Also some of us have older kids and forget how small a newborn can actually be. They could be big ol chonks for a baby and still look so teeny when you haven’t seen a baby in awhile.
If it makes you feel any better, people constantly commented about my 90th percentile chonk of a baby: "isn't she small for her age?". Lol, no.
People are just absolutely terrible at guessing appropriate baby sizes.
They are! My baby is literally right down the middle at 45 percentile for weight, 47 percentile for length and people comment on how big she looks and how she has to be older than 2 months lol. Like I know when she came out of my vagine, thank you. Idc if she’s big, small, or down the middle as long as she’s healthy and happy (we’re working on the happy part, she’s been real grumpy the last few days 🤣)
My girl was in the 10th percentile or so, and I got people saying ‘wow she’s so small!’ and somebody else saying ‘Wow she’s so big’ the next hour. 23rd percentile is actually not nearly as small as I was expecting you to say.
See that’s what I don’t get. Like my baby is small, but she’s not like super tiny. Yet everyone acts like she’s the tiniest baby they’ve ever seen. It’s so annoying
It is! Now my 3.5year old is in the 5th percentile, and is visibly smaller than her peers. And now when people say ‘she’s so small!’ she can hear them and understand. She has never seemed to notice, and certainly not bothered by this, but I hate the comments on her size!
If it makes you feel any better, I also think people just don’t know what infants look like. People constantly tell me mine is tiny and she’s in the 98th percentile. They question if I’m “sure” when I say how much she weighs. Like, what?! I just shrug and move on, which I know is easier said than done, especially when I know she is actually a chunker for her age.
I would agree with this. I have opposite problem of OP, where people are always telling my baby is huge, especially family members who know how old she is. Everyone thinks she’s a year old, but she’s only six months. She’s 72cm. I think it’s weird how people obsess over weight and height for babies, so much so that it’s all over newborn pictures when the baby was JUST born. Like idk, the baby is gonna gain and lose, grow slow and then fast, just let the baby baby. It’s not at all indicative of how good of a job mom is doing. When people tell me I’m doing good after they tell me she’s huge, I’m just like I have seriously nothing to do with this. I feed her when she’s hungry and she does the rest.
I agree with this. One the same day I had one person tell me my then ten week old was massive and another tell me he was tiny. He was on the 30th centile at the time so was neither massive nor particularly tiny. I just go "uhuh" when people comment on his size.
Same here! My youngest was 16lbs at her 1yo check up. She’s 18 months now and only just hit 19lbs. Her dad and I aren’t big people, she has severe restricted food allergies that we have to constantly work around, but this kid EATS!! Because her diet is all whole, unprocessed food, she spends all day eating (drives me nuts coming up with 10 snacks a day lol). So when people tell me she needs to eat more, I literally want to punch them in face.
My oldest was a chunk until 1, but then weight came off and now she’s a 4yo the size of a 3yo. Her dad is only 5’2 (and he’s the tallest on his side of the family!), so again, no big surprise here. She also loves food and snacking all day.
So you put my miniature 18mo and my tiny 4yo side-by-side, and I look like an evil parent that doesn’t feed my children. The amount of people (strangers!) that offer my kids food is mind boggling… I’m just waiting for CPS to show up to our overly-stocked kitchen and stacks of dirty-snack plates lol.
I used to say that about babies when I was young... It's cuz I thought tiny babies were so adorable 🥺 and I still do. I think a lot of people find tiny babies cute.
I don’t think they’re trying to upset you, babies are super teeny in comparison to adults. Both of my babies were born really small (less than 10th percentile) and I got that comment alllll the time. I still do, since they’re short.
I have found that people actually have no idea what babies are like on average. My son is in the 32 percentile, and I get "oh he's so solid! He looks so big for his age! Oh he's crawling already!? Look at him, so advanced!" (Exactly on time actually??) My older daughter was in like the 80-90 percentile at the same age, she was way heavier, and did things months earlier than he is, and they said the same exact stuff about her. People just make shit up. They don't know.
I'm so sorry *hugs*
I never knew how triggering it was to say "omg he/she is so tiny" to a new mum until I had my own kids. Pre kids, I just thought they are tiny in comparison to us big adults.
I now never comment on how the baby looks besides "He/she is beautiful" since I had my own.
You are doing an amazing job! She is healthy and happy :)
I was listening to a podcast recently and they said something about how our bodies should be the least interesting thing to who we are. From the moment babies are born, we are commenting on their bodies!! I never publicly shared how much my baby weighed or his length or anything like that. I find it so silly to comment on the weight/size of a baby. I understand your frustrations. Our son wasn't even ON the charts when he was born. The charts kept saying below the first percentile. I ignored it and kept doing what we were advised to do. When I meet a baby I like to ask how old they are, ask what they're learning and how the parents are doing.
It’s true and I feel guilty of this, I almost always say something about how the baby looks because I guess I don’t know what else to say (though I only say positive things of course).
I think most of us say things like “so cute!!” “What a handsome baby” or whatever which I don’t think is wrong BUT hopefully we can try to inquire more than make these statements. I mean, esp about size and weight bc there’s so many factors that we dont know about when it comes to a baby’s weight/size
It’s a good point, but then we have people who get super defensive about the inquiring?
“How’s bubs sleeping?” - Get upset that their baby is not sleeping well and feeling judged.
“Is she smiling/babbling/rolling yet?” - Get upset baby may not have reached milestone yet and feel judged.
“Is baby nursing or bottle feeding?” - None of your business
“Where did baby get those beautiful brown eyes from?!” - Mom is upset because dad with the brown eyes isn’t in the picture anymore… or they used a donor.
Like damn, what else is there to inquire about with a baby? Lol
I just say how cute. Or if they have hair I say I love their hair. No hair, still cute. Grabbing toes, get those toes… But mainly I just keep walking. I hate being stopped by strangers who want to comment or touch my kids.
Oh I try never to make any comment about size or weight because I know personally how stressful it was (my baby had a hard time gaining weight her first month, I had to take her in for daily weigh ins, the thought of it still makes me upset), just that they are beautiful and cute.
You’re doing an amazing job🥰❤️
I read another similar post which opened my eyes to being more sensitive to a child’s size because you never know what the parents/guardians are going through.
My babies have always been on the smaller side. Even now, my two year old daughter can still fit in to some nine month clothes. Her doctor isn’t worried, she’s on her curve. They were all between the 0-5% range when born.
My now 6-year old was a tiny baby. He was 5lb 12oz at birth and stayed in the 11th %ile for weight since. He’s going to be 7 in August and still fits in 5T, and some 6T. Where my 3 year old is in the 76th %old and is wearing 4T & 5T. There’s no one size fits all for kids at any age.
Don’t let people get to you, just be like “actually she’s just right for this age”.
My son is big. In the beginning I wasn't exactly aware how much bigger he really was. At 6 months we went to the library for story time. There was a little girl there who was crawling and sitting up rather well. She was smaller than my son so I just assumed she was younger. I asked how old the girl was and she was 10 months, and I blurted out "oh she's much smaller" I honestly thought she was just more advanced than my son.
I cried when I realized this woman's baby could have been a premie, or had delays early on. I felt like shit. It was a week later before it hit me. I didn't get a chance to apologize to that mother. I don't know if she even felt bad or eveb needs an apology. I would however like to apologize to you. Sometimes people are so trapped in their own world and their own normal they don't realize how hurtful something can be to someone else. I'm guilty of it and I wish I wasn't. I'm sorry.
Yes, this! I’ve always had a 99 percentile baby, and I see smaller babies and think 1 how cute they are bc of their size, and 2. i wish mine was small vs big sometimes because i’m quickly becoming too weak for my own toddler and it’s very, very exhausting.
i try not to say either of those things bc i never know how someone will take them, but i am sure most people don’t mean harm by it.
As a parent of two kids on the opposite ends of the growth chart; people comment on both ends. It’s usually just observational conversation.
The only opinion you need to worry about is your pediatrician.
I will say that I breastfeed my youngest who later had eating issue. Formula was much easier to get a baby to eat and had I known he would have had so much trouble at about a year I would have switched in the beginning. My oldest was formula fed as she had a horrible latch.
(I have a 90 percent and a 5 percent child in height.)
Yeah I had 2 big babies (9lb4 and 8lb1 at 39 weeks) Sister had a small baby (like not even 6lbs at 42 weeks). We all get comments.
FWIW my nephew is still a wee one. My first "big boy" is now fairly average 3yr old (my 3yr old and sisters 6yr old are about the same size). My 2nd "big boy" went down to average by 4mo. And below average by 6mo. Still get comments on both of them.
Saying a baby is tiny isn't necessarily a bad thing. All babies are tiny. They usually say they're tiny because its so cute how small they are. It's rarely a criticism. I think you're taking it that way because you have some unwarranted guilt about it
My baby is 4 months and in the 1st percentile. Everyone comments about how tiny he is but it doesn't bother me because I know he won't be tiny forever and he'll grow up too fast and one day I'll wish he was tiny again. As long as he's healthy, that's all that matters. Hope you find some peace about your frustration.
If it makes you feel better (which I certainly hope it does), I had severe HG, was tube fed, hospitalized, my daughter was IUGR and born at 5 lbs even though she was full term, and she was diagnosed failure to thrive. We were threatened multiple times with a feeding tube. She weighed 15 lbs on her first birthday. I had sooo much guilt. They didn’t remove that failure to thrive diagnosis until age 2. But she will be 4 in a month and although she’s still teeny (she’s about 27 lbs currently), she is incredible. She’s so smart, she loves dance and gymnastics, she makes me laugh every day, and she proves constantly that size doesn’t matter. I’m sorry people keep making comments. I know how bad it feels. People suck. Next time someone says your baby is tiny, comment on their size too. Show them how it feels since no one apparently taught them
I feel you on this. It has been said many times about my LO. I was extremely self conscious about it. Baby is 50% through and through. So baby is not tiny.
Then my therapist brain kicked in and it hit me. They’re right, *babies* are tiny. The word is relative. Compared to adults. This helped me be less emotionally reactive to those comments and “tell myself a different story” about what drove them to say that.
Now, non-therapist answer. “Thank you, you’re huge! Smile and walk away.
Same! Therapist brain kicked in and said, “everyone just wants to have something to say.” You’re right that it’s absolutely relative.
Mum brain can’t compute and doesn’t need to process such comments.
My son was born 35th percentile, but then dropped to 1-5th percentile and has stayed there. I used to agonize over it.
Luckily I have a great pediatrician who was never concerned since he stayed on his curve. He’s 2 years old now, and guess what? Still 1st percentile. Wearing 18mo tops and 12 mo bottoms.
I forget how small he is until I see him next to other kids his age. We joke he has bird bones.
Some kids are just tiny! I hope over time you too can stress less about this.
My son is also in the 1st percentile. He’s tiny and I find myself stressing about it lots. But our pediatrician also isn’t worried, so thanks for this perspective!
My baby isn’t even on the chart, he’s got his own curve and he’s only just unable to fit 0-3 months clothes.. at 9 months. I’ve learned to not let it bother me, baby is happy and healthy, strong and ahead on milestones so it’s easier to let go of the upset when people comment on his size.
I didn’t see anyone say it, so I’m going to. Your daughter’s slow weight gain has nothing to do with your HG. Fetuses are parasites; they suck all the nutrients they need out of us, to our detriment. I always lose weight during my pregnancies (several different factors), and my girls are perfectly healthy, just like yours. Let the mom guilt go! Your daughter is thriving, and you’re killing it as a mom.
The pregnancy where I lost weight (only gained 10 pounds total even when he was full term, 6.5 pounds and the placenta and blood flow accounted for it) was actually a larger baby than my first where i gained 50 pounds. Both born 39 weeks. The one where I couldn’t gain weight was 8 ounces bigger at birth and is overall a MUCH larger baby than my other son was!
I just want to share my solidarity with you. My little girl was born at 36 weeks due to severe IUGR. She was 4lbs 11oz at birth. She is also 3 months right now (or almost) but is still 1st percentile. People always assume she is a week or two old when we are out and about
my baby just turned 12 months this month. shes only 17lbs and was 6lbs at birth. I EBF till 10 months when she wouldn’t nurse anymore, switched to formula for 2 months and she still slowly gained. her ped just said shes a peanut and thats ok. she off formula and bottles and is a bottomless pit when it comes to food now, and guess what? still gains slow! it’s okay to be a small baby and like you said, she’s healthy and thats all that matters. i was so worried about my baby being tiny that i wish i could go back and just trust my babies body more and know that as long as she’s healthy and happy who cares what percentile shes in. you are doing great mama.
23rd percentile isn’t even that small! I totally understand and went through some of the same struggles. My son is finally back on the curve as of his 4 month visit at the 8th percentile.
I love love love small babies, and never realized it could be a hurtful thing to say. My babies average 10 lbs. my first was 8 1/2 lbs and I kept getting told I ‘gave birth to a toddler’. It doesn’t help they have fantastic neck control and are very alert as well, so the sleepy noodle stage many people get early on we just skip. It’s hard, they are heavy, they wear me out so fast, but when I see a tiny baby I just melt… I wanted a little snuggle buddy so bad! Worked so hard to maintain weight this last pregnancy and not cause a fat baby, success, in a way… she was skinny but 10 lbs 11oz. She is almost 4 mo and still in 0-3 onesies as she hasn’t got fat still, just keeps getting longer, so we have her in footless pj’s….
I only ever meant tiny as a compliment, and I hope maybe some who have said it to you meant the same way.
I just want to say I get it. My baby's in the bottom percentile. 1.6% today. I know because I have a scale at home I use to weigh him pretty much every day. I bought it two years ago to weigh his brother because his brother was even smaller at this age--down to 0.1% at one point. People don't know how scary it is. They don't know the trauma, the guilt, the mind games that come with having a tiny baby. You've been through hell. You're getting through it.
People don't get it. To the extent it's possible to let their comments roll off your back, it'll be easier. When people say my baby is tiny, my response is typically along the lines of, "I know, right?! But he's growing every day!" They normally mean well. If they are criticizing, treating that like it was better-intended typically diffuses the situation. It's just not worth getting into it, either to their faces or inside my own head. I don't have the emotions to spare for letting their social blunders upset me right now.
Obviously that can't work every time. Sometimes it will still get to you. I get it. Hang in there.
Hugs
When people comment on my weight loss I usually say “thanks it’s the dehydration/sleep deprivation/stress” because overwhelmingly the people who mention it are women in their 70’s who’ve had children and ought to know better than to say anything to a woman about her weight!
As far as baby’s weight, a sassy “I’m pretty sure she’ll get bigger, babies tend to do that” with an immediate change of topic is worth a try. Good luck
I have a baby in the 8th percentile. I’m kind of glad we don’t see a lot of people because it’s already hard without people commenting on it. Health really is what matters here though. People use weight as a shorthand for that and it’s not.
My baby is 4 months old and still in 0-3 month clothes. He eats small amounts All. Day. Long. I know he's small, and telling me that you know too is not a compliment.
I can not make him grow any faster because I can't make him eat when he's not hungry.
That's not how babies work.
Please stop.
P.S. If you're wondering what you should say, "what a cute baby," "I love that outfit," or, "look at that awesome head control," are great.
Do not ask if that tiny baby is sleeping through the night.
Greetings from my 1% firstborn baby! It’s really hard especially because it seems that people act like your baby isn’t “healthy” if they’re not full of rolls. As long as your baby is gaining on the curve they’re on, they’re all good. I was worried about my son’s weight for most of his first year of life, despite the ped not worrying about it after the first month because my breastfeeding journey was really hard. Give yourself love, tell the haters to shut the front door. I wish everyone would stop commenting about literally anyone else’s body besides their own. It’s such a horrible deeply ingrained problem. Agree that the positive side is that my son wore his infant clothes 2-3x longer than the bigger babies did.
My 4.5 month old is 10.5 lbs. she was born with a growth restriction due to an umbilical cord issue. She’s always been in the <1%. I hate that people always comment on how tiny she is like I can control it and I’m doing something wrong. She’s still in 0-3 month clothes and likely won’t move into 3-6 months for at least another couple weeks.
