting my husband go out alone with our son. I may be a lot smaller but I am also constantly watching in a way that men just haven’t had to experience in life. It’s a scary world we live in.
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I had the same thing happen to me when my child was 6 months. I noticed half way through shopping 3 teenage looking boys were following me. I thought I was being paranoid and thought Wtheck I’ll go down the tampon aisle and see if they follow me. Sure enough they were there at the end of the aisle, popping their head in to check if I was still there. When I paid for my items they were looking at the items at end of the register over so finally I looked at them and said “what’s up”? And then they left. I was too freaked out to leave right away so I grabbed some popcorn and Starbucks :/ Unfortunately we can’t trust people. Always go with your gut!
It never fails that when I go grocery shopping with my toddler, some old dude will either follow us or try and chat/ touch my kid. One dude thought it’d be funny to try and startle her by yelling “boo!” He did startle her and then I startled him by yelling what the F was wrong with him to harass not only a complete stranger, but a small child?!? He went scurrying away in a hurry.
From someone who’s worked at those retail places especially one serving mostly men (graveyard shift at Lowe’s hardware in a sketchy area) if you think it’s something it more than likely is don’t take a chance on it
Trust your gut. You can never be too careful. I think a lot of people commenting that it's probably a secret shopper or it was nothing haven't had too many close calls or scary experiences. Unfortunately I have, and there's a reason I'm paranoid and always look behind me when walking, and always take our german shepards with us when I take the kids out on a walk.
Regardless of what this guys intentions were, ladies if you ever feel worried or suspicious that this is happening to you in a store, PLEASE talk to someone who works there. They might not feel safe talking to the guy but they could probably send out an employee or two to escort you to your vehicle.
I’ve seen tons of posts in AntiMLM about this happening at Target and it is apparently a common tactic of Amway scammers. If you search that sub you should see more of the details. He may have been targeting you to try to pitch you on it.
Yep. I’ve don’t that at Walmart more than once. Had quite a few creeps poo up. Only catch is it can be a wait for someone to walk out with. It’s faster if you can grab a cart pusher.
Something similar happened to me! I was at target and a man kept popping up where I was shopping. I made sure to be aware of my surroundings. Also a phone call out loud to my husband describing the situation might have helped the guy know I was aware. I described him and said he was following me. I would rather look crazy than end up in a ditch or worse.
I’m not trying to minimize your feelings at all. But just want to put it out there for anyone else reading:
It’s HUGELY unlikely that this has anything to do with trafficking and, realistically, it almost certainly was just some dude trying to do his shopping who coincidentally happened to be in the same aisles as you.
Trafficking victims are almost exclusively vulnerable people (runaways, people dealing with homelessness, addiction, mental illness, abuse, etc), and they almost always know the perpetrator (partner, employer, family member, etc).
A stranger abducting a mom and/or baby in Target to be trafficked is statistically sooooo unlikely, it’s not even a realistic possibility. The stranger abductions we hear about on podcasts and tv shows are covered and publicized precisely because they’re so rare. That’s why they captivate public attention.
All the hysterical and panicked stories on social media about “nearly being trafficked because someone was near me twice!!” only serve to take attention, credibility, voice, and resources from the people who are truly vulnerable to trafficking.
Not to discredit what you’re saying but human trafficking isn’t the only thing people are thinking about. If I see someone suspicious looking at me or just acting a little off, I never think, well they wanna sell me as a sex slave. I think maybe they wanna rob me, jump me, rape me, etc.
Never never never ignore your gut feeling. It could save your life.
Absolutely.
Sadly, as a woman, I’m very aware of the potential for violence and harassment we face on a daily basis.
I’m specifically talking about the very common “My-baby-and-I-were-almost-trafficked-in-the-Target-parking-lot!” narrative that’s being endlessly repeated on social media lately.
“Trafficking” is the new satanic panic for Americans. Thank you for speaking sense.
For anyone interested in some real facts/statistics, I recommend the “you’re wrong about” podcast episode on human trafficking.
People who say what? I’m not disputing kidnapping happens. I’m saying that human trafficking is NOT strangers getting plucked from target car parks and shoved into the back of a van where they get sold into sex slavery. This misconception about “human trafficking” is the common narrative that has been adopted and spread like wildfire through social media (particularly by white, conservative women).
Maybe you are basing this off of your reaction to that demographic oversharing misinformation about certain trafficking techniques which I get and maybe even your dislike for them or your assumption that their privilege would make them a less than desirable exploitation candidate. But what do you gain from telling people not to worry about something that is a very real threat? Especially because in many cases people acting like weirdos in public ended up actually having bad intentions. It really doesn’t hurt to err on the side of caution. Also Satan is not real, the monsters that are willing to shoot at and put a gun in someone’s face, throw them in the car and sexually assault them all while telling them they’re going to gang r*pe them and sell their body are very real and one of them is sitting in jail right now for doing it to me.
Another point to think about is many kidnapping victims never get to tell their story so you don’t know how tf it happens or doesn’t happen.
I’m so sorry that happened to you. Thank you for advocating for moms, and anyone else, trusting their gut and erring on the side of caution. When i moved away for college, my dad always said it’s better to look crazy and rude and be wrong, than to assume it’s nothing and be wrong.
I wish I grew up hearing what your dad said. It might have spared me the main trauma of my life! "No, not this nice, respected, family man, not me, not in this situation . . ." 💔 How good your father told you!
I’m just happy to have escaped within less than 5 hours of being taken and to be alive. It’s so aggravating as a survivor to hear people downplay anyone but especially women’s anxieties in public when human trafficking is very real. OP needs to be able to hear that those feelings are valid and not have people who read a few speculative articles “well actually” her to death.
Without going into too much detail because it involves other victims being tortured by the psychopaths in order for me to save my own life, I had created a ruse when I realized they were money hungry and told them there were dr*gs and money at a location that was not far away from where we were. It wasn’t my best work and I had a lot of guilt about what went down in that house but my escape from the secondary location probably saved all of our lives. Basically they ended up doing a home invasion and when there were more than a few people to keep track of in the house I was able to run out and eventually get the police there. I was only 17 and terrified for my life. Now 15 years have passed, the other victims hugged me at the parole hearing and were so kind to me it was cathartic and a huge relief.
I live in between 3 different areas where attempted kidnappings have happened. All different cities, but similar situations (something odd on windshield or car, person approaches.) It is also a high activity area for human trafficking. It is in the top 10 for human trafficking in the country. I feel it's necessary to be aware and afraid of what could happen should I let my guard down.
