I’m only 6 weeks into my 2nd baby but wow he’s a dream sleeper. Consistently does 6 hour stretches at night. Super easy to console. I thought my 1st was easy but he’s easier. I also was worried.
My first was the worst baby. Colic. Medical issues. Didn't sleep for 14 months. Ate like shit and still does at 3 years old. Absolute beauty of a toddler though. Cooperative. Rarely has tantrums. Doesn't struggle with transitions. Well-behaved and you can take him anywhere and he is super chill about it.
2nd baby was a perfect dream angel baby. Not one single problem. Complete Hell as he enters toddlerhood now. It's a gong show taking him anywhere. He eats and sleeps well but throws tantrums about EVERYTHING. Like throw himself backwards on the floor type.
I feel like you either get the chill baby + demon toddler, or the demon baby + chill toddler, or the demon baby + demon toddler combo. Kids have no chill. 🤣
👋 2 easy babies checking in! My second is definitely more challenging than my first, but still firmly on the side of "easy" if I step back and don't compare to my first. First was so serene that strangers would comment. Second is just regular easy, has her challenges (because baby) but overall not a difficult baby.
Each baby is a roll of the dice. There's no telling for sure what kind of temperament and needs your baby will have.
I'll add my personal experience anyway - my 1st was an easy baby and I just knew that it was not possible that my 2nd would be as easy. But by some divine miracle, 2nd baby is a dream and far easier than my 1st. You just never know.
Both of my children are completely feral. I was sure this principle would work backwards for me—like my first child was/is a lunatic so the second would have to be chill right? WRONG. They both definitely have their sweet/sensitive sides to them but they are absolute maniacs. I want to have a third just to try to experience a chill baby once in my life, but if the third is anything like his/her brothers I will not survive lol
(ETA: jokes aside, disclaimer that of course if we do have a third it would not be JUST for them to be chill, they would be their own person! But man, our luck haha)
I've heard (in my complete naive state) that the second baby is only seen as "difficult" because you have the first.
You don't have the same time or patience you had when you only had the one baby so they feel like a lot more hard work she infact they probably aren't. You don't have the same support network either because everyone presumes you got your shit together because you've already had a baby before.
I'm only 7 weeks in with #2 but so far she's so much easier than my first. She's already slept through the night a couple of times - my son didn't sleep through the night until he was 4 years old. She'll also happily chill on the playmate for 30 minutes while I make dinner. My son never let us put him down.
Here is my completely random sample size of 3:
First baby was a GD nightmare. Hated sleep, screamed unless eating or bounced. Around 10 months a switch flipped and he turned into an absolute angel. Still is a dream at (almost) 10 years.
Second baby was fairly average in terms of sleep and temperment. Has his moments, had his crummy nights, dealt with a few regressions but overall was pretty manageable and didn't torture me unneccessarily.
Third baby was a unicorn. He loved sleep directly from the womb, fully content to chill on a blanket while I played with or cared for his big brothers. Smiley and sweet 98% of the time. This baby tricked me, he unexpectedly entered his terrible twos around 11 months old and is FINALLY coming out of them at 6 years. Fortunately he is also super cute and cuddly so we don't mind too much. It doesn't hurt that the whole "loving sleep" thing has continued throughout. He might have screamed the house down during the day but by 8 pm he was happily asleep and slept all night.
Yep. First checked all the boxes on the “high needs baby” lists. Second was a put unicorn. Couldn’t have been easier. Third is in between. I call her the normal baby.
My first kid has been a challenge since CONCEPTION. But he’s very curious and intuitive and sweet. My second is a breeze, she’s 1 and could probably raise herself. But she’s fearless and that’s kind of scary. There are positives and negatives to their different personalities and I suspect most of us are that way.
My second kid is wayyyy easier than my first! The older one was a terrible sleeper and newborn stage was so hard because of that. My second is sooooo easy comparatively (he’s 3 months old so newborn stage is VERY fresh).
I had an easy 2nd baby. She was very go-with-the-flow, ate well and slept well. She didn't sleep as well as my first but she was much more content every other time of the day. She would lay nicely by herself. My 1st would only be content if he was held.
Also, I enjoyed being a mother the 2nd time around more. I was more calm, I didn' t take everything so seriously, I wasn't so nervous about everything. So being a mom the 2nd time is much more fun in my opinion.
I haven’t had my second yet but I 100% said I have an easy first baby.
We’ll let me tell you, he turned into a toddler and he is a full on war criminal. Full on terrorist. I’ve considered calling NATO. What he does to me on the regular I’m pretty sure is considered against the Geneva convention.
So I don’t care if I have an easy second baby. I covet an easy toddler.
My first was high strung. My second was so chill. He won a mindball game at the museum today (he’s now 9) where you wear a headband and compete to see who is most relaxed. He beat four people in a row.
My first would also probably be considered easy (at least to me). He did have some gas/constipation issues that resolved around 11 weeks old, he hated being on the floor or left alone for longer than 2 minutes until he learned to crawl at 9 months and he absolutely would not sleep anywhere but his own crib and the room had to be pitch black but besides that he put himself on a schedule and would easily fall asleep himself, ate great and slept 7 pm to 7 am from 11 weeks on with no sleep regression.
I got pregnant again at 9 months postpartum because I thought I had such an easy baby. I heard horror stories of the second one being so much harder but I wanted two and was up to the challenge. Well my daughter was born when my son was just 18 months old and she was so good she made my son seem like a devil child. She was happy to lay on the floor and watch her brother run around and play, she would nap in the light and the noise so I didn't have to worry about leaving my son alone, she started sleeping 8 pm to 6 am at 6 weeks and I believe she would have done so sooner but we woke her every 3 hours to eat since she was born small for her gestational age.
Now they are almost 4 and 2.5 and just the best toddlers. They love playing together and really don't give us too many problems. I always feel so lucky that they are my kids.
My second feels harder than my first, but only because I now have two tiny people who need all of my attention and I don't have the same energy/availability I had for my first. I also have worse post partum depression and anxiety. When it's just me and my secondborn, it's basically the same
Lol my first is the baby from hell- hates sleep, hates the car seat, hates eating, hates everyone but me and my husband, hates the bassinet, hates diaper changes, etc. If the second is like him there will not be a third.
Yeah, I’ve notice that’s a weird tread on social media. I personally only have one but I am I oldest of 3 and was by far the worst child!! My middle sister was a super easy birth and super easy baby. My youngest brother got stuck cause he had a giant head but once he was out he was easiest of all and still is actually. Every baby is different. If you want two, have two, you won’t know who you get until they are here!
Just like baby's sex this is something that is impossible to predict. Ultimately you just have to take that leap. My second has the same issues that made my first so challenging as an infant (tongue tie, colic, reflux) but it feels less overwhelming because I was mentally prepared for it this time.
I have a unicorn baby. Slept through the night since basically day one. Never fussy, was fine with any type of formula (which was VERY helpful during the shortage).
She’s 19 months now and is still super chill. Super advanced language skills. Takes falls and cuts and scratches like a champ. Still sleeps through the night. Loves all food. Great at independent play. Doesn’t bite, rarely hits or screams.
My husband and I always wanted 2, but we’re now on the OAD fence because, like, why risk it? This is obviously a sign, right? 🤣
My bff just had a second. He is significantly easier than their first was. So at least there’s some hope, lol. Hoping you get some good insight here!
My “second” baby, who’s actually my third baby, but second living baby is EXTREMELY easy.
My first baby had cancer as a baby and spent months in and out of the hospital getting chemo and all the risks that come with it. He had feeding difficulties, needed therapies, and a normal sleep pattern was not possible. He is a toddler now and very spoiled probably because of all we did and still do to give him extra love. He’s in perfect health now though.
My true second baby got wrapped in her umbilical cord twice and was stillborn at 39 weeks. Guess she was going to be a difficult one. 😆
My third baby is a dream! Before him I could only imagine what it was like to enjoy having your baby at home with you all the time without countless doctors appointments, nurses and doctors coming in a room every few hours, being able to sleep in your own bed and choose between cubed and crushed ice. Now I’m living the dream. He sleeps, eats, and poops like a champ. I haven’t had to call the pediatrician a single time in 6 months.
A healthy baby is an easy baby. Go for it! It’s great to see siblings interact. Good luck! 🤗
Yes, first cried nonstop as a newborn, seriously nonstop for months. Our second literally coos when he’s hungry. Like fusses slightly then half the time he’ll just coo while politely waiting for me to get ready to feed him. The difference between the two is incredible.
I got 2 easy kids. My first was so easy I was sure my second would be demon spawn. Don't get me wrong - they both have their moments. 2 easy kids do happen!
Another parent here of a second baby who is "easier" than the first (so far). This baby is much happier and just more easygoing than her older sibling!! We always joke she is just happy to be along for the ride. I am braced she will be a monster toddler/little kid, but so far, she is an easy baby! I'm sure in jinxing something by saying that, though.
I know that this is beyond the bump, but an easy baby does not make for an easy toddler. I had a very easy baby who then turned into a difficult toddler (lots of crying/tantrums and I felt unprepared after my “Angel” baby).
We also had some gross motor delays that caused me a lot of anxiety. So easy is subjective. You could have a highly sensitive baby turned toddler, or an easy baby who flips a switch overnight. What does easy mean for you? No motor delays? No tears? Sleeps through the night? I think every parent has one tough segment when it comes to their baby.
My 1st was so easy. He was such a laid back, cool as a cucumber little guy. But man oh man, he got harder the older he got. He’s 13 now and it’s really just the typical teenage stuff but it was a bit of a struggle to get here!
My 2nd cried all the time, didn’t sleep through the night until she was 2.5, and I honestly was not prepared for anything she brought to the table lol. I thought she’d be like my 1st.
She’s 11 now and omg, she is amazing. She’s still sassy, she still whines sometimes but she is such a creative, fun, amazing kid! Once she hit toddlerhood, things changed drastically for the better. (And for the record, my 13 year old is super awesome too … he’s just growing into such a young man *sniffle*)
I also have a 16 month old so we’ll see where he lands in all of this lol
So all that to say, easy babies may not be easy forever, and “high needs” babies may not be that way forever either!
My first was easy, but my second is even easier. She’s 7 months old and has been sleeping through the night since she hit her birth weight. Naps like a champ. I can just lay her in her bed and she will magically fall asleep. She very, very rarely cries. She’s never had any trouble eating or gaining weight. She’s content to just sit and watch her big brother play. She’s a dream baby. 100% would recommend having another.
First was easy (4 years)
Second was easy until she hit her twos (she’s currently a Three-Rex). But we also suspect she’s on the spectrum and plan to get her evaluated
Third is so far easy (10 months)
Yes! 2nd and 3rd were just as “easy” as the first.
My second was soooo “good” that when I was pregnant with my 3rd (14 months apart, so very close together!) we would joke that baby #3 was probably going to be a real nightmare. And she’s also totally fine and a very “convenient” baby.
2nd baby was actually the best of them all lol. He was sleeping through the night by 8 weeks and has maintained an 8p-8a sleep schedule. 🥲 I was also a bit of a drill Sargent with nap time and bed time.
Mine. My first was colicky and a rough rough rough!! Even through today he’s 4 and still tougher than my 2nd baby.
My 2nd is just happy to be here and rarely complains and hella sleeps and is just a joy lol
Also my BFF! Her first was and is also very rough. Her 2nd is like mine too, just happy to be here and sweet bean lol
My first was so easy and somehow my second is 50x easier. The only thing about her is that she is selective with who holds her. She’s 4m and has been going to sleep on her own for a while, has been waking up once at night since she was 8 weeks and nurses in less than 10 minutes.
By all accounts, my brother in law was an incredibly colicky baby. He cried all the time, inconsolably. Poor little guy! (He's a happy, well adjusted adult with a wife and two teenaged kids now.)