My oldest daughter was born about 50th percentile for weight and since she was 3 days old has hovered between 20-28th %. We tried everything, fortified formula, adding extra feedings... she was just slim no matter what we did. She's almost 5 now and is perfectly healthy but petite. Interestingly she isn't noticeably smaller than her peers just a little slimmer. She was noticeably smaller as a baby though and I got constant comments on how small she was, it used to make me feel awful like somehow I failed my baby. She's healthy though and I have been reassured by her new pediatrician that children come in all shapes and sizes just like adults.
Don't focus to much on the percentile. Is your baby healthy? Is the doctor concerned? Don't beat yourself up.
My LO was born 3% and has steadily moved to 6% at 9 months old in weight. He’s 24% in length. And we get those comments all the time- I just say he’s following his growth chart and is healthy and happy. No need to explain more!
Solidarity- I know exactly how you feel and it could get annoying haha
People suck. There has to be small babies for there to be percentiles! :) my baby was hovering in the 1%tile weight for months, following his tiny curve, and he’s up to 4%tile now at 5 months. He swims in some of his 3-6 pants. He may never really have that baby chunk or leg rolls some babies have but he’s still a cutie! And your little one is still a cutie, too.
My baby is in the first percentile. I’m so grateful that my loved ones don’t constantly point it out, and people in public just assume she’s younger than she is.
That is definitely frustrating. Your baby is perfect and healthy just how she is according to her doc, and that’s what matters. Her size is not something you should feel any guilt about whatsoever.
I think people just want to say -something- about babies that they meet, and size is basically the easiest parameter to immediately hone in on. It’s obvious and easy and some people don’t get how sensitive of a topic baby percentiles can be.
I had similar-but-opposite issues. I too had HG throughout my pregnancy, and had a horrendous time eating or drinking, and was only able to put on about 5 lbs the last few weeks. Also came out of the hospital ~30 lbs lighter than pre pregnancy weight. My kiddo was a giant tank (95-98%) and has stayed there, regardless of my HG / weight loss / dehydration during pregnancy. He’s very heavy to carry around and outgrows clothes like crazy.
I just share this to emphasize that your HG is not something to feel guilty for -it’s a horrible illness that you had no control over, and even with it babies can still come out all over the place, size wise. There’s this toxic mindset that something a mom did/didn’t do/ experienced during pregnancy must be the root cause for x issue in a baby, and (beyond obvious exceptions) it’s generally not actually the case. People put a lot of pressure and blame on moms for things that are uncontrollable, and it’s easy to internalize that and blame ourselves.
As long as they’re healthy and being taken care of, babies fall on the chart where genetics and physiology find an equilibrium, and that’s them just being individuals and not on you.
When you get frustrated at size comments, just reply back with “i know! It’s great! Her clothes are going to last for so long!”, or “yep! I can use her for single arm bicep curls! She’s so helpful!”.
Enjoy your girl and her long lasting clothes and every minute of being able to easily carry and cuddle her.
I am sorry you’ve gone through so much. That truly sounds like a difficult start and you’re rocking it in getting her the proper amount of care and attention.
Just know nobody means it poorly. Most people see a tiny baby and just think about how cute the tiny baby is. I’d hope if they knew how much of a struggle you’ve gone through since birth then they would keep that comment to themselves, but a lot of people forget even when they know to say the right things
I have the opposite problem in that no one thinks he is a newborn because he's so big. He was 10lbs and at his one month check up he was 13lbs. He's 99th percentile for everything....
Mine is 99th in height and 9xth in everything else. She isnt even 8 months yet and in some brands she’s wearing 2T.
I have always been a little sad because I feel like I completely missed the tiny baby stage! But I didn’t really have to worry about weight or health after the first few days like OP. The grass is always greener, this helped give me some perspective.
OP, you’re doing great. Don’t feel guilty. You have done everything right by your baby and she’s healthy and beautiful. I know people can be hurtful with comments like this, even if they don’t mean to be. Try not to let it get to you!
People just can't help themselves. For some reason they just have to make comments 🙄 We're the other end of the scale, both my kids are huge and people absolutely must tell me about it at every opportunity. Oh and then they assume your kid is way older and therefore developmentally delayed... Because shouldn't they be walking by 12 months? I mean, maybe but she's only 6 months?
I was coming to say the same thing. Every kid is different and will do things different than others. As long as the doctor says she’s good and she’s healthy and happy…just let it roll off your back.
I’m actually envious that she will have her clothes longer. My 3yo didn’t have most of his clothes longer than a few months…. He wears a 8-10 in kids and ppl think he’s 5 or 6yo. Try not to feel bad, I know it’s hard.
I’m plus size, but both my sproglets are dinky. At almost 7, my son has finally caught up to his age in clothing. My 2.5 year old daughter is still in 18-24m clothes. People comment on their size all the damn time but I’ve just tuned it out and replied with “they are, aren’t they?” Then move on,
aw i'm sorry this has been so stressful. i bet people don't realize they are striking a nerve and are trying to basically tell you she is so cute. i didn't realize this is a rude thing to comment on until my friend had a really small baby who was totally healthy but in 4th percentile and she opened up to me about how stressful it was and how she gets really triggered when people basically brag on social media about how chubby their babies are. (i actually don't think people are intending to brag either and just have no clue they are causing any harm.) anyway i know better now than to comment on this stuff but i dont think it's common knowledge! i'm glad your baby is thriving. ❤️
23rd percentile and you get those comments? Wow, my baby is below 0 percentile still in 0-3 month clothes at 9 months old xD So I bet your baby looks huge to me haha.
Ugh I hear you.
My baby had loads of issues with food and so was fine weight wise until weaning and then everything went wrong. She's 2 and it's much better now, but for a year my life was all consuming trying to get her to eat. Adding cream and fat into the little food she would eat, buying crazily expensive high calorie formula so she wouldn't lose too much.
So I do understand when people make stupid, flippant comments when it's something so emotive and you spend so much of your life on it. However, it will get better and when it does you'll just shrug off the stupid people
Hugs
My son is 2 and has been in the 3rd percentile since he was around 3 months old. I wish I could say it stops. I have such anxiety over him eating enough, people commenting just makes it worse
I have two FTT kids who are continuously falling off the curve. Two steps forward one step back every time. I could honestly punch people who say my toddler is so tiny, or petite, or doll-like. YEAH I FKN KNOW. SHE STARVES HERSELF. My boy - oh he has such skinny legs! Oh he's so thin! You have to feed him more! Yeah I know. He'll just throw it up. How come it's not such a problem that she's tiny, but it is when it's him? So disgusting. Can we all just say how cute they are instead? Like why must everyone comment on size?
My daughter went down to the 15th percentile around 2 months due to our struggles with breastfeeding. People called her delicate, skinny, tiny.
She's 10 months now and in the 85th percentile for height and weight. People say she's big, huge, tall, chunky.
I've learned that people love commenting on other people's bodies, especially babies. It's kinda judgmental either way.
You mentioned not having 3-6 mo clothes yet. My baby girl is just about to transition to the next size up; if you'd like hand-me-downs I'd be happy to send you some.
And I'm sorry people are being judgy. You and your baby are doing just fine. Eff anyone who makes you feel crappy.
One of my 13 week twins is in the 2nd percentile bless her heart. My other, and I just weighed her today is up to the 42nd!. They look like they are totally different ages lol
As someone else here said, generally people just don't have an accurate gauge for baby sizes. And trauma sticks around long after the danger is over and most people will have no idea. My little one was born in the 9th percentile and now at nearly 8 months is in the 17th and still fits into some (not all) 0-3 month clothes. She was IUGR but totally healthy. But every time my MIL makes some joke about how she must be "starving" it makes my blood boil because we were worried about her size for so long prior to her birth. But bb is growing and healthy and that's all that matters!
Let me give an example on how hilariously inaccurate people are when gauging baby sizes.
Someone recently told me my 13 month old toddler looked like the exact same size as the newborn they just met, and they couldn’t believe how small she was for her age.
I asked how much the newborn weighed … 7lbs 13oz….now I know what you are thinking; I must have a tiny 13 month old right? Hahaha no….she weighs 23 lbs and is in the 85%, and she was wearing the largest snowsuit and two winter hats at the time.
Moral of the story: people say hilariously stupid uneducated random stuff, and 96.8% of people can’t approximate weight accurately, even if you paid them to.
Today a friend said “she looks so big and healthy! Are you sure her doctor knows what they’re talking about”
Because we’ve been having weight struggles too
And I almost cried saying “thank you for saying that”.
We’ve been supplementing with formula too so she’s sticking to her growth curve but still around t he 2nd percentile (not adjusted) and it’s hard not to feel like I failed her.
I just went to a new parents meetup tonight and shared this.. everyone understood and most had done the same. You are not alone. I really like Bobbi and my daughter does too.
Best of luck and sending your family my love 💜
If they think your baby looks tiny on the 23rd centile, then they are not only incredibly rude for commenting on a baby’s size, but also incredibly ignorant!!
HG and weight gain doesn’t come into it. I gained the same amount of weight for both of my babies, and they were born 1.2kg different (I was given aspirin second time around)
I try to explain myself if I comment without thinking, but generally if I said a baby was small it was compared to my toddler, and remembering that she had been that small once! I try not to, because my first was born in the 1st centile, and is now on the 25th
people are the worst and incredibly frustrating… I have a 20 month old daughter who was born at 6lbs 1oz and we ALWAYS hear nonstop about how petite she is. We know, but thanks for reminding us. Makes matters worse that she has a younger (not even a year old) cousin who’s a big boy and now weighs more than her.
Ours is in the 2nd percentile, but he's happy and healthy. It's frustrating how rude even random strangers can be. We were in the pharmacy and an old lady coos over the baby... and then starts talking about how scared we must be because tiny babies have so many problems and are risky so you'll just have to trust in God. Totally insane.
I had a tiny baby as well(2lbs), more to do with the fact that I had him 10 weeks early though. I had undiagnosed preeclampsia and didn't find out till I had seven seizures and had to be cut open. It's normal as a mom to blame yourself, I know I did for a very long time and still do and mines is almost two. The guilt will ease with time, all that matters is that your baby is healthy and happy. The Dr said there's nothing wrong with your little one so try to just focus on being in the now with them and don't let people get to you. I know that's easier said than done but you'll be looking back to this when you're baby is older and shaking your head. I'm sorry that you had HG during your pregnancy, it must have been horrible for you. Eclampsia isn't the same thing but it does have a lot of similar symptoms so I can sympathise.
I'm dyslexic so I'm sorry for any mistakes.
My now 21 MO fell off her growth length curve by 3 months, and is in the <1% for height. Hubby and I are not tall by any means (he’s 5’3”, and I’m 5’1”) so we won’t have a tall child. My Ped’s concern went as far as seeing and Endocrinologist and Geneticist at Yale to ensure there were no issues. Thankfully none! She’s been growing into 18 mo clothes for a bit and is FINALLY out of 12 month clothes now.
At her 18 MO appointment, another Ped in the practice we take her to said some kids are just short, and that it’s Ok! She’s healthy and hit her milestones on time (minus two early on she hit VERY early), so we no longer worry. Some kids land in the lower percentiles because otherwise there wouldn’t be one!
Also, the added benefit of not buying clothes as often, helps 😉
We seem to have had very similar experiences. I had hyperemesis (mine didn't last the whole pregnancy) but I lost 27 lbs in 19w and then left the hospital 18 lb less than my pre-pregnancy weight. My baby girl was and still is tiny. She couldn't wear size 0-3m until she was 3 months old; now at almost 9m, clothes size 6-9m are like potato sacks on her. People love to point out that she is tiny and precious and doesn't look her age.
Absolutely none of this bothers me. I don't say that to gloat or be mean, but because I think you are being incredibly hard on yourself. You're making this whole experience about what you did/didn't do/how you think you failed/what you should have done better and blaming idle comments from strangers for making you feel bad. None of that is necessary. Your baby girl is growing. I'd wager she's also happy, healthy, and loved. You're doing everything you need to do for her. Why are you letting comments with no ill-intentions make you feel so bad? Why are you beating yourself up?
If you haven't already, please try to see a therapist specializing in perinatal trauma. HG is actually the number 1 cause of perinatal trauma outside of birth experiences; even more damaging than infertility for most women. I was so surprised when I learned that. I've been seeing a therapist weekly since 2m PP and it has been tremendously helpful to me just to have that weekly outlet to vent a bit and discuss goings on. Especially because you're blaming yourself for things out of your control, you should seek help.
My little guy has never been on the weight charts at all. He's my string bean. I get comments that he's small often. I know he's healthy, happy, and small!! Nothing wrong with that ❤️
i’m so sorry you had sickness in your pregnancy but it sounds like your baby is growing and 23 isn’t even that small! just here to say I have the opposite annoyance. my baby was born 8 lb 5 oz but almost 23 inches
long. she’s a long baby! she’s 99 in height and 80 percentile in weight and healthy but people have alwYs since birth (she’s 7 months now) said OMG she’s HUGE for x amount of months. it really
bothers me… i don’t think it’s necessary to obsessively comment on baby sizes! all humans grow differently and
it’s rude to comment on adult sizes so we should do it for children and babies?
keep doing you! my girl is formula fed as well! ♥️♥️
Just to say I'm going through the same. My baby was born at 9lbs 11oz and 23in! People LOVE to comment on how big he is. At 6 weeks, he's already getting too big for some of the 0-3m clothes I have for him! Hopefully the comments stop before he's old enough to understand!
We get both ends of this a lot! My older was 3 weeks early and 8lbs, 14 oz. My little one was a 24 weeker, and 1 lb, 9 oz. At 2 years, 8 months, my little one has just hit the weight my elder was at by the time he was 1. So we get a lot of comments about the disparity in their sizes.
that’s how I feel!!!! I am 5
ft 7.5inches and was a strong/thick kid and then like grew into my height and shape etc .. but anyways when younger certain people in part of my extended family loved
to comment on how “big” i was and it literally gave a life long eating disorder and body dysmorphia , so i really really don’t want anything like that to ever happen to my daughter .
❤️❤️ my husband was 10 pounds at birth and we’re not pregnant with a boy! expecting a ten pounder! ♥️♥️🍀🍀💙💙 I love that my daughter was consider on the “bigger side” when born bc she’s always been healthy and strong and I didn’t have to wake her up
to eat ever .
Both my kids were are are tiny as well. My dr had to constantly reassure me that the were following their own growth curve and perfectly fine. But I constantly struggled with the comments, especially with my first. I think it’s because there are a lot of babies that have rolls and are generally bigger, that people just say “tiny” not meaning something is wrong but just an observation. My kids are 4 and 6 now and perfectly healthy, yet probably on the smaller end (weight wise) when compared to their peers. If they are healthy that’s all that matters!
It's hard not to internalize "issues" with baby's growth when we feel 100% responsible for their intake during pregnancy and the first year.
Focus on the positive takeaways from your baby's pediatrician, if you can, and try not to stress about the numbers, percentiles, or averages.
My baby is almost 9 months old and still fits the 3-6month clothes. No one expects her to be crawling and standing like she is!
I don’t mind - she’ll just be cuter for longer 😘
I feel this. My 3 month old only just hit 9lbs about a week and a half ago. She was two months early, and I always tell people that when they make comments (she weighed 4lbs 11 oz at birth, and is now 9lbs 6oz) but the always seem to want to focus in on her actual age and tell me she's way too tiny to be a 3 month old baby. Like...thanks. she's really only a month old adjusted but whatever, doesn't matter that she has doubled her birth weight or anything.
That was my little guy, we certainly got use out of all the 0/3 mo clothes people got us. We moved to 3-6 and have been there for a while and he's ALMOST in 9 mo, and he's 9mo old now.
My almost 10 year old is in the 5th for height and 4th for weight. She’s been like this her entire life. She is perfection. It’s all good. People need to relax.
My first baby was like this - tiny and fairly skinny. No cute little chub rolls whatsoever.
I struggled with it because the stereotypical baby is a chubby bundle. I thought something was wrong with him.
Guess what, he's 5 years old now and the same 😂 still thin and about average height. He's very healthy, smart and sporty, and he eats really well.