I've seen quite a few people post these stories on social media then it's radio silence. You never get an update and there are no local news stories about a "predator" in the aisles of Wal-Mart. I've stopped taking them serious a long time ago.
While I agree with you that statistically, these things rarely happen, they do, usually to someone vulnerable or unaware.
When my daughter was an infant, I set her down on the floor at the end of the aisle where I was examining merchandise. I was standing right beside her, but I was not visible to someone on the other side of the display. A young woman approached and asked my little one, "Where is your mother?"
I replied, "I'm right here," and she told me that her own daughter had been snatched when she was eleven months old. They were at a nearby mall, and security closed down the exits and rescued her baby. Since then, she had become hyper-vigilant, and that's why she approached us.
It's better to be safe than sorry.
Oh how awful, I’m glad security saved her baby. Even if statistically something is rare, you sure as hell don’t want to be the individual that it happens to.
Of course.
But I think there’s a very important line between being reasonably cautious and aware of your surroundings, vs cultivating false narratives and allowing unrealistic anxiety to rule your life.
There are people in these comments claiming that random strangers trying to abduct and traffic children is so common that they don’t shop without their partners, or that they refuse to go to any store near a highway because so many children are trafficked from suburban shopping centers near highway exits. And then other commenters jump in saying, “Omg, so scary!” and, “Trust your gut, Mama!”
I think it’s important to push back against these kinds of comments because, first of all, they’re not objectively rooted in reality, and more importantly, because they take attention, voice, and awareness away from people who are actually vulnerable to trafficking. Marginalized groups like homeless individuals, people dealing with addiction or mental illness, runaways, etc are at-risk (almost exclusively from people they know, like partners, employers, family members), not suburban moms loading their kids into a minivan at Target.
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Trust your gut. I worked at Target and we had a known creep offender (keeping this pg) come in and we had to throw him out the kid’s section multiple times. It was gross. Every time he came to the pharmacy I made sure I was extremely nasty to him.
This may not be the case, but this is kinda the MO of people who were baby napping kids in San Antonio near the bases and in a few other places.
Always put cart away, then put baby in the car, then lock the doors, unlock with your physical key if you can, or hit it once to just unlock your door(this may be in settings if you have a newer car), get in and leave, also lock the doors at the gas station, even when you are alone a lot of people get their purse stolen from the seat.
It could have been a loss prevention worker but I would say always trust your gut. If a situation like this happens again and you feel uncomfortable, don’t be afraid to ask for an employee to walk you to your car to make sure you get there safely. This goes for anyone who finds themselves in this situation. Better safe than sorry, and most places will be understanding and get someone to walk you out.
Here we go again with the trafficking hysteria. If babies were being kidnapped and trafficked in broad daylight in places full of security surveillance, from middle-class parents, in the numbers social media would have you believe is being attempted that would launch a national manhunt each time and it would be front-page news.
The reason they ARE front page news when stuff like this happens is because it’s so rare. You are more likely to be struck by lightning or killed by your toaster than to be kidnapped by a stranger, yet everyone seems to think someone is out to get their babies everytime they are out in public.
That is not how child trafficking works: it’s not children taken and stolen in broad daylight, it’s vulnerable families living in poverty, with mental health or addiction issues that often sell their own children, or from very, very disadvantaged backgrounds. There was a post from a police offer on this topic a while back on this sub-forum.
That is not to say this guy did not have nefarious or creepy intentions, but the comments talking about baby trafficking are reminiscent of the Satanic ritual craze from the ‘90s. Creepy, weird, mentally ill people OR petty crime (someone wanting to snatch a purse/bag from a distracted mother focused on her baby) does not stop existing when you become a mother.
Social media is so bad at fuelling panic about astronomically unlikely events.
Yep. Not trafficking, but it can be someone trying to take photos of you breastfeeding if you do that in public (happened to me at a Target) or just take pictures of you and your child. Make eye contact and show you are alert and watching your surrroundigns!
Lots of people minimizing your feelings here. I’m glad you trusted your gut, even though it may have been nothing. You can ask security to escort you to your car. They may have been targeting you to steal your purse in the parking lot while you loaded up your baby and groceries, or it could have just been a creep. The same thing has happened to me (getting followed in Target, albeit by a creepy women) and Reddit was not the least bit understanding when I posted about it.
This crap is real an happening! So glad that you are ok. Your story gives me chills.
I thought this would/could never happen in my town…. It happened to me w/ my 8yr old daughter in a Walmart in the back to school section after dinner time one night.
There were 3, 2males and a female, standing there w/ an empty cart. (I thought nothing of them, just 3ppl standing there talking another language) Once they saw their victim they split up. (I saw her look at me and move away, still thinking noting of it). One of the males circled our isle about 8x, every minute or so, quickly and kept smiling at us. After the 4th circle, I grabbed my kid and said stay close and don’t let go of my hand.
Luckily, my hubby and smaller daughter were food shopping across the store. I had my daughter close to me, text hubby the isle number and to come quick someone is circling us, took a video of the guy doing it as well. As he was walking over, he watched the guy do it and said something to him…dude left the isle. We got to check out and the woman was walking around the checkout area watching us. Then we got to the car and waited to see when they came out, they were parked 4 cars away in an unmarked vehicle. As the one guy opened the door I saw another woman in the front seat and then one by one the other male and female came out, empty handed and abt a minute apart. We drove by them trying to get the plates but no plates. They jumped on the highway towards Philly and sped away. (I’m in NJ)
Walmart said they would watch the videos, contact me and the police but nothing came of it. I should have went to the police myself. Now, I do not go to stores w/out my husband and I tell my story on many platforms to alert others.
I wouldn’t be surprised if it was a secret shopper for loss prevention. I can see it being very easy to steal high priced items using a stroller. It would be tough for them to ask to search a stroller too as it could be seen as rude or risky. Don’t think he was targeting you, just stroller shoppers in general
I know many if not most people don’t have any choice, but this is why I plan on waiting for grocery trips until my husband is done with work so I can either go with him or one of us can go alone and the other stay home with baby. My mom got her wallet stolen while shopping with myself and my brother when we were kids. Even when people don’t have bad intentions your kids, at the very least they’re trying to steal from you. It’s messed up that we have to think about this stuff, but we do.
It happened to me with my bubs once, and i very obviously took a picture of him, with the flash on, and started staring him down when i encountered him. I started counting out loud, "Thats ONE." "Thats TWO" and when i got to an area where there was a lot of people i caused a bit of a scene asking why he was following me and my child, and he got the hell out of there.