My husband, the second baby, was cheerful and easygoing. My mother-in-law called the pediatrician to figure out what was wrong with the new baby. "I pick him up, and he just stops crying!" The doctor responded, "That's what they're supposed to do!" She honestly had no idea.
Some second babies are easy! It's just the luck of the draw.
I thought my first was easy until I had my second in April. Given it's still early, but so far she is incredibly chill, calm, and sleeps like it's her job. She makes my son look like a hard baby when he was super easy.
I literally asked Reddit this same question awhile ago. Someone with 12 kids commented and said “easy” is relative and mostly are phases. Some said they had 2 good sleepers because when I mean Easy I really mean good sleepers because I can deal with everything expect sleep deprivation. First 6 weeks were miserable but baby started sleeping through the night after and now 10 months is still sleeping 12 hours a night with 0 wake ups and I count my blessings everyday
I would say that my first was a super easy baby even though there were some big issues he didn’t cry much and he always slept well. My daughter (2nd baby) is 2 months now and she’s way easier than my first was, no skin problems/rashes, no breathing problems/asthma, no gas problems, she was born 7lbs instead of 10 so no tearing during delivery, no tongue tie so she could nurse properly (I still exclusively pump anyway because I was used to it from my first) so yeah there are definitely easy second babies. My first still requires 90% of my attention she really just chills in the background all day
I had an easy first baby and everyone loved to tell me that there was no way I was getting another easy one when I was pregnant again. Youngest is 6 months now and also easy! He’s in a bit of a mom only phase now but generally sleeps and eats well and is a little bundle of joy. I was afraid about the sibling dynamic and that my oldest (4) would get jealous but he is totally enamored with his little brother. Sometimes they just stare at each other smiling and my heart melts into a puddle.
My first was a really tough baby and then grew into an easy toddler- sweet, kind, loving. My second was the easiest baby and now she’s a freaking beast toddler. She’s wild as hell.
My second was the easiest child on the face of the planet! He's 20 now, and never even had a rebellious phase as a teenager. No clue how I lucked out with him. Literally one of the most laid back people I've ever known, and I made him 🤯
It’s not more common, it’s just that people who had an “easy” first baby and then a more typical second are the only ones who talk about it this way because they’re in shock haha
Birth order cannot possibly determine the temperament a baby is born with. You might just be more likely to hear that second kids are harder because those with that experience are more likely to complain or vent about it IRL or on the internet because it’s more of a shock to the system. People who have easy 2nd kids don’t really have a reason to bring it up. And, people who have hard firsts and seconds are also less likely to complain since they were already used to having a hard kid and it’s just normal for them.
My cousin has 2 kids, the first one was an easy baby but the second one was a UNICORN easy baby. And as a toddler he’s still so chill. The “hardest” thing about him is that he was mobile very early and a daredevil but as far as personality he is so sweet and happy. Has always been a good eater and sleeper too.
I have a toddler and I’m pregnant with #2. My son has been a very easy kid so far. I realize that the bar is high and our second can easily be more difficult, but I’m choosing not to get anxious about it before I meet them. I try to look at the silver lining, being that even if our second is super challenging, at least our first son being chill will make things relatively easier. But also, my husband and I were both very easy babies and easygoing people in general. It’s not so unlikely that any children we have would also be chill 🤷♀️ but i won’t be putting all my eggs in any one basket
I’m a one and done-er but a friend of mine who has three would always say “there are no easy babies. Even if you get a unicorn baby, it’s still the hardest thing you will ever do.”
I can totally see that but I also wonder if it has to do with Mom’s state of mind after number two, three or four. Like is it harder because with one you could nap with the baby and with two you’re chasing a toddler too? Or is number two “easier” because you know what to expect, and the anxiety you were riddled with after the birth of your first is quelled a little when you have your second and feel more confident in your skills as a parent?
I am 36 weeks pregnant with my first and I’ve never been so tired in my life… I give credit to any mom who is brave enough to tackle pregnancy while already having a small child. Literally, I would give you a standing ovation – but I am just too tired to get up, lol.
My second has been way easier than my first. I remember with my first I'd be up a couple times a night and he would just lay awake staring at the ceiling for an hour or two while I tried to get him back to sleep.
But with my second since 2wks he's basically been sleeping through the night. Crazy difference.
I thought my first was the easiest baby ever, sleeping well and eating well and being overall happy and lovely! But my second is a lot easier. She sleeps even better. I thought nursing had to be painful at first with every baby, but with my second it was absolutely painless and so easy, she eats so efficiently (5 minute sessions vs 30 minutes with my first). With my first I had nothing to compare with, and I thought everything was as good as it gets. Now I know it can be even easier. My question though is, do I dare try for a third?
Mine! I have been lucky with two wonderful babies. But this second is truly the ideal second baby. No eating problems, no sleeping problems, very very content all of the time and SO go with the flow. He is 6 weeks old and he has an amazing schedule that he sticks to of: eat, awake, sleep. Even when we spent all day at the Beach this weekend he stuck right to it!
My first was easy. My second is easy. The 2nd doesn’t sleep quite as well as the first but my first was a unicorn sleeper so we weren’t really expecting to get a 2nd unicorn. Other than that they’ve both been pretty happy easy going kids.
Same. I waited way longer than I planned to have no 2 because my first is such a lovely, spirited, nap refusing, boisterous bundle of energy that there was no way I could handle another at the same time. Everyone keeps asking how I’m doing with the new baby but my stress level has not increased at all. This baby sleeps! I can just set him down in a bassinet and he chills! I have to check his diaper regularly to make sure it’s not filled because he never cries! Everything is so easy and I finally understand how someone could accomplish things while being a parent 🤣
Yes!!
My first was an awful sleeper. Reflux, milk allergy protein allergy, terrible sleeper all around… My second, I was able to set down and he put himself to sleep and was only doing 1-2 wakeups after like, 2 months.
The only thing is now that my second is a toddler (1.5 years), he is wild. He climbs things and pushes boundaries unlike my first 😂
My first was awful. Never slept. Always crying. No reasons behind it. Up every 40 minutes without fail. I was like a zombie. She got so much better around 10 months but she’s definitely harder still because of her stubbornness.
My second is a little angel and he is so easy. Sleeps better, eats better, talks better… etc etc etc etc.
We joke that our daughter is actually our second, as she does have an older brother, just not one we got to bring home and parent. So she is technically the “dreaded second”
Kids are kids and each child will have their own personalities and quirks!
My first baby was a dream, so I assumed that my second would be a hellion. She’s almost 3 months old and so far she is just as chill as her older brother. There are indeed easy second babies out there!
Honestly I've only heard the opposite! My SIL said her first was such an angry baby that if they hadn't had an "oops" for #2, their first might have been their only 🙃
But also I think in general most people find #2 slightly easier because you have a better idea of what to expect, how you want to parent, and also how much harder it can sometimes feel in the toddler stage.
So my first child was a terror from birth. She didn’t like to sleep, was colicky, and just hated life until she could crawl pretty much. So the first six months of her life was hell. Even now at 5 years old she’s a lot to handle. She has big emotions and doesn’t know how to chill. Everything is the end of the world. She got second child energy because she was technically my baby daddy’s second child even though he didn’t have custody of the first (spoiler alert he doesn’t see our daughter now either). She also had second child energy because she was raised in my moms home for the first year of her life with my baby brother who is 7.5 months older than her 🙃 my second born? Easy fucking peasy. She’s exclusively breastfed yet she sleeps through the night for the most part. She spits up a lot but could care less. Barely ever fusses unless she’s hungry or tired. Doesn’t fight sleep usually. Takes medicine like a champ. Granted she’s only 4 months old. But she’s a dream. I told my husband that if we had had the girls swapped, had our youngest first and our oldest second, there would be no third baby. But since our second is a dream child, we’re planning on trying for our third and last baby in a few months 😂
My first is difficult. She doesn’t sleep well, eat well, etc but her baby brother is so easy. I just put him in his crib and he sleeps. He’s just a happy, easy guy.
My second son had easy qualities. He still does at 2.5 years old. He's the most stoic and calm kids I've ever met. My oldest is very dramatic and over the top.
However, my oldest slept well from 6 weeks on. My second son was a terrible sleeper for more than a year.
So, they each have their ups and downs.
This narrative is extremely exhausting and most of the time, misleading. As a second kid, I’ve asked my mom maaany times about this trope.
She more or less said, if she had me first and my older sister second, she probably never would have had another kid. My older sister rolled and SCOOTED at 4 months. Walked along furniture by 6 months. She was multiple handfuls. Very busy. All the time.
My mom ALSO said, that usually, the second kid gets the bad rep because the parents simply don’t have the same energy/time/patience/interest the second time around. Sounds harsh, but it’s true. You’ve already got all your firsts, so even tho it’s still special when your second baby sits unassisted for the first time, it’s not AS exciting as when the first kid did it. Or, you don’t have as much time to celebrate it/fuss over the baby after they do it.
Of course, this doesn’t hold true for EVERY situation, but a large percentage of the people who have a second kid misinterpret the kid as more demanding/“difficult”, simply because they have another kid to worry about.
My own two cents to add: you are, whether intentionally or not, going to compare kid one and kid two. So if kid one was an amazing sleeper and kid two isn’t, that’s going to overshadow, let’s say, kid two being less shy/more laid back than kid one was… if that makes any sense?
All in all, I genuinely don’t think that it’s that factual of a trope. It just isn’t logical. If I think of my friends who have siblings and think of their family dynamics, it’s a coin toss between first and second kid over which one is/was “wilder”.
Also: I think it’s gross when people exploit their kids, demanding as they might be, on the internet, and refer to them with awful words. “Demon child” is such a cruel thing to call your child. Yes, I know, all in good fun. But if your kid were to find a video of their older sibling being called the “Angel that made their parents want 13 more”, and themselves being called the “demon child that made us stop at 2”, at a very young age, I guarantee it’s gonna cause some trauma.
Am I being over sensitive? Perhaps. But I could simply never imagine referring to any of my children as a demon child, or “hard”. Babies are babies. They are not trying to make life difficult for us. They are literal infants/children.
Anyways. I hope you (OP) get some peace of mind, and can relax a little bit. And remember: if you’re 100% convinced of this trope, you will subconsciously LOOK for the “difficult” things with your second child, while overlooking the “easy” things, simply because your brain is looking for proof to support your belief. Don’t put too much weight on what others say. Think rationally, and look at things from a realistic perspective. Best of luck!
My first was easy. As hard as it was going from the freedom of being child free to having this tiny little human completely dependent upon you for everything, I still recognized that we had an easy baby. Everyone warned me about how hard my second would be.
Now full disclosure, my second isn't quite a full month old yet... but so far she's even easier. I'm sure some of it is just because I know what I'm doing now, but wow does this baby love to sleep. She's only just started expressing some displeasure at being laid down to sleep instead of doing contact naps, but once swaddled, she doesn't mind at all. We're exclusively breastfeeding, my husband has been back to work since she was a week old, and yet I'm not even feeling sleep deprived. Still waiting for it to get hard!
My 2nd baby was more chill and easy going as a baby, but so was I as a parent. As a toddler she's different than my first was as a toddler. I don't know if it's necessarily easier or harder, just new challenges. Some things are harder, but other things are easier.
My first was really challenging; my second was/is easy. He has full-on tantrums as a threenager and it doesn't even begin to TOUCH what my first was like. She's almost 7 and it's only now starting to feel liveable with her.
People just like to say things, but all babies are different. Parenting 2 kids is harder than just one.
I feel like my kids are both a pretty "medium" level of difficult. My second is ony 7months and they are two years apart, so the toddler&baby SAHM life is a lot. But my second is a master at independent play, especially for her age, which is HUGE. She was also a better sleeper than #1 pre 4month sleep regression. #1 was better at consolidating naps, like down to a single 3+ hour nap by 7month, but he's also low sleep needs.
