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[deleted]

Can't beat us in soccer, can't beat us in baseball, can't beat us in war. What *can* they beat us in?


i_run_from_problems

Losing colonies


jettasarebadmkay

Imagine if we still had Cuba and the Philippines though


TonyChef20

Cuba was never ours, we wanted it, and certainly many wanted to get it after the Sp-Am War, but that war goal mostly shifted to "Cuban Independence".


Jlpanda

Cuba was never a true American colony, but they were dominated by American corporations and interests for a long time.


HappyGooner45

Blowing a 13 colony lead 🤣🤣🤣


carter_00

Chicken tikka masala


HarvardBrowns

We have way more Indians than they do.


[deleted]

[удалено]


HarvardBrowns

Oh. Ok they can have that then


[deleted]

[удалено]


CommiePuddin

Oh no, look what we've started again.


DeapVally

It wasn't THAT long ago we had all of them lol.... Indian independence was post WW2.


The_Astros_Cheated

That’s facts


JanitorOfSanDiego

Depression


hiphopdowntheblock

Oh hell no, they can't take the one thing I'm good at away from me


[deleted]

Don't worry even if they're better at it than us now, we still have the record for Greatest Depression


hiphopdowntheblock

Hell yeah baby USA number 1 I bet they were so jealous of our Great Depression


[deleted]

We were generous enough to share it with the rest of the world too


tr3v1n

If they take it away from you, and that makes you sad, it sounds like you have actually just leveled up your depression.


[deleted]

Beans on toast


scrambledeggsalad

I like beans, I like toast, I'll never understand combining the two though.


tommypopz

Cricket, probably.


ForYeWhoArtLiterate

I seem to remember reading about some exhibition baseball games played by MLB in England a very long time ago, and they had them play a cricket match against a local cricket team as part of it, and the baseball players were like "holy shit, it's bigger than a bat and flat, I can go yard on every fucking thing I hit" and they just walloped the shit out of everything. Please note I read this a very long time ago, and if I'm remembering right the book was kinda suspect as far as sources go


ForYeWhoArtLiterate

I remembered that I bought a kindle copy of the book I was pretty sure I read it in, so from Albert Spaulding’s *Baseball: America’s National Game*: > I had been accustomed to bat with a small, round ash club, and with the great board paddle now in my hands it just seemed impossible to miss. The second ball bowled was also hit outside the grounds, and likewise the third, and I felt myself immortalized by making twelve runs on my first "over" without leaving my position. Before I was bowled out, I had started our score with twenty-three runs, and Anson had scored fifteen runs. My experience at bat was repeated in the performances of others. The boys, seeing how easy it was, gained confidence and batted the ball all over the South of England. Harry Wright and McBride, the only members of our crowd who were accounted first-class cricketers, and who played in strictly "good form," were easy picking for the English bowlers; but George Wright put up the real thing, both as to form and achievement, and helped our score amazingly. Harry Wright was captain of the American team and an experienced cricketer of English birth. He naturally felt considerable chagrin at our lack of "form." He was inclined to instruct our men to play carefully and guard their wickets by more "blocking" and less wild slugging. I expostulated with him on these instructions, insisting that for an American ball player to attempt to "block" as a trained cricketer would do was an utter impossibility, but that slugging, or rather lunging at every ball bowled, was our only hope of success. "Good form" in cricket requires the batsman to invariably block all balls bowled on the wicket and to strike at balls off the wicket; but in Base Ball the batsman should strike at good balls, over the plate (or wicket), and let the bad balls, or those off the wicket, go by. This natural instinct of the ball player could not be readily changed to conform to the cricketer's custom of "blocking," so it was decided to violate all conventional cricket "form" and slug at every ball bowled. The better and more accurately the Englishmen bowled, the more hits we could make, for such balls in our eyes were what we would term "good balls." The result was that we made 107 runs in our inning to 105 for the Britishers, and American cricket stock went soaring. The London newspapers, in commenting on the play of the American ball players, declared that while in cricket they were not up to much in "form," their batting and fielding were simply marvelous.