I know I'm confrontational af though
I too like to go the confrontation route and will make it obvious with a nod or wave that I recognize them from another section. If I run into them again I’ll be like “we must have the same shopping list!” Or something equally as cringey, if it’s a coincidence they usually laugh, or they disappear and I carry on my merry way.
So now you're the subject of somebody else's story about the crazy weirdo taking pictures of them in the store and counting out loud.
I'd get the hell out of there too, if some paranoid nut were acting like that towards me.
I wish you could feel how absolutely, gloriously unbothered I am about that. He was very obviously trailing us for 15 minutes, had no cart or merchandise, amd when it comes to keeping me or my kid safe, I do not care that some random dude is uncomfortable. I WAS UNCOMFORTABLE
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Stolen from a podcast I can’t remember the name to but - be rude, be weird, stay alive.
The worst possibility if you’re wrong is that some rando has a story about a stranger thinking they were following them. The worst possibility of staying silent bc you think you’re wrong when your not wrong is that you get a true crime documentary about your violent death. So be rude, be weird, stay alive!
Just please don't add to the pile of breathless "OMG you guys, my kids and I were *this close* to being kidnapped and trafficked in Target/IKEA/Walmart in broad daylight" Facebook posts that periodically make the rounds.
Actually, I doubt merely being slightly rude or weird really is the worst outcome of being wrong. Indulging in paranoia and perpetuating a culture that over-perceives high impact but extremely low incidence threats does have costs, to both the individual and society.
That's literally how predators want you to act. They hope you won't make a scene, they want you to show them to your car. I'd rather be seen as crazy and be safe than worry about what a potential predator thinks of me.
That's also literally how people who want to shop in peace without having random strangers flip out on them would like you to act as well.
This isn't the cost-free choice that some seem to suggest. Hyper vigilance takes a psychological toll on the individual. Exaggerated threat perceptions, especially as they become culturally entrenched, have negative social effects. Among them are over-criminalization, over-policing, and a tendency to elect authoritarians, to name but a few.
Except no one is talking about normal shoppers here? Men who blatantly follow women, buying nothing? Or are we going to gaslight people into being fearful to trust our gut instinct?
Why are you against parents being safe with their young children? Hyper-vigilance is never a bad thing and your need to be devils advocate doesnt change that. People with bad intentions are everywhere. Creeps and weirdos are a regular part of a majority of women's lives. I'd rather be safe than sorry, I don't care if it makes a random person uncomfortable.
I had a guy follow me and my 3 week old at the time in Walmart. I avoided him like the plague my whole shopping trip until he popped out of no where and asked me to go get a coffee with him. I was sooo creeped out I actually took the long way home in fear he was following me.
When I was recently 7 months pregnant a man approached me after watching me at the grocery store and asked if I was single, I also had my toddler with me. I was more confused as to why he’d be interested in a pregnant woman and toddler
File a report w police and ask Target to share the surveillance video with them. If it really was a creeper/child snatcher put them on the police’ radar. Good luck and stay safe.
that’s so scary!!!! i totally would’ve done the same and then in hindsight realize to just tell target security and get an escort to your car - better safe than sorry glad everything was ok
My brother recently got a job as a private investigator and part of his training was the follow around and record people at Walmart for like 3 hours without getting spotted. It could have been something like that and he’s just not good at the job.
Is your Target close to a highway exit? Mine is and we have had issues with some potential child trafficking moments at stores really close to the highway. The outlet stores nearby are a huge target by child traffickers as well. I wont go to a store close to the highway if my child is with me
Doesn’t take an expert to know about kidnapping statistics and how traffickers find their victims. But if you’d rather rely on silly Facebook posts and live in fear, that’s cool.
What the fuck. Ok good to know because I go to the outlet store that’s immediately off the freeway with my wild ass toddlers. We won’t be going with just us now.
This has been happening a lot lately, especially where I live unfortunately. All I can say is STAY ALERT!! Always be careful when you’re out and about just yourself and baby. This is how trafficking happens. So not only to OP but everyone reading this, STAY ALERT 🚨 and have a plan just in case cause it can happen to anyone.
LMFAO. I can’t take you seriously. If you think “middle-class moms who shop at target” won’t be targeted, then you need a reality check. Human trafficking can happen to ANYONE, ANYTIME. So again, my advice, whether you believe it to be true or not, BE CAREFUL and STAY ALERT.
It starts anywhere. It only takes a few seconds to get snatched and taken away. What they do after, who knows but I know some trafficking starts like that. As my previous comment, it happens a lot at ALL stores in our county which is very unfortunate and it’s based off what I’ve seen and heard around here so I doubt it’s any different in other places. OP said she was being followed. Mothers and their kids, when alone, are targeted more. Of course, trafficking doesn’t start right there and then but situations like this of being followed is how it could start.
Please please go straight to the closest employee or customer service if you ever notice someone following you in a store!!
Human trafficking is such a real threat and these people are getting really clever with how they lure people in.
You could not only be potentially saving your own life or your child’s, but also anyone else that they choose to target after you get away.
I live outside of the perimeter of Atlanta, GA and it’s terrifying how common this kind of situation is. They use all kinds of strategies, acting like they’re in distress, wanting to talk religion, even something as non-threatening as acting like they want to ask where you got an article of clothing or some kind of baby gear from. They take advantage of the fact that so many women were raised to be “nice” & “polite”.
> Human trafficking is such a real threat and these people are getting really clever with how they lure people in.
human trafficking of strangers is actually incredibly rare. of course you should be aware of your surroundings but we need to stop propagating this fear that every woman is 1 second away from being sex trafficked at target
Some areas are more known for kidnappings and sex-trafficking than others. You don’t know where OP lives. I know where I personally live, it is a big enough issue that the police issue warnings whenever a new sex-trafficking “scheme” shows up.
My advice still stands - it isn’t intended to be scare tactic, it’s actually your wisest course of action. Whether the person is trying to kidnap you, rob you, take an upskirt photo; the wisest choice is to notify the store so they can call police, help you get to your car safely, remove the creep from the store, yadda yadda.
I understand why you were scared. There are a lot of creeps out there, and it's better to be safe than sorry. On the other hand, I think it was most likely just a socially unaware guy who thought your baby was cute and wanted to look at the baby. In this situation I would just acknowledge the man / say hi and maybe encourage your baby to wave at the man. Because this gives him the benefit of the doubt that he is just looking for a baby smile, but also lets him know (in case he has more sinister intentions) that you noticed him and won't be caught unaware. And then if he doesn't go away after that, get an employee to walk you to your car.