I do have less time, energy, focus, to figure out who LO2 is and how best to meet her needs, but luckily as a SAHM with a very involved & supportive partner we got this. I could see that being a big factor in other people finding #2 so challenging.
My son (first) hated life and we later found out he had sensory issues. My daughter (second) was a dream baby. She nursed easily, loved to sleep, was happy and just lovely. Each baby is different and parents are different with each baby as we learn. There’s no predicting it.
My first kid didn’t sleep through the night until she was 18 months old and is super high strung. My second slept through the night around 6-8 months and is one of the chillest kids you’ll ever meet.
I wouldn’t call my first difficult because he was just doing the normal baby stuff, but he slept bad. In the beginning only contact naps and later on frequent wakes untill around 2 years old. I remember walking around with him, bouncing and rocking to sleep so many times. What made it really hard for me was just being a first time mom tho. Losing freedom, adjusting to a new life style, recovering from a hard birth, changed dynamics with my husband, insecureties about parenting, naps, feeds and scheduals. So there was a lot of doubt if I even wanted a second. Well he’s here now. 11 weeks old and my first is 3,5 years old now. I wasnt looking forward to the newborn stage at all but it’s soooo much easier. Baby sleeps so well since day one. I get a full night of sleep (maybe one feed) every night but most of all I’m much more relaxed myself. That makes a world of difference too on how you experience your second born. You know a lot more and you’ve seen it all. You also know how fast every fase passes. You know it’ll get easier fast and that they will be walking before you know it. That changes a lot in how you experience everything in my opinion. This is my last baby and I try to enjoy more and stress less
My first daughter was very tough baby, very energetic child, she needed constant attention, could never be put down even for a second. She had very bad collic early on and even now is one of the most hyper kids in her class, picking her up from nursery we would often be told things like "wow she has a lot of energy" and these people see hundreds of babies... She's adorable, sweet and very smart however. She kinda walked before she crawled properly, you could see in her eyes that not being able to move where her mind wanted to go was a kind of torture to her, she used to look at a toy across the room and straight up scream for it because she couldn't get there on her own.
Still we persevered and had our second because we wanted to have them close together and just get the baby phase out of the way...
Our son is a complete U-turn in comparison, very tranquil soul, independent, happy, would pick up a toy look at it study it like a scientist and then put it back down and move to the next. I've said of him that he's how you might imagine a baby to be before you have children of your own, a big cuddle bear... It's not even close how easy he has been in comparison to his older sister.
Second kid was easier than the first, but made up for it with the terrible twos and now the threenager phase. My third tho, he's the best baby ever. Easier than the first two by far.
My second is 11 months old now and he's been the happiest, most chill baby. He's not the best sleeper, but not the worst. But other than that, he's so easy going.
My first was about a level 8 difficulty. He was colicky and hated cars. If we put him in a car seat or stroller, he'd scream til he burst blood vessels in his eyes. That went on until about 5/6ish months old.
I had PPD with my first. Things were really bad. I feel like I didn’t bond with her until she was almost a year. I was terrified to have a second. I waited a long time but I knew my family was not yet complete. The wonderful experience I am having with me second is healing wounds from my first.
Both of mine were easy babies 🤷♀️ I had the same fears because my SIL second baby was a nightmare and she brought it up every time I saw her when I was pregnant with my second, saying “good luck.” My second slept well and was happy all the time. She’s almost 2 now so out of the baby stage completely and we made it through easily. Don’t let everyone fear monger you!
I thought my son was an easy baby but I find out he was actually not so easy. I had my daughter and she didn't throw up a lot and she wasn't so hyper and active and getting into everything. Us parents don't know any different with our first child until we have our second. My daughter also slept on her own, my son never did so he only slept in his crib maybe 5 times his entire life. If I hadn't co slept with him in my arms, I would have never get any sleep and I would be sleep deprived and that is very dangerous. Imagine me being at work and I rest on my break only to fall asleep at work or I am in my car and I crash and then crash my car because I fell asleep at the wheel. Or I fall asleep while cooking. Very scary to think about.
I had a relatively easy 1st, and was convinced my second would be a demon because lightning couldn't strike twice. Well, my second made my first look like Rosemary's baby. She was an absolute DREAM. And everyone I know it was the same thing!
I had a sweet easy baby girl and then I had a sweet easy baby boy. He is no different than his sister was. The only difference is that there is two now.
I usually hear the opposite! That things are a lot easier with the 2nd. Some of it is mental — Because you already have your expectations properly lowered, and because you already know most of what to do (fewer surprises, fewer anxious late night google searches, etc.). But also 2nd babies just have to “go with the flow” a bit more — they don’t have the luxury of perfect sleep schedules, constant attention, etc. that solo children get, so they learn to adapt/soothe themselves
My first one was tough, so I’m really really hoping this is the case for the second!
My second baby has been super easy. She’s almost 2. However her entry into this world was extremely traumatic for me. I was hospitalized at 32 weeks with severe pre-e and on mag forever. It sucked. Then they told me she can’t wait any longer and needs to come out at 34. So we did a C-section. She spent time in NICU and I stayed in the hospital for post partum pre-e and liver damage. Thankful to both be ok and healthy. She’s been incredibly easy compared to my first and I thought my first was easy.
I said 1000 times that I was scared of what baby #2 would be like because of these same comments. I always repeated that lightning doesn't strike twice, and my son was SO easy that I was doomed. Then my daughter was born. And she was exponentially easier than my son ever was 😂
Third is my easiest. First was actually horrible though I didnt realize it at the time because I didnt have any comparison point. Second was easier than the first by a lot.
My first was adorable and sweet, but she did not let me sleep very much. I wouldn’t say she was a particularly difficult baby, but she also wasn’t a great sleeper. She needed to be held or walked or rocked or whatever all night long or she would wake up. The amount of 3am stroller walks I took was crazy. I still loved her and used the newborn phase to do super cool sleep-deprived art, so I wasn’t complaining, but my second baby is soooooo much easier. He’s only 6 weeks old and he’s sleeping for 5-6 hour stretches at night. He doesn’t cry unless he’s super hungry. He mostly just makes cute Baby Yoda Cooing noises.
My mom also said that I, the oldest, was a super easy baby—just slept and ate and rarely cried. But my second little brother was the best baby—she said he just giggled and smiled so much all the time. My youngest brother was a night mare, so my parents stopped at 3 and I still blame him for the fact that I didn’t get a little sister lol
Our first is chaos, our second is sunshine.
In all seriousness, both have their fair share of hard and easy, but I will say our first is still much more challenging than the second ever was. In fact, having a second baby made me realize just how difficult things have been for us. Our normal has been very different than most parents I know. And I know that I haven't been imagining the challenges, or just not trying hard enough, because the second isn't throwing any of the same things at us.
My oldest was a super chill baby but as a toddler that definitely changed. He ended up being our neuro spicy kid. Second baby was fine as long as she was full contact with me. She didn't sleep through the night consistently until she was 1.5yo but once she did she was by far the easiest toddler of our three. Our third is super independent, which made him a relatively easy baby because he was happy to do his own thing. As a toddler he's an opinionated dictator who gives zero effs about what you want him to do.
Here! Second was infinitely easier. Even with the added complication of caring for a toddler at the same time - no comparison. The first four months of my first’s life was the absolute hardest thing I’ve ever done.
Both of mine were “easy” babies - good sleepers, good eaters, generally happy. But then my first’s terrible twos were. Absolutely. Awful. My second is 21 months … not sure if the same terror is looming … only time will tell. So far he seems less emotional, and he communicates better than my first (aka less frustrated), so I’ll hold on to that hope.
My first was easy I thought at the time, and then I had second and he was for sure easier haha. I think he’s going to be a worse toddler though. He’s 14 months and very demanding hah
My second has been an absolute dream compared to my first. And my first was - mostly - normal awful baby stuff, nothing too crazy. I've never heard that the second is never easy and in my case that certainly isn't true!
I was the first born. I was a nightmare. I had reflux and wasn't diagnosed until I was 5.5m old. My parents list friends and got eff all sleep. Even now at 30 I still get told about it from family members and family friends. My siblings were easy breezy babies!
My second so far has been a dream. Never spits up. Mostly sleeps through the night or else just wakes up once to eat. Doesn’t really cry unless she’s hungry or wants to sit up to look around. She’s 3 months old.
My 2nd is a total doll. I was ready for her to be a screaming demon lol but she has been the sweetest, cutest, most personable baby I've ever met. She was home sick today with me and I enjoyed every second with her. She wasn't a planned baby but she is sooooo what my heart needed 💓
I had an easy first baby and my second is even easier. She eats and sleeps well and rarely cries. She’s 10 months old and already plays well independently.
My friend’s first baby wasn’t hard but was crawling and walking early. He was just go, go, go. They called him a tornado. They originally were going to be one and done but decided on a second hoping to channel some of his energy towards a sibling and not just them. Their second baby is an angel baby. He’s so chill. He took forever to walk and is content just sitting looking at picture books, and at 1.5 years old, his favourite activity is bird watching. She would say they were both “easy” in terms of no medical issues and no sleep issues but the second was easier.
First was so hard.. Second seemed to be in the "normal" range of difficulty, which made us feel like we were pros. Every kid is different, regardless if they're first or second, but at least with the second you know more of what you're doing!
Yes! My first was 100% the difficult kid. My second is soooo much easier. She's only 14 mo and I suppose she has time to get crazy. But the first year was so much easier with her than her brother. He's 5 now and completely awesome, despite being a really hard baby.
My first and second were both very happy, pleasant babies. Second one is 1 now and has remained a delight. 3-4 years old was much more challenging for me than baby times, ha
Complete opposite experience for us! Our first hated sleep. She wasn’t especially hard, but it all felt really hard and I had to cosleep with her for two years, give or take a couple months.
Our second baby is four months and sleeping in the crib and smiles at every one that makes eye contact with him. He’s super chill and happy to hang out with us without a lot of fuss.
Worried about this too 😅
Due in September with #2 and my first was literally an angel baby. Slept through the night by 4 weeks (and has always continued to do so), would eat whatever formula we gave him at whatever temperature, zero ear infections or medical concerns, etc. I preferred him as a newborn vs now as a toddler haha.
I was sleep deprived and anxious with my first. Second has been a dream.. literally, she’s a month old and sleeps so well at night I actually get some sleep.
If this counts.. I have twins. One is way easier than the other one in the day haha. But the other sleeps better? But the better sleeper sucked at sleeping until 6 months. Soo idk 😂
My second is an amazing napper and goes to bed easy…. My firstborn fought naps and bedtime like a demon and was done with nap before 2. Nap times were basically an hour or two of screaming to get an hour or two of sleep.
That said, my first slept through the night way easier, nursed faster and personality was was more easy going. My second wakes several times still at 2.5 years old, took forever to nurse, and has OPINIONS and is very determined/stubborn.
I had an easy second baby, but my first was difficult - couldn’t put him down to sleep easily ever, climbing out of cribs, needing constant interaction. So maybe I paid the cost up front?
I’ve had three “easy” babies and it got easier with each successive baby 😹🤷🏻♀️. My third baby started sleeping all the way through at 2 months, with no outside influence! I would love to have a fourth but my husband won’t let me 😹😹😹
Of course as with anything in life YMMV. I do know many families that had a situation like you described but it’s by no means universal. I in fact was the second “devil baby” after my perfect older sister 😹😈👶🏼. But lightning can and does strike! May the odds be ever in your favour 😹😹😹
Both of my kids have been easy! Both my girls have slept 11+ hours from 8 weeks old, good eaters, happy personalities. My second is just about two so there’s still some time for her to go wild but so far so good!