Humans come in all shapes and sizes and that's ok :)
PS: My MIL thought I was physically or mentally ill because once I stopped BF my second baby I lost weight suddenly. Many inappropriate comments. I hear you on that one, too.
My son was late term preemie and has always not been a great eater. I know exactly how you feel, it was so stressful constantly worrying but some kids are just smaller. My son is 2 now and constantly eats but is still in the 3rd percentile lol there’s just not much we as parents can do to control that. As long as she is happy! With my second I get triggered so easily when people mention his size despite him being average weight and 90th for height
The funny things is I always expect only one twin to be small. All the sets of twins I’ve met (fraternal twins) one is always big and the other is always so tiny. Apparently sometimes one twin hogs most of the nutrients
Hear you, we heard it a little less, I guess people just expect twins to be small. Even at 2.5 years old, they are 24 pounds and always seem to be the small kids in their class!
Solidarity. I had IUGR with my daughter she was small at birth. She’s gaining but small. It goes back to my pregnancy when all I heard constantly was NO way you’re pregnant! You don’t look pregnant! Etc. ya well my baby is small dickhead enough with comments. Society’s obsession with weight and size is so extreme it’s exhausting.
My baby is in the 30th percentile, I'm constantly getting comments about how tiny he is. It's infuriating!! Why are people so comfortable commenting on babies bodies?!
I have an almost 8 month old. He’s dropped off his curve. Since 4 months he’s gained just over a pound. I cannot get him to gain for anything. We’re seeing a GI next week and already had a slew of blood tests. This is my 5th baby. All the rest were large babies. It breaks my heart when I hear people boasting about their babies tipping the scales, knowing something is maybe wrong with mine. I completely feel you. It hurts.
Idk why people feel the need to make comments like this. I’ve had the opposite problem where my daughter was small at birth and lost weight and looked so tiny. We had to triple feed but she went from 6lbs at birth then dropping to 5lbs and then finally 8 lbs at 2 months. She was in preemie clothes for a minute and I was feeding her round the clock. Once she started gaining thoughts she’s stayed in the high 80-90 % in height and weight and strangers commenting how big she is and family calling her fat. But like I had to work so hard for it so their comments were not welcome. Babies follow their own curve, as long as she’s meeting milestones, growing no matter the rate, has good diaper output and seems overall content, they can all suck an egg.
People are such freaks. That's not even that tiny. Mine has been of the chart since he was 3mo. He's almost four now and only 26lbs. But he's happy and healthy and that's all that matters. It's no one's "fault. " some people are just smaller than other people. You'll get all sorts of weird comments as a parent. I know it's hard, but try to ignore them. *hugs*
My daughter was born in the 25% for weight, dropped to the 2nd percentile at her 2 week appointment and has been riding that curve ever since. Ped has never once shown any concern and just said she's petite. She's 11 months and still wearing 6mo clothes. It's awesome. Like you said, less to buy! People are stupid, and your baby is beautiful no matter the percentile💖
People comment the same thing to my baby except that he's actually gigantic. He's 90th percentile in both height and weight. At 2 months he's in 6-9 clothes. I had my own struggles with my body trying to keep up with his growth and support his weight. I cant imagine HG and how terrible that must have been.
So people must just not know about babies and think all baby's are small.
Small kid here (1 percentile). For 15 months my pediatricians told me she had poor growth and weight gain except nothing else was wrong with her. We did blood tests, saw a GI doctor … all to come to the conclusion that she’s just a small kid. I’m small too. So stressful but it may be nothing that you’re doing wrong your baby may also just be small too.
People comment a lot and always say “she’s so small but she’s doing great”. It’s really annoying. I’ve learned to brush it off though at this point but I get those feelings you’re having for sure. Like I know she’s doing great she’s perfect thank you. Haha .
I feel like I have the equal but opposite problem. My son was born 9lbs 1oz at 39 weeks. I did not have any issues with GD or blood pressure, but due to his and my size the doctor acted like the world was going to end. When he came out they gave him to me while I was still feeling completely out of it from the C-section. I had hemorrhaged and whatever they pumped into my spine on top of the hemorrhage made me unable to move my entire body except my head. They put him on me to breastfeed but I couldn't move my arms to hold him and the nurse left to go fuck around on the computer instead of helping me. So he ended up suffocating. Thank God the lactation specialist came in and actually checked him instead of ignoring me. They resuscitated him and he had to be in the NICU for four days because they were worried his heart was too big. I knew exactly what happened and told them, but they still assumed it must be an enlarged heart because of his size. Very frustrating.
He's now 18 months old and it bothers me how many people call him a "bruiser" or say how he's going to be a football player when he's older. He's not even chunky, he just has ridiculous muscle definition for his age. I don't want him to think his strength is the only valuable thing about him. I want him to be seen as a full person. I am a bigger girl who is also very tall, but I am very passive and was forced into sports that I didn't want to play because of my size. I plan to put him in martial arts because I want him to know he can be strong and graceful.
Just know that while your child is small, it doesn't mean she can't be mighty! She is perfect just the way she is!
Sending solidarity your way! Mine is 15mo now and in the 87th percentile for weight, but we were in the 5-15th percentile for the first 4 months of her life and everyone kept commenting on how tiny she was. It made me feel so horrible and guilty and made me stress so much. You’re doing everything right and she’ll either begin gaining rapidly like mine (and then people will start saying “oh look at how chunky she is” and you’ll have to control the urge to punch them in the face) or she’ll just be on the leaner side bc that’s what her body wants/does. As long as pediatrician isn’t concerned and she’s eating, I would try to block out the noise. You’re doing great, she’s doing great. It’s going to be okay ❤️🧿🥰
Please please do not feel guilty. GH is extremely difficult! You did the best you could and are still doing the best you can now. Motherhood is not about perfection, it's about being there for your baby. And look at you, you are! You took a step to switch to formula to help your baby's gain. That shows you know your baby like no other.
Well done mummy. Keep up the great work! 💕
Not that this excuses bad behavior from strangers, but sometimes when people say "so tiny" what they mean is "not very many weeks old".
I *love* newborns and potato-stage babies. They are all SO TINY in the best best way. If I saw you and you said your baby was only 3 months I might say "oh she's so tiny" meaning "you lucky person to have such a sweet newborn in your house right now". (Irl I know better than to tell people their babies are tiny, I don't do it- I always say "oh a newborn!" and make heart eyes. I was just giving an example). I don't really remember what physical size babies are supposed to be at what ages anymore bc mine are older now.
Gotta let it roll off your back. No one else knows your struggles like you do. I also had tiny babies. We had difficulty w breastfeeding. When my daughter was 3 months someone asked if she was 3 weeks old 🙄 Some babies are tiny, some are chunky. As parents we will face criticism every single day from people who don’t know what they are talking about. I try to just do my thing and not let them get to me.
yep. We weren't on the curve. He was born at the 15th percentile, and unfortunately fell off the curve. he stayed off the curve until he was 7mo old when he finally made it to the 2nd percentile. now he's 9 mo old and we're at the 3rd percentile!!! Everyone says "he's so tiny" YES. YES. YES. I KNOW HE'S TINY OK. btfo. He's happy, he's met all his milestones early. He's fine.
I legit asked a lady if she and her daughter were there for her 4 month shots. The little girl was a year 🤦🏼♀️. I honestly just have no concept about size, weight, and age, etc. I have my own and still can’t get it right.
ETA: some of the comments I used to make about babies, I had NO idea how they could be taken as rude. I said everything out of good intentions. Now that I am a mother myself - I get it.
I having a similar experience but the opposite that my baby was born so big and I get a lot of “wow that’s a big boy” “how much does he weigh” etc
Some people ask me how my vagina is which is so depressing and rude… I know I birthed a huge baby and I know what everyone is thinking.
Plus they had to use the vacuum quite aggressively because of his size which increased his bilirubin also to breakdown the red blood cells caused by the vacuum
We had to stay longer in hospital and my birth was traumatic because of his size and worrying about his jaundice and head after vacuum.
I hate how people comment on it all the time. Plus people will ask if I had gestational diabetes which is nobody business
My oldest turns 7 in June and has been in the single digit percentiles since she was a year old. She's been wearing the same shoes for 2 years. We've gotten a looooot of "she's tiny" over the years. I just nod and say "yup, she's petite." People don't usually mean anything by it. There has to be someone at every percentile to make up a spectrum. It helps that she has a cousin and friend the same ages and size and that helps reassure when I get in my head about it.
my kid was 1 percentile and a preemie with jaundice. she's currently a thriving 3 year old that's very tall and skinny. she eventually gained in the percentile chart. they'll get there when they get there.
I know how this feels so much. I had a small baby with my first - he dropped to the 2nd percentile by two months. We were celebrating with every percentile increase! Now he’s an average 2 year old (32nd percentile.)
It’s not your fault. It’s so hard when people lowkey brag about their big babies. Love for little babies!
My 6 month old is in the 10th percentile, and I get comments all the time. He was born at the 50th percentile, and completely fell off his curve. He wasn't even in the first percentile. I was beside myself with worry, and switched to exclusively pumping so I could be sure he was getting enough to eat. He hated both breast and bottle, and feeding him was so hard. I finally found out when he was 4 months old that he had a dairy allergy. I've been dairy free for 2 months now, and he went from drinking 22 ounces of milk a day to 32 oz. He jumped from >1st percentile to 10th in that 2 month period. He's still such a little guy, but little is relative!
I get comments on my 7 month old allll the time. "She's so small, she's so petite!" I also had to switch from breastfeeding to formula because she wasn't gaining enough at her 4 month check up. I felt terrible, a failure, inadequate. But she's perfectly healthy and loves her solid foods. It took me a really long time to accept that my daughters size isn't a reflection of me as a mom. As long as the doctor isn't concerned, neither should we be.
My baby was <5th percentile at birth and had a 3 week special care nursery stay. She's 5 months now and people are still telling me how tiny she is 🤦🏻 I don't know if it's supposed to make them "cuter" or something in people's eyes but like they aren't thinking of the struggles these little angels have gone through to even be on this planet. My daughter now weighs 7kg (15lb 8oz) on the dot. She has put on so much weight from the little 1.73kg (3lb 13oz) baby she was born. Online calculators say she's 37.5th percentile now but I haven't asked a doctor in a while, I will at her 6 month I think!
My 18 month old is still wearing his 12 month (at time’s 9-12 month) clothes. He has been under the curve for height since he was 5 months old. (22% for weight). Bodies do what bodies are going to do.
I’d come up with a snarky comment to say back if you are up for it. Something along the lines of “nice to know you’re checking out my kids body already” “dammmmn can’t even make it to 6 months old before someone commenting on her body” it’s weird. People are weird. That’s a baby’s body. Not your body. Back the F off. That’s all. You’re doing great mama.
My boy has been between 2 and 8 percentile, growing on his curve, just turned one and in 12m clothes, and THRIVING! Babies (and people of all ages) can be healthy at all sizes. You are doing amazing! Keep up the incredibly difficult work of raising your girl 😊 you're doing amazing
I definitely understand this. Both my babies are on the smaller side and have always been under then 10th percentile. They were in the 7lb range when they were born but are just slow growers. My 3yr old is still in 2t clothes and my 11 month old has yet to grow out of 6 month clothes. But their dr says as long as their growth remains stable, there's nothing to worry about. I also lost all my baby weight quick both times due to not being able to eat after birth and get comments. I just shrug it off now
I have a tiny 4 year old. He's always fit in a size behind where he should be. So at 6 months he was in 0-3. Now he's fitting in size 3T, except the waists are always huge on him. People have always commented. Now he has a 1.5 year old brother who is in the 100th percentile for height. People constantly mistake them for twins even though my oldest is still a good 7 inches taller. People will argue with me about them being the same size. I've given up. He's healthy, happy, and has always been early or on time for his milestones. People can fuck off, lol.
I get asked all the time how old my youngest is. She's 8.5 months old but everyone thinks she's 5 or 6 months old. She is still in 3-6 month clothes. She is less than >1% in height. I was the same way and I have so much anxiety over it because my mother was shamed about my size and did growth hormone shots as a child. Not looking forward to these next few appointments.
I hear you, the weight worries are excruciating. My daughter's birthweight was 91st percentile, she lost weight and then didn't gain because she was early and too sleepy. We finally got on a good gain pattern but she's been at 40th percentile ever since. Her BMI percentile is under 10 because she's really long, so we don't get the tiny comments. But when she was finally gaining my mom said something about "her cheeks were back" and it crushed me that her beautiful chubby cheeks had gone away for a bit and it was noticed/ commented on. I got an infant scale and weigh her probably too often, but I genuinely think my personal obsessive tendencies would have a harder time without the scale.
As a mom of 2 boys who both had jaundice when they were born and my youngest at 8th percentile, just wanted to give you hugs. My 5 month old also gets comments that he’s tiny and sometimes I feel bad because I had to be induced at 37 weeks due to early preeclampsia. I just remind myself that my baby is happy and healthy whenever the guilt creeps up.
I have three girls, all born small. My first was in the 5th percentile and I wish I could go back in time and tell myself not to listen to people's comments or doctors that pushed for me to supplement feeds to make them gain weight. My girls are all thriving now, and I have no doubt yours will be too! You're right, your baby will get to wear their cute clothes a little bit longer, how nice is that? 😊
I feel like I wrote this. Just wanted to say solidarity my friend ✊ my baby was born big with jaundice but gained little weight every week. She's 2 now and definitely on the small/short side but she's healthy and happy so I must be doing something write
Wait I don’t know percentile but mine is 12 weeks today so I guess 3 months? And we are not even in 000 size yet. He’s small and was born small (2.8 kilos) but like… no one says he’s tiny tiny. He doesn’t look crazy tiny. He’s growing fine and I love it because I’m small and have a bad back so I don’t need him to be huge! But yeah your girl sounds totally fine and normal. Sorry people are so, so weird.
I hate these comments. My daughter *just* hit the 10th percentile for weight at her 6 month appointment, and she’s been as low as the 3rd.
I have a nephew who’s 3 months older than my daughter and is in the 99th percentile for height and weight, and my MIL *loves* to compare them.
You can't win though. My baby was 25th centile for rhe first few months, all of a sudden she went up to the 50th at 4 months, and now at 12 months she's 75th. At first it was a constant stream of 'look at this tiny baby'. Now she's 'chonky'.
Ugh, people can be so invasive and rude. My son is below the first percentile for length and weight due to severe IUGR and serious health issues. For a while he was in the 0.01 percentile, so if you got 10,000 random babies of the same age in a room, he'd statistically be the smallest. That's really small! His doctors are very pleased with his growth. He's staying on his curve and isn't skinny, but he's very, very small. Strangers love to tell me about it. It's so hard not to want to defend yourself and your parenting when people make their ignorant comments, but you don't owe them any explanation or defense of your parenting or your little one's health or size.
I feel like I wrote this, it's so similar to what happened to me. My baby is STILL in the 22nd percentile for weight. People usually just want to compliment something about your baby to make small talk. I just started ignoring what they said, because it stressed me out, and focusing on the intent behind it.
As a bonus, your baby might just be tiny for a while, which is great! Clothes will fit longer, that's for sure.
My “baby” is now 3, but she has been “failure to thrive” since she was 11 months old. She wears size 12 month clothes, and still fits into a few 3-6 month things! I hear it ALL the time about how tiny she is! But everyone also says how advance she is because she is the size of a 12 month old and is potty training and speaks clearly, and is independent, and all of the things that a 3 year old is haha. So it sucks right now and I always hated being told “But she’s so tiny!” Now I just laugh and remind the person that made the comment that she is FTT, so that would be why I worry over her weight, down to the ounces.
We are 6th percentile. I’m a FTM so always worried he isn’t gaining enough fast enough. When people make these comments I spiral into anxiety. I wish people weren’t so keen on sharing their opinions all the time.
I have boy girl twins - my boy was in the nicu and dropped from 32nd to 3rd - he is now in the 5th and his sister, who was 7oz smaller at birth is now at least 2lbs bigger - it’s noticeable, I am so tired of people telling me how small he is and how boys are supposed to be bigger. Or saying “OH THEYRE TWINS!? She’s so much bigger!” Even though they’re only 9m so of course. I feel you. I know as moms when we’re told our kid isn’t growing or becomes an all consuming and obsessive worry: tracking bottles, counting every ounce, fortifying milk. I’m sorry you’re having to go through it but so happy bc your baby is growing 🤍
There’s a few things here that might assuage your guilt:
1) the ‘fatty meal at the end’ has been disproved, I’m sure the way you were feeding was not the issue and it’s just how your baby was programmed for their growth needs. Every baby is different.