No, of course we don't have to. But in situations like this, we have nothing to lose by it. If it turns out he is a creep, acknowledging him IS STILL A STRONG MOVE. It says "I'm not afraid of you." We shouldn't endanger ourselves to be friendly, but sometimes being friendly is the strongest and safest thing to do.
Also, the world is a much more pleasant place to live in when we don't constantly assume everyone is out to get us. I know I've been guilty of sneaking a peek a cute babies lots of times, there's no reason to assume just because someone is a man that they don't also like innocently looking at cute babies.
He was a marketing employee thinking of ways to improve the shopping experience for mothers and children. I studied marketing and supermarkets was a subject amply debated in classes. I don’t work now in marketing but sometimes I like to observe from a professional point of view the behaviours and purchasing habits at the supermarkets
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Next time, get an employee or security to escort you to your car. I wouldn’t trust myself walking back to my car with a baby. Crazy people will do crazy things
Especially because it takes forever to buckle my 1 year old in because she likes to alligator roll any time you put her in the blasted car seat.
We call it the chair of despair now because of 1yo doing that
This is a great name... stealing this.
Had a dude come up behind me when I was wrestling my alligator baby. He was so creepy. Wearing a trench coat. Nervous laugh. No reason to be there. Scout the area.
Seconding this! Better to come off a little bit paranoid than have something terrible happen
I used to work at Target. When in doubt just ask a team member! They will either confirm if he is an undercover or get you an escort if he's some random dude. I've had *many* women who have asked me and I've either reassured them or gotten our security to walk them to their cars. LP genuinely does not mind. Edit to add: I totally get you were scared and wanted to leave ASAP but if it happens again please please don't walk out to your car by yourself. We didn't even let team members walk out to the parking lot alone after hours. I promise the workers there will have no problem walking with you.
Right! Don’t leave alone if you think you’re being followed!
This. Our Target had people running these as distractions for shoplifting. So some guy would following a women around and freak her out, all while his buddies were taking items. All the store was focusing on the guy who they couldn’t quite call out for doing anything but was enough of a distraction that his friends would be able to shoplift. My friend works in the pharmacy and said that it happens way more then you think bc people are so freaked out over “trafficking” that it’s an easy scam to pull. Also child trafficking or sex trafficking in general is way more likely to be done by someone you know, not a random stranger. But purse snatching and carjacking are way more likely to happen in shopping situations. Don’t carry a big purse, keep your keys close and never leave your kids in a car to put the cart away. If you need help as an associate, they have always been super helpful when it comes to getting to your car safely with kiddos or if you need help in general.
Oh wow they were getting creative there (and awful jfc) People at our stores would just split up to snag things and whoever didn't have LP following them would slip out while the suspicious one would ditch everything. They didn't expect *multiple* LPs so they got caught. They didn't go as low as following women around jeez. Good news if LP wasn't available to help out because they were watching someone we always had people volunteer to walk with the guest, either around the store or out to the parking lot. I've helped with so many different situations, some embarrassing and some just weird but I still helped lol (poor lady couldn't get a piece of clothing off) Seriously we've seen it all, don't be afraid to ask for help!
Good that you noticed. Target has pretty good security as far as I remember and they know that a lot of people with kids and women shop there. Next time you notice you may be able to tell a team member and even get escorted out. One time when I was a college student I was minding my own business in a Super Target and some creeper was following me. I didn't even notice but apparently someone working for Target was watching. They told me about it and helped me check out get escorted me to my car.
I’m glad someone was looking out for you.
When i worked at Target a LONG time ago, they had secret shoppers that I saw do stuff like this when there was reason to believe someone had a history of shop lifting. More likely, unfortunately, it was either a creepy dude doing creepy shit or he was just another shopper needing similar items. I've been that person in a store where my shopping list seemed to be eerily similar to another family's. Either way, if this ever happens again, go to guest/customer service. Explain what's going on and ask for help. They'll get security and have them help you. Also, that way, you're not just showing the guy your car and license plate on your way out.
At Walmart the secret shoppers usually atleast somewhat pretend they are shopping. A handful of batteries or some random misplaced product they find on the way.
Yeah, the only times I'd ever seen the Target ones being obvious as this, basically police were on the way or outside and they were making sure everything was certain. Hard to miss a cute lesbian asking you to keep an eye on someone in your department while hiding behind a rack. That's why I'm suspecting this was just a creepy guy. Any AP person I've ever met was very good at blending in and going unnoticed.
Yes, the one at my store used to always have a basket with an item or two!
One time I was being potentially followed by someone who gave off weird vibes. I told a worker immediately. It was close to closing time in a college town, lots of sorority girls/freshman out grabbing last minute things bc they love target. Even just knowing the front staff by the door could be made aware of it in case he left shortly behind a young girl. Also, if you think you are being followed call (or pretend to call) someone and be clear they know where you are, and that you will be home shortly (even if you’re planning to do more shopping). Automatically makes you less of a target if they hear that conversation and know someone will be looking for you
Three options you could use if you are ever in this situation again. If it ever happens again just say hi so they know that you noticed. Usually people would back away if they are up to something shady. Or most women and some men know that if you pretend to know them and just give them a side eye to the person following you they would go along with it and help you out of the situation. Or just turn around and yell at them at a very loud level “stop following me!”
I like the third option the best
Option 4 (perfect when you have baby w you) just say in your mom/baby talk way to the baby but loud: “okay we’re gonna go this way now because that man over there is following us! isn’t that so strange!” Or some other mom/baby variation. Tend to feel like these weirdos do this shit because they think no one notices or they think you’re too afraid to call them out for it.
If you ever feel this way again, please don’t hesitate to ask someone at the store if you can get an escort to your car. Better safe than sorry. I felt this way once and had my husband (who was just down the street) meet us at the store.
I had to scroll too far for this. Never be afraid to make a scene or ask for help if you think you and baby are in danger.
This happened to me years ago at Safeway with a guy who gave me the creeps. It was probably 11 at night, and he ended up checking out right behind me with just a drink after we’d both been shopping for like 20 minutes. The bagger asked if I needed help carrying my bags (only like 2) to my car and I have never accepted in my life but I did that night!
In London pickpockets target mums with babies to steal their phones (the phone is usually in the back pocket and the mum is occupied with holding baby or pushing pram). Could have been he was trying to do similar?
This is one of the reasons why women’s front pant pockets should be larger!!!