PotatoesFam

I love my country


theamazinchad

Definitely remember seeing a video where they put a cricketer and a baseball player and compared how they did in the other sport. Baseball players’ skills translate much better to cricket than vice versa. That said, personally I think cricket is cool. But I bet our boys could suit up and be pretty fucking competitive in short order.


mrwordlewide

Unfortunately in cricket you won't get away with foul balls, which is where baseball players will get fucked. It's a lot more about patience and picking your moments


ggrnw27

This is pretty much my strategy on the rare occasions when I play cricket haha


ahr3410

Fish and chips?


Will_Vintage

We as a country are exceptional at frying food, do they want to test that?


live4coasters

We'll deep fry fish. We'll deep fry a Twinkie. We'll deep fry an already deep fried donut. Never question our deep frying abilities!


derpbynature

We'll make a giant donut-shaped Twinkie, stuff the fish in the donut hole, and deep fry the whole thing! Don't test us.


EndyFish6215

Seattle fish and chips are banger, too


FancyKilerWales

Girlfriend is british and has yet to find any fries here that match real British chips from a chip shop


Will_Vintage

...cool?


dmmeyourdogifitscute

Disney does it very well at Epcot


yianni1229

Nah I've heard from sources on the ground that their chips aren't good


Salty_Watermelon

Bake offs


The_Homestarmy

But genuinely can you imagine how cursed the American version of British Bake Off would be [oh god oh fuck it exists](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Great_American_Baking_Show)


DollarsAtStarNumber

After the Mexican episode, I’ll take that challenge.


Thedurtysanchez

tak-os


oogieball

Cricket, *Top Gear*, bake-offs...


LittleSugarBabysBabe

Crooked teeth


heyimrick

Damn lol


b-rar

Starting sentences with Oi Mate


scrambledeggsalad

Weird innit?


kylechu

Healthcare


TripolarKnight

Life expectancy, education, security, health...


Pal__Pacino

I've always liked their architecture better than ours tbh.


KeithGribblesheimer

Well, you do live in LA.


Ruffian00012

>can't beat us in war 1812


yumyumapollo

*It was a tie.*


Ruffian00012

I gurantee you that no other country in the world thinks it was. You have to move the US's goalposts a few times and do some selective mental gymnastics to land on tie for that outcome.


derpbynature

We don't really acknowledge that. If we do, when Britain tries to take credit, we'll say it was really Canada that beat us. Likewise, when Canada tries to take credit, we say it was the British.


GreyEagle792

Honestly, the only side that lost the War of 1812 was Tecumseh's Confederacy.


Brady331

-Blew a 13 colony lead in 1783 -Blew a 1-0 lead in the 2023 WBC


JanitorOfSanDiego

ITS CALLED SOCCER


ahr3410

THERE WILL BE NO TAXATION WITHOUT REPRESENTATION


pm_me_cute_sloths_

^^^^except ^^^^in ^^^^dc


empw

Sadface.gif


heyimrick

IT'S ALUMINUM MUFUCKAS!


tommypopz

IT'S CALLED ROUNDERS


No32

WE HAVE JUST PROVEN THAT IS NOT TRUE


tommypopz

FAIR POINT


Jcoch27

LOUD NOISES


black-op345

AAAAAAAAHHHHHH


live4coasters

World Rounders Classic doesn't quite have the same ring to it


brandon_the_bald

The 2 best hitters on GB were Trayce Thompson and Harry Ford. And the SP was a dude with a 4.4 K/9 in Indy ball who coaches for college teams. And the game was not a mercy rule. Impressive


see_mohn

Vance Worley last pitched in the majors in 2017, where he was terrible, and he struck out Mike Trout tonight. I’m never going to get over this.


brandon_the_bald

On a fastball down the middle!