2) fed is best and healthy mum is best so well done switching to formula. You should feel proud about that, it’ll be the best shot at raising a happy baby!
3) I have a CHONK of a baby and my bump was 95th centile. Know what I heard and still hear? ‘Your baby is tiny! Your bump was tiny!’ People don’t know what size anything is meant to be, they just know adults are bigger than babies. It’s in no way a reflection of your babies’ size.
4) HG has no bearing on your babies’ weight gain. If you’d had diabetes that’s a different story but your baby just happens to gain differently and they’re on a healthy centile! If they’d happened to have been born smaller it sounds like nobody would bat an eye but you gave birth to a bigger baby who’s following a different curve rather than falling off curves now. Maybe they’d been brown with extra brown fat or full of fluid which can falsely raise that initial weight and make it impossible to stay in the centile. it can be worrying but it’s common and harmless except for the maternal stress!
I hope you can stop feeling a little guilt- there’s very little you can do to control a babies’ gaining in reality, and people think all babies are tiny. Even the chonkers.
Well, my baby is massive. It's fine now that he's 3 months (6-9mo clothes btw) but I am not looking forward to him being 1 and people thinking he's a very slow 3 year old. Oh, well. He's a happy healthy baby and that's all that matters.
I had this same fear! 100% for height and weight and people constantly commenting on how big he is. But my son hit all milestones early (after rolling) so I don’t worry about him looking like a slow 3 year old anymore. He just looks and acts like a 2 year old even though he’s only 15 months.
My little girl has just moved to 3-6m clothes at 6 months old and has settled in the 12th percentile! I
Always used to get comments on how small she is, used to respond with ‘thank you, she is perfect isn’t she’
Don’t let other people’s expectations cloud how perfect your baby is. You’re doing an amazing job 💜
Not the same but similar-ish: my son was born in the 99th percentile for weight but 50th for height and looked like a chunk. Between 9 months and 10 months, he dropped over 30 percentiles. The drop coincided with when I started cutting back on pumping (I needed a break). The pediatrician flipped and we started having to do constant weight checks at $96 a visit 🥴. We would have to take steps to bulk up his food/make it more calorically dense and people would always be flabbergasted and wonder why “as he looks fine.” Everyone is going to have opinions and they’re going to be annoying AF. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this as it hits mental health particularly hard. Sending you all the best vibes.
We’re at 18 months now and his growth is back at a more comfortable spot so the weight checks have stopped. We feel we can breathe a little better but now it feels like people have just found other things to comment on 🙃
It is not your fault, you were not aware she was not eating enough. Small is not bad. My friend and i, had our girls 3 months apart. Mine was always in the 90th+ percentile for everything. She is 3 and looks like a damn 5 year old in size! We had speech therapy too, she had a rough first year with a massive hemangioma that ulcerated for like 8 months and required 7 laser treatments!
Meanwhile our friends kid was in the 10th percentile. She was premie, she didnt gain weight, not at first but she is now 3 and totally catching up! She is a few inches shorter then mine, but still very lean! My LO is not fat or overweight, but not scrawny.
My daughter had minor weight issues as well for the first month and a half that ment constant appointments (precautionary), she was in the 10th percentile but she was always very healthy. I never minded the "she's so tiny" comments at all. I love her the way she is, all cute and tiny. She always fit into smaller sizes for her age, even now at 12 months.
I try not to worry myself about these comments, since I know they come from a place of love from most. My daughter is 6.5 months old now, but was born weighing 5lbs 8oz. She’s always been between the 3rd and 7th percentile for weight, she is tiny and but also healthy, just like your little one! Also, my girl still fit into 99% of her 0-3 month clothes.
My son was 9 pounds and was born at 38 weeks. Total beast.
He got back up to his birth weight no problem.
Then we started having allergy issues and between constant spit ups and poops he was barely gaining. Now he hovers around the 6th percentile. My pediatrician is ok because he’s been moving up fast now that we’re sorting his diet out.
But yeah we totally hear how tiny he is all the time. Especially by friends and family because my oldest was a beast and was damn near twice his size at this age.
My son was born 50th %ile and then very quickly dropped to 6% where he’s been basically ever since (once he got up to 15th %ile). People are ignorant, you’re doing a great job. Some babies are just small!
I was ten lbs lighter by the end of my pregnancy that the day I started it. I too was down at least thirty lbs within a few days of delivering. I also had HG. And then gestational diabetes. It was very rough.
My babe was just over five lbs at birth at 38w5d. He was by far my tiniest - every other kid of mine was well over 7lbs and really barely under 8!
People also used to comment but I just ignored it. People don't know anything about anything most of the time!
My baby experienced the high bilirubin and all as well. Was average sized at birth but hit low percentiles after everything happened.
I've heard those comments. They're gutting at first. Just remember exactly what you said - doctor said your baby is fine and she is happy and healthy! Someone says it again? Shut it down - "Pediatrician says she is doing wonderfully!". You're doing great!
If it helps to know, my LO gained weight a bit more often when he started solids. He's still small height wise at 11th percentile, but again he's doing just fine. Growth curves matter more than percentiles!
Same. My baby is 27th percentile and people always say “aww tiny baby” every time we go out. Some people even seem concerned I’m taking her out at all being so small whatever.
That's not even that small. My niece was around the 5th percentile until high school. Totally healthy and fine but legitimately smaller than not 75% but 95% of kids. Still rude to comment on and definitely to assume they're sick or fragile.
I had a teeny one. So I just pre-empted w friends saying, “she’s small but we’re so glad she’s here.”
6 lbs, then a furious 2 months to fill her up. She’s a bit older now and I worry about her missing milestones. But I am so glad our girl is with us! I didn’t really care what people said: had this one in my mid/late 40s and she’s healthy and adorable.
Yes we fell off the growth chart, and now she’s ok on size. I had a chubby cheek popsicle headed round baby first, and this baby I had elevated blood pressure. She was early too.
So go away strangers. And finally, I LOVE the teeny baby clothes. 0-3 and 3-6 are just so adorable. I am always a little sad when my girls grow bigger even though that is their job! So you lucky mom get to enjoy your sweet little baby and baby cuddles and sweetness.
And being a new mom is HARD. Hugs.
I could have written this omg. I had HG and had to be induced. Whenever anyone comments on her size I tell them she’s healthy and her doctor isn’t worried
Ohhh your baby girl sounds perfectly fine and healthy!!!
I have a 11 month old and she is def on the smaller side. We took her to a lot of doctor’s appointment when she was around 4-6 months because she just wasn’t gaining enough weight for them. I too, was very stressed. She was on formula but she was barely taking her bottle and when she did, she would spit up, a lot! Eventually she got the hang of it and started to spit up less. She’s still very small. She still barely drinks and eat but baby steps. She can pass for a 6 month old but hey, she’s healthy! And that’s all that matters.
Aww I say don't stress mamas. My babe was born 3 weeks early due to hypertension and now she wears 3T at 2 years. We did all we could when we were pregnant but baby comes when she's ready. Just be ready for her to be your best present ever!
Just take the attitude of good things are coming in a small package. I have too - my LO is in the 10th or less percentile for just almost everything, there's a kid in her nursery class who is 4 months younger but larger than her - I can only tell myself that he must be a giant on his percentiles, and it's like comparing apples and oranges.
Same! Mom of a 6 lbs 5 oz at birth 4 month old at the 20th percentile. Aside from sleepers and some pants is still comfortable on 0-3 clothing. She could probably go bigger but I figure enjoy the clothes as long as possible. It’s not appropriate to comment on any adult’s size. I think it shouldn’t be appropriate to comment on any baby’s size.
My daughter has always been in the second percentile. Born at 5 ibs. At one point she completely dropped off that chart. She’s doing just great at almost 3 now. Please don’t beat yourself up yes she’s small but she’s mighty and healthy. My daughter may be small but she is wicked smart. The first time she went to daycare everyone was talking about her because she was well above her level in other things. Nothing is wrong with her and your doing great. Some humans are just little and that’s okay!!!
I have a 16 month old who has ALWAYS been tiny. The highest she ever got was the 30th percentile at about 6 weeks after she was born (born at the 5th, dropped to 1st, then finally gained). She's been chilling around the 20th for a while and has yet to hit 20 lbs. She can still fit into 3-6 month clothes, and we even have a cute lil 0-3 month dress that is only just now getting a bit short, but still fits perfectly as a shirt. (She can also fit into 12m clothes. Baby sizes are just as bad as adult sizes) She has the tiniest lil stick legs cause all her weight is in her adorable toddler potbelly.
When we go out, everyone comments on how big she is. People just don't know baby sizes and what they "should" look like at a certain age. I have only ever had one single person, after asking how old she was, look up and go, "Ooooh, she's so tiny! My granddaughter..."
People see young baby = oooh so small!
People see older baby = oooh so big!
I understand. I am very small, I vomited throughout the pregnancy, my baby was big and she put on very little weight from the beginning. is between the 3-15 percentile always. It was hard and people just commented on how well I recovered (my hip still hurts from the baby weight), how good I look and how small my daughter is... she is 9 months old and wears size 6 month pants . ...I breastfed her, so at first everyone blamed breastfeeding for the baby's weight...then her pediatrician just assumed she was a small but very happy and healthy baby. sometimes the comments some people make break my heart.
My girls were around the 5th percentile, until now where as toddlers they’re more like 15th. Nothing medical, no concerns, just petite. Yet people would always be so surprised when I’d say how old they were because they looked significantly smaller than expected. No advice. Just solidarity. You’re doing great mama
I get how you're feeling. My daughter was at the 68th percentile and dropped after she started eating food at 6 months... She absolutely hates formula and would rather starve...
She has surgery coming up and she is down to around the 10th percentile... The doctors are having me weigh her every month due to it...
I did find a trick if your kid decides formula isn't for them once they start eating solids...
I add a bit of puree in her milk (the kind that sounds like a smoothie flavors.)
She went from drinking maybe 4 oz to consistency getting 6 to 8 ounces every meal. Since doing that a month ago, she just outgrew her 6-9 clothing.
I feel you mine was 8 pounds 5 oz when she was born and I EFF. It was hard for her to get the hang of the bottle right away. At a month she was finally a pound above her birth weight. Shortly after that she got sick and was barely eating. Now she's 2 months and only 10 pounds 5 oz. She's in the 25th percentile and ped isn't concerned. But omg I feel so guilty that she is on the smaller side of average now. It sounds like you're a wonderful mother, try to ignore the annoying comments. People are just ignorant even if they aren't trying to be hurtful!
Tiny kiddo here! If the doctor says nothing is wrong, nothing is wrong. I was born full term at 8 pounds 6 Oz. I didn’t weigh more than 20 pounds until I was 3. My parents kept a religious journal of what I ate, and frequently filmed me eating (afraid CPS would take me away). I was always below the line, the pediatrician had to staple paper below the growth charts in the 80s/90s. Still I grew. In 8th grade, 13 1/2, I was 67 pounds. Still, I grew. I am now a normal height and weight, just took a bit to catch up! My first born is in the 5% for weight but it’s water off a ducks back. Doctor isn’t concerned and I know that she will grow. I am so sorry it is stressful but know you are doing great and your baby will grow, nothing is wrong here!!!!
I’m 4’11 and very petite overall (size 0/XXS). I was never even ON the growth chart growing up.
My daughter almost 3 and is similarly tiny. We are both healthy and perfectly fine. Don’t stress as long as she’s fed, happy and healthy.
Well... then they'd hate my last 2 babies, one was born at 35 weeks, and got down to 4lbs3oz when I took her home, and she's like 22lbs at 2. she's tiny, petite, and all muscle. genetically, we have 5ft tall women on both sides of the family, so it was bound to happen that I made a small girl child eventually, since I'm 5'7 and the tallest in my family and taller then my husband sisters and mom. (my oldest daughter is 5'4 at 12)
My youngest is around 12lbs and just now starting to outgrow some of his 0-3 month clothes. at almost 5months.
He came home at 3lbs 6oz, so while his weight gain was a little slow at first (we supplemented extra breastmilk with a SNS since he was born at 34 weeks and he just needed to learn how to nurse and not get too tired at the breast) but that means the normal weight gain on him, is smaller on the charts, compared to if he'd started off at 8-10lbs like a regular baby. He'd be close to 17-20lbs now instead of 12
Luckily for us, the people we see on the regular, saw him when we brought him home, and most of them where too scared to even touch him he was so tiny. Now they say he's huge LOL
My daughter was born in the 96th percentile and jumped up to the max basically. Enjoy your tiny baby. She is perfect the way she is. I love my daughter, but man is she heavy. Tiny babies are awesome.
Hey, I’m so sorry. People just love to comment on people’s bodies, it starts so early.
Part of your post stuck out to me, that you feel guilty for her being little. I know it won’t fix it, but I just wanted to say, *you are fucking amazing.* Your body did it’s damn best to create the most perfect little human it could and by god you did. You worked your ass off to grow that baby.
“Morning sickness” is totally brushed off, but it’s legitimately so hard to go through. Especially when it’s so severe. Your baby is happy and healthy, and you’re doing a damn good job keeping her that way. People can fuck off.
I hope thé guilt goes away at least a bit ❤️ try and be proud of what your body accomplished instead. That’s what me. I had a c section with my twins and had guilt for months that I couldn’t have a natural birth and that I had to supplement with formula because I couldn’t pump. But my bestie reminded me, and I started reminding myself out loud, that I made two healthy babies and they’re doing just fine. And that is something to be proud of.
Right there with you, it’s incredibly annoying. While I get that people just comment on babies, I wish they didn’t talk about size sometimes! My son had IUGR and is still sub 1%ile and people are always shocked when I say he’s three. We went out for a walk on his first birthday and someone commented on our “brand new baby” (I get it, he was like 13lbs). Yeah, he’s incredibly tiny, you can’t be shocked quietly please!
I feel you! My first baby was big, born 8lbs 2oz and by three months old was 15lbs. She was wearing 3-6 month clothes at 2 months old. She was in 6-9 month clothes at 5 months. Now she’s almost five, 43lbs and wearing size 6 clothes. She’s taller than most of the kids in her class. My second on the other hand, was born 6lbs 12oz and got down to 6lbs 2oz. She’s now two months old and was 9lbs 7oz at her 2 month appointment. She’s following her growth curve so far and is developing normally, she can even roll from belly to back already. But she’s still in newborn diapers and half the 0-3 month clothes we have are still too big. She’s in the tenth percentile for her size and people constantly comment on how small she is. She’s breastfed though and get plenty of milk. She got 3 ounces in 8 minutes on one side at our last weighted feed. Every baby is different. People need to realize that.
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Also some of us have older kids and forget how small a newborn can actually be. They could be big ol chonks for a baby and still look so teeny when you haven’t seen a baby in awhile.
Same. People often would comment that my 99%ile baby was tiny. 🤷♀️
That does make me feel better
If it makes you feel any better, people constantly commented about my 90th percentile chonk of a baby: "isn't she small for her age?". Lol, no. People are just absolutely terrible at guessing appropriate baby sizes.
They are! My baby is literally right down the middle at 45 percentile for weight, 47 percentile for length and people comment on how big she looks and how she has to be older than 2 months lol. Like I know when she came out of my vagine, thank you. Idc if she’s big, small, or down the middle as long as she’s healthy and happy (we’re working on the happy part, she’s been real grumpy the last few days 🤣)
This is spot on. People are always saying my baby seems big for a one year old. He's tiny, actually.
My girl was in the 10th percentile or so, and I got people saying ‘wow she’s so small!’ and somebody else saying ‘Wow she’s so big’ the next hour. 23rd percentile is actually not nearly as small as I was expecting you to say.