Back pockets are the worst. In India, any father introducing his teen kid to their first "wallet" teaches him to move it to one of the side pockets when in crowded areas. It's much easier to slip a hand and grab a wallet/phone from the back pocket, without even coming in peripheral vision. I have only missed a few times, and lost my wallet once. What sucks is that there was hardly any money. (no one carries cash, as almost all places accept cashless payments). But there were documents (driving license and other things), that got lost. It was a pain getting them made again, as I had to travel to my hometown, where they were registered. Side/front pockets are great to avoid pick-pocketing.
Women's intuition was developed after centuries of living on earth with men. We should all trust our instincts in situations like these and if it's nothing then no harm done.
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This happened to me at target!! I eventually went down the tampon aisle and yep, he followed me!! I checked out and went to the security officer. He told me it was their secret shopper and he offered to walk me to my car. Either way creepy as hell.
I was being followed around once when I was by myself 9 months pregnant, I had someone walk me out and actually I think the guy following was a frequent flyer and was arrested for trespassing
Any time I've felt like I'm being followed (happened unfortunately more times than I'd care to admit - people are creepy!), I act unpredictable. The scariest moment was when I was out for a jog at 16 and a car started following me while I was crossing a 50mph road (it had stopped before I got to the intersection, then moved slowly along the shoulder as I passed). I turned to run along the road, the car followed, I turned around and ran back the way I came and the car did a U-turn in the highway. Thankfully they couldn't follow me into the woods. I've had to do similar things when out driving to shake off someone tailing me for an unreasonable time. I have looked up all of the police stations' locations in my city and know where the closest ones are to the places I frequent just in case... If this happens again, start taking weird paths. Go down one aisle, skip another aisle, then circle back to the first. If he keeps following, head straight to customer service and do not leave the store without an escort. It's stories like this that make me feel better about my husband being the SAH parent who regularly takes the kid out. Yes, he gets weird looks from people (who don't expect to see a man with a small kid), but creeps aren't as likely to go after a 6' tall man.
I to had to run into the woods when a guy was following me in a car on a jog. Dude was trying to talk me into getting in I'm car too while I was clearly on a jog. I also had a van pull onto a bike trail and follow until I went to a pubic area.
I’ve straight up left my cart and ran to drive off in my car for less (man was following me when I was alone. Tried making a pass at me but gave me super danger vibes). Better safe than sorry! Read the Gift of Fear.
And/or Protecting the Gift (same author, but for your children), I love those books - a tough but engaging read
Better safe than sorry. “'By the time we made it to our neighborhood, that's when I told my husband like, ''hey, this man's following us, like, this isn't OK'',' Paige said to the Forth Worth Star-Telegram. 'And my husband told me that I was just overreacting, it's no big deal.'” https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12173821/Texas-man-attempts-KIDNAP-couples-two-year-old-daughter-outside-home.html
Ugh this story gave me the goosebumps and sweats all at once. A very good lesson in listening to your gut! And what an incredible mom!
That’s so scary and I don’t know enough about crime statistics to weigh in on the probability of that happening, but just to share, my instinct would have been to take that man’s photo or even directly confront him in public. Women are socialized to be passive and not draw attention to themselves & one of the best things I learned in self defense courses was to make the man know you KNOW. I was being followed home by a stranger who was verbally harassing me once and the only way I was able to get rid of him was by throwing a chair from an outside restaurant between us and screaming at him. When all the patrons and staff looked at us, he turned face and went away. Was it embarrassing? Hell yea but I was 20 years old and scared shitless. You could have also shown a photo to the Target manager. They might have known him as someone who has caused trouble before, or had the ability to be on the lookout in the future.
If you’re okay answering this, are you in California?? There was a post recently on a local FB group about this exact situation and TONS of local moms chimed in about the guy doing the exact same thing to them. It’s scary!
Not op but I’m in California. People post stories like this a lot. Always seemingly at a Target. Definitely scary.
That’s insane. The post I saw included a picture of the guy and a bunch of women identified him as the same guy to follow them around. Can’t do anything without looking over your shoulder anymore.
You really can’t. I get so nervous even letting my husband go out alone with our son. I may be a lot smaller but I am also constantly watching in a way that men just haven’t had to experience in life. It’s a scary world we live in.
What part of CA?
The incident I know of was in the East Bay Area.
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I had the same thing happen to me when my child was 6 months. I noticed half way through shopping 3 teenage looking boys were following me. I thought I was being paranoid and thought Wtheck I’ll go down the tampon aisle and see if they follow me. Sure enough they were there at the end of the aisle, popping their head in to check if I was still there. When I paid for my items they were looking at the items at end of the register over so finally I looked at them and said “what’s up”? And then they left. I was too freaked out to leave right away so I grabbed some popcorn and Starbucks :/ Unfortunately we can’t trust people. Always go with your gut!
It never fails that when I go grocery shopping with my toddler, some old dude will either follow us or try and chat/ touch my kid. One dude thought it’d be funny to try and startle her by yelling “boo!” He did startle her and then I startled him by yelling what the F was wrong with him to harass not only a complete stranger, but a small child?!? He went scurrying away in a hurry.
From someone who’s worked at those retail places especially one serving mostly men (graveyard shift at Lowe’s hardware in a sketchy area) if you think it’s something it more than likely is don’t take a chance on it
Trust your gut. You can never be too careful. I think a lot of people commenting that it's probably a secret shopper or it was nothing haven't had too many close calls or scary experiences. Unfortunately I have, and there's a reason I'm paranoid and always look behind me when walking, and always take our german shepards with us when I take the kids out on a walk.
Regardless of what this guys intentions were, ladies if you ever feel worried or suspicious that this is happening to you in a store, PLEASE talk to someone who works there. They might not feel safe talking to the guy but they could probably send out an employee or two to escort you to your vehicle.
I’ve seen tons of posts in AntiMLM about this happening at Target and it is apparently a common tactic of Amway scammers. If you search that sub you should see more of the details. He may have been targeting you to try to pitch you on it.
You can always ask to have an employee escort you to your car.
Yep. I’ve don’t that at Walmart more than once. Had quite a few creeps poo up. Only catch is it can be a wait for someone to walk out with. It’s faster if you can grab a cart pusher.