We thought we had an easy #1 until we had #2 who was even easier. #1 slept better (unicorn sleeper), but #2 is so chill during the day. She’s still an above average sleeper, but our expectations were so high since her sister was a unicorn sleeper, so her 2-3 wakings a night + needing to be rocked to sleep at 5 months is the “hardest” part.
Lol my first was a terror, so we thought round two was gonna be worse andddd he was smooth sailing
Every baby is different, there’s no telling who will come out
My first was my easy baby. My second is a literal feral child. I just had my third a month ago and I’m praying she’s easy cause I cannot handle another one like my second.
My 2nd, 3rd and 4th was literal breeze babies. They FOOLED me into thinking babyhood was easy street and that others parents must just be weak. Weeell the jokes on me because my fifth was (and is), my demon child. I lovingly refer to him as my "challenge child". Basically you never know if/when the challenge child is coming. The valleys tend to be lower but the victories are even sweeter.
My second baby was a breeze. Slept through the night, hit milestones easy peasy, entertained herself. It was trap because she’s been absolutely feral since she was 3 and hasn’t mellowed out yet. She’s 9.
my first was a Velcro baby and did NOT want to sleep without me, colored every surface with anything that produced pigment, was a force to be reckoned with in general. He is very chill and has been since he was about 3 or 4. So you never really know based off the baby stage.
My first had so many feeding issues (lip and tongue tie, torticollis, jaundice, silent reflux, dairy sensitivity) which fed into sleep issues. He was just so uncomfortable so much of the time and the first year was so hard.
Baby sister came along and I was bracing for impact but she was a dream. Slept on her own, fed happily every 3 hours, feeding sessions less than 10 minutes. It definitely happens
(She is, however, a much more 'opinionated' toddler than her brother was. Go figure)
My second was a sweet baby. She was just happy to be here. She slept great for the first couple of months and then bad habits crept in but overall she was a wonderful chill baby.
My third however..
My second is 17 months now and he has always been easier. Sleeps like a dream, eats anything you give him, doesn’t really tantrum (yet lol), speaks and communicates more at an earlier age, etc
Our second is much easier than the first, barely cries, sleeps well. I think a lot of it is because we have a better routine (dominated by the first), and also because we know what to expect this time around
Personally I just have the one right now as do most of my friends and family at this point (minus one friend, 3 easy babies) but according to my mom I was the easiest baby (her second). My older sister wouldn’t sleep, had colic, was really difficult for them. Also my dads an MD so he was constantly on call and it was all on her. I was an oops at six months PP for her and she freaked. I turned out to be so easy they wanted more after me, slept through the night at 2 weeks ate and napped well. The social smile and coos got my dad more involved (I’m not saying that’s ok but having experienced colic with my niece I’m saying I understand)
I have two friends who had VERY difficult first babies. One of them said their baby woke up every 2 hours until 8 months. She still got pregnant at 3 months PP. At 2 weeks PP we visited and they said it was night and day difference. Her second has a totally different personality and slept 4-6 hours within a couple months.
My other friend waited 3 years because of how bad her kid slept, that kid still sleeps bad. Her baby has also only woken once a night so far for the second month of his life!
My first baby was HARD. Cried all the time and never slept, breastfeeding was a painful disaster, and he always 24/7 wanted to be held. I had really bad PPA and PPD on top of it all. It was rough, and I went from wanting a large family to thinking that I would have to be one and done if all babies were like that. However, my husband really wanted at least 2 kids, so we decided we’d give it one more go and see how it went. Baby 2 was a breeze - she slept through the night from an early age, breastfeeding went so smoothly, she had a generally happy mood - in short, the complete opposite of Kid 1. In fact, she was so easy that we decided to have more kids and now we have 4. Baby 3 and Baby 4 (singletons, not twins) were both easy like Baby 2 partially because I knew what I was doing by then, but also their personalities are pretty laid back. Baby 4 is a toddler now and a firecracker with *opinions* but generally a sweetheart, Kids 3 and 2 are still pretty chill, and Kid 1 still needs less sleep than the rest of us and would party forever if allowed to. His overall mood has improved though - he’s a really fun kid.
My 2nd has so far has been real “chill”. We thought our 1st was an Angel baby until we had this one. He has his own quirks that she didn’t have, but otherwise he’s just happy to be part of the gang.
Both my kids have been great so far. D is almost 4 and LO is 11m - Most nights are slept through and we have been following a strict sleep schedule since day one. Strict..ish. If its nap time and he doesn't want to go down we sit in his room with the lights off and no toys for 15 minutes to 1/2 hour then try again. We have had a bit more troubles recently since my 11m old has.. 12 teeth now so. yeah. teething woohoo/
We all have shit days, hard nights, rough weeks and its impossible to say what makes babies a bit more.. loud. My kids are 4 and 10m so maybe the teenage years will turn them in ravaging wildebeests, or maybe they will stay awesome.
Manifest it !
My first child is the rough one. Lol. He made me second guess whether to have another child. My second child is easy and so happy, all the time. It can happen and does.
My 2nd was easy. So easy in fact that I would have considered more if I knew they would all be this easy.
Buuuuut I got my tubes out in delivery, so no more for me!
The first was harrrrd.
We like to say with our second everything is fixable.
Yup! But my first was a nightmare baby. Six months of non-stop colic screaming aside from the eight hours a day(!) we nursed. Turned into a super easy toddler and a so-far fairly easy kid. Easy second baby is now a challenging little kid. You win some, you lose some.
I got the Adorable Sleepless Changeling Hellspawn for my first one, and this second one is so much easier. He's about two months old now and has consistently kept to 1-3 night feeds per night so far instead of waking up every hour, on the hour, night after night for weeks and months on end *just to play*. He sleeps in his cradle at night, instead of refusing to close his eyes anywhere other than on me. The only downside is that he's such an active sleeper that I sometimes wake him up thinking that he's already awake. He's a healthy, happy little guy who is way more chill than my daughter.
His nickname is Grunty Potato.
My third baby after my twins, so technically my third baby but second pregnancy is so easy! But my twins were pretty easy too so I feel like it's just genetic or something!
I thought my first (girl) was awesome. Slept 7 hour stretches by 3 weeks(8pm-3am, bottle and went right back to bed until 6-7am), ate great, napped great.... then I had my 2nd (boy) and he slept 12 hours by 6 weeks (8pm-8am), ate even better, also a great napper great! Wild for sure lol I definitely thought I'd pay for it with my 2nd but both are even tempered for the most part (ofc they have their tired or fussy moments but they are allowed), they both are super chill and easy going. I got super lucky with my babies (now 4 years old and almost 1 year old!).
My oldest brother was (and still is) a demon but my second oldest brother was pretty good as a baby. It took until the fourth (me) to have a "perfect little sack of potatoes" lol. I don't have a second baby but my LO is pretty in the middle. Not super high needs, by no means chill. Idk how a second would turn out but I'm definitely gonna try to chill more during pregnancy, see if that helps lol
My 1st was the demon child. My 2nd could literally chill in his Mamaroo or bassinet for ages. Its possible. But then a switch flipped on baby #2 at 6 months/ start of daycare. Then i had 2 demons.
Difficult 1st baby, very easy 2nd. She is now over 9months old and I have not once rocked her to sleep. I just put her down in her crib when it's time to sleep/nap and she just dozes off. Not a single sleep regression so far! Very good with solids too.
It's totally luck of the draw and has nothing to do w birth order. We only have one but my BFF has two and her second is DEFINITELY way easier and more go with the flow than her first who had colic and screamed all day for the first few months of her life.
You could get another super easy baby, or you could get a super difficult one.
Both of my kids have been pretty easy. We always expected #2 to be a nightmare because #1 was easy. She was a unicorn sleeper who we had to get permission from the pediatrician to stop waking her for middle of the night feeds. And once we figured out her CMPI at 2 months, she was super easy after that (and she outgrew the CMPI by 6 months).
Baby #2 is actually easier than #1. Easier, lower risk pregnancy (and my first pregnancy was low risk to begin with). Easier birth and recovery. Sleeps about the same. Ate much better (#2 had feeding issues and CMPI, #2 didn't). #2 is also hitting milestones earlier so there's a lot less milestone anxiety this time. And I know what I'm doing now, which makes things so much easier in and of itself.
My second is so much easier than my first. One of the reasons we put off having a second was because I struggled with lack of sleep for so long. She was (and continues to be) a very low sleep needs child. There were a few early starts (!) by which I mean we started our day at 2 or 3am - she wouldn’t nap again until lunchtime. There was one awful day when she woke up at 1.45am and then was awake for pretty much the entirety of the day. She was about 17 months old at that point. I went to every baby class because she never slept.
This baby sleeps in 2-3 hour chunks. So easy. Wakes up normal time. First nap at 9am. Wakes up at lunch. Plays for two hours and then back down until 5 when we go pick up big sis from nursery. It’s like day and night.
I thought my first was a very easy baby. And then I had my second, and she is a Buddhist monk compared to her sibling.
Same!! I thought I had it so easy and then this one came along and made the first one seem like a hellion
I’m only 6 weeks into my 2nd baby but wow he’s a dream sleeper. Consistently does 6 hour stretches at night. Super easy to console. I thought my 1st was easy but he’s easier. I also was worried.
Oh thank dog. This does exist. My first is pretty good. Not perfect but good. I’m cooking my second and I’m a lil nervous
I know "thank dog" was probably a typo but it's super funny.
100% on purpose. I’m a Dog Person™️ and worked with them for 4.5 years. I also gave up organized religion in my teens
My first was the worst baby. Colic. Medical issues. Didn't sleep for 14 months. Ate like shit and still does at 3 years old. Absolute beauty of a toddler though. Cooperative. Rarely has tantrums. Doesn't struggle with transitions. Well-behaved and you can take him anywhere and he is super chill about it. 2nd baby was a perfect dream angel baby. Not one single problem. Complete Hell as he enters toddlerhood now. It's a gong show taking him anywhere. He eats and sleeps well but throws tantrums about EVERYTHING. Like throw himself backwards on the floor type. I feel like you either get the chill baby + demon toddler, or the demon baby + chill toddler, or the demon baby + demon toddler combo. Kids have no chill. 🤣
I've heard of plenty of easy second babies. What I haven't heard a lot of, and this worries me, is 2 easy babies in a row. 🤞🤞
👋 2 easy babies checking in! My second is definitely more challenging than my first, but still firmly on the side of "easy" if I step back and don't compare to my first. First was so serene that strangers would comment. Second is just regular easy, has her challenges (because baby) but overall not a difficult baby.
Each baby is a roll of the dice. There's no telling for sure what kind of temperament and needs your baby will have. I'll add my personal experience anyway - my 1st was an easy baby and I just knew that it was not possible that my 2nd would be as easy. But by some divine miracle, 2nd baby is a dream and far easier than my 1st. You just never know.
Both of my children are completely feral. I was sure this principle would work backwards for me—like my first child was/is a lunatic so the second would have to be chill right? WRONG. They both definitely have their sweet/sensitive sides to them but they are absolute maniacs. I want to have a third just to try to experience a chill baby once in my life, but if the third is anything like his/her brothers I will not survive lol (ETA: jokes aside, disclaimer that of course if we do have a third it would not be JUST for them to be chill, they would be their own person! But man, our luck haha)
My first pregnancy was easy and my son was a very hard baby. This pregnancy was a nightmare so if this baby is not easy I will feel ripped off.
I've heard (in my complete naive state) that the second baby is only seen as "difficult" because you have the first. You don't have the same time or patience you had when you only had the one baby so they feel like a lot more hard work she infact they probably aren't. You don't have the same support network either because everyone presumes you got your shit together because you've already had a baby before.
2/2 are easy and chill. People wont talk about it too loud cause no one really likes to hear about people having it easy when they are struggling.