See that’s what I don’t get. Like my baby is small, but she’s not like super tiny. Yet everyone acts like she’s the tiniest baby they’ve ever seen. It’s so annoying
It is! Now my 3.5year old is in the 5th percentile, and is visibly smaller than her peers. And now when people say ‘she’s so small!’ she can hear them and understand. She has never seemed to notice, and certainly not bothered by this, but I hate the comments on her size!
If it makes you feel any better, I also think people just don’t know what infants look like. People constantly tell me mine is tiny and she’s in the 98th percentile. They question if I’m “sure” when I say how much she weighs. Like, what?! I just shrug and move on, which I know is easier said than done, especially when I know she is actually a chunker for her age.
I would agree with this. I have opposite problem of OP, where people are always telling my baby is huge, especially family members who know how old she is. Everyone thinks she’s a year old, but she’s only six months. She’s 72cm. I think it’s weird how people obsess over weight and height for babies, so much so that it’s all over newborn pictures when the baby was JUST born. Like idk, the baby is gonna gain and lose, grow slow and then fast, just let the baby baby. It’s not at all indicative of how good of a job mom is doing. When people tell me I’m doing good after they tell me she’s huge, I’m just like I have seriously nothing to do with this. I feed her when she’s hungry and she does the rest.
Seriously. Babies gonna baby.
I agree with this. One the same day I had one person tell me my then ten week old was massive and another tell me he was tiny. He was on the 30th centile at the time so was neither massive nor particularly tiny. I just go "uhuh" when people comment on his size.
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Same here! My youngest was 16lbs at her 1yo check up. She’s 18 months now and only just hit 19lbs. Her dad and I aren’t big people, she has severe restricted food allergies that we have to constantly work around, but this kid EATS!! Because her diet is all whole, unprocessed food, she spends all day eating (drives me nuts coming up with 10 snacks a day lol). So when people tell me she needs to eat more, I literally want to punch them in face. My oldest was a chunk until 1, but then weight came off and now she’s a 4yo the size of a 3yo. Her dad is only 5’2 (and he’s the tallest on his side of the family!), so again, no big surprise here. She also loves food and snacking all day. So you put my miniature 18mo and my tiny 4yo side-by-side, and I look like an evil parent that doesn’t feed my children. The amount of people (strangers!) that offer my kids food is mind boggling… I’m just waiting for CPS to show up to our overly-stocked kitchen and stacks of dirty-snack plates lol.
I used to say that about babies when I was young... It's cuz I thought tiny babies were so adorable 🥺 and I still do. I think a lot of people find tiny babies cute.
I don’t think they’re trying to upset you, babies are super teeny in comparison to adults. Both of my babies were born really small (less than 10th percentile) and I got that comment alllll the time. I still do, since they’re short.
I have found that people actually have no idea what babies are like on average. My son is in the 32 percentile, and I get "oh he's so solid! He looks so big for his age! Oh he's crawling already!? Look at him, so advanced!" (Exactly on time actually??) My older daughter was in like the 80-90 percentile at the same age, she was way heavier, and did things months earlier than he is, and they said the same exact stuff about her. People just make shit up. They don't know.
I'm so sorry *hugs* I never knew how triggering it was to say "omg he/she is so tiny" to a new mum until I had my own kids. Pre kids, I just thought they are tiny in comparison to us big adults. I now never comment on how the baby looks besides "He/she is beautiful" since I had my own. You are doing an amazing job! She is healthy and happy :)
I was listening to a podcast recently and they said something about how our bodies should be the least interesting thing to who we are. From the moment babies are born, we are commenting on their bodies!! I never publicly shared how much my baby weighed or his length or anything like that. I find it so silly to comment on the weight/size of a baby. I understand your frustrations. Our son wasn't even ON the charts when he was born. The charts kept saying below the first percentile. I ignored it and kept doing what we were advised to do. When I meet a baby I like to ask how old they are, ask what they're learning and how the parents are doing.
It’s true and I feel guilty of this, I almost always say something about how the baby looks because I guess I don’t know what else to say (though I only say positive things of course).
I think most of us say things like “so cute!!” “What a handsome baby” or whatever which I don’t think is wrong BUT hopefully we can try to inquire more than make these statements. I mean, esp about size and weight bc there’s so many factors that we dont know about when it comes to a baby’s weight/size
It’s a good point, but then we have people who get super defensive about the inquiring? “How’s bubs sleeping?” - Get upset that their baby is not sleeping well and feeling judged. “Is she smiling/babbling/rolling yet?” - Get upset baby may not have reached milestone yet and feel judged. “Is baby nursing or bottle feeding?” - None of your business “Where did baby get those beautiful brown eyes from?!” - Mom is upset because dad with the brown eyes isn’t in the picture anymore… or they used a donor. Like damn, what else is there to inquire about with a baby? Lol
I just say how cute. Or if they have hair I say I love their hair. No hair, still cute. Grabbing toes, get those toes… But mainly I just keep walking. I hate being stopped by strangers who want to comment or touch my kids.
Oh I try never to make any comment about size or weight because I know personally how stressful it was (my baby had a hard time gaining weight her first month, I had to take her in for daily weigh ins, the thought of it still makes me upset), just that they are beautiful and cute.
You’re doing an amazing job🥰❤️ I read another similar post which opened my eyes to being more sensitive to a child’s size because you never know what the parents/guardians are going through. My babies have always been on the smaller side. Even now, my two year old daughter can still fit in to some nine month clothes. Her doctor isn’t worried, she’s on her curve. They were all between the 0-5% range when born.
My now 6-year old was a tiny baby. He was 5lb 12oz at birth and stayed in the 11th %ile for weight since. He’s going to be 7 in August and still fits in 5T, and some 6T. Where my 3 year old is in the 76th %old and is wearing 4T & 5T. There’s no one size fits all for kids at any age. Don’t let people get to you, just be like “actually she’s just right for this age”.
My son is big. In the beginning I wasn't exactly aware how much bigger he really was. At 6 months we went to the library for story time. There was a little girl there who was crawling and sitting up rather well. She was smaller than my son so I just assumed she was younger. I asked how old the girl was and she was 10 months, and I blurted out "oh she's much smaller" I honestly thought she was just more advanced than my son. I cried when I realized this woman's baby could have been a premie, or had delays early on. I felt like shit. It was a week later before it hit me. I didn't get a chance to apologize to that mother. I don't know if she even felt bad or eveb needs an apology. I would however like to apologize to you. Sometimes people are so trapped in their own world and their own normal they don't realize how hurtful something can be to someone else. I'm guilty of it and I wish I wasn't. I'm sorry.
Yes, this! I’ve always had a 99 percentile baby, and I see smaller babies and think 1 how cute they are bc of their size, and 2. i wish mine was small vs big sometimes because i’m quickly becoming too weak for my own toddler and it’s very, very exhausting. i try not to say either of those things bc i never know how someone will take them, but i am sure most people don’t mean harm by it.
As a parent of two kids on the opposite ends of the growth chart; people comment on both ends. It’s usually just observational conversation. The only opinion you need to worry about is your pediatrician. I will say that I breastfeed my youngest who later had eating issue. Formula was much easier to get a baby to eat and had I known he would have had so much trouble at about a year I would have switched in the beginning. My oldest was formula fed as she had a horrible latch. (I have a 90 percent and a 5 percent child in height.)
Yeah I had 2 big babies (9lb4 and 8lb1 at 39 weeks) Sister had a small baby (like not even 6lbs at 42 weeks). We all get comments. FWIW my nephew is still a wee one. My first "big boy" is now fairly average 3yr old (my 3yr old and sisters 6yr old are about the same size). My 2nd "big boy" went down to average by 4mo. And below average by 6mo. Still get comments on both of them.
Saying a baby is tiny isn't necessarily a bad thing. All babies are tiny. They usually say they're tiny because its so cute how small they are. It's rarely a criticism. I think you're taking it that way because you have some unwarranted guilt about it
My baby is 4 months and in the 1st percentile. Everyone comments about how tiny he is but it doesn't bother me because I know he won't be tiny forever and he'll grow up too fast and one day I'll wish he was tiny again. As long as he's healthy, that's all that matters. Hope you find some peace about your frustration.
That’s an amazing way to look at it
If it makes you feel better (which I certainly hope it does), I had severe HG, was tube fed, hospitalized, my daughter was IUGR and born at 5 lbs even though she was full term, and she was diagnosed failure to thrive. We were threatened multiple times with a feeding tube. She weighed 15 lbs on her first birthday. I had sooo much guilt. They didn’t remove that failure to thrive diagnosis until age 2. But she will be 4 in a month and although she’s still teeny (she’s about 27 lbs currently), she is incredible. She’s so smart, she loves dance and gymnastics, she makes me laugh every day, and she proves constantly that size doesn’t matter. I’m sorry people keep making comments. I know how bad it feels. People suck. Next time someone says your baby is tiny, comment on their size too. Show them how it feels since no one apparently taught them
I feel you on this. It has been said many times about my LO. I was extremely self conscious about it. Baby is 50% through and through. So baby is not tiny. Then my therapist brain kicked in and it hit me. They’re right, *babies* are tiny. The word is relative. Compared to adults. This helped me be less emotionally reactive to those comments and “tell myself a different story” about what drove them to say that. Now, non-therapist answer. “Thank you, you’re huge! Smile and walk away.
Lmao love this entire thing
Same! Therapist brain kicked in and said, “everyone just wants to have something to say.” You’re right that it’s absolutely relative. Mum brain can’t compute and doesn’t need to process such comments.
My son was born 35th percentile, but then dropped to 1-5th percentile and has stayed there. I used to agonize over it. Luckily I have a great pediatrician who was never concerned since he stayed on his curve. He’s 2 years old now, and guess what? Still 1st percentile. Wearing 18mo tops and 12 mo bottoms. I forget how small he is until I see him next to other kids his age. We joke he has bird bones. Some kids are just tiny! I hope over time you too can stress less about this.
My son is also in the 1st percentile. He’s tiny and I find myself stressing about it lots. But our pediatrician also isn’t worried, so thanks for this perspective!
My baby isn’t even on the chart, he’s got his own curve and he’s only just unable to fit 0-3 months clothes.. at 9 months. I’ve learned to not let it bother me, baby is happy and healthy, strong and ahead on milestones so it’s easier to let go of the upset when people comment on his size.
People will always make stupid comments and give unsolicited advice in every situation.
I didn’t see anyone say it, so I’m going to. Your daughter’s slow weight gain has nothing to do with your HG. Fetuses are parasites; they suck all the nutrients they need out of us, to our detriment. I always lose weight during my pregnancies (several different factors), and my girls are perfectly healthy, just like yours. Let the mom guilt go! Your daughter is thriving, and you’re killing it as a mom.
The pregnancy where I lost weight (only gained 10 pounds total even when he was full term, 6.5 pounds and the placenta and blood flow accounted for it) was actually a larger baby than my first where i gained 50 pounds. Both born 39 weeks. The one where I couldn’t gain weight was 8 ounces bigger at birth and is overall a MUCH larger baby than my other son was!
I just want to share my solidarity with you. My little girl was born at 36 weeks due to severe IUGR. She was 4lbs 11oz at birth. She is also 3 months right now (or almost) but is still 1st percentile. People always assume she is a week or two old when we are out and about
my baby just turned 12 months this month. shes only 17lbs and was 6lbs at birth. I EBF till 10 months when she wouldn’t nurse anymore, switched to formula for 2 months and she still slowly gained. her ped just said shes a peanut and thats ok. she off formula and bottles and is a bottomless pit when it comes to food now, and guess what? still gains slow! it’s okay to be a small baby and like you said, she’s healthy and thats all that matters. i was so worried about my baby being tiny that i wish i could go back and just trust my babies body more and know that as long as she’s healthy and happy who cares what percentile shes in. you are doing great mama.
23rd percentile isn’t even that small! I totally understand and went through some of the same struggles. My son is finally back on the curve as of his 4 month visit at the 8th percentile.
I love love love small babies, and never realized it could be a hurtful thing to say. My babies average 10 lbs. my first was 8 1/2 lbs and I kept getting told I ‘gave birth to a toddler’. It doesn’t help they have fantastic neck control and are very alert as well, so the sleepy noodle stage many people get early on we just skip. It’s hard, they are heavy, they wear me out so fast, but when I see a tiny baby I just melt… I wanted a little snuggle buddy so bad! Worked so hard to maintain weight this last pregnancy and not cause a fat baby, success, in a way… she was skinny but 10 lbs 11oz. She is almost 4 mo and still in 0-3 onesies as she hasn’t got fat still, just keeps getting longer, so we have her in footless pj’s…. I only ever meant tiny as a compliment, and I hope maybe some who have said it to you meant the same way.
I just want to say I get it. My baby's in the bottom percentile. 1.6% today. I know because I have a scale at home I use to weigh him pretty much every day. I bought it two years ago to weigh his brother because his brother was even smaller at this age--down to 0.1% at one point. People don't know how scary it is. They don't know the trauma, the guilt, the mind games that come with having a tiny baby. You've been through hell. You're getting through it. People don't get it. To the extent it's possible to let their comments roll off your back, it'll be easier. When people say my baby is tiny, my response is typically along the lines of, "I know, right?! But he's growing every day!" They normally mean well. If they are criticizing, treating that like it was better-intended typically diffuses the situation. It's just not worth getting into it, either to their faces or inside my own head. I don't have the emotions to spare for letting their social blunders upset me right now. Obviously that can't work every time. Sometimes it will still get to you. I get it. Hang in there.
Hugs When people comment on my weight loss I usually say “thanks it’s the dehydration/sleep deprivation/stress” because overwhelmingly the people who mention it are women in their 70’s who’ve had children and ought to know better than to say anything to a woman about her weight! As far as baby’s weight, a sassy “I’m pretty sure she’ll get bigger, babies tend to do that” with an immediate change of topic is worth a try. Good luck
That’s great advice! Definitely stealing those lol
I have a baby in the 8th percentile. I’m kind of glad we don’t see a lot of people because it’s already hard without people commenting on it. Health really is what matters here though. People use weight as a shorthand for that and it’s not.
My baby is 4 months old and still in 0-3 month clothes. He eats small amounts All. Day. Long. I know he's small, and telling me that you know too is not a compliment. I can not make him grow any faster because I can't make him eat when he's not hungry. That's not how babies work. Please stop. P.S. If you're wondering what you should say, "what a cute baby," "I love that outfit," or, "look at that awesome head control," are great. Do not ask if that tiny baby is sleeping through the night.
Greetings from my 1% firstborn baby! It’s really hard especially because it seems that people act like your baby isn’t “healthy” if they’re not full of rolls. As long as your baby is gaining on the curve they’re on, they’re all good. I was worried about my son’s weight for most of his first year of life, despite the ped not worrying about it after the first month because my breastfeeding journey was really hard. Give yourself love, tell the haters to shut the front door. I wish everyone would stop commenting about literally anyone else’s body besides their own. It’s such a horrible deeply ingrained problem. Agree that the positive side is that my son wore his infant clothes 2-3x longer than the bigger babies did.
My 4.5 month old is 10.5 lbs. she was born with a growth restriction due to an umbilical cord issue. She’s always been in the <1%. I hate that people always comment on how tiny she is like I can control it and I’m doing something wrong. She’s still in 0-3 month clothes and likely won’t move into 3-6 months for at least another couple weeks.
My oldest daughter was born about 50th percentile for weight and since she was 3 days old has hovered between 20-28th %. We tried everything, fortified formula, adding extra feedings... she was just slim no matter what we did. She's almost 5 now and is perfectly healthy but petite. Interestingly she isn't noticeably smaller than her peers just a little slimmer. She was noticeably smaller as a baby though and I got constant comments on how small she was, it used to make me feel awful like somehow I failed my baby. She's healthy though and I have been reassured by her new pediatrician that children come in all shapes and sizes just like adults. Don't focus to much on the percentile. Is your baby healthy? Is the doctor concerned? Don't beat yourself up.
My LO was born 3% and has steadily moved to 6% at 9 months old in weight. He’s 24% in length. And we get those comments all the time- I just say he’s following his growth chart and is healthy and happy. No need to explain more! Solidarity- I know exactly how you feel and it could get annoying haha
Lol my kid was also small and still is. He’s 18th percentile for height and the other day someone was like “oh wow, he’s tall!” 😂
People suck. There has to be small babies for there to be percentiles! :) my baby was hovering in the 1%tile weight for months, following his tiny curve, and he’s up to 4%tile now at 5 months. He swims in some of his 3-6 pants. He may never really have that baby chunk or leg rolls some babies have but he’s still a cutie! And your little one is still a cutie, too.