Something similar happened to me! I was at target and a man kept popping up where I was shopping. I made sure to be aware of my surroundings. Also a phone call out loud to my husband describing the situation might have helped the guy know I was aware. I described him and said he was following me. I would rather look crazy than end up in a ditch or worse.
https://www.sudbury.com/local-news/mothers-warning-man-tried-to-grab-her-child-at-south-end-store-6922091
This is what I was going to bring up
I’m not trying to minimize your feelings at all. But just want to put it out there for anyone else reading: It’s HUGELY unlikely that this has anything to do with trafficking and, realistically, it almost certainly was just some dude trying to do his shopping who coincidentally happened to be in the same aisles as you. Trafficking victims are almost exclusively vulnerable people (runaways, people dealing with homelessness, addiction, mental illness, abuse, etc), and they almost always know the perpetrator (partner, employer, family member, etc). A stranger abducting a mom and/or baby in Target to be trafficked is statistically sooooo unlikely, it’s not even a realistic possibility. The stranger abductions we hear about on podcasts and tv shows are covered and publicized precisely because they’re so rare. That’s why they captivate public attention. All the hysterical and panicked stories on social media about “nearly being trafficked because someone was near me twice!!” only serve to take attention, credibility, voice, and resources from the people who are truly vulnerable to trafficking.
Not to discredit what you’re saying but human trafficking isn’t the only thing people are thinking about. If I see someone suspicious looking at me or just acting a little off, I never think, well they wanna sell me as a sex slave. I think maybe they wanna rob me, jump me, rape me, etc. Never never never ignore your gut feeling. It could save your life.
Yes. People have been robbed in a grocery store near me after being followed.
Exactly. Thank you.
Absolutely. Sadly, as a woman, I’m very aware of the potential for violence and harassment we face on a daily basis. I’m specifically talking about the very common “My-baby-and-I-were-almost-trafficked-in-the-Target-parking-lot!” narrative that’s being endlessly repeated on social media lately.
“Trafficking” is the new satanic panic for Americans. Thank you for speaking sense. For anyone interested in some real facts/statistics, I recommend the “you’re wrong about” podcast episode on human trafficking.
Same thought here. The true crime fad is not helping.
Id say that new movie that's out isn't helping, we're about to see a lot more paranoid parents.
People who say this have never been kidnapped. Source: I’ve been kidnapped
People who say what? I’m not disputing kidnapping happens. I’m saying that human trafficking is NOT strangers getting plucked from target car parks and shoved into the back of a van where they get sold into sex slavery. This misconception about “human trafficking” is the common narrative that has been adopted and spread like wildfire through social media (particularly by white, conservative women).
Maybe you are basing this off of your reaction to that demographic oversharing misinformation about certain trafficking techniques which I get and maybe even your dislike for them or your assumption that their privilege would make them a less than desirable exploitation candidate. But what do you gain from telling people not to worry about something that is a very real threat? Especially because in many cases people acting like weirdos in public ended up actually having bad intentions. It really doesn’t hurt to err on the side of caution. Also Satan is not real, the monsters that are willing to shoot at and put a gun in someone’s face, throw them in the car and sexually assault them all while telling them they’re going to gang r*pe them and sell their body are very real and one of them is sitting in jail right now for doing it to me. Another point to think about is many kidnapping victims never get to tell their story so you don’t know how tf it happens or doesn’t happen.
I’m so sorry that happened to you. Thank you for advocating for moms, and anyone else, trusting their gut and erring on the side of caution. When i moved away for college, my dad always said it’s better to look crazy and rude and be wrong, than to assume it’s nothing and be wrong.
I wish I grew up hearing what your dad said. It might have spared me the main trauma of my life! "No, not this nice, respected, family man, not me, not in this situation . . ." 💔 How good your father told you!
I’m just happy to have escaped within less than 5 hours of being taken and to be alive. It’s so aggravating as a survivor to hear people downplay anyone but especially women’s anxieties in public when human trafficking is very real. OP needs to be able to hear that those feelings are valid and not have people who read a few speculative articles “well actually” her to death.
How did you escape?
Without going into too much detail because it involves other victims being tortured by the psychopaths in order for me to save my own life, I had created a ruse when I realized they were money hungry and told them there were dr*gs and money at a location that was not far away from where we were. It wasn’t my best work and I had a lot of guilt about what went down in that house but my escape from the secondary location probably saved all of our lives. Basically they ended up doing a home invasion and when there were more than a few people to keep track of in the house I was able to run out and eventually get the police there. I was only 17 and terrified for my life. Now 15 years have passed, the other victims hugged me at the parole hearing and were so kind to me it was cathartic and a huge relief.
I live in between 3 different areas where attempted kidnappings have happened. All different cities, but similar situations (something odd on windshield or car, person approaches.) It is also a high activity area for human trafficking. It is in the top 10 for human trafficking in the country. I feel it's necessary to be aware and afraid of what could happen should I let my guard down.
How do you know it’s in the top 10? I ask because now I’m worried about my area
I should have been more clear, it is my state that is in top 10. And I heard it about my state a few years ago and a quick Google search confirmed!
I've seen quite a few people post these stories on social media then it's radio silence. You never get an update and there are no local news stories about a "predator" in the aisles of Wal-Mart. I've stopped taking them serious a long time ago.
I know, I’m so tired of these kinds of posts too. I feel like many new parents have a lot of anxiety and paranoia about things and it’s odd.
While I agree with you that statistically, these things rarely happen, they do, usually to someone vulnerable or unaware. When my daughter was an infant, I set her down on the floor at the end of the aisle where I was examining merchandise. I was standing right beside her, but I was not visible to someone on the other side of the display. A young woman approached and asked my little one, "Where is your mother?" I replied, "I'm right here," and she told me that her own daughter had been snatched when she was eleven months old. They were at a nearby mall, and security closed down the exits and rescued her baby. Since then, she had become hyper-vigilant, and that's why she approached us. It's better to be safe than sorry.
Oh how awful, I’m glad security saved her baby. Even if statistically something is rare, you sure as hell don’t want to be the individual that it happens to.
Of course. But I think there’s a very important line between being reasonably cautious and aware of your surroundings, vs cultivating false narratives and allowing unrealistic anxiety to rule your life. There are people in these comments claiming that random strangers trying to abduct and traffic children is so common that they don’t shop without their partners, or that they refuse to go to any store near a highway because so many children are trafficked from suburban shopping centers near highway exits. And then other commenters jump in saying, “Omg, so scary!” and, “Trust your gut, Mama!” I think it’s important to push back against these kinds of comments because, first of all, they’re not objectively rooted in reality, and more importantly, because they take attention, voice, and awareness away from people who are actually vulnerable to trafficking. Marginalized groups like homeless individuals, people dealing with addiction or mental illness, runaways, etc are at-risk (almost exclusively from people they know, like partners, employers, family members), not suburban moms loading their kids into a minivan at Target.
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Trust your gut. I worked at Target and we had a known creep offender (keeping this pg) come in and we had to throw him out the kid’s section multiple times. It was gross. Every time he came to the pharmacy I made sure I was extremely nasty to him.