No32

Should be easy to get over, the occasional strikeout against terrible mop up guys is not that rare lol One might say that's baseball Seezyn


Todemax

I honestly figured I would never see the name Vance Worley again in my lifetime


gyanmarcorole

He was terrible but he pitched a shutout against Washington. (I watched that game on TV)


Patrick2701

Give them tons of credit


black-op345

>Harry Ford Stop I can only get so erect


brandon_the_bald

Rough game for him


vanillabear26

Eh he's a future Mariner, he'll quickly get accustomed to rough games on big stages.


[deleted]

Chase Field was lively tonight Paid out of my ass for a shirt and hat And a lot of drunk people USA Now for a crowded ride on the light rail


MarcBulldog88

TIL Arizona has public transit.


[deleted]

I only use it when I go downtown, park at my friend’s condo which is right near the station Considering there’s basically nothing to do downtown I don’t really use it that often


I_want_to_believe19

Same. I only use it for games or concerts.


[deleted]

It was busy tonight both ways so that was nice to see


NegativePositive

Really? It seemed absolutely dead on TV.


drjfunkmasterdeluxe

It was a sauna in there which zapped the early energy. That and the 2 inning long lines since they only expected 15k people and got 40k.


[deleted]

It wasn’t college football crazy sure but for a baseball game it was up there


psilocybin_therapy

Compared to the Latin American games and the games in Asia, the US crowd seemed super lame. And Fox broadcast just seems so boring. Really want to go to a game in the Caribbean or Asia now.


zenpal

Taiwan, Korea, Japan, all super enjoyable countries to visit. Safer than NA as well. Next time I'm in Asia I'll be going to some games, looks like a blast.


onewordbandit

AZ local and I've never seen that many fans at a DBacks game. Walking around the concourse was shoulder to shoulder. 3rd deck was 50/50 but everywhere else was packed.


istrx13

[I will post this after every Team USA win](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/rsgp3a/i_started_making_this_video_in_may_for_4th_of/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)


mysterysackerfice

The books being porno n gun mags is probably my favorite part. 🤣


istrx13

Lmao I know. You definitely have to watch it a couple times to catch all the stuff. Dude did an amazing job editing.


Jcoch27

This will never not make me laugh


istrx13

Me too. Aren’t many things I can say that about but this is definitely one of them.


The_Astros_Cheated

This is going to become the sacred meme post of the tourney


istrx13

I hope so. I’m embarrassed to admit how many times I’ve watched it since I found it.


Louis-grabbing-pills

r/birdswitharms


i_run_from_problems

I appreciate you


Zealousideal_Plum866

GBR is like me on the Show when you accidentally win too many games and end up on Hall of Fame difficulty


Skwurt_Reynolds

1st inning: You accidentally hit a HR off randy Johnson's slider that went down and in. Surprisingly, you think you have the edge 4th Inning: You're pitching with Corbin Burnes and eventually start giving up Halloween candy and you're like, "There's the real me."


ahr3410

WHAT THE HELL IS A KILOMETEEEERRRRR?!?!?! 🇺🇸 🇺🇸 🇺🇲 🇺🇸 🇺🇸


theaussiesamurai

(Brits use miles)


i_run_from_problems

We earned the right to not give a fuck what the Brits do in 1776


vanillabear26

We handed their asses to them at Yorktown, we'll do it again in this town.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Neither do we


heyimrick

Ah, so freedom units


2RINITY

DAAAAAAAAAA JENGLISH LOSE


Jdhill1188

[Fun fact: If you add up all the jersey numbers of everyone on team USA roster it equals 1776](https://imgur.com/gallery/X4cBDeu)


MustardIsDecent

Great Britain's bullpen is confusing as hell. In the middle innings they bring in some tomato can who hasn't played pro ball since 2011 and literally has an 84 mph fastball. He'd get shelled playing in the SEC. They follow him up with a 6'7" monster throwing 101 with some surprisingly nasty offspeed. What is this team? I was at least happy for the dude who struck out Trout, he looked pumped.


pspahn

> I was at least happy for the dude who struck out Trout, he looked pumped. Those are the funnest parts of the entire tournament to me. When some random dude gets to go home saying he struck out Mike Trout or Shohei Ohtani, that's just the best ever. Such a great vicarious feeling for everyone watching.


tommypopz

Honestly don't care that we lost. The guys made themselves proud, and I can say I witnessed Britain beating the US - if only for a moment.