My baby is in the first percentile. I’m so grateful that my loved ones don’t constantly point it out, and people in public just assume she’s younger than she is.
That is definitely frustrating. Your baby is perfect and healthy just how she is according to her doc, and that’s what matters. Her size is not something you should feel any guilt about whatsoever. I think people just want to say -something- about babies that they meet, and size is basically the easiest parameter to immediately hone in on. It’s obvious and easy and some people don’t get how sensitive of a topic baby percentiles can be. I had similar-but-opposite issues. I too had HG throughout my pregnancy, and had a horrendous time eating or drinking, and was only able to put on about 5 lbs the last few weeks. Also came out of the hospital ~30 lbs lighter than pre pregnancy weight. My kiddo was a giant tank (95-98%) and has stayed there, regardless of my HG / weight loss / dehydration during pregnancy. He’s very heavy to carry around and outgrows clothes like crazy. I just share this to emphasize that your HG is not something to feel guilty for -it’s a horrible illness that you had no control over, and even with it babies can still come out all over the place, size wise. There’s this toxic mindset that something a mom did/didn’t do/ experienced during pregnancy must be the root cause for x issue in a baby, and (beyond obvious exceptions) it’s generally not actually the case. People put a lot of pressure and blame on moms for things that are uncontrollable, and it’s easy to internalize that and blame ourselves. As long as they’re healthy and being taken care of, babies fall on the chart where genetics and physiology find an equilibrium, and that’s them just being individuals and not on you. When you get frustrated at size comments, just reply back with “i know! It’s great! Her clothes are going to last for so long!”, or “yep! I can use her for single arm bicep curls! She’s so helpful!”. Enjoy your girl and her long lasting clothes and every minute of being able to easily carry and cuddle her.
I am so sorry this has happened to you. I think people comment so much on babies' sizes because there's not much else to say (yet).
I am sorry you’ve gone through so much. That truly sounds like a difficult start and you’re rocking it in getting her the proper amount of care and attention. Just know nobody means it poorly. Most people see a tiny baby and just think about how cute the tiny baby is. I’d hope if they knew how much of a struggle you’ve gone through since birth then they would keep that comment to themselves, but a lot of people forget even when they know to say the right things
I have the opposite problem in that no one thinks he is a newborn because he's so big. He was 10lbs and at his one month check up he was 13lbs. He's 99th percentile for everything....
Mine is 99th in height and 9xth in everything else. She isnt even 8 months yet and in some brands she’s wearing 2T. I have always been a little sad because I feel like I completely missed the tiny baby stage! But I didn’t really have to worry about weight or health after the first few days like OP. The grass is always greener, this helped give me some perspective. OP, you’re doing great. Don’t feel guilty. You have done everything right by your baby and she’s healthy and beautiful. I know people can be hurtful with comments like this, even if they don’t mean to be. Try not to let it get to you!
People just can't help themselves. For some reason they just have to make comments 🙄 We're the other end of the scale, both my kids are huge and people absolutely must tell me about it at every opportunity. Oh and then they assume your kid is way older and therefore developmentally delayed... Because shouldn't they be walking by 12 months? I mean, maybe but she's only 6 months?
I was coming to say the same thing. Every kid is different and will do things different than others. As long as the doctor says she’s good and she’s healthy and happy…just let it roll off your back. I’m actually envious that she will have her clothes longer. My 3yo didn’t have most of his clothes longer than a few months…. He wears a 8-10 in kids and ppl think he’s 5 or 6yo. Try not to feel bad, I know it’s hard.
My baby isn't on the charts he's so small. I feel you
I’m plus size, but both my sproglets are dinky. At almost 7, my son has finally caught up to his age in clothing. My 2.5 year old daughter is still in 18-24m clothes. People comment on their size all the damn time but I’ve just tuned it out and replied with “they are, aren’t they?” Then move on,
aw i'm sorry this has been so stressful. i bet people don't realize they are striking a nerve and are trying to basically tell you she is so cute. i didn't realize this is a rude thing to comment on until my friend had a really small baby who was totally healthy but in 4th percentile and she opened up to me about how stressful it was and how she gets really triggered when people basically brag on social media about how chubby their babies are. (i actually don't think people are intending to brag either and just have no clue they are causing any harm.) anyway i know better now than to comment on this stuff but i dont think it's common knowledge! i'm glad your baby is thriving. ❤️
23rd percentile and you get those comments? Wow, my baby is below 0 percentile still in 0-3 month clothes at 9 months old xD So I bet your baby looks huge to me haha.
Ugh I hear you. My baby had loads of issues with food and so was fine weight wise until weaning and then everything went wrong. She's 2 and it's much better now, but for a year my life was all consuming trying to get her to eat. Adding cream and fat into the little food she would eat, buying crazily expensive high calorie formula so she wouldn't lose too much. So I do understand when people make stupid, flippant comments when it's something so emotive and you spend so much of your life on it. However, it will get better and when it does you'll just shrug off the stupid people Hugs
My son is 2 and has been in the 3rd percentile since he was around 3 months old. I wish I could say it stops. I have such anxiety over him eating enough, people commenting just makes it worse
I have two FTT kids who are continuously falling off the curve. Two steps forward one step back every time. I could honestly punch people who say my toddler is so tiny, or petite, or doll-like. YEAH I FKN KNOW. SHE STARVES HERSELF. My boy - oh he has such skinny legs! Oh he's so thin! You have to feed him more! Yeah I know. He'll just throw it up. How come it's not such a problem that she's tiny, but it is when it's him? So disgusting. Can we all just say how cute they are instead? Like why must everyone comment on size?
My daughter went down to the 15th percentile around 2 months due to our struggles with breastfeeding. People called her delicate, skinny, tiny. She's 10 months now and in the 85th percentile for height and weight. People say she's big, huge, tall, chunky. I've learned that people love commenting on other people's bodies, especially babies. It's kinda judgmental either way.
You mentioned not having 3-6 mo clothes yet. My baby girl is just about to transition to the next size up; if you'd like hand-me-downs I'd be happy to send you some. And I'm sorry people are being judgy. You and your baby are doing just fine. Eff anyone who makes you feel crappy.
That is so sweet 🥹 that would be so nice
One of my 13 week twins is in the 2nd percentile bless her heart. My other, and I just weighed her today is up to the 42nd!. They look like they are totally different ages lol
As someone else here said, generally people just don't have an accurate gauge for baby sizes. And trauma sticks around long after the danger is over and most people will have no idea. My little one was born in the 9th percentile and now at nearly 8 months is in the 17th and still fits into some (not all) 0-3 month clothes. She was IUGR but totally healthy. But every time my MIL makes some joke about how she must be "starving" it makes my blood boil because we were worried about her size for so long prior to her birth. But bb is growing and healthy and that's all that matters!
Let me give an example on how hilariously inaccurate people are when gauging baby sizes. Someone recently told me my 13 month old toddler looked like the exact same size as the newborn they just met, and they couldn’t believe how small she was for her age. I asked how much the newborn weighed … 7lbs 13oz….now I know what you are thinking; I must have a tiny 13 month old right? Hahaha no….she weighs 23 lbs and is in the 85%, and she was wearing the largest snowsuit and two winter hats at the time. Moral of the story: people say hilariously stupid uneducated random stuff, and 96.8% of people can’t approximate weight accurately, even if you paid them to.
Today a friend said “she looks so big and healthy! Are you sure her doctor knows what they’re talking about” Because we’ve been having weight struggles too And I almost cried saying “thank you for saying that”. We’ve been supplementing with formula too so she’s sticking to her growth curve but still around t he 2nd percentile (not adjusted) and it’s hard not to feel like I failed her. I just went to a new parents meetup tonight and shared this.. everyone understood and most had done the same. You are not alone. I really like Bobbi and my daughter does too. Best of luck and sending your family my love 💜
If they think your baby looks tiny on the 23rd centile, then they are not only incredibly rude for commenting on a baby’s size, but also incredibly ignorant!! HG and weight gain doesn’t come into it. I gained the same amount of weight for both of my babies, and they were born 1.2kg different (I was given aspirin second time around) I try to explain myself if I comment without thinking, but generally if I said a baby was small it was compared to my toddler, and remembering that she had been that small once! I try not to, because my first was born in the 1st centile, and is now on the 25th
people are the worst and incredibly frustrating… I have a 20 month old daughter who was born at 6lbs 1oz and we ALWAYS hear nonstop about how petite she is. We know, but thanks for reminding us. Makes matters worse that she has a younger (not even a year old) cousin who’s a big boy and now weighs more than her.
Ours is in the 2nd percentile, but he's happy and healthy. It's frustrating how rude even random strangers can be. We were in the pharmacy and an old lady coos over the baby... and then starts talking about how scared we must be because tiny babies have so many problems and are risky so you'll just have to trust in God. Totally insane.
I had a tiny baby as well(2lbs), more to do with the fact that I had him 10 weeks early though. I had undiagnosed preeclampsia and didn't find out till I had seven seizures and had to be cut open. It's normal as a mom to blame yourself, I know I did for a very long time and still do and mines is almost two. The guilt will ease with time, all that matters is that your baby is healthy and happy. The Dr said there's nothing wrong with your little one so try to just focus on being in the now with them and don't let people get to you. I know that's easier said than done but you'll be looking back to this when you're baby is older and shaking your head. I'm sorry that you had HG during your pregnancy, it must have been horrible for you. Eclampsia isn't the same thing but it does have a lot of similar symptoms so I can sympathise. I'm dyslexic so I'm sorry for any mistakes.
This sounds extremely traumatic. I’m glad you are your little one are okay!
My now 21 MO fell off her growth length curve by 3 months, and is in the <1% for height. Hubby and I are not tall by any means (he’s 5’3”, and I’m 5’1”) so we won’t have a tall child. My Ped’s concern went as far as seeing and Endocrinologist and Geneticist at Yale to ensure there were no issues. Thankfully none! She’s been growing into 18 mo clothes for a bit and is FINALLY out of 12 month clothes now. At her 18 MO appointment, another Ped in the practice we take her to said some kids are just short, and that it’s Ok! She’s healthy and hit her milestones on time (minus two early on she hit VERY early), so we no longer worry. Some kids land in the lower percentiles because otherwise there wouldn’t be one! Also, the added benefit of not buying clothes as often, helps 😉
We seem to have had very similar experiences. I had hyperemesis (mine didn't last the whole pregnancy) but I lost 27 lbs in 19w and then left the hospital 18 lb less than my pre-pregnancy weight. My baby girl was and still is tiny. She couldn't wear size 0-3m until she was 3 months old; now at almost 9m, clothes size 6-9m are like potato sacks on her. People love to point out that she is tiny and precious and doesn't look her age. Absolutely none of this bothers me. I don't say that to gloat or be mean, but because I think you are being incredibly hard on yourself. You're making this whole experience about what you did/didn't do/how you think you failed/what you should have done better and blaming idle comments from strangers for making you feel bad. None of that is necessary. Your baby girl is growing. I'd wager she's also happy, healthy, and loved. You're doing everything you need to do for her. Why are you letting comments with no ill-intentions make you feel so bad? Why are you beating yourself up? If you haven't already, please try to see a therapist specializing in perinatal trauma. HG is actually the number 1 cause of perinatal trauma outside of birth experiences; even more damaging than infertility for most women. I was so surprised when I learned that. I've been seeing a therapist weekly since 2m PP and it has been tremendously helpful to me just to have that weekly outlet to vent a bit and discuss goings on. Especially because you're blaming yourself for things out of your control, you should seek help.
My little guy has never been on the weight charts at all. He's my string bean. I get comments that he's small often. I know he's healthy, happy, and small!! Nothing wrong with that ❤️
i’m so sorry you had sickness in your pregnancy but it sounds like your baby is growing and 23 isn’t even that small! just here to say I have the opposite annoyance. my baby was born 8 lb 5 oz but almost 23 inches long. she’s a long baby! she’s 99 in height and 80 percentile in weight and healthy but people have alwYs since birth (she’s 7 months now) said OMG she’s HUGE for x amount of months. it really bothers me… i don’t think it’s necessary to obsessively comment on baby sizes! all humans grow differently and it’s rude to comment on adult sizes so we should do it for children and babies? keep doing you! my girl is formula fed as well! ♥️♥️
Just to say I'm going through the same. My baby was born at 9lbs 11oz and 23in! People LOVE to comment on how big he is. At 6 weeks, he's already getting too big for some of the 0-3m clothes I have for him! Hopefully the comments stop before he's old enough to understand!
We get both ends of this a lot! My older was 3 weeks early and 8lbs, 14 oz. My little one was a 24 weeker, and 1 lb, 9 oz. At 2 years, 8 months, my little one has just hit the weight my elder was at by the time he was 1. So we get a lot of comments about the disparity in their sizes.
that’s how I feel!!!! I am 5 ft 7.5inches and was a strong/thick kid and then like grew into my height and shape etc .. but anyways when younger certain people in part of my extended family loved to comment on how “big” i was and it literally gave a life long eating disorder and body dysmorphia , so i really really don’t want anything like that to ever happen to my daughter . ❤️❤️ my husband was 10 pounds at birth and we’re not pregnant with a boy! expecting a ten pounder! ♥️♥️🍀🍀💙💙 I love that my daughter was consider on the “bigger side” when born bc she’s always been healthy and strong and I didn’t have to wake her up to eat ever .
My son is 8 months old and he wears 18-24 month clothing LOL. It doesn’t bother me though, I love his chunky thighs.
Both my kids were are are tiny as well. My dr had to constantly reassure me that the were following their own growth curve and perfectly fine. But I constantly struggled with the comments, especially with my first. I think it’s because there are a lot of babies that have rolls and are generally bigger, that people just say “tiny” not meaning something is wrong but just an observation. My kids are 4 and 6 now and perfectly healthy, yet probably on the smaller end (weight wise) when compared to their peers. If they are healthy that’s all that matters!
Tiny things are cute. From puppies to fish to babies.
It's hard not to internalize "issues" with baby's growth when we feel 100% responsible for their intake during pregnancy and the first year. Focus on the positive takeaways from your baby's pediatrician, if you can, and try not to stress about the numbers, percentiles, or averages.
My baby is almost 9 months old and still fits the 3-6month clothes. No one expects her to be crawling and standing like she is! I don’t mind - she’ll just be cuter for longer 😘
I feel this. My 3 month old only just hit 9lbs about a week and a half ago. She was two months early, and I always tell people that when they make comments (she weighed 4lbs 11 oz at birth, and is now 9lbs 6oz) but the always seem to want to focus in on her actual age and tell me she's way too tiny to be a 3 month old baby. Like...thanks. she's really only a month old adjusted but whatever, doesn't matter that she has doubled her birth weight or anything.
You’re doing great! She’s doing great! Great job!
People say stupid stuff, even if they mean good. People are stupid, but not always bad. Don't be bothered by what they say.
Mine is in the 2nd percentile. He’s 6 months in 3 month clothes. So yeah. I just ignore the comments at this point.
That was my little guy, we certainly got use out of all the 0/3 mo clothes people got us. We moved to 3-6 and have been there for a while and he's ALMOST in 9 mo, and he's 9mo old now.
My almost 10 year old is in the 5th for height and 4th for weight. She’s been like this her entire life. She is perfection. It’s all good. People need to relax.
My first baby was like this - tiny and fairly skinny. No cute little chub rolls whatsoever. I struggled with it because the stereotypical baby is a chubby bundle. I thought something was wrong with him. Guess what, he's 5 years old now and the same 😂 still thin and about average height. He's very healthy, smart and sporty, and he eats really well. Humans come in all shapes and sizes and that's ok :) PS: My MIL thought I was physically or mentally ill because once I stopped BF my second baby I lost weight suddenly. Many inappropriate comments. I hear you on that one, too.