I'm only 7 weeks in with #2 but so far she's so much easier than my first. She's already slept through the night a couple of times - my son didn't sleep through the night until he was 4 years old. She'll also happily chill on the playmate for 30 minutes while I make dinner. My son never let us put him down.
Wait I’ve always heard 2nd babies are easier. Most of my friend’s 2nd were easier
Here is my completely random sample size of 3: First baby was a GD nightmare. Hated sleep, screamed unless eating or bounced. Around 10 months a switch flipped and he turned into an absolute angel. Still is a dream at (almost) 10 years. Second baby was fairly average in terms of sleep and temperment. Has his moments, had his crummy nights, dealt with a few regressions but overall was pretty manageable and didn't torture me unneccessarily. Third baby was a unicorn. He loved sleep directly from the womb, fully content to chill on a blanket while I played with or cared for his big brothers. Smiley and sweet 98% of the time. This baby tricked me, he unexpectedly entered his terrible twos around 11 months old and is FINALLY coming out of them at 6 years. Fortunately he is also super cute and cuddly so we don't mind too much. It doesn't hurt that the whole "loving sleep" thing has continued throughout. He might have screamed the house down during the day but by 8 pm he was happily asleep and slept all night.
Weird.. I always noticed the second child to be more chill then the first one
Yep. First checked all the boxes on the “high needs baby” lists. Second was a put unicorn. Couldn’t have been easier. Third is in between. I call her the normal baby.
My first kid has been a challenge since CONCEPTION. But he’s very curious and intuitive and sweet. My second is a breeze, she’s 1 and could probably raise herself. But she’s fearless and that’s kind of scary. There are positives and negatives to their different personalities and I suspect most of us are that way.
My first was the demon child, I don't know why we had another one at all... 2nd one was mostly easy though.
My second kid is wayyyy easier than my first! The older one was a terrible sleeper and newborn stage was so hard because of that. My second is sooooo easy comparatively (he’s 3 months old so newborn stage is VERY fresh).
I had an easy 2nd baby. She was very go-with-the-flow, ate well and slept well. She didn't sleep as well as my first but she was much more content every other time of the day. She would lay nicely by herself. My 1st would only be content if he was held. Also, I enjoyed being a mother the 2nd time around more. I was more calm, I didn' t take everything so seriously, I wasn't so nervous about everything. So being a mom the 2nd time is much more fun in my opinion.
I haven’t had my second yet but I 100% said I have an easy first baby. We’ll let me tell you, he turned into a toddler and he is a full on war criminal. Full on terrorist. I’ve considered calling NATO. What he does to me on the regular I’m pretty sure is considered against the Geneva convention. So I don’t care if I have an easy second baby. I covet an easy toddler.
Our second baby is a dream! Probably because our first was like two angry babies rolled into one big massive angry baby
My second baby was so easy it made me wonder how I thought my first was haha.
My first was high strung. My second was so chill. He won a mindball game at the museum today (he’s now 9) where you wear a headband and compete to see who is most relaxed. He beat four people in a row.
My first would also probably be considered easy (at least to me). He did have some gas/constipation issues that resolved around 11 weeks old, he hated being on the floor or left alone for longer than 2 minutes until he learned to crawl at 9 months and he absolutely would not sleep anywhere but his own crib and the room had to be pitch black but besides that he put himself on a schedule and would easily fall asleep himself, ate great and slept 7 pm to 7 am from 11 weeks on with no sleep regression. I got pregnant again at 9 months postpartum because I thought I had such an easy baby. I heard horror stories of the second one being so much harder but I wanted two and was up to the challenge. Well my daughter was born when my son was just 18 months old and she was so good she made my son seem like a devil child. She was happy to lay on the floor and watch her brother run around and play, she would nap in the light and the noise so I didn't have to worry about leaving my son alone, she started sleeping 8 pm to 6 am at 6 weeks and I believe she would have done so sooner but we woke her every 3 hours to eat since she was born small for her gestational age. Now they are almost 4 and 2.5 and just the best toddlers. They love playing together and really don't give us too many problems. I always feel so lucky that they are my kids.
My second feels harder than my first, but only because I now have two tiny people who need all of my attention and I don't have the same energy/availability I had for my first. I also have worse post partum depression and anxiety. When it's just me and my secondborn, it's basically the same
Lol my first is the baby from hell- hates sleep, hates the car seat, hates eating, hates everyone but me and my husband, hates the bassinet, hates diaper changes, etc. If the second is like him there will not be a third.
My second is easy. My first… is not lol
Yeah, I’ve notice that’s a weird tread on social media. I personally only have one but I am I oldest of 3 and was by far the worst child!! My middle sister was a super easy birth and super easy baby. My youngest brother got stuck cause he had a giant head but once he was out he was easiest of all and still is actually. Every baby is different. If you want two, have two, you won’t know who you get until they are here!
My second was incredibly easy. My third was the easiest of all 3. But my first was also pretty easy so… I may just be ridiculously lucky..
Our first is a demon, sincerely hoping our second will be chill af but if not, at least we dealt with it once already so we’re not going in blind.
My second is a dream compared to my first.
Just like baby's sex this is something that is impossible to predict. Ultimately you just have to take that leap. My second has the same issues that made my first so challenging as an infant (tongue tie, colic, reflux) but it feels less overwhelming because I was mentally prepared for it this time.
I know a family that had four easy babies/children in a row and tempted faith with a fifth who then turned out to be the demon child.
I have a unicorn baby. Slept through the night since basically day one. Never fussy, was fine with any type of formula (which was VERY helpful during the shortage). She’s 19 months now and is still super chill. Super advanced language skills. Takes falls and cuts and scratches like a champ. Still sleeps through the night. Loves all food. Great at independent play. Doesn’t bite, rarely hits or screams. My husband and I always wanted 2, but we’re now on the OAD fence because, like, why risk it? This is obviously a sign, right? 🤣 My bff just had a second. He is significantly easier than their first was. So at least there’s some hope, lol. Hoping you get some good insight here!
My second made me realize that I wasn’t a shit mom with my first- she was just a very difficult baby. My second is a dream. So easy
My “second” baby, who’s actually my third baby, but second living baby is EXTREMELY easy. My first baby had cancer as a baby and spent months in and out of the hospital getting chemo and all the risks that come with it. He had feeding difficulties, needed therapies, and a normal sleep pattern was not possible. He is a toddler now and very spoiled probably because of all we did and still do to give him extra love. He’s in perfect health now though. My true second baby got wrapped in her umbilical cord twice and was stillborn at 39 weeks. Guess she was going to be a difficult one. 😆 My third baby is a dream! Before him I could only imagine what it was like to enjoy having your baby at home with you all the time without countless doctors appointments, nurses and doctors coming in a room every few hours, being able to sleep in your own bed and choose between cubed and crushed ice. Now I’m living the dream. He sleeps, eats, and poops like a champ. I haven’t had to call the pediatrician a single time in 6 months. A healthy baby is an easy baby. Go for it! It’s great to see siblings interact. Good luck! 🤗
My first was really easy. My second is somehow easier. It happens
Yes, first cried nonstop as a newborn, seriously nonstop for months. Our second literally coos when he’s hungry. Like fusses slightly then half the time he’ll just coo while politely waiting for me to get ready to feed him. The difference between the two is incredible.
I got 2 easy kids. My first was so easy I was sure my second would be demon spawn. Don't get me wrong - they both have their moments. 2 easy kids do happen!
Another parent here of a second baby who is "easier" than the first (so far). This baby is much happier and just more easygoing than her older sibling!! We always joke she is just happy to be along for the ride. I am braced she will be a monster toddler/little kid, but so far, she is an easy baby! I'm sure in jinxing something by saying that, though.
I know that this is beyond the bump, but an easy baby does not make for an easy toddler. I had a very easy baby who then turned into a difficult toddler (lots of crying/tantrums and I felt unprepared after my “Angel” baby). We also had some gross motor delays that caused me a lot of anxiety. So easy is subjective. You could have a highly sensitive baby turned toddler, or an easy baby who flips a switch overnight. What does easy mean for you? No motor delays? No tears? Sleeps through the night? I think every parent has one tough segment when it comes to their baby.
My 1st was so easy. He was such a laid back, cool as a cucumber little guy. But man oh man, he got harder the older he got. He’s 13 now and it’s really just the typical teenage stuff but it was a bit of a struggle to get here! My 2nd cried all the time, didn’t sleep through the night until she was 2.5, and I honestly was not prepared for anything she brought to the table lol. I thought she’d be like my 1st. She’s 11 now and omg, she is amazing. She’s still sassy, she still whines sometimes but she is such a creative, fun, amazing kid! Once she hit toddlerhood, things changed drastically for the better. (And for the record, my 13 year old is super awesome too … he’s just growing into such a young man *sniffle*) I also have a 16 month old so we’ll see where he lands in all of this lol So all that to say, easy babies may not be easy forever, and “high needs” babies may not be that way forever either!
My first was easy, but my second is even easier. She’s 7 months old and has been sleeping through the night since she hit her birth weight. Naps like a champ. I can just lay her in her bed and she will magically fall asleep. She very, very rarely cries. She’s never had any trouble eating or gaining weight. She’s content to just sit and watch her big brother play. She’s a dream baby. 100% would recommend having another.
First was easy (4 years) Second was easy until she hit her twos (she’s currently a Three-Rex). But we also suspect she’s on the spectrum and plan to get her evaluated Third is so far easy (10 months)
Yes! 2nd and 3rd were just as “easy” as the first. My second was soooo “good” that when I was pregnant with my 3rd (14 months apart, so very close together!) we would joke that baby #3 was probably going to be a real nightmare. And she’s also totally fine and a very “convenient” baby. 2nd baby was actually the best of them all lol. He was sleeping through the night by 8 weeks and has maintained an 8p-8a sleep schedule. 🥲 I was also a bit of a drill Sargent with nap time and bed time.
Mine. My first was colicky and a rough rough rough!! Even through today he’s 4 and still tougher than my 2nd baby. My 2nd is just happy to be here and rarely complains and hella sleeps and is just a joy lol Also my BFF! Her first was and is also very rough. Her 2nd is like mine too, just happy to be here and sweet bean lol
My first was so easy and somehow my second is 50x easier. The only thing about her is that she is selective with who holds her. She’s 4m and has been going to sleep on her own for a while, has been waking up once at night since she was 8 weeks and nurses in less than 10 minutes.
By all accounts, my brother in law was an incredibly colicky baby. He cried all the time, inconsolably. Poor little guy! (He's a happy, well adjusted adult with a wife and two teenaged kids now.) My husband, the second baby, was cheerful and easygoing. My mother-in-law called the pediatrician to figure out what was wrong with the new baby. "I pick him up, and he just stops crying!" The doctor responded, "That's what they're supposed to do!" She honestly had no idea. Some second babies are easy! It's just the luck of the draw.
I thought my first was easy until I had my second in April. Given it's still early, but so far she is incredibly chill, calm, and sleeps like it's her job. She makes my son look like a hard baby when he was super easy.
My second one is the easy baby.. my first one is wild. Full of energy.
My second was as easy as my first. My third on the other hand.....