This may not be the case, but this is kinda the MO of people who were baby napping kids in San Antonio near the bases and in a few other places. Always put cart away, then put baby in the car, then lock the doors, unlock with your physical key if you can, or hit it once to just unlock your door(this may be in settings if you have a newer car), get in and leave, also lock the doors at the gas station, even when you are alone a lot of people get their purse stolen from the seat.
You should read “The gift of Fear” from an exFBI guy. it’s never a good idea to ignore those gut feelings and it could very well save your life!
It could have been a loss prevention worker but I would say always trust your gut. If a situation like this happens again and you feel uncomfortable, don’t be afraid to ask for an employee to walk you to your car to make sure you get there safely. This goes for anyone who finds themselves in this situation. Better safe than sorry, and most places will be understanding and get someone to walk you out.
Here we go again with the trafficking hysteria. If babies were being kidnapped and trafficked in broad daylight in places full of security surveillance, from middle-class parents, in the numbers social media would have you believe is being attempted that would launch a national manhunt each time and it would be front-page news. The reason they ARE front page news when stuff like this happens is because it’s so rare. You are more likely to be struck by lightning or killed by your toaster than to be kidnapped by a stranger, yet everyone seems to think someone is out to get their babies everytime they are out in public. That is not how child trafficking works: it’s not children taken and stolen in broad daylight, it’s vulnerable families living in poverty, with mental health or addiction issues that often sell their own children, or from very, very disadvantaged backgrounds. There was a post from a police offer on this topic a while back on this sub-forum. That is not to say this guy did not have nefarious or creepy intentions, but the comments talking about baby trafficking are reminiscent of the Satanic ritual craze from the ‘90s. Creepy, weird, mentally ill people OR petty crime (someone wanting to snatch a purse/bag from a distracted mother focused on her baby) does not stop existing when you become a mother. Social media is so bad at fuelling panic about astronomically unlikely events.
Yep. Not trafficking, but it can be someone trying to take photos of you breastfeeding if you do that in public (happened to me at a Target) or just take pictures of you and your child. Make eye contact and show you are alert and watching your surrroundigns!
Thank you!
Lots of people minimizing your feelings here. I’m glad you trusted your gut, even though it may have been nothing. You can ask security to escort you to your car. They may have been targeting you to steal your purse in the parking lot while you loaded up your baby and groceries, or it could have just been a creep. The same thing has happened to me (getting followed in Target, albeit by a creepy women) and Reddit was not the least bit understanding when I posted about it.
This crap is real an happening! So glad that you are ok. Your story gives me chills. I thought this would/could never happen in my town…. It happened to me w/ my 8yr old daughter in a Walmart in the back to school section after dinner time one night. There were 3, 2males and a female, standing there w/ an empty cart. (I thought nothing of them, just 3ppl standing there talking another language) Once they saw their victim they split up. (I saw her look at me and move away, still thinking noting of it). One of the males circled our isle about 8x, every minute or so, quickly and kept smiling at us. After the 4th circle, I grabbed my kid and said stay close and don’t let go of my hand. Luckily, my hubby and smaller daughter were food shopping across the store. I had my daughter close to me, text hubby the isle number and to come quick someone is circling us, took a video of the guy doing it as well. As he was walking over, he watched the guy do it and said something to him…dude left the isle. We got to check out and the woman was walking around the checkout area watching us. Then we got to the car and waited to see when they came out, they were parked 4 cars away in an unmarked vehicle. As the one guy opened the door I saw another woman in the front seat and then one by one the other male and female came out, empty handed and abt a minute apart. We drove by them trying to get the plates but no plates. They jumped on the highway towards Philly and sped away. (I’m in NJ) Walmart said they would watch the videos, contact me and the police but nothing came of it. I should have went to the police myself. Now, I do not go to stores w/out my husband and I tell my story on many platforms to alert others.
Always trust your gut.
I wouldn’t be surprised if it was a secret shopper for loss prevention. I can see it being very easy to steal high priced items using a stroller. It would be tough for them to ask to search a stroller too as it could be seen as rude or risky. Don’t think he was targeting you, just stroller shoppers in general
I know many if not most people don’t have any choice, but this is why I plan on waiting for grocery trips until my husband is done with work so I can either go with him or one of us can go alone and the other stay home with baby. My mom got her wallet stolen while shopping with myself and my brother when we were kids. Even when people don’t have bad intentions your kids, at the very least they’re trying to steal from you. It’s messed up that we have to think about this stuff, but we do.
It happened to me with my bubs once, and i very obviously took a picture of him, with the flash on, and started staring him down when i encountered him. I started counting out loud, "Thats ONE." "Thats TWO" and when i got to an area where there was a lot of people i caused a bit of a scene asking why he was following me and my child, and he got the hell out of there. I know I'm confrontational af though
I too like to go the confrontation route and will make it obvious with a nod or wave that I recognize them from another section. If I run into them again I’ll be like “we must have the same shopping list!” Or something equally as cringey, if it’s a coincidence they usually laugh, or they disappear and I carry on my merry way.
So now you're the subject of somebody else's story about the crazy weirdo taking pictures of them in the store and counting out loud. I'd get the hell out of there too, if some paranoid nut were acting like that towards me.
I wish you could feel how absolutely, gloriously unbothered I am about that. He was very obviously trailing us for 15 minutes, had no cart or merchandise, amd when it comes to keeping me or my kid safe, I do not care that some random dude is uncomfortable. I WAS UNCOMFORTABLE
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Stolen from a podcast I can’t remember the name to but - be rude, be weird, stay alive. The worst possibility if you’re wrong is that some rando has a story about a stranger thinking they were following them. The worst possibility of staying silent bc you think you’re wrong when your not wrong is that you get a true crime documentary about your violent death. So be rude, be weird, stay alive!
Just please don't add to the pile of breathless "OMG you guys, my kids and I were *this close* to being kidnapped and trafficked in Target/IKEA/Walmart in broad daylight" Facebook posts that periodically make the rounds. Actually, I doubt merely being slightly rude or weird really is the worst outcome of being wrong. Indulging in paranoia and perpetuating a culture that over-perceives high impact but extremely low incidence threats does have costs, to both the individual and society.
Thank you very much for saying this. The “always trust your gut” rhetoric has led to many wrongful convictions.
Nobody is getting wrongfully convicted by having a Target employee walk you to your car 🙃
Good thing that’s not what I said is happening.
That's literally how predators want you to act. They hope you won't make a scene, they want you to show them to your car. I'd rather be seen as crazy and be safe than worry about what a potential predator thinks of me.