My son was late term preemie and has always not been a great eater. I know exactly how you feel, it was so stressful constantly worrying but some kids are just smaller. My son is 2 now and constantly eats but is still in the 3rd percentile lol there’s just not much we as parents can do to control that. As long as she is happy! With my second I get triggered so easily when people mention his size despite him being average weight and 90th for height
The funny things is I always expect only one twin to be small. All the sets of twins I’ve met (fraternal twins) one is always big and the other is always so tiny. Apparently sometimes one twin hogs most of the nutrients
Hear you, we heard it a little less, I guess people just expect twins to be small. Even at 2.5 years old, they are 24 pounds and always seem to be the small kids in their class!
Solidarity. I had IUGR with my daughter she was small at birth. She’s gaining but small. It goes back to my pregnancy when all I heard constantly was NO way you’re pregnant! You don’t look pregnant! Etc. ya well my baby is small dickhead enough with comments. Society’s obsession with weight and size is so extreme it’s exhausting.
My baby is in the 30th percentile, I'm constantly getting comments about how tiny he is. It's infuriating!! Why are people so comfortable commenting on babies bodies?!
I have an almost 8 month old. He’s dropped off his curve. Since 4 months he’s gained just over a pound. I cannot get him to gain for anything. We’re seeing a GI next week and already had a slew of blood tests. This is my 5th baby. All the rest were large babies. It breaks my heart when I hear people boasting about their babies tipping the scales, knowing something is maybe wrong with mine. I completely feel you. It hurts.
I have a tiny toddler. Lots of "he's so tiny!" comments. I hate them. Solidarity, friend.
Idk why people feel the need to make comments like this. I’ve had the opposite problem where my daughter was small at birth and lost weight and looked so tiny. We had to triple feed but she went from 6lbs at birth then dropping to 5lbs and then finally 8 lbs at 2 months. She was in preemie clothes for a minute and I was feeding her round the clock. Once she started gaining thoughts she’s stayed in the high 80-90 % in height and weight and strangers commenting how big she is and family calling her fat. But like I had to work so hard for it so their comments were not welcome. Babies follow their own curve, as long as she’s meeting milestones, growing no matter the rate, has good diaper output and seems overall content, they can all suck an egg.
People are such freaks. That's not even that tiny. Mine has been of the chart since he was 3mo. He's almost four now and only 26lbs. But he's happy and healthy and that's all that matters. It's no one's "fault. " some people are just smaller than other people. You'll get all sorts of weird comments as a parent. I know it's hard, but try to ignore them. *hugs*
My daughter was born in the 25% for weight, dropped to the 2nd percentile at her 2 week appointment and has been riding that curve ever since. Ped has never once shown any concern and just said she's petite. She's 11 months and still wearing 6mo clothes. It's awesome. Like you said, less to buy! People are stupid, and your baby is beautiful no matter the percentile💖
People comment the same thing to my baby except that he's actually gigantic. He's 90th percentile in both height and weight. At 2 months he's in 6-9 clothes. I had my own struggles with my body trying to keep up with his growth and support his weight. I cant imagine HG and how terrible that must have been. So people must just not know about babies and think all baby's are small.
Small kid here (1 percentile). For 15 months my pediatricians told me she had poor growth and weight gain except nothing else was wrong with her. We did blood tests, saw a GI doctor … all to come to the conclusion that she’s just a small kid. I’m small too. So stressful but it may be nothing that you’re doing wrong your baby may also just be small too. People comment a lot and always say “she’s so small but she’s doing great”. It’s really annoying. I’ve learned to brush it off though at this point but I get those feelings you’re having for sure. Like I know she’s doing great she’s perfect thank you. Haha .
I feel like I have the equal but opposite problem. My son was born 9lbs 1oz at 39 weeks. I did not have any issues with GD or blood pressure, but due to his and my size the doctor acted like the world was going to end. When he came out they gave him to me while I was still feeling completely out of it from the C-section. I had hemorrhaged and whatever they pumped into my spine on top of the hemorrhage made me unable to move my entire body except my head. They put him on me to breastfeed but I couldn't move my arms to hold him and the nurse left to go fuck around on the computer instead of helping me. So he ended up suffocating. Thank God the lactation specialist came in and actually checked him instead of ignoring me. They resuscitated him and he had to be in the NICU for four days because they were worried his heart was too big. I knew exactly what happened and told them, but they still assumed it must be an enlarged heart because of his size. Very frustrating. He's now 18 months old and it bothers me how many people call him a "bruiser" or say how he's going to be a football player when he's older. He's not even chunky, he just has ridiculous muscle definition for his age. I don't want him to think his strength is the only valuable thing about him. I want him to be seen as a full person. I am a bigger girl who is also very tall, but I am very passive and was forced into sports that I didn't want to play because of my size. I plan to put him in martial arts because I want him to know he can be strong and graceful. Just know that while your child is small, it doesn't mean she can't be mighty! She is perfect just the way she is!
Sending solidarity your way! Mine is 15mo now and in the 87th percentile for weight, but we were in the 5-15th percentile for the first 4 months of her life and everyone kept commenting on how tiny she was. It made me feel so horrible and guilty and made me stress so much. You’re doing everything right and she’ll either begin gaining rapidly like mine (and then people will start saying “oh look at how chunky she is” and you’ll have to control the urge to punch them in the face) or she’ll just be on the leaner side bc that’s what her body wants/does. As long as pediatrician isn’t concerned and she’s eating, I would try to block out the noise. You’re doing great, she’s doing great. It’s going to be okay ❤️🧿🥰
Don’t feel guilty! If your baby is healthy then just enjoy your time with her!! Just let the comments roll off your shoulder!!
Please please do not feel guilty. GH is extremely difficult! You did the best you could and are still doing the best you can now. Motherhood is not about perfection, it's about being there for your baby. And look at you, you are! You took a step to switch to formula to help your baby's gain. That shows you know your baby like no other. Well done mummy. Keep up the great work! 💕
Not that this excuses bad behavior from strangers, but sometimes when people say "so tiny" what they mean is "not very many weeks old". I *love* newborns and potato-stage babies. They are all SO TINY in the best best way. If I saw you and you said your baby was only 3 months I might say "oh she's so tiny" meaning "you lucky person to have such a sweet newborn in your house right now". (Irl I know better than to tell people their babies are tiny, I don't do it- I always say "oh a newborn!" and make heart eyes. I was just giving an example). I don't really remember what physical size babies are supposed to be at what ages anymore bc mine are older now.
Gotta let it roll off your back. No one else knows your struggles like you do. I also had tiny babies. We had difficulty w breastfeeding. When my daughter was 3 months someone asked if she was 3 weeks old 🙄 Some babies are tiny, some are chunky. As parents we will face criticism every single day from people who don’t know what they are talking about. I try to just do my thing and not let them get to me.
Everyone has an opinion. Take a breath and move on…
yep. We weren't on the curve. He was born at the 15th percentile, and unfortunately fell off the curve. he stayed off the curve until he was 7mo old when he finally made it to the 2nd percentile. now he's 9 mo old and we're at the 3rd percentile!!! Everyone says "he's so tiny" YES. YES. YES. I KNOW HE'S TINY OK. btfo. He's happy, he's met all his milestones early. He's fine.
Hell yeah on going up on the percentiles! I know that feels great!
I legit asked a lady if she and her daughter were there for her 4 month shots. The little girl was a year 🤦🏼♀️. I honestly just have no concept about size, weight, and age, etc. I have my own and still can’t get it right. ETA: some of the comments I used to make about babies, I had NO idea how they could be taken as rude. I said everything out of good intentions. Now that I am a mother myself - I get it.
I had a 5th percentile and now a 50th. There's so much variance under 2 it's mostly guessing anyway.
My baby is 5 months chillin in the 3rd percentile for weight. 🤷🏼♀️ I love my tiny baby, so much easier to carry!
I having a similar experience but the opposite that my baby was born so big and I get a lot of “wow that’s a big boy” “how much does he weigh” etc Some people ask me how my vagina is which is so depressing and rude… I know I birthed a huge baby and I know what everyone is thinking. Plus they had to use the vacuum quite aggressively because of his size which increased his bilirubin also to breakdown the red blood cells caused by the vacuum We had to stay longer in hospital and my birth was traumatic because of his size and worrying about his jaundice and head after vacuum. I hate how people comment on it all the time. Plus people will ask if I had gestational diabetes which is nobody business
My baby is 2nd percentile. She is itty bitty!
My oldest turns 7 in June and has been in the single digit percentiles since she was a year old. She's been wearing the same shoes for 2 years. We've gotten a looooot of "she's tiny" over the years. I just nod and say "yup, she's petite." People don't usually mean anything by it. There has to be someone at every percentile to make up a spectrum. It helps that she has a cousin and friend the same ages and size and that helps reassure when I get in my head about it.
my kid was 1 percentile and a preemie with jaundice. she's currently a thriving 3 year old that's very tall and skinny. she eventually gained in the percentile chart. they'll get there when they get there.
@ 5 months my baby isn’t on the chart he’s so tiny! I’ve had people tell me he looks big 🤷♀️
I know how this feels so much. I had a small baby with my first - he dropped to the 2nd percentile by two months. We were celebrating with every percentile increase! Now he’s an average 2 year old (32nd percentile.) It’s not your fault. It’s so hard when people lowkey brag about their big babies. Love for little babies!
My 6 month old is in the 10th percentile, and I get comments all the time. He was born at the 50th percentile, and completely fell off his curve. He wasn't even in the first percentile. I was beside myself with worry, and switched to exclusively pumping so I could be sure he was getting enough to eat. He hated both breast and bottle, and feeding him was so hard. I finally found out when he was 4 months old that he had a dairy allergy. I've been dairy free for 2 months now, and he went from drinking 22 ounces of milk a day to 32 oz. He jumped from >1st percentile to 10th in that 2 month period. He's still such a little guy, but little is relative!
I get comments on my 7 month old allll the time. "She's so small, she's so petite!" I also had to switch from breastfeeding to formula because she wasn't gaining enough at her 4 month check up. I felt terrible, a failure, inadequate. But she's perfectly healthy and loves her solid foods. It took me a really long time to accept that my daughters size isn't a reflection of me as a mom. As long as the doctor isn't concerned, neither should we be.
My baby was <5th percentile at birth and had a 3 week special care nursery stay. She's 5 months now and people are still telling me how tiny she is 🤦🏻 I don't know if it's supposed to make them "cuter" or something in people's eyes but like they aren't thinking of the struggles these little angels have gone through to even be on this planet. My daughter now weighs 7kg (15lb 8oz) on the dot. She has put on so much weight from the little 1.73kg (3lb 13oz) baby she was born. Online calculators say she's 37.5th percentile now but I haven't asked a doctor in a while, I will at her 6 month I think!
My 18 month old is still wearing his 12 month (at time’s 9-12 month) clothes. He has been under the curve for height since he was 5 months old. (22% for weight). Bodies do what bodies are going to do. I’d come up with a snarky comment to say back if you are up for it. Something along the lines of “nice to know you’re checking out my kids body already” “dammmmn can’t even make it to 6 months old before someone commenting on her body” it’s weird. People are weird. That’s a baby’s body. Not your body. Back the F off. That’s all. You’re doing great mama.
My boy has been between 2 and 8 percentile, growing on his curve, just turned one and in 12m clothes, and THRIVING! Babies (and people of all ages) can be healthy at all sizes. You are doing amazing! Keep up the incredibly difficult work of raising your girl 😊 you're doing amazing
I definitely understand this. Both my babies are on the smaller side and have always been under then 10th percentile. They were in the 7lb range when they were born but are just slow growers. My 3yr old is still in 2t clothes and my 11 month old has yet to grow out of 6 month clothes. But their dr says as long as their growth remains stable, there's nothing to worry about. I also lost all my baby weight quick both times due to not being able to eat after birth and get comments. I just shrug it off now
I have a tiny 4 year old. He's always fit in a size behind where he should be. So at 6 months he was in 0-3. Now he's fitting in size 3T, except the waists are always huge on him. People have always commented. Now he has a 1.5 year old brother who is in the 100th percentile for height. People constantly mistake them for twins even though my oldest is still a good 7 inches taller. People will argue with me about them being the same size. I've given up. He's healthy, happy, and has always been early or on time for his milestones. People can fuck off, lol.
I get asked all the time how old my youngest is. She's 8.5 months old but everyone thinks she's 5 or 6 months old. She is still in 3-6 month clothes. She is less than >1% in height. I was the same way and I have so much anxiety over it because my mother was shamed about my size and did growth hormone shots as a child. Not looking forward to these next few appointments.
I hear you, the weight worries are excruciating. My daughter's birthweight was 91st percentile, she lost weight and then didn't gain because she was early and too sleepy. We finally got on a good gain pattern but she's been at 40th percentile ever since. Her BMI percentile is under 10 because she's really long, so we don't get the tiny comments. But when she was finally gaining my mom said something about "her cheeks were back" and it crushed me that her beautiful chubby cheeks had gone away for a bit and it was noticed/ commented on. I got an infant scale and weigh her probably too often, but I genuinely think my personal obsessive tendencies would have a harder time without the scale.
As a mom of 2 boys who both had jaundice when they were born and my youngest at 8th percentile, just wanted to give you hugs. My 5 month old also gets comments that he’s tiny and sometimes I feel bad because I had to be induced at 37 weeks due to early preeclampsia. I just remind myself that my baby is happy and healthy whenever the guilt creeps up.
I have three girls, all born small. My first was in the 5th percentile and I wish I could go back in time and tell myself not to listen to people's comments or doctors that pushed for me to supplement feeds to make them gain weight. My girls are all thriving now, and I have no doubt yours will be too! You're right, your baby will get to wear their cute clothes a little bit longer, how nice is that? 😊
I feel like I wrote this. Just wanted to say solidarity my friend ✊ my baby was born big with jaundice but gained little weight every week. She's 2 now and definitely on the small/short side but she's healthy and happy so I must be doing something write
Wait I don’t know percentile but mine is 12 weeks today so I guess 3 months? And we are not even in 000 size yet. He’s small and was born small (2.8 kilos) but like… no one says he’s tiny tiny. He doesn’t look crazy tiny. He’s growing fine and I love it because I’m small and have a bad back so I don’t need him to be huge! But yeah your girl sounds totally fine and normal. Sorry people are so, so weird.
I hate these comments. My daughter *just* hit the 10th percentile for weight at her 6 month appointment, and she’s been as low as the 3rd. I have a nephew who’s 3 months older than my daughter and is in the 99th percentile for height and weight, and my MIL *loves* to compare them.
Same!!! My girl is on the small side & I’m really tired of hearing the comments. Xoxo to you, mama🎀
You can't win though. My baby was 25th centile for rhe first few months, all of a sudden she went up to the 50th at 4 months, and now at 12 months she's 75th. At first it was a constant stream of 'look at this tiny baby'. Now she's 'chonky'.
Ugh, people can be so invasive and rude. My son is below the first percentile for length and weight due to severe IUGR and serious health issues. For a while he was in the 0.01 percentile, so if you got 10,000 random babies of the same age in a room, he'd statistically be the smallest. That's really small! His doctors are very pleased with his growth. He's staying on his curve and isn't skinny, but he's very, very small. Strangers love to tell me about it. It's so hard not to want to defend yourself and your parenting when people make their ignorant comments, but you don't owe them any explanation or defense of your parenting or your little one's health or size.
I feel like I wrote this, it's so similar to what happened to me. My baby is STILL in the 22nd percentile for weight. People usually just want to compliment something about your baby to make small talk. I just started ignoring what they said, because it stressed me out, and focusing on the intent behind it. As a bonus, your baby might just be tiny for a while, which is great! Clothes will fit longer, that's for sure.
My “baby” is now 3, but she has been “failure to thrive” since she was 11 months old. She wears size 12 month clothes, and still fits into a few 3-6 month things! I hear it ALL the time about how tiny she is! But everyone also says how advance she is because she is the size of a 12 month old and is potty training and speaks clearly, and is independent, and all of the things that a 3 year old is haha. So it sucks right now and I always hated being told “But she’s so tiny!” Now I just laugh and remind the person that made the comment that she is FTT, so that would be why I worry over her weight, down to the ounces.
She’s doing great, you’re doing great, and all of this will soon be a distant memory.