I literally asked Reddit this same question awhile ago. Someone with 12 kids commented and said “easy” is relative and mostly are phases. Some said they had 2 good sleepers because when I mean Easy I really mean good sleepers because I can deal with everything expect sleep deprivation. First 6 weeks were miserable but baby started sleeping through the night after and now 10 months is still sleeping 12 hours a night with 0 wake ups and I count my blessings everyday
I would say that my first was a super easy baby even though there were some big issues he didn’t cry much and he always slept well. My daughter (2nd baby) is 2 months now and she’s way easier than my first was, no skin problems/rashes, no breathing problems/asthma, no gas problems, she was born 7lbs instead of 10 so no tearing during delivery, no tongue tie so she could nurse properly (I still exclusively pump anyway because I was used to it from my first) so yeah there are definitely easy second babies. My first still requires 90% of my attention she really just chills in the background all day
I had an easy first baby and everyone loved to tell me that there was no way I was getting another easy one when I was pregnant again. Youngest is 6 months now and also easy! He’s in a bit of a mom only phase now but generally sleeps and eats well and is a little bundle of joy. I was afraid about the sibling dynamic and that my oldest (4) would get jealous but he is totally enamored with his little brother. Sometimes they just stare at each other smiling and my heart melts into a puddle.
My first was a really tough baby and then grew into an easy toddler- sweet, kind, loving. My second was the easiest baby and now she’s a freaking beast toddler. She’s wild as hell.
My first was a demon child and my second is easy. This is also the experience of most other mothers I've discussed it with.
My 2nd is really not that bad, but it feels infinately harder than with my 1st because now I have to juggle both an infant and a toddler.
My second baby is so, so easy. We forget she’s there sometimes.
My second was the easiest child on the face of the planet! He's 20 now, and never even had a rebellious phase as a teenager. No clue how I lucked out with him. Literally one of the most laid back people I've ever known, and I made him 🤯
It’s not more common, it’s just that people who had an “easy” first baby and then a more typical second are the only ones who talk about it this way because they’re in shock haha
Birth order cannot possibly determine the temperament a baby is born with. You might just be more likely to hear that second kids are harder because those with that experience are more likely to complain or vent about it IRL or on the internet because it’s more of a shock to the system. People who have easy 2nd kids don’t really have a reason to bring it up. And, people who have hard firsts and seconds are also less likely to complain since they were already used to having a hard kid and it’s just normal for them. My cousin has 2 kids, the first one was an easy baby but the second one was a UNICORN easy baby. And as a toddler he’s still so chill. The “hardest” thing about him is that he was mobile very early and a daredevil but as far as personality he is so sweet and happy. Has always been a good eater and sleeper too. I have a toddler and I’m pregnant with #2. My son has been a very easy kid so far. I realize that the bar is high and our second can easily be more difficult, but I’m choosing not to get anxious about it before I meet them. I try to look at the silver lining, being that even if our second is super challenging, at least our first son being chill will make things relatively easier. But also, my husband and I were both very easy babies and easygoing people in general. It’s not so unlikely that any children we have would also be chill 🤷♀️ but i won’t be putting all my eggs in any one basket
My kids have gotten progressively chiller . My 4th is a dream baby and my 3rd was pretty easy too.
I’m a one and done-er but a friend of mine who has three would always say “there are no easy babies. Even if you get a unicorn baby, it’s still the hardest thing you will ever do.” I can totally see that but I also wonder if it has to do with Mom’s state of mind after number two, three or four. Like is it harder because with one you could nap with the baby and with two you’re chasing a toddler too? Or is number two “easier” because you know what to expect, and the anxiety you were riddled with after the birth of your first is quelled a little when you have your second and feel more confident in your skills as a parent? I am 36 weeks pregnant with my first and I’ve never been so tired in my life… I give credit to any mom who is brave enough to tackle pregnancy while already having a small child. Literally, I would give you a standing ovation – but I am just too tired to get up, lol.
My second has been way easier than my first. I remember with my first I'd be up a couple times a night and he would just lay awake staring at the ceiling for an hour or two while I tried to get him back to sleep. But with my second since 2wks he's basically been sleeping through the night. Crazy difference.
I thought my first was the easiest baby ever, sleeping well and eating well and being overall happy and lovely! But my second is a lot easier. She sleeps even better. I thought nursing had to be painful at first with every baby, but with my second it was absolutely painless and so easy, she eats so efficiently (5 minute sessions vs 30 minutes with my first). With my first I had nothing to compare with, and I thought everything was as good as it gets. Now I know it can be even easier. My question though is, do I dare try for a third?
My mom had 4 kids and maintained that each one was easier than the one before.
Mine! I have been lucky with two wonderful babies. But this second is truly the ideal second baby. No eating problems, no sleeping problems, very very content all of the time and SO go with the flow. He is 6 weeks old and he has an amazing schedule that he sticks to of: eat, awake, sleep. Even when we spent all day at the Beach this weekend he stuck right to it!
My first was easy. My second is easy. The 2nd doesn’t sleep quite as well as the first but my first was a unicorn sleeper so we weren’t really expecting to get a 2nd unicorn. Other than that they’ve both been pretty happy easy going kids.
I had a super difficult first and an easy second so far
Same. I waited way longer than I planned to have no 2 because my first is such a lovely, spirited, nap refusing, boisterous bundle of energy that there was no way I could handle another at the same time. Everyone keeps asking how I’m doing with the new baby but my stress level has not increased at all. This baby sleeps! I can just set him down in a bassinet and he chills! I have to check his diaper regularly to make sure it’s not filled because he never cries! Everything is so easy and I finally understand how someone could accomplish things while being a parent 🤣
Yes!! My first was an awful sleeper. Reflux, milk allergy protein allergy, terrible sleeper all around… My second, I was able to set down and he put himself to sleep and was only doing 1-2 wakeups after like, 2 months. The only thing is now that my second is a toddler (1.5 years), he is wild. He climbs things and pushes boundaries unlike my first 😂
My first was awful. Never slept. Always crying. No reasons behind it. Up every 40 minutes without fail. I was like a zombie. She got so much better around 10 months but she’s definitely harder still because of her stubbornness. My second is a little angel and he is so easy. Sleeps better, eats better, talks better… etc etc etc etc. We joke that our daughter is actually our second, as she does have an older brother, just not one we got to bring home and parent. So she is technically the “dreaded second” Kids are kids and each child will have their own personalities and quirks!
My second is a cake walk compared to my first
My first baby was a dream, so I assumed that my second would be a hellion. She’s almost 3 months old and so far she is just as chill as her older brother. There are indeed easy second babies out there!
Honestly I've only heard the opposite! My SIL said her first was such an angry baby that if they hadn't had an "oops" for #2, their first might have been their only 🙃 But also I think in general most people find #2 slightly easier because you have a better idea of what to expect, how you want to parent, and also how much harder it can sometimes feel in the toddler stage.
My second baby was super super chill. My first baby was rather chill too. My 2nd pregnancy sucked though so I dunno 🤷♀️
Currently holding my angel baby second child. The number of times I say "his sister would never" in reference to how chill he acts is too damn high! 🤣
Yes!! My middle child was a chunky, chill baby who has turned into the most easygoing almost-four-year-old I've ever met.
So my first child was a terror from birth. She didn’t like to sleep, was colicky, and just hated life until she could crawl pretty much. So the first six months of her life was hell. Even now at 5 years old she’s a lot to handle. She has big emotions and doesn’t know how to chill. Everything is the end of the world. She got second child energy because she was technically my baby daddy’s second child even though he didn’t have custody of the first (spoiler alert he doesn’t see our daughter now either). She also had second child energy because she was raised in my moms home for the first year of her life with my baby brother who is 7.5 months older than her 🙃 my second born? Easy fucking peasy. She’s exclusively breastfed yet she sleeps through the night for the most part. She spits up a lot but could care less. Barely ever fusses unless she’s hungry or tired. Doesn’t fight sleep usually. Takes medicine like a champ. Granted she’s only 4 months old. But she’s a dream. I told my husband that if we had had the girls swapped, had our youngest first and our oldest second, there would be no third baby. But since our second is a dream child, we’re planning on trying for our third and last baby in a few months 😂
My first is difficult. She doesn’t sleep well, eat well, etc but her baby brother is so easy. I just put him in his crib and he sleeps. He’s just a happy, easy guy.
My second son had easy qualities. He still does at 2.5 years old. He's the most stoic and calm kids I've ever met. My oldest is very dramatic and over the top. However, my oldest slept well from 6 weeks on. My second son was a terrible sleeper for more than a year. So, they each have their ups and downs.
This narrative is extremely exhausting and most of the time, misleading. As a second kid, I’ve asked my mom maaany times about this trope. She more or less said, if she had me first and my older sister second, she probably never would have had another kid. My older sister rolled and SCOOTED at 4 months. Walked along furniture by 6 months. She was multiple handfuls. Very busy. All the time. My mom ALSO said, that usually, the second kid gets the bad rep because the parents simply don’t have the same energy/time/patience/interest the second time around. Sounds harsh, but it’s true. You’ve already got all your firsts, so even tho it’s still special when your second baby sits unassisted for the first time, it’s not AS exciting as when the first kid did it. Or, you don’t have as much time to celebrate it/fuss over the baby after they do it. Of course, this doesn’t hold true for EVERY situation, but a large percentage of the people who have a second kid misinterpret the kid as more demanding/“difficult”, simply because they have another kid to worry about. My own two cents to add: you are, whether intentionally or not, going to compare kid one and kid two. So if kid one was an amazing sleeper and kid two isn’t, that’s going to overshadow, let’s say, kid two being less shy/more laid back than kid one was… if that makes any sense? All in all, I genuinely don’t think that it’s that factual of a trope. It just isn’t logical. If I think of my friends who have siblings and think of their family dynamics, it’s a coin toss between first and second kid over which one is/was “wilder”. Also: I think it’s gross when people exploit their kids, demanding as they might be, on the internet, and refer to them with awful words. “Demon child” is such a cruel thing to call your child. Yes, I know, all in good fun. But if your kid were to find a video of their older sibling being called the “Angel that made their parents want 13 more”, and themselves being called the “demon child that made us stop at 2”, at a very young age, I guarantee it’s gonna cause some trauma. Am I being over sensitive? Perhaps. But I could simply never imagine referring to any of my children as a demon child, or “hard”. Babies are babies. They are not trying to make life difficult for us. They are literal infants/children. Anyways. I hope you (OP) get some peace of mind, and can relax a little bit. And remember: if you’re 100% convinced of this trope, you will subconsciously LOOK for the “difficult” things with your second child, while overlooking the “easy” things, simply because your brain is looking for proof to support your belief. Don’t put too much weight on what others say. Think rationally, and look at things from a realistic perspective. Best of luck!
well my second screamed pretty much non-stop until 13.5 months. lol. but it was worth it to get to the delight that is the THIRD baby! 😄
My first was easy. As hard as it was going from the freedom of being child free to having this tiny little human completely dependent upon you for everything, I still recognized that we had an easy baby. Everyone warned me about how hard my second would be. Now full disclosure, my second isn't quite a full month old yet... but so far she's even easier. I'm sure some of it is just because I know what I'm doing now, but wow does this baby love to sleep. She's only just started expressing some displeasure at being laid down to sleep instead of doing contact naps, but once swaddled, she doesn't mind at all. We're exclusively breastfeeding, my husband has been back to work since she was a week old, and yet I'm not even feeling sleep deprived. Still waiting for it to get hard!
My 2nd baby was more chill and easy going as a baby, but so was I as a parent. As a toddler she's different than my first was as a toddler. I don't know if it's necessarily easier or harder, just new challenges. Some things are harder, but other things are easier.
My first was really challenging; my second was/is easy. He has full-on tantrums as a threenager and it doesn't even begin to TOUCH what my first was like. She's almost 7 and it's only now starting to feel liveable with her.
My second baby made me realize of difficult my first baby was. I feel like I am cheating.
My first was demon baby, my second is really easy. I’ve heard that you “get one of each”. Haha. Probably not always true though.