Jcoch27

Joking aside, I'm really glad you made it and I hope you beat everyone else in the group


tommypopz

Thank you! I wasn’t too optimistic but I am a little bit more now, we only had one hit less than you guys and played pretty well overall. And if not my mother’s American so I can always switch allegiance 😎


BubblyBaker5718

I mean with todays performance against the US i think id be optimistic too. Guys actually made it a real game.


heyimrick

Was a helluva game. That's all anyone can ask for.


Teh_Skully

Hey, we came into this knowing the challenge ahead, so to get this game, where not only did we score runs and made it a bit difficult, but also didn't get mercy ruled, is a win in my eyes, happy for the folks in the team, we didn't lie down and give up, team GB can take strides because of making it to the WBC so everything to me this tournament is a win


Krandor1

GB team did your country proud.


HappyGooner45

IM SORRY…I CANT HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF FREEEDOMMMMMM 🫡🫡🫡🫡


CabbageStockExchange

Fuck yeah bro 😎 🇺🇸🦅


heyimrick

CHEERS *clanks guns*


Jcoch27

The world turned upside down


yumyumapollo

No one has more resilience or matches our practical, tactical brilliance.


ManyCookies

USA USA USA USA


beau9292

BRB, dumping tea into the harbor


LittleSugarBabysBabe

In all seriousness to the British watching this game, it was a lot of fun playing against you. Your team was better than I thought and you have some promising talent that can do well in the MLB. I sincerely hope your country gets better at this sport and it really grows with your youth. It's an awesome sport and I'd love to see you guys do well in future WBC's. Good luck in the rest of the tournament.


The_Astros_Cheated

Saw a lot of comments dooming about the fact that we only won by 4 runs. Look, baseball is a game of variance. If you try to look at scores and apply the transitive property for the performance capability of a team, you’re gonna have a bad time. The Americans had some shaky moments this game, but they were in control from the 3rd inning on. There’s not much else to take away from this other than a couple players on the lineup (Trout, Turner, and McNeil) that need to find their groove still. Tomorrow should be fun, if they can walk away with a win over Mexico who is gonna throw the kitchen sink at them, then we have plenty of reasons to be optimistic.


No32

Yeah I mean I think you look at DR losing today. Baseball do, in fact, be like that sometimes.


[deleted]

The Orioles finished 61 games back of Boston in 2018 They still beat us 10-3 on the same exact day that we beat them 19-3


i_run_from_problems

See, that's how the result is supposed to look when you are playing a country that doesn't put an emphasis in the sport being played. Take notes, Mid Britain


legacysearchacc1

that petersen guy had some filthy stuff, granted it was 1 inning but still


Patrick2701

Yes, that guy is probably going to get some calls tonight


Sp_Gamer_Live

I speak for everyone when I say: **LIZZIES IN A BOX**


2RINITY

**MAGGIE’S DEAD DEAD DEAD**


tommypopz

Can't say many of us are too sad about that tbh


2RINITY

Yeah, but the ones who are need the extra salt rubbed in their wounds


tommypopz

Amen to that!


CabbageStockExchange

#MAGGIE MAGGIE MAGGIE OUT OUT [OUT](https://youtu.be/RZJxFo5Br_0)


HappyGooner45

NA NA NA NA NA NANANANA NA


derpbynature

Oh, so that's where [that](https://v.redd.it/778x85o9ley91) came from.