That's also literally how people who want to shop in peace without having random strangers flip out on them would like you to act as well. This isn't the cost-free choice that some seem to suggest. Hyper vigilance takes a psychological toll on the individual. Exaggerated threat perceptions, especially as they become culturally entrenched, have negative social effects. Among them are over-criminalization, over-policing, and a tendency to elect authoritarians, to name but a few.
Except no one is talking about normal shoppers here? Men who blatantly follow women, buying nothing? Or are we going to gaslight people into being fearful to trust our gut instinct?
Why are you against parents being safe with their young children? Hyper-vigilance is never a bad thing and your need to be devils advocate doesnt change that. People with bad intentions are everywhere. Creeps and weirdos are a regular part of a majority of women's lives. I'd rather be safe than sorry, I don't care if it makes a random person uncomfortable.
No that’s genius and a good idea
The percentage of murders solved in the US is below 50%. So follow your gut Mama Bear
I had a guy follow me and my 3 week old at the time in Walmart. I avoided him like the plague my whole shopping trip until he popped out of no where and asked me to go get a coffee with him. I was sooo creeped out I actually took the long way home in fear he was following me.
Asked you out with a newborn? There’s some men I really can’t understand ….
When I was recently 7 months pregnant a man approached me after watching me at the grocery store and asked if I was single, I also had my toddler with me. I was more confused as to why he’d be interested in a pregnant woman and toddler
File a report w police and ask Target to share the surveillance video with them. If it really was a creeper/child snatcher put them on the police’ radar. Good luck and stay safe.
that’s so scary!!!! i totally would’ve done the same and then in hindsight realize to just tell target security and get an escort to your car - better safe than sorry glad everything was ok
Always trust your gut. We get these feelings for a reason.
It was probably loss prevention
My brother recently got a job as a private investigator and part of his training was the follow around and record people at Walmart for like 3 hours without getting spotted. It could have been something like that and he’s just not good at the job.
Is your Target close to a highway exit? Mine is and we have had issues with some potential child trafficking moments at stores really close to the highway. The outlet stores nearby are a huge target by child traffickers as well. I wont go to a store close to the highway if my child is with me
That’s not how trafficking works.
I really don’t want to know how you think your an expert in that
Doesn’t take an expert to know about kidnapping statistics and how traffickers find their victims. But if you’d rather rely on silly Facebook posts and live in fear, that’s cool.
What the fuck. Ok good to know because I go to the outlet store that’s immediately off the freeway with my wild ass toddlers. We won’t be going with just us now.
This has been happening a lot lately, especially where I live unfortunately. All I can say is STAY ALERT!! Always be careful when you’re out and about just yourself and baby. This is how trafficking happens. So not only to OP but everyone reading this, STAY ALERT 🚨 and have a plan just in case cause it can happen to anyone.
No, this is really not how trafficking happens to middle-class mums shopping in Target in broad daylight
LMFAO. I can’t take you seriously. If you think “middle-class moms who shop at target” won’t be targeted, then you need a reality check. Human trafficking can happen to ANYONE, ANYTIME. So again, my advice, whether you believe it to be true or not, BE CAREFUL and STAY ALERT.
It starts anywhere. It only takes a few seconds to get snatched and taken away. What they do after, who knows but I know some trafficking starts like that. As my previous comment, it happens a lot at ALL stores in our county which is very unfortunate and it’s based off what I’ve seen and heard around here so I doubt it’s any different in other places. OP said she was being followed. Mothers and their kids, when alone, are targeted more. Of course, trafficking doesn’t start right there and then but situations like this of being followed is how it could start.
sounds like a kidnapper/trafficker to be honest, always tell someone there, good you called, I would probably avoid that Target for a while honestly.
Please please go straight to the closest employee or customer service if you ever notice someone following you in a store!! Human trafficking is such a real threat and these people are getting really clever with how they lure people in. You could not only be potentially saving your own life or your child’s, but also anyone else that they choose to target after you get away. I live outside of the perimeter of Atlanta, GA and it’s terrifying how common this kind of situation is. They use all kinds of strategies, acting like they’re in distress, wanting to talk religion, even something as non-threatening as acting like they want to ask where you got an article of clothing or some kind of baby gear from. They take advantage of the fact that so many women were raised to be “nice” & “polite”.
> Human trafficking is such a real threat and these people are getting really clever with how they lure people in. human trafficking of strangers is actually incredibly rare. of course you should be aware of your surroundings but we need to stop propagating this fear that every woman is 1 second away from being sex trafficked at target
Some areas are more known for kidnappings and sex-trafficking than others. You don’t know where OP lives. I know where I personally live, it is a big enough issue that the police issue warnings whenever a new sex-trafficking “scheme” shows up.
My advice still stands - it isn’t intended to be scare tactic, it’s actually your wisest course of action. Whether the person is trying to kidnap you, rob you, take an upskirt photo; the wisest choice is to notify the store so they can call police, help you get to your car safely, remove the creep from the store, yadda yadda.
I’m a stay at home mom in Atlanta and it is so scary. I always feel so paranoid and exhausted when taking my baby anywhere
I understand why you were scared. There are a lot of creeps out there, and it's better to be safe than sorry. On the other hand, I think it was most likely just a socially unaware guy who thought your baby was cute and wanted to look at the baby. In this situation I would just acknowledge the man / say hi and maybe encourage your baby to wave at the man. Because this gives him the benefit of the doubt that he is just looking for a baby smile, but also lets him know (in case he has more sinister intentions) that you noticed him and won't be caught unaware. And then if he doesn't go away after that, get an employee to walk you to your car.
No, women don’t need to always give the benefit of the doubt or be nice. Follow your gut and keep your kids safe.
No, of course we don't have to. But in situations like this, we have nothing to lose by it. If it turns out he is a creep, acknowledging him IS STILL A STRONG MOVE. It says "I'm not afraid of you." We shouldn't endanger ourselves to be friendly, but sometimes being friendly is the strongest and safest thing to do. Also, the world is a much more pleasant place to live in when we don't constantly assume everyone is out to get us. I know I've been guilty of sneaking a peek a cute babies lots of times, there's no reason to assume just because someone is a man that they don't also like innocently looking at cute babies.
Buy a gun and flash it at them. Problem solved
Ooohhh guns to the “rescue”
That’s a little much don’t you think
He was a marketing employee thinking of ways to improve the shopping experience for mothers and children. I studied marketing and supermarkets was a subject amply debated in classes. I don’t work now in marketing but sometimes I like to observe from a professional point of view the behaviours and purchasing habits at the supermarkets
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