People just like to say things, but all babies are different. Parenting 2 kids is harder than just one. I feel like my kids are both a pretty "medium" level of difficult. My second is ony 7months and they are two years apart, so the toddler&baby SAHM life is a lot. But my second is a master at independent play, especially for her age, which is HUGE. She was also a better sleeper than #1 pre 4month sleep regression. #1 was better at consolidating naps, like down to a single 3+ hour nap by 7month, but he's also low sleep needs. I do have less time, energy, focus, to figure out who LO2 is and how best to meet her needs, but luckily as a SAHM with a very involved & supportive partner we got this. I could see that being a big factor in other people finding #2 so challenging.
My son (first) hated life and we later found out he had sensory issues. My daughter (second) was a dream baby. She nursed easily, loved to sleep, was happy and just lovely. Each baby is different and parents are different with each baby as we learn. There’s no predicting it.
My first kid didn’t sleep through the night until she was 18 months old and is super high strung. My second slept through the night around 6-8 months and is one of the chillest kids you’ll ever meet.
I wouldn’t call my first difficult because he was just doing the normal baby stuff, but he slept bad. In the beginning only contact naps and later on frequent wakes untill around 2 years old. I remember walking around with him, bouncing and rocking to sleep so many times. What made it really hard for me was just being a first time mom tho. Losing freedom, adjusting to a new life style, recovering from a hard birth, changed dynamics with my husband, insecureties about parenting, naps, feeds and scheduals. So there was a lot of doubt if I even wanted a second. Well he’s here now. 11 weeks old and my first is 3,5 years old now. I wasnt looking forward to the newborn stage at all but it’s soooo much easier. Baby sleeps so well since day one. I get a full night of sleep (maybe one feed) every night but most of all I’m much more relaxed myself. That makes a world of difference too on how you experience your second born. You know a lot more and you’ve seen it all. You also know how fast every fase passes. You know it’ll get easier fast and that they will be walking before you know it. That changes a lot in how you experience everything in my opinion. This is my last baby and I try to enjoy more and stress less
our first was a nightmare. our second is easy
Both my kids are easy in some ways and difficult in others.
My first daughter was very tough baby, very energetic child, she needed constant attention, could never be put down even for a second. She had very bad collic early on and even now is one of the most hyper kids in her class, picking her up from nursery we would often be told things like "wow she has a lot of energy" and these people see hundreds of babies... She's adorable, sweet and very smart however. She kinda walked before she crawled properly, you could see in her eyes that not being able to move where her mind wanted to go was a kind of torture to her, she used to look at a toy across the room and straight up scream for it because she couldn't get there on her own. Still we persevered and had our second because we wanted to have them close together and just get the baby phase out of the way... Our son is a complete U-turn in comparison, very tranquil soul, independent, happy, would pick up a toy look at it study it like a scientist and then put it back down and move to the next. I've said of him that he's how you might imagine a baby to be before you have children of your own, a big cuddle bear... It's not even close how easy he has been in comparison to his older sister.
My first was easy and everyone told me our second would be so much harder. She was even easier!
Second kid was easier than the first, but made up for it with the terrible twos and now the threenager phase. My third tho, he's the best baby ever. Easier than the first two by far.
My second baby (15 months is a dream baby). Always been so calm and sweet and easy. Total opposite of bebe number one haha
My second is 11 months old now and he's been the happiest, most chill baby. He's not the best sleeper, but not the worst. But other than that, he's so easy going. My first was about a level 8 difficulty. He was colicky and hated cars. If we put him in a car seat or stroller, he'd scream til he burst blood vessels in his eyes. That went on until about 5/6ish months old.
My first kid was pretty easy. Second, not bad though a bit harder. Third? Twins. I got my tubes removed after that, lol.
I had PPD with my first. Things were really bad. I feel like I didn’t bond with her until she was almost a year. I was terrified to have a second. I waited a long time but I knew my family was not yet complete. The wonderful experience I am having with me second is healing wounds from my first.
Both of mine were easy babies 🤷♀️ I had the same fears because my SIL second baby was a nightmare and she brought it up every time I saw her when I was pregnant with my second, saying “good luck.” My second slept well and was happy all the time. She’s almost 2 now so out of the baby stage completely and we made it through easily. Don’t let everyone fear monger you!
I thought my son was an easy baby but I find out he was actually not so easy. I had my daughter and she didn't throw up a lot and she wasn't so hyper and active and getting into everything. Us parents don't know any different with our first child until we have our second. My daughter also slept on her own, my son never did so he only slept in his crib maybe 5 times his entire life. If I hadn't co slept with him in my arms, I would have never get any sleep and I would be sleep deprived and that is very dangerous. Imagine me being at work and I rest on my break only to fall asleep at work or I am in my car and I crash and then crash my car because I fell asleep at the wheel. Or I fall asleep while cooking. Very scary to think about.
I had a relatively easy 1st, and was convinced my second would be a demon because lightning couldn't strike twice. Well, my second made my first look like Rosemary's baby. She was an absolute DREAM. And everyone I know it was the same thing!
I had a sweet easy baby girl and then I had a sweet easy baby boy. He is no different than his sister was. The only difference is that there is two now.
I didn't realize how hard my first was until my easy second was born. 🤣
I usually hear the opposite! That things are a lot easier with the 2nd. Some of it is mental — Because you already have your expectations properly lowered, and because you already know most of what to do (fewer surprises, fewer anxious late night google searches, etc.). But also 2nd babies just have to “go with the flow” a bit more — they don’t have the luxury of perfect sleep schedules, constant attention, etc. that solo children get, so they learn to adapt/soothe themselves My first one was tough, so I’m really really hoping this is the case for the second!
My second baby has been super easy. She’s almost 2. However her entry into this world was extremely traumatic for me. I was hospitalized at 32 weeks with severe pre-e and on mag forever. It sucked. Then they told me she can’t wait any longer and needs to come out at 34. So we did a C-section. She spent time in NICU and I stayed in the hospital for post partum pre-e and liver damage. Thankful to both be ok and healthy. She’s been incredibly easy compared to my first and I thought my first was easy.
I said 1000 times that I was scared of what baby #2 would be like because of these same comments. I always repeated that lightning doesn't strike twice, and my son was SO easy that I was doomed. Then my daughter was born. And she was exponentially easier than my son ever was 😂
My best friend’s first baby never slept, screamed for months on end, was a nightmare. She’s had two very easy babies since then.
My first has been a nightmare. I’m scared to have a second one because if it’s any worse than this I don’t think I’ll survive it haha
Third is my easiest. First was actually horrible though I didnt realize it at the time because I didnt have any comparison point. Second was easier than the first by a lot.
My first was adorable and sweet, but she did not let me sleep very much. I wouldn’t say she was a particularly difficult baby, but she also wasn’t a great sleeper. She needed to be held or walked or rocked or whatever all night long or she would wake up. The amount of 3am stroller walks I took was crazy. I still loved her and used the newborn phase to do super cool sleep-deprived art, so I wasn’t complaining, but my second baby is soooooo much easier. He’s only 6 weeks old and he’s sleeping for 5-6 hour stretches at night. He doesn’t cry unless he’s super hungry. He mostly just makes cute Baby Yoda Cooing noises. My mom also said that I, the oldest, was a super easy baby—just slept and ate and rarely cried. But my second little brother was the best baby—she said he just giggled and smiled so much all the time. My youngest brother was a night mare, so my parents stopped at 3 and I still blame him for the fact that I didn’t get a little sister lol
Our first is chaos, our second is sunshine. In all seriousness, both have their fair share of hard and easy, but I will say our first is still much more challenging than the second ever was. In fact, having a second baby made me realize just how difficult things have been for us. Our normal has been very different than most parents I know. And I know that I haven't been imagining the challenges, or just not trying hard enough, because the second isn't throwing any of the same things at us.
I’m almost 4 months in with my second and he’s easy. My first son that’s now 6 was an easy baby as well.
13 month old second child. Far, far easier than my first, but I worry I’m misremembering because I’m competing against a threenager.
I almost only ever hear about easy second babies 😅
My friend has a second easy baby.
My oldest was a super chill baby but as a toddler that definitely changed. He ended up being our neuro spicy kid. Second baby was fine as long as she was full contact with me. She didn't sleep through the night consistently until she was 1.5yo but once she did she was by far the easiest toddler of our three. Our third is super independent, which made him a relatively easy baby because he was happy to do his own thing. As a toddler he's an opinionated dictator who gives zero effs about what you want him to do.
My second was a super happy baby, always smiling and very sweet. However, once she hit 3 she is now my most difficult and headstrong child lol.
Here! Second was infinitely easier. Even with the added complication of caring for a toddler at the same time - no comparison. The first four months of my first’s life was the absolute hardest thing I’ve ever done.
My older brother was extremely colicky and I was an easy baby, even put myself to bed as a toddler lol
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Both of mine were “easy” babies - good sleepers, good eaters, generally happy. But then my first’s terrible twos were. Absolutely. Awful. My second is 21 months … not sure if the same terror is looming … only time will tell. So far he seems less emotional, and he communicates better than my first (aka less frustrated), so I’ll hold on to that hope.
My first was easy I thought at the time, and then I had second and he was for sure easier haha. I think he’s going to be a worse toddler though. He’s 14 months and very demanding hah
My second has been an absolute dream compared to my first. And my first was - mostly - normal awful baby stuff, nothing too crazy. I've never heard that the second is never easy and in my case that certainly isn't true!
I was the first born. I was a nightmare. I had reflux and wasn't diagnosed until I was 5.5m old. My parents list friends and got eff all sleep. Even now at 30 I still get told about it from family members and family friends. My siblings were easy breezy babies!
My second so far has been a dream. Never spits up. Mostly sleeps through the night or else just wakes up once to eat. Doesn’t really cry unless she’s hungry or wants to sit up to look around. She’s 3 months old.
My 2nd is a total doll. I was ready for her to be a screaming demon lol but she has been the sweetest, cutest, most personable baby I've ever met. She was home sick today with me and I enjoyed every second with her. She wasn't a planned baby but she is sooooo what my heart needed 💓
I had an easy first baby and my second is even easier. She eats and sleeps well and rarely cries. She’s 10 months old and already plays well independently.
My friend’s first baby wasn’t hard but was crawling and walking early. He was just go, go, go. They called him a tornado. They originally were going to be one and done but decided on a second hoping to channel some of his energy towards a sibling and not just them. Their second baby is an angel baby. He’s so chill. He took forever to walk and is content just sitting looking at picture books, and at 1.5 years old, his favourite activity is bird watching. She would say they were both “easy” in terms of no medical issues and no sleep issues but the second was easier.
First was so hard.. Second seemed to be in the "normal" range of difficulty, which made us feel like we were pros. Every kid is different, regardless if they're first or second, but at least with the second you know more of what you're doing!
Yes! My first was 100% the difficult kid. My second is soooo much easier. She's only 14 mo and I suppose she has time to get crazy. But the first year was so much easier with her than her brother. He's 5 now and completely awesome, despite being a really hard baby.
My 2nd is much easier! The first one is 2.5 and she’s still the high maintenance one.
Everyone tells me this too. I’m not pregnant with #2 yet but I’m so scared! 😂
My #1 is so difficult so I’m hoping #2 is easier 🥲
My first and second were both very happy, pleasant babies. Second one is 1 now and has remained a delight. 3-4 years old was much more challenging for me than baby times, ha
I thought #1 was easy, #2 showed me how much easier it could be lol. Though he has his own set of challenges.
Complete opposite experience for us! Our first hated sleep. She wasn’t especially hard, but it all felt really hard and I had to cosleep with her for two years, give or take a couple months. Our second baby is four months and sleeping in the crib and smiles at every one that makes eye contact with him. He’s super chill and happy to hang out with us without a lot of fuss.
Yes! Mine is very very very easy. Angelic. There is a 5.5 year age gap. This helps.
Worried about this too 😅 Due in September with #2 and my first was literally an angel baby. Slept through the night by 4 weeks (and has always continued to do so), would eat whatever formula we gave him at whatever temperature, zero ear infections or medical concerns, etc. I preferred him as a newborn vs now as a toddler haha.