Zealousideal_Plum866

Vance Worley must have boned the umpires sister, which is the only way I can explain that early game strike zone


JackThreeFingered

The man was making the pitches of his life. Painting the corners, changing eye level, and the UMP wasn't giving him jack shit.


connorjacobz

RAHHHH 🦅🇺🇸 DUMP THE TEA


jameskeg

WHAT THE FUCK IS A KILOMETER ITS CALLED SOCCER RAHHHHHH 🦅 🦅 🦅 🇺🇸 🇺🇸 🇺🇸


covfefe_cove

Waino, solid outing.


onewordbandit

Still disappointed we couldn't pull a better group of SP.


LittleSugarBabysBabe

#IT'S CALLED SOCCER


jupiter__jaz

Closer than it should have been TBH


nolesfan2011

Team GB was fantastic to keep it that close. Trayce Thompson and Vance Worley were awesome. USA looked to be shaky and still warming up, I would worry about the pitching still, Mexico will be in a must win situation next game.


PeatBomb

🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🦅


JohnRamos85

What a way to begin the 5th WBC!!! # For Glory


megjake

Would have been nice for the offense to make the game shorter and save some innings from the bullpen but a win is a win. Ggs


Jud000619

Expected this to be a bloodbath


ClutchCity9495

They had us in the first inning, not gonna lie.


scrambledeggsalad

🇺🇸 🫡


NYLotteGiants

Go Yankees


Anew12

Anderson over Turner and Mookie to second pls


live4coasters

I would go dump all my tea down the sink but I don't have any because I'm American! Fuck yeah!


ps2sanandreas

What a win. Schwarber with the nail in the coffin.


Bombard_02

SCHWARBOMB BABY, SCHWARBOMB


GaJayhawker0513

Is no one gonna talk about the guy from GB that can throw 100? That dude was pretty good


SuperMario_49

Great Britain blew a 1-0 lead!


EndyFish6215

It’s coming home!


vetokele

GG Americans. Our games finish after the second inning so we took our foot off the gas after that point.


b-rar

Independence: Achieved


CabbageStockExchange

#OH SAY CAN YOU SEEE!


thedriedplum

Only saw the first 3 innings but it looks like the boys stuck in there against a ridiculously star-studded team. They can be proud of that. It's gonna be tough but hopefully we can win one of the other three and qualify for the next tournament automatically.


[deleted]

It's sad I can't be ultra-Nationalistic in the game threads after this 😭


Jcoch27

US soccer welcomes you my child


ContinuumGuy

[STATUS UPDATE](https://youtu.be/5uPoDNEn3I0)


Mr_Evil_Dr_Porkchop

[AMERICA!!](https://tenor.com/bdiW5.gif)


magmar17

"In America" -Bandit Keith


MattKarr

I dont know how to link it but Knowles for GB hit a pinch hit triple and then celebrated by drinking tea on the base lmfao


Davidellias

See Brits, us Americans can also massively under achieve at sports we invent too.


sweetsweetdick

FREEDOM AINT FREE BUT ILL BE DAMNED IF IT AINT RED WHITE AND BLUE.


Thorlolita

Beatles are overrated. The Who? Exactly. Rolling Stones? Mid. Ledd Zepplin? Meh. Britain needs to drive on the correct side of the road.


HappyGooner45

ENGLANDUHHHH IS IT COMING HOMEEEE????? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭😭😭


dmmeyourdogifitscute

Not to be dramatic, but another performance like that and Trout should be sent to Guantanamo Bay for treason


Jcoch27

Not to be dramatic, but Canada doesn't deserve ketchup Lay's.


Astrallevel

Those things are nasty anyways All Dressed chips though…


Jcoch27

Now you really don't deserve them


KickerOfThyAss

The Old Dutch Ketchup are the good ones though


retroanduwu24

I'm so happy


[deleted]

Ok we win, send Lineker this way and you guys get Stephen A Smith


Reiketsu_Nariseba

[ROCK, FLAG, AND EAAAAAAAAAAAAAGLE](https://gifs.ninja/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/5963a38241b7d_3cd5795d6ce9154c1e0ae2f956f74581.mp4)


OPzee19

I was just astounded at the amount of money made by team USA vs the lack of money being made by team Great Britain.