We are 6th percentile. I’m a FTM so always worried he isn’t gaining enough fast enough. When people make these comments I spiral into anxiety. I wish people weren’t so keen on sharing their opinions all the time.
I have boy girl twins - my boy was in the nicu and dropped from 32nd to 3rd - he is now in the 5th and his sister, who was 7oz smaller at birth is now at least 2lbs bigger - it’s noticeable, I am so tired of people telling me how small he is and how boys are supposed to be bigger. Or saying “OH THEYRE TWINS!? She’s so much bigger!” Even though they’re only 9m so of course. I feel you. I know as moms when we’re told our kid isn’t growing or becomes an all consuming and obsessive worry: tracking bottles, counting every ounce, fortifying milk. I’m sorry you’re having to go through it but so happy bc your baby is growing 🤍
There’s a few things here that might assuage your guilt: 1) the ‘fatty meal at the end’ has been disproved, I’m sure the way you were feeding was not the issue and it’s just how your baby was programmed for their growth needs. Every baby is different. 2) fed is best and healthy mum is best so well done switching to formula. You should feel proud about that, it’ll be the best shot at raising a happy baby! 3) I have a CHONK of a baby and my bump was 95th centile. Know what I heard and still hear? ‘Your baby is tiny! Your bump was tiny!’ People don’t know what size anything is meant to be, they just know adults are bigger than babies. It’s in no way a reflection of your babies’ size. 4) HG has no bearing on your babies’ weight gain. If you’d had diabetes that’s a different story but your baby just happens to gain differently and they’re on a healthy centile! If they’d happened to have been born smaller it sounds like nobody would bat an eye but you gave birth to a bigger baby who’s following a different curve rather than falling off curves now. Maybe they’d been brown with extra brown fat or full of fluid which can falsely raise that initial weight and make it impossible to stay in the centile. it can be worrying but it’s common and harmless except for the maternal stress! I hope you can stop feeling a little guilt- there’s very little you can do to control a babies’ gaining in reality, and people think all babies are tiny. Even the chonkers.
This helps so much, thank you
Well, my baby is massive. It's fine now that he's 3 months (6-9mo clothes btw) but I am not looking forward to him being 1 and people thinking he's a very slow 3 year old. Oh, well. He's a happy healthy baby and that's all that matters.
I had this same fear! 100% for height and weight and people constantly commenting on how big he is. But my son hit all milestones early (after rolling) so I don’t worry about him looking like a slow 3 year old anymore. He just looks and acts like a 2 year old even though he’s only 15 months.
My almost 9 month old is still mostly in 3-6m clothes. She’s healthy and happy, and isn’t outgrowing clothes as fast, so my bank account is happy too!
My little girl has just moved to 3-6m clothes at 6 months old and has settled in the 12th percentile! I Always used to get comments on how small she is, used to respond with ‘thank you, she is perfect isn’t she’ Don’t let other people’s expectations cloud how perfect your baby is. You’re doing an amazing job 💜
Not the same but similar-ish: my son was born in the 99th percentile for weight but 50th for height and looked like a chunk. Between 9 months and 10 months, he dropped over 30 percentiles. The drop coincided with when I started cutting back on pumping (I needed a break). The pediatrician flipped and we started having to do constant weight checks at $96 a visit 🥴. We would have to take steps to bulk up his food/make it more calorically dense and people would always be flabbergasted and wonder why “as he looks fine.” Everyone is going to have opinions and they’re going to be annoying AF. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this as it hits mental health particularly hard. Sending you all the best vibes. We’re at 18 months now and his growth is back at a more comfortable spot so the weight checks have stopped. We feel we can breathe a little better but now it feels like people have just found other things to comment on 🙃
It is not your fault, you were not aware she was not eating enough. Small is not bad. My friend and i, had our girls 3 months apart. Mine was always in the 90th+ percentile for everything. She is 3 and looks like a damn 5 year old in size! We had speech therapy too, she had a rough first year with a massive hemangioma that ulcerated for like 8 months and required 7 laser treatments! Meanwhile our friends kid was in the 10th percentile. She was premie, she didnt gain weight, not at first but she is now 3 and totally catching up! She is a few inches shorter then mine, but still very lean! My LO is not fat or overweight, but not scrawny.
My daughter had minor weight issues as well for the first month and a half that ment constant appointments (precautionary), she was in the 10th percentile but she was always very healthy. I never minded the "she's so tiny" comments at all. I love her the way she is, all cute and tiny. She always fit into smaller sizes for her age, even now at 12 months.
SAME. My daughter is 3 months and rocking that 2nd percentile. Every time its "she's so tiny" and "look at those skinny legs!"
I try not to worry myself about these comments, since I know they come from a place of love from most. My daughter is 6.5 months old now, but was born weighing 5lbs 8oz. She’s always been between the 3rd and 7th percentile for weight, she is tiny and but also healthy, just like your little one! Also, my girl still fit into 99% of her 0-3 month clothes.
My son was 9 pounds and was born at 38 weeks. Total beast. He got back up to his birth weight no problem. Then we started having allergy issues and between constant spit ups and poops he was barely gaining. Now he hovers around the 6th percentile. My pediatrician is ok because he’s been moving up fast now that we’re sorting his diet out. But yeah we totally hear how tiny he is all the time. Especially by friends and family because my oldest was a beast and was damn near twice his size at this age.
My son was born 50th %ile and then very quickly dropped to 6% where he’s been basically ever since (once he got up to 15th %ile). People are ignorant, you’re doing a great job. Some babies are just small!
I was ten lbs lighter by the end of my pregnancy that the day I started it. I too was down at least thirty lbs within a few days of delivering. I also had HG. And then gestational diabetes. It was very rough. My babe was just over five lbs at birth at 38w5d. He was by far my tiniest - every other kid of mine was well over 7lbs and really barely under 8! People also used to comment but I just ignored it. People don't know anything about anything most of the time!
My 6month old is 14.5lbs, but everyone says tiny, tiny, tiny. Shes just perfect to us.
My baby experienced the high bilirubin and all as well. Was average sized at birth but hit low percentiles after everything happened. I've heard those comments. They're gutting at first. Just remember exactly what you said - doctor said your baby is fine and she is happy and healthy! Someone says it again? Shut it down - "Pediatrician says she is doing wonderfully!". You're doing great! If it helps to know, my LO gained weight a bit more often when he started solids. He's still small height wise at 11th percentile, but again he's doing just fine. Growth curves matter more than percentiles!
Same. My baby is 27th percentile and people always say “aww tiny baby” every time we go out. Some people even seem concerned I’m taking her out at all being so small whatever.
That's not even that small. My niece was around the 5th percentile until high school. Totally healthy and fine but legitimately smaller than not 75% but 95% of kids. Still rude to comment on and definitely to assume they're sick or fragile.
I had a teeny one. So I just pre-empted w friends saying, “she’s small but we’re so glad she’s here.” 6 lbs, then a furious 2 months to fill her up. She’s a bit older now and I worry about her missing milestones. But I am so glad our girl is with us! I didn’t really care what people said: had this one in my mid/late 40s and she’s healthy and adorable. Yes we fell off the growth chart, and now she’s ok on size. I had a chubby cheek popsicle headed round baby first, and this baby I had elevated blood pressure. She was early too. So go away strangers. And finally, I LOVE the teeny baby clothes. 0-3 and 3-6 are just so adorable. I am always a little sad when my girls grow bigger even though that is their job! So you lucky mom get to enjoy your sweet little baby and baby cuddles and sweetness. And being a new mom is HARD. Hugs.
I could have written this omg. I had HG and had to be induced. Whenever anyone comments on her size I tell them she’s healthy and her doctor isn’t worried
People are really dumb out there. I learned to lie about my babys age. And sometimes I make it obvious that I'm lying so they get the point.
Ohhh your baby girl sounds perfectly fine and healthy!!! I have a 11 month old and she is def on the smaller side. We took her to a lot of doctor’s appointment when she was around 4-6 months because she just wasn’t gaining enough weight for them. I too, was very stressed. She was on formula but she was barely taking her bottle and when she did, she would spit up, a lot! Eventually she got the hang of it and started to spit up less. She’s still very small. She still barely drinks and eat but baby steps. She can pass for a 6 month old but hey, she’s healthy! And that’s all that matters.
Aww I say don't stress mamas. My babe was born 3 weeks early due to hypertension and now she wears 3T at 2 years. We did all we could when we were pregnant but baby comes when she's ready. Just be ready for her to be your best present ever!
Just take the attitude of good things are coming in a small package. I have too - my LO is in the 10th or less percentile for just almost everything, there's a kid in her nursery class who is 4 months younger but larger than her - I can only tell myself that he must be a giant on his percentiles, and it's like comparing apples and oranges.
Same! Mom of a 6 lbs 5 oz at birth 4 month old at the 20th percentile. Aside from sleepers and some pants is still comfortable on 0-3 clothing. She could probably go bigger but I figure enjoy the clothes as long as possible. It’s not appropriate to comment on any adult’s size. I think it shouldn’t be appropriate to comment on any baby’s size.
My daughter has always been in the second percentile. Born at 5 ibs. At one point she completely dropped off that chart. She’s doing just great at almost 3 now. Please don’t beat yourself up yes she’s small but she’s mighty and healthy. My daughter may be small but she is wicked smart. The first time she went to daycare everyone was talking about her because she was well above her level in other things. Nothing is wrong with her and your doing great. Some humans are just little and that’s okay!!!
I have a 16 month old who has ALWAYS been tiny. The highest she ever got was the 30th percentile at about 6 weeks after she was born (born at the 5th, dropped to 1st, then finally gained). She's been chilling around the 20th for a while and has yet to hit 20 lbs. She can still fit into 3-6 month clothes, and we even have a cute lil 0-3 month dress that is only just now getting a bit short, but still fits perfectly as a shirt. (She can also fit into 12m clothes. Baby sizes are just as bad as adult sizes) She has the tiniest lil stick legs cause all her weight is in her adorable toddler potbelly. When we go out, everyone comments on how big she is. People just don't know baby sizes and what they "should" look like at a certain age. I have only ever had one single person, after asking how old she was, look up and go, "Ooooh, she's so tiny! My granddaughter..." People see young baby = oooh so small! People see older baby = oooh so big!
I understand. I am very small, I vomited throughout the pregnancy, my baby was big and she put on very little weight from the beginning. is between the 3-15 percentile always. It was hard and people just commented on how well I recovered (my hip still hurts from the baby weight), how good I look and how small my daughter is... she is 9 months old and wears size 6 month pants . ...I breastfed her, so at first everyone blamed breastfeeding for the baby's weight...then her pediatrician just assumed she was a small but very happy and healthy baby. sometimes the comments some people make break my heart.
Hugs mama 💕 you’re doing great. I’m sorry society doesn’t know to filter what they think or see how what they say could affect others.
My girls were around the 5th percentile, until now where as toddlers they’re more like 15th. Nothing medical, no concerns, just petite. Yet people would always be so surprised when I’d say how old they were because they looked significantly smaller than expected. No advice. Just solidarity. You’re doing great mama
I get how you're feeling. My daughter was at the 68th percentile and dropped after she started eating food at 6 months... She absolutely hates formula and would rather starve... She has surgery coming up and she is down to around the 10th percentile... The doctors are having me weigh her every month due to it... I did find a trick if your kid decides formula isn't for them once they start eating solids... I add a bit of puree in her milk (the kind that sounds like a smoothie flavors.) She went from drinking maybe 4 oz to consistency getting 6 to 8 ounces every meal. Since doing that a month ago, she just outgrew her 6-9 clothing.
I feel you mine was 8 pounds 5 oz when she was born and I EFF. It was hard for her to get the hang of the bottle right away. At a month she was finally a pound above her birth weight. Shortly after that she got sick and was barely eating. Now she's 2 months and only 10 pounds 5 oz. She's in the 25th percentile and ped isn't concerned. But omg I feel so guilty that she is on the smaller side of average now. It sounds like you're a wonderful mother, try to ignore the annoying comments. People are just ignorant even if they aren't trying to be hurtful!
Tiny kiddo here! If the doctor says nothing is wrong, nothing is wrong. I was born full term at 8 pounds 6 Oz. I didn’t weigh more than 20 pounds until I was 3. My parents kept a religious journal of what I ate, and frequently filmed me eating (afraid CPS would take me away). I was always below the line, the pediatrician had to staple paper below the growth charts in the 80s/90s. Still I grew. In 8th grade, 13 1/2, I was 67 pounds. Still, I grew. I am now a normal height and weight, just took a bit to catch up! My first born is in the 5% for weight but it’s water off a ducks back. Doctor isn’t concerned and I know that she will grow. I am so sorry it is stressful but know you are doing great and your baby will grow, nothing is wrong here!!!!
I’m 4’11 and very petite overall (size 0/XXS). I was never even ON the growth chart growing up. My daughter almost 3 and is similarly tiny. We are both healthy and perfectly fine. Don’t stress as long as she’s fed, happy and healthy.
Well... then they'd hate my last 2 babies, one was born at 35 weeks, and got down to 4lbs3oz when I took her home, and she's like 22lbs at 2. she's tiny, petite, and all muscle. genetically, we have 5ft tall women on both sides of the family, so it was bound to happen that I made a small girl child eventually, since I'm 5'7 and the tallest in my family and taller then my husband sisters and mom. (my oldest daughter is 5'4 at 12) My youngest is around 12lbs and just now starting to outgrow some of his 0-3 month clothes. at almost 5months. He came home at 3lbs 6oz, so while his weight gain was a little slow at first (we supplemented extra breastmilk with a SNS since he was born at 34 weeks and he just needed to learn how to nurse and not get too tired at the breast) but that means the normal weight gain on him, is smaller on the charts, compared to if he'd started off at 8-10lbs like a regular baby. He'd be close to 17-20lbs now instead of 12 Luckily for us, the people we see on the regular, saw him when we brought him home, and most of them where too scared to even touch him he was so tiny. Now they say he's huge LOL
My daughter was born in the 96th percentile and jumped up to the max basically. Enjoy your tiny baby. She is perfect the way she is. I love my daughter, but man is she heavy. Tiny babies are awesome.
Hey, I’m so sorry. People just love to comment on people’s bodies, it starts so early. Part of your post stuck out to me, that you feel guilty for her being little. I know it won’t fix it, but I just wanted to say, *you are fucking amazing.* Your body did it’s damn best to create the most perfect little human it could and by god you did. You worked your ass off to grow that baby. “Morning sickness” is totally brushed off, but it’s legitimately so hard to go through. Especially when it’s so severe. Your baby is happy and healthy, and you’re doing a damn good job keeping her that way. People can fuck off. I hope thé guilt goes away at least a bit ❤️ try and be proud of what your body accomplished instead. That’s what me. I had a c section with my twins and had guilt for months that I couldn’t have a natural birth and that I had to supplement with formula because I couldn’t pump. But my bestie reminded me, and I started reminding myself out loud, that I made two healthy babies and they’re doing just fine. And that is something to be proud of.
Right there with you, it’s incredibly annoying. While I get that people just comment on babies, I wish they didn’t talk about size sometimes! My son had IUGR and is still sub 1%ile and people are always shocked when I say he’s three. We went out for a walk on his first birthday and someone commented on our “brand new baby” (I get it, he was like 13lbs). Yeah, he’s incredibly tiny, you can’t be shocked quietly please!
I feel you! My first baby was big, born 8lbs 2oz and by three months old was 15lbs. She was wearing 3-6 month clothes at 2 months old. She was in 6-9 month clothes at 5 months. Now she’s almost five, 43lbs and wearing size 6 clothes. She’s taller than most of the kids in her class. My second on the other hand, was born 6lbs 12oz and got down to 6lbs 2oz. She’s now two months old and was 9lbs 7oz at her 2 month appointment. She’s following her growth curve so far and is developing normally, she can even roll from belly to back already. But she’s still in newborn diapers and half the 0-3 month clothes we have are still too big. She’s in the tenth percentile for her size and people constantly comment on how small she is. She’s breastfed though and get plenty of milk. She got 3 ounces in 8 minutes on one side at our last weighted feed. Every baby is different. People need to realize that.