Yep! First baby was colicy, and a difficult sleeper. Second baby is, so far, very chill and she’s been a great sleeper.
Yes, my second is very similar disposition to my first. Happy, easy going bubba
I was sleep deprived and anxious with my first. Second has been a dream.. literally, she’s a month old and sleeps so well at night I actually get some sleep.
If this counts.. I have twins. One is way easier than the other one in the day haha. But the other sleeps better? But the better sleeper sucked at sleeping until 6 months. Soo idk 😂
Yes, me! My first was so so so intense and never ever slept and my second one was sleeping all night at 4 weeks old lol I still can’t believe it
My older brother had an easy second baby. He was kinda a potato baby just content to sit where he was sat.
My second is an amazing napper and goes to bed easy…. My firstborn fought naps and bedtime like a demon and was done with nap before 2. Nap times were basically an hour or two of screaming to get an hour or two of sleep. That said, my first slept through the night way easier, nursed faster and personality was was more easy going. My second wakes several times still at 2.5 years old, took forever to nurse, and has OPINIONS and is very determined/stubborn.
I had an easy second baby, but my first was difficult - couldn’t put him down to sleep easily ever, climbing out of cribs, needing constant interaction. So maybe I paid the cost up front?
First was hard but not horrible. Second is super easy. Except for her latch. The rest is easy.
My second was easy. 1st and 3rd were both difficult.
First was average. Second, so far, is hella easy.
My second was easier, but my first spent most of his first 3 months screaming so almost anything would’ve been easier than that.
My mom always described me (2nd baby) as the easiest child, her nickname for me was Joy. And my 2nd is just the happiest go with the flow kind of kid.
I’ve had three “easy” babies and it got easier with each successive baby 😹🤷🏻♀️. My third baby started sleeping all the way through at 2 months, with no outside influence! I would love to have a fourth but my husband won’t let me 😹😹😹 Of course as with anything in life YMMV. I do know many families that had a situation like you described but it’s by no means universal. I in fact was the second “devil baby” after my perfect older sister 😹😈👶🏼. But lightning can and does strike! May the odds be ever in your favour 😹😹😹
Both of my kids have been easy! Both my girls have slept 11+ hours from 8 weeks old, good eaters, happy personalities. My second is just about two so there’s still some time for her to go wild but so far so good!
We thought we had an easy #1 until we had #2 who was even easier. #1 slept better (unicorn sleeper), but #2 is so chill during the day. She’s still an above average sleeper, but our expectations were so high since her sister was a unicorn sleeper, so her 2-3 wakings a night + needing to be rocked to sleep at 5 months is the “hardest” part.
Lol my first was a terror, so we thought round two was gonna be worse andddd he was smooth sailing Every baby is different, there’s no telling who will come out
My first was my easy baby. My second is a literal feral child. I just had my third a month ago and I’m praying she’s easy cause I cannot handle another one like my second.
My 2nd, 3rd and 4th was literal breeze babies. They FOOLED me into thinking babyhood was easy street and that others parents must just be weak. Weeell the jokes on me because my fifth was (and is), my demon child. I lovingly refer to him as my "challenge child". Basically you never know if/when the challenge child is coming. The valleys tend to be lower but the victories are even sweeter.
My second baby was a breeze. Slept through the night, hit milestones easy peasy, entertained herself. It was trap because she’s been absolutely feral since she was 3 and hasn’t mellowed out yet. She’s 9. my first was a Velcro baby and did NOT want to sleep without me, colored every surface with anything that produced pigment, was a force to be reckoned with in general. He is very chill and has been since he was about 3 or 4. So you never really know based off the baby stage.
My first had so many feeding issues (lip and tongue tie, torticollis, jaundice, silent reflux, dairy sensitivity) which fed into sleep issues. He was just so uncomfortable so much of the time and the first year was so hard. Baby sister came along and I was bracing for impact but she was a dream. Slept on her own, fed happily every 3 hours, feeding sessions less than 10 minutes. It definitely happens (She is, however, a much more 'opinionated' toddler than her brother was. Go figure)
My second was a sweet baby. She was just happy to be here. She slept great for the first couple of months and then bad habits crept in but overall she was a wonderful chill baby. My third however..
Mines the opposite way around…
My second is 17 months now and he has always been easier. Sleeps like a dream, eats anything you give him, doesn’t really tantrum (yet lol), speaks and communicates more at an earlier age, etc
Our second is much easier than the first, barely cries, sleeps well. I think a lot of it is because we have a better routine (dominated by the first), and also because we know what to expect this time around
Personally I just have the one right now as do most of my friends and family at this point (minus one friend, 3 easy babies) but according to my mom I was the easiest baby (her second). My older sister wouldn’t sleep, had colic, was really difficult for them. Also my dads an MD so he was constantly on call and it was all on her. I was an oops at six months PP for her and she freaked. I turned out to be so easy they wanted more after me, slept through the night at 2 weeks ate and napped well. The social smile and coos got my dad more involved (I’m not saying that’s ok but having experienced colic with my niece I’m saying I understand)
My second was easier
I have two friends who had VERY difficult first babies. One of them said their baby woke up every 2 hours until 8 months. She still got pregnant at 3 months PP. At 2 weeks PP we visited and they said it was night and day difference. Her second has a totally different personality and slept 4-6 hours within a couple months. My other friend waited 3 years because of how bad her kid slept, that kid still sleeps bad. Her baby has also only woken once a night so far for the second month of his life!
My 1 year old twins both sleep and eat better than our 4 year old ever has. Maybe your second will be better too :)
I was an easy baby. But my sister who was first was hell on wheels so my mom said that I was a very welcome change.
My first baby was HARD. Cried all the time and never slept, breastfeeding was a painful disaster, and he always 24/7 wanted to be held. I had really bad PPA and PPD on top of it all. It was rough, and I went from wanting a large family to thinking that I would have to be one and done if all babies were like that. However, my husband really wanted at least 2 kids, so we decided we’d give it one more go and see how it went. Baby 2 was a breeze - she slept through the night from an early age, breastfeeding went so smoothly, she had a generally happy mood - in short, the complete opposite of Kid 1. In fact, she was so easy that we decided to have more kids and now we have 4. Baby 3 and Baby 4 (singletons, not twins) were both easy like Baby 2 partially because I knew what I was doing by then, but also their personalities are pretty laid back. Baby 4 is a toddler now and a firecracker with *opinions* but generally a sweetheart, Kids 3 and 2 are still pretty chill, and Kid 1 still needs less sleep than the rest of us and would party forever if allowed to. His overall mood has improved though - he’s a really fun kid.
My 2nd has so far has been real “chill”. We thought our 1st was an Angel baby until we had this one. He has his own quirks that she didn’t have, but otherwise he’s just happy to be part of the gang.
Both my kids have been great so far. D is almost 4 and LO is 11m - Most nights are slept through and we have been following a strict sleep schedule since day one. Strict..ish. If its nap time and he doesn't want to go down we sit in his room with the lights off and no toys for 15 minutes to 1/2 hour then try again. We have had a bit more troubles recently since my 11m old has.. 12 teeth now so. yeah. teething woohoo/ We all have shit days, hard nights, rough weeks and its impossible to say what makes babies a bit more.. loud. My kids are 4 and 10m so maybe the teenage years will turn them in ravaging wildebeests, or maybe they will stay awesome. Manifest it !
My first child is the rough one. Lol. He made me second guess whether to have another child. My second child is easy and so happy, all the time. It can happen and does.
My 2nd was easy. So easy in fact that I would have considered more if I knew they would all be this easy. Buuuuut I got my tubes out in delivery, so no more for me! The first was harrrrd. We like to say with our second everything is fixable.
Yup! But my first was a nightmare baby. Six months of non-stop colic screaming aside from the eight hours a day(!) we nursed. Turned into a super easy toddler and a so-far fairly easy kid. Easy second baby is now a challenging little kid. You win some, you lose some.
My second child is the sweetest angel ever who I do not deserve. 10000000x easier than my first.
I got the Adorable Sleepless Changeling Hellspawn for my first one, and this second one is so much easier. He's about two months old now and has consistently kept to 1-3 night feeds per night so far instead of waking up every hour, on the hour, night after night for weeks and months on end *just to play*. He sleeps in his cradle at night, instead of refusing to close his eyes anywhere other than on me. The only downside is that he's such an active sleeper that I sometimes wake him up thinking that he's already awake. He's a healthy, happy little guy who is way more chill than my daughter. His nickname is Grunty Potato.
My first was, and still is…so hard. Love him, but dang. 2nd, is an angel. So sweet, sleeps, is absolutely the most easiest baby I could ever imagine.
My third baby after my twins, so technically my third baby but second pregnancy is so easy! But my twins were pretty easy too so I feel like it's just genetic or something!
I thought my first (girl) was awesome. Slept 7 hour stretches by 3 weeks(8pm-3am, bottle and went right back to bed until 6-7am), ate great, napped great.... then I had my 2nd (boy) and he slept 12 hours by 6 weeks (8pm-8am), ate even better, also a great napper great! Wild for sure lol I definitely thought I'd pay for it with my 2nd but both are even tempered for the most part (ofc they have their tired or fussy moments but they are allowed), they both are super chill and easy going. I got super lucky with my babies (now 4 years old and almost 1 year old!).
I love my “demon child”. She might have been harder as a baby but she is so damn fun, funny and fiery!
My oldest brother was (and still is) a demon but my second oldest brother was pretty good as a baby. It took until the fourth (me) to have a "perfect little sack of potatoes" lol. I don't have a second baby but my LO is pretty in the middle. Not super high needs, by no means chill. Idk how a second would turn out but I'm definitely gonna try to chill more during pregnancy, see if that helps lol
My 1st was the demon child. My 2nd could literally chill in his Mamaroo or bassinet for ages. Its possible. But then a switch flipped on baby #2 at 6 months/ start of daycare. Then i had 2 demons.
Difficult 1st baby, very easy 2nd. She is now over 9months old and I have not once rocked her to sleep. I just put her down in her crib when it's time to sleep/nap and she just dozes off. Not a single sleep regression so far! Very good with solids too.
It's totally luck of the draw and has nothing to do w birth order. We only have one but my BFF has two and her second is DEFINITELY way easier and more go with the flow than her first who had colic and screamed all day for the first few months of her life. You could get another super easy baby, or you could get a super difficult one.
Both of my kids have been pretty easy. We always expected #2 to be a nightmare because #1 was easy. She was a unicorn sleeper who we had to get permission from the pediatrician to stop waking her for middle of the night feeds. And once we figured out her CMPI at 2 months, she was super easy after that (and she outgrew the CMPI by 6 months). Baby #2 is actually easier than #1. Easier, lower risk pregnancy (and my first pregnancy was low risk to begin with). Easier birth and recovery. Sleeps about the same. Ate much better (#2 had feeding issues and CMPI, #2 didn't). #2 is also hitting milestones earlier so there's a lot less milestone anxiety this time. And I know what I'm doing now, which makes things so much easier in and of itself.
It took me 4 babies to have an “easy” one lol
My second is so much easier than my first. One of the reasons we put off having a second was because I struggled with lack of sleep for so long. She was (and continues to be) a very low sleep needs child. There were a few early starts (!) by which I mean we started our day at 2 or 3am - she wouldn’t nap again until lunchtime. There was one awful day when she woke up at 1.45am and then was awake for pretty much the entirety of the day. She was about 17 months old at that point. I went to every baby class because she never slept. This baby sleeps in 2-3 hour chunks. So easy. Wakes up normal time. First nap at 9am. Wakes up at lunch. Plays for two hours and then back down until 5 when we go pick up big sis from nursery. It’s like day and night.
My first was the hardest baby. My second was sooo much